Saturday, January 26, 2019

Flyiing High is Fun. Until it Isn't. #CBBUS2

I don't even know where to start.  Last night's live eviction show was tainted by the most ridiculous "twist" that has ever existed on reality TV.  I know having Anthony quit the show was unfortunate for the Production schedule, but the lipstick they put on that pig was hardly a digestible solution.

On second thought, I don't even like that expression, because implying that a pig needs lipstick to improve itself is false. Pigs are already perfect.
I'm sure there are people out there who are stupid enough to believe that a twist that was never mentioned or alluded to beforehand was actually planned in advance.  I believe that Anthony told Production he wanted to leave, so they concocted this ridiculous story in an attempt to cover it up.

We're not that stupid, but maybe some of the CBS casuals will accept that lame excuse for a "twist".  If I was even a little naive, I would have been happier in life.  Maybe I would be whistling a happy tune and tossing daisies out of a basket right now.  But no, that is not the case.

I also didn't like the vote to evict Jonathan.  The entire house knew that evicting him was not a unanimous decision, so Tamar switching her vote to appear cooperative was not only totally unnecessary, it was quite rude to Jonathan, who never did anything to anybody in that house.

He also didn't campaign or spend much time with anyone not named Ryan, but I felt badly for him that the vote was so lopsided.  And I was surprised that he was so flustered when it was his time to shine, but I guess the shows he works on are mostly pre-taped for later viewing.  I think he was in a sort of blackout during his speech, because for someone who is usually so articulate and measured, it made little sense to me.

And don't even get me started on the "live endurance" competition we were supposed to see after the show.  I waited over two hours to see it, and finally went to bed when I realized I could wait all night and still be disappointed.  Apparently the competition started just as I was getting in bed.  Maybe next time they can scroll a message to us to give us an idea how long we need to wait.

So it was The Wall, and I bet you never guessed that Kato Kaelin would be the eventual winner.  I know I didn't....

I watched most of it on the live feed flashback, but it didn't have the usual spirit and energy of this type of competition.  I think the theme was rock and roll or something, and it looks like they recycled the OTEV character from a few years ago to sit as a decoration on the sidelines.

Of course the wall tilted, and they were pelted with "sugar" which might have been meant to represent cocaine (seriously) and later with a "jello shot" and some sort of beer.

I think Kandi said the "sugar" was actually Bisquick, but plain old flour is probably more in line with the Production budget.

Tom was the first to drop, after telling them that since "his core had been cut open a few times" he found it difficult to hang on.  He actually swung his feet back and forth for a minute or two, trying to get back on his peg, before dropping to the mat.

Then there was a loud thud when Kandi dropped, saying she didn't want to be the first one to fall.

Kandi:  My back was cracking, and my butt is too big for that. I couldn't stand flat against the wall.

When she walked up to the seating area with Tom, Ryan tried to act nice and give her a fist bump, so she patted his side with her dirty hand.  (I was surprised to see Ryan give such a shady reason for nominating her on the show last night.  Kandi is salty about that, obviously.)

And Joey was a BIG whiner the entire time, talking into his mic about how they should hurry up and speed this competition along so he could warm up and go inside.  When people are the star in a multi-camera sitcom, I guess they can snap their fingers and have everyone jump to attention.

This is not that, Joey.  And people don't watch network television like they used to.  Maybe your team should have negotiated with Hulu or Amazon Prime instead.

Then they got squirted with this white stuff, which Tom said he DID NOT want to know about.  I think it was a mistake to do this, because can you even see who is still up on the wall at this point?  No one is recognizable to me, even in close-ups because they are wearing goggles.

We all recognize Tamar though.  She was EXTRA theatrical about how afraid she was to drop, DEMANDING that the crew bring in a ladder so she could climb down.  Of course, that did not happen, so there was a lot of fake crying while her cast mates talked her through letting her feet swing like Tom did and then dropping.

When Dina finally fell, she got a standing ovation from the crowd, and Lolo yelled that she's a "fucking savage".  She did great, with a light strong physique that is well-suited to this sort of thing.

Natalie Eva Whatever:  How old are you again?  (rude)

Dina:  Old.

 Lolo thinks Ryan would have been great at this, due to his wingspan.

I forget to mention that Ricky was the third one to drop.  He's not built for this type of thing, no matter how much yoga he does.

Then these three people came in and the OTEV thing shrieked at them to close their eyes and mouth.  Kandi started yelling that they should turn their heads, so they don't get anything in their nose.

I guess those are fire extinguishers, right?  Because Faux OTEV was shrieking that this "crowd is on FI-YAH".  Then the three guys just marched off stage right, with Tom yelling out comments about how the stage crew showed no emotions.

Joey:  This is ridiculous. I'm miserable.  I just want them to get this going.

Lolo:  This is it.  It is going.

Tom:  They want you to get going and fall.


Tom:  This would be a weird Olympic event, wouldn't it?

Ryan:  They'd be up there three days.

Kato ended up making a deal with Natalie and Joey, promising them they would be safe this week.  I think his body type is ideal for this...lean strength.  Joey kept saying his "traps" hurt, and joked that "Kato has no traps".

Kato apparently has groin injuries, so he asked Natalie how he should drop, after asking the crew to tilt the wall lower to the ground for him.  She told him to swing and then fall on his butt, and then immediately ran over to cover him with a towel and congratulate him.

Natalie Eva: Dude.  That was great. How old are you?  Fifty-nine?  (so rude)

Kato:  Shussshhhhh.  Don't tell everybody.

 I wish Kato would send Ricky packing this week, particularly after how rude he was to Kato yesterday.

But I heard him tell Dina this morning in the storage room that he's thinking about putting up Kandi next to Tamar.  I hope Tom talks him out of that.  Kandi needs a damn break so she can take a breath and get into the game.  It's hard to negotiate from a position of weakness (ie being on the block) and Kandi knows that.  She's read The Art of War, I'm sure.

And Tamar got into it with Lolo this morning for NO REASON, bringing the live feeds to a screeching halt several times while they may or may not have come to blows.  Basically Tamar was upset that Lolo and the Other Girl were hanging around with Dina until 4:00 am and Tamar took offense to that.

Because Tamar is CRAZY and IRRATIONAL. And apparently Lolo was in a bad mood because she feels the elements in the house and competition messed up her hair color, turning it green.  So she demanded that Production send in a stylist to correct it, or something like that.

In the second fight, Tamar told Kandi that "the next time somebody called her a bitch, she was going to start YANKING".

Lolo:  THEN DO IT!!!!

Tamar:  THEN SAY IT!!!


And then the feeds were down for at least four hours.  Thanks Tamar, you BITCH.  Go ahead and YANK me, whatever that means.

(If it means "SHANK" though, then I am terribly sorry and meant no disrespect, ma'am.)


Tom and Ricky showered next to each other, with Tom singing because I'm sure he knew it would make Ricky mad.

You might know that Ricky demanded Tom perform his stand up act that he does about being fired by Trump on The Apprentice, but Tom said he didn't want to be that political on the live feeds (smart) so then Ricky called him "a prick".  He later apologized because he was worried Tom would flip the vote to evict Kandi, but a forced apology doesn't heal all wounds.

Ricky has been pulling strings and purposefully trying to intimidate the guys that are smaller than him (Joey, Tom & Kato).  He's playing a dangerous game because in BB, you never know who is going to hold the power.  It's often someone who you never expected it to be.

She always assumes the posture of someone who is about to fly off the handle.

Ryan told the group that he used to be the face of Ralph Lauren, before he got into all of that trouble.

Ryan:  Like if you went to Macy's, there were big pictures of me in the Men's Department.

Apparently he spoke with Ricky about the "Rio Incident" and got very emotional about it.  I heard Ricky say that Ryan doesn't like to talk about it, but it's an interesting story.  I also heard Ryan talking to Natalie about being in recovery.  Ryan said he used to drink and pop Ambien (a HORRIBLE combo) and when he went to rehab there were all sorts of people in treatment with him, including  a doctor who had performed surgery earlier in the day.  Natalie said she has been sober for about 6 years, so good for her.  I'm not sure if she required a stay in rehab, though.

I flew to Europe with a good friend who was drinking with me beforehand in the Delta lounge, and then she took two Ambien on the flight.  She claimed later that she didn't remember anything about the flight, and I actually hope that is the case.  She was so mean and hurtful to me that I moved about six rows back to sit with some sympathetic strangers (and handsome, too).

But my point is, if Ryan was drinking and taking Ambien, that could explain his regretful actions in Brazil.  I think that is what brought Tiger Woods down, too.

But what was Ricky taking to agree to this photoshoot?  Weed doesn't lead you to make choices like this, does it?  Ricky was the STAR of the team and he agreed to this.

What the fuck?  No wonder he quit his $30,000,000 contract with the Dolphins and went to hide in a tent in the woods overseas.

Kandi stood in the hall to put her make up on, and was standing there when Tamar got into a very loud beef with Ricky.   Ricky was really a dick to Tamar, demanding that she share her feelings about not trusting people.  So she had a big blowout with him.

And then it was time for Tamar to make her breakfast.

Eva Natalie's husband works in tech, she says.  I think he works for a gaming company in LA.  She said the name but I forgot it since I'm not a gamer.

See that small skillet just to Tamar's right, next to the red tray?  Well, Dina went to pick it up and burned her hand in a very painful way.  She didn't realize it was hot.  Tamar told her to put butter on the burn so she did...not sure if that is an old wives tale or not.

And all of that clean laundry is still spilled out over the floor.  Some poor intern had to deliver that and stack it up and must be demoralized to see it just disregarded on the floor.

I really thought Jonathan knew he had a good chance of leaving, because he had conversations with people that sounded like he was wrapping things up.

I wish certain people would stop mocking Joey's various hair issues.  I'm not a fan of Joey, but being a child star is a very hard life to live and if he's insecure about his hair, so what.  Plus, a LOT of men are insecure about their hair (or lack of) and if you said the same things about a woman, it clearly wouldn't be okay.  It's just mean and unnecessary.  There are plenty of other things to say about Joey, so try to be more original and creative, please.

===>  When the stories about how children were (and ARE) victimized by the Child Star System finally come out, everyone is going to be HORRIFIED.  Actually, many of the stories are already out there, but no one seems to take action on it.

I'm not saying Joey was targeted or abused, but I'll bet some people he worked with were.

These two girls have made lots of mistakes in this game, but other people are making even bigger mistakes so they can just coast for a few more cycles of play, I think.

Here is Ricky getting into it with Tamar.

Tamar said she bought these glasses in downtown LA and wanted to wear them when "the shade" was necessary.

When Tamar went to Kandi to vent about Ricky, Kandi said he got snappy with her, too.

Kandi:  I don't feel like I can say anything to anybody right now, actually.

I'd rather hear what Kandi was actually thinking at this point, with Tamar suddenly coming to her for sympathy and reinforcement.

There is a story out there about how Tamar was "thrown off" a Delta flight.  I'm not sure that is what actually happened, but I did see the footage either Tamar or her manager took of the Flight Captain coming back to her seat to tell he that he is charge of the flight, and his Flight Attendants are there to carry out his orders.  He then asked her if she planned to behave like you'd talk to a child.

Apparently this all started because Tamar had a blanket over her head on the plane before it took off.  I believe that part of the story.  But I don't believe that the pilot coming back to her seat was the first interaction Tamar had with the flight crew.  I've been on way too many flights, and only know of one time where the pilot had to visit someone in their seat for disciplinary reasons.

(And that person was one of my co-workers.........who had unfortunately mixed alcohol with pills on an international flight and ended up being greeted by the police when the plane made an unscheduled stop......and that's all I can say about that..............)

(....that person lost their job shortly after that incident...............but is still out there holding a position of authority at a very large corporation, per a quick Google search....)

(Don't do drugs you can't handle, kids.  And Oympians.  And professional golfers.)