7 ways you can help someone with anxiety

Saying "don't worry" is NOT one of them

Anxious woman sat on bed
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To see someone you care about experience anxiety is hard to watch, and loved ones can often feel helpless. But there are things you can do to help without dismissing the severity of their condition. We spoke to the psychologists from personal development and mental wellbeing app Remente about what to do to help someone who's suffering from anxiety.

1. Find out more

When it comes to helping someone you know with anxiety, the first thing you need to do is find out more about what anxiety is and especially what it means for your friend/loved one. Communicate as openly as you can, but also conduct your own research by reading as much as you can on the condition to find out about what other people are experiencing. The more you know, the more support you will be able to offer.

2. Listen

It can sometimes be difficult to understand why someone is feeling anxious about certain things, so make sure to ask and actually listen. For many people with anxiety, thoughts can become so crowded and tangled that even they don't know what's necessarily bothering them. Simply listening to them can help them to organise their thoughts and instill a greater sense of calm.

3. Be patient

Many people with anxiety are prone to jumping to conclusions, and since these conclusions can often be extremely negative, they might end up thinking that their loved ones are unhappy or angry with them. Instead of getting frustrated and irritated by this, you should find the time to calmly talk through the situation and find a workable solution for the next time your loved one gets anxious.

4. Don't trivialise

While you shouldn't confirm someone's anxieties, it is never a good idea to tell an anxious person to "just get over it" or "stop worrying". Just like when you feel sad and want people to sympathise, the same happens to people with anxiety. The vast majority of sufferers know that their fears and worries are irrational, so they really don't need anyone telling them this, let alone their loved ones. Instead, just listen to them and let the episode ride itself out.

5. Keep them company

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Hanging out with friends is a great way to distract someone from their negative thoughts and worries. If a friend or loved one is feeling particularly anxious, ask them if they would like to do something, whether with just you or a bigger group of friends. However, as you try and get them out and about, keep the below in mind…

6. Don't push them too hard

One of the problems with anxiety is that it can leave people feeling absolutely exhausted. If someone you know suffers from anxiety, it's likely that they are often in a hyper-tense state, both physically and mentally, which can be absolutely draining. Remember this if you're trying to make your friend get out more and be more active, they might not be unwilling, just genuinely too tired.

7. Take care of yourself

If you spend a lot of time with someone who has anxiety, it can sometimes start to affect your own mental health. When you start feeling overwhelmed or stressed, make sure to take some 'me-time' and do something you enjoy. It is always better to take a step back and relax, as being stressed around an anxious person can just increase their own levels of stress, setting off an unhealthy chain.

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