November 25, 2006

Air Canada Jazz - Fewer amenities for better rates. Yes, even that.

It was cold in Whitehorse last night. It was -37.7oC and dropping when Fawn checked the temperature just before we went to bed. As we were lying in bed and talking, I wondered if our 6:45 Air Canada Jazz 1 flight would even go in the morning.

I don't plug in the car very often, but it was one of the first things I did this morning. The cold showed no signs of leaving. Dark and early, we drove down to the airport, checked in, and I drove back home to drop off the car.

As crazy as it may seem, this is the kind of weather I like best. There's not much you can do when it gets too hot, but at this time of year, when "Old Man Winter" decides to flex his muscles, you can at least dress for it. I dropped off the car and started my walk to the airport. I was bundled warmly, except for my legs. By the time I arrived at the airport terminal, the skin on my thighs were starting to sting from the contact with my cold pants. I was grateful I hadn't worn jeans (and had, in fact, seriously considered wearing my snowpants).

Into the plane and, after some seat shuffling, wing de-icing, and waiting for unknown causes, we were on our way.

The flight attendant announced that there would be no hot drinks because the coffee and hot water machine froze during the night. People seemed to be okay with that, since most of them were already asleep. A few splurged on the $5 muffins.

Part-way into the flight, the attendant answered a page on the phone. We couldn't hear what the voice on the other end was saying, but we could hear every word the attendant said since the phone was broadcasting his side of the conversation over the intercom2.

"The tea and coffee machine is frozen. I can't make any."

"The toilet is frozen, too.

This was news to everyone, since they had only been informed about the tea and coffee machine being frozen. Some of the passengers started to snicker at this point, since the attendant was still clueless that his voice was being broadcast over the intercom.

"Just some pee. No, nothing else."

The chuckling in the passenger cabin increased.

"There's not much I can do about that."

"No, nobody can use the toilet. That's right, it's frozen, too."

The passengers were now guffawing, and the attendant still didn't realise that everyone could hear him.

"Do you know a way to thaw it out?"

"Oh, just a moment," he said, looking at the laughing passengers and realising that he was the in-flight entertainment, "Let me call you back."

Later, he explained that the pilots were giving him a hard time because they were desperate for coffee. That was frightening enough in itself. Still, I take some comfort in knowing that even the pilots get reduced service on Air Canada Jazz.

1We're using up our points and when that's done, no more Air Canada - for reasons that you may already be aware of. Of course, the beautiful irony of this posting is that I'm using the Air Canada Lounge wireless network in Vancouver to make this posting - from outside of the lounge.
2Not an exact transcription. Slightly abridged.

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