It’s Hard To Be Yourself Online


Who am I?




The Suffocating Nature of Social Media


And some traits are best unrevealed.





This Is Exactly Like Real Life


Pictured here: Real life.



Trying hard to find yourself online? Follow three simple rules:


What Do You Think?



The Hopeless Irony Behind This Tragedy




My thoughts go out to the entire Fisher family.

5 Poetic and Outrageously Funny Twitter Accounts

Not on Twitter yet? You’re missing out on a goldmine of inspiration.

Some folks who don’t use Twitter imagine it as a channel into the menial tasks of their friends’ boring lives. And yes, plenty of people use it that way. You don’t have to follow them, though.

Courtesy Mashable.

No, what Twitter offers the writer is a smorgasbord of hilarious, provocative, contrarian and literary art. It’s a shame that so few people have realized the artistic and entertainment value of the medium. Today, I’m doing my part to let people know.

Check out 5 of the most genius and inspirational Twitter accounts for writers below.

1. Rob Delaney (@robdelaney): Rob Delaney is THE stand-up comedian leading a whole new generation of Twitter comedy. At times, it feels like his brain is firing off random neurons. But just about everything he tweets turns to gold.



Part of his charm is his delivery. This guy knows how to pack a punch every time he spits out 140 characters. From harassing corporations to detailing his strange turn-ons, Rob Delaney keeps me in stitches all day long.

2. Cranky Kaplan/Wise Kaplan (@CrankyKaplan/@wise_kaplan): Bonus!! Here’s a two-fer any self-deprecating writer will love. Based on former New York Observer editor-in-chief Peter Kaplan, the two accounts are bipolar parodies of a man I’d love to make friends with.

True to his name, Cranky Kaplan spends his time berating followers, bad-mouthing Manhattan and detailing his strange, gin-fueled exploits with capitalized fury. Half random tweets, half inspired narrative, following Cranky Kaplan is a roller coaster ride of angry laughs.

Wise Kaplan is an insightful parody that focuses more on a narrative cadence. Wise Kaplan is out of touch with a fast-paced social media world and pontificates on modern life in Manhattan.

3. Horse ebooks (@Horse_ebooks): There’s no real method to Horse ebooks madness. According to Wikipedia, the account “is a widely followed spam Twitter account and internet phenomenon” that “is intended to promote low-quality e-books about horses.” To keep Twitter from shutting the account down, the owner posts random snippets of text that arrange in a strangely avante-garde entropy.

4. Horton Atonto (@crushingbort): While Mr. Atonto’s bio reads “Freelance photographer for plus-sized cats clothing catalogue”, there seems to be little other information on the web about this tweeter. In fact, Horton Atonto has yet to attract a large following. But it won’t be long before people recognize the genius of his timely and hilarious societal commentary.

5. Sarah Beattie (@nachosarah): Sarah is a lovely cosplay enthusiast. That’s about all I know. Her tweets lack punctuation, delivering an urgent laugh every time she lets loose.

Honorable Mention: bog tity (@BogTity)

6 Reasons Why You Should Be Very, Very Careful What You Read Online

By now, you should know you can’t trust everything you read online. Newspapers are on the brink of extinction. Tuning into CNN or Fox News…well, just don’t tune into CNN or Fox News. Media has gone haywire, and it’s all thanks to this little thing called the internet.

Ironic masks aren’t helping, either.

Of course, the internet is also a repository of useful information. I won’t deny that I find most of the information I’m looking for online. Still, if an article looks biased or opinion-driven, it’s best to at least follow up on the facts encountered. Media outlets are businesses trying to drive revenue. Some have insightful content. Some don’t. Here’s why you should be wary of what you read.

1. Websites will say anything to draw you in. Remember how important your headline is? Plenty of people use headlines to sensationalize stories. A lot of these headlines might take advantage of trending stories. Cracked has an excellent article on how tons of journalistic outlets used the zombie bath salts phenomenon to generate traffic.

Many of these types of stories may be based in fact. But plenty of stuff you read may throw facts straight out the window because…

2. The web is a gigantic opinion-machine. TechCrunch is an excellent source of tech-related information. Working near Silicon Valley, I hear the name of the popular website many times a day. TechCrunch is popular because it brings a flair for opinion-based reporting that livens up stories and gives the outlet spunk.

And that’s why things like this happen. TechCrunch contributor Mike Butcher takes a step away from the news to ramble about an ‘entitled’ PR rep, riling up the website’s community. Fortunately, many readers pointed out the irony of Butcher describing the poor dude as ‘entitled’.

An article like this is doubly scary because…

3. Journalistic integrity has gone out the window. The golden days of journalism brought with it certain codes and ethics that writers should always follow. Now that anyone with a friggin computer can share their version of the news, tons of untrained amateur journalists are taking the web by storm.

As a result, fact-checking has been debased to Wikipedia entries. Writers across the web have bastardized the old norms of fact-checking in lieu of making a quick buck. But that isn’t even the tip of the iceberg when it comes to journalistic integrity because…

4. People are paid to embellish. There are plenty of different iterations of this one on the web. For instance, software providers often pay writers to become affiliate marketers. They’ll set up a software review site, for instance, that covers a specific market but favors the company they’re working for.

Independent bloggers get free stuff from companies all of the time. If a business sent you a free product, would you be inclined to write poorly about it?

The really scary part is that people get away with everything above, much of the time because…

5. Anonymity is easier to achieve. Sharing an inflammatory opinion or scamming your audience is simpler when you can do it without a face. Writers who produce poor writing don’t necessarily have to take credit for that writing. It’s a problem that web has dealt with since its beginning. And, as a result…

6. Search engines don’t always take credibility into account. SEO searches for strong content. A strong writer produces strong content. But strong writing does not an accurate piece make. Articles that show up in the first page of web results are just as susceptible to providing inaccurate (if not downright dangerous) information. Right, Fox News? Right?

Low-Impact Statements Won’t Make You Any Friends

Everyone has that friend that makes a mountain out of a molehill.

“Ugh. It’s Monday and the train is running slow this morning. This is going to be a terrible week.” According to ‘that’ friend, a relatively small thing will impact the course of his or her entire week.

‘That’ friend may have positive things to say as well. “Just saw [insert D-list actor] walking down the street. My life is complete!!!”

These are low-impact statements dressed up as things people should care about. In marketing (as in life), there are ways to do this effectively. Hyperbolizing low-impact statements is not the correct route.

People may write low-impact statements because:

  • They don’t understand their audience (or don’t care)
  • The ideas they share are self-centered
  • The main theme or idea is unclear
  • They are drama queens

Not every sentence you write will land with the kind of impact you desire. But that’s okay. In business writing, everything should lead to the big picture. But, if you’re summing up a theme or message, the sentence must ring with impact. Hyperbole is transparent. How do you increase the impact of the statement without blowing it out of proportion?

  • Empathize with the reader by framing the pain-point, problem or situation. This requires a clear understanding of your audience.
  • Clearly demonstrate how your product, service or organization solves the problem. Do this simply but descriptively. Statements that resonate require clarity and relevance — not exclamation points, italics, editorializations or aggrandized concepts.
  • As I’ve mentioned before, shorter sentences often have a greater impact.

Keep these tips in mind and you’ll avoid becoming ‘that’ writer.

How to Make Your Shitty Headlines Pretty

I think most savvy web users are becoming familiar with effective headlines, even if that familiarity is occurring in your subconscious.

For bloggers, headlines are critical. They’re first impressions. They’re a means for search optimization. They summarize, intrigue and captivate.

Forget the papes, I’m startin’ my own blog.

If you have a sneaking suspicion that your headlines are shitty, there’s plenty you can do to ground yourself. Take a look at some of the tips below.

1. “How to” headlines are a-okay. Kind of an introspective reference there, yes? People love “how to” posts because they’re straightforward. They lead with the purpose (practical advice) and follow with the subject matter. There’s no question about what the content should present.

2. Ask a question. Questions leave an air of mystery to your post. If presented well, they evoke the desired response from the reader: they read on to learn more. Make sure that questions are provocative, accurate to the content and are answered by your post.

3. Tie in trends. You can draw in fresh hits when you keep content timely. Reflect posts that cover trending topics in your headlines. That’ll help your search presence, drawing in readers researching those news topics.

4. Kill the buzzword. Every time you write a buzzword, a copywriter has a seizure. Don’t be that guy. Stay away from buzzwords like “industry-leading,” “innovative,” etc. They can be big turn-offs.

5. Stay positive. When you’ve developed an audience, you can tie in a negative post headline every so often. Until then, try to stay positive. Believe it or not, people aren’t searching for more negativity to add to their lives. They can visit their Facebook news feeds for that.

For a crash-course in writing headlines, check out this post over at Copyblogger. And add that shit to your blog roll! They’re pretty neat.

Why PR Is Broken

Everyone’s a critic. No, seriously.

By now, it’s clear that the editorial landscape has changed, for better or worse. Small newspapers are dying, magazines are going under and a swath of online publications have replaced the old guard.

In the midst of the content revolution, PR firms slowly came to a conclusion: adapt or die. Some have successfully adapted. Others have adapted in ways that mislead their clients.

If you’re considering working with a PR firm, consider this: twenty years experience in public relations doesn’t translate to jack-squat in social media management. It means something for content development and SEO — but chances are firms are working with on-staff or freelance writers to develop the bulk of that content.

Today, PR prowess really comes down to contacts. Like any line of business, it’s all about who you know. That’s part of why PR is a dying industry.

Then he asked me if our PR firm was “full-service.” Bahahahaha!

You have hundreds of channels in your space where you can grab a little exposure. Are you really planning to pay $10k per month for a mention in the New York Times? How do you expect that to affect your bottom line? Even if it does, how can you measure it effectively?

I recently had the accidental pleasure of attending a PR roundtable with some heavy-hitters in the space. It was mainly an opportunity for the sponsor firm to schmooze some potential new clients. I attended with one of my clients and was completely ignored by our hosts. The roundtable eventually spiralled into an orgiastic discussion of self-preservation. The takeaway? “Our communications experience makes us well suited for social media management.”

The truth is that it doesn’t. One of the greatest moments of the discussion was when the firm’s president admitted, “We’re recruiting strong, young talent to help us move deeper into this space.” Because they aren’t native social media users, and they’re simply following the blanket trends. The company was in the process of enacting systemic change across their giant international organization. Without cleaning house, you’re basically positioning your company as experts in something related to but distinct from your actual expertise.

I’m not arguing that all PR firms are doing a poor job. What I am saying is that the value of true PR is lower than you think, especially for start-ups. And if you need a person or company to manage your social media or content marketing strategy, why not work with a more specialized firm?

So, again, if you’re evaluating your need for a public relations firm, think it out carefully. What exactly are you hoping to gain from the experience? Take a hard look at the value of public relations, and evaluate other options like SEO experts, writers and content strategists against it.