The Afternoon Wrap: Thursday

Here are renderings of another plan to expand the Brooklyn prison on Atlantic and Smith by turning it into a "Jail with Retail" and condos. This one was rejected by the Department of Corrections before investors even had time to scoff. [Curbed]

An aspiring writer managed to grab a piece of the city’s meager subsidized housing stock, plunking down $14,000 for a Mitchell Lama co-op on the Upper East Side, just a stone’s throw from Elaine’s. [NY Times]

SHHH! A secret vaudeville theater on the Lower East Side is discovered. Who are we kidding? It won’t be a secret for much longer. [Gawker]

The Helmsley Hotel asks singles to be their "anti-valentine" at the second annual dinner to commemorate Singles Awareness Day (yes, it spells sad… sadder still that it’s already been copyrighted). [City Room]

A waiter at one of the city’s most romantic restaurants Two if by Sea dishes about lovers’ spats, conjugal visits in the bathroom, the geeky things men do to impress their dates, and all the other Valentine’s Day behavior a server needs to prepare for. [Grub Street]

What is more awkward than hearing your parents talk about sex? The Health Department’s revamped Valentine’s Day condom distribution campaign that tells New Yorkers to "get some." [Gothamist]

The Toll Brothers revealed a rendering of their plan for the unnamed site on the banks of the Gowanus Canal… toxic fumes not included. [Gowanus Lounge]

The Afternoon Wrap: Thursday