Wizard of Id

“Arise, O Wizard of Id. Your majesty, the crowd is waiting for to deliver your message.” I, the Wizard of Id, the aging king of the Akunamatata, slowly opened his sleepy eyes, woke up that new year’s morning, realizing that another year had just past. I dragged the fact that I had to wake so early just to deliver a stupid new years message to a bunch of nitwitted idiots. Sigh. I didn’t have the choice. I stroked the white patch of hair on my head, climbed out of bed, put on my Sunday’s best and proceeded to the royal towel balcony.The drums rolled and the trumpets blared. Embedded within the trumpets and drums was the crashing of rotten eggs and the loud jeering of the peasants. The smell of it was good enough to make me puke from a thousand meters. Then walking past was worried Sir Elton John. He reported the chaotic situation outside which made me tremble. “Who’s warming up the peasants before my speech?” I stammered. I was relieved to know that my most faithful advisor, Sir Rooney was on his duty. I was confident that he would do a good job. After all he was liked by all, young and old. ” Good that should deplete most of their rotten eggs.” I held onto my speech draft and waited until the crowed quieted downOnce again, the drums rolled and the trumpets blared, to announce my majestic arrival. “The king will now deliver his most profound ‘new year’s message’ ever,” exclaimed Sir Rooney. My time had come had come. The speech I was going to make would affect my reputation for the last years I’ll be living on this earth. I was determined to convince those peasants about democracy. I tipped-toed and stood on the royal balcony, only to see the peasants looking hard at their vertically challenged king.I cleared my throat and started, ” Happy new year to one and all welcome to the annual New Year’s message. I hope that this year would be a prosperous year for the nation of Akunamatata.” I paused and continued with my main point of the speech.” This year, I hope to impose in this nation the importance of democracy. From now on, you shall have the freedom off speech. You would be allowed to voice out your option about the governing of the nation. There would be open forums and government officials would regularly do door to door visiting to find out about your daily problems. All opinions from the public would be taken into consideration. There would be no discrimination between the rich and the poor, or the young and old. Everyone should be allowed to have his or her own space.Secondly, everyone would be given freedom of religion. You would be given the freedom to not only practice your religion, but also share about your religion to others openly, as long as your do not destroy the peace in the nation. You would be given the right to bear arms for the purpose of self-defense. You would be allowed to open fire at those who are in the act of a serious crime. However, sever punishment would be imposed to those how misuse this privilege.”The crowd were all listening intently and warmly agreeing with my message. I was delighted and paused to look at my draft. I paused and continue. “I will also be giving also citizens the right to select your own leader through a free election.” However before I could finish my sentence, there was a loud cheering among the people”Yea, yea!” There was a sudden uproar in the people. A series of ‘oo’s and ‘ah’s and ‘yea’s were heard. “Over throw the stupid king!” shouted a voice from the back. The very next moment, hundreds of rotten eggs were being aimed and shot at the royal balcony.”Over my dead body.” I continued. But it was too late. All was left of me was an old man, covered with smelly eggs. Overwhelmed by the smell of rotten eggs, I, the Wizard of Id, the aging king of the Akunamatata, slowly took his last breath and died.