Wednesday, March 5, 2014 ❣


Friends, how do I define friends?

Well first off, if you've only gotten to know me just recently (these past couple years that is), you most probably would only know a hand full of facts about me. And that is even if we spent every minute of  the day together. But if you have known me since half a decade ago or less, and are still friends with me, you'd seemingly know what I'm about to blabber on in this post. Let's hope it's not as lengthy as all my other emotional posts.
Disclaimer: I honestly am not trying to promote myself or to nourish the fact that I am very significant or anything. And neither am I trying to discriminate any other types of people. It's kinda weird to have to put a disclaimer note here but I just had to. 
After everything that I've experienced and gone through the last 5 years or so, I've come to a point where I start ranking every new person I meet before getting to know more about them. Don't judge a book by it's cover, you say? Well actually, I call it enhancing your analytical ability. I don't see the point of being friends with someone if they're gonna be complete assholes. (pardon the language.) Or being friends with the general 'Friend-of-a-Friend-of-a-Friend'. And neither do I see the point in being close to those who invariably forecast doom and gloom based solely on their bad experiences.

Why would I want to torment myself by clinging on to those that makes me feel dispirited to be alive? And plus, it doesn't really matter how I judge someone in my mind now, does it? As long as I keep it to myself, I think it's perfectly reasonable.

Now before you start going all 'Oh she doesn't need friends' on me, I'll have you know that I do. And I do think that it is important to have some connections. But on the on the other end of the spectrum, neither do I think they are all that.

I agree, building connections are unquestionably important. Particularly with those who are substantial in the future. But how do we know which are the ones that would soon be one of the most resourceful and valuable people out there? Figure it out. Back to my point, yes, creating connections are important. But networking isn't a number game. There's no way to build meaningful connections with dozens, much less hundreds of people. Why develop so many senseless connections when you can only truly connect to a handful?

To cut my 5-year-sob-story short, I have major trust issues. Therefore, I hand pick the bunch of friends I hang out with. Yes, I'm choosy and I have requirements. But no, I don't shout it out to the whole world about how and what I think about you, no. I keep it all to myself. Which is what I meant by this being perfectly reasonable.

Being picky and all is the reason why I don't feel comfortable making new friends in my university. (Don't get me wrong, I have a bunch of great loving friends. But they're just all not in the same uni as me.) Every single life form in my course are competitive and that makes it even harder to find real friends. I made a handful of them and honestly, I sincerely do think that they are enough.

Some people drift like zombies. They wander aimlessly from task to task, from day to day with no plan and no goal. But here, everyone has their very own purpose. And they'd start slaughter if you were to get in their way.
