Friday, April 13, 2012


Dear Readers,

I'm extremely sorry for a super duper lack of updates! I went into labor a week earlier than my due date and gave birth to beautiful Baby Zooey on 3.25.2012 at a quarter after midnight.  I am currently adjusting to motherhood and it's been quite a ride and I'm loving it!  Say Hello to baby Zooey. ♥  

 She was born 5 lbs 11 oz.

photos by Jeska

Everyone has a different experience when giving birth...thru our entire 9 months of pregnancy, we have so many questions..there is so much information out there that we are often overwhelmed and don't know what we should and shouldn't do.  Let me just say that is one of the best websites to join once you know you are pregnant! It's very very VERY helpful!

I spent a good 30 weeks of my pregnancy in TOKYO..where the food and water were rumored to be contaminated with radiation.. This was SUPER stressful... I was eating out often and asking where everything was from.  I have never been so picky but for once I had to think about someone other than myself... my baby.. So the minute I was asked to come back to California by my mom to have my baby, I went right away...

A lot of things changed the minute I came back here.. My relationship with my new OB was different.  I felt that he was available all hours and I could ask him ANYTHING.  I often consulted him about things that 'my friends' told me and he always took the time to explain why I should stop listening to everyone else. I just had to trust him and I did.  Of course I trusted my OB in Japan too, but there was always a part of me that was hesitant to ask things... So basically, what I learned is that although it is great to be knowledgeable, sometimes it's better NOT to listen to what other people say.. especially fearing experiences of friends of friends etc...

Everyone will have a different experience..  One BIG thing I had to think about was whether or not 'to use an EPIDERAL'. OMG- the EPIDERAL saved my life......Towards the end of my pregnancy I kept complaining that I wouldn't know when my contractions would come...but oh boy, did it hit me like someone stabbing my lower back with a huge knife while some else was kicking my tummy upwards.  YES IT DOES FEEL LIKE MENSTRUAL CRAMPS x 100000!  The first time I felt them, they were manageable, but as they got stronger and the intervals got closer together, I kept thinking...HOW THE HELL DO WOMEN DO THIS WITHOUT EPIDERAL!??

I had learned some basic anatomical things in birth class and the moment I felt my contractions getting really close, my cousin took me to the hospital..but I turned out to only be 1 cm dilated.  For people who don't know, you need to be 10 cm to start pushing.  I had a long way to go.  I actually ended up going home after the first night and went back to the hospital the next morning.  My parents thought I was crazy...but I actually thought I was going to be able to sleep when I got home .. stupid me. I was trying so hard to endure the contractions and could NOT sleep at, the next morning I went back to the hospital at now the contractions were making me was hurting SO MUCH!!! But I was still only 2cm..WTF!!!! I was contracting for 8 hours and I was only 2 cm!?!?! well, for some reason my blood pressure was really high so i was offered an Epideral at this time....I took it.  It was smooth sailing after this and I just had to wait til I was more and more dilated.  They had to administer Pitocin to make my contractions stronger--contractions which I did NOT feel anymore..It was a miracle. so fast forward...

Hours later...I was finally 7cm..and my water broke (which I didn't feel). It was getting close to that time. I was getting nervous..Oh baby going to come out now? I was getting ready to PUSH..but.. because my epideral was STILL on..I didn't understand what it meant to PUSH!!!!! I know this sounds dumb but I think that because I couldn't feel anything but pressure 'down there'...I couldn't PUSH properly because I couldn't 'feel' that feeling...It was super frustrating!! Everyone kept telling me, PUSH like you have to POO, harder!! but I just didn't know if I was doing it right!!! So about.. 30 minutes later or less (I lost track) my FINAL PUSH..I felt the dr. pull baby out..and then I heard her cry...It was the weirdest feeling ever!!!!!! but SO AMAZING!!!!! I DID IT!!! I GAVE BIRTH AND IT WASN'T AS BAD AS EVERYONE SAID IT WOULD BE!!!! I had already felt like..oh wow, I can totally do this again!!!... lol

SO that was my experience. I immediately got to do 'skin to skin' with my baby...which was another amazing thing to experience.  I recommend that anyone giving birth do this with their baby, where the nurse puts the baby on your chest and you spend an hour sharing skin to skin, feeling each other's heartbeats...I'm so grateful that baby was totally healthy and fine.  I breastfed right away..just like how the breastfeeding class taught me.

It's been a few weeks now..and I'm getting better at this motherhood thing.  I love my baby girl sooo much and never thought that I could love anything this much!!! I understand now why women need 'time' after birth...maternity leave is definately important.. I didn't think I would need this much time off but it's giving me a lot of time to bond with my baby and learn the ropes.

I will be returning to Tokyo in a few months with baby...I can't wait to see how life will be with her there. Tho I'm still skeptical about the environment / food / water etc.. there.. I need to go back. I need to feel it out for another year and see how our life would be.  Tho I will definately cool down with the partying (as baby can't be in that environment)... I'm hoping to explore new mommy + baby events.. Here is me taking a step UP!  Say hello to maisassyMAMA! HEHE

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