The Cycle of Violence


Dr. Phil says, "The anatomy of an abusive relationship is really very simple. There's a cycle of violence that takes place."

The cycle has three stages:
  • Tension Building Stage
  • Acute Battering Stage
  • Honeymoon Stage
Dr. Phil says of the honeymoon stage, "This is where, 'Oh, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I will never do this again. I hate that this happened. I'll make it up to you. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry,' but then the cycle starts over again."

He notes that nearly half of abusers re-offend, most within the first six months. "And then you've got what's called traumatic bonding, and it's because there's an imbalance of power, and there's an intermittent reinforcement schedule. You never know whether you're going to get hugged or hit. And so psychologically that's a very strong tendency to stay involved in that relationship," says Dr. Phil.

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