The 15 Girls You (Sometimes Unfairly) Resented in High School

Cool Breathless poster.
Universal Pictures

Have you heard that high school is hard for girls? They made a movie about it, once. Looking back, though, you might've been hard on your various high school nemeses, too, like...

1. The popular girl with the flat-ironed hair and sweatpants with "BABY" on the ass who was always telling guys they were "so random." There are only so many times you can overhear that in a day without wanting to fall into a hole.

2. The second-tier popular girl who was best friends with that girl and teased you about your hair. That girl just felt bad about herself. To be fair, though, your hair was probably pretty bad.

3. The girl who "stole" your best friend in junior year. Because you were fully unaware that friends cannot be passively stolen unless they have less than 5 brain cells or are a sack of potatoes.

4. The girl you knew hated you. Just from, like, how she looked at you. And her voice. And like—her body language. (In other words, you had zero basis to think this, and it was probably just Bitchy Resting Face before they had a name for it.)

5. The rich girl. Back then, it didn't matter how nice she was. She could afford to hire scientists to genetically engineer a Pegacorn to take her to afterprom, therefore she sucked. P.S.: If you didn't resent the rich girl, you were her.

6. The girl that hung out with all your friends and never invited you along and then you'd obviously pretend not to care in pre-calc when they were whispering about something funny that happened at the mall and laughing WAY too loud. Unless Chris Rock was for sale in Hot Topic and they bought him, nothing that funny happens at the mall.

7. The girl that hung out with all your friends who you couldn't STAND, but you knew avoiding hangouts when she was there would cause unwanted drama.

8. The humblebragger. Oh, you were soooo embarrassed when you messed up the jump in your horseback riding competition but won the blue ribbon anyway? Tell me more about that never.

9. The pretty but vapid and pretentious girl who tricked people into thinking she was smart by hanging a Breathless poster in her room. You were onto her, no matter how many Bright Eyes covers she learned.

10. The girl who smoked weed for the first time before anybody else did and then acted like a know-it-all with a ph.D. in smoking weed. GOD, GET AWAY KAYLA, I KNOW HOW TO PACK A JOINT, I GOOGLED IT.

11. The girl who was so obsessed with getting into an Ivy League school that she would've drugged your Diet Coke, performed a crude operation in the girls' bathroom, and Fed-Ex your spleen to the Dartmouth admissions committee.

12. The girl who cried all the goddamn time and had overprotective parents who blamed it on "inappropriate curriculum material." True story from my high school: A dog died in a Jack London story, and one of the girls in my class was so sad that her parents demanded it be taken off the syllabus. (To be replaced, probably, with the shooting script of The Little Mermaid.)

13. The fake "one of the guys" girl who eventually hooked up with everyone's boyfriend. Later to become the Gillian Flynn Cool Girl archetype from Gone Girl.

14. The gorgeous girl who acted like it was totally effortless when it obviously wasn't. Come on, we all know you woke up at 6 a.m. to diffuse your hair.

15. Yourself. Come on—you were, and are, pretty awesome. Hopefully you know that now.

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