Saturday, April 29, 2017

Four Ways Dogs are More Advanced than Humans

**My little buddy**

I was watching The Dog Whisperer on TV this morning with my favorite four-legged friend on my lap, one of my favorite things to do on a Saturday morning. As I watched, it occurred to me that we can learn a lot from dogs, and I'm not just saying that because I'm a dog lover. Here are four ways dogs are simply more advanced than humans:

1) They live in the moment. As far as I know, dogs are not capable of worrying about tomorrow or next week or next year. They also don't seem to wallow in any sort of self-pity about what they should have done in the past. They live totally in the now and seem pretty happy because of it.

2) They don't discriminate against people of different colors, religions, political affiliations, or sexualities. In the rare cases that you do see this occur, it's always because a human trained them to be that way.

3) They have no hang-ups about sex or nudity. It's totally natural for them.

4) They rest when they need to. You don't ever see a dog carrying around their fifth coffee for the day, their eyes bloodshot, because they would rather push through their mile-long to-do list than take a 30-minute nap. When they're tired, they take time to fit in a quick snooze and are healthier for it.

I think we could learn some things from these furry fellas, don't you? ;)


Saturday, April 22, 2017

Three Ways I Help Mother Earth

Happy Earth Day!

Photo by Scarlett Knight

For this Earth Day, I wanted to do a quick post to share with you three specific ways I try to be kind to Mother Earth.

1) I use reusable bags. There really is no excuse to keep using paper or especially that nasty plastic anymore. Almost every major store you go to - grocery stores, retail, even online stores - have reusable shopping bags for sale. It is super easy to get into the habit of taking them with you, and you can even keep one or two in your car for the impromptu shopping trip. This reduces the massive problem we have of all the plastic bags we have out there just floating around, invading the ocean, and just causing an overall mess for the earth.

2) I bring home plastics from restaurants. Many restaurants will use plastic cups to patrons who want to get a drink from the water or soda fountain. I will take the cups with me, along with any other hard plastic that would otherrwise be thrown away, and put it in my recycling bin at home.

3) I put anything and everything in the recycling bin that is allowed to go in there. Especially plastic. If that means taking an extra minute to rinse out milk jugs, I do it. I recycle glass bottles, paper, you name it. It's astounding to see how much just one household with two people and a dog can accumulate in terms of recyclable materials each week. This is trash that would otherwise go to a landfill or be dumped into the ocean. It may not seem like much, but it certainly adds up.

Do you consider yourself a green person? What do you to do help the earth?



Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Happy Birthday, Art House!

To celebrate its publication birthday, here is a short and steamy excerpt from my novel The Art House:

Drinking sometimes caused old feelings to resurface and made unwanted tears fall. It was undeniable, though: ever since this adventure had started, she’d had more than a few reminders of times and people she’d tried for years to forget. She passed a kitchen and several other rooms too large for a bathroom and too dark to really see into. Checking behind elaborate doors, she found a number of closets and staircases but no bathroom. Finally, she found a small restroom and after relieving herself, checked her appearance in the floor-length gold-framed mirror that wasn’t hanging but rather propped against the wall at a stylish angle. She rubbed away the smears of makeup under her eyes and tried to recapture some of that buzz which had leaked out through her tears.

On the way back, she passed one of the doors that had led to a secret spiral staircase. Mistakenly, she must have left it ajar. When she moved to close it, she heard a man groan.

Freezing with her hand on the doorknob, she listened again to make sure she hadn’t just been imagining things. Then it came again, this time with a woman’s muffled moan in erotic harmony. Her pulse beginning to race, she slowly peeked into the stairwell.

It was a couple all right, there at the foot of the stairs. A long blonde-haired woman in a flowing green dress had her skirts gathered up around her as she knelt in front of a man, frantically giving him fellatio. The man’s upper body was cast in shadow, but she could make out his longish dark hair and stubble. His eyes were closed, his face twisted in fervent ecstasy. She didn’t recognize either of them as anyone Trixi had introduced her to.

The woman’s head bobbed back and forth, her hand stroking the man’s hard cock, which he’d pulled through his pants. She seemed to be enjoying the event as much as he was. Janelle knew she should give this couple their privacy, even if they were doing this out in public. It was their moment of passion, not hers. Still, she found herself unable to break away, her breath growing shallow.

The man gasped and muttered “faster” in a desperate, guttural tone. Janelle had a strong desire to reach inside of her soft blouse and pinch her hardening pink nipples beneath the shell of her bra. She looked down, ashamed but fascinated. A burst of movement brought heat to her cheeks as she panicked, fearing she’d been discovered. But it was only the man, pulling the woman up from the floor and positioning her on all fours on the stairs. He lifted her skirts, her underwear already down around one ankle. His erection, barely visible in the shadow, arced up from his body like an arrow.

He plunged into the woman. She groaned, and Janelle bit down on her thumbnail, her sex tingling with the strong sweet scent of her own stimulation. She needed to leave them alone, let them have their moment, but she couldn’t move her feet. Their passion was intoxicating, something real, unlike so many of her relationships of late. She could actually feel their lust, the forbidden rush of this secret act trapping her in place. She kept her hand on the doorknob, the other hand slack at her side, though she desperately longed to touch herself.

“Darling, did you hear something?” the woman asked, and they stopped moving.



Tuesday, April 11, 2017

The Dilemma of the Longsuffering

It seems like in many relationships, whether they're with family members, friends, or romantic partners, there's always one person who is more of a peacekeeper than the other. In healthy relationships, sometimes I can't always tell who is more patient than the other, but in unhealthy, unbalanced relationships, it can be a lot more obvious, even to total strangers.

I've been thinking a lot lately about the quality of being "long-suffering" in relationships and how it hasn't much served me in the long run over the years. Some of us tend to attract more high maintenance personalities than others, and I am one of them. I could go into the whole psychology of why, but that's not really what I want to focus on with this post...

Recently, I found myself at a crossroads with a friend of mine. I had been working with this person for over three years on a personal writing project, and although in my mind I saw us as more friends than business partners, this person ultimately didn't see it that way. I kept allowing this person to call the shots as far as when we'd meet, how often we'd meet, and what we'd talk about when we got together (even if it was the person complaining about the same personal issues over and over again).

I had picked up on little clues over the years that this person has a rather ugly temper, despite being a normally charming human being. But I never imagined actually being on the other end of this temper! Then the phone call happened. After this completely jarring phone conversation in which this person yelled at me, cursed at me, and cut me off because she was feeling "frustrated" with her project, I realized I had officially hit my limit with what I would endure. Long story short, I expressed my displeasure at being spoken to that way, but this person was only able to see her side of the problem. She also couldn't bring herself to apologize because she didn't feel she was wrong. That particular relationship is now over.

Also recently, I found myself enduring subtle jabs and complaints from someone I worked with, and since I had recently had the miserable phone call with the other person that you just read about, the pitfalls of being long-suffering were strong on my mind. I decided that rather than endure this second person's horrible attitude and rudeness toward me, I would call her out on the carpet about it right then. I did so respectfully but also firmly. It was uncomfortable getting into that conflict, but we were able to discuss it as adults, and she saw the error in her ways (or at the very least she respected the fact that her behavior bothered me), and now, she keeps her attitude to a minimum when she's around me. I saved myself from having to deal with that sort of unwanted negativity, and the likelihood of it happening in the future is now minimal.

The problem I've seen, not only with myself but with other people, in letting bullies and/or martyrs get their way is that the manipulative behavior tends to continue. And it continues until it reaches a boiling point. Some people are able to endure it for years, even decades, but there always seems to be a tipping point when the person can take it no longer. Tackling those red flags early on is a way to save people a lot of wasted time.

One reason I have, over the years, allowed people to treat me badly is a lack of courage to stand up for myself. Once I realized that I deserved to have my needs met just as much as the next person, it became a lot easier to speak out instead of remain long-suffering. But it was a long process getting there.

Do you consider yourself a long-suffering type of person? How long does it usually take you to reach the tipping point of putting up with bad behavior?