Why the Right Word Matters

The right word can make your message clear and compelling. Over fifty years later, people are still moved by the dream Martin Luther King Jr. shared. He hoped that one day his children would “not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.” 

Lightning & a Mark Twain quote:

Think how much impact he would have lost if he had asked that they be judged “not by the color of their skin but by the quality of their competence.”

(He could have spoken instead about “the value of their contribution” or “the appeal of their personality.”) Character goes deeper—to the core values a person lives by.

Choosing the right word can help your readers or listeners “see” what you see. It lets them understand why what you’re telling them matters. A different word might not carry the same weight or feeling and could fail to communicate your message.

It’s important to understand the connotations of the words you use to express your core message. That’s why great writers struggle over their word choice. Words have power, and the background of each word contributes to the impact it has. 

In the Declaration of Independence, Thomas Jefferson reworded Locke’s influential idea about the rights to “life, liberty, and property” to “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness His words still affect American thinking about rights.

When you have several words to choose from, it’s worth looking them up if you’re not sure of their connotations. (Connotations are the emotional tone and background of a word—the levels of meaning it has developed over the years.)

Some similar words may arouse very different responses from your readers. You need to recognize words that carry strong emotional undertones along with their basic meaning.

Most of this page will look at 

• some of the ways similar words can differ, and guidelines for choosing the most appropriate ones

examples of (sometimes unexpected) word connotations

• some pages on EnglishHints that compare words for specific purposes

• ways to learn word connotations and to get help choosing the right word for your purpose

Words with Similar Meanings May Have Very Different Effects

Similar words may vary in their formality. Words with old English roots tend to be less formal.  They work well for everyday use but might not be exact enough for some formal writing.

French-based words & especially words with Latin or Greek roots are more formal. (See an excellent Ted Ed video on French vs Old English near the top of the Word Origins page.) 

Some words like slang (or “swear words”—especially words you often see written with asterisks replacing some letters!) are only appropriate in certain settings. If in doubt, don’t—especially at work or in academic settings.

Words with similar definitions may also vary in their emotional charge. (See the connotation examples below.) Some may be positive, others neutral, and still others extremely negative.

Compare relaxed, easy-going, lazy, and shiftless, or prudent, careful, cautious, and timid. Then look at their near-opposites: decisive, bold, assertive, forceful, aggressive, demanding, or pushy. (In all three sets of words I’ve started with the most positive synonym and moved to more negative words on the right.)

Similar words may also vary in their intensity. Planning and intending are more serious than just wanting to do something. Determination is still more intense. Bad experiences can go from unpleasant or uncomfortable to miserable, dreadful, or horrendous.

Often one or two synonyms may work equally well for the thought you're sharing. It's just important to be aware of possible differences in formality, intensity, or connotations. They may make a word just right for your purpose-- or a very poor choice.

Some Examples of Word Connotations

While I was working on this page, I read a Smithsonian article on word use for events of the the American Civil War era. Some scholars “suggest the Compromise of 1850 be more accurately referred to as an Appeasement. The latter word precisely reflects the sway that Southern slaveholders held in the bargain.” 

Compromise implies both sides yielding something to reach an agreement. Appeasement has much more negative connotations. It describes a cowardly surrender rather than fighting for one’s principles.  

‘Argue,’ ‘argument,’ & ‘argumentative’ show the different connotations words can have depending on the context. An argument is not always a hostile discussion. (Consider the expressions “a persuasive argument” or “an eloquent argument.” Both suggest winning over the audience.) 

An argument is often the defense of an idea or plan with the hope of persuading others to see the value of it. The verb ‘argue’ can also refer to a neutral discussion. (“The mayor argued for a new city hall.”) However, the adjective has only unpleasant connotations. Argumentative people constantly disagree with others and insist on their own way. 

Since writing this page I found an article by Inc. making an even more forceful argument about the importance of choosing the right word for your purpose. It explains the crucial, though seemingly small, differences between the words ‘argue,’ persuade’, and ‘convince.’ It suggests that understanding those differences can help you “get what you want in business and life.”

This infographic on 476 Ways to Avoid Saying “Said” shows how many ways English can express similar thoughts. Look at the connotations of words in the second section of that page alone. 

Some describe frivolous speech: babbled, blabbered, nattered, prattled, rattled on, & more. Others are fault-finding: harped, ranted, and sometimes lectured. Some messages lack focus: the speakers digressed, rambled, or trailed off. Others gave formal and boring speeches-- they intoned, lectured, or preached.

That section also listed many words with neutral connotations. These refer to the middle and end of a speech: people resumed, continued, went on, & then concluded, ended, or finished.

When you need just the right word for a sharp, clever answer, you might use ‘retorted.’ 

An unfriendly opponent might bait, mock, provoke, or taunt his adversary. These are all ways of insulting him. Their intention is often to make him lose control and say or do something foolish.

Here’s another example—a discussion of the difference between responding and reacting, which we think of as close synonyms. The article suggests that a reaction is immediate, emotional, and almost unconscious. To respond is to take time to think about what you’ve heard. A thoughtful response is more likely to resolve problems and improve relationships than an automatic, “knee-jerk” reaction.

For still more examples of the differences in connotations between synonyms, see the two sections below. The better you understand the connotations of each word you’re considering, the easier it is to choose the right word for your purpose.

Pages Comparing Related Words 

Several pages on EnglishHints discuss differences in connotation and word use for specific subjects. See 

A Lincoln quote:

Explanation & practice with synonyms for truth, mistakes, & lying.

Picture of a politician speaking in front of flags, with the message:

An explanation of words in favor or opposed to political ideas or parties, verbs for varying levels of disagreement or compromise, political idioms, & more

3 young men working as a team on computers

Differences in meaning for various words for working together, with practice

Social Change Vocabulary gives examples of several kinds of large or small changes, changes for better or worse, & more.

Personality Vocabulary, Vocabulary for Violence, or War Vocabulary also discuss variations in meaning for related words.

Finding the Right Words for Your Needs

So, how do you find the right words in English at the moment you need them? 

The best (though long-term) way to learn English words and their connotations is to read and listen to a variety of English sources. That's especially important in the areas in which you most often speak or write. 

Even if you do that, you will sometimes not be able to think of the exact expression you want at the time you need it. If you’re writing, you can look up a related word and find its synonyms in a good dictionary or thesaurus. (Be sure to double-check the meaning and connotations of any word you’re not quite sure about.) 

If you’re talking to someone, you may have to use the best word that comes to mind, and then look up others later. In some cases, you can follow up with an email afterward to clarify your message. Don’t let it worry you too much! 

Ways to Learn & Find the Best Words

Do you often wish you had a better command of English vocabulary? Do you imagine being able to think of the best word to explain an idea or answer an important question? I’ve had quite a few conversations with non-native English speakers who feel that way. They read and write English well but still get frustrated searching for the right word during an important conversation. 

There are ways (besides reading) to increase your vocabulary and keep it “in the front of your mind.” (That means to keep important words in your active vocabulary. It isn't enough to recognize words if you can't think of them when you need to use them.) One way is to learn word roots, prefixes, and suffixes. Knowing even a few of the most common ones helps you recognize hundreds of English words. That's why I teach so many of them here.  

If you have questions about word use that you can't seem to find answers for, you can ask in the box below. I'll do my best to answer. I'll also be glad to talk if you think you might like some help with your vocabulary. I give one-on-one lessons/coaching on English vocabulary and communication skills. Just let me know below and we can arrange a time.

(I also will be offering an interactive course on that starting in the early fall of 2021. See 30 Days to Better English for more information or to sign up to be notified when it's live.)

Questions or comments? Let me know!


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