Breaking: Country Boys Are Hung

It's not every day you read an article regarding a medical journal and penile size research that includes the words "farm-fed beef." Thank Zeus today is that day.

On MSNBC's The Body Odd, Brian Alexander writes:

In the December issue of the journal Archives of Pediatric and Adolescent Medicine, Bulgarian doctors report results of a 6,200-boy survey showing "a modest though significant difference … with respect to penile size between urban and rural populations." Country boys were born with longer ones and the disparity continued as the boys grew.

The piece (heh) goes on to discuss how perhaps populations in rural areas eat better, how puberty ages are shifting and some other junk (heh) but even more important: What's the best way to pick up a country boy? Here's what I've got:

  • Hey, can you show me how to plow?
  • I hear cowboys love a long hard ride.
  • I'd like to ask you about the size of your corn cob.
  • Want to have a shootout in my OK corral?
  • You like barbecue? Why don't you come over and get your pork pulled.

Just for starters. I'm open to suggestions.

Country Boys Got It Going On, Puberty Study Finds [The Body Odd on]