

AIBU? DS wants to go sledging, I've said no because......

(35 Posts)
januaryjojo Fri 18-Jan-13 13:41:31

He has been suspended from school this week for fighting.

His siblings have all gone to the big hill sledging and he wants to go too and I've said no, he is now sulking in his room, screaming at me that's it not fair hmm .

He is nearly twelve by the way.

It's probably a more effective consequence than the suspension from school.

TeWiSavesTheDay Fri 18-Jan-13 13:44:23

Well done, you did the right thing.

Why was he fighting?

sannaville Fri 18-Jan-13 13:44:29

Hmm I don't know on this one. Fair enough if his siblings still had to go to school then obv no way would I but schools are closed so he would be home anyway and it rarely snows. I'd let him out after tea after he has dulled for a but

sannaville Fri 18-Jan-13 13:44:44

Sulked for a bit!!

Pancakeflipper Fri 18-Jan-13 13:46:01

I think good on you. YANBU.

He can rant all he likes but the suspension from school is a biggie isn't it? And the fun opportunity of sledging with friends - well he might think twice and realise there's consequences to be had.

Katz Fri 18-Jan-13 13:47:07

suspended from school would equal grounded at home too, so therefore no sledging. Once the suspension has been served then the grounded if appropriate would also be lifted.

If it had been nice and the others were going to the park after school would he have been allowed?

LaCiccolina Fri 18-Jan-13 13:48:39

I agree with u if u have suspended all other treats too as part of punishment so ie before snow because if behaviour he lost access to mobile/TV in own room/sweets etc.

If he still had all other treats so to speak and only punishment was just suspension then probs u are bu only because it was the lazier approach to discipline.

I'm guessing u were a rather than b so suspect I'm on ur side...?

januaryjojo Fri 18-Jan-13 13:55:43


Sigh, no idea why he was fighting.....he does it a lot and its never his fault according to him.

This is second (I think?) suspension since September, nothing is ever his fault, he take zero responsibility for anything and is the only child in the entire school who does not get any homework hmm, and the letters from the school re. All of the above are fakes sent to get him into trouble!!!

We have ongoing issues with him........


Oh yes this seems to have effected him more than being suspended, quite frankly he is perfectly happy sitting at home doing school work from the school website on the netbook.

BeanJuice Fri 18-Jan-13 14:00:48


januaryjojo Fri 18-Jan-13 14:01:48


Absolutely, tv in bedroom is gone, Xbox is gone, Xbox games gone, access to his netbook for school work only. And I check the history to make sure.
No mobile phone.

Front room tv is off all day too.

Suspension isn't a punishment for him, it's a punishment for me. Or at least that's how it feels.

McNewPants2013 Fri 18-Jan-13 14:03:05


SkinnybitchWannabe Fri 18-Jan-13 14:03:48

YADNBU There's no way I'd let my son go out if he'd been suspended..stick to your guns and don't give in at all

TroublesomeEx Fri 18-Jan-13 14:03:51


Although it sounds like there might be more going on for him if he's happy to do school work from the school website whilst he's on suspension.

Have you spoken to school about him?

januaryjojo Fri 18-Jan-13 14:09:06


Hi, yes, we've had meetings with school and ed psych, everything just moves very slowly........

He appears to have gone quiet...........

Cherriesarelovely Fri 18-Jan-13 14:10:49

Well done OP. You are doing exactly the right thing in showing him how seriously you take his suspension

Inaflap Fri 18-Jan-13 14:12:27

As a teacher, can I just say that I wish there were more parents like you. You are doing the right thing but I would let him go out adter school officially finishes.

TroublesomeEx Fri 18-Jan-13 14:17:59

Well it sounds like you're doing everything you can do then - including taking the suspensions seriously.

I think I would agree with Inaflap though and let him go out when the school day officially ends. He needs to keep up with his friends and let off some steam too.

LaCiccolina Fri 18-Jan-13 16:41:10

I can't think of a damn thing else u can do either. Apart from talking. And I doubt he's interested in that.....?

Reaa Fri 18-Jan-13 16:45:46

You have done the right thing smile

TidyDancer England Fri 18-Jan-13 16:48:00

You have absolutely done the right thing. No doubt at all.

freddiefrog Fri 18-Jan-13 16:52:49


Suspension from school would earn a grounding at least from me

freddiefrog Fri 18-Jan-13 16:53:47

Sod it, posted to soon

Suspension from school would earn at least a grounding from me, so they wouldn't be going out whatever the reason

CremeEggThief Brazil Fri 18-Jan-13 17:00:07

Yep, YANBU. He deserves it!

StuntGirl Fri 18-Jan-13 17:11:24

Suspension would equal grounding here too, so YANBU. I hope you can get to the bottom of his behaviour problems soon.

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