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a middle aged white suburban woman who devotes herself WAY too much to her kids to make up what she couldnt suceed when she was a kid. they usually drive big ass SUVs, or mini vans and participate in numerous school activities, such as soccer, parties, fund raiser, sports events, PTA, and other school events. they are usually chaperones to every school field trip, and never leave their kids unattended. after school, they usually force their kids into after school activities, like karate, baseball, choir, and shit like that. they rather their kids do an activity over an actual job, and they volunteer them for community service when they didnt even do nething wrong. these kids cant make descisions on their own, and their fathers who are never present on the subject, are never around. these kids cant play video games that have a good theme or story plot, violence, magic, or nething fun. basically, nothing thats rated E+10 and above. the only music they can listen to is radio disney and classical, no movies that are rated above PG, and they probably never heard of the word known as "the internet". they are to attend church service every sunday and hafta particpate in choir and such. basically, these kids arent free from their soccer moms till their sophmore year of high school, and even then their mom chaperones the prom.

frankly, by puberty, mommy's "little angels" are spoiled rotten, and they can never rule out that Jimmy and Stephanie are selling crack and having orgies at a unchaperoned party instead of attending the pep rally.

in adult hood, these kids will probably be atheist and wont let their kids go newhere near their grandma.
a soccer mom's kid is doomed to never think for themselves and have their minds warped by their mom's to become actors, lawyers, professional athletes, and doctors.
by gunslingergirlvy_c_e January 29, 2006
92 16
A middle aged woman who is still trying to be the prep they were when they were kids. They try to hide everything from their "beautiful precious children" and anything that isn't christian is satanic. The children are not allowed to be individual, oh goodness no!!! And of course, they have big honkin' SUVs. And they wear sweatpants. Oh. My. Gosh.
Me: *listening to Nirvana*

Soccer Mom: Please turn that atrocious music down, there are CHILDREN present!!!

Me: *turns it up*

Soccer Mom: OMYGOSH HOW DARE YOU, MY CHILD IS CORRUPTED BY YOUR MISBEHAVIOUR I'M GONNA CALL THE POLICE and did you know that my child is an honor student??

Me: *turns up music some more* Shut up bitch.
by huntergreen February 02, 2005
729 106
A Soccer Mom is a dumb, ignorant, upper middle class cunt who tries to give the impression that she is from the upper class. The main identifications of Soccer Mom's are a huge coffee, those stupid short jackets that are meant for chicks in their 20's, an attitude of entitlement and bitchness, and an SUV that rivals the fuel consumption and handling of a tank.

Other characteristics include a huge butt shoehorned into jeans meant for slim chicks in their 20's, rampant materialism, probably racist, some type of hardcore conservative. This is basically a grown up version of the college slut who was a general bitch to everyone.

Her children are known as "Mindy" and "Biff". Mindy is the dumb airheaded slut who has the same attitude of entitlement. Mindy is usually dressed up in tight pants that cause butt suffocation, and some kind of tank-top. Biff is the wannabe tough guy frat boy who is probably racist, spits everywhere, and has a chip on his shoulder. Eventually, another type of Mindy meets another type of Biff and the cycle continues.

Soccer mom's can be seen speeding up the apocalypse by encouraging armed conflict in a world where the vast majority of nations have nuclear weapons, yelling at people to get their way, glaring at me because I look like an Arab, so I must be trying to take over the world or something, hating minorities, drinking coffee, and being a general pain in the ass.
The Soccer Mom is the dumb cunt with the huge butt standing in line in front of you at a coffeeshop, yelling at the poor overworked waitstaff that they forgot to add mocha to her half-caf, splenda, mocha, vanilla latte. In addition, they also forgot to smile.
by Clip June 13, 2006
569 120
A woman who refuses to believe that anything that is not white christian middle-upper class is evil. Political correctness and purification of youth is the prime goal of this group. These "dress and act like we are 20 even though we all know we are double that age" sufferers are often found destroying the sacred enviornment in their oversized SUV's driving in an unsafe fashion, often times with cell phones in one hand and a Starbucks coffee in the other.
Tipper Gore.
by Mike Truitt June 10, 2003
527 103
1. A novelty political demographic denoting white middle and upper-middle class suburban American mothers of the post-baby boom generation.
2. Women of said generation who for the most part rejected the female liberationist politik of the 70's and instead chose to define themselves through the role of homemaker and caregiver in the contemporary American family. Is differentiated from the more stereotypical "June Cleaver" of the Eisenhower-era nuclear family, however, in that "soccer moms" are as likely to be married as divorced, and generally have more progressive views on women's lib issues like abortion rights, etc. The term "soccer mom" references the role that these women have expanded on as homemakers, that of organizer and supporter of their children's athletic recreation, most significantly in their endorsement of their daughters onto traditionally male-dominated sport. Nevertheless, "soccer moms" cannot be adequately represented as being part of either a progressive or reactionary socioeconomic scheme; rather, they are something of a necessary evil of the post-industrial bourgeoisie, providing no real solutions for the problems that face contemporary life.
Soccer moms are disliked by the American right because they think they voted for Clinton, and disliked by the American left because they think they voted for Bush.
by Anastasia Suckemsilly December 16, 2003
455 72
an evil underground network of overprotective 30-40 yearolds who dirve around in s.u.v's or minie vans or volvo's who hate tv, internet and teenagers. this "mafia" of soccer momsknows everything that goes on in your town and gossips about every little thing that other peoples kids do.
soccer moms must die
by milo March 09, 2004
440 74
They name their children Madison, Britney, Caitlyn, Tanner, Bryce, Trevor... they drive an SUV or minivan embossed with soccer ball decals and honor student bumper stickers... their two most prized possessions: their cell phone and their sport water bottle... their husbands are never around, either at work or playing golf... they live in a constant state of suspicion of anyone "different" or not from their neighborhood (which usually is gated to keep those other people out).
They and they alone have made the lamentable Kidz Bop series a huge success and consequently are raising social retards who when they finally are "free" and off to college, will become drunken frat boys and/or slutty sorority girls.
The soccer moms of River Place subdivision gathered at Starbucks to discuss the growing problem of suspicious-looking Hispanic lawn crews prowling up and down their streets. Molly suggested that they discuss the issue with the HOA, to which Cindy said, "Good idea! Maybe we can make a rule requiring all Hispanics who come to our neighborhood be required to pass a background check."
They all loved this idea and toasted Cindy with their frozen lattes.
by Tom Fool May 24, 2007
399 63
Annoying bitch who stays at home to clean. She picks up here kids at school every day to lug them of to some kind of sports practice. She uses the v-chip,ESRB, and movie ratings as a tool to make sure her kids don't hear any "language" or see any violence. Internet is a "no-no" other than going on kiddie learning games websites for 30 minutes a day. If someone says "an inappropriate word" near her kids while she is with them, she will quickly cover their ears. She usually drives an SUV with a bumper sticker like "My Child is an Honor Student at ________ Elementary School", but no one cares if your little bitch of a child is an honor student. She only let's her kids listen to Oldies music or Christian "Family" Music. She makes sure to drive real slow as she wants to protect her precious angels who still sit in a carseat at age 9. bHer husband is usually a doctor, realtor, or some other money-making job.
Soccer Moms need to seriously tone down the "family" thing.
by rapsux March 16, 2005
378 59