SpongeBob SquarePants

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SpongeBob SquarePants, a show full of happiness and rainbows.
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article very remotely related to SpongeBob SquarePants.
~ Gary on SpongeBob

SpongeBob SquarePants (often referred to simply as SpongeBob, Spongebob Squarepants, Spongebob, SpongeBob Squarepants, or The Spongebob Squarepants Show, starring Spongebob Squarepants) is an animated children's television series about the everyday life of various undersea creatures which, for some reason, includes a squirrel. The show has sparked much SpongeBob-themed merchandise, including everything from boxer shorts to toilet paper. It is currently the most popular show on Nick, which isn't saying much.


SpongeBob SquarePants


As you can clearly see, his pants are not square.

Is Bob really a sponge?


Are his pants really square?


Patrick's most intelligent face.

Patrick Star

Main article: Patrick Star


Squidward Tentacles

Main article: Squidward Tentacles


Sandy Cheeks

Main articles: Sandy and Cheeks

Sandy Cheeks (formerly known as Sandra Shotgun Shooter the Kid) is a squirrel who moved underwater because she had no friends on land, and also because she is a wanted Texas outlaw. Government agents are currently scarring the entire American continent to find her. Their fear of sharks has given Sandy the advantage to hide out under the sea. Once in Bikini Bottom, she changed her identity to become the cowgirl/scientist in a spacesuit that we all know her as today.

Mr. Krabs

Main articles: Mr. and Krabs



Main article: Plankton

Sheldon J. Plankton is a one-eyed cockroach whose ultimate goal in life is to obtain the Krabby Patty secret formula (sometimes to rule the world or something else irrelevant) so customers will actually give a crap to eat at his restaurant. Especially since his chum tastes like the stuff that comes out of a camel's anus. The writers try their best to depict him as a villain when he is actually a loser whose family is a bunch of rednecks, constantly forgets to blink, and has basically wasted much of his life foiling his own plans and being repeatedly stomped and sat on. Because of this, he is forced to live in a bucket all alone with a talking computer which is supposed to be his wife.

Spongebob Characters

Everyone else

Main article: Everyone else

Everyone else includes the rest of the major characters, such as Gary, Pearl, and Mrs. Puff, and as well as other minor characters that are so unimportant that they don't even have original names, such as Tom and Fred. Everyone else has appeared in more episodes than all of the main characters combined and had several hundred cameos in the SpongeBob SquarePants Movie. Despite these achievements, a recent poll revealed that Everyone else is the least popular SpongeBob character, so unpopular, in fact, that it wasn't even included in the poll.

Locations in the show

Bikini bottom is a cultural wastland that is devoid of any sense of responibility, civic duty, or morality. There is a general consensus amoung experts that bikini bottom is indeed an underwater town with a modest poplation of about 15,000 fish-people. Despite its moral bankruptsy it has a thriving economy and thus has many noteworthy buisness venues and private estates.

Spongebob's pineapple

Spongebob's place of residence is a pineapple that has long since passed it's experation date. The wall are very slimy and sea-yeast have caused the pineapple to rot and ferment. The Bikini Bottom department of health has tried to condemn the dump but the investigators have never returned.

The Krusty Krab

Spongebob's work place, the resteraunt serves fried food and it's owner Mr. Krabs is the only sea creature in town with the means to obtain ground beef. It has a history of health violations but has some how managed to stay open.

Criticism and controversy


Like The Simpsons, Spongebob was a once-awesome show that rapidly declined in quality. From 1999 to 2004, SpongeBob was often praised for its realism, adult humor, and morals. However, after The Spongebob SquarePants Movie, Stephen Hillenburg and most of the writers left for other projects, so Nickelodeon hired a college drunk named Paul Tibbitt to run the show. Tibbitt hired assembled a team of circus chimps consisting of Casey Alexander, Zeus Cervas, Luke Brookshire, and Mike Bell to write the new episodes. Spongebob soon became an unfunny, childish, homosexual time waster with poorly-plotted episodes. One of the chimps also mauled and killed SpongeBob's voice actor, explaining why the main character now has a higher-picted, squeakier voice. Much of the show's older audience stopped watching it, leaving three-year olds, people with mental problems, and emos as its only viewers.


Sponge christmas
The SpongeBob Nativity Scene. Available at Target.



  1. or maybe it's a cat, or a meowing snail, or a blue cat with a shell, or...
  2. After all, Squidward lives in a head.
  3. For more information on Used Napkin's successful music career, see his biography on Spongepedia, the free encyclopedia.

See Also

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SpongeBob SquarePants is part of Uncyclopedia's series on Mass Media.

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