Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Pray for the continued health of Kim John-Il

Kim Jong-Il, North Korean dictator, love child of Elvis Presley and Lyle Lovett, and star of one of my all time favorite movies "Team America - World Police".... may have achieved room temperature by now. We need to remember The Dear Leader and his family in our prayers.

Yes, it might be time to put a morgue tag on his toe. We just don't know. A secretive bunch, those North Koreans.

There was a big parade Tuesday, and Kim missed it. This is unusual, since the man does love to review his parades, and his absence was enough to start the rumors. No one in the west has any idea what will happen to North Korea if the rumors of The Dear Leader's dirt nap are true. The country has had no clear succession plan in place ever since Kim's son - Kim Jong Nam - recently disgraced the family name by trying to sneak into Japan with a forged passport.

It was the only way he was ever going to see Tokyo Disneyland.

(Some people think I make this stuff up. That really is what happened. I promise. He wanted to go to Disneyland.)

The larger reason for our prayerful concern involves the rest of the planet. Since splitting from Democratic/Capitalist South Korea sixty years ago, North Korea has dealt with continual famine and malnutrition. South Korea, of course, has embraced the Free Market and is now a major player in the world economy.

Check out this photograph showing South Korea and North Korea at night:

Look at the lights in South Korea, as compared to the blessings of darkness in their northern socialist neighbor. Can you believe the utter selfishness of South Korea? Do they have any idea what a carbon footprint like that is doing to our world temperatures ????

Almost all North Korean industry and manufacturing enterprises are owned and tightly controlled by the government of Kim Jong-Il. North Korea's low carbon footprint per citizen is rivaled only by that of certain African nations. Who knows what could happen to the North Korean economy if Kim really has joined Mao and Marx in the next plane of existence?

Therefore, I ask that you all pray for The Dear Leader's continued health. It's not just for North Korea. It's for the planet.

Pictures from here and here and here.


Anonymous said...

Unbelievable. Totally disrespectful and just... unbelievably ignorant and stupid.

Why are you being so critical about South Korea when this about about North Korea, being so "selfish" and harmful to the environment??

1. They're separate countries! Take a look at the USA and Mexico - Is the USA being "selfish" since Mexico is doing so badly commpared to the USA? No, USA is being USA. Sure, it's called "South KOREA", but since the division, there is no country called "Korea" - they are two fully separate countries, as much as Mexico/USA.

2. Harmful to the environment... Yeah, like any other developed nation! If you want to deal with environmental issues, deal with USA's first, because USA's THE best at harming the environment, second to none.

Shouldn't you be rather PRAISING South Korea, for working with Americans (and the global community) in its early ages to be the successful/prosperous nation it is now?

No need to blast your allies! What is wrong with you?

The Whited Sepulchre said...

Have you never heard of irony???

Christalmighty, I was trying to sound like an environmentalist whackjob ! !