Ask Amy

Sunday, August 5, 2012 at 9:05pm

DEAR AMY: A little over a year ago, I contracted Lyme disease. It has been an extremely tough time, health-wise.


She said we were boring together and things just didn't click for her. I tried to tell her that the fatigue, nausea, neurological problems, etc., are so debilitating at times it's hard to function in a normal relationship. I guess I was boring because I was so ill.


I just can't seem to get over her. When we were together she was the kindest, most loving person and I love her deeply.

I'm depressed that I met her when I was so sick. I believe you meet the love of your life only once in a lifetime. I know if I hadn't been sick she would feel the same way, but I just wasn't any fun to be around. Can you help?

— Once Bitten

DEAR BITTEN: You believe that you meet the love of your life once in a lifetime. Even if this is true (I don't believe so), the matter of identifying who is the love of your life gets tricky.


The character question comes up when someone dumps a man because he's ill but says it's because he's boring.




DEAR AMY: I'm a 71-year-old recently retired physician. I have a former patient who has had numerous instabilities in his life.

I must have given him my email address years ago. He wants to be my friend. I don't. I guess I set myself up for this by being his friendly physician during office visits.

How do I extricate myself? I know this is about boundaries, and I know I need to set them, but I'm reaching out for help.

I could say, "Now that I have left the practice, I choose to set up boundaries, etc." Does this sound like a good idea?

— Retired Doc in Minneapolis

DEAR DOC: You did not "set yourself up for this" by being a friendly physician. Your former patient might be someone who simply doesn't understand or respect professional and social cues, which could be a factor in his unstable life.

Respond to an email from him by saying, "In my retirement, I'm no longer available to communicate with former patients. Here is a referral to a physician who I believe has openings in his practice to see new patients. I wish you all the best."


DEAR AMY: I don't agree with your response to "No Vacation," the mom with the bratty 17-year-old son who would not go on a final family vacation.

The response from my wife and me would have been, "You don't ask a 17-year old to go on vacation; you tell them that they're going." Period.


— Vacationing Dad



Filed under: Lifestyles
Tagged: ask amy