Archive for October, 2016

Sunday Jokes

Posted in America, Britain, British Humour, Canada, England, European Union, News, Obama, Politics, UK with tags , , , , on 23/10/2016 by floroy1942


A young Arkansan boy goes off to college. Half way through the semester, having foolishly squandered all of his money on his girlfriend, he calls home. “Dad,” he says, “You won’t believe what modern education is developing! They actually have a program here at Hendrix that will teach our dog, Ole’ Blue how to talk!”  “That’s amazing,” his dad says. “How do I get Ole’ Blue in that program?” “Just send him over here with $1,000” the young Arkie says “and I’ll get him in the course.”  So, his father sends the dog and $1,000.

About two-thirds of the way through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy calls home. “So how’s Ole’ Blue doing son?” his father asks.  “Awesome, dad, he’s talking up a storm,” he says, “but you just won’t believe this — they’ve had such good results they have started to teach the animals how to read!” “Read!?” says his father, “No kidding! How do we get Blue in that program?”  “Just send $2,500, I’ll get him in the class.”

The money promptly arrives. The Arkie and his girlfriend are able to buy enough marijuana to last the whole semester. But our hero has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk, nor read. Even though he was always pretty much able to lie his way out of trouble, the Arkie asked his girlfriend to help him think of a really good lie to tell his dad. She very quickly came up with a plan for him. So she has him shoot the dog.

When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited.  “Where’s Ole’ Blue? I just can’t wait to see him read something and talk!” “Dad,” the boy says, “I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Ole’ Blue was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal, like he usually does”. “Then Ole’ Blue turned to me and asked, so, is your daddy still messing around with that little redhead who lives down the street?” The father went white and exclaimed, “I hope you shot that lying damn dog before he talks to your mother!”  “I sure did, Dad!” “That’s my boy!”

 The kid married his girlfriend, they both went on to law school in Fayetteville, he became Governor of Arkansas and President of the United States, and you already know what a lying bitch his girlfriend turned out to be!


So a man dies, goes to Heaven, and sees St. Peter. There are many clocks surrounding him so the man asks, “What are these clocks for?” St. Peter replies, “These are lie clocks, they tick once for every lie you tell. Here we have Mother Teresa’s clock. She has never lied so the clock has not moved. Honest Abe has only lied twice in his life, so it has only ticked twice.” The man then asks, “So where is George Bush’s clock?” St. Peter replies, “Oh, that is in Jesus’ office, he is using it as a ceiling fan!”


How can you tell when a brunette is actually a blonde who dyes her hair? When she trips over the cordless phone.

So I asked a blonde, “Which is closer, Florida or the Sun?” She said, “The Sun, because I can look up and see it.


It was a baby mosquito’s first day to fly out from home. When the mosquito came back home later that day, the father mosquito asked, “How was your journey?” The baby mosquito replied, “It went great. Everyone was clapping for me!”


Travelling through the country, an old couple drives into a gas station. The attendant asks the old man, “Where you folks from? I know everybody in this town.” The old man says, “We’re from Nebraska.” Hard of hearing, the old lady nudges her husband, “What did he say, papa?” The old man answers her, “He asked us where we are from.” “Oh,” replies the old woman. The old man tells the attendant to fill up the tank and check the tires. When that’s all done, the attendant tells the old man, “You know, the worst piece of ass I ever had was from Nebraska.” The old lady nudges her husband once more and asks, “What did he say, papa?” The husband replies, “He thinks he knows you, mama.”


Two nuns from Ireland come to tour New York City. Before they come, they hear that Americans eat dogs, so they both agree to try it when they arrive. As they’re walking around New York, they hear, “Hot Dogs! Get your hot dogs!” They rush over to get one! As the first nun opens hers, her face turns white and she gasps, “What part did you get?!”




‘Til next time.


An Increased Threat To Europe

Posted in America, Britain, European Union, Germany, Immigrants, Islamic State, Muslim, News, Terrorists, UK with tags , , , , on 20/10/2016 by floroy1942
Coming To A Town Near You?

Coming To A Town Near You?

The battle for Mosul rages on, and with the overwhelming forces attacking the city it is only a matter of time before it is overrun. But what of the aftermath? As the fight reaches its climax and ISIS are close to defeat we will be faced with a major dilemma.

The surviving members of ISIS have only to throw down their weapons and behave as citizens of the city and they will be free to do as they please. It turns out that many hold European passports, and a theory has been put forward that these people will head home to Europe once the fighting is over. So what happens then?

Could it be they will rejoin their families and go back to their normal lives, or will they continue with their jihad on European soil? Considering how fanatical these people are the second choice seems much more likely. We could even find some of them entering Britain.

The possibility exists that we could be entering a new phase of the war against these animals, for we already know that many jihadists have entered Europe disguised as refugees. Were they to join together we could see a wave of attacks in our cities and towns like never before.

Food for thought!


Who To Choose – Trump Or Clinton?

Posted in America, Britain, Canada, Elections, Environment, European Union, News, Nuclear Weapons, Obama, President with tags , , , , on 18/10/2016 by floroy1942

Clinton Versus TrumpThis article may ruffle a few feathers among Americans, especially as I do not live in the USA, but the question is a valid one. Which candidate would you choose as President of the United States of America? On the one hand we have Hilary Clinton, and on the other business man Donald Trump. To be perfectly honest I would not choose either of them, for neither one is honest enough to hold the post.

So far as Hilary is concerned there is the scandal of her e-mails while she was Secretary of State, plus the scandals surrounding her and her husband while he was President. Plus their Clinton Foundation shenanigans. There is of course much more hiding under the table.

So far as Trump is concerned he has made himself unpopular with women because of secret recordings made while he made jokes about women and the many allegations of rape made against him from women who have suddenly come forward after staying silent for many years. On top of this there are his many failures in business which are steadily becoming public knowledge.

To be completely honest, I think that neither of them are fit for the most powerful post in the world, i.e. President of the United States.

In the last few elections for this post there has been mudslinging one against the other, but neither candidate has laid out how they would run the country. This was always the main focus of attention by prospective nominees in the distant past, but that has disappeared in the more recent elections.

Obama and Mitt Romney fought like cats and dogs, slandering each other and not concentrating on how they would run the country, and the same is true now. The Presidential Election has become a ‘no holds barred’ fight between the two candidates and whoever manages to drag up the most dirt about their opponent wins. This is not the way to run an election for the Presidency.

It would be nice if each candidate laid out the plans they have for running the country, and how they would coöperate with foreign powers. The people should be more interested in how they would serve the public and make their lives better. But it seems that this approach is history as we delve more and more into ‘in-fighting’ between the candidates.

The position of President of the United States is the most powerful in the world, and those who hold it should be concentrating on making lives better and paving the way for true peace in the world, but with these two candidates that will never happen. Clinton is only interested in making herself and her husband richer at the expense of the people, while Trump is only out for fame and fortune.

How will they treat Russia? Will they enter into negotiations to lift the threat of war that is currently hovering over the world? How will they treat the catastrophe that has overtaken the Middle East? What will they do in America to battle the increasing contamination of our atmosphere. How will they improve the living standards of the American people? All of these subjects have not even entered their heads for they say nothing about how they would act as President. All they do is concentrate on mudslinging.

All I can say is, God help us all if either of these two get into power.


Are We Edging Closer To War With Russia?

Posted in America, Britain, European Union, Islamic State, News, Nuclear Weapons, Politics, Royal Air Force, Russia, Terrorism with tags , , , , on 14/10/2016 by floroy1942

I read a somewhat alarming report on the internet yesterday that says RAF planes have been given the ‘go-ahead’ to shoot down Russian jets over Syria if they are endangered by them.

RAF Tornado Fighter Bomber

RAF Tornado Fighter Bomber

The RAF Tornado aircraft have now been armed with air-to-air missiles, and the pilots have been given the green light to defend themselves if they are ‘threatened’ by Russian pilots.

An unidentified source from the U.K’s Permanent Joint Headquarters Said, “The first thing a British pilot will do is to try to avoid a situation where an air-to-air attack is likely to occur — you avoid an area if there is Russian activity, but if a pilot is fired on or believes he is about to be fired on, he can defend himself. We now have a situation where a single pilot, irrespective of nationality, can have a strategic impact on future events.”

Both sides are supposed to be attacking ISIS but it would seem from the report that Russia is spending a lot of its time attacking opponents of Assad. It is clear they have an agreement with Assad, and consider him to be the leader of all Syria, even though he is a despot. The West meanwhile is concentrating on ISIS and wants to wipe them out.

UK defence officials said: “It took six days for Russia to strike any Isis targets at all. Their air strikes have included moderate opposition groups who have been fighting to defend their areas from ISIS. Among the targets hit were three field hospitals.”

Russian Sukhoi Su-24 Fighter Bomber

Russian Sukhoi Su-24 Fighter Bomber

Meanwhile, the Russians insist they have been attacking ISIS and have recently destroyed  “53 fortified areas and strong points with armament and military hardware, seven ammunition depots, four field camps of “terrorists”, one command centre, and artillery and mortar batteries.”

The disparity between the claims needs to be cleared up for it is impossible to say who is telling the truth. It is clear that the situation between Russia and the West is getting steadily worse and it only needs one plane to be shot down by the other side and we could find ourselves in a full scale war.

The Russians want Assad in control of the country for he has offered them military bases. They are clearly supporting him in this war against terrorism because when the fighting is over they will have permanent military bases on the Mediterranean coast.

The Caption Says It All

The Caption Says It All

With all this bickering we are slowly getting closer and closer to a full blown war between the West and Russia. If that happens we can say goodbye to humanity on this planet, for it only takes one person to ‘push the button’ and the skies would be full of nuclear missiles. If that happens mankind would be finished on this Earth.


Car Recall Scandal

Posted in America, Britain, England, European Union, Germany, Modern World, News, People's Rights, Theft, Traffic with tags , , , , on 13/10/2016 by floroy1942

Car manufacturers are failing their customers in a steady stream these days, as we see today that Toyota recalls some 340,000 brand new Prius Hybrid cars for problems with the brakes. This is one of a long stream of recalls over the past five years from almost every manufacturer on the planet. Volkswagen, Ford, Citroen and General Motors among many others have had to recall vehicles because of major faults.

Why is this happening? Years ago you could trust a new car to be totally safe and reliable, but now? What is it with these manufacturers that cause this?

In my view it is cost cutting to make more profit, but it is having the reverse effect as the repairs are costing these companies millions. People are spending a huge amount of money to buy a new car, and yet each time it is a lottery whether the car will be recalled at some future date because of a major problem, if it doesn’t kill you first.

Because of these problems people are dying, and it’s not always certain that their relatives get any compensation from the companies involved.

Years ago you could buy anything from a screwdriver to a car and know that it will last you for years, but these days manufacturers like to build in a ‘life limit’ on things produced today. That of course ensures that within a certain period you will be forced to go out and buy a new one. More money for them!

It is without doubt a sad indictment of our times when manufacturers only think of profit and never quality. But let’s face it, almost everyone is at it these days.


The Pokomon Frenzy

Posted in America, Britain, England, European Union, Insanity, Mobile Phone, Modern World, News, Police, Teens with tags , , , , on 09/10/2016 by floroy1942
Playing While Driving - You could Kill Someone

Playing While Driving – You Could Kill Someone

I couldn’t believe what I read the other day about a Pokomon player waltzing into a stranger’s house. When questioned by the Police he said he was playing Pokomon and searching for monsters. This is not an isolated case for it has happened before.

There have been nineteen such incidents in Norfolk England alone in the past few weeks. The Police have registered assaults, driving offences, noise nuisance and thefts in July and August alone.

What is it with these fanatics who think they can do as they please just because they are playing a game on their mobile? Have our youth lost all sense of reason over a stupid game?

The Police have arrested people driving erratically while playing the game and it makes me wonder how long it will be before someone gets killed.


Why Is Britain Outsourcing Contracts?

Posted in America, Britain, England, European Union, Government Spending, News, Politics, Royal Navy, UK, USA with tags , , , , on 07/10/2016 by floroy1942

Is the UK government going mad or what? I have read over the last year of major manufacturing projects being outsourced to foreign companies by the dozen. Looking for the cheapest option is not always a good thing, and it is killing our own manufacturing industry. Our steel industry was sold off to Tata, an Indian company some years ago, but why? I guess it was so the original directors and owners could make a handsome profit.

Our own steel industry is in dire straits having lost thousands of jobs over the past two years, and yet there is no help from the government. This loss of jobs was due to the government buying the cheap, state-subsidised Chinese steel.

Take for example the Hinkley Point nuclear plant that is being built. Why outsource it to France? Are our engineers not capable of building a nuclear power station? Why are we buying steel from China when our own steel industry is collapsing? If the contracts had been awarded to our own companies it would have saved thousands of jobs, and perhaps our steel industry as a whole.

And now yet another idiotic decision has been made by allowing France to supply the steel used to build a major part of our next fleet of nuclear submarines! A contract has been signed with French group Industeel to supply the steel used to build the pressure hull of our new Trident replacement.

In years gone by we had the greatest manufacturing industry in Europe but this has been whittled away by successive governments. Even our trains and busses are manufactured in Germany among many other things, and for what?

British manufacturing is slowly being strangled by so many contracts being given to foreign country’s. It is time the government did something to try and save our manufacturing  companies, for otherwise the entire industry will collapse completely. I live in hope that things will change – soon.


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