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The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

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for flowerbeds are like conversational death traps
children of dune - leto 1
Personal and cultural awareness thought, via FFA:
I was a cultural awareness class (nothing to do with Poles specifically) that had an example of the 'spaces' differences leading people awry. There was a hotel that had people constantly falling into their flower beds, till they investigated some and found out that it apparently occurred when persons accustomed to wide space interaction and persons accustomed to small space interaction met. The wide space people backed away to get more space and the small space people kept following to maintain the close connect. Eventually the wide space people ended up in the flower beds. - Nonny, FFA

I'm trying to decide if I'm Person Who Falls Into Flowerbed or Person Who Pursues Person Into Flowerbed and it's a toss-up. I think I would be Falls-Into-Flowerbed, but social anxiety can and does nail me into position every so often (it's random) where an earthquake wouldn't move me and you might crawl in my lap (not that I'm against this) and I won't move to save my life.

I'm also from the South, so I'm used to small space interaction to the point I have no idea if I naturally like it only that my body automatically assumes that position and God help me. The South (or Texas) also has the time-honored tradition of gossiping at the correct decibel so the person beside you (ie Gossip Subject) cannot hear, so there's that.

Currently, I'm breaking into hysterical laughter at the idea of watching this in action at this hotel. It's like everyone's in an unwitting horror movie lead-up, and half of them don't realize they're Michael Meyers slow-stalking the person who has no idea they're the latest victim until flowerbed dive.

So are you Flowerbed Michael Meyers or Flowerbed Victim One (or are you the Flowerbed of Retreat??????)? It's Friday and I literally cannot think of anything more useful to do with my time than get an answer to this pressing question.

Posted at Dreamwidth: http://seperis.dreamwidth.org/1009805.html. | You can reply here or there. | comment count unavailable comments

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In New York it's person who ends up getting edged off the sidewalk and into storefronts. Which I'm sure I would be if I didn't avoid people, mostly.

Walking in New York, I will choose the collision with the person over the collision with the inanimate object every time. Less painful to bump into someone than to get bounced into a bike rack.

I'm definitely a pursuer. There have been times during a noisy cocktail hour where I've stepped closer to the person I'm talking to because I'm having difficulty hearing them, and then they step away from me, which is endlessly frustrating. Look, you have two choices: talk at an appropriate decibel level for the environment, or stand closer.

I'm Flowerbed Victim One, myself, but I've actually noticed this effect consciously and developed countermeasures. If someone's scooting up on me, I turn slightly, setting my torso at about a 45-degree angle away. This lets me reclassify them as being in the space next to me, which allows a closer distance, while still letting them classify me as facing them because I still have my face turned towards them.

If a stranger is scooting up on me in a line, I turn a full 90 degrees. If they scoot up on me still further, I lean away but keep my back foot in place. Bumping into the back foot stops the scooting, makes them aware of the personal space they're invading, and usually gets me a minor apology.



Someone who is your opposite! THIS IS LIKE A CUTE-MEET ACROSS PLATFORMS!

I'm not sure whether to laugh hysterically or hang my head. That's amazing.

The spacial thing is different for different cultures. We tried it on one of my friends from Mexico and they ended up following me all over the room. It's actually good to know since one might think they are being ignored and it's just a spacial viewpoint.

I'd be backing up since I like space.

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