12 Things We're Still Processing From the Outlander Season 3 Premiere

Goodbye, Droughtlander.

Jamie Fraser Outlander Sam Heughan

Goodbye Droughtlander (finally!), and hello Outlander! Our favorite era-crossing romance is back on TV, and I am PARCHED. Sam Heughan and Caitriona Balfe are back together on-screen (well, kind of...), as they should be. Here's everything we couldn't get over in the epic season three premiere, "The Battle Joined."

1. That first sighting of a fading Jamie at Culloden.

Oh my god, Jamie's so out of it that he is watching the Redcoats comb through the battlefield and kill every highlander left alive, but he still won't close his eyes and play dead. JAMIE! CLOSE YOUR EYES, GODDAMMIT. THEY'LL FIND YOU. He's breathing SO LOUDLY. Please be quiet!!!! I want you to be safe!!!!! (Although, he'll be okay, because...well, this is just the start of the third season and there is PLENTY of Jamie left for us to see. Eyebrow waggle.)

2. That moment when Jamie finally lays eyes on Black Jack Randall on the battlefield.

It's ballet, it's two leopards fighting in the air, it's vicious, it's been SO LONG coming, it's everything. Everything goes so, so still, and it's just Jamie and the asshole who branded and tortured him. They circle each other, and each manages to wound the other, but Jamie's dagger hits where it hurts. Finally, a very weakened Black Jack falls upon Jamie, almost in a grotesque parody of a lover's embrace. And then it's over. For good.



And good riddance.

4. The bunny on the battlefield.

What's with that bunny?????



Jamie never ever wants to wake up from this dream.

6. The way REAL BOSTON 1940s CLAIRE looks.

Hello, angel!!!!!! She and Frank are wandering through a big, beautiful house they're going to live in—along with Jamie's soon-to-come baby, he reminds her. Claire looks incredibly sad, but she's trying to put a brave face on. So is Frank; he even tries his hand at a silly American accent. Not Team Frank, but not NOT Team Frank, either. Poor Frank.


7. When Claire gets upset with the tricky stovetop and does what Claire does best.

Exasperatedly hiss, "Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ," and throw something. That's our girl! She's so, so pregnant.

8. Pompous American glasses professor can get lost.

"Professor Randall, you're going to pay closer attention to your wife's reading habits." OH IS HE NOW???????? Claire is livid when Mr. Glasses says that women should be popping out babies instead of trying to do things like, oh, I don't know, be doctors and lawyers. She did not travel back through the stones for this BS.

9. My God, Frank is trying so hard. He really is.

It's not his fault! His only problem is that he isn't James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser. But he's right when he says that Claire's been pushing him away. She can barely stand to look at him. "You asked me to leave behind everything that truly mattered to me," she weeps. It's a blow for ol' Frank. This is so sad. "Go or stay," he says. "But, please, do it because it's what you really want to do." He's really being a gentleman about it all, of course. But, I mean, who wouldn't cry literally every day if they'd had to leave Jamie behind? To probably DIE?


10. When Jamie's good deed comes back around to save his life.

How TF is Jamie supposed to escape the English firing squad that's eliminating the Jacobites one by one? But when a Redcoat hears his name, he reveals that his brother John Gray owes him a debt of honor—so despite the king's orders to kill all the traitors, our boy gets smuggled away in a cart.

11. Jenny and Ian are here!

Hooray! We loves them, preciousssss.

12. Brianna is born—and Claire doesn't even realize.

Because the gross sexist doctor put her under anaesthesia for the delivery, despite Claire having expressed her wishes to the contrary. This is not cool at all. When she wakes up, she's frantic that she can't find her baby. "Is it dead?" Claire demands. But then Frank comes in with little Brianna, who is perfect. "Maybe this really can be a new beginning," Claire whispers. Can it, though? "Where'd she get the red hair?" asks an unwitting nurse. Dun-dun-DUNNNNNNNNN.

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