Thursday, February 3, 2011

Open to Feedback? PROVE IT!

As leaders we often take pride in developing strong, open relationships with those that work directly for us.  We just "know" they would feel comfortable coming to us if they have an issue or concern.  Right?  In fact, we're so effective, that at anytime those employees can march right into our offices and let loose without fear of retaliation.  Right?


When was the last time you could honestly say you knew how your employees felt about you?  I don't mean when you received a card on Bosses Day or a nice birthday gift.  I mean, when did your employees really tell you, at length, about your performance as their leader?  It's been a long time for me too.  We spend so much time and energy focusing on giving them feedback, communicating regularly, and "engaging" them in order to get their "buy-in" that we often miss a terrific opportunity to build a deep, trusting relationship with our teams.


Many options are now available to help us collect data about our performance.  Ranging from one-on-one meetings to 360 degree survey tools  and external coaching sessions, we really have no excuse for avoiding feedback...unless we don't want it.  But that isn't you or I, right?


I would like you to consider a slightly different approach.  The process is straightforward, efficient, and based on trust.  First you'll need to identify a facilitator that both you and your team respects.  Bring that person with you, unannounced, to your next regularly scheduled meeting with the group.  Introduce your facilitator, explain you will be leaving the room, but that your guest will be asking three questions and documenting the responses.  

1.  What should your leader do more of?
2.  What should your leader do less of?
3.  What is your leader doing that should remain the same?

Clarify for the team that all comments are confidential and only you and the facilitator will review them.  You will then process through the feedback with your team at your next regularly scheduled meeting.


Have you built a foundation of trust with your direct reports?  Are you willing to take the next step and prove it?  Or, are you simply another Stuart Smalley?

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

pic courtesy of


  1. Wonderful suggestion. Takes a bit of trust for a leader to do it but the reward of knowing would be worth any risk. We used to use "Upward feedback" at PwC and it was anonymous. There were occasionally some partners who received cutting comments but for the most part, it was all constructive and really helped our leaders stay on track...myself included!

  2. Thanks Trish. I just had my management team go through this process today. The risks are real (for them and me), but if we don't take that risk, how do we ever build the culture we need to be the best? Your experience shows how powerful something like this can be. Thanks for the comment!

  3. Recently my boss said he wanted to talk about "expectations." I'd been through this before when a supervisor tells you what he/she wants and then the conversation is over. Not this time. He and I talked and he said, "Now remember, I want your expectations of me too !!" Floored to say the least. It's why he's in his role. He gives feedback and expects it back. I think that's key. It can't just be "let me tell you what I think about you." Great post Jay !!

  4. Thanks for the comment Steve. It's great to hear you're in a culture that supports this philosophy as well. Many thanks for the support!