100 Replies to “After Birth: Is It Selfish to Care About Your Body? | Op-Docs”

  1. I want to show this to everyone who assumes that having a baby is a simple thing that doesn’t affect the body permanently. I’ve heard that opinion from so many people – including doctors! – and the notion is just incredulous. Giving birth is a traumatic experience.

  2. World: pretty much the most important thing about you as a woman is what you look like
    Woman: cares what she looks like
    World: Wow, how self-absorbed. What's wrong with you?
    Different woman: doesn't care what she looks like
    World: Wow, how lazy. What's wrong with you?

    Cheesy way to put it, but I find it ridiculous with the pressure women get on their appearances to even pose the question of it being selfish or stupid that they care about what they look. What's actually stupid is how much the world focuses on how women look.

  3. Of course not! You’re still a human being…a happy mom is a better mom. 💕💕💕🙋🏻‍♀️👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

  4. You made a tiny human, now you need to take some time to take care of you 🙂 ..just as long as you know you're still beautiful !!

  5. Well, I wish there was a mom they could have included that had a POSITIVE birth experience. I had one so, I will share! I used hypnobirthing and purchased Chapter 4 Hypnobirthing podcast from a leading hypnobirthing expert. I was able to have a birth with very little pain! I "labored" at home for 6 hours or so and had my baby about 30 minutes after I arrived at my birthing place. I didn't birth in a hospital. I think women need to hear positive stories. I made it a point to not hear any negative birthing stories while I was pregnant. It's important to guard your mind from these experiences. If you visualize it enough, you can have a great birth! I didn't tear at all. I was up on my feet immediately after birth. My body was back to it's normal size at 7 months the first birth and is back now at 4 months. I haven't worked out more than three times. Eating a vegan diet is what I credit that to. No experience is wrong, but I wish the NYtimes could interview some women who have had POSITIVE experiences.

  6. After having my first child via emergency c-section, I felt much like how one of them described it—traumatized. So much so, that our timeline for a second child was pushed up. I knew the longer we waited, the more unwilling I would be toward pregnancy & delivery. As much as it sucked to literally deal with diapers continuously for 4 years, I don’t regret having them 17 mos apart. It totally changes your physiology and changes you psychologically

  7. Yes, we as women do go through a lot when we’re pregnant and once we deliver our bodies go through more changes. It’s like a dam roller coaster and I’m happy to see us finally opening up about what we go through. Everyone’s experience is different but it’s great to hear everyone’s journey.

    I’ve had two kids and my body never went back to what it used to look like☹️. But I’m blessed with two beautiful kids so I guess that’s my trade off.

  8. 🤔 I literally can’t understand why people have children. Kids are great but what a toll they take on your body and life…. But do you boo! Do what you gotta do to be happy and don’t apologize. I will stick with my pets lol

  9. Beauty is subjective, an illusion. It's sad that entire societies of people – men, women, transgender,… – have been propagandized into thinking "beauty looks like (fill in the blank)". Standardizing beauty sells products, but leaves a scar in the psyche of billions of people around the world who don't measure up to such a completely arbitrary defining of what "beautiful" is.
    For me, everyBODY (therefore, everyBELLY) is what it is, no judgement just an appreciation of their "being."

  10. I'm having a kid that will destroy the world we don't have because I would like. … like…. omg like… lol wtf

  11. Outside of having a physical &/or mental medical problem after having a baby (I had neither w/ my 2) there are more important things to focus on than what pregnancy did to my body imo. Having said that, I don't expect everyone that has a baby to be of the same opinion. This is a question that has to be answered individually, not collectively.

  12. So grateful for my childfree status. This life is not for me. This vid and these women solidify my choice. Bless them for their fortitude.

  13. Wow, I am so happy I got the notification for this video. I am 20 weeks pregnant with my 2nd child. I struggled immensely with how much "damage" my son did to my body. He was 9 lbs 15 oz, 22 1/2 inches. I'm grateful I was all belly, but it destroyed my belly along with 2 major surgeries. It was hard because I used to model and was so vain. But ultimately I realized he is absolutely worth it. I still struggle with the pressure society puts on you, but I just have to love and accept myself. Hopefully this pregnancy doesn't create irreparable damage or make it to much worse. But either way… It's definitely tough, but the kids are a blessing.

  14. I feel like the girl with the white hair and striped pants shouldn’t have chosen to be a mother. She’s only had negative things too say about motherhood and seems very unhappy. I know depression can be a thing mother’s experience after birth but the way she’s putting it all it just seems like she doesn’t like what she’s gotten herself into. Which makes me sad for her baby.

  15. I can only imagine how traumatizing pregnancy and birth must be. I feel like a lot of women are misled before having children into thinking it will be a purely beautiful experience. I also feel like it's kind of deliberate because society wants to keep women bound to motherhood and not be empowered.

  16. I think the concern is valid. I believe a person wants the best thing for herself is a good thing. It is beautiful to see the mothers have much love for their children.

  17. Her insides, like a digestive system was hanging out? That's a thing? Why would anyone let a woman go home?! Ladies, you arent selfish; you need TLC

  18. I don't think people are educated enough about how drastic pregnancy and birth are. We use words like "lifechanging" as if they're a positive step to the next stage in someone's life but we often don't take into account that not everyone wants their life changed or will be happy with how their life changes. I, personally, do not care for babies or children but I won't disrespect parents to say that it's easy or the boring default. But, it will not make you any less of a person, to choose not to have children. That doesn't make you callous or immature or denying your "role" as a woman or man.

    Not just allowance but acceptance of education and birth control and abortion allow people to make their own decisions and it's quite depressing that so many are so willing to push men and (especially) women into the roles of parents when they are unready or unwilling, just because they think it's "normal" and "moral".


  20. New born child…. we see perfection on earth… perfect innocence. So, some things are absolute. "Life is Most Important in Life" is another.
    We are all truthfully "Most Important", no matter how we look or what we do.
    Those that don't already understand this truth, should think, challenge, debate and possibly even accept it if they find it satisfying enough. It will be enough, but you have to choose welcome it in to your own thoughts and choices.

  21. The New York Times is staffed entirely by yellow journalists. They are a despicable collection of racists, pedophiles, drug addicts, perverts, and liars and every single one of them should be fired.

  22. So you choose your body over a baby????ANOTHER LIFE????? That's disgusting… beauty is not in appearance it's in mental strength, if you can fall and get back up THAT'S BEAUTIFUL!!! There is NO beauty in destroying life.

  23. Here is a noble idea. Keep your pants on and then you won't have to be so vane that you think the way you look is more important than the life of an innocent child.

  24. Why do we focus on controlling other people's lives? Seriously, it's high time we understood that it's no one's business whatever you look like, whatever you do, etc.

  25. This generation complains soooooo much about everything, if they work, if they have a child, if they are a
    house wives.. my gosh !!! Women around the globe and for generations been able to do what we want or we had to do,
    But this generation wants recognition for everything 🙄

  26. amazing documentary i love their honesty, personaly i am scared of having kids i think it takes so much energy and money and it has a big negative impact on the body, i am an antinatalist now it doesnt mean i dont love kids its just that when i have enough resources in the future i would prefer to adopt a baby rather than making one

  27. My cousin told me how, after giving birth, she started a daily exercise routine while the baby slept. The baby barely grew for a few weeks and was significantly smaller than she should have been, despite my cousin breastfeeding her.

    After speaking with her doctor, they discovered the lack of her child's development was due to the exercise regimen. So she made the painful decision to cut down on exercising until the breastfeeding is no longer required, and now the baby has recovered fully and is at a normal weight.

    It sounds like there is a balance to make, as is mentioned in the video, between keeping your dignity as a woman and as a human being, but also ensuring the baby is well taken care of and has everything it needs to thrive.

    Super video! Thank you for sharing these insights with the world.

  28. Want a nice life, look good and do what you want? Do NOT have children. It is good for the planet too, there are too much people.

  29. Why is this so negative? All Im hearing is the negative side of pregnancy. Why isnt there a neutral standpoint where there is the positive viewpoint and negative one as well. Extremely biased

  30. Im still struggling with depression after having my daughter. I barely leave home unless it's for work or grocery shopping :/ .

  31. To be a good parent, you have to be good mentally… You HAVE TO make you a priority too… It's not a trade off, nor should it ever be. If a manicure is going to make you feel more attractive…do it. Etc… (Apply common sense)

  32. Thank the Lord God my savior that i had a boy;son and i didn't get any stretch marks nor preeclampsia anything during birth came out healthy and with life too live with ♡

  33. Feeling good about my body is a part of my happiness. When I'm heading towards what I envision is my optimal self im happy. It's really interesting to hear that women feel selfish for compromising that segment of happiness.

  34. hey.. that is how you became woman.. if all of us became extremely narcissistic like these women.. there will be no next generation..it is shame to run this kind of program… Globalist agenda…

    No one really care about your body!!!

  35. One and DONE. I relate with this video so much. I waited to have my daughter until I was 28. I wanted that time to be selfish, do what I want when I want, and not be responsible for another human being yet. So glad I did. I’m now 3 years postpartum. She was a 9lb baby born at 42 weeks via emergency c-section after 12 hours of labor. I gained 70 pounds, suffered from PUPPP, extreme heartburn and worked 12-15 hour days 6-7 days a week before I had her. I went back to working out 2.5 weeks after giving birth (don’t do that) and tore a stitch in my scar. I had postpartum depression and struggled to bond with her because of how torn up my body was. Would I do it again for her? Yes. Will I have more children? No. Being a mother is hard and worth it, but it definitely changes things entirely.

  36. Simple answer : Yes. If you're focused on your body, it takes away from your children. Therefore it's selfish. If you're so concerned about how you're perceived by others more than focusing on your child then perhaps don't have a baby?

  37. The simple fact is that not every woman's body can handle pregnancy as well as others. Some women will be stuck with long-term damage to their everyday bodily functions for the rest of their life. On the other side of that coin there are women who's bodies will never allow them to conceive a pregnancy. I feel like artificial wombs will be the way of the future very soon. If humanity can find a way to remove the strain and complications that go with carrying a baby to term and giving birth, I'd be there for it. https://futurism.com/the-byte/grow-babies-artificial-wombs

  38. The simple fact is that not every woman's body can handle pregnancy as
    the future very soon. If scientist can find a way to remove the strain
    I'd be there for it. https://metro.co.uk/2019/05/14/human-babies-born-using-an-artificial-womb-possible-in-a-decade-8156458/

  39. Got Pregnant after loosing 140lbs 😩 definitely challenging to see your body completely change when you don’t have any control

  40. Thank you. I also had very mixed feelings after birth. I felt physically injured and not in control of my body’s functions. 21 years later and I am still annoyed by my c-section poof. It doesn’t preoccupy me but it is an issue in certain moments.

  41. How could it possibly be selfish to take care of yourself after you selflessly gave up your body to carry a child.

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