Skip to main content

What If Tuffy Narrated 'Hum Aapke Hain Koun' Like Pluto From 'Dil Dhadakne Do'?


25 years ago, history was made. It was 1994, and Hum Aapke Hain Koun, a movie about familial bonds, had the entire country obsessed with it. It was a major break from the action movies that ruled the box office back then, and the time was perhaps ripe for a new genre to break the monotony. Sooraj Barjatya of Rajshri Productions decided to remake one of their own movies Nadiya Ke Paar with a a few reworks and a leading pair—Salman Khan and Madhuri Dixit. And it was magic.

Rajshri Productions

The movie had every single thing that if worked into movies today, would make the audience cringe or take offense. There were major patriarchal tropes about women in play, there was blind love for family that trumped basic common sense, and there was a general lack of honest communication amongst the family members, which would've rendered the whole emotional climax of the movie unnecessary.

Not to mention, the sheer number of songs in the film! As if 13 tracks weren't enough, they went ahead and made two versions of the song 'Dhiktana', one before and one after the bhabhi's pregnancy!

Now see here, I was all of 3 years old when the movie released. And when I saw it, I LOVED it. Hum Aapke Hai Koun...! (yes, that extra punctuation is how it is) is a freaking gem, which no matter how many times it comes on television, you cannot not watch. In fact, for true believers like moi, it even takes precedence over the other two Rajshri gems about family values—the very meme-able Hum Saath Saath Hain and Vivaah.

And it got me thinking two things. Who was my most favourite character in the movie? It would have to be the dog Tuffy, who saved Nisha and Prem from referring to each other as Bhabhi-Devarji instead of Boo and BAE. And second, what if the movie could've been narrated by Tuffy just like Pluto narrated Dil Dhadakne Do?

At its heart, the Nath family from HAHK is as dysfunctional as the Mehra family in DDD. And only the dogs are the sane ones who get shit done. Besides, I totally think Aamir Khan, who'd go on to play Prem's (Salman Khan) BFF in Andaz Apna Apna later that year, would kill it as Tuffy's voice too, just like he did as Pluto!

The ridiculousness of that entire cricket game

Okay, first, is it really necessary to write 'Boy' and 'Girl' on hats of the male and female players? I mean, isn't it obvious? Even I, a dog, can tell them apart without the hats! And what's with bringing in a whole bunch of school kids to your home and force them to watch you play cricket? They aren't even getting a chance to bat, thanks to your nepotism.

But stupidest of them all, why would you go through all that and then make me, a dog, play umpire? You spend so much on the game and you couldn't care less?

How difficult is it to hide a pair of shoes, really?

Can I just say, Prem and Nisha and their family members are pretty much useless. Such a big house and they always found the most obvious place to hide the shoes. Had they not tried to do everything themselves, and let some less conspicuous person hide the shoes, things would've gone better.

The family turning enthu-cutlet upon the arrival of a daughter-in-law

I saw them, prancing around the house and celebrating the arrival of a new hooman. But from the looks of it, they were just glad to have a woman in the house who'd make sure everyone ate their food on time, gave them things right in their hands when they needed it, and finally produced an heir.

I was kinda happy about that new baby, until I realised it took away all the attention and love i was getting. And this tiny hooman would grow up to pull my tail and want to cuddle with me.

Doesn't Nisha have a job?

Dude! Who is this girl that my BFF Prem flirts with all the time? Doesn't she have a job? She's been here for days now.


Alright, how can hoomans be so naïve? These two have been flirting in like every song? And you're telling me that their own siblings, whom they are so close to, did not realise that they were in love? Even that vamp auntie who keeps complaining about everything (she even sat on me once!) could not smell this? Nisha pretty much got her ass-smacked with a flower that Prem threw at her!

Even amongst us doggos, that's a sign FFS!

Does no one in this family talk to each other?

I love these hoomans but they're hella dysfunctional when it comes to communication. Nobody talks about their feelings! They just sing and sing in metaphors, and hide their true feelings. So many of their troubles would've not existed in the first place, had they just talked. Prem wouldn't have had to take his bhabhi to her place to surprise her, she wouldn't have been so enthusiastic about the news, and would've kept calm on the stairs.


How can you be so daft as to not check your own wedding card until the wedding? OMG!​

Girl, how could you?

Wait, couldn't Nisha have been a mother to the baby while still being her aunt?

I heard the hoomans talking about that new baby needing a mother. I think my BFF Prem and Nisha would've made good parents to that little fella. She didn't have to marry Rajesh to be a mom to the baby! WTF, you guys?

Rajesh is a useless MOFO who was okay with ruining his sister-in-law's life by getting into a loveless marriage. But Prem was perhaps, a bigger one.

What would've happened had I not stepped in to help? Rajesh would've gone on to make his 'aadhi gharwali' his 'poori gharwali'! I thought he genuinely cared for her! But he would've been okay to enter into a loveless marriage with her?

But I ma more disappointed in my BFF Prem. See what I meant by not communicating with your family? See what happens?

Please, can some other family adopt me?

This family is pretty lame. Can't do a cricket match without me saving the day. Can't have their happy ending without me stepping in either. I'm so done, you guys!

Tuffy Out!

Cover Artwork: Dhawal Bhanushali / Mashable India