Thursday, April 25, 2019

Axis of Bot-Aspirancy

Your wish is granted. But the many deaths will be those of non-compliant miners. When wishing, always take care to be specific.

Our Agents arrived in Autaris and ganked an untanked miner. When a Code violator loses his ship, it's always a cause for celebration.

...But not everyone knows how to party.

Johny Karter protested the death of his alt's Covetor. Johny's bio, per Google Translate:

I am a blacksmith! I - forge on! I can not forging!

Johny insisted that he had been at his keyboard during the gank. Our Agents thought otherwise. The destruction of the miner's pod (which could have warped away instantly) suggests that the Agents were correct.

Johny would know a thing or two about being AFK. He once lost an Orca to NPCs in highsec.

The miner insisted that he couldn't imagine why anyone would buy a permit and still mine AFK. Johny was correct in saying that it would be nonsensical to do so. But the sad truth is that bot-aspirants engage in a lot of nonsense.

Johny was disgusted by the incident. He had been cheated once again by the children of perfidious Albion. Then he made a cryptic remark:

in short, I betrayed your bodies to your body, and the axis was my reproductive organ

After leaving the system, Johny switched to the alt who had been ganked and replied to the termination notice he'd received. He produced evidence meant to prove that he'd been at his keyboard during the gank.

I was NOT afk. Why:
I gave your body rotation, so that the axis in that think of the ring can

Even after reviewing all of the new evidence, our Agent determined that the miner had indeed been AFK.

The miner stuck to his story.

I repeat:
I betrayed your body to your rotation, so that the axis in that think of the ring can

I am not going to waste any more.
And not going to read English nonsense. you want to write something - write in Russian

With the revocation of his mining permit, the miner was forced to remove the permit from his bio. He replaced it with a chilling warning:

Do not believe the codes - still deceived.

The miner truly had been deceived--by himself. He thought he could do the impossible: He thought he could outsmart the Code!


  1. That Xan guy is such a handsome agent.

  2. It's so funny CCP added NPCs who also gank miners. Even funnier considering how successfull they are. Praise Guristas Production! Praise James!

  3. 'Your friend in James' is a terminology beautiful beyond what my mundane words can express, and it's now my favorite synonym for an Agent.

    By the way, is there a Russian friend in James around who could tell us what the miner kept saying? We all appreciate the poetry google translate does, but now too much of the meaning got lost in the process. Provided the miner had any in the first place.

  4. this miner lost an orca to npc's, pff.

