Phoenix. {poetry}


Do you remember the first time you walked in nature all alone and felt this wild place in you where solitude and communion meet? Where you slip out of your skin and become something greater? A magical creature who is luminous and tender and deeply alive? Who trusts her instincts, tracks the wind, follows her inner compass, knows what she wants, is true to herself, and howls with joy?

Have you ever fallen lower than you thought you could bear, until you finally surrender to accept what is and find yourself rising from your own ashes to sing your song out loud? To hear the Universe singing with you? To love again, even though you’ve been hurt again, because love is the great fire that burns in you and makes you sing?


The story I heard
was that she was young
12, maybe 13
and she used to like to walk alone
in the woods
and lose herself
in the rhythm
of her bones and her blood.

Her heartbeat was her best friend
it tapped its song
from inside her chest.

And one day she took a trail
she’d never seen before
and it wound up and it wound down
and it wound and it wound all around.

Until it finally opened on a clearing,
and in that clearing
was an ancient pool
made of stone
and covered with vines
spring-fed with crystal waters
pulsing, pulsing with life.

And you know what she did?
Yeah, you know what she did!
She ripped off all her clothes
and she dove
under the water.
Yes, she dove
under the water.

It was cold as lightning
and sharp as a knife
it took her breath
and it took her voice
and when she came back up
the birds were singing her song.

They sang: La-e-aaah-ay-ay-ay-i-yi-yi-hey-ya-ya

She floated on her back
gazing up at the sky
the forest laughed
and the forest cried
and right then the clouds parted
and the sun pierced her eye.

Something changed in her brain
signals crossed
new connections made
and suddenly all that had been dark
blossomed open
into the light of day.

Her heart grew hot
and it burst into flames
her body shifted
and her body changed
her tail unfurled
and her feathers grew
her fur and her talons
they grew too.

She let out a sound
like a holy cry
from every pore
of every one of her eyes.


She rose straight up
in a flurry of wings
leaving flames on the water
leaving flames on the wind.

She flew and she sang
she sang and she flew.

She didn’t come back down
until she remembered
exactly what she’d come here to do.

Then a voice like a whisper,
a voice made of feather, said:

Yes, love, yes
breath by breath
yes, love, yes
from birth to death.

Yes, love, yes
breath by breath
yes, love, yes
from birth to death.


Meredith Heller is an ageless elfin-child with a Celtic heart. A gypsy-poet philosopher with a penchant for humor and a pocketful of wisdom. A melodic priestess who weaves easily between light and dark, major and minor. A woman who thrives in nature, runs with the wolves, and delights in the wild beauty of life. A poet and singer/songwriter who is on the trails every day, teaches poetry writing to teen girls, and is mused by nature, synchronicity, and kindred souls. You could contact Meredith via her blog.


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