To: The Republican Party

From: Me

CC: Sean Hannity, Fox News shills, D.J. Trumphole, V. Putin

Re: coup d’etat

It has come to my attention that you have been openly disagreeing with the Special Counsel investigation, as well as the other investigations it has spawned. While I understand that you are unabashed capitalists, but when you put money before human life… Welp, tough shit. Suck it up, Buttercup.

Remember how you were screaming about being a country of laws when the last guy was in office? That still applies, he hasn’t been able to get rid of them yet.

You see, this, what’s going on right now with the warrants, and the investigations, and the indictments… This is exactly the kind of thing that still draws people here. The knowledge that even when a bunch of fascists use loopholes, conspiracies, and voter suppression tactics, to try to steal control of the government, the very same culprits will get investigated.

That is the American dream: To no longer let some rich asshole with delusions of grandeur and a daddy complex, try to take over the country as “ruler for life”, with a lineage of blood relatives as successors. And to do it without huge social upheaval, and massive loss of life.

In most other places in the world the same acts would have ended in a bloody coup d’etat. Families would have been displaced. People would be living in refugee camps. And someone would end up on war crimes in the end.

So, anyway… if you guys really want to shut down investigations and do away with our current legal system, go for it. Just keep that picture in your head. The one with Trump trying to run… limping down some podunk airfield in the Appalachian Mountains, trying to hop on his last supporter’s private jet before it leaves the country. The plane takes off. Trump falls face first in the dirt while chasing the plane. And then you see a couple of shiny blacks shoes crunch on the gravel besides his body. Just then a firm, calm voice says, “Mr. Trump, please keep your hands where I can see them. You’re under arrest.”