Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Mom's here for her yearly Thanksgiving visit.

And that's quite a good thing considering that lately, life's been throwing herculean challenges in this character's path.

Listing them out, while tempting, is too much like wallowing in a story, a Me-ing. Yes the events exist as story, but seeing through the mind's attempts to claim these things as "mine" is both amusing and irritating, simultaneously.  Because mom's here, there are also old patterns of Me-ing  resurfacing, especially those which would turn to a mom for comfort or consolation.

Obviously, there's still some post-no self transitioning going on here.

But watching mom's thought patterns from the other side of the threshold is interesting.  It's easy now to see where those in this personality have come from.  Sometimes it's endearing to watch her familiar gestures just to see how they match up to this body and brain's thoughts and movements.  And observing as she processes events as either an insult to the self, or a compliment to the self, is an exercise in waking up all over again.

Then there's just listening to her dole out advice on handling life's changes.  Some of them come from a place so deep in wisdom that I'm in awe.  I hear the words, but the message just doesn't apply the same way it used to.  Instead, the advice is appreciated for the moment spent in her presence, knowing that the mom I always assumed was there is instead an amazing expression of life itself.

There's no point to this entry, actually.  It just wanted to be written.

Photo credit:  LakeRoad