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Married To Medicine Recap: Who Do They Think They Are?

Married to Medicine Ancestry DNA Dday recap

Married to Medicine Ancestry DNA Dday recap

Here’s the thing about Married to MedicineQuad is exhausting! Seriously, this entire season was all about her. And that’s nothing new, of course.  It’s just tired.

Dr. Jackie was the one with the big, life changing event this season. She separated from her husband, Curtis after finding out about his affair, but it was still just Quad, Quad, Quad.

And on last night’s episode,  Dr. Jackie had the big, life changing event: Curtis was moving back in! But it was still just more Quad. But first, a little on Jackie and Curtis. He moved back into their home, but NOT the master suite. Dr. Jackie said he needed to sleep in the basement. Like a dog. It was perfect!

Curtis wasn’t happy about it, of course, but Jackie told him that the  new arrangements would stand for the time being because it was “going to take more than words for him to get back in the bed”. Yassss, Jackie!

Ok…so back to Quad. She and Dr. Greg have been at odds all season. However, the source of  their troubles isn’t completely clear, least of all to Greg.  Quad throws around a lot of vague platitudes about “not being fed emotionally”, but is never specific about what exactly she wants Greg to do, which leaves him frustrated.

Now don’t get me wrong, Greg is equally exhausting, and his constant need to berate Quad about all that he “provides” for her can border on cruelty at times. But they’re trying to make it work, and that’s probably for the best, because I can’t imagine there’s anyone else on earth,  who could put up with either of them for more than five minutes.

To that end, they’ve been working with a “marital focus group”. What even is that, you ask? I have no idea, but it appears to pretty much be 3, or so, couples sitting around talking about their relationships. Well, actually it’s 3, or so, couples sitting around talking  about Quad and Greg’s relationship.

The other couples just sit, staring with their mouths agape, as Quad and Greg gripe about each other, sometimes addressing the group, sometimes just each other, as though the others aren’t even in the room. The other couples in the focus group rarely get a word in edgewise, and I’m not sure why they continue to come over. These gatherings don’t appear to have any therapeutic benefits, other than the other couples walking away feeling relieved that, at least, they’re not married to Quad or Greg.

When the focus group gathered in last night’s episode, Quad began by telling everyone was that everything between she and Greg was “absolutely, positively the same”, even after the couples trip to Barbados.

Greg said that Quad had been “withdrawn” since they’d returned to Atlanta, and that they didn’t know how  “selfish, nasty, and immature” Quad could be. Jeez…how do you really feel, Greg?!

Quad asked Greg if he honestly felt he was any better, to which he responded, yes! In an effort to disprove him, Quad launched into a story about Greg calling her while she was getting her nails done, and insisting on arguing even though he knew other people were nearby. So…arguing in front of other people in the nail salon is bad, but arguing in front of other people in your living room is perfectly cool? Interesting.

This prompted Greg to sarcastically apologize for expecting her to take a break from her “cuticle conditioning” to speak to her husband, who was “sacrificing and providing”, so that she can sit around getting groomed. When he then reached toward Quad, she pulled away, and told him to keep his hands off of her.

At this point Greg dramatically rolled off the couch they were sitting on, and sprawled onto floor, moaning in frustration. Umm…isn’t this guy a PSYCHIATRIST?! Do his patients watch this show? Does the AMA watch this show?

One brave member of the focus group tried to cut in with his own anecdote about how he’d had similar feelings when his own wife had stopped working to stay home, and raise their children.

Uh oh! This is ANOTHER sore spot between Quad and Greg. He would like for them to start a family, but she won’t even think about having children as long as their marriage is in “strife”.  Seems like a sound and unselfish choice.

As Greg explained that Quad “didn’t have no kids” to take care of, she cut him off, and suggested that he get a “new wife”, who could give him a “new life” that included children. At this, Greg stormed out of the room, and a door could be heard slamming in the distance. Quad was unphased by this and simply looked at the others as if to say, “see”.  A psychiatrist, people!

But Greg certainly isn’t Quad’s only victim. No one is immune to her tantrums and “over sensitivity”. The other ladies deal with it constantly, but when they broached the subject with her in Barbados, it had only lead to a big screaming match.

Last night Simone and Quad went to lunch, and Simone tried to bring it up again, but Quad wouldn’t hear it. She tried to blame it on Simone’s “delivery” but as Simone said, she could have “sung it to her in a lullaby”, and it wouldn’t have mattered…Quad just can’t take criticism.  But there was plenty more to come.

In an effort to make up to the group for some of her more heavy handed tactics on the couples trip, Heavenly arranged for everyone to have their ancestries traced through DNA testing, and  planned a big party to reveal their results.

It was a nice idea.. a group of  strong, prominent African American friends finding unity, and celebrating the rich culture they shared. What could possibly go wrong? Well, a lot, actually.

Once the ancestries of the women were revealed, and we found out that Mariah’s real name is Lakeisha (what?!), Toya decided to get some things off her chest.

They were all sitting together at one table, but for some reason Toya picked up the microphone they’d all used when reading from their ancestry charts, and used it to address the group. She began with Heavenly, saying that while she was leaving what happened in Barbados in Barbados, she wanted Heavenly  know that she had been offended by her intrusive questions and holier than thou attitude during the “Circle of Truth” exercise.

While bringing it up a week later over a microphone is technically the exact OPPOSITE of “leaving it in Barbados”, Toya’s complaint was valid and Heavenly accepted it, and apologized. Whew…crisis averted, right?

Hahaha…no! Because then Toya turned her attention to Quad. The two ladies had met for lunch, during which  Quad had been discussing her work as a “brand contributor” (let’s not even ask) with BCBG. Toya asked about the company’s financial stability because she’d read about the possibility of a bankruptcy.

Seems like  a pretty innocuous  question, right? But, for some reason, Quad took Toya’s questions VERY personally, and so, of course, went into attack mode, and called out Toya about the $170k she and Eugene owe to the IRS. Toya felt that this had been unnecessarily rude, and was shocked because, after all, Quad had been really supportive throughout the whole ordeal. Had all of that support been “fake”,Toya wanted to know?

Throughout this entire exchange, Quad had been arguing back with Toya, and trying to justify her rudeness. But she became absolutely furious at the mere utterance of the word “fake” (I guess the 5 different wigs she wore throughout the episode were real), and said that if that’s how Toya felt, maybe they should “never speak to each other again”! Good grief!

When the other ladies tried to interject in an effort to calm things down, Quad shut them down immediately, pointing at each one, and saying, “you, you, and you, stay out of it!”

By this point everyone had had enough, especially the men, and just before Quad could start in on Toya again, Eugene jumped up, and said that when the women were all together, they acted like a bunch of “C***S” or was it the n-word he said?! Oh, hell no! Wrong room, wrong women, wrong choice of words!

The women were speechless (for once) and the other husbands wisely took the opportunity to usher poor, stupid, misguided Eugene safely out of the room.

With the men gone, the women began to speak a little more calmly, and before long, Toya and Quad had smoothed things over, although everyone secretly agreed that Quad had, once again, behaved childishly.

After speaking with the men, Eugene apologized, saying he “shouldn’t have lumped all the women together”. OK…so only SOME of them are ‘fill in the blank’?! I’m confused. But the ladies seemed to take it in stride—except Heavenly, who stormed out of the restaurant.

Something tells me that this isn’t over…not by a long shot! Be sure to tune in next week for the season finale!

Photo Credit: Steve Dietl/Bravo