


This blog is about getting the right perspective so that thoughts do not control your emotional state. And to let go of your fear and anxiety.

1. Get specific.  

Fears are often general stories. And stories are bigger than the actual thing. What is it exactly what you fear?  The more specific you get, the more you realize that nothing is ever as bad as the story you made up.

For example, one of my biggest fears was that everyone would judge me for not being fulfilled in academic life anymore, after my wake-up call last year. But breaking up the story made me realize that only very few people might actually turn their heads away and that the majority would want me to be happy in what I was doing for a living.  

So break up the story, as it never happens like that.

2. Approach the problem with the right perspective.

Think about what you want to achieve. And question yourself whether it would truly matter in the long run, if it happened. Which it likely never does, and IF it did, you will figure out a solution, because there are always options.

Getting back to my example, would in 5 years from now it matter that few people would not understand or disapprove of my decisions? No, as there is only one person responsible for taking care of my happiness and that is me. The opinion of others would in the long run not matter for that.

So it is all about how committed are you to create that future version of you or reach that particular goal. If bad things happen, you will figure a way out.

3. Embrace the worst-case scenario.

Embrace the worst that can happen. Have the belief and faith in yourself that you will be ok if that happens. As you have been always ok, surrender and accept it.

A guarantee for anxiety to thrive is to feel into that worst-case scenario. We cannot control the future, trying to control causes distress, so embrace uncertainty and let go.

My worst-case scenario is that no one would understand my choices. But I already know this is not true. I have many friends to whom I told my life story and their responses are different, though all supportive, as they want the best for me. And sure, there will be others that disapprove, but he, do I really want those close to me? I let go of that fear of possible judgment.

4. Get in the present moment.

Fear and anxiety do not exist in the present moment (unless you are in mortal danger). A great way to get back in the present moment is to close your eyes, your senses, notice your breath. Smelling, hearing, watching, this you can only do in the now.

And there is nothing to fear in the present moment. Fear is for future things to happen, that will not occur, and if they do happen, there are ways out. Accept the unknown.

5. Increase heart-body connections.

Break the pattern of your mind going wild by focusing on your body during performing physical exercise, or doing something that you love with your hands. Whether it is art, something creative, gardening or baking bread, do it mindfully. Really focus on what you are doing. Combine it with using your senses, or get into nature for a connection with all there is.

gratitude journal
gratitude journal

6. Gratitude.

Think about what you are grateful for. Having a roof above your head, food to eat, friends or family that care about you. The money you earn in a job, even if you do not particularly like your job. A beautiful sunrise in the morning, a fresh cup of coffee. You cannot be in a negative state of energy (fear, worry, anger, jealousy) when you are grateful. As a good habit, list what you are grateful for every day; this will bring you in a positive state of energy.

So, believe that you can achieve what you desire. Stop fear and anxiety, stop overthinking, get back in the present moment, and be grateful. You cannot change the future, you can only change the present moment!  
