In Bed With Your Enemies


Rachel has a secret. Too bad Coach Sue Sylvester knows all about it.

Romance / Drama
Age Rating:

A First for Everything

It was a Friday afternoon and classes had most definitely ended for the day. Furthermore, with no Glee Club meeting scheduled, Rachel normally would have been quick to return home; keeping herself two weeks prepared beforehand always kept her days nice and neat, not to mention ensured that she'd be primed for the hectic schedule from her, no doubt, successful Broadway career. However, instead of metaphorically penciling in her future schedule plans, Rachel stiffly sat inside the office of the one person she'd rather just avoid all together. Unfortunately, fervidly praying to all the higher authorities one could think of doesn't always bring about the desired outcome. And so, at that very moment in time, Rachel was left staring at the back of a rather luxurious looking chair.

The room's occupants both continued with the unnerving silence, neither uttering a single word. Rachel briefly looks down at her hands and resisted the urge to start wringing them – a nervous habit Rachel almost got rid of but still shows up from time-to-time. The sound of shuffled papers brings her attention back to the situation at hand; just in time to see a chair swivel, placing her face-to-face with one Sue Sylvester.

Rachel momentarily wondered whether this horrid dream – it couldn't possibly be anything else – would soon approach an end. She eagerly awaited for the familiar surroundings of her room to reappear and the unperturbed visage of Miss Sylvester to dissipate. Stilling her hands, Rachel resisted the urge to pinch herself awake on the off chance that this event was an actual moment in her life.

All the while, Sue simply sat with papers in hand as she settled comfortably in the present atmosphere; the woman loved a good scare. Once satisfied, the track-suited woman began.

"First things first, you're on the Cheerios."

"I don't–" Rachel starts only for Sue to continue on without regards for whatever added commentaries from the girl involved. "And you're off Glee," the Cheerios coach states simply.


Rachel's answer was immediate and said with such finality and vehement that Sue actually paused in her actions of signing the papers she had. Placing the pen down on her desk, Sue straightened in her seat as she stared at Rachel square in the eyes. She wanted to see if she could make the hobbit quiver.

After a moment's pause, to ensure she had Sue's full attention, Rachel began with her side of the conversation.

"I'll join the Cheerios but I will not quit Glee Club. Not even if you tell everyone what you know about me," Rachel staunchly proposed as she crossed her arms defiantly for emphasis.

Throughout the entire proposition, Rachel never once failed to maintain full eye contact with the Cheerios coach. Not a single flinch during the encounter spoke volumes of the seriousness Rachel was conveying to the other occupant of the room.

Sue's eyes narrowed momentarily before she leaned back on her imported leather chair, a customary gift from Principal Figgins for leading the Cheerios on a six consecutive National Championships winning streak.

"Fine," Sue compromised before folding her hands, "But I expect the same level of dedication, if not more, as your unfounded love for your pathetic Glee Club."

"Fine," Rachel reiterates with Sue's previous use of the word before promptly standing up from her seat and beginning her much wanted exit.

"Welcome to what will be the most important aspect of your life," Sue calls out as Rachel passed the doorway.

Disregarding the unanswered reply, Sue only resumed with pouring herself a cup of her fantastically-made protein shake.

Nothing like a good (albeit short) verbal spat to end the day.

Monday morning could not come any sooner and everyone was feeling the effects of an unsatisfied weekend. But none of that compared to the feelings evoked from a sight the Cheerios would inevitably encounter.

"What the F," Santana states plainly to what must have been a mistake thrown in front of her.

The idea that this was some sick, twisted joke fell flat, however, at approximately 1.5 seconds after the Cheerios coach appeared nonchalantly by the vertically challenged, fashion reject.

It made for a very disturbing image. And most of the Cheerios were ready to believe in the possibility of a shared hallucination bought on from living a diet of only the coach's homemade protein shakes.

"Look alive people! I won't hesitate to slaughter each and every one of you for having an off day."

The shout jolts everyone into attention and resulted with a blur of red and white suited cheerleaders moving towards their designated spots.

As Sue moved to inspect the dismal group, the image of the close by abomination continued to remain. Eyes didn't cease to waver between the imposing figure of Sue Sylvester and the not-so-far-away monstrosity that refused to dissipate.

It wasn't long before Quinn couldn't ignore the big (pint-sized) pink (red) elephant (yeti) that has yet to excuse itself. There must have been some rational explanation for this delusion. Stepping forward, Quinn approached the issue.

"Coach, why is that… thing wearing," Quinn began only to end with a waving of her right hand over the definitely unwanted mass nearby.

"I would think it's obvious," Sue simply states before sidestepping Quinn and moving to address the rest of the squad. "Girls, welcome our new flyer."

Everyone couldn't help but gawk at the news; some of the girls even became slack jawed.

Rachel Berry, a Cheerio?


Sheer pandemonium.

"We don't need a new flyer. We already have all the flyers we need," one of the Cheerios spat out almost heatedly. But the moment she did, the girl wished she could backtrack from that verbal mistake.

Sue had calmly walked up to the insubordinate and swiftly bought up her bullhorn. With the simple press of her right index finger, the tall woman spoke just one word.

"Wrong!" came the boom as the sound continued to echo throughout the field. The once outspoken cheerleader only shrinks back in response as Sue sneers at the girl's previous audacity. Letting out a small snort of disgust, the woman turned to the rest of her cheerleaders.

"You only have four flyers, whereas I clearly remember ordering five!" Without pause, Sue continued blasting away through the bullhorn; she wanted her point to come across loud and clear. "Don't forget that Stacy here sprained her ankle last Friday," Sue carried on in her authoritative state.

The aforementioned Stacy quickly perks up in attention at the mention of her name and raises a hand for notice. "The doctor said it should heal by –" the injured Cheerio pipes up only to be stopped.

"Don't bother. You're no longer a part of the squad," Sue pauses momentarily to signal towards the new addition to the team. "And Berry's here to replace your spot. I expect the uniform you're undeservingly wearing dry cleaned and back on my desk before the end of the day."

"I-I-I," Stacy stammers out as Sue shakes her head at the idiocies that seem to surround her on a daily basis.

"Did I stutter?" was the rhetorical quip.

A shake of a head was the girl's answer before Sue pointed out some ways by the bleachers, bluntly telling the bumbling girl in front of her to depart from her sight.

Stacy could only solemnly nod, mainly to herself, before limping off pathetically. It was obvious to everyone that the girl was trying to hold back her tears. Sue could only sneer at the weak display of emotions.


The girls finally returned to the locker room and, simply put, practice was hell. Not that it always wasn't, but with the new addition and subsequent expulsion of Stacy from the squad….

Everyone was off their rockers.

And being off meant not double but triple the amount of workout as determined by one Sue Sylvester. It was amazing that anyone survived, much less having the new 'Cheerio' keep up with everyone.

Spying the cause of everyone's troubles first out the lockers, Santana quickly swerved in her actions and bought her attention towards the other two parts of the Unholy Trinity.

"What the hell are we gonna do? That," Santana had to pause momentarily, "Thing is a part of the Cheerios now."

The Latina clearly remembered how Coach ordered the rest of the squad to treat Berry accordingly since she's 'one of the girls', effective immediately.

Santana almost shuddered at that definitely unnatural phenomenon.

"Rachel needs to wear Cheerio skirts more often," Brittany proclaims proudly.

Scratch that. Santana did shudder. Having the Gleek Queen paraded around as a Cheerio was just so wrong. Massively wrong.

Quinn arched an eyebrow at Brittany's (definitely odd) thoughts before addressing her answer to the problem.

"We'll see how long she'll last as one of us. I'm still cheer captain so it's only my duty that I ensure she's got the right stuff for being a true Cheerio."

"Man stuff maybe," Santana scoffs before throwing the last of her belongings into her locker.

The other two followed suit and soon all three were roaming the halls of McKinley High.

There was no way in hell that Quinn or Santana was going to let Rachel Berry remain a bona fide Cheerio.

And Brittany? Well, Brittany was happy as long Rachel kept wearing them short skirts.

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