Monday, October 26, 2020

CT scan from hell.

I don't know how to even sum up what my journey through gastroenterology has been, but you can see some of it on my Instagram where I have a few videos.  To say it has been a nightmare is an understatement. 

The last failure was pain management, and they sent me back to gastroenterology because my immense pain after injections that should eliminate pain was a signal that hey- something else is wrong with me. Thankfully, my gastroenterologist was a little more fired up at trying to figure this out and was actually kind of angry this wasn't cut and dry, which I'm 100% OK with because I am also angry and I am hoping two angry people can come up with a solution. 

We went over everything again. He decides we are going to do an unbelievable amount of lab work to rule out IBS and Crohn's for good. He's positive it isn't either of those but he definitively wants them ruled out. He said I was going to get an abdominal CT done, easy peasy. It's the nausea though that is a hang up for him because nausea doesn't mean a stomach issue. Nausea is a weird thing that is a symptom of everything. Just because you're feeling like you're going to barf in the middle of Target doesn't mean something is up with your digestive system. A lot of the time it can be a neurological thing, so if my labs are alright and my CT scan is alright, HE is going to order an MRI of my brain and we are going to hope that we see something different in it from my MRI from 2018. 

That's where I'm at: I am actively hoping for something glaringly obvious to be glowing on a screen saying I'M THE PROBLEM because at this point I really just need to know what the hell is going on. I mean, am I dying? Do I have cancer? Is it something I can fight/fix? Is it something I take medication for? Special diet? Am I going to do die in six months, because if so I'd like to know so I can plan it out. I mean, these are all the things going through my head as I wait for my labs. 

Spoiler: my labs were mostly fine. Just a couple of things were slightly low but nothing that signals something really going wrong. So my next hope was the CT scan. 


I did that on Friday and everyone told me it is like a 5 minute thing, which.... technically, the scan itself WAS a 5 minute thing. The scheduler said I had to be there 90 minutes before to "get set up" which, alright. I figured I would bring a book or something. 

Imagine my shock when the lady comes out with this beverage and a straw and says she'll be back in 20 minutes. Alright, weird but I can do this. The drink itself isn't the worst. It really was like flat Sprite that never had fizz and not sugary at all but more... salty? It really reminded me of the glucose drink when you're pregnant. Here I thought I was done with that horror but nope. 

I got it done in 20 minutes and thought THANK GOD I'M DONE just as the lady is coming out with another one. 
Then she informs me I actually have to drink three of them and I get 20 minutes per bottle. 

You guys. I am not someone who can eat or drink things I don't like, I really struggle. I actually managed to get all three down and the others in the waiting room were whispering "chug it" as motivation but I barely got it down. That last sip I thought for sure was going to be thrown up. 

A more pressing issue was my bowels. They said I could pee (which thank god) and I ran for my life and I had never peed that much in my life. Never. Not only did I pee but I realized that, oh yay, I now am going to have a bout of uncontrollable diarrhea. Isn't this grand? This is exactly why I don't eat/drink much at all outside of my house. Or if I know I won't be going home right after, my intestines cannot be trusted. 

Once I feel like I'll be good for a little while, I go back in just as they are calling me. I go in for my scan, they run an IV so they can do contrast which, alright. I don't know what it is about the techs that do scans but they cannot do IV's on me and this guy tried hard but my arm looks like I'm an intravenous drug user right now. Also, some kind of liquid got sprayed all over my sweatshirt and it's in the wash and I hope it came out otherwise I'm going to be angry, it's new and my new favorite. Anyways. We do the scan and I can feel my bowels waging war and I'm getting legitimately nervous. He tells me the contrast will make me feel like I've peed my pants but nobody ever has and in my head I'm wondering how many people have crapped their pants in here because I really don't want to be the first. 

By the time the scan is done (I did not crap my pants), I literally RAN for the bathroom and spent the next 45 MINUTES typing a strongly worded email over the patient portal to my gastroenterologist that he needs to freaking warn someone that these drinks are basically giant laxatives and MAYBE you should have told me to buy an adult diaper or bring a towel, or SOMETHING. 

After I felt somewhat alright, I go out to my car where again, I wonder if I should go back into the bathroom or try driving and I just want to go home so I decided I would speed home. 

That turns out to be a terrible plan because guess what? Construction. There is a construction project beginning and four lanes of traffic merging into one at the end of the work day on the freeway. 

I actually thought about what my plan would be if I really couldn't hold it, do I get out and just... hope I don't end up on the news? I mean, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? 

After almost 30 minutes barely moving, I get to the Wisconsin exit and literally haul ass. I think I blew a stop sign, for sure a red light, I drove like I stole the car. I got home and I barely made it to the bathroom. And I really mean BARELY. Fast forward twenty minutes of losing my bowels and I go down to get into my pajamas, throw clothes into the wash, and again.... diarrhea. This continues for hours. Oh, but then about two hours into being home I start (wait for it) vomiting! 

Take a guess how great vomiting up flat Sprite is- I'll wait. 

Spoiler: it is awful. It is as awful as you can imagine anything but combine it with diarrhea at the same time

This is when I write my second strongly worded email over patient portal because by this point I am angry. I can't remember being this angry in awhile. 

I give up around 8 p.m. and decide the diarrhea is down to like once an hour so I'm going to try to go to bed because now I'm just exhausted. Also, keep in mind that I have Sheehan's Syndrome and secondary adrenal insufficiency so if I start throwing up or have diarrhea I need to take more of my medication because I could easily go into an adrenal crisis and that's bad. So I take more meds and go to bed, hoping I don't crap in the bed. 

I made it through the night but all day Saturday I felt absolutely awful. I was nauseous and I hadn't had stomach pain that bad since the day I had my gall bladder removed. The best part is I got the best call from my doctor's assistant who kind of chuckled at my emails (she is familiar with me, we can laugh together) but then tells me it is usually the IV or the drink, and if it is the drink you only need one. 

ONE, you guys. 


I had three. 


On the bright side, all of my insides were really expanded or whatever so there is no reason they can't see stuff, right? 

As of right now I have no other information from the scan, but cross your fingers something glaring is on there, OK? I know that sounds odd, but I really need to know what it is because living with pain and nausea all day every day is a bit much at this point. 

1 comment:

Why Girls Are Weird said...

All that drinking sounds UCKY. Kind of makes me think of when I chug Emergen-C, except I purposely put that in a 6 oz. glass so that I can just get it down. ICK.