• scott sitner

Next to normal

Updated: Oct 16, 2020

End of August 2020

This used to be one of my youngest daughter's favorite plays. Thankfully I am just using the title and not the drugged out suburban housewife set of facts. I am not actually sure if it really is a return to normal which is why I am using the phrase next to normal. Things are sorta kinda better, in a truly sorta kinda way.

My kids left, that is the biggest thing. The eldest came in for six days, drove in, I think partially out of desire to be home for a bit, to again, feel a little normal, part out of obligation as the other child and cat needed to be driven back to Boston, and partially I hope to see his parents, and more importantly me. I will never really know which of these are true or not. I will say it was nice to have everyone home even if only for five days. We did stupid things like just sit at home, I tried to leave and make sure they had some space in the house. We finally were able to celebrate Alex's birthday with a very expensive (thanks Junction Clinic) dinner at Eddie V's steakhouse(eddiev.com)

I am not really sure why I find my kids' drinking habits amusing but I do. To see them appreciate good wine, fancy drinks and cocktails is just well, amusing. I guess I like it more that the appreciate good food and are well behaved and even like to dress up a little even more. And on that note, I never understood why some people feel ok wearing shorts to t- shirts to nice restaurants. What are they trying to prove? That they are better than we are because they don't care how they look? Or that they are just rude and obnoxious and live to ruin other people's experiences. Oh well.

It was nice to sit outside, with other people, and feel good about it. I also cannot believe they are 24 and 21, but what parent does not feel that way? The rest of the weekend was a bit of a blur of laundry, vet appointments, a broken car AC that was just too expensive to fix and of course the cat who almost died on the trip back to Boston because the car AC was broken(my bad), but thanks to one Hilton Hotel in Cleveland and a few doses of kitty Xanax, all managed to make it there safely if not happily.

The world seems to be getting a little better, we can safely share golf carts now, eating outside and even on rare occasions inside is ok, although the inside thing is a bit off putting at times. There are still no social activities, life seems to still revolve around where will we eat, what will we cook and when is bed time. The presidential election is going in force and becomes more abhorrent with each passing day, but that's for another blog. I am still fascinated by it but also horrified, it's an odd combination of feelings. But as for the world, summer helps, the weather has been great, I dread what will happen in two months if things are not better and I can't get outside. Travel is a still a great unknown, the Las Vegas trip was officially cancelled, no one had any interest in going, it just sounded like a bad idea. I did get up north one more time which was fine, my parents even ate outside but I am not sure if my mother enjoyed or tolerated it "(those people aren't wearing masks!"). Anxiety is so hard to deal with and when everyone has a "story" about the next or last horror, there is simply never a break or a time to wind down even a little. My yearly golf tournament was canceled, that really sucked.

Mentally I think we are all just worn out. You want to talk about other things, but there are not a lot of other things to talk about. It pervades the news, work, social life. It is all just a giant waiting game to get better when I think we all instinctively know it is not getting better. Well, except for those who know this is a hoax and the end is "just around the corner" Newsflash, it isn't. So we just keep I guess going forward

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