March 3rd, 2004


It's one of those damn days, isn't it?

There's sand in my shoe. Not just a few grains, but enough to make me slightly uncomfortable.

You know, I haven't been to a beach in at least three years, and I'm pretty sure I didn't wear these shoes there. So why now? Ugh.

I'll be spending my aniversary with Tina (6 years tomorrow) without Tina, it seems. Maybe I should buy a bottle of Yukon Jack and spend it with that, instead? Nah, the plan is to put in Raiders of the Lost Ark and fall asleep on the couch.

I'm dreading Friday. Tina wants to go to Outlands, and I really, really don't. But I'll do it anyway because it's her birthday, and she asked.

What the hell does one wear to that club? aside from "black", which is, I think, requisite. *rolls eyes* Not only is it dancing to generally garbage music that I don't know, but it's goth, bondage, S&M, cross-dressing, and a bunch of other subcultures that I'm decidedly apathetic toward at best.

And the weddings coming up are *all* depriving me of things that I *want* to do. One is keeping me from going to an academic conference that I *really* want to attend, and the other is placing me in the middle of nowhere during a Buffett Concert *on campus*!

This weekend Tina's going up to Cleveland for her birthday. I'm staying here and entertaining guests for the weekend. And I have a business meeting for the Grove on Sunday. Speaking of, we need to rent the place we used last time for this next ritual, huh? I suppose we ought to get on that, seeing as we haven't but two weeks until we do said ritual.

On the bright side, today my car *finally* gets picked up by the Kidney Foundation. This rocks, because I no longer have to worry about my neighbors thinking about lynching me for having an (effectively) abandoned car on the street.

Still trying to finalize plans to get to Kansas City. We'll see how that goes soon.

I have to go pick up special food for the girl cat, who probably has a UTI, during lunch. This thrills me to no end. After work, it's off to Target and the mall to pick up aniversary gifts and birthday gifts for Tina.

*rolls eyes*

Woo-frickin'-Hoo, baby. Woo-frickin'-Hoo.

Down the road to the city where the Dudes and the Dykes all look the same. . .

Things always look up when you have a full stomach. I think it's some secret evolutionary trick to lull us into a sense of security as we wait for the next explosion.

But I'm not complaining.

I'm actually pretty happy right now. Infinity's special food *and* urinalisis cost $30 all told. Compared to the $60 I was expecting, this is quite the treat. I think I got a secret discount, but I'm not sure.

On my way to the clinic, I drove past a house that I've been inside once, but I remember the girl who lived there, and I missed her. That was a good feeling.

I spent $8 at Dairy Queen, fulfilling a craving I've been having for about two weeks, but that came to a head last night. One Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Blizard, please. Make it a large.

(**Note: I was torn between the Blizard and my favourite item there, the Butterscotch Dip Cone. I wasn't in the mood for sex, though, and so chose the Blizard.)

I also have bubble-wrap here, and that's keeping me very cool. It's amazing how thereputic it is.

I was thinking about the weird mood-swings I get. They're an almost daily occurance, really. It's kind of amusing when you look at them, from an outside point of view.

The trick is to remember that really, there's nothing in life that's important, except the things *you* love, the things that go *right*.

"I got a roof over my head,
Someone to love me in a four poster bed,
And I can play this here guitar. . .
I thank my lucky stars."

Focus on what works, and don't dwell on the sludge at the bottom. Too many people worry about the scum in the mountain stream and don't pay attention to how sweet the water tastes.

But most importantly, see the cosmic joke in all of it. I know from experience that there's a jester who watches us all, and moves us when we're just getting used to life. The Cosmic Clown sees all, knows all, and dares all. Can you hear the laughter?

I can, and it's a beautiful thing.