Always Have a Safety Word

Story Submitted by Marcus:

I was out with a group, and one of my female friends brought her own friend, Mallory, along.

Mallory was very easily the center of attention. She had a comeback for everything, had some great stories, and, in short, was a cool girl — the type you want to be around.

For any other guy, she might have come across as intimidating, but I had an unhealthy mix of courage and foolhardiness (and a bit of alcohol) that night, and so I made it my goal to get her number.

We talked for a bit at the bar, but when I asked her for her number, she refused to give it to me.

"I can't date anyone right now," she said, "I may not date anyone, ever again."

Disappointed, but truthful, I said, "That's fine. We can be friends."

She said, "I don't think I even want that. I'm having a hard time trusting guys right now."

She spanked me, which was an awfully flirtatious thing for a woman not looking for any male companionship to do.

I offered to let her be for the rest of the night, and for the next couple of hours, I didn't interact with her and did my best to ignore her.

Towards the end of the evening, she and I ended up sitting next to each other in a booth and she started kissing my neck. I turned to her and went to kiss her.

She turned away and yelled, "No!" and slapped my thigh.

"Don't tease me," I told her.

She asked if we could go outside. When we did, she confessed to me that her last boyfriend had tried to kill her. When I asked her how, she wouldn't tell me, but she said it was during sex.

She became weepy and I said, "I'm sorry," and went to embrace her. Not to kiss her or take advantage of her, just to hold her.

She moved into my arms, then yelled, "No!" and jerked away and slapped at me. Everyone around us took notice, and I stepped away from her as she continued to slap at the air, as if waving away a cloud of attacking bats.

I went inside to get her friend, but when we came back out, she was gone.

I didn't hear from Mallory directly again, but her friend did relay me the message, weeks later, that Mallory would "accept my apology." I have no idea what I had to be sorry about.


  1. How about being sorry you ever met her..

  2. I can sort of understand if she was raped and she just wanted to feel like she was in control, but leading a guy on and then refusing to follow through is a pretty uncool way to do it. I'd even go so far as to say that that could get her raped again =/

    Either that, or she was lying for attention.

  3. Um can we say psycho??? Count your loss as a gain, OP!!

  4. Lei is correct, view the events in your life from the Net Gain Perspective. What's the worst and best things that could happen? Chances are, the best thing that could have happened is that this girl walked away from you.


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