Tired...nervous...in pain...

First off, I tried gently rubbing my hip when it hurt early this morning from sleeping on it, and the pain got worse when I was rubbing it. Not good. 

I am a mess. I am exhausted. I haven't slept soundly in weeks. It's either tossing and turning because my hips hurt, or getting up to pee, or not being able to breathe. I believe this is the most tired I have been my whole pregnancy. I am even having trouble just walking slowly. Sitting at my desk, my mid section is tired. I don't have the energy for anything.

And this is just from regular daily life. Where I sit my ass at a desk all day and do a few things at night (like having yummy dinner with Lindsay, and a trip to Joann's).

I am truly dreading next week. I'm not even excited about the trip anymore. I shouldn't complain, because it's Disney during the holidays and I should be happy, but I'm not. I'm scared out of my mind that I am going to be miserable. Because I KNOW I'm going to be miserable. I know how miserable I am around here on a daily basis. Imagine 6 straight days of getting up early, traveling to the parks, walking around said parks, waiting in line for the few rides I could maybe go on, waiting around for Brad & Summer to go on all the stuff I can't, and not being able to crash again until late, late, late at night.

The worst day will be Magic Kingdom on the 31st, because the park gets so crowded that you have to get there very early and you can't leave because you can't get back into the park. They close it down when it reaches capacity. And that's New Year's Eve so we really can't leave until after the midnight fireworks and stuff. I am going to DIE.

I looked into renting a scooter - it's $50/day to rent at the park. I COULD get it from an outside vendor cheaper, however, that would mean I would have to bring it on the buses and I so don't want to be one of those people that you have to wait for to load onto the bus when all you want to do is get to the park/your hotel.

And wheelchairs, though $12/day, would mean Brad would have to push me all day. And people would stare at me. And imagine maneuvering a wheelchair through those crowds! I can't even walk through them half the time, especially at parade or fireworks time.

Brad doesn't really seem to get it. He says he does, and he keeps saying "we'll take it slow," but I take it slow every day. I sit at a desk all day long. I come home, and usually sit down and wrap gifts or even just crash on my bed and watch TV. And I'm still tired. He is overestimating my ability for handling next week. I'm not afraid unnecessarily, I truly know that next week is going to KILL me.

:( Woe is me. Ha. :(


  1. Just remember that this is a vacation, not an obligation. You don't have to do anything at all. Yes, I know it would be a shame to travel all the way there to not partake in all the normal things you would. But the sole point of this trip (as with most vacations) is to have a good time.
    If a good time for you is staying in the hotel and taking a nap or watching a movie, so be it.
    The best thing you can do is try to chill out, rest when you need to rest and don't be upset about missing out. You can (and will!) always go back again, with a little son of your own :-)

  2. Also, I forgot to include the part that I seem to say in every comment to you :-) ...

    I am sorry you aren't feeling good now. I can't even imagine how hard this pregnancy had been/is being on your body. And I hope you don't ever feel guilty for "whining" so much, because I, for one, really do care. And secondly, I think some other poor woman out there is gonna find this blog and completely relate to you like you did with that book!
    Pregnancy isn't all smiles and boobs and glowing!

  3. You're right. I just feel that I need to be at the parks because we have dining reservations set up (we already paid for the dining plan, so me not going actually costs us money) and the park tickets (again, would cost us money), and with regard to Universal, I really want to see Harry Potter and turns out that's the day we check out of Universal and into Disney so there's no hotel for me to go back to :( Also, going back to the hotel mid day by myself means taking the bus by myself and everything. Nothing I CAN'T do...just not something I look forward to doing....

    :( It's a no-win for me. But I do appreciate your comment.

  4. I agree with everything Shannon said. It's not going to be good for you and baby if you do more than your body wants you to. How many days are you there Are you able to alternate your days - park day, rest day, park day, etc.? I know you'd be losing out on the food but at least it wouldn't be everyday. You'll figure out when you get there what's best for you. But I agree, it's a vacation - don't exhaust yourself....trust me you'll be wanting to get rest while you can now before Austin comes.

    On a different note - it was great to see you last night.

    Thank you so much for your thoughtful gifts. As predicted Cameron called the irish ornament "santa" and he loves the polar bear!!!
    Thank you.

  5. Aw you're welcome! :)

    I really can't totally skip days. The schedule is Universal the first day, Islands of Adventure the second day, and then the four disney parks over the next four days. There are no rest days, or duplicate parks. And meals we have reservations for every meal - breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and already paid for. It just really isn't practical for me to just hang out at the hotel, unfortunately.

    I don't really know what to do.