Right after I got my abortion my mom forced me to get onto a stronger birth control…ever since then its been working, unfortunately. Everyday i keep praying that it will fail and I will get pregnant again. My boyfriend keeps saying he's not ready, but I can't help it, I want to have a child so bad. I want a baby girl of my own. I still am having dreams about her sleeping next to me in my bed, or of me rocking her to sleep. I know that having a child isn't just about those moments, but I've watched my friend raise her baby, and I've watched him on many occasions, and I know I could do it and be a great mother….is it so terrible to want a baby when my boyfriend doesn't?