Friday, February 20, 2015

7 Quick Takes about Fancy Pizzas, the Wrong Way to Wear Underwear, and a Preschooler Having a Midlife Crisis

It's 7 Quick Takes Friday!

(If you're new here, you might want to follow Unremarkable Files on Bloglovin so you don't miss any of the random hilarity.)


In our house, I cook on the weeknights but Phillip is our special occasion cook (in other words, he's Emeril Lagasse and I'm the haggard junior high cafeteria lady). So our Valentine's Day dinner was all about his pizzas.


True to food snob form, Phillip couldn't just throw some cheese and pepperoni on a crust. One pizza was brussels sprouts and smoked pancetta; the other was mushrooms, sausage, and kale.

It was tasty enough that the kids didn't complain about the lack of pepperoni, and that's saying something.


Unfortunately I don't keep kale in the fridge at all times (I'm still trying to get over the kale phobia I developed when we got a CSA last summer and received about 10,000 bunches of it in 3 months,) so I had to make a run to the grocery store just before dinner to make said pizzas.

The benefit of going grocery shopping on Valentine's Day in the late afternoon is that an employee will come over and give your kids some of the slightly deflated "Happy Valentine's Day" mylar balloons just to be nice. And your kids will react like she just gave each one their own unicorn and their weight in candy.


We also celebrated Valentine's Day by going to a friend's wedding. As we were waiting for the ceremony to start Phillip was a little quiet, so I asked why.

"Just thinking about what it would be like to have your anniversary on Valentine's Day," he said.

"Too much pressure?" I asked.

"No!" He said, "I think it's efficient. The only thing that would be better is if your wife also had her birthday on Valentine's Day."

Now that's thinking like an engineer for you.


This weekend we got another foot of snow, but what else is new? 

By now, we have something like 3 feet of snow on the ground, and it's all this soft, fluffy stuff. So to my kids, the yard is basically a bounce house where you wear snowpants: do whatever you want, slide around like a penguin, jump off the deck railing, you won't get hurt.



Phillip also built this ker-azy sledding track for them over the deck. You climb a stepladder to get to the top, and then rocket down into the backyard. It's insane.


I don't know who told her about layering, but my 3-year-old's fashion sense has gotten a lot more interesting since the discovery. My personal favorite outfit this week was black tights underneath plaid shorts, a flower T-shirt, and a neon yellow-and-gray fleece pullover. 

It wasn't until she was putting on her leopard-print hat to leave that I noticed a pair of balled-up Elmo underwear inexplicably caught in the hood.

Yes, she went out in public like this (minus the underwear in the hoodie.)
No word yet on whether the undies were dirty or clean.


This week is February vacation week from school (which I don't ever remember having growing up in the Midwest, but hey, it's New England rules here,) and I think I made it about 4 hours in before freaking out over the pigsty that the house had become.


Having all the older kids home from school 24/7 has taken the level of messy in this house to a new height.


In keeping with our general lack of structure during this break from school, we've skipped a few naps and gone to bed late a few nights watching movies. The kids are doing reasonably well, with maybe the exception of my 3-year-old. 

Getting ready for bed last night, she had a full-blown crisis that resembled a middle-aged woman having a nervous breakdown. 

When I suggested that she brush her teeth, she draped herself dramatically across the bathroom counter wailing, "I don't want to spend my time doing that!" Then when I deferred her request for a second bedtime story, telling her we could read it tomorrow, she moaned, "But that's wasting my time!" and collapsed in a puddle of tears on her bed.

Apparently I don't understand how demanding and rigorous a preschooler's schedule can be. I'll try to be more sensitive from now on.

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April Lou said...

What is it with three year olds? They are so moody. I have a perfectly lovely child one day and a three headed monster another! :(.

Alexa~FurnishMyWay said...

Wow! The mind of an engineer-- just thinking about how to make things more efficient. So funny! Great post. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it!

Peggy said...

For real efficiency, just skip Philips birthday:). And don't worry about the messy house, just have fun -I guarantee the mess will be there and you can clean it next week.

Jenny Evans said...

Hmm... I wonder if he's thought of that before.

Jenny Evans said...

Personally, I'd be thrilled if she just chose one personality and stuck to it for a whole day. :)

Anonymous said...

Three year olds are warming you up for the 5 year old phase. Come to think of it, when is there NOT a phase? My dad used to say all children should be 10. He said that was the most delightful year ever. Hmmmm.... I can't remember that far back hahahhaah

Jenny Evans said...

Maybe when they're 40 - no wait, I think that's a phase, too.

I have a 10-year-old, and I really do think it's a sweet age. Although I don't know that most birthing mothers would agree with your dad about all kids being born 10!

Samantha P said...

Hilarious as always Jenny! That snow!!! You pretty much live in a ski resort now don't you?! Brussels sprouts on a pizza? Very, very wrong :-) I bet there are loads of men out there suggesting Valentine's as a good day to get married under the guise of being romantic - sneaky people! X