




After Game Freak decided to cut every corner.

What do you call the Hulk when he picks up Captain America's shield?

The Star Spangled Banner

You know I gotta say, I’m a big fan of shields.

They’re really something I can get behind.

Captain America's shield was made of Adamantium. What was Hawkeye's shield made of?


[Marvel Avengers Age of Ultron Spoilers] If Captain Americas shield is made of Vibranium what is Hawkeye's shield made of?


How much does a Human shield cost?

One life

The Avengers and Deadpool....

For once, the Avengers and the Deadpool decide to team up and destroy a H.Y.D.R.A. base.

While trying to infiltrate the base they encounter a room, which leads them to a vault containing some files. Deadpool says he is the strongest, so he shall break all walls. Thor days his lightning can de...

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An Arab boy is speaking with his father.

“Father, why do we wear these shawls on our head?”

“To keep the harsh sun off our scalp” He answers.

“What about these long robes father?”

“To protect us from the blistering wind that carries stinging sand.” Father says patiently.

“And our sandals?”

“To shield our ...

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There was a king ready to abdicate.





A woman walks onto a bus

A woman walks onto a bus holding her baby. As she scans her card, the bus driver looks up to her and says, "Have a sea... Whoa, that is an ugly baby!!".
The lady is shocked and shields the baby with her hand and takes a seat. She just sits there getting more and more angry. The man sitting n...

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Two knights are riding through the forest

and they come across a peasant. One knight lifts his visor and says, "Pray thee, have you seen a black knight with a red lion rampant on a white shield?"

"I'm afraid not sir knight."

"Very well, then. Go about God's business."

They go another mile down the road, and they come ac...

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Grandmas Tattoo

I was waiting on a table of a big family. 7 of them, three kids, mom and dad, and grandma and grandpa. Grandma was your typical OLD OLD OLD grandma. In a wheelchair with a blanket over her legs, looked like one of those apple dolls, spoke in a whisper.

She sees my tattoos, grabs me with her b...

A posh New Yorker...

A posh New Yorker decides to take her two young children on a European vacation. Upon landing in Berlin the trio check into the Ritz Carlton. Even though the Ritz has a fabulous, five star restaurant, the mother thinks they should indulge in the local gastronomy, and they lace their shoes back on an...

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Retirees Having Fun

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their

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A white, black, and Mexican are in hell...

A black man, a white man, and a Mexican die and are sent to Hell. The Devil looks at them and says "You can choose any shield of your choice, and if you survive 3 lashes from my whip you can go to Heaven."

The Mexican says "I want a shield of diamond." It breaks on the first lash and he doesn...


NASA engineers build a cannon that launches dead chickens at the windshields of airplanes, military jets and such to test the strength of the windshields against collisions with airborne fowl.

British engineers are eager to test it on the windshields of their new high-speed trains. Arrangemen...

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A man saw an unusual funeral procession

At the head of the procession was a man leading a labrador on a leash, following 2 slowly moving hearses. He cannot contain his curiosity and walks alongside the man at the head of the procession to offer his condolences.

"Sorry for your loss, who's in the hearse in front?"

"My wife"...

Did you hear about the hostage situation at the spice factory?

They used a cumin shield.

Chaos Theory

Two friends are chatting in a pub.

- Have you heard that Mike died yesterday?

-- Oh no! What happened to him?

- He was about to pass our house driving his car when he crashed into a parking car on the side of the road, broke through the wind shield, flown through straight in our...

A man is walking down the street in Dublin when he hears a woman screaming and detects a faint smell of burning in the air.

The man steps forward and calls up ...

The King and the Thrones


"Do you know what the hardest part of the night is?" asked the taxi driver.

"Is it his shield?" I asked.

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No mention of this p...

the fowled experiment

