let there be peace

dapat sa FB ako magrarant pero dito na lang..hahaha

nakakastress sa newsfeed ung mga FB friends kong citizen na ng ibang bansa pero makareact na bobo sa mga chosen candidates ng iba akala mo andami pa nilang alam sa Pinas. Diba itinatwa nyo na pagiging Filipino nyo?anyare? Saka ung mga friends kong sobrang analytical at argumentative kala mo grumaduate ng PolSci at Statistics pero hindi marunong magcalculate ng majority versus minority. Dahil wala pa sa top12 ung OtsoDiretso ninyo, INC agad may kasalanan? Iunfriend niyo na ko please. hahaha. tapos na eleksyon. Resulta na lang inaantay. Manahimik na kayo.😂

#walangpakialaman #botonilapakemo #hindiakoregisteredvoterperonakakastresskayo


death penalty for rape

I was browsing my FB newsfeed when a post caught my eye. Streaks of blood in a hospital floor. I got curious and I read through the article then I got furious. A 5 year old female kid was raped. Yes. Raped. Her lower part was bleeding so much the nurse and bystanders thought she got caught up in an accident. No info was given regarding who did that unimaginable thing to an innocent kid. I hope they rot in hell real bad. I hope someone will make them pay. I actually wish them dead so they’ll do no further harm.

I wish for death penalty as a punishment to those fucking rapist. Sa mga pabibo na magsasabing hindi kamatayan ang sagot, tangina sabihin niyo yan sa limang taong gulang na binaboy ng mga rapist na yun. At sa mga iba pang pabibo na magsasabing buti nga hindi pinatay, sabihin nyo yan sa batang yun at sa lahat ng biktima ng rape na kahit matanda na sila ramdam at tanda nila ung kababuyang ginawa sa kanila. I should know. Someone close to me was almost raped and she still has nightmares until now. How much more to those rape victims? Pano nila haharapin ung kinabukasan?It would take a lifetime perhaps more to move on sa ganyang pangyayari sa buhay.

Pamura na din sa mga victim blamers na nagsasabing walang mararape kung maayos manamit. Punyeta sabihin nyo sakin kung kamaniac maniac ba ung 5 years old na batang babae na nakapantulog.

Gigil na gigil ako sa nangyari sa batang yun at ipinapanalangin kong makayanan nya yung dagok na un sa buhay niya. I wish no other kids, women or man shall suffer the way she did. Fuck rapists. Fuck drugs. Fuck evil.

Sorry naman sa puro murang post. Gigil much talaga ko. May anak akong babae. I couldn’t imagine what is going on inside that kid’s mom and dad’s mind. Just imagining something horrible like that might happen to my kids makes me want to go on a rampage. Ay talaga naman. maghahalo ang balat sa tinalupan.

don’t count the eggs before they are hatched…

as of now, may 2 akong work online. ung isa full time tapos isang part-time.

supposedly may isa pa kong part-time as CS sa isang website na may adult content. kahapon ung start ko pero unfortunately kahapon din ako tinanggal hahaha ang sakit besh. nageexpect na ko ng dagdag income. ung kahit hindi ako familiar sa mga products nila na mala-50 Shades of Grey gora lang ako kasi 2 hrs per day lang tapos ayun ambilis lang. Wala pa kong nakakaisang araw na natapos tanggal agad. Ganito kasi un, ang sabi sakin log in time ko is 1PM till 2 PM PST so nung sumapit ung time na un inopen ko si Hubstaff at nagclick ng start time. From time to time, chinecheck ko ung mailbox for any customers email at pati website at mga email drafts para mafamiliarize sa work-around process. Isang oras at kalahati ung lumipas, nakadalawang emails lang ako so sabi ko petiks sabay nagemail ung bossing sabi “very low productivity” tapos biglang nawalan na ko ng access sa CS mailbox pati sa mga dropbox folders and email drafts. Nagreply ako na ano gagawin ko, wala namang email na dumating maliban sa 2 customer emails. Hindi na nila ko nireplayan gang kanina lang sabi nung Pinay na senior CS, dapat daw icclick ko lng ung start sa Hubstaff pag may ginagawa akong email inshort ndi xa continuous unless madami tlagang gawa. So aun, masama ng konti ung loob ko kasi last week pa lng nagtanong na ko sa kanya kung paano ung proseso sa company, pano ung ganito ganyan tapos nakadalawang email pa ko pero nganga. walang reply. Tapos isang email lng ni bossing reply siya agad tapos kineclaim nya pa na dalawang beses siyang nagpadala ng email sakin regarding those info. duh. shunga ba ko. if may malinaw na instructions at orientation silang binigay edi sana ndi ko irrun ung Hubstaff ng tuloy tuloy kahit walang gawa. Saka nakakainis lang kasi oras mo ung binabayaran supposedly tapos ang gusto per email eh wala naman sa job post nila un. ah basta unfair.

anyhow, magmomove on na ako, nagtanong ako if part pa ba ko ng team or terminated na ko eh kaso wala na namang reply so inalis ko na sila sa OLJ profile ko as part-time employer. gusto nila ganyanan eh.

so far, pangalawa na sila sa ungas na employer na naencounter ko from OLJ. ung isa sa sobrang pagkaungas, pinagwork kami (anim kami puro Pinay freelancers) one week un (ako 4hours for 3 days lang trinabaho kasi late hired) tapos biglang the next week wala na kami lahat access sa folders and everything tapos siya super reklamo na incapable kami kaya pinalitan nya kami at hindi din binayaran. Oo ikaw un CEO ng Gold Virtual Assistant, Ms. Arriana Cromartie. buti na lang natanggal na siya sa OLJ at ung mga kasamahan ko nagfile na ng report sa kung saan sang site na pwede siya ireport.

may karma din kayo. hmpp.

heart & hate relationship

Dear Lazada,

I hate you…

I hate you because you make me feel poor (I couldn’t afford all the good stuff in your platform)

I hate you because every time I open your app, I keep on adding stuff in my cart that will just sit there for decades but will never be bought (exaggerated much?may dekada na ba ung lazada?hahaha)

I hate you because you keep on emptying my wallet (feeling ko monthly may inoorder ako sayo hahaha)

On the other hand..

I heart you because you make shopping convenient (lalo sa taong bahay na katulad ko na once a week minsan twice a week pa nakakalabas ng lungga)

I heart you because you show me incredible stuff that I like (like the Kiiplix and Paperang na sayo ko lang nadiscover pati ung mga multivitamins na gummies para sa mga junakis ko tapos ung mga bags na magaganda pero ang mamahal para sa ordinaryong taong kagaya ko,hahaha)

I already tried uninstalling you because I keep on checking you everyday looking for good stuff to buy but still I installed you back because my phone feels empty without the your icon (hahaha adik na)

I hope I’ll get over you soon.

Otherwise, just give more discount vouchers especially for expensive but really good stuff. It would be much appreciated.

one of your loyal shoppers,


nabasa ko lang

nakita ko to sa FB story ng dati kong katrabaho, ang tanda ko wala na sila nung isa ko pang dating katrabaho pero may anak sila. at base sa update nya sa newsfeed ko may bago na siyang jowabelles. (ang tsismosa ko, right?hahaha) oh well bihira naman ako magpost sa FB at ang ginagawa ko lang ay maglike at magheart ng post ng friends ko. She just happen to caught my attention because she keeps on posting about being overly depressed and suicide is so damn rampant that I just couldn’t shake her off my thoughts because as far as I can remember, she’s one of the jolliest person I know.

anyhow, whoever made her feel that way deserves the middle finger.

I did the middle finger to Hitler a million times in my mind but he’s still together with mamadear. I wonder, iniisip din kaya ni mama nun na may kulang sa kanya kaya naghahanap si Papa ng iba?

I also wonder though I have yet to experience but I’m already trying to prepare myself for it. (pero hindi ako sure if I’ll ever be ready) Would I be forgiving as my mother? at mag-iisip din ba ako ng mga thoughts na “kapalit-palit ba ko?” gaya nung lines ni Liza Soberano dun sa movie nila ni Enrique Gil na My Ex and Why’s.

oh well papel, wag pangunahan. baka magkatotoo, hahaha buset na FB story…kung saan saan na nakarating ung utak ko…

so I am reviewing for an upcoming English exam and I was getting my confidence slowly until my boss called me via skype

boss: hey Aubu, how are you?

me: I’m good, how are you?

boss: so I’d like you to meet Erika, she’s the new chief operating officer of the Billing Dept.

me: nice to meet you

boss: so we called to ask you how confident you are if you are to go back to posting payments and codes

me: I’m quite confident. I just think I need some refreshments (instead of refresher course, the hell, gutom siguro ko)

boss: okay, we just need your opinion about this coz we’ll be doing some minor changes with the job descriptions and duties and all.

me: okay (ung gusto kong magfacepalm dahil sa refreshments)

boss: okay bye we’ll get in touch with you soon.

ung totoo.. ung confidence level ko back to zero hahaha so wish me luck talaga😂


so a student from my alma mater sent me a pm via fb asking me to answer a survey regarding tracing alumni whereabouts

I’ve actually done this before but for a different batch and after answering their survey, I feel overly underachieved. If only being successful could be done by just reviewing for a certain exam or quiz and voila! You got a perfect score! but no, it’s like a maze cave that will keep your heads turn and make your stomach churn. I should know, I’m still on the journey and I have yet to see the light at the end of the tunnel. You know that feeling when you should be doing something more than what you’ve always been doing. something big. no erase that. something that you do that makes you feel worthy of yourself.

I’ve always felt I’m a mediocre student (you strive hard but still you’re always halfway to the top) and now I still feel the same, graduated decade ago but still the same mediocre person that I am. I don’t know. maybe it’s the lack of sleep that’s making me feel this way, it sucks.

anyhow, remember the part-time job I told you about? I think I’ll just let it go, I’m having second thoughts of continuing on it. First, the trainer/VA of the company owner doesn’t respect anyone’s time. There was this time that I was told that training starts at 7am only to be told later that it was moved to 9am. There was another time where I was made to wait 5 hours for training evaluation only to be told that she can’t make it because she has lots of tasks to finished. I mean, the world has invented many different ways of communication and they didn’t bother to tell us trainees earlier?I didn’t receive any apology for my time wasted and was told nothing will be paid for the time I waited because nothing was done. With just one week of being with them makes me pity myself, I mean, yes I approached them for a part-time job but it’s like I’m begging them for work. Is it my ego or pride? Or they’re just clueless or shameless. I’m still thinking. I had our laptop repaired and it cost me some money and if I have a part time perhaps I’d be able to earn the money I spent back. But still, I’m having bad vibes on this. I’m applying still but no luck.

Maybe I should have tried lottery again. Maybe I’ll get lucky. Gosh. Where have all the years gone by. A decade more and I’m on 40’s I’m still nowhere near a successful career or financial state where I could safely say my kids will go by swiftly, grow and graduate without financial strains. What the hell did I do during the past years….

shhhh mind. stop thinking…tomorrow is another day..

dernier cri

since I already promoted my newest site, allow me to promote my new online shop as well in IG, hahaha,

I introduce you all to Dernier Cri, just search for it’s IG username which is “dernier.cri.ph” and you’ll find preloved/unused/brand new clothes and other stuffs that I’m selling😊

I was hesitant at first to open an online shop because I wasn’t really the business woman type but I decided to still go for it just for the sake of trying. hahaha Dernier Cri is a French word for “the newest fashion”. It’s a little ironic because it says newest when in fact most of the items that I’m selling are preloved but I went for it because I wanted something catchy and unique (only to find out that there are 5-10 more online IG shops with the same name) hahaha so much for uniqueness. Anyway, I launched it a few days ago and I still have a small number of followers the reason I am promoting it here hahaha, my objective so far is to get rid of the items I’ve posted and if everything went well, I might continue selling other pre-order stuffs there. I have a friend from a previous company offering to be my supplier for korean/japanese/chinese stuffs like dresses, beauty products etcetera. Oh well, que sera sera, wish me luck😊

the struggle is real

hindi ako palaaway na tao at ang pinakagrabeng nagawa ko sa buhay ko ay hilahin ang buhok ng isa kong pinsan sa sobrang bwisit ko sa kanya, (p.s. hindi sabunot kundi hila kasi ang haba ng hair niya, tumakbo siya nun tapos hinabol ko tapos hinila ko ung dulong buhok niya, at talagang nagpaliwanag ako hahaha)

feeling ko mahirap talaga makipag-away at makipagbasag-ulo pero pakiramdam ko ngayon mas mahirap yung makipagbuno ka sa walong buwang baby para lang mabihisan siya at malagyan ng diaper nang hindi siya masasaktan.

hahaha >:)