JJ was about to go to the town square when Jennifer called him. He talked to her and told her goodbye. Doug and Julie went to the hospital to invite Abe to their Christmas dinner. Abe wanted to be by Theo's side. Gabi went to see JJ. She wanted to go to his mother's house with him, but he said he wasn't going. She noticed that he was wearing his uniform and wanted to know what happened. She saw the notes and read the one addressed to her. She was upset that he was about to commit suicide. Doug and Julie remembered Abe that they were friends and going through that together. Abe told them that Jennifer's son shot his son. They understood and let him be with Theo. Gabi tried to talk to JJ about when she wanted to end her life. She begged him not to take his life. Rafe asked Ciara what she wanted to talk to Hope about. Rafe wanted to know what Ciara was going to say when Shawn, Belle, and Claire showed up at Jennifer's place. Gabi tried to use Arianna to keep JJ from committing suicide. When that didn't work, she told him that he would break Jennifer's heart. The Hortons gathered for their annual tree trimming party. Ciara and Claire started to argue. Everyone put their ornaments on the tree. Abe cried at Theo's bedside. JJ told Gabi that he had to go to the town square. Jennifer decided that she was going to leave. JJ wanted Gabi to go out of his way. She refused to move out of the way. She read his letters to him. She showed him the picture of Arianna. He broke down and she hugged him. Jennifer went to the hospital and ran into Abe. She wanted to talk to him. Gabi wanted to stay with JJ. She believed things would be different in the morning. They got into the bed and hugged each other. Lani walked in and saw them in bed together.
[Low, dramatic music] Jj: "I've come to see that I can only pay for taking your life by taking my own. So I'm going out to the square, to the same place where I shot you, with the same gun. And maybe, in some small way, it will help balance out the universe, make up for what I took from you." Abigail: So do you have any guesses as to what santa's going to bring you for christmas this year? Chad: Ah, well, I'm not sure much can compete with the christmas miracle I got last year. Abigail: Hmm. Chad: You came back to me. [Soft music] Maggie: Any christmas memories coming back? Will: Um... [Laughs] You know, I thought moving in here might trigger something, but I--I don't remember this house or this room at all. Maggie: Well, I'm just grateful that you're back where you belong. Sonny: Just in time for christmas. Maggie: Exactly. Christmas is all about being with the people that you love. Gabi: Yes, well, I'll meet you over at jennifer'S. Eli: Yeah, I'll see you there. But, gabi, do I need to bring anything? Hey, you there? Gabi: Sorry. Yeah, I'm here. I'll--I'll be right there. I just have to make one quick stop. ["Greensleeves"] Eli: Hey. Lani: Hey. What are you doing here? Eli: Well, I know tonight must be pretty hard on you and your dad. I just came by to see how you're holding up. [Phone ringing] Jennifer: Come on, jj. Pick up. [Line rings] [Phone ringing] [Dramatic music] [Sweeping music] Male announcer: Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives. [Monitor beeping] Abe: Shouldn't you two be at jennifer's? Doug: How's theo? Valerie: No change. Julie: No change yet. But he's strong, like his father. I have faith he's gonna come back to us. Doug: We'd love to have both of you come join us at the horton christmas eve party. Abe: [Sighs] You know... I won't pretend that this year is like any other. You have your party. My place is here, with my son. [Phone rings] [Phone button beeps] Jj: Hi, mom. Jennifer: Hey! Hi. I was worried when you didn't pick up. Jj: I was actually just about to call you. I was thinking that I'd-- I'd just have a quiet evening alone. Jennifer: Honey, are you sure? Jj: I'm sure. I'm just tired. I'll come by for christmas morning, though. Merry christmas, mom. Jennifer: Okay. Well, merry christmas, baby. I love you. Jj: I love you too. And, mom? [Fire crackling] Jj: Thank you for being there. I've got to go now. Jennifer: Okay, bye. Jj: Good-bye. [Sniffling] [Soft, melancholy music] Gabi: Hi. [Dramatic music] Will: [Clears throat] So just how many hortons are gonna be at this party? Maggie: Uh, well, I guess that depends on how you define a horton. Will: Ah. Sonny: I promise I will stand right by your side. This way, if you're confused on who is who or who you're related to... Will: Oh. Hey, arianna. Sonny: Really? Okay, listen up, everyone. We have a christmas emergency. Abigail: Every christmas I spend with you and thomas is a gift, and you are not eating santa's cookies. Chad: Somebody's got to make it look real. Otherwise, thomas will think that santa didn't come. Abigail: Chad dimera, are you saying that you don't believe in santa claus? Chad: Um, the pr department would advise me not to answer that question, especially so close to me coming back as ceo. Abigail: And how to make a big splash with the news. You are so in trouble. Chad: What, a big splash? Abigail: Yes. Chad: What big splash? Abigail: Well, I was thinking we could maybe throw a big new year's eve party and invite our friends and our family and the media. You are so mean. Chad: Are you sure that's such a good idea with everything going on with theo? Abigail: Um, I don't know. I guess I'm still hoping that he's gonna have some kind of christmas miracle, like I did. Chad: That's what we're hoping for. Abigail: Especially jj. The guilt's killing him. You can keep that one. Jj: What are you doing? Gabi: Well, I heard they cleared you of any wrongdoing in theo's shooting. Jj: Yeah. Gabi: I'm so happy for you. Jj: I was just about to go out. Gabi: Well, this is not gonna take long. I brought you something. Actually, arianna made this for you, and she told me that she could not wait until christmas to give it to you. Jj: Well, that's very thoughtful, but can I open it later? There's just someplace I need to be. Gabi: Yeah, your mom'S. I'm gonna go there too. We can walk together. Jj: No, I'm not going to my mom'S. Gabi: Why not? Why are you in your dress uniform? Rafe only wears his for weddings and funerals. Jj, are you--are you all right? Is everything okay? What-- Jj: It's been a long day. Gabi: What are all of these? What is this? Jj: Gabi. Gabi, that's none of your business. Gabi: Yeah, well, this has my name on it, so it's--I definitely think it's my business. Jj: Gabi, you were not supposed to-- Gabi: It's a-- is a flash drive in there? What is this? [Ominous music] Please, just--please tell me this is not what I think this is. Jj: Gabi-- Gabi: Jj, is-- is this a good-bye letter? Is this-- is this a suicide note? (Vo) more "doing chores for mom" Julie: Abe. This has been devastating for all of us. The carvers and the hortons, we've been friends forever. We're in this together, abe. Abe: No. No, no, julie, we're not in this together. This is---this is my son lying in this bed. Jennifer's son is the one who put him there. Doug: We understand, abe. Maybe next year. Valerie: Thank you for the invitation. Doug: Sure. Sweetheart, let's give them their space. [Melancholy music] Julie: We're praying for him... and for you. Eli: I heard jj was cleared and reinstated. I can't imagine your dad's too happy about that. Lani: No. He's not. Eli: How do you feel about it? Lani: My dad wants me to hate jj. But I don'T. Eli: Well, I'm headed over toennifer'S. You're welcome to come. Lani: Thank you. But I need to be here with my dad. Eli: Yeah, yeah. I understand. Well, tell your dad we're all thinking about him. Merry christmas, lani. [Soft music] Gabi: Tell me the truth. Jj, were you-- were you planning to kill yourself tonight? Jj: Please, just go. Gabi: Oh, my god, you were. I can't believe this. What--what--what would have happened if I didn't show up when I did, huh? Jj: I really wish you hadn'T. Gabi: Jj, come on. You know that this is not the answer. I mean, you have so much to live for, so many people that love you. Jj: And just as many people who would be glad to see me dead. Gabi: No, that's not true. Nobody wants that. Jj: Have you talked to-- have you talked to abe lately? Maybe you could ask theo. Gabi: The investigators ruled that you did nothing wrong, that you did what any officer would do in that situation. Jj: I shot an unarmed man. I need to pay for that. Gabi: No. No, what you need to do is forgive yourself, okay? Jj, I know-- I kn-- I know exactly where you are right now. Jj: You couldn't know that. How could you know that? Gabi: Because I've been there when I was in prison. I thought about ending it. I even sat down, and I wrote letters like these. But I realized that ending that pain and guilt was just gonna cause more pain and guilt for the people that I loved. Jj: Yeah, but this is-- this is different. You shot nick because you were scared. Gabi: So were you. Look, the night I almost took my own life, I was-- I was low, okay? As low as probably any human being can be. But I still thought about all the things that I would miss: My family, my friends, arianna's laugh. And I thank god every day that I made the choice that I did, because-- because I get to see the people that I love. Jj, you--you're one of my best friends in the entire world. And arianna loves you. My daughter loves you. She would be devastated if you were gone. She just got will back after-- after two years of thinking that he was gone forever. And now he doesn't even remember her. Please. Do not make her lose another person that she loves. Please. [Dramatic music] Will: You're worried that santa's not gonna bring me any presents because I just moved here? Arianna: But, daddy, you could have my presents. Will: I can have your presents? What about you? Arianna: I got you. Will: Oh, my-- ari, that's the most generous thing that I have ever heard. Thank you. But I have a better idea. How about we share your presents so we can, you know, play with them together? Arianna: Awesome! Will: Awesome? Maggie: Well, that sounds awesome to me too. Arianna, let's go get your coat for the party, okay? Victor, he's got a bad cold, so he's staying here. And you know what that means? More donuts for us. Yay! Sonny: She's an amazing little girl. Will: Yeah. She's my amazing little girl. Rafe: Hey, ciara. Ciara, your mom said that you had something you wanted to tell her about me. Ciara: Did she? Rafe: Yeah. So what was it? If hope ever found out that you and I slept together, it would destroy everything. [Dramatic music] Rafe: So your mom got the sense that whatever it was you were going to say to her about me wasn't a good thing. Ciara: Interesting she'd say that. Rafe: Yeah. So what was it? Shawn: Merry christmas, everyone. Hey. Rafe: Hi. Claire: Merry christmas. Rafe: Merry christmas. Belle: Hey, how are ya? Mwah! Good to see yoU. Rafe: You too. Claire: Hi. Rafe: Hi. Ciara: I got to go. Claire: This should be a fun night. Shawn: Everything okay, rafe? Rafe: Huh? Oh, yeah, great, great. Yes. Just great. Jj: I don't want to hurt ari or you or anyone else. Gabi: That's exactly what you would be doing, okay? I know. I know that you are in terrible pain-- Jj: You think I am in pain? What about abe? What about theo, who will never get to hang an ornament on an tree or get married or have children? Be in some small, horrible little room with machines keeping him alive. You talk about the moments that I'll miss, but how can I keep on living? How can I let myself have those moments when theo never will? Abe: My precious son. I want to believe that you're-- you're gonna wake up. You're gonna open your eyes any minute, and you're gonna say, "dad, it's okay. I'm okay." [Crying] I want to believe that. I want to believe that with my whole heart. But I can'T. [Sobbing] God help me! I can'T. [Sobbing] Gabi: I can't stop-- I can't stop you from blaming yourself for theo's shooting, but I can tell you what this would do to the people that you care about. Jj: They don't need me. Gabi: Of course they do! Are you kidding me? My god, do you-- do you not remember-- look at me-- how broken your mom was when she thought that your sister was gone? She's already been through hell losing your dad. Look at me! Look at me. You are everything to your mom. You are your mother's heart and soul, you and your sister. I mean, if you--if you died, it would kill her, jj. [Solemn music] Abigail: So jj's not coming? Jennifer: No. I tried to convince him, but he said he wasn't really feeling up to it tonight. Abigail: But he should be here with his family. Jennifer: I know he should. Maybe we can try to call him in a little while, okay? Chad: Hey. Rafe: Hey. Where's gabi? Eli: She said she'd meet me here. She should be here by now. Maggie: Hi, everyone. Merry christmas! [People all talking] Sonny: I know there's gonna be a lot of strange faces, but they're all friendly, I promise, okay? And they're gonna be very happy to see you. Will: Okay, well, just stay close, okay? Sonny: I will always stand by your side. Will: Thanks. Sonny: Always. Will: Okay, thanks. Hope: Hey, sweetheart. Claire: Hi. Kate: Have you been to see theo tonight? Claire: Yes, I was with him earlier, but abe told me to go be with my family, so... Kate: Well, I'm glad that you're here. Merry christmas, sweetheart. Claire: Oh, thanks. You too. I'm gonna go back there after I hang my ornament, though. I know he needs me. Kate: Yeah. [Glass smashes] Claire: Hey, ciara. That was my ornament. Ciara: Was it? Oops. Kate: Ciara. No, claire-- Claire: This is your ornament. Kate: No. [Glass smashes] Claire: Oops! Ciara: You are gonna be so sorry you did that. Before I had the shooting, Kate: Ciara. Claire. That is enough. Kate: What are you doing? Shawn: It looks like we have a new holiday tradition. This is the second year in a row the two of you wanted to brawl. Jennifer: Okay, well, that was super exciting. Um, should we hang the other ornaments? Eli: Gabi isn't here yet. Julie: Oh, we'll find one for her. We really should get started. Jennifer: Yeah, we should. Would you like to say something, please? Doug: I would. Yes, I would like to say something. Despite the adolescent fireworks, it takes a christmas like this to make you realize just how blessed we are to have the family that we have and the friends that we have. Julie: I know all of you are joining doug and me in praying for theo's recovery. Doug: And I would like to say how grateful we are that will is back in our lives. Shawn: Yes. Sonny: Hear, hear. [Someone whistles] Julie: And I want to welcome eli, his first christmas with the family, his family. Eli: Thank you. Julie: You know, in my grandparents' day, tom and alice started a family tradition. When we all gather around to decorate the tree, you see, and we each hang our ornament, we take a moment to appreciate each other, eli, all of us... and to remember the dear ones who have gone before us. So, my dear, how would you like to hang the first ornament tonight? Eli: Me? Really? Doug: Yes, please do. Eli: I'd love to. Julie: Great, great. Here they all are. Our family. Hark the herald angels sing glory to the newborn king peace on earth and mercy mild god and sinners reconciled joyful, all ye nations, rise join the triumph of the skies with angelic host, proclaim christ is born in bethlehem hark the herald angels sing glory to... Jj: I know that this will hurt my mom, but she has a lot of people around her she can lean on. Since the day my dad died, all I've caused her is heartbreak. I cannot stand to disappoint her any longer. Gabi: You've not disappointed her, and you haven't cause her heartbreak. Her heart is only broken when she thinks yours is. The only disappointment is when --when she knows that you're not happy, okay? She's so proud of you, jj. She's so proud of the man that you are, because you're a good man, a good friend, a good son, and because she's your mom. Jj: Thank you for trying, gabi. And I know you're the type of person that doesn't give up on someone. Gabi: Jj-- Jj: But I can't do it anymore. You need to let me go. Gabi: What? Wait, I'm--I'm not gonna let you go. Oh, my god, jj, please. Jj: This is the same gun I used to shoot theo. Gabi: Please don't do this, okay? Jj: I am leaving now, and you are not going to follow me. Gabi: I'm not-- where are you gonna go? Jj: To the square, to where I shot him. (Vo) more "doing chores for mom" Jennifer: I just--I feel like I should have forced the issue. I feel like I should have pushed for jj to come tonight. Abigail: Mom, you did the right thing. He has to want to be here. Where are you going? Jennifer: I cannot stand here and do nothing. Valerie: Hey, lani. Lani: Hi. Valerie: If you wanted to head home or over to the hortons', I'm gonna be here with your dad. Lani: Thank you, but I think this is where I need to be. Valerie: Well, have you spoken to jj? Lani: We broke up. He doesn't want to see me. Valerie: Yeah, I don't believe that. Lani: No, he's pushing me away. Valerie: Well, maybe you need to push back. Lani: Then that wouldn't be fair to my dad. Valerie: Lani, nobody knows better than I do how angry your father is right now, but do you really think theo would want to see you unhappy and alone? Of course not. He'd want you to be with the man you love. So don't let jj go without a fight. Jj: I am asking you to move out of the way. Gabi: No. No, you were right. I don't give up on the people that I love, okay? And I will fight for you with my last breath. Jj: What are you doing? Gabi: You know, if you don't want to listen to my words, then you're gonna listen to your own words. "Dear abigail, when we were little, everything seemed too simple. We could sing some dumb song I made up and get you to laugh. I hoped that someday I could teach thomas how to play. This one's for thomas. I hope you'll find someone to teach him to play since I won't be able to." Let's see. "Dear lani, you never got a chance to open your birthday present that night because of what happened, so I want you to know that I got you tickets to see rihanna. I know how much you love her. I was looking forward to that concert. I had a lot of plans for us for what we could do in chicago and not just in chicago; I had a lot of plans for our future. I want you to know that I was telling the truth that night, that I do love you." Jj: Please stop. Gabi: "Dear mom-- dear mom, it's christmas eve, and you just called. I'm ashamed to say that I didn't pick up. I know you want to hear me say that I'm okay, but I can't tell you that. I do want you to know that you're the best mom that I could have ever asked for and that I'm sorry that you had to lose so much, you had to do so much on your own, and I'm sorry I couldn't help you more." Jj: Gabi-- Gabi: "Dear gabi, thanks for the card and for thinking of me on christmas. It was only a couple years ago that we were just getting to know each other and you were asking me about paige. Paige's music is really all we have left of her, okay? She wrote these songs for me, but I want you to have them, and I want you to know how-- how--I want you to"-- god, I can'T. "Dear theo"-- Jj: Please stop! S-stop. Gabi: You didn't open your gift from ari. I'm gonna open it for you. Here, look. Look at what she got you. She made this for you. [Soft music] Jj: [Crying] Gabi: Look. You don't have to decide the rest of your life right now, okay? All you have to decide is to get through tonight, okay? Jj. It's okay. It's okay. Sonny: Well, we should get some sleep. Ari's gonna wake up ridiculously early to open up her presents. So have a good night. Will: Wait. Don't go. Chad: Any other gifts to be wrapped? Abigail: No, that's the last one. But I do know one gift that needs to be unwrapped. Chad: Well, that's what? Abigail: Me. Abe: [Sighs] Thank you. Thank you for being there for my son. [Gentle music] Claire: Merry christmas, theo. Jennifer: Hello, abe. Abe: I have nothing to say to you. Jennifer: Than you can just listen, because I have something to say to you. Jj: What do I do now? Gabi: Well, first let's get you out of this room, yeah? It's--it's christmas eve, so we can go to your mom'S. Maybe the party's still going. Yeah? Jj: No, I--I can'T. I can't see anyone, not tonight. Gabi: Well, eli's waiting for me, and we have so many people waiting for you, so-- Jj: Gabi, I can't see anyone. Not tonight. You could go. Gabi: Well, if you're not gonna go, then I'm not gonna go either. I'll stay here. Jj: I don't have anywhere for you to sleep. Gabi: That's okay. I'll sleep on a chair, on the floor, something. I'll figure it out. Just give me a t-shirt. All I have to do is send a text, so... jj. I will stay with you as long as I have to, okay? Look, we're gonna-- we're gonna wake up tomorrow, and things are gonna look different. But most importantly, we're gonna wake up tomorrow, and it's gonna be christmas morning, and you're still gonna be here. ["Silent night" playing] [People talking and laughing] Doug: Merry christmas. Julie: Is that gabi? Where is she? Eli: Yeah, she said something came up. Jj: [Sighs] Gabi: There you go. Thank you for letting me borrow the t-shirt. Definitely would have been uncomfortable in that dress. Jj: Thank you. Thank you for everything. Gabi: Come on. Lie down. Get in. Get comfortable. Jj: Merry christmas. Gabi: Merry christmas, jj.