The question of paternity still looms over JT and Brad; JT waiting alone prepares to drown his sorrows in alcohol, but is saved by Colleen. Brad is being banned by "The Great Victor Newman" from seeing Victoria and the baby. Brad outraged shares with Victor, that once he is confirmed as the "baby's daddy" he will do everything in his power to keep Victor away. Glo, Glo, Glo caught in a rock and a hard place decides she will marry Jeffrey, but there's a condition; he must convince people that he has fallen madly and deeply in love with her. Michael and Lauren are becoming suspicious wondering why all the sudden they are so chummy. They lean on Kevin who refuses to leak any information. The baby's bloodstream is returning back to normal; carbon dioxide free. Last Week's Recaps
[Telephone rings] Brad: Hey, Honey. Colleen: Hey. I just finished work. Are you at the hospital? Brad: No, actually, I'm out at the Newman's. I wanted to spend some time with Victoria. Colleen: Where are you heading after? Brad: To the hospital. I wanna see the baby. Colleen: Okay, well, I'll meet you there. Brad: Oh, you don't have to do that. You've been on your feet all day. Why don't you go home? Colleen: No, no, no, no, I was planning on going anyway. Um, did you eat? 'Cause I can bring you something. Brad: Actually, I did eat. Hey, I'm supposed to be the one who worries about you. Colleen: I'm worried about you. And I'm worried about the baby. I can't believe that that little guy might be my brother. Brad: Yeah. Well, we'll know soon enough. Colleen: You seem pretty calm about it. Brad: Well, I have to be. What good does it do to lose my cool? I just hope things turn out the way I want them to. Colleen: Yeah, me, too. I just wish it didn't have to break J.T.'s heart. [SCENE_BREAK] Neil: Victor. Victor: Hey, Neil. Neil: Hi. I thought I'd come by and see how you're doing. Victor: Well, I appreciate it, man. Neil: So how's it going? Victor: A little scare earlier. He couldn't breathe. So they... you know, gave him one of those cardiopulmonary gizmos. Neil: Right. Victor: It forces air into the lungs, I guess. Neil: Sure. Did it help? Victor: I think it did. I'm waiting for an update. Neil: Wow. Victor: Yeah. Neil: You know, when it's your kid or... your grandkid in trouble, or both, I... everything else pales. Victor: Breaks your heart, I can tell you that. Neil: Mm-hmm. If you don't mind, I'll-- I'll wait with you. Victor: Sure, man, I'd appreciate it. Neil: Okay. [SCENE_BREAK] Kevin: You got anything to make that a little stronger? Gloria: Alcohol is a depressant. Kevin: Really? Gloria: I don't need to be more depressed. Kevin: Then do something about it, Mom. Get angry. Anything! Gloria: What's the point? I gotta marry the guy. All you have to do is get used to the idea. Kevin: Are you? Gloria: Trying. Kevin: Why? Gloria: Because I don't want you or me or your brother going to prison. Good enough reason? Kevin: Mom, Jeff isn't even sure we know anything! He's bluffing! Gloria: I am not risking any of us going to jail. Kevin: Well, at least I'd finally have a normal relationship with my girlfriend. Gloria: The guy has to be shut up and it seems this is the only way. Kevin: Unh-unh. There is another way to shut a guy up. Gloria: No. Don't even. Kevin: One phone call. Gloria: Stop. The point is to stay out of jail. Kevin: Fine. Fine. Then just write Jeff a check. Give the money. Do it now before you get John's inheritance. Gloria: He knows about John. The bastard wants it all. Kevin: Mom, this is not like you to give up this easily. Gloria: Who said I'm giving up? I'm just now finally getting my inheritance and handing it over to him. I'm just trying to buy some time to figure out what I am going to do. That's why I'm saying yes. [SCENE_BREAK] Lauren: Here we go. Michael: Oh, here we go. Here we go. Lauren: You need help? Michael: We bought out every store in the-- I know that look. What were you talking about? Gloria: We were just saying peace on earth goodwill to men. Lauren: Uh-huh. Michael: Excuse me. Gloria: No, I asked Jill to donate Jabot Cosmetics to a shelter for battered women. You know, raise their self-esteem. Christmas and all. Lauren: Yeah? That's quite wonderful. Kevin: Yeah, Mom was actually thinking of tying it in with the Faces of Jabot campaign. Michael: Oh, a little less charitable, but business is business. Gloria: Why do you think Jill loved it so much? Cocoa, Lauren? Lauren: No. In fact, I'm gonna go change Fenmore. Come on, Sweetheart. Gloria: How about you, Michael? Have some cocoa. Michael: Uh, maybe later. I have got to hide these. Kevin: Hey, show us what you got. Gloria: You know we're just gonna peek anyway. Michael: Hmm. Good luck. This year I'm locking 'em up. Gloria: And I know how to pick a lock! Michael: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kevin: Mother, that was so good it was almost frightening. Gloria: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's for their own good. I don't want them to know Jeffrey's pressuring me. Kevin: Well, that's gonna be a hard secret to keep after he makes the big announcement, which you know he's gonna do. Gloria: Yeah, well, don't be so sure. Kevin: How do you plan on stopping him? Gloria: Watch. Watch. Watch. Watch. Watch. Watch. Watch. Kevin: Okay, hold up. Why don't you run your little skit by me, because somehow now I'm involved. Gloria: I would if we were all by ourselves. Give me that. I need to make this phone call and get out of here. Jeffrey, hi, it's Gloria. Wish I could say the same thing. We need to talk. Fine. Half-hour. I'll meet you there. Kevin: You sure you don't want me to get rid of this guy? All I have to do is make one phone call to Hector-- Gloria: Honey, I appreciate the sentiment, but dark Kevin equals reckless Kevin. Kevin: And what does dark Gloria equal? Let me take a guess. Jail time? Gloria: No. I think my little plan is going to work just fine without any problems. Kevin: Okay. I'll believe that when I see it. Why don't you just run the gist of it by me? Gloria: Honey, Honey, Honey, all you have to do is make sure that Michael and Lauren stay as far away from the club as possible, okay? Kevin: Yeah. [SCENE_BREAK] (Doorbell rings) J.T.: Go away! (Knock on door) J.T.: What the hell do you want? Go away! Colleen: Uh, J.T., it's me! (Knock on door) Colleen: J.T.? Colleen: Hi. [SCENE_BREAK] Gabby: Mr. Carlton? Brad: Hey, Gabby, how are you? Something wrong? Is this not a good time? Gabby: Mr. Newman isn't home. Brad: That's okay. I'm just gonna be a few minutes. Gabby: Well, we were told you're not allowed to see Victoria if Mr. Newman isn't here. Brad: By Mr. Newman? Gabby: I'm sorry. [SCENE_BREAK] Victor: Apparently they found some carbon dioxide in the baby's blood which gave Brad Carlton the idea to jump on a paternity test. Neil: Mmm. So do you wanna know? Victor: For Victoria's sake, mm-hmm. Neil: When will the results be in? Victor: A day or two. The only positive thing is that we might find out that Carlton is not the father. That'd be nice to know. (Cell phone buzzing) Neil: Right. [SCENE_BREAK] Victor's voice: Leave me a message. I will return your call. Brad: That son of a bitch. [SCENE_BREAK] Colleen: So blueberry, crumb topping, I forgot the ice cream, though. J.T.: It's fine. Colleen: You don't feel like pie? J.T.: No, not really. Not right now. Colleen: Have you even eaten dinner? Well, we can make something. Or I can order, and then we can have pie, if you want. It'll be a fun night in. J.T.: You know what, Colleen? I'm really-- I'm just not in the mood for fun, okay? Colleen: Well, force yourself. You'll thank me later. J.T.: What are you doing here? Colleen: I'm being a friend. J.T.: A friend? A friend? Colleen: Yeah. 'Fraid so. My dad told me about the test. And I figured you'd be holed up somewhere, waiting. Pretty much a mess. J.T.: Thanks. Colleen: Friends do stuff like that. I'd expect you to. J.T.: Well, that wouldn't happen. You're never a mess. Colleen: Selective memory. I like that. J.T.: Wouldn't you rather be with the professor right now? Colleen: He is teaching tonight. Or else he would be here, too. J.T.: Oh, that's great. A party. Colleen: Well, it's better than sitting here in the dark. I mean, great way to make yourself feel worse. J.T.: You know what? I don't think the lights are really gonna make much of a difference right now. Colleen: What about me? J.T.: You're not going anywhere, are you? Colleen: Unh-unh. Nope. You are stuck with me. J.T.: Well, at least you're consistent. You've been stubborn since the day I met you. Colleen: You couldn't get rid of me then, and you can't get rid of me now. I'm afraid you're just gonna have to live with it. J.T.: A fun night in. All right. Colleen: I think I would start by taking a long, hot shower. J.T.: Hold on a second. What makes you think I need a shower? Colleen: Because you smell. J.T.: Blunt and stubborn. Wow, what a catch. Colleen: Go. You'll feel better. Go. J.T.: All right. J.T.: All right. [SCENE_BREAK] Victor: Neil. Listen, you don't have to stay. Neil: Oh, come on, where else would I be? Victor: How about with your family? Neil: My family? Victor: Yeah. Neil: College kids-- they don't wanna hang out with their dad. I'm not quite cool enough. Victor: (Chuckles) Neil: You had anything to eat yet? Victor: I don't feel like eating at all. I have no appetite. Neil: Yeah, I can relate. I remember being down the hall when Victoria gave birth the first time. I didn't have much of an appetite. Victor: Mm-hmm. Yeah, the two of you always were fond of each other, weren't you? Neil: Mm-hmm. I still am very fond of her. Victor: Yeah. Sometimes I think Victoria has the best qualities of both her parents. At least I like to think so. Neil: Well, take credit. I do with mine. Victor: Hmm. Until they infuriate you. Neil: Right. Yeah, and be rude to the woman that you're, uh, interested in. Victor: That ever happen to you? Neil: Oh, yeah. And that's when they are somebody else's kids. Victor: Oh, yeah. Yep, I know of what you speak. Victoria so much wants to be a mother. Victor: Look at that fragile creature with all those wires. Neil: Yeah. You know, Victor, it's scary as hell, but this, too, shall pass. The moment will come, mark my words, when Victoria wakes up and she's gonna hold him and kiss him and let him know how much he means to her. Victor: Yeah. Hmm. You know, I was so focused on saving Victoria that I... didn't pay much attention to that little boy, but now that he is alive and breathing, I cannot imagine life without him. Neil: Yeah. Victor: Hi, Doctor. How is he? Doctor: The c-pap's doing its job. The levels of carbon dioxide in his bloodstream are returning to normal. Victor: Well, that's nice to know. Can I see him? Doctor: Definitely. Victor: Thank you. Doctor: Go on in. Victor: Okay. Would you mind telling Nikki that everything is all right? Neil: Absolutely, of course. Victor: Thank you. Neil: Sure. Victor: Hi. Thank you. Look at you. You... you look a little bit like your mother, don't you? Uh-huh. Yeah, you do. She would love to see you. She'd be so happy to see you. But you know, I have a message from her. I'm supposed to tell you that she loves you very much. Okay? That's right. You hang in there. You hang in there. [SCENE_BREAK] Brad: Doctor, excuse me. How's--how's the baby doing? Is he breathing on his own again? Doctor: I'm sorry, Mr. Carlton, I can't divulge that information. You're gonna have to speak to the child's guardian, Mr. Newman. Brad: Newman. Yeah, I know. [SCENE_BREAK] Gloria: Which ones? Kevin: What? What does it matter, Mom? The guy is blackmailing you. Gloria: No reason not to accessorize properly. Men notice things like that. Kevin: No, we don't. Gloria: Oh, really? You speak for all men now? Kevin: Uh, not Jeff. Hey, I got it. Why don't you wear some big pearls to remind him of how rich you really are? This way, he can look forward to how much money he's gonna get. Gloria: I think the diamonds. John gave them to me. Kevin: Diamonds, sapphires, what does it matter? You know, he's probably just gonna try and steal 'em when you're not looking! Gloria: Would you please be quiet? I don't want Michael and Lauren to hear this. And I don't know why you are getting so worked up. I'm the one that should be upset. I finally get everything I want, and Jeffrey's trying to take it away from me. I mean, I really shouldn't have to work this hard. Michael: Where are you going? Gloria: Out. Michael: Please tell me that Jeffrey Bardwell isn't involved in this equation. Gloria: No. You inspired me. I'm going Christmas shopping. Michael: Trying to impress the salespeople into giving you a discount? Gloria: Women in my position should always look their best even when they're shopping. Right, Kevin? Kevin: Yeah. Gloria: No reason not to look good. Michael: As long as it keeps you out of trouble. Gloria: Michael, you're so cynical. Good-bye, Kevin. Call me if you need me. Kevin: Can I help you? Michael: You tell me. Michael: I have every reason to be a cynic. Kevin: And I don't? We have the same mother. Michael: What are you up to? And don't tell me nothing. I heard you whispering. I was standing right there and that pathetic attempt to keep looking at your own computer monitor-- and I know about this secret language you two think that you share. Nine times out of ten you couldn't be more obvious. So, um... why don't you just... get it off your chest? I'd rather hear it from you than the district attorney. Kevin: Paranoid much? Michael: Listen, I'm gonna ask you this question one more time, and then I'm gonna throw you out that-- Kevin: I promised I wouldn't ruin the surprise. Michael: I won't be blind sided. It is your moral obligation as my brother to protect me from taking a hit. Kevin: Fine. Fine, you wanna know? You wanna know? It's your Christmas gift, okay? It is a shiny new cell phone from an innovative company whose identity shall remain nameless. Are you happy now? Or should I pull up a picture, too? Michael: You wouldn't dare make something up just to appease me? Kevin: Look, Mom will kill me if she finds out that you know about this. So now it is your moral obligation not to rat me out. Michael: She won't find out. Kevin: All right. Well, act surprised. She's been talking about this damn thing for a month. Lauren: Oh, I am starving from all that Christmas shopping. Anyone else hungry? Kevin: I could eat. Michael: Oh. I'll get the menus. Lauren: Honey, let's go out. Michael: Yeah? Lauren: Yeah. Michael: You in? Kevin: Sure. Michael: Uh, the club? Kevin: Ooh. Lauren: Ooh, yeah. Pasta. Kevin: Mnh-mnh. No. Lauren: What do you mean, no? Kevin: Why don't we, uh, try someplace new? There's a new Thai place. Michael: No, I feel like eating Gina's cooking. Lauren: Yeah. Michael: Oh, let me take a shower first, please. Lauren: What do you mean? Michael: Quick shower. Lauren: No, no, no, I wanna get in the shower. Michael: Oh, yeah? Lauren: Can I, too? Michael: Yeah? I'll race ya! Lauren: I'm gonna get in there! Kevin: It's your personal flying monkey calling and you don't answer the phone? Well, guess what? We're coming to the club for dinner. Tried to talk 'em out of it, couldn't do it. See you soon. [SCENE_BREAK] Brad: How long's Victor been in there? Neil: Not long. The doctor said it was okay for him to go in a little while ago. Brad: What else did he say? Can they take him off the c-pap? Neil: No, they're keeping him on it. Carbon dioxide levels have come down, but the doctor's optimistic. Brad: I appreciate you telling me. [SCENE_BREAK] Victor: I admire your strength, little boy. You're fighting for your life. You just hang in there. The world can be a dark place, but you'll conquer it, just the way I did. Nothing will stand in your way. I'll stand right beside you to make sure that no one or nothing does, all right? We'll fight 'em together. You bet. You hang in there now. [SCENE_BREAK] Jeff: Good evening. Gloria: Maybe for those bilking wealthy widows. Jeff: Well, you're the one who marries rich men right before they die. Gloria: And your point? Jeff: You're lucky? Gloria: Good answer. Jeff: Speaking of... what's your answer? Gloria: Depends. What exactly do you expect from me? I mean, are we going to live in the same house? Are we going to share the same bedroom? Jeff: Afraid you'll be tempted? Gloria: Only to buy twin beds. Jeff: You're stalling. Gloria: I'm not. These are legitimate concerns. The least, you can put my mind at ease. Jeff: I won't send you to prison. How's that? Gloria: Oh, great, you gonna hang that over my head? Won't live like that. Jeff: Well, I'll tell you what. With your money you can build us a big house with separate wings. We'll never have to see each other. In fact, you can even mail me my weekly allowance. Gloria: I'm not wasting my fortune on you. Jeff: I just want you to keep me in comfort. We can work out the details before the I dos. Gloria: You really are a nasty little man, you know that? Jeff: You hate me already. See? We should be married. Gloria: Mm-hmm. All right. I'll marry you. One condition. Jeff: I'm listening. Gloria: You have to fall in love with me. Or at least convince the entire world that you love me. Otherwise, it won't work. Because I marry for love. And this marriage can't be any different. Otherwise, people will question your motives. Jeff: All right, I'm in. Gloria: And until we succeed, no announcement. Jeff: Well, I won't be able to keep my hands off you. When do we start? Gloria: No time like the present. Jeff: Ah! [SCENE_BREAK] Colleen: Hey. Feel better? J.T.: Yeah, yeah, a little bit. Thanks for cleaning the place up. Colleen: No problem. Um, dinner is in the oven, but it's gonna take awhile. J.T.: Well, uh, hopefully, your cooking has improved since last time. Colleen: Well, I can't mess this one up. J.T.: Oh, I've heard that one before. Colleen: So what do you wanna do till it's ready? J.T.: You know what? I don't--I don't really know if I wanna do anything right now. Colleen: Well, I brought a movie. J.T.: Let me guess, something romantic? Colleen: Well, if you consider poker and James Bond a love story, then-- J.T.: Wait, you brought "Casino Royale"? Colleen: Yes. J.T.: Wow. Colleen: Or we can watch football. J.T.: No. Football? You wanna watch football? Colleen: I will if I have to. J.T.: A movie's fine. Colleen: Okay. J.T.: Hey, where's the-- where's the blanket? What did you do with the blanket? Colleen: Uh, it's-- its right here. I just, uh, I moved it so I wouldn't spill anything on it. J.T.: That's a good idea. Colleen: Was Victoria making that? J.T.: Yeah. Yeah, she used to... sit right here and knit and talk to the baby. She'd mess up every couple minutes, and she would, uh, she'd run this-- this random bunch of words together-- Colleen: Like what? J.T.: Uh, palindrome. Um, widget. And then there was this other one, um... uh, boul--bouleversement, or something like that. I don't even know what it meant. She just said it. Colleen: It's, um... word of the day. J.T.: Is that right? Wow. Colleen: Yeah. J.T.: How'd you know that? Colleen: Are you kidding me? Adrian loves stuff like that. J.T.: Yeah. Well, she said that, um... she said that would give him a big vocabulary one day, and, uh, I guess like Adrian's. Colleen: Well, maybe he'll be a writer. J.T.: A writer? Well, if he's anything like his mom, he's not gonna be a-- be a knitter. You know, um... this was gonna be-- this was gonna be the first gift she gave him. Colleen: It will be the first gift she gives him. J.T.: Yeah. First I gotta bring 'em both home. [SCENE_BREAK] Lauren: Hey, you two. Jeff: Hi. Michael: Whose Christmas present are you? Jeff: (Laughs) Gloria: I just ran into Jeffrey a few minutes ago. Michael: While you were out shopping for a martini? Gloria: I stopped in for a bite. I don't like to shop on an empty stomach. Kevin: It's true. One time she almost passed out. She thinks Christmas shopping is a sport. Jeff: (Laughs) well, I couldn't resist joining this lovely lady. Gloria: We were talking about the holidays and everything that has to be done. Michael: You're not gonna get a lot accomplished in a restaurant. Gloria: What are you all doing here? Lauren: We came to eat. Kevin: I tried calling you, Mom, to see if you wanted to join us, but you didn't answer your phone. Michael: What's the difference? We're all here now. Jeff: Well, join us. We could make it a family dinner. After all, I'm William's brother. Lauren: Oh, you know, the baby is really such a handful. Jeff: No, I don't mind. Kevin: You know, I, uh, if I remember correctly, I forgot to turn the fireplace off. Maybe we should just order our food to go and bring it home? Michael: I turned it off. Jeff: I'll get us a table. Excuse me, Darling. Kevin: Great. Great, we're staying. [SCENE_BREAK] Victor: Did you talk to Nikki? Neil: Yeah, she's gonna be back in a little while, Victor. Victor: All right. Brad: I'm not going anywhere, Victor. Victor: You say what you have to say and then kindly leave. Brad: I went to the ranch. The nurse wouldn't let me see Victoria, but of course, you know that, don't you? You gave the orders. Victor: Why would you wanna see Victoria? You were the one who was willing to let her die. Brad: It wasn't remotely that simple. Victor: It was that simple. Brad: I was standing up for Victoria and what I believe she would've wanted. Victor: You really think you know what she wants, right? Brad: Well, I was married to her, wasn't I? Victor: Okay. Brad: And I wanna see her. Victor: Let me tell you something, you stay away from her. [SCENE_BREAK] Jeff: I've had some experience with that kind of advertising, if you have any questions. Lauren: Oh, well, thank you. Um, but I really like the agency that I'm working with right now. I'll keep you in mind. Michael: Where's our waiter? Kevin: Oh, good idea. Uh, check, please! Jeff: You know what? I should've ordered some champagne to celebrate. Michael: Oh? Gloria: Celebrate what? Jeff: Your inheritance. You were so determined to get what was rightfully yours-- and it paid off. You must be ecstatic. Gloria: Mmm. I am. Lauren: I-I think the baby's tired. Michael: Well, maybe we should get him home. Granny, you can follow us there. Jeff: He's getting so big. How old is he now? Michael: He's one year old. Jeff: Ah, well, happy belated birthday, little guy. Is he walking yet? Lauren: Uh, yeah, and he's into everything. Jeff: I never had kids of my own. I was always "Uncle Jeff" to everybody else's. If you ever need a sitter... Gloria: That's very generous of you. Kevin: You know, we wouldn't wanna ruin the teenage economy. Lauren: Yeah, and you know, he really likes the ladies. (Cell phone ringing) Jeff: Ah. Oh, I'm sorry. I've been expecting this call. Michael: You go right ahead. Jeff: Hello, uh, Mr. Jameson, uh, yeah, I'm just finishing dinner. Could I call you back in about five minutes? Great. Well, thank you, everybody. I've really enjoyed myself. We should do this again soon. Gloria: We will. Jeff: Walk me out? Gloria: Sure. Jeff: Great performance. Keep it up and we'll be Mr. and Mrs. Jeffrey Bardwell before you can say skin burn. Lauren: Why is she still buddying up to him? Michael: Maybe Kevin should field that question. Kevin: How should I know? Michael: Because she confides in you. Kevin: Not this time. Michael: I don't believe you. First she freaks out because he knows about the face cream, now we're having dinner with him? Listen to me, what's going on? Kevin: I just said I don't know. Lauren: And he wants to baby-sit? I mean, what is that? That is creepy. I don't want him anywhere near the baby. Michael: I don't want him around any of us. Especially Gloria. Kevin: Ugh. Blame it on the mistletoe, but I don't think he's going anywhere anytime soon. [SCENE_BREAK] Colleen: Its okay, we don't have to watch it. I'm not really a Bond fan anyway. J.T.: Yeah, I'm sorry. All I can think about is the paternity test. Colleen: Yeah, I know. I would be, too. J.T.: Whatever happens, that's it. You know, I'm--I'm either... I'm either the father, or I'm not. There's no more wishful thinking. No more hoping. And if I'm not... I shouldn't even be talking about this with you. You're probably hoping that the baby's your dad's. Colleen: Yeah, but, J.T., you would be a wonderful dad, too. J.T.: You think? Colleen: Of course. I have seen you with Victoria when she's pregnant, and I've seen you at the hospital. J.T.: I never thought this would be my life. Colleen: J.T. with a kid? Uh, I can't say I saw that coming. J.T.: Yeah. Colleen: But you always did surprise me. (Laughs) J.T.: What? What's so funny? Colleen: I... I can just picture it, you know? You saying that your son can't go out because he has to stay home and study? J.T.: (Laughs) Colleen: I mean, can you imagine? (Oven timer dings) Colleen: The manicotti smells so good. J.T.: Did you get that out of the freezer? Colleen: Yeah, why? J.T.: Why'd you do that? Why--why didn't you order something? Colleen: What? J.T.: Victoria made that before she went to Clear Springs. She learned how to make that pasta from scratch. We were supposed to have it together. [SCENE_BREAK] Neil: Hey, Victor, why don't you go home, get some rest? Victor: I'm not gonna leave this baby alone, Neil. Neil: I'll tell you what, I'll--I'll stay. Brad: You can both go. I'm gonna be here anyway. Victor: That is not happening. Doctor? Is his breathing improving? [SCENE_BREAK] Michael: That's a good boy. Thank you. Michael: Spit it out. Gloria: What are you talking about? Michael: I don't have time to play games with you. What are you doing with Jeffrey? Gloria: Enjoying his company. Lauren: Ugh. Something is going on. You have never liked him. Gloria: I changed my mind. Kevin: Yeah, Mom does that a lot. Michael: No. Not about Jeffrey and certainly not about money. And don't try to say I can't explain it, because that's what your son has been telling me. Stop it! Stop it! See that look? That's the look! You're lying! Gloria: Don't pick on your brother. This has nothing to do with him. Michael: It does if he knows something. Lauren: Just tell us. Gloria: All right. He's intelligent, he's attractive, he reminds me of William. Lauren: No. Gloria: It's only natural that I would, you know, start feeling something for him. Lauren: Gloria... Michael: It is not natural. It is unnatural. You have never trusted the man. You swore up and down that he was after your money. And then, when he pulled out that cold cream, you certainly-- Gloria: Yeah, well, nothing came of it, so maybe I overreacted. Michael: I give up. Lauren: You just-- you just can't be serious about spending time with him. Gloria: Sure I am. He reminds me of William. And I can't just turn off my feelings. Michael: Oh, I wish I knew where that button was. Kevin: She'd just turn it right back on. Gloria: And... I would like Jeffrey to celebrate Christmas with us. Michael: That is it. You have lost-- you have lost your mind. [SCENE_BREAK] Colleen: I wrapped it up and put it in the fridge. I'm really sorry, J.T. J.T.: It's all right. You didn't know. Colleen: Is there anything I can do? [SCENE_BREAK] Neil: Victor, I'm gonna head out now. Um, call me if you need anything, all right? Victor: Neil, thank you for your support, all right? You've been very kind. Thank you. Appreciate it. Neil: Anytime. Victor: Yep. Brad: I'm going in. Victor: What do I have to tell you for you to understand I don't want you near that baby? Brad: Where the hell do you get off telling me what to do? That could be my son in there! Victor: I'm the baby's guardian. I make the decisions. I don't want you near that baby. Brad: If I am the father, I will do everything I can to keep you away from him. [NEXT_ON] Gina: Is this your license plate number? Amber: You hit the assistant D.A.'s car! You idiot!