(CNN) -- Let me begin by saying that if Mr. Martin so much as breathes a word about George Blanda, Earl Campbell or Warren Moon, I win this debate.





Seriously, they are Tennessee Titans (aka ex-Houston Oilers) and, thus, completely off limits when speaking of the Houston Texans.





You may be thinking, "That's an unsporting way to begin an argument."





Well, I'm in a pretty unsporting mood after my Cowboys -- again -- choked down the backstretch, looking more like a team playing Five-Mississippi Rush than one of the greatest sports franchises on Earth.





But they are still Texas' team. Hell, they're America's team. Don't let anyone tell you differently.





Since the glorious days (and hair) of Jimmy Johnson, when Emmitt Smith, Troy Aikman and Michael Irvin owned the NFL -- tallying three Super Bowl victories in the '90s -- the headline has been the same: "Playoff victory escapes Cowboys."





There are two unremarkable exceptions, of course, one being when we pounded Philly by 20 in a 2010 NFC Wild Card bout. That's irrelevant to this conversation, but I wanted to take a shot at those ornery Eagles fans so they'll write hyperbolically nasty things about me below. It's how they roll.





Back to the conversation at hand ... Mr. Martin argues from a relative vantage point. The Cowboys, quite simply, suck lately.





Read why Martin believes Houston is the new face of Texas football





The running backs are like delicate, porcelain dolls. The secondary and o-line look like sieves. Dez Bryant thinks wide receivers get new contracts for spending everything from their first one. Our quarterback ticked off some voodoo priest who now spends his Decembers stabbing the daylights out of his Tony Romo doll.





And the team is owned by a megalomaniac who believes prowess as a college football player and oilman qualify him to be the only NFL owner with a general manager title. This, after two playoff wins in 15 years.





Yet all this negativity does nothing to tilt the Cowboys' crown. It doesn't even scuff the throne. The Cowboys rule Texas, and no 2002 upstarts from Houston enjoying their first playoffs can take that away.





That doesn't mean the Texans haven't done something impressive. Most fans (especially I) would be thrilled to see their team lose its top quarterback, running back, wide receiver, linebacker and cornerback for various stints yet still make the postseason.





It's commendable, but I'm afraid it will come to a Cowboys-esque ending Saturday versus the Bengals. I could be wrong, but Las Vegas isn't exactly inspired when you're favored by three at home.





Win or lose, Houston has a long road to rival the Cowboys, whose eight Super Bowl appearances are tied for most ever. Our five Super Bowl wins are second only to the Pittsburgh Steelers (hurt to write that).





Did I mention Saturday will mark the Texans' first playoff game? Ever? The franchise isn't old enough to have a Hall of Famer.





Our Ring of Honor -- What? No Ring of Honor in Houston? -- is rife with legends. In addition to the aforementioned Triplets of the 1990s, there's Landry, Schramm, Lilly, Renfro, Dorsett, Hayes, Staubach and White.





Those are just the HOFers. I'm not counting Larry Allen, Drew Pearson, Chuck Haley, Cliff Harris, Don Perkins or Don Meredith (and if anyone has a clue how Ed "Too Tall" Jones isn't in the Ring, let me know.)





Though down now, the 'Boys used to be mainstays in the playoffs. In the '70s, it was more common to see them in the NFC Championship than not.





That's when they became America's Team. I know the moniker riles folks up, and it should. If you aren't a Cowboys fan, then your squad isn't America's Team. I'd be sad and envious, too.





Before Packers and Steelers fans start
How many super bowls does the Cowboys have? Which team is called America's team?
three Super Bowl Tennessee Titans
question: How many super bowls does the Cowboys have?, answer: three Super Bowl | question: Which team is called America's team?, answer: Tennessee Titans