LOS ANGELES, California (CNN) -- Michael Jackson feared his father so much he would faint or vomit sometimes when his father entered the room -- even when the pop singer was an adult, according to a book written by a former Jackson confidant.



Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, Michael Jackson's confidant, sat down with the King of Pop and taped 30 hours of interviews.



"The Michael Jackson Tapes" includes Jackson talking about his fear of growing old, his relationship with children, his friendships with Madonna and Brooke Shields, and his remarkable shyness around people that made his surround himself with mannequins.



Jackson opened up to Rabbi Shmuley Boteach for 30 hours of interviews, which were taped nine years ago and intended for a book Jackson wanted written, Boteach said.



"He was trying to reclaim his life," Boteach said Friday in an NBC "Today Show" interview.



Jackson, who died on June 25 of what the coroner found to be a deadly combination of drugs, "lost the will to live, I think he was just going through the motions of life toward the end," Boteach told NBC.



CNN has not independently confirmed Jackson's quotes in the book, but Boteach was known to be a spiritual adviser to Jackson for several years beginning about 1999.



Ken Sunshine, spokesman for the family, including the singer's father, Joe, issued a statement on the book. "We are not going to dignify this with a comment," he said.



The book was not published during Jackson's lifetime because of the pop star's child molestation trial, which ended with an acquittal in 2005, the author said. The author said Jackson's arrest ended any interest in a book about him.



"I don't want to grow old," Jackson is quoted as saying in one interview with Boteach.



"When the body breaks down and you start to wrinkle, I think it's so bad," Jackson said.



Jackson talked to Boteach about why he was drawn to children, especially those who were sick.



"I love them. I love them," he said.



Helping children enjoy their childhood is his mission, Jackson said.



"I feel that this is something really, really in my heart that I am supposed to do, and I feel so loved by giving my love, and I know that's what they need," he said.



Jackson said that while adults "appreciate me artistically as a singer and a songwriter and a dancer and a performer," children "just want to have some fun and to give love and have love and they just want to be loved and held."



Boteach, in an interview about two years before Jackson's November 2003 arrest, asked Jackson about the young cancer patient who would later become his main accuser.



"He's special," Jackson said.



Boteach asked Jackson whether by speaking to people like the boy "part of the pain goes away for them."



"Absolutely," Jackson said. "Because every time I talk to him he is in better spirits. When I spoke to him last night he said, 'I need you. When are you coming home?' I said, 'I don't know.' He said, 'I need you, Michael.' Then he calls me 'Dad.'"



Michael Jackson's taped statements about his father's treatment of him as a child echoed what he has said previously.



"He was rough, the way he would beat you, you know, was hard," Jackson said. "He would make you strip nude first. He would oil you down. It would be a whole ritual. He would oil you down so when the flip of an ironing cord hit you, you know, and, it was just like me dying, and you had whips all over your face, your back, everywhere. And I always hear my mother like, 'No, Joe, you're gonna kill him. You're gonna kill him. No.
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question: What did Jackson tell Rabbi Shmuley Boteach?, answer: "I don't want to grow old," | question: Jacskon told the Rabbi what?, answer: "He was trying to reclaim his life," | question: Was Michael Jackson molested?, answer: 'No, | question: What did the King of Pop say?, answer: "I don't want to grow old," | question: When did Michael JAckson die?, answer: June 25 | question: Former confidant's books is based on how many hours of interviews?, answer: 30 | question: What was name of the Rabbi Jackson confided in?, answer: Shmuley Boteach,