I must have my teddy': what do students need to feel at home?
Accidentally referring to uni as “home” in the presence of Mum and Dad can be the first sign that you have settled in. But the idea of home can be complicated when moving away for the first time.
While university can be an exciting escape from parental authority, it’s common for students to feel uncomfortable in their new surroundings. Students tell us what has made them feel most at home.
I must at all times have Squishy, my teddy
Holly Dorson, 18, who studies French and Spanish at Queen Mary’s, says her bedroom means everything when it comes to feeling settled. “I must at all times have my teddy (he’s called Squishy), photos of my family and friends, and some bunting to remind me of my farm back home,” she says.
“That along with making my room really pretty and organised. I can’t imagine having to come home after a day at uni to somewhere that doesn’t look familiar and presentable.”
I try to be out of my accommodation as often as possible
Sometimes living quarters won’t be so cosy. “I try to be out of my flat as much as possible, says Emily Lafoy, 19, a drama student at Exeter University. She was placed in first-year accommodation which made her mum squirm on her first visit.
Emily says her horrible halls don’t matter since she found her feet getting involved with societies. “It isn’t all about the home comforts or a nice cup of tea; I think it’s also how you manage your free time. That certainly made me forget about my prison cell of a room and the fact that I missed my Mum every now and again.”
I found it too difficult to settle in without a familiar face
“I know university is about meeting new people but I found it difficult to settle in,” says Jake Murphy, 20, who dropped out of psychology at the University of Bristol in his first term. “I didn’t have one familiar face to go out and fully embrace the university lifestyle with.”
Jake has since moved back to his hometown where his girlfriend also lives. “I simply wasn’t compatible with the people around me: personalities clashed, and the vibe just wasn’t right.”
Having my boyfriend both at home and at university is amazing
Camille Jones, 21, studies natural sciences at the University of Birmingham where she suffers from anxiety. Attending the same uni as her boyfriend seems to have helped, however. It’s been “amazing”, she says, “because it means I have a piece of home with me all the time.”
Camille also finds solace with her flatmates. “If you are homesick, reach out to those who you feel closest to. More often than not you can make friends easier than you think you can.”
Home is where your stuff is
Ania Galasinska, 19, who studies English at Loughborough university, found herself caught between two homes in her first year. “Half of your belongings are left back in the house where you grew up, and the other half are in your new room at university. On the one hand you start getting used to living in this new accommodation, and yet it feels natural to go back to my ‘real’ home during the holidays. It can feel like you’re in limbo.”
I just miss my countryside bubble
Lizzie Powell, 22, a history finalist at Manchester University, had never visited the city before applying. The moment she arrived on her first day of fresher’s week, she hated it. “I am a quiet country girl,” she says. “People tell me I am an idiot but I had no idea Manchester was such a party place.
“Living in my little bubble back at home I just thought any uni would do. I never realised they were all so different. Trust me, you want to look around before you decide.”
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It’s frustrating to talk to my family on the phone
Emily Knoles, 19, who studies English at Brighton University, has found the new distance from her family frustrating at times. “Something that seems important to me is met with a ‘hmm’ down the phone, and a change of subject onto something like the new toy the dog has been bought,” she says.
“This happens in the opposite direction as well. I’m ranted to about day-to-day hassles, when all I really want to do is go and make dinner or get on with my essay.”
There’s stigma attached to living with your parents
Matthew Blagdon, 22, at St Mary’s University in London studies drama and lives at home with his mum. “Being able to escape the uni life and come back to the house I have always lived in is invaluable,” he says.
“I love my uni but not staying in halls of residence or a student house has meant that I have saved myself a lot of money. And I have the comfort of a flat-screen TV in the living room. There is stigma attached to staying at home, but at the end of the day, it’s your happiness that counts.”
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