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VOLUME 3.DE8 ARC, ARKANSAS, MAY23, 1868. _iSnUMlAI^H 11.
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PROFESSIONAL CARD8.
Z. P. H. FARR,
ATT or. ITT'-' AT 1 A 7*
LITTLE ROCK, ARKANSAS.
H. !P. Vaughan.
ATTORNEY AT LAV
AND
SOLICITORS in chancery,
J)KS ARC, ARKANSAS.
WILL practice in the Courts of the countie
of Prairie. White, Jackson, Woodruff an
Monroe. Particular attention given to th
collection ofclainuMtny where in the State.
sepTtf.
T. E. E N1 E R SON,
ATTORNEY AT LAW
A*I» GEN ER A I. LAND AGENT
AUSTIN, PRAIRIE COUNTY, AUK.
Special attention given to the collectioi
and securing claims, buying and selling lands
paying taxes, examing titles, &e. april 11
J. R. P, ALDRIDGE,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
Cotton Plant, Arkansas.
Will practice in the Circuit Courts o:
Woodruff county, and the Circuit Courts o’
the seventh Judicial District, and give prompt
attention to all business entrusted to hi,
care. janj*.
n. 8. GANTT. W. J. BBOftAUGH.
GANTT & BRONAUGH,
AT TO IIS SYS AT LAW.
Will practice in the counties of Prairie,
White, Woodruff. Monroe, Arkansas and Pu
laski. Prompt ntttention given to the collec
tion of claims. Taxes will be paid and titlef
investigated fur non-residents. aprl4-3rtt
J E. GATE WOO It, J. S. THOMAS,
GATEWO.B & TH0BIA3,
nr-S 4!tr, ARKANSAS.
TAMES H. PATTEltSOS, LUCIAS C. CAUSE.
4rtyu#la. Ark. Jack*onyort, Ark.
Patterson & Clause,
i\TIORNEYS AT JAW,
Jacksonport and Augusta, Arkansas.
Wl«t practice in the Counties of Woodruff,
j u.j.^0 1: ! •• . i nter. White. It:.’., ren
’ , Cro.*n. Craighead and Cro«a, and
1 special cares in any part of the
Irods either office. inyi.s-h,
i < .1)VS' ‘N^atlicc—West Point, Arkansas.
JN<‘ \l. AlttOllKAOffice—Searcy, Arkansas.
dO\Sl)N^ MOOltE,
Attoraev^vat Law,
,v oin tors i .\\ <c 11A *v CJ-R r,
General Land and Collecting Agents,
SEARCY, ARRAXtSiVs*
Win give prompt attention to any bifjhess
in the counties of Independence, JncuS^n.
Woodruff, Monroe, l'rairie, White, ConwifA
and Van Ituren. mar'.)- v
C Si
a
> Sj &
L,. l”
S & .pt
£ ^ <m
2 1
3 ^
L^,
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b iB*
'
GC
X 0
o 0
o C*4>
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NEW HOTEL
IX DEVALLS BLUFF, ARK.
THE “ATI.AH ilOTKL.”
IS NOW OPEN for tin acconyao
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eively. 'J be Tables will be Supplier
with the choicest the market affords
Our accommodating and genial friend
,T. M. McCllntoek, is proprietor. A1
who patronize him will go awa;
“latighiug fat.” jRUJ*
PROFESSIONAL CAROS.
■ I 1 .
I
SIMON r. IIVOHS9. WM. W. SMITH.
in curs 8c SMITH,
, I ATTORNEYS AT LAW
-AND
' REAL ESTATE AGENTS,
CLARENDON, ARK.
---
. ! SOL. F. CLARK. SAM. W. WILLIAMS.
JOE W. MARTIN.
! CLARK. WILLIAMS ft MARTIN,
Attorneys at Law,
I LITTLE ROCK, ARKANSAS.
WILL practice in all the Courts, prosecute
Claims of all kinds, collect debts, and
I act as Real Estate and General Agents.
Omen—Markham Street, near State House.
april28-tf
I-—
JAMES J. GALLAGHER.
Attorney at Law,
COTTON PLANT, WOODRUFF CO, ARK.
Will practice where called.
sep28-tf.
DR. J. W. BUF.NEY,
Being permanently located at Des Arc, j
will continue the practice of his profession in i
all its branches.
Office at Col. J. M. Burney’s Drug Store. j
DF.. ALLEN
Offers his services to the citizens of
I Des Arc and vicinity in the practice of j
medicine. Thankful for past favors, j
Hull U\ IVUCUUUll 11/ HA AAflAVH,
1 lo share a liberal prtronuge.
Office—At liis residence—late the
residence of W. G. Frith. sep21
DR. ROB’T. B. TREZEVANT, "!
Tenders his professional services (o !
the citizens of Dos Arc and vicinity.
Office—At 11. F. Johnson Drug Store.
scp2l
U-1
Dr. R. B. HELBY,
j TTiENDERS his professional services to (lie
I. CDiaeris of Re# Arc and porrounding ‘
j coumry, in tiie practice of Medicine and Ob- j
stetrics. lie hopes from an experience of
I over fifteen y^ars in Southern practice, to
merit a share of public patronage,
i Office one door East of Hurney’s Drug
j Store. inarohilS- 18‘»8-Iy j
I *
33. 3J1. rTolmson
D HUGGIS T,
DES ARC, ARKANSAS.
KEEP on hand a large assortment of Drugs.
Medicines, Paints, Oils. Perfumery, J
; Patent Medicines, Wines, Brandies, Whiskey,
; for medical purposes, which he will sell low. j
■ Prescriptions and orders filled promptly. 1
j Terms cash. feb. 15, 1868. .
_ _
DRUGrS!
A WELL SELECTED STOCK OF
FRESH DRUGS,
MEDICINES AND CHEMICAS,
.'School nooks and Stationery,
l’ainl SvOils, Dye-Stuffs, Window-Glass, Pcr
; ftitncry,'Talent Medicines. Wince, brandies,;
Whi .key, f.sr medicinal purposes.
Dromgoole ^Celebrated Southern Remedies, j
invariably for coth, at small profits.
julit J. 31. UI’RKEY.
| „ - - - — --— j
w.w. n. connv. ' p- Mc BAE
GOODY & McRA.E,
At? omssraxi At aa w
SEARCY. WHITE COCNTY, !’
AHKAA'SAH.
Will practice in all the courts of Arkansas.
uiay2-l -
F. LEPTIEN,
DttS A LiVJ, AtUVAPIOAO.
I AM NOW PREPARED TO DO ALL
kinds of work in my liuc. Mend
ing, Cleaning, Ac.
— Thankful for pa*t favors, I solicit a
continuance of the patronage heretofore be
stowed on me. feb28-tf
1 rnilE UNDERSIGNED HAYING M
1 opened a House* ol Euler
tainitteni. on Uuena Vista Street, near
the Steamboat Landing, for the accommoda
tion of
TRAVELERS AND BOARDERS,
By the clay, week, <>* month, solicits the pat
ronage of those visiting Dos Arc. The fare
will he as good as the market affords, ami
terms moderate.
Give me a trial, and I will endeavor to giva j
satisfaction.
BIN JAM IN HAY LEY.
Dos Arc, Ark , March 23, IStiT— 12m
1 From the Southern Home Journal.]
THE DEATH OF THE CnRVS
TIA\ WARRIOR,
BY JAMBS IU'SGERFOBD.
j “Let us cross the river, and rest in tb
shade of the trees.”—[Dying words of Stone
wall Jackson.
A hero and Christian laf dying;
The friends in his chamber were hushed
To his faint but calm breathings replying,
Low sobs from their sad bosoms gushed.
Already he seemed with the angels,
So bright his pale features shone;
They were showing him—holy evangels~
Their home, which would soon be bis own
Thus, ere he was silent forever,
The last words he uttered were these:
“Let us cross,” said the hero, “the river,
And rest in the shade of the tress.”
j O’er fields freely fought memory hovered;
He thought of the shade and the breeze;
But the vision by angels discovered
Suggested th« stream and the trees.
Though thinking of duties still, even
While drawing bis last feeble breath,
Yet lie spoke of the life-trees of Heaven,
Beheld o’er the river of death.
Seeing Heaven—his home hence forever.
With angel-companions like these—
“Let us cross,” said the hero, “the river,
And rest in the shade of the trees.”
Then, follow his noble example,
Till life and its conflicts are o’er
And, like his, your reward shall be ample;
When treading eternity’s shore.
Like him, all the wise and good, knowing
The issue is anguish or bliss,
Seek for peace in that blest world, by doing
The warfare of duty in this.
Death’s cold and dark current can never
Have terrors for spirits like these;
They will ovoss, like the hero, the river,
And rest in the shade of the trees.
i.ii’ax joi:.
CHAPTER IV.
Tliat band of prowling redskins,
tkougli quite strong enough for any
ordinary undertaking, had made a
fearful miscalculation, when, instead
of the defenseless train of somo party
of unlucky emigrants, they found
thomsolves confronted by nearly a
score of the deadliest rifles on the bor
der, and, after a brief struggle, they
abandoned their enterprise, riding oil'
with wild yells of rage and di-appoint
ment, though not without carrying
with them the scalps of three of the
faithless teamsters, and some of the
loose horses.
Wild was the wrath of the remain
ing desperadoes when they discovered
the real extent of the stampede.
They at once understood the truth
of the case, for the two Murrays, I.'osa,
the negroes, I.unman, Lipan Joe, and
more than a dozen of the heat horses,
with all their equipments, had disap
peared in a way to leave no doubt of
the cause of their departure.
“Tell yer what,'' said a brawny brute,
who seemed disposed to act as captain,
“it won't never do for that thnr crowd
to git to the fort. I)urn the Indians!
They won't come back for anythin’
more’n they've got, but it won’t ho
long till sun-up, an' we must saddle
right away,”
"And leave the wagons?"
“Reckon nicy'll stay yer till wo git
liack. What's one of yer necks good
for on this frontier if Charlie Lanmau
'its to tell his mates what we fellers
lave been up to ? ’
“The West ain't wide enough for a
man that gits that crowd down onto
him. I’m for trail, an no marry !”
This view of the rase was so clearly
dictated by common sense, that il met
svitli no opposition, and though the
ivagons were ransacked for easily
portable valuables, and the best horses
tvere selected, regardless of ownership,
in the course of half an hour more the
whole gang was eagerly waiting for
jiiough of daylight to enable them to
follow the trail.
Tlie Comanches had carried of all
their wounded, and only two of their
.lead, besides the luckless victim of
Lipan Joe’s prowess, remained upon
die field of battle.
Great was their surprise and rage,
:ioWcvev, when they discovered the
fate o^h, five warriors who had been
lctailem>'(£wait the results of the
itampede on'lie “runaway side” of the
•amp.
Moreover, the suttfiui departure of a
party, seemingly so strong and numer
ous. was an insoluble puzsftfc to the
most cunning brain among them. ■>
The struggle had been really between
Launian, Lipan Joe, aud three, or
rather two, of the hapless squad, for
loe had spoken to them in their own
longue until so near that he aud his
friend were able to strike instant and
fatal blows, and a bowieknife, “driven
home,” rarely fails of its work.
Fired by the hope of revenge, how
ever, the Comanches did their best to
follow the trail of their mysterious
euemies, and so the fugitives, had they
known it, were pursued at the same
moineut by two sepeiate bands of the
most blood-thirsty and terrible sleuth
hounds known to the history ot
violence and crime.
Well was it for them that Lipau Joe
and Lttnman insisted on making the
be3t use of their time, and making their
first start as great an advantage as
possible wh;le darkness still befriended
them.
CHAPTER V.
The bright sun of Texas was in ail
his glory as the fugitives urged their
horses onward over the seemiugly
boundless prairie, and until then little
had been said by either of them. The
returning light, however, seemed to
inspire old Mr. Murray with something
■ like cheerfulness.
“We will now," said he, “make a bee
line for the fort, and we arc safe to
' outrun these rascals."
“The ruffians, perhaps, but I am not
so sure about the Comnnc.hcs. No
. doubt there are other bands in this
direction, and if we could only throw
them off the trail, we could go back
across our own tracks, take our time
about reaching the tort from some
other side."
“But can we do that?”
“Yes: Lipan and I know a good
hiding-place: one, too, that four good
rfles could hold for a long time."
“Call it six,” said llarry. “Pete and ;
Caesar can use a gun like white men.” i
“Good!" said Laman. “That’s a
capital reinforcement.”
Stilt, a negro from Louisiana, in
those days, who could manage a rifle,
was sufficiently uncommon to warrant
a glance of cuHositv at the sinewy
forms and honest, black faces of the
two slaves who rodo behind hint. The
glance was satisfactory, however, and
Lanmnit began to think better of their
chances. Six good rifles make a very
respectable independent party.
. Harry Murray was in earnestconver- :
sation, ns they rode along, with ids
father, and Bosa was, for a few mo
ments, practically alone with her
mysterious protector.
“I fear that you may become fatigu
ed, Miss Murray,” said Lanraan, “we !
shall have to ride fast and far.”
“I can bear it,” answered the bravo !
girl, with a proud flash in her blue
eyes. mu now aons your sermon ,
feel, this nfortdng?”
“Oli, no, it was nothing. ’
“But you will let me thank you, will
you not, for having received it on our
! account !” ,
“No, Indeed 1“ said Bauman, with his
usual bitter coolness. “Anything lint
that! A man who has nothing to live
1 for had better die for something or
| somebody, the first good chance lie
; gets.”
“Nothing to live for, Mr. Bauman?
Ilow ran that hr r"
“You may learn some day, but l
hope it will he after I have ceased to
live at all.”
“You are a mystery, Mr. Bauman!''
: said Rosa.
“I wish 1 was as much so to others as
I ant to inyeotl'," was the bitter reply. !
and the speaker's handsome face work
' ed with pain in spite of Isis habitual
self-control.
He tnrnejJ the conversation as quick
ly as lie could, but as they rode along
side by side the eyes of the beautiful,
l but inexperienced girl rested more and
more frequently on Mie countenance ,
whose dorp lines, spite of its youth,
scented to her evidently those of sor
row rather than of crime of vice.
For along lime Bauman relapsed in
| to a moody silence, until aroused by ,
! an emphatic "till!” from Japan Joe, ,
! who rede near them. ,
“Mr. Murray," said the young man,
“our intended place of refuge is near
at hand, and our horses are pretty well ,
blown."
“Wo have onadc good time,” said (
Mr^ Murray,‘‘and I’m not sorry fora ,
i chance to rest.” ; j
Half a tni\p further and they came to ,
i the broad bed, in the centre of which ,
! rippled the narrow “summer water” of (
one of the smaller branches of the ,
i Brazos. I
Carefully watching for quicksands j
in the treacherous ooze, the Bipan led ,
the way into the stream and down it
for some little distance. Then, with- j
out waiting for consultation, he wheel- ,
ed liis horse and led the little cavalcade |
directely up the bed as carefully as be
fore, until the horses’ feet rested on a
firm, gravelly bottom. ,
“Where are you taking us, Bauman ?” (
asked Harry.
“Wait and see. Lipan knows what ,
he is about.”
What are railed canons in Western (
parlance are not common in that part t
ot' the country, nor oi great extent, but ,
this little “branch,’ a torrent at some ,
seasons, had made one of itself in cut- .
ting its way through a ridge of no great ,
elevation, and toward this the Indian ,
was conducting them. It was indeed ,
a fair hiding-place for even a more
numerous party. 1 (
The rock, a sort of conglomerate, ,
underlain uy coarse limestone, nau i
.been worn away, leaving a rugged ,
Cfcsnnel, with high and precipitous .
side^Uls, while the entrance itself was
j siugiilat-'^alirupt and narrow. ,
“The two pi«1n*taou," White and ,
red, hail dearly been h. ro before, for ! ,
they entered without hesH(itiou, came 1
to a halt on a little sandy plateau not j
far from the entrance, concealed by ]
masses of fallen rock, and announced ,
| that the hour for rest and refreshment ,
! had come. ,
Nobody was specially sorry for'this.
and It os a, in particular, felt the fatigue ,
of her night ride severely. ,
No lire could be allowed, but a fair
picnic dinner was made iu spite of all i i
that- ,
——— : (
On AFTER VI. i.
The calculation of Lipan Joe anil
Lauman had been that, if they were
pursued, their enemies would be npt
to cross the stream near the point at
; wliirli thidr Irnil entered It. And when
the proposed strategic movement
would be reasonably safe. If, how
ever, an attempt should be made to
follow them into canon, the position
was one which a few determined men
could hold against many times their
number.
With his sombre face, even gloomier
titan usual, Lanman stood near the en
trance of the gorge, scanning the roll
ing plain below him with a fleidglass,
which Harry Murray had found, on
trial, to be one of unusual excellence.
‘•They are coming, Harry," shid he,
laconically, as he lowered his glass,
“hot everything be put in readiness for
a tight or a retreat.'*
“AAho arc coming?" asked Mr. Mur
ray.
“The Comanches, tin's time, and not
a very large band. They have halted
at the crossing to examine our trail.”
The horses, saddled and packed,
were moved somewhat further up
while the men of the party stood
silently watching for the result of the
search which their enemies were mak
ing.
The tactics of Lipan .Toe had eviden
tly puzzled them. They could easily
trace tlie trail into the water, and for
some distance afterward; but where
had it come out ? They scoured the
banks on both sides, up and down,
gesticulating savagely, and evidently
not at all pleased by the loud and em
barrassing delay.
After an hour or so wasted in this
fruitless exploration, the Comanches
seemed to have made up their minds,
sngaeiouosly, to something near the
I I II t II, ii II U till- VY IIUJC tmnu (.111 11111 11 lull
faces up-stream, though not riding
very fast.
Already they were within an eighth
'fa mile of the ravine, when a single
warrior earns lip behind them, urging
tiis jaded mustang to (lie utmost, and
vociferating some piece of news that
Drought the whole band to a lmlt.
J.anman could make a pretty shrewd
ruesg as to the probable cause oftliis
Yesh excitement; nor did he err much,
for, as ho surmised, the roughs were
sotuing.
Mounted on fresher, if not better
horses than the somewhat weary mus
tangs of the Comanche*, the white cvit
hroats would have caught up with |
hem sooner or lately in any event, and
he delay at the ‘•branch” had hurried >
hr- catnMroplia.
In their blind rage and fear, they had
tressed on upon the trail of the shod
lorses of Mr. Murray and his friends,!
aking little note how frequently ii
yas crossed by the unshod tracks of
he mu-tanges.
Xot that they would have minded
hat much, in any event, as they would
nive considered themselves a match
oranv ordinary “horse-stealing party"
if any tribe.
They had made a blunder, however,
is they found to their cost. - he
.him no lies well knew that a tight, must |
ionic, and prepared to meet it like
eteran warriors.
Keeping full half their force out of
ight in the neighboring hollows and
tehind the thickets of willow and young j
ottouwood, they displayed just enough
if their warriors to tempt their foes
uto an immediate charge, and thus
vailed for vengeance. They were
nore than double the number ofthe
lesperadoes, but even then the light
ras likely to be a fair one. Had their
lorses boon in better condition, the
ndians would doubtless have shunned
ueh a profitless trial of strength.
The fugitives in the ravine, without
hemselves being seen, watched the
xciting affair below them with breath
ess interest.
“Whichever party wins,” said Harry
iturray, “it will he a good thing for
is, ns the victors will hardly be in con
iition for another tight right away.”
“Much kill, ’said I.ipan Joe. “Hope
II git kill. Den we safe.”
This charitable wish was hardly
ittered before the foremost riders of
he men from the camp came in view,
ml in little more time than it takes to
ell it, the whole gang were made
ware of the prospect before them, and
irepared to rush in for what seemed
he easy defeat or destruction of the
quad ot redskins before them.
True to their national tallies, the
'omauches did not wait to stand a
barge of white riflemen on masse, but
iroke in all directions, compelling
heir shouting and exulting pursuers to
catter after them.
The result of this running manoeuvre
vas. ttint as squad after squad of fresh
rumors started from their ambuscade, \
lie startled miscreants found them-1
elves compelled to stand, singly or in
mull parties, each against superior i
lumbers.
Hail they kept together they could I
lave made a different kind of work, I
nit as it was, man after man went
town, though making a desperate re
istauce, that told fearfully ou their
lusky destroyers.
The surprise had been very nearly
omplete, and the struggle was a brief,
ine; but, to the oonsteriiatiou of the
pec tutors in the ravine, several of the
icst lndiau-tighters amongthein suceee-,
leil in getting together, ami keeping a ;
iteadv front against all attacks, worked
,heir way through the melee toward
he entrance, well knowing that if they
■ould once reach rocky ground the
mperiority of their weapons would be
otne a vastly increased advantage.
The Indians saw their purpose, and
drove hard to defeat it, hut the dis
tnnec was short, and it soon became
clear that the effort must succeed.
They were about half a do/.cn in
number, and were soon joined by two
or three others.
“What shall we do now ?" exclaimed
Mr. Murray. “If we lire a shot we
shall betray ourselves to tlie Co
manchee,”
“We must help to destroy that gang
first. We can attend to the Indians
afterward. Ready, now, and don't
miss a shot I Hold! let them kill a few
more redskins first!’
The Comanches themselves were
visibly shrinking from the firm front
and deadly turn of the borderers, and
were beginning lo ride in wider and
wider circles.
Too many warriors had already been
lost, and if the riflemen could have on
ly gained the rocks, not an Indian
would have followed them.
The ruffians were already beginning
to congratulate themselves on their es
cape, when, in obedience to orders
from Laiiman, the two negroes and the
Lipan drew careful “beads" across their
rocky rests, and three of the luckless
conspirators rolled irorn their saddles.
Lanmau had reasons of his own for
wishing other hands to accomplish
such a work as that, though the justice
of it was beyond dispute; hut no such
scruples bothered the minds of his
dusky associate?. ,
Great was the consternation of the
astonished roughs. Death before them
—dentil behind them. It was to much,
and in their desperation they made, as
if witli one accord, a dash forward that
was rather the expression of their fear
and desperation than their courage.
Scarce less was the surprise of the
Conianches, but they were not blind to
the advantage thus given them, and
with wild, revengeful whoops they
joined in the pursuit of the terrified
roughs, forgetting that they still labor
ed imddf a disadvantage in horseflesh.
“Day had!" said TJpati Joe. “Git
obor scare, an' den all dein rascal git
away. No catch him now. Much kill,
dough. Dat good. Now wo go
quick F
“Now's onr time!" said I.amnan ; and
piloted by the.Lipan, the whole party
toiled up the rugged bed of the canon.
it was slow work, but an hour found
them, without accident, fairly out on
tlie.j.i'ntii'ies at the top of the ridgo.
>. - .. '.'I ring thing was voi', iuG,
after a moment spent, in consultation,
the fugitives turned their faces once
more westward, hoping that the battle
at the mouth of the ravine had deliv
ered them from,their pursuers, ns the
Conianches would be sure to go back
to their dead and vvoundcd.-Contiuued
in the Ashes.
Heretofore all citizens of our Great
Republic, have been used to look with
pride upon their respective states, as
proud and independent Common
wealths, exercising in all things the
freest and fullest rights of sovereignty
save as restrained by the constitution;
each equal to all the others, and with
its own inherent powers and dignities.
Such is the theory of our constitutions.
Such (he system under which we chal
lenged the admiration of the world.
Under it our children were free born
and grew up, bowing the knee to no
power but the constitution and the laws
created by themselves.
How humiliating to the pride of
every freeman is now the spectacle!
A body of men, claiming under tho
bayonet, and the farce of an election,
to be the legislature of the State; con
scious of no inherent power derived
from tlie citizens of the state, sit hum
bly passing the time in pretences of
business, waiting when it shall please
their masters in congress to give them
leave to legislate! Suing, fawning,
wheedling a congress composed of cit
izens of other states to give them leave
to rob and oppress their own. This is
not Arkansas! God Forbid! She lies
prostrate,bleeding, powerless, but with
tlie pride of old! most lovely in her
distress—appealing to justice and to
right alone. These are their oppressors.
The strangers who lmvc fastened on
her prostrate form, and with knives
eagerly whetted, awaiting permission
of their masters to cut.— Washington
Telegraph.
Beginning the Would.—Many an
unwise parent labors hard and lives
sparingly'for lile, for the purpose of
laamnc onnii.vli In irSi’A n ct-l I'l 111 t 111’.
world, as it is called. Setting a young
man afloat with money left him by his
relatives, is like tying bladders under
the arms of one that cannot swim ; ten
chance* to one ho will lose his bladders
and go to the bottom, 'l'cach him to
swim and he will never need the blad
ders. Give your child a sound educa
tion, and you have done enough for
him. See to it that liis morals are pure
and his mind cultivated, and his whole
nature made subservient to the laws
Which govern men, and you have given
him what will bo of more value than
the wealth of the Indies. To bo
thrown upon one's resources Is to bo
e-ust. into the very lap of fortune, for
our faculties then undergo a develop
ment, and display an energy of which
they are previously imperceptible.—
Dr. Arnold.
--
I*#» A man had a sign up—-‘Cheap
ladies’ shoes for sale here.” lie found
that not a lady entered his shop. No
wonder; the ladies don’t like to be
called cheap, they want to be called
dear
✓
An Kkmij on Harrlat».
-“2 soles with but s single thort,
2 hearts as beats like 1,”
Marriage is that conglomeration of
the sexes as is considered constitution
al in all countries; but it is more par
ticularly one of the United States.
! When a man so fnr furgits himself as
(o git married, he bids farewell to the
1 Declaration of Independence, and be
comes at once a member of the garter,
an order established by tlie crusaders
in the “times that tried men's soles.”
; Marriage grammatically speakin' is a
compound conjunction, and shows the
relation between man and woman. Ac
! cordin’ to arithmetic, l don’t see how
people make out that marriage makes
; two folks one, for if von take the cy
j pher (0) woman,and add to the unit (1)
I man, it makes 10, unless flgurs lie ; and
figures won’t lie in anything else unless
it is marriage. Different folks have
j different reasons for marryiu—some
marry for love and sonic for riches,
and some because they want to and
some because they can’t help it. When
j a man falls in love he takes to rcadin’
, yaller kiverod novels, and wearin’ lav
j ender colored kids and patcut leather
boots as pintches his toes, and puttin’
l “new mown hay” onto his pocket hand
| kerchief. Then he furgits to put sugar
; in his coffee, and makes mistakes in
Ins accounts.—Then lie ta£ps to drink
I ing Mr. Winslow's soothing syrup, and
putting squills on his hair, and parting
i the same in the middle on tne top ot
i his head. As the time approaches for
him to he hitched to the adored of his
buzzem, lie feels like an eel was crawl
ing down his back, and little cupids
| with wings and without any cloths on
was singing the Star Spangled Ban
ner in the air all around.—Then like
the prodigal son, he goes from bad to
wus, until he gits his name in the pa
i per under the proper headin’, and tells
i tlie world that he is united in padlock,
and “no cards’’ played, and sends some
1 gingerbread and pop hear to the editor
who wishes the happy pare a long
‘life and many of’em. Then comes the
hunnymuno and the bridal trip to
Niagara, or Mammoth Cage or the
Bridge of size.—After this the hunny
mune is all muneshine, until a still small
voice announces that there’s an “angel
in the house,’’ as the poit says; hut it
I seemed more like the dickens was in
the house when l heard 'em. After
' awhile there's a family Jar, which jars
ain't lit to preserve friendship. They
are “of the earth earthly."
When Araminta and 1 got married,
after a coartship of some seventeen
winters, during which she never “told
her love, but like a worm in the mud,
fed onto her damaged cheek," we had
| lots of presents of tinware, short cloths
spoons and other wearing apparel;
but rather more spoons than anything
else. It was a very spooney time.—
(Butler hadn't been round at that peri
od.) But tiic short cliothcs still lie in
bureau drawers a monument and mock
ery to boyish dreams and disappointed
ambition. As the Scorched poit, Burns
I says:
“T!iebe«t laid schemes of mic’ and men,
i Oft gang nglee,”
• Blit Araminta and I arc drawiu' down
| the vale of life together, still lovin
' still hoping that the time will soon
; come when we shall have to provide a
1 extra spoon and porringer. Trooly
hope is a sheet anker to the soul.—
j Long may she wave 1»
But marriage is a divine instit ution,
moro so than a republican form of gov
ernment. Adeia couldn't live without
Mrs. Adem, suaix or no snaix.
i And beeos they raised Cain
after they were married, it's no sine
that other folks rais cain in their mar
ried stait. Beeos they et up their best
winter apples it’s no sine married peo
ple should have each other’s hair come
I out before the usual time! Marriage
is mootual, and one can't git along
without a child ou the end ou’t. Wo
! man to man is like a bob to a kite; the
more she is attached to man the higher
lie can lli. Marry early and many often ;
and when you git a good woman, stick
to her a shoemaker's wax to a hot stove
! or a Spaldia’s glu to a broken china.
' Sich is the law and the profits.
Piecefully yourn,
A. HEAD.
The Barefooted Printer.—Some
i thirty years r.gd, a barefooted boy
floated down the Susquehanna on an
humble raft and arrived at Harrisburg.
' lie came from the North and belonged
! to a large family ; ail his worldly goods
were tried up in a little handkerchief
lie sought and obtained employment
i in a printing office as an apprentice.—
From uii apprentice to a journeyman,
| from a journeyman to a reporter, from
a reporter to an editor, the printer boy
worked his way against obstacles
which the suffering poor only know.
The young aspirant became printer to
the State, and by frugal management
was soon enabled to accomplish the
object nearest bis heart—the establish
ment of his mother in a home above
want His brothers were his next care,
and in a few-years they, too, w ith their
sisters, were independent in the world ;
the once barefooted printer boy was in
possession of affluence, surrounded by
a young and affectionate family. Ho
arose in honor and offlee, until the
barefooted printer l>oy was elected a
United States Senator. This man is
Simeon Cameron, the late Secretary of
War.
tey*-‘l love thee still,” said a quiet
husband to his chatty w ife.
$4LM((a.\»I.
„,TTlMrB- PartinK,oU *ay« file mav be ,
! was Z'youl *hc 1,!,s T' "‘P’ dtty‘
"as ever she was.
jSy.A certain _.
glad she is not “a tlm.' s1''
she would not like to be ’l lnl'> lor
| ever.” • T°-v for
IGf A little girl just past her tlfi,. *
year while chattering about the beaux
that visited two of the sex in the same
house, of more mature age, being ask
ed, “What do you mean by beaux, An
nie ?” Replied, “I mean men that have
not got much sense."
Way John Phoenix once said that
when, fl'bhl the deck of an outgoing
i steamer, he shouted to a friend, “Good
by, Colonel," two-thirds of the crowd
on the wharf raised their hats, and
said, “Good by, old fel. Tekkar ycr
self.”
IGf The position of the Republican
party With reference to the impeach
ment of Mr. Johnson is well illustra
ted by a “little story.”
‘What do you think of impeachment ?’
said a gentleman to a Radical, a night
or two ago.
‘Well, I'll tell you; it’s like a boy
who was digging after a woodchuck
like blazes. A man who was passing
iiio uired:
‘What are you doing, boy ?’
‘Digging for a woodchuck.’
‘You don’t expect to get him, do
] you ?’
‘Yes, siree, by G—d! I must have
j him ; we’re out of meat!’
And this is precisely what’s the mat
■ ter with the Radical gentlemen who
| arc digging after Mr. Woodchuck
1 Johnson.
“A Gal Baby at That.’’—To desire
a change (if sex is not commonly con
sidered a manly aspiration; to weep
about it seems ludicrous. Yet the
i tiling has been done, and on the tented
I field. In the very fiercest of the bat
' tie at Malvern Hill. General Lee en
j countered a tall Johnny Keb in full re
treat, and blubbering fearfully. Ho
1 stopped him and shamed him ; but the
i fellow openly avowed cowardice, and
: said lie knew he was a coward when
they scripted him.
! ‘Well,’ said the patient, hut vexed,
General, ‘that may he, but you need
j not bellow about it like a great baby.’
j ‘Babyf echoed the conscript, ‘i wish
T was a baby, and a gal baby at that!’
As a warrior, the General regarded
| the party defective, and paused not for
farther colloquy.
Jtaf" A young gentleman by the name
1 of Conkey, having united in the holy
i bonds of wedlock, sent the marriage
I notice, with a couplet of his (own com
position, to a local paper, for publica
tion, as follows:
Married, on August 1st, A. Conkey,
Esq,, Attorney at Law, to Miss Enphe
mia Wigging.
Love i.s tbe union of two hearts that beat in
softest melody:
Time, with its ravages, imparts no better fu
sion to its ecsracy.
Mr. Conkey looked with much anx
iety for the issue of the paper, that he
might see his name in print. The typo
! into uhosc charge the notice was
placed happened to be on a spree at the
time, and made some wonderful blun
ders in setting it up, thus :
Married, on August 1st, A. Donkey,
Esq., Eternally at Law, to Miss Euphu
nia Digging.
Jove is a onion wilh two heads that belt in
softest rnelouy;
Time, with its ravages, imparts no better
food to an estia dray.
The minister who boasted bf
preaching without notes, didn't mean
; to be understood to refer to green
backs.
j®“ “Hello, Bill, lend me five dol
lars?’ “You’re mistaken in the man,
sir, I’m not a five dollar Bill.’
“Well, uncle, do you see any
particular difference in neighbor l’earco
since he joined the church ?'
“Oh, yes,’ was the reply: “a great
difference. Before, when he went out
into his garden on Sunday, he carried
his gardening tools on his shoulder;
now ho carries them under his over
coat.’’
IH&t The Bangor Whig mentions that
there is an absent-minded gentleman in
that city, who met his own son in tlio
street the other day, shook hands with
him inquired after his health and when
l • it.it.-.-_i-.l -i 1,_
fair A Chicago editor remarks that
he is glad to rcceivo marriage notices,
but request that they be sent soon al
ter the cererony and before the divorce
is applied for. Ho has had several no
spoiled In this way.
ltg*Fowl culture is receiving atten
tion in Paris. “I've got a henery,’’late
ly said a great lady to her cousin.
“Dear me,” said the cousin, “I thought
his name was Charles!”
jS-jg-A correspondent of the Carlin
ville Democrat fiirniqhea the following:
The other day one of the Internal
Revenue officers was around. II. was
giving the amaunt of goods sold, etc.,
when the officer asked him, among oth
questions, whose duty it is, the follow
ing ? “Did your wife have an income
last year ?” “Yes,” replied II., “she had
twins—both girls.” The officer at once
concluded that it was a liberal income.
•9*Soine person or persons entered
the presbyterian church, at Peoria, and
stole every yard of the c«mat the church
cout^d. WX