The Alaska Junean-Douglas Island News
Issued by the Alaska Treadwell find Alaska
Juneau Gold Mining Companies ou
the 1st and 16th of each month
L. S. FERRIS ..Editor
This publication is Intended to be a
community letter sent to all former em
ployees of the Alaska Juneau and Tread
well Companies now in service. Our honor
rolls ar not complete—anyone knowing
of any corrections or additions will con
fer a favor by notifying the editor at
once. We will have to look to the friends
of those on the honor roll (who we will
be glad to put on our mailing list) for
news and correct addresses.
BLUNDERS
Hello Fellers:
Our hats i3 sure off to you • * • • The
big game over there is busted and all of
us lookouts here in Alaska feel some proud
of the case-keepers what went over to
bust that Hun bank • • ♦ « Every guy in
the game had a stack of reds, whites and
blues. They was played four ways from
the deuce and Heine had to pay every
bet for they wasn’t no splits • * * • *
When the case turn comes, the Kaiser's
in a hell of a fix, for he’s wise to just two
more cards in the box—“victory” and "de
fet” * * * * He sees every guy tappin’
himself to win on the high card—"vic
tory,” and all the coppers on the table is
played on “defeat” to lose ♦ * • • That
Kaiser guy has been some wise dealer in
his time so he sizes up the layout and
’fore makin’ the last turn, he sees some
more hell • * * * Back of all the Ameri
can taus tappin emseives over mere, ne
gets a pipe at our Uncle Sam reachin’ in
the poke for a few billions to stake you
fellers to—and at the same time he gets
a flash of two or three million men more
over here preparin’ to git into the game
• * * * Does he make the last turn? Dam
right he don’t. He’s wise that the turn
is called, and —bluey, the game’s busted
* * * * Sorry I ain’t had no chance to say
hello to you fellers long ’fore this, for I
sees youse handin’ it to Steve Ferris,
Bradley and all the rest of the Treadwell
tops for gittin’ out this tittle rag, and it
wises me up that a word from any of the
old gang and what’s going on around the
Channel listens mighty good to you * * • *
It’s been some spell since you pulled out
for the land of the grape and chickens—
and, listen, our hats Is off again to the
way them frog-eaters and lime-juicers
has been treatin’ yu' • • • * Yuvo all
pulled like malamutes ten minutes 'afore
salmon time—and yu' sure got the bacon
• * • • • We’ve missed yu’ since yu' left
and yu’ know the l»tch string’s always
out when yu’ git back * • * • There'll be
some glad mitts for you iads when you
mush north again and the fatted “porky”
’ll be done to a turn in your honor * * • •
Many of the old gang has left durin’ the
past year and bought chips in other
games—anywhere to give Uncle Sam
a hand, but now that yuve got the Kai
ser’s bank roll many of 'em is writln’ that
they gotta git back north—and some of
em is Deginmn iu cuuie aueauj -
Durin’ the past month, everyone's been
muzzled on ’count of the "flu” an’ no
one’s hollered ’ceptin’ Gabe Paul. That
guy never needed no bug catcher with the
soup strainer he keeps in trainin' around
his nose, but Doc Sargeant, Bradley and
Mayor Smith overlooks that bet. Them's
the health lookouts for the Island, but
they never figgered that no self-respectin’
flu bug ’ud play it for sure suicide to go
nsar that bunch of spinach Gabe culti
vates, so the coffee-strainer ain’t been
seen for a month. ’Tain’t healthy to buy
prunes from Gabe these days for he ain’t
got no chance to raise the lid of the
strainer while the mask’s on his mush,
and hand you some of that special cured
bull of his’n • * • * The quarantine will
soon b e off now though, and maybe
Gabe’s gettin’ better humored. But Suth
erland’s wise to him—Sutherland is the
main equeeze in the Treadwell store now
since Pinger quit the game, you know.
When the bug catcher is throwed away,
Gabe won’t be allowed to open any new
lines of coffee or canned soup, and so.
bein’ out of practice, everyone is hopin'
that Oscar, the barber, ’ll git an order
from Gabe that’ll go down in history * *
* * * Since Ed Harris got spliced and Ben
Lemlng went to Chichagof and most of
the old gang out of the game, they ain’t
much chance for a poor blunder man,
but I’m goin' to nose around again durin'
the next coup'.e of weeks and hear what
some of the old bunch has got to say for
'emselves * * « • Steve Ferris is the sanc
tum sanctorium guy now, you know, and
I gotta keep cases on how strong he is
with the blue pencil. If he don’t tie a
can to me after this issue, chances is
you’ll git another effusion in the next
from the BLUNDER MAN.
Again Alaska leads. In the Fourth Lib
erty Loan, Alaska exceeded all other terri
tories and states in percentage, having
1B6 per cent oversubscribed.