HYDER WEEKLY HERALD
Established 1924
Published Every Saturday at the Herald Building,
Second Avenue, Hyder, Alaska.
Chas. F. Sandford and Louise Sandford
Sole owners and publishers
Chas. F. Sandford,.Editor and Manager
Application made for entry at the post office at Hyder, Al
aska, as second Jass matter, un^r the Act of March 8,
1879.
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Unlfess otherwise agreed, all transient advertising is pay
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Changes in Display Advertising for current weekly issue
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AN INDEPENDENT NEWSPAPER
GIVE YOURL TOWN
A REPUTATION.
Work for and with your home
town. Improve it. Make it at
tractive. Help make it the kind
of a town that you really want
to live in.
The best advertisement of
your business is the town you
live in, if its the kind of a town
it should be.
Towns get reputations as well
as men. Make your town’s rep
utation one that will attract
favorable attention.
First of all make it a clean
town, by ridding it of eyesores.
Make a cluttered up yard a
disgrace and an unpainted
house a reproach.
Next make public opinion too
hot for those who knock, who
refuse to cooperate for the
general good, and who will not
help.
Our town should be one
where folks are friendly,
where progressiveness is ap
preciated, where attractiveness
is considered an asset, where
living conditions are good,
where the helping hand is ex
tended to the unfortunate,
where intolerance is unknown,
and good spirits and good fel
lowship prevail.
That’s the kind of a home
town we want!
V
OVERLOOKING THE
DEADLIER ENEMY.
Traffic accidents kill a few
thousands of men, women and
children annually, causing the
setting up of extensive safe
guards for the protection of
human life.
A citizen is killed by assassins
in a foreign land, and diplo
matic relations between two
nations are strained and the
indignation of millions is
aroused to the point of violent
outbreak.
An epidemic of infantile pa
ralysis breaks out with the re
sultant loss of life of several
hundred children, and the
! nation organizes every re- !
I source to combat the disease.
I But germ-carrying insects,
which yearly cause the death
of millions of human lives and
destroy vast quantities of |
man’s food supplies, attract j
the concern of one or two gov- ■
ernmental departments, pro-!
! voke an occasional "swat the
: ^y” or “clean-up" campaign
| and disturb not the public’s
1 peace of mind.
i The mosquito and the fly are
j the most destructive enemies !
! of man. They convey to man
malaria, sleeping sickness,
' cholera, typhoid and other'
deadly diseases. Other insects
destroy wheat and cotton i
crops, murder man’s livestock i
or contaminate food supplies.
And the only defense the pub-!
lie makes against these most j
powerful and destructive of i
its enemies is to screen in the '
house and spray fields and!
orchards.
A.
THIS PROPAGANDA
WILL FAIL.
From London, masculine style
center of the world, comes the
alarming news that whiskers
and mustaches are returning in
vogue. The beard, say London
barbers, stands out more than;
ever as the true badge of mas
culinity, and the vogue of
the clean shaven male is on the
decline.
The prediction has all the!
earmarks of propaganda, for
emancipated masculinity will
i hardly go back of its own ac
; cord to the old days pictured
I in the advertising of a con
temporary shaving soap manu
facturer. Whiskers are a both
er, unsanitary, abhorrent to
the ladies and uncomfortable,
and even should the Prince of
Wales himself hide his pre*
sentable features behind a
hirsute fringe, the rest of man
kind would be loath to follow.
Aside from the unsanitary as
pects, however, the average
man, despite his grumbling,
looks forward to the morning
shave. There is something ritu
alistic about the process, some
thing pleasing to the eye in a
keen-edged razor and the
white lather or cream. Shaving
constitutes an escape from the
commonplace and an oppor
tunity to persist in the hope
less task of trying to itnprove
the face that nature made. A
shave is always. soothing and
refreshing, but only those
whose customary de-feathering
has been postponed forty
eight hours or longer fully
appreciate the benevolence of
a good shave. The annoyance
of shaving is a small price to
pay (for the pleasant sensat
ions that follow.
Barbers forced the women to
cut their tresses, and in doing
so succeeded largely in driving
man from one of his last
strongholds-the barber shop.
That is sufficient interference
with male prerogatives. A cam
paign to bring about the re
turn of whiskers is doomed to
disappointment.
Just for Fun
With some people religion is
merely a kind of rabbit’s foot
to keep away bad luck.
One time you certainly pay as
you go is wheji you ride on a
train.
An auto is a necessity unless
you want to get run over by
one.
A fetching costume is any
costume that will fetch a man.
Sometimes a pessimist is the
son of an optimist.
The burning question soon will
be the sun instead of coal
prices.
The folding card table would
be a great invention if it prac
ticed moderation.
Two gentlemen riding on a
train were both very much in
toxicated.
First Gent: “What time is it?’’
Second Gent (after extracting
a match box from his pocket
with much exertion and gazing
at it intently) : “Thursday.”
First Gent: “My heavens, I’ve
got to get off here.”
A Hyder man, says that mar
ried men do not lie from
choice, but that their wives
persist in asking such fool
questions.
Deal with the manager when 1
possible. Underlings may be as j
unreasonable as you are.
About the only things that get
whipped these days are eggs
and cream. It was different
when we were kids.
. A good way to kill a project
is to put it in the hands of a
large committee.
People didn’t leave home so
much in the old days. There
were fewer bill collectors to
dodge.
Max Behrmann says one can
not afford to borrow trouble at
the present exhorbitant inter
est rate.
Mabel—“How do you like my
new lipstick?”
Jack—“Its all that its
smacked up to be.”
Even a pair of patched trous
ers is better than none at all,
according to Jimmie Roberts.
A “blind” beggar sat with a j
tin cup in his hand. A passer- j
by, slightly under the influence
of alcohol, took out his pocket
flask and started to pour a
drink into the man’s cup.
The beggar opened his eyes
suddenly, saw the flask and
yelled: “Nix! nix! None of
that stuff! Do you think I
wanta go blind?”
Two men went hunting for
the first time and borrowed a
few dogs from a farmer. After
they had been out for a while
they returned.
“What’s the matter?” asked
the farmer. “Do you want more
shot?”
“No,” they replied, “we want
more dogs.”
She (after the game): I think
I they were horrible not to cheer
I the fellow with the white
pants; he carried the ball more
i than anyone else.
Take Life In a Slow Trot.
Patience lad,
Hold your mules,
Those who rush
Are branded fools.
Jones: “Hey, Wilkins, I have
a bone to pick with you!“
Wilkins: “Nothing doing,
Jones, I’m a vegetarian."
BALLADS OF A HUSBAND.
A leaf just landed on my head;
To walk I’m hardly able;
The leaf that landed on my
head,
Was taken from a table.
A husband and wife were
talking about the various cem
eteries and church yards with
in a certain radius of where
they lived, and after a time,
the husband asked: “And
where would you like to be
r— -N
Chamber
of
Commerce
-o
Hyder, Alaska
-o-—
Reliable Information
Relative To
PORTLAND CANAL
MINING DISTRICT
buried when the time comes?”
“On top of you, dear,” was
the quick response, and the
subject was dropped.”
Teacher: “Give me a sentence
using the words detail, defeat,
deduct, and defense.”
Pupil: “Defeat of deduct
went-over defense ahead of
detail.”
A hardware store clerk re
New Yorkers never stand to
watch the train come in; they
stand to watch somebody
work.
Flattery isn’t at all essential
unless you are trying to marry
a rich old widower.
“Are you going to take your
maid with you to the beach
this summer?”
“No, indeed. Last year the
one I took became engaged to
the only desirable man in the
place before my daughter had
WATCHES! WATCHES!
Waltham 17 and 23 Jewels
Hamilton 19 and 21 Jewels
Elgin 7 and 15 Jewels
| Standard 7 and 15 Jewels
Ingeraolls
Wrist watches, Waltham, El
gin A Hofes, $12.50 to $25.00
Jewelry made to order, repair
work Anything in jewelry fur
nished on short notice.
THE NUGGET SHOP
PORTLAND CANAL LODGE
1218
LOYAL ORDER OF MOOSE
, Meets Second and Fourth
Thursdays
Secqnd Thursday in Hyder
Fourth Thursday in Stewart
GE0R6E B. GRIGSBY
Attorney - at - Law
KETCHIKAN. ALASKA
even discovered that he was
there.”
ported that he waited on a
lady customer who wanted
three pounds of nails.
“What kind,” asked the clerk.
“8-penny, 10-penny, 12-penny
or what?”
“My husband didn’t say,” re
plied 'the fair customer, “but
he always gets the best so
you’d better give me the 12
penny kind.”
Bluff runs in where brains
fear to tread.
Just “Do Your Stuff”—don’t
run ? Muff,
Or let ol’ hardship “stall” y< i.
Or play your hand with too
much “sand,”
Or life will surely “call” you!
Just forge ahead ,and don’t go
dead,
Or be too “wise” and “know
ing,”
And put your HEART in what
you start,
And gamely keep on GOING!
PROFESSIONAL
^ttontcg at ^ato
JTghcr, ^.lasfea
FRANK A. METCALF
CIVIL ft MINING ENGINEER
U. Sl MINERAL SURVEYOR
JUNEAU ALASKA
Dr. C. D. Carter will be at his
office in the Reichenbach Bldg.
Wednesday, Thursday, and
Friday of each week. For ap<
pointment* at other times
phone Northern Drug Co.,
Stewart.
CHAS. F. WNDFORD
NOTARY PUBLIC
HERALD OFFICE
NOYES BOAT COMPANY
Operating M. V. Fairbanks, Carrying U. S. Mails
FREIGHT and PASSENGER SERVICE BETWEEN
HYDER and KETCHIKAN
Leaving Ketchikan 9 A. M. Tuesday
Leaving Hyder 2 P. M. Wednesday
Hyder Dock Company, Hyder Agents
A. J. MAYER P O BOX 120
...HYDE MACHINE SHOP...
HYPER GARAGE
Plumbing Steamfitting Black-smithing General Repairs
Authorized Ford Agent
Genuine Ford Parts
AGENTS FOR FAIRBANKS, MORSE
ENGINES A MACHINERY
HYDER ALASKA
WE MAINTAIN A COMPLETE PLANT IN HYDER
FOR THE MANUFACTURE OF
RUBBER STAMPS
ALSO A LINE OF DATERS, STAMP PADS, INKS
AND ACCESSORIES.
Work Guaranteed Satisfactory or No Charge.
THE HYDER HERALD STAMP WORKS