Howe About:
War and Debt
Temperance Plea
Farming Situation
©. Ball Syndicate.—WNU Sertlce.
By ED HOWE
THE people never had any sense;
l haven't much hope for the fu
ture, either as to myself or others.
Once they kept a war going ou
thirty years. . . . You may say we
have more sense than that now.
1 am not so sure of it. The last
war was conducted on so magnifi
cent a scale that the world became
bankrupt In four years, and we had
to quit; whereas it Is related Fred
erick the Great paid for his wars as
he went along. When he quit, he
didn't owe u penny, and had no pen
sioners to move ou his capital, and
threaten to take it. Boys coming
on Boon supplied Frederick with
more farmers; food was produced
again in a year. . . . But a war
debt constantly increasing and draw
ing Interest, will ruin anybody.
• * *
1 have noted that many people
who annoy me occasionally turn out
to have a good deal of sense. One
man sent me pamphlets daily for
weeks, but finally the pamphlets
were made Into a book called "To
ward Liquor Control.” I have read
the book. Lt w as written by a uum
ber of rather notuble men employed
by the Rockefeller foundation to
look thoroughly into the problem of
liquor control, nud make a report
about it.
The book is one of the best writ
ten, most sensible, and Important 1
have ever read. It Includes a re
view of our general American shift
lessness In public affairs, and which
has finally almost bankrupted us
morally as well as financially. 1
recommend the hook to everyone
who believes a little in common
sense and decency, and In preserv
ing the little civilization we have
managed to achieve.
The book Is n plea for temperance
not only as to Intoxicating liquors,
but in everything else. We are very
Intemperate In our eating, In sex
matters; In all phases of public af
fairs. In education, religion we
must become ashamed of our Intem
perance, or we shall be humiliated
before the world more than we have
been lately.
Not less than 88 per cent of our
Industrial workers are hampered by
Improper diet; of all money spent
by their families on food, 78 per
cent Is misspent, either on Impro
per or too costly or otherwise un
economic dietaries. This disgrace
ful percentage holds In everything
else we do.
Americans became so rich we
reached the Coal Oil Johnny stage
In extravagance and shiftlessness,
and we must do better, as Coal Oil
Johnny died In the poorhouse.
Although he said a poorhouse
diet would kill him, after living so
long on terrapin Rnd turkey, It actu
ally resulted In better health; actu
ally assisted In restoring him to
sanity and Industry.
When 1 was a boy and my fa
ther farmed and preached the old
gospel, we occasionally had a hor
ror. Once n fnruier drove Into Pole
creek after a rain, and was
drowned. His horses drowned with
him.
It was terrible, but we didn't have
excitement often. Once a man had
nose-bleed for days, and constantly
grew weaker, as nothing could be
done to stop It. We all went over
to look at him; everyone was ex
cited. Once a man was bitten on
the thumb by a rattlesnake. He
had cut down a hickory tree, to get
the nuts, and the accident happened
while he was picking them up. The
man put his thumb In his mouth,
and sucked the poison out! We
talked about that for days. An
other time a farmer came home
from town drunk, and everybody
ran over to his house to suggest a
remedy. One woman suggested that
he drink a pan of milk. She had
lived In a town In Indiana, where
we all came from, and know about
such things; and the man got well.
The Civil war was going on then,
and an occasional soldier came home
on furlough with tall tales to tell,
but we had no such terrors as I
hear of every morning and evening
now, when I get the papers. Some
where the other day the members
of a family were eating supper,
when an airplane fell on their
house. The house and seven per
sons were burned up, with the
neighbors looking on ; all they could
do was to save the house next door.
We were poor people, but always
had plenty. Now farmers say they
are starving. Millions of them actu
ally have starved In Russia, because
town men take what the farmers
raise. In my boyhood we hardly
ever saw a town man; especially
they didn’t come out carrying guns,
and tell us what part of our corn
we could keep, and what part they
wanted to support the government’s
N. A. II. I)., which means a new and
better deal.
• • •
Nothing In a man’s life Is more
Important than acknowledging faults,
and trying to remedy them some
what, for faults are always as an
noying as a wart on a busy finger.
... At least, rub the wart with
bacon rind, and bury It under the
eaves of the house; make some ef
fort to get rid of It.
Digging Up Skeletons in Georgia
CIVIL WOHKS AlLMIMSTKATlON crews are being employed In exca
vating the Indian mounds so frequent In Georgia and have unenrthpd
many skeletons of aboriginal Inhabitants and other relics perhaps a thou
sand years old. The work Is supervised by the Smithsonian Institution.
PETER GOES HOME WITH
A SAD HEART
DETER RABBIT held his breath.
* He didn't know that he was hold
ing It, hut he was. Perhaps you
have done that same thing when you
were very much excited. Most every
body does. Would Nlmbleheels suc
ceed in getting away from Booty
the Owl? l’eter couldn't he sure, but
It seemed that Booty had barely
missed the Inst time he struck.
And Peter was sure the Jumps
of Nlmbleheels were growing short
er. The wonderful little jumper
was growing tired. Peter felt sure
^eter Was Sure the Jumps of Nim
bleheels Were Growing Shorter.
of It. How could It be otherwise?
How Peter did wish that he
hadn't asked Nimbleheels to show
him how he could jump.
"it’s all my fnult,” thought Pe
ter. "If Hooty does catch Nimble
heels 1 shall blame myself ns long
as I live. Yes I will, it is all my
fault, it Is all my fault. They are
getting nearer the Brier Patch, but
I'm afraid they won’t get there In
time. Oh dear! Oh dear!”
For the time being Peter quite
forgot that he himself was anything
but safe sitting out there on the
Green Meadows In the moonlight.
His whole thought was for little
Nimbleheels who was so bravely
jumping for his life.
Every once in a while the sharp
snap of Hooty's bill would reach
Peter and send little shivers up and
down his back. lie had heard the
snap of that bill before more than
once, and never without shivering.
Presently a dark cloud passed
over the moon just ns Hooty made
an unusually quick turn and struck
WITTY KITTY
By KINA WILCOX PUTNAM
The Girl-Friend says her hair
dresser may be the one who gives
her a permanent wave, but It’s the
modern authors who give her the
permanent blush.
& Bell Syndicate.—WNU Service.
more fiercely than ever at poor lit
tie Nimbleheels. A Black Shadow
hid them for a minute or two. and
though I’eter strained his eyes he
couldn't see what was happening
When the Black Shadow had passed
on and the Green .Meadows were
once more flooded with moonlight
I’eter stared eagerly at the spot
where he had last seen Nlmbleheeh
and Booty. Neither was to be seen
Hastily l’eter looked this wny nne
that way. Disappearing toward the
Green Forest he saw what looked
like n floating shadow. It wasn't
a shadow. I’eter hail seen It too often
to be fooled even for a minute. It
. was Booty the Owl. I’eter's heart
sank.
"Hooty Is going home to the
Green Forest, so he must have
caught NImbleheels that last time,"
thought Peter sadly. “He caught
little NImbleheels and now he Is
taking him home for dinner. Poor
little NImbleheels. And It was my
fault. It certainly was my fault
If I had not wanted to see him
jump he would have been content
to stay In the dear Old Rrier Patch,
and then this couldn’t have hap
pened.”
Peter turned toward the Rrier
Patch and hurried home, lipperty
lipperty-llp. He felt that the Green
Meadows were not a safe place for
him that night. And ns he crept
under his favorite bramble bush his
heart was heavy with sadness. Life
seemed a terrible thing. Somehow
the moonlight no longer seemed so
beautiful. Peter sighed heavily, for
he was very, very sad. Then he j
sighed again.
“What's the matter with you?
Have you a pain?” asked a thin,
high squeaky voice that sounded
most familiar. Peter Jumped ns
if he had sat on a brier.
©. T. W. Burgess.—WNU Service.
Koners
lie was nrrested and held In cus
lard until his trial.
BONERS are actual humorous
tid-bits found in examination pa
pers, essays, etc., by teachers.
Oliver Goldsmith's masterpiece
was "The Sermon on the Mount."
» • •
Chaucer died In 1400 and Is burled
In Westminster abbey. This Is an
Interesting fact because Chaucer
was the first Englishman buried In
American soil.
• • •
A mummy Is something that is
dead, and dried, and hurled, and
dug up, and looks like leather.
• • •
As Sir Launcelot came out of the
castle gate he saw a leopard there,
that begged him for arms.
• • •
Four building stones found In
Middle Atlantic states are marble
granite, sandstone and grindstone
©. Belt Syndicate—WNtI Servlet.
HOW TO USE LAMB
F AMI! Is a most desirable meat,
L-* but It Is too often served only
ns expensive cuts ns leg of lamb or
crown roast. However there are
many cheaper cuts which are equally
palatable.
Pot Roast of Lamb.
Tnke one neck of lamb. Melt the
fat In an Iron kettle (the dutch
oven Is Ideal for this cooking), ndd
one onion sliced, six small carrots,
one small yellow turnip cut Into
cubes, add after the meat has been
browned on nil sides In the onion
and fat. Add a teaspoonful of salt
and six small potatoes, a few dashes
of pepper and two cupfuls of boiling
water. Cover ami cook until ten
dor. Allow fifteen minutes to a
pound as to time of roasting, lie
move the meat and vegetables to a
hot platter and thicken the stock
with flour. Pour over the meat and
serve with horseradish.
Spiced Roast of Lamb.
Take four pounds of the breast of
lamb, wipe with a damp cloth and
rub well with salt and pepper
mixed with flour. Place in a roast
lng pan with six whole cloves,
twelve allspice, throe tablespoonfuls
of brown sugar, two thirds of a cup
ful of vinegar and one-third cupful
of water. Ilrown In a hot oven for
fifteen minutes, then reduce the
heat, cover the pan and cook until
tender, adding more water If need
ed. Cook two-thirds of n cupful
each of carrots and peas, one cupful
A Little Garden
By ANNE CAMPBELL
SHK had a little garden
Upon tier window silL
She waters It at evening
When all the world Is still;
A narrow box of beauty
That holds the humblest blooms,
Anil yet It feeds a spirit
That lives In little rooms.
There Is no sweeping vista
To bless her elty eyes.
The walls are thick nrounil her.
They shut away the skies.
But souls that crave the woodlands
Must have a bit of green.
And so above her garden.
The neighbors see her lean.
She hns a little garden
As lovely to her sight,
As are the flowering acres
That grow for your delight;
And In the dewy twilight;
When pale stars shine above,
I know God gives her garden *
The blessing of his love!
Copyright.—WNU Service.
of celery cut Into small pieces, one
half an onion sliced and three clip
fills of potatoes In boiling salted
water until tender but not soft.
Drain earpfully. Melt one-half cup
ful of shortening, add the vegetables
and cook ten minutes. Turn out on
n hot platter, sprinkle with salt,
pepper and n tablespoonfnl of
minced parsley. Place the roast on
the vegetables and serve with brown
gravy.
© by Western Newspaper Union.
Testing a Neiv Germ-Killing Scrum
AN ALMOST unknown Italian physician. Dr. L. Andreattl, Is seen
here treating volunteer patients with Ids serum, with which he hopes
to end the destruction wrought by tuberculosis. He believes the serum,
which he keeps secret for the present, niso will cure many other forms
of disease by destroying the germs. The Italian government authorized
his tests.
| Jo You Know—!
/ MW£L
l^hat there is evidence that
playing cards were in use
in Egypt in the time of
Joseph and that they ap
peared among the Hebrews
after their return from the
Babylonian exile. The
Chinese dictionary, “Ching
Tze-Tung” (1678) states
that they were produced in
China for the amusement
of Seun-Ho’s harem in the
year 1120. e McOurt Ncw*>»p« Syndic*!*
VVNU Service
THROUGH A
Womans Eyes
By JEAN NEWTON
YOU TELL US,
PROFESSOR!
uQUlf histories seem to be little
^ more than the elaborately re
corded misbehavior of males.”
It's the men who make the trou
ble In the world; the women con
tribute the pence and order!
That was the pronouncement of
Professor Wheeler of Harvard re
cently before the American Asso
ciation for the Advancement of Sci
ence. Oh, yes, Professor Wheeler
is himself of the masculine genderl
He is just broad minded and mod
est, when in these words he at
tributes the world's troubles entire
ly to men:
"Throughout the ages the aggres
Box Jacket
The longer box jacket strikes a
new note In spring fashions. The
one here Illustrated is In gray with
a bow scarf in a vivid Roman striped
taffeta.
slvenoss, curiosity, unstable Intelli
gence, contentiousness nnd other
nntl-soclal tendencies which the male
had inherited from his ancestors
have kept society In a constant tur
moil.”
But before we succumb entirely
to the professor's blandishments, let
him finish:
"But without him there would be
no progress! If this were n wom
an's world, pence and order would
reign but society would make no
ndvunces! It is the restless, dom
inance impulses of the male that fur
nlsh tlie necessary stimulus to prog
ress. Female societies nre harmo
nlous, but Incapable of further de
velopment. They remain station
ary I”
When a man admits the superior
ity of the “weaker sex” in any way,
one might know there Is a catch to
it somewhere!
“l’eace nnd order hut no progress”
-Indeed! Well, professor, we don't
mind ttint at all. in fact we're quite
willing to stand by your estimate
of the effect of the two sexes on the
world. We're perfectly willing to
accept pence nnd order for our part.
Only we can't quite figure out what
you mean by “progress" and "ad
vancement." How can there he
progress without order? The his
tory of the world and its strife nnd
turmoil nnd man-mnde wars tells the
story. It was in the peaceful Inter
vals that the progress was made.
Very good, professor—you tell
about the Inlluence of women. We’re
perfectly willing to have It your
way!
©. Bell Syndicate -WNU 8ervlce.
QDUQGvP
"One never gets so sunburned,”
says Suntan Sue, "to discourage
one of the habit of patting oneself
on the back."
©, Bell Syndicate.—WNU Service.
Cleveland Is to Have a Lake front Airport
LI EIIE are some of the hundreds
^ of CWA workers who are em
ployed In building a Inkefront air
port for Cleveland, Ohio. It will bt
one of the few In the country sit
uated within a mile of a city's bust
nesa section. The project, sponsored
by City Welfare Director David S
Ingalls, calls for the expenditure of
$250,000.
Good Taste Today
By EMILY POST
Author of
"ETIQUETTE,” “THE BLUE
BOOK OF SOCIAL USAOE,” Etc.
INTRODUCTIONS
DEAR Mrs. Post: llow should my
young son, nged ten, ho Intro
duced to our friends?
Answer: "Mrs. Jones, tills Is my
son Hobby” or "Ethel, this Is
Bobby,” then to Bohhy, “—Miss
Blnke.” Bohhy then says, “How do
you do, Mrs. Jones” (or "Miss
Blake”).
• • •
Dear Mrs. Post: Is there any way
that would he correct to meet the
young girl in the next apartment
house? Her father Is a professional
associate of my father, hut outside
of the hospital at which both are
attending physicians, they never
meet, We are really the newcom
ers In tlie neighborhood so neigh
borhood courtesy cannot lie used ns
a means.
Answer: Tlie strictly proper thing
to do Is to wait until a friend In
common Introduces you. But since
very few people take strict propri
eties of til is sort very seriously, you
might perhaps write her a note, tell
her her fattier knows your father and
that you would like very much to
meet her, ami ask if she will name
an hour when you may go to see
her. This Is of course not at all
according to rule, and if she does
not answer your note you will feel
humiliated, and there will be noth
ing that you can do except forget
that you ever wanted to see her.
On the other hand, there Is no
reason to suppose she will not be
delighted to know you.
• • •
Dear Mrs. Post: 1 am secretary
to Hie president of a large dress
manufacturing company and am
often introduced to customers. Is
It proper, whether the buyer Is a
man or woman, for me to rise and
shake hands?
Answer: Tills depends upon the
particular circumstances of your
own position. If you have had any
amount of personal correspondence
with these buyers, you would rise
and greet them. If they are
strangers, you would probably fol
low the conventional impersonal be
havior of an office employee.
Dear Mr. Post: I am having a
party for u friend who is staying
with me. Do I mention her name
first, or those of my guests (all
women) when Introducing them?
Answer: Name of older person
usually said first. But unless the
formal “may 1 present" Is used,
which name Is said first Is of no
renl Importance.
AGAIN, INTRODUCTIONS
PJEAH Mrs. Post: My son calls
all young people, those newly
met as well as old friends, by their
first name always, and says that
Is the way they are Introduced,
and he takes It for granted that
he Is expected to start using their
first names Immediately. Just how
far Is the use of first names car
ried without offense to propriety?
Answer: If by propriety you mean
that approved by the young and
modern, 1 should say that all our
bright young people, within what
they consider their own circle, dis
card Mr., Mrs. and Miss. And all
up to sixty, who optimistically think
they can be mistaken for twenty,
follow suit. I am merely report
ing—not recommending this prac
tice—excepting among friends. The
never relaxing Miss and Mister of
the 90s went to the other extremes.
Somewhere between the two would,
I think, be ndmlrable.
• • •
Dear Mrs. Post: I am planning
to give a tea (at which my engage
ment will be announced) Rt the
home of a new-poor society woman
who has recently opened her large
house and manages teas, lunches
and dinners as a means of swelling
a depleted Income. I am having
my Invitations engraved hut I am
not sure how I am to tell people
that the tea Is not at my home. (2)
Must I Introduce tny guests to this
professional hostess, who Is a cul
tured person but not a friend of
mine at all? (3) In the newspaper
account of the announcement party,
must I explnln where I had the
tea?
Answer: Put the address of the
tea-room on the invitation. Then
In the lower left corner engrave:
It. s. v. p. 2 Park Place (your own
address. (2) No. She Is on this oc
casion a professional caterer. (3)
Where a party Is given Is usually
included. If you do not want to
mention It, you can say Instead that
Mrs. Jones of 2 Park Place gave a
tea to announce the engagement of
her daughter, etc. Or, If you are
living nlone, that Miss Jones, of 2
Park Place, gave n tea, etc.
• • •
Dear Mrs. Post: My aunt Is hav
ing a reception for an Important
stranger. She wants me to open the
door for the guests. Please tell
me Just what I do because I have
never been to a reception.
Answer: You would not do any
thing further than tell the men
where to leave their hats and coats
and say “good evening" to your
friends.
C by Emily Po»t.—WNU Sirvto*.