If any of you "bu— "oops1* I moan ,r moneybags• .who live outside and
wou - a wish to invest your- " bubks” 'in our vast, newest, biggest, and
b-at ..'fate, just context any ^labkan and he will bo glad to invest it
i\u- y-ri. You will not regret taking advantage of this, wonderful oppor
tunity - That Is if you don’t care much for your money,
(This is a paid ad but we haven’t got the pay and probably wont.)
G 0 OP IN ITI ONS
i
k Cynic: a guy who became soured on optimism and becane a pesimist
and then become a cured on Pessimism so became a Cynic { wonder what
happones when ho becomes soured on cynicism) ( Heaven forbid])
••-■■■■ .•Si1
^n Idiots a guy who is smart enuf to xra.ke other people think he doesn’t
know anything and the result is that he knows that they know that he
knows nothing. h :
Communist: a guy who is a slave for the government sq that the other
Slaves can live up to his lowly standards.
• •#
Capitalist: A guy vh o works for himself so he can live up to the
Jone sis. * ■ ■ *
Friends: People who have a mutual enemy and different ambitions.
Martyr:
the don’
he si13
a guy who is unhappy unless people will do him dirt and if
t ho figures ways to “egg” them on and if they still don’t
and imagines they' are being mean to him anyway•
A Cordovan: n guy who lives on the coast and work3 like mad all summer
so he can pay last winters bills,so that his credit will be good'for
the ccraning - winter.
Please do not be alarmed, shook up> panicky, or disturbed if you do
not receive your Gazette in the winter months. The hditcr is consider
ing taking the winter off and we know that*you will all be waiting
breathlessly until the first issue in the spring.
THci OLD CYNIC1S COLUMN
By; 0.^,Nelson
Down In the hills and Hollers of Missouri whore the big oaks, .and
poison ivy grow and where the Old. Cynic growed up until he was 'chased
out for stealing horses the phenomenon of growing from childhood to
manhood was a proud time in the life of a boy but it also had its brief
but distressing moments. The boy was restrained by a few burly compan
ions while the wise old nan of the clan siezed a jagged piece of flint
anu sav ed ofi ?.\ bic 01 undesirable • Territory, thus making things more
workable ano sr.tisiactory. This little chore was known as circumcision
i*nd while lb was temporarily distressing the victim was happy to have
tuls childhood Territory changed to a much more desirable State.
wo. ulaskone have been telling the world loudly and often that wo have
vast resources and can damn well take care of ourselves and do not need
ony special consideration, and we have persuaded -a decided majority in
the 48 States that thi3 is true'. We can live grandly on our own ’’vast
resourcesM. Uncle get out.
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