CHUCKLES
_ i
Adam and Eve wer naming the
animals when along came a hip
popotamus.
“Ih, look at that funny one,” set
Eve. “What’ll we name it,”
“Let’s call it a hippopotamus,”
sez Adam.
“Why hippopotamus?”
“Just look at them hips!” sez
Adam, “an’ whatta potamus.“
-|
Dear Editor—I am in love with '
a homely girl, but she doesn’t seem
to care for me, while a pretty girl
with lots of money wants to marry
me. What shall I do?
Marry the one you love and
send me the name and address of
the other one.
Many a man who thinks he is
far-sighted is a poor judge of dis
tance.
__
The church was crowded for the
Easter service. The minister, re
calling many Sundays when there
had been few worshipers, gave
way to a puckish impulse and
said:
“I realize that there are many
here who will not be with us again
until next Easter time. I take this
opportunity of wishing them a
merry Christmas.”
Hotel Clerk (to arriving guest):
“Pardon me, sir, but will you tell
me what that coil of rope is for?”
Guest: “That’s my own individ
ual fire escape. Since all these
hotel fires I carry it along for pro
tection.”
Hotel Clerk: “I’m sorry, sir, but
all guests carrying their own fire
escapes must pay in advance.”
______________
Very likely what Admiral Byrd
tried to find out is if the world is
flat at the poles, also.
As one of the most perfect ex
amples of selecting the most ef
fective selling angle I am remind
ed of a story I first heard during
the war. The officers of one of the
colored companies were having
trouble getting the darkies to sign
up for sufficient life insurance
and detailed one of the negro non-}
corns to help. This non*com pre
sented the proposition in this way: j
“If you is insured Uncle Sam
values you at $10,000.00. If you1
ain’t, Uncle Sam don’t stand to J
lost nothin’ if you die. Now, I
leaves it to yous—which bunch of
men is Uncle Sam goin’ to send to
the front line trenches?”
Legal Blanks at The Nugget office
NSLI WILL PAY
DIVIDENDS—LATER
A plea to veterans not to direct
inquiries to the Veterans Admin
istration regarding dividends on!
NSLI policies was made by the1
VA's Northwest branch insurance!
service this week.
While dividends will eventually ,
be pnid, the task of calculating
them is a tremendous task and it5
is imp >ssible to estimate how long |
it will take to accomplish the job, j
George LaFray, director of the in- j
surance service, said.
Veterahs will only place an ex-:
tra heavy burden on the VA by j
flooding our offices with inquir
ies, LaFray warned. Dividends j
will be paid automatically, based
on the amount of insurance the
veteran has carried, the length of i
time he had held the insurance
and his age at the time he took it
out.
As NSLI is mutual insurance, |
surplus from gains and savings
belong to the policyholders, La
Fray explained. In calculating
premiums, it is necessary to make
assumptions about future mortal
ity and when mortality is lower
than expected, savings arise which
are refunded as dividends. War
casualties have no bearing on div
idends, LaFray stated, because ex
cess costs resulting from death or
total disability due to the extra
hazards of military service are
borne by the government and paid
from a special fund.
FIRST CAVALRY
TAKING RECRUITS _
11
The 1st Cavalry Division, one of
six famed Pacific units now open
to direct enlistments for three-year
volunteers, is a mechanized outfit
doing occupation duty in Japan.
Known as “Cavalry Troopers,”
men of the 1st were the first to en
ter both Manila and Tokyo. Ear
lier, they fought one of the wildest
battles of the Pacific war, captur
ing the important Momote airstrip
on Los Negros in the Admiralty
Islands and then holding it against
wave after wave of counter-attack
ing, hysterical Imperial Japanese
Marines.
MRS. HERB ENGSTROM
LEAVES FOR THE KOUGAROK
Mrs. Herb Engstrom and son
Donald are in town enroute to the
Engstrom mining property in the
Kougarok where they will spend
the summer.
Announcing - - -
$
%
- The Opening of the
Nome Flying School
Piper Trainer, Piper Super-Cruiser
CIVILIANS - VETERANS
Permit for G. I. Training
For information consult
LESTER BRONSON LOUIS SOHA
Owner Instructor
'.'
SILVERMANS LEAVE FOR
STATES ON BUSINESS TRIP
i
Mrs. Rose Silverman and
daughter Julia left for Seattle last
Monday on a buying trip.
FUNERAL FOR MRS. HENRY
STANLEY TODAY
The funeral of Mrs. Henry
Stanley was held this afternoon
from the Lavinia Wallace Young
Mission. Mrs. Stanley, who died
Monday morning, leaves her hus
band and four daughters.
CHARLOTTE PATERSON
RETURNS TO NOME
Charlotte Paterson, owner of
the Paterson Hotel made a busi
ness trip to Nome with her daugh
ter Frances.
MARK AGLOALOOK HOME
FROM HOSPITAL
Mark Agloalook, who has been
hospitalized in Tacoma for several
months, returned home Monday
and states he is feeling fine.
ATTENTION ALL LEGION
AIRES AND EX-SERVICE MEN
Memorial Day Exercises will be
held at the Nome Base on Friday,
May 30th, at 11:45. Members of
the American Legion and individ
ual ex-service men are invited to
attend. In tribute to our war dead
it is expected that all those ex
soldiers who can possibly be pres
ent for the occasion join the for
mation which will .commence in
front of the Court House at 10:30
A. M. on Friday. Transportation
to the Base will be arranged.
NOTICE
Regular meeting of Arctic Na
tive Brotherhood, Monday, June
2, 7:30 P.M., at Native Club House.
•
NOTICE
Bids*will be accepted till 5 P.M.,
June 14 for moving St. Joseph's
Hall to Odd Fellow lot on 3rd Ave.
and placing on foundation. Hall to
be moved by August 1. For plans
of foundation see S. David Mazen.
ODD FELLOW-REBEKAH
BUILDING ASSN.
Robert F. Baldwin, Secty.
Publish 64 to 71.
Nugget Ads Bring Quick Results
Classified Ads
FOR SALE—Lot 50 x 70 with 3
room house partly furnished. Call
Main 62. 49-tf
WANTED—Second hand Bicycle
in good condition. Box 96 63-2tp
COLLIES — Registered pure-bred
blue Berles—intelligent, beauti
ful, male and female $60 and $65.
Rte. 7, Box 536. Portland 16,
Oregon. 64-2t
FOR SALE—3-Room House, com
pletely furnished. Call Red 55.
64-3t
1 ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■■■■—-■ ■— — ■ ■ ■ ■■■■—■ ■ ■■
DREAM
THEATER .
—•—
1 Show May 28 and 29, 7:30 p.m.
Wednesday and Thursday
"KEEP YOUR POWDER DRY"
'Lana Turner Larraine Day
Also The See-Saw and The Shoes*
—•—
2 Shows, May 30, 7:15 & 9:00 p.m.
Friday
"NOBODY'S DARLING"
Mary Lee Louis Calhern
Also "Spy Smasher," No. 11
And "Art of Self Defense"
Flashes of Life
IT "EGGS" 'EM ON '
AMHERST, Mass. </P) — Polite
ness to hens was advocated by the
University of Massachusetts to
day.
A bulletin to farmers from the
desk of the university extension
editor, said, “Knocking on the lay
ing house door before entering will
give the hens a chance to know you
are coming and they won’t be
scared when the door suddenly
opens.”
ACTIVE THIEVES
SALT LAKE CITY, (^--Fair
mont Park caretaker Eddie Swift
reported the theft of lawn sod
from an area 15 by 15 feet. Evi
dence indicated he said, that
someone backed a truck to the
area, dug up the sod and hauled j
it away.
“I guess,” commented city parks
commissioner Fred Tedesco, “I’ll
have to put extra guards on the i
city swimming pools to keep ’em
from stealing the water.”
SEARCH CANCELLED
! NEW YORK, (A*)—A stamp ex
i hibited as the world’s most pre-!
, cious at the international stamp
! exhibition, a British Guiana 1856
j issue valued at $50,000, was miss- j
ing when officials made their daily I
1 check of exhibits yesterday.
They hastily took its mounting
! apart and found that the stamp, i
its fastening loosened by a spot
light’s heat, had slid behind a
wooden frame.
_i
BREAD SOLUTION
KANSAS CITY, (/P)—Members i
of the American association of
j cereal chemists in convention here
learned that soon week-old bread'
may not worry the housewife.
Research chemists H. H. Favor |
; and H. F. Johnson of East Nor- j
! walk, Conn., reported discovery j
of a paste solution, known as poly
oxethylene sterate, a fraction of
an ounce of which will keep bread
fresh for seven days.
Shortage of raw materials for!
the paste has prevented wide
spread use so far.
WONDER WIVES
SAN FRANCISCO, Calif. (/P>—
The Wonder Wives are organizing
to support the city’s traffic safety
campaign. The chief organizer,
Mrs. Forest Lee Jordan, said each
Winder Wife has driven at least
10,000 milfes without an accident.
Some—wonder of wonders—
have driven 25 years without even I
a parking ticket.
FREE BOOTS
KULM, N. D. (&)—Dr. Frank
P. Tolleen, back in the United
States after living in Sweden for
20 years, has discontinued one!
age-old European custom. j
Stopping at a hotel in a large'
American city on his way to his
former home, Dr. Tolleen said he
put his shoes outside his hotel
room door before retiring—ex
pecting to find them shined in the
morning.
That, he said, is the custom in
Europe—but not in America.
His shoes were stolen.
JAIL BIRDS
JACKSONVILLE, 111. (/P) —
There was plenty of chirping in
the Morgan County jail today—*
but not by the prisoners.
Sheriff Rafph Borun was given
custody of 750 baby chicks which1
were found packed in boxes, on a
country road.
Bourn said their stay in jail
would have to be cut short—his.
deputies had other duties to per
form and couldn’t tend the flocx.
* jm
PRESIDENT
TRUMAN
Has Requested
A Cut In Priees
This column for the last
month has been used to
comply with his wishes.
Watch Th;s Column
for Our New' Prices
CHILDREN’S
Blue Cliambray
Overalls
SANFORIZED
Tablecloths
36 x 36
i
i
LADIES
Wool Skirts
Sizes 24 to 36 Waist
*4.95
GIRLS
Jersey Skirts
GAY STRIPES
*2.95
1
OFF
WOMEN’S
Slack Suits
Wool and Sport Denims
CHILDREN’S
Slack Suits
Sizes 3 to 12
MEN’S
Wool Sweaters
Womens Coats
Sizes 12 to 46
Formal Dresses
ALL SIZES
Bridge Frocks
HOLLYWOOD
CREATIONS
' Sizes 12 to 42
*
JUST RECEIVED
GAUZE DIAPERS
CHILDREN’S
GARTERS
A.Polet