I think you're both making a lot of assumptions. We don't know the situation, and every child and adult is unique. There is not always a clear right or wrong. I know a lot of people that were adopted, or had dads that left at very young ages. Some end up with complexes, and others don't. It depends on the person and how they cope with the idea of abandonment. The adult's feelings are likely just as fluid. Some might not carry baggage and still want to keep their relationship with the child they raised, others might not be able to handle it.