To me it is about choices. I understand there is a psychological part to it all. But when you see a lady go back to an abuser over and over, you question whether or not you can even do anything anyway. Honestly the person being abused HAS to make the choice to help themselves. If this means asking others for help, sure. If that means asking someone to call the police sure. If that means asking someone to stop the abuser, sure. But without that first step, intervening is often pointless (unless you are trained to deal with it psychologically).