You should do things with your kids.
John is at home with his wife and kids on a Friday night and his kids want to go bowling with him.
John wants to hang out at the bar with his friends.
John calls his friends and tells them he'll be late to the bar and takes his kids first to bowling.
John pretends he doesn't see his kids and rushes out to the bar with his friends.
John's kids respect and love John and feel very loved by him.
John's kids resent John and wonder if he loves them.