apology if this is confusing i m having an anxiety attack while writing this like most people at the start of the pandemic i got sent to wfh which eventually turned into permanent wfh i loved it my job doesn t involve speaking with people unless it s on my own time and i m only in charge of a handful of people and only deal with the people who need the most help i got to sink into my own little bubble and it s coming back to bite me i ve realized my social anxiety ha gotten so much worse than it ever ha i have so much fear just speaking to other people that i feel insane acting like this recently a promotion became available and i don t want to apply i made the dumb mistake of telling my partner about the opening and he s pressuring me to do it i feel physically sick at the idea of doing this some of it is because i m going to be judged but a lot of it is because i will have to do more in the sense of talking to people i can t get away with meeting a month with people i already know it will be constant employee contact and even meeting with people i don t know i m stressed if the pandemic had never happened i could do it i use to be able to flick a switch and become a whole different person at work who only had minimal anxiety now because home is work i can t feel that separation i try to make my work in a different location within my house but it s not easy with my house set up i know i m going to have to do it whether i want to or not because we need the money and the benefit also i wouldn t be able to forgive myself if i didn t at least try but i m so scared i m worried if i do get it that i will be having constant anxiety attack until i m use to the job i just don t know if i can mentally handle that i m worried if i don t get it i will just be constantly overthinking and causing myself anxiety over not being good enough it s a lose lose situation for me and there isn t anything i can do i just want to run away and bury my head in the sand but i can t so i ll do it knowing the consequence and hope for the best
apology if this is confusing i m having an anxiety attack while writing this like most people at the start of the pandemic i got sent to wfh which eventually turned intopermanent wfhi loved it my job doesn t involve speaking with people unless it s on my own time and i m only in charge of a handful of people and only deal with the people who need the most help i got to sink into my own little bubble and it s coming back to bite me i ve realized my social anxiety ha gotten so much worse than it ever ha i have so much fear just speaking to other people that i feel insane acting like this recently a promotion became available and i don t want to apply i made the dumb mistake of telling my partner about the opening and he s pressuring me to do it i feel physically sick at the idea of doing this some of it is because i m going to be judged but a lot of it is because i will have to do more in the sense of talking to people i can t get away with meeting a month with people i already know it will be constant employee contact and even meeting with people i don t know i m stressed if the pandemic had never happened i could do it i use to be able to flick a switch and become a whole different person at work who only had minimal anxiety now because home is work i can t feel that separation i try to make my work in a different location within my housebut it s not easy with my house set up i know i m going to have to do it whether i want to or not because we need the money and the benefit also i wouldn t be able to forgive myself if i didn t at least trybut i m so scared i m worried if i do get it that i will be having constant anxiety attack until i m use to the job i just dont know if i can mentally handle that i m worried if i don t get it i will just be constantly overthinking and causing myself anxiety over not being good enough it s a lose lose situation for me and there isn t anything i can do i just want to run away and bury my head in the sandbut i can t so i ll do it knowing the consequence and hope for the best
Disculpa si esto es confuso estoy teniendo un ataque de ansiedad al escribir esto como la mayoría de la gente en el comienzo de la pandemia me enviaron a wfh que finalmente se convirtió en permanente wfhi me encantó mi trabajo no implica hablar con la gente a menos que sea en mi propio tiempo y sólo estoy a cargo de un puñado de personas y sólo tratar con las personas que necesitan la mayor ayuda que tengo para hundirse en mi pequeña burbuja y que está volviendo a morderme me he dado cuenta de que mi ansiedad social se ha vuelto mucho peor que nunca tengo tanto miedo sólo hablar con otras personas que me siento loco actuando como esta recientemente una promoción se hizo disponible y no quiero aplicar hice el tonto error de decirle a mi pareja sobre la apertura y me está presionando para hacerlo me siento físicamente enfermo en la idea de hacer esto algo de esto es porque voy a ser juzgado pero mucho de esto es porque voy a tener que hacer más en el sentido de hablar con la gente que no puedo salir con la reunión de un mes con la gente que ya sé que va a ser constante contacto con empleados e incluso reunirse con personas I don