not sure why i m doing what i m doing not sure why i m writing this it feel like there s no point in doing anything i am not happy currently and i will not have a future so why do i do anything i try to push all my problem to the back of my mind but that doesn t fix anything i still question what the point of doing anything is i m so happy i defeated this super hard bos in this game but what greater purpose doe defeating that bos have what greater purpose doe completing a video game have fundamentally i do not enjoy life so all i m doing by playing game is distracting myself it doesn t matter if said game i played add to my knowledge or expands my worldview because i know i will kill myself in the future right now i m just on autopilot for year i ve tried not to think about my problem and had hope that thing would get better but i had false hope thing haven t gotten better there s only a slim chance thing will ever get better i wish i realised this sooner maybe the fact people keep repeating that one generic line thing will get better wa why i believed they would now i ve learned hope is nothing but a coping mechanism im just so frustrated that my consciousness wa ever brought into existence why couldn t i have stayed in the void now i see no point in doing anything i m just floating here unsure of what direction to go in i m unsure if there is any point in watching a movie letalone making any meaningful decision i m stuck in limbo i told myself i d wait this year out at least but i m starting to see there s really no point in prolonging the inevitable so why am i here writing this not sure what this will do not sure about anything
not sure why i m doing what i m doing not sure why i m writing this it feel like there s no point in doing anything i am not happy currently and i will not have a futureso why do i do anything i try to push all my problem to the back of my mind but that doesn t fix anything i still question what the point of doing anything is i m so happy i defeated this super hard bos in this game but what greater purpose doe defeating that bos have what greater purpose doe completing a video game have fundamentally i do not enjoy life so all i m doing by playing game is distracting myself it doesn t matter if said game i played add to my knowledge or expands my worldview because i know i will kill myself in the future right nowi m just on autopilot for year i ve tried not to think about my problem and had hope that thing would get betterbut i had false hope thing haven t gotten better there s only a slim chance thing will ever get betteri wish i realised this sooner maybe the fact people keep repeating that one generic line thing will get better wa why i believed they would now i ve learned hope is nothing but a coping mechanism im just so frustrated that my consciousness wa ever brought into existence why couldn t i have stayed in the void now i see no point in doing anything i m just floating here unsure of what direction to go in i m unsure if there is any point in watching a movie letalone making any meaningful decision i m stuck in limbo i told myselfi d wait this year out at least but i m starting to see there s really no point in prolonging the inevitableso why am i here writing this not sure what this will do not sure about anything
No estoy seguro de por qué estoy haciendo lo que estoy haciendo no estoy seguro de por qué estoy escribiendo esto se siente como no hay ningún punto en hacer nada no estoy feliz actualmente y no voy a tener un futuroso porque hago cualquier cosa trato de empujar todo mi problema a la parte posterior de mi mente pero eso no arregla nada todavía me pregunto lo que el punto de hacer nada es yo soy tan feliz derroté a este súper duro bos en este juego pero qué mayor propósito hacer derrotar que bos tienen qué mayor propósito hacer completar un videojuego he fundamentalmente no disfruto de la vida así que todo lo que estoy haciendo por jugar es distraerme a mí mismo no importa si dicho juego jugué añadir a mi conocimiento o expande mi visión del mundo porque sé que me mataré en el futuro justo ahora sólo en piloto automático para el año he tratado de no pensar en mi problema y tenía la esperanza de que esa cosa se pondría mejor pero tenía falsas esperanzas de que la cosa no se ha puesto mejor allí s sólo una pequeña oportunidad alguna vez mejor deseo me he dado cuenta de esto antes tal vez el hecho de que la gente sigue repitiendo que una cosa de línea genérica va a conseguir mejor