i feel like i ruined my life by not taking my education seriously during high school i m unemployed and have zero goal in life i m not diagnosed with anything but i suspect that i have social anxiety depression and maybe add i have a really low self esteem regarding my intelligence but i am putting the effort into improving i m watching video and taking note on youtube about topic that i know i missed during high school in a way i do feel proud of myself but i find myself constantly pausing the video to look up a word that is unknown to me word that i feel like i should already know a an adult and i feel stupid and begin self loathing because of it i don t do this with just word though i also do this with just about any topic that i m not knowledgeable in there s just so much that i m embarrassingly unaware of all ranging between the science to world history to economics to politics to mathematics to literature even to basic english grammar there s just so much that i missed and i m feeling too overwhelmed by it all i don t know where to start to make matter worse i feel like i m being timed to learn all of these thing a i said earlier i m unemployed and i m living off of my saving i suppose i could get a job but i lack any real world skill i have nothing worthy to offer to any potential employer hiring me would just be an act of charity then there s also the fact that i m too shy to even talk to people i m afraid to open my mouth because i might reveal how stupid i truly am i have no one to talk to about this stuff because i know i ll just hear response like welp you shoulda payed more attention in school yeah i know that already what do i do now live a long miserable life until i finally succumb to old age well in that case i might a well just end it now there s no real point to this post aside from me venting a little i guess for the sake of asking a question what advice would you give to someone looking to homeschool himself i did graduate from high school btw don t ask me how because i don t know either
i feel like i ruined my life by not taking my education seriously during high school i m unemployed and have zero goal in life i m not diagnosed with anythingbut i suspect that i have social anxiety depression and maybe add i have a really low self esteem regarding my intelligencebut i am putting the effort into improving i m watching video and taking note on youtube about topic that i know i missed during high school in a way i do feel proud of myselfbut i find myself constantly pausing the video to look up a word that is unknown to me word that i feel like i should already know a an adult and i feel stupid and begin self loathing because of iti don t do this with just word though i also do this with just about any topic that i m not knowledgeable in there s just so much that i m embarrassingly unaware of all ranging between the science to world history to economics to politics to mathematics to literature even to basic english grammar there s just so much that i missed and i m feeling too overwhelmed by it all i dont know where to start to make matter worse i feel like i m being timed to learn all of these thing a i said earlier i m unemployed and i m living off of my saving i suppose i could get a jobbut i lack any real world skill i have nothing worthy to offer to any potential employer hiring me would just be an act of charity then there s also the fact that i m too shy to even talk to people i m afraid to open my mouth because i might reveal how stupid i truly am i have no one to talk to about this stuff because i know i ll just hear response like welp you shoulda payed more attention in schoolyeahi know that already what do i do now live a long miserable life until i finally succumb to old age well in that case i might a well just end it now there s no real point to this post aside from me venting a little i guess for the sake of asking a question what advice would you give to someone looking to homeschool himself i did graduate from high school btw don t ask me how because i don t know either
Siento que arruiné mi vida al no tomar mi educación en serio durante la escuela secundaria estoy desempleado y tengo cero objetivo en la vida no estoy diagnosticado con nada pero sospecho que tengo ansiedad social depresión y tal vez añadir tengo una muy baja autoestima con respecto a mi inteligencia pero estoy poniendo el esfuerzo en mejorar mi ver vídeo y tomar nota en youtube sobre el tema que sé que me perdí durante la escuela secundaria de una manera que me siento orgulloso de mí mismo pero me encuentro constantemente pausando el vídeo para buscar una palabra que es desconocida para mí palabra que me siento como si ya debería conocer a un adulto y me siento estúpido y empezar a odiarse a sí mismo debido a que iti no hacer esto con sólo palabra aunque también hago esto con apenas cualquier tema que no estoy bien informado en allí es tanto que me avergüenzo de todo lo que va entre la ciencia a la historia del mundo a la economía a la política a la literatura incluso a la gramática inglesa básica es tan poco que me he perdido y me siento demasiado abrumado por ello todo lo que no sé dónde empezar a hacer peor me siento como i m tiempo para aprender todo esto i he dicho anteriormente i m en paro