i am i live at home i have a boring low paying job housing is impossible to afford and i m in a long distance queer relationship i have bpd dysthymia cptsd i don t think that my perception of reality is something that i could ever trust i m in therapy i m medicated nothing is really helping since i have relationship destroyer disease obviously my relationship is not doing the best entirely because i can t perceive anything for what it is i self sabotage constantly and i ruin everything i touch nothing feel real and everything feel dependent on whatever is happening in the moment i don t trust myself i will continue to ruin my own happiness for the rest of my life because treatment doesn t fucking help me with this shit ive been doing some ideation thinking about a plan i don t want to die and leave everyone behind but being here is too much for me to do forever i m and it feel like i m 9 i m so tired already and i m so scared i feel so alone i just want it to be over
i am i live at homei have a boring low paying job housing is impossible to affordand i m in a long distance queer relationship i have bpd dysthymia cptsd i don t think that my perception of reality is something that i could ever trust i m in therapy i m medicated nothing is really helping since i have relationship destroyer disease obviously my relationship is not doing the best entirely because i can t perceive anything for what it is i self sabotage constantly and i ruin everything i touch nothing feel real and everything feel dependent on whatever is happening in the moment i don t trust myselfi will continue to ruin my own happiness for the rest of my life because treatment doesn t fucking help me with this shit ive been doing some ideation thinking about a plan i don t want to die and leave everyone behind but being here is too much for me to do forever i mand it feel like i m 9i m so tired alreadyand i m so scared i feel so alonei just want it to be over
Yo soy yo vivo en homei tengo una vivienda de trabajo de bajo pago aburrido es imposible permitirse y estoy en una relación de larga distancia queer queer he bpd disthymia cptsd no creo que mi percepción de la realidad es algo que podría confiar en i m en terapia i m medicated nada está ayudando realmente ya que tengo relación enfermedad destructora obviamente mi relación no está haciendo lo mejor por completo porque no puedo percibir nada por lo que es yo mismo sabotaje constantemente y arruino todo lo que toco nada se siente real y todo se siente dependiente de lo que está pasando en el momento en que no confío me voy a seguir arruinando mi propia felicidad para el resto de mi vida porque el tratamiento no me ayuda con esta mierda he estado haciendo alguna idea pensando en un plan no quiero morir y dejar a todos atrás pero estar aquí es demasiado para mí hacer para siempre me manda se siente como i m 9i m tan cansado y me temo que me siento tan solo quiero que sea más