I was asked to pick up a red bell pepper.  So, I head over to Whole Foods Market.  Great, they have a bunch of them... Whoa!  $7 a pound for a red bell pepper?  I'm shocked.  \n\n\"Goodness, that's a lot of money.\", I muse to the produce guy.  Then I get indignant.  So, in my best Chris Rock impersonation I say:\n\n\"What kind of bulls**t are you running here?  A bell pepper for seven dollars?  \n\nWhat, is there something inside the pepper? \n \nThere some kind of prize in the pepper?  \n\nIs it like a big old Cracker-Jack pepper?  \n\nWhat the f**k's in the pepper?\n\nHow about I give you a buck-fifty, and you hollow me out one of those Braeburn apples?\"\n\n-Cheap Pete