My friend is selfish and talks too much on the phone. It is annoying.
Already mentioned.
Already mentioned.
No
It is confusing that there are multiple "other" categories for the strategies.
Yo
user
null
Hi, how are you doing?
assistant
Question
I am decent. I am here because my friend talks way too much on the phone, and it frustrates me. They never want to hang up, and the talk can literally go on for hours.
user
null,null
It sounds like it would be quite frustrating for your friend to talk way too much on the phone.
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing
No, he loves it! I'm the one who hates it.
user
null
My goodness! How do they respond when you ask to end the conversation?
assistant
Question
I tell him, but he just doesn't get it. Or, he says he understands, but then just goes back to talking! Or, he may finally end the talk, but the next time we talk, he will just do it all over again!
user
null,null
I wonder what it would be like for him if you hung up the phone even after he said he still wanted to talk. Wow--that does sound annoying that he will repeat the same pattern the next time.
assistant
Providing Suggestions,Reflection of feelings
He will literally talk up to 10 minutes without letting you have a word in. As far as that advice, I have hung up, but he gets extremely offended easily.
user
null
That sounds really difficult if he gets offended so easily. I find it hard to talk to some of those kinds of friends.
assistant
Self-disclosure
I'm at my wits end. I tell him all the time. "You talk too much. You gotta stop talking at me. You gotta give the other person a turn. You gotta respect other's time."
user
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What do you get out of the friendship with this other person?
assistant
Question
Well, I've been friends with him for a long time. He's funny and can have interesting perspectives on things. Also, we have done a lot together in the past.
user
null
That sounds like a lot that the two of you have been through. Were there other times that your friends was more equally responsive or attuned to you in conversations?
assistant
Question
Oh, yes, I have other friends in conversations who can take turns and understand the concept of time just fine. I just don't know what to do about this guy in particular. I still want to be his friend, but he just doesn't change.
user
null,null
I wonder if there is anything nice you could do for yourself when you are talking to him that would make it easier to talk to him.
assistant
Providing Suggestions
Do you think I should just have a timer that goes off at 1 minute and let it beep in his face if he goes on for too long to train him like a monkey?
user
null
I can see that you are feeling upset and angry when he talks so much and that is totally understandable.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
I just need a method. Talking to him is just not working. He is hard to condition.
user
null,null
Would it hurt his feelings to use a timer like that? It may for some other people.
assistant
Information
Yea, but I might be able to slip some humour in there to take the edge off because it is so silly.
user
null
Humor is really helpful for a lot of people.
assistant
Information
Any other ideas?
user
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Sometimes, people draw or do something else distracting with their hands when talking to someone who dominates the conversation.
assistant
Providing Suggestions
So your option is to start just doing something else when he is talking? He might get the message in a subtle way?
user
null
Sometimes that is a less offensive way to retrain someone who is being obnoxious or dominant and yet who is easily offended. And, it can help preserve your sense of being grounded. The strategy works well for me with some of my family members who seem like they will never change. But, with distraction, I enjoy them all the more.
assistant
Information,Self-disclosure
This is true, and it isn't bade advice. Haha! That is funny. Yes, maybe I should find something to carry around with me that I can enjoy. I don't really like to draw...
user
null,null
Is there anything else that you like to do that would be distracting while also letting you somewhat participate in the conversation?
assistant
Question
Yes, perhaps I should just use the internet when he starts talking too much. I have a phone.
user
null,null
That sounds really helpful. Sometimes people also play phone games or with a fidget spinner. I like your idea of looking on the internet.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
This solves the problem in person, but it doesn't solve the talks over the phone, but it has been 15 minutes now and this has been helpful enough. Thank you for your solutions. You have been very supportive and kind to me I don't want to take up any more of your time. It has been a good conversation.
user
null,null
You are very welcome. I wish you all the best!
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
Goodbye. You as well.
user
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