i cheated on her
none
none
i wanted to help more
not that i can think of
hello
user
null
Hello. How are you today?
assistant
Question
i'm fine how are you doing too?
user
null,null
Im glad to hear that. I am doing well today, thank you for asking! Is there something on your mind you'd like to chat about? I'm here to listen.
assistant
Others,Question
i had a breakup just a year ago and its taking its toll on me
user
null
I'm sorry to hear that. Recovering from a break up can take a long time. How long were you together?
assistant
Question
4 years
user
null
That is a long time. I think its normal to take time to recover after a long relationship, after all it was a significant part of your life for 4 years.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
yes, we were both planning on getting married
user
null
I've struggled with the same situation. Do you want to tell me what kind of feelings you are struggling with? That is a lot to deal with, I am so sorry.
assistant
Self-disclosure,Reflection of feelings
i am very saddened by the breakup
user
null
I hear and feel your grief. Would you call it grief? Please let me know.
assistant
Reflection of feelings
close to grief but she is still alive i saw her last week and it was like a bomb was dropped on me
user
null,null
i understand. Grief is the emotion of sadness and loss, does that resonate with you?
assistant
Question
exactly
user
null
I was just going to ask you if you still see her, that must have been so difficult.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
very difficult she looks soo beautiful
user
null,null
The hollidays were very hard for me after my break up, we were going to marry like you. Isort the season and all the expectations and memories of exacerbated the loss for me. Do you think that might be making you feel worse? Have you considered that You must be beautiful/handsome for her to be attracted to you.
assistant
Self-disclosure,Providing Suggestions
i think our problem started when we moved in together i always felt soo lucky to have her because she is always perfect
user
null,null
I just want to say that the hollidays will be over soon and that may help. I'm sorry, it sounds like you loved her very much.
assistant
Information,Reflection of feelings
i loved her just too much and the holiday is not helping the matter because i felt soo lonely
user
null,null
Experts say that feeling your feelings and talking about them is really good for you to help get over a long breakup. Also that it takes a year or more to process. So know that you are doing the right things.
assistant
Information
really
user
null
I was really lonely after my breakup too. I had to make myself spend time with other people that cared about me like friends and family. Even though I kind of just wanted to stay sad making myself be around other people that reminded me of the good, perfect and lovable things about myself made me feel better and gave me hope. Maybe easing your lonliness would give you some relief?
assistant
Providing Suggestions
so you are advising me to go out more and mixed up with people
user
null
You sound like a sensitive and loving person. Those are wonderful qualities. I noticed them and we are strangers. I'm sure you have many more.
assistant
Others
you are soo kind
user
null
It sounds like you don't feel like going out?
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing
i dont know what i think of my self really i rally dont feel like going anywhere
user
null,null
It's normal to feel the way you do as you sort out what happened and how to go forward.
assistant
Reflection of feelings
ok i will do that thanks
user
null,null,null
If you dont feel like being around people, what really helped me was reminding myself of the good things about myself. Sometimes I even made a list so I didn't forget. And staying distracted sometimes helped too. Experts say coming up with some goal or project really helps.
assistant
Information
ok, thats a good idea
user
null
There are also so many articles and support on the internet, don't be afraid to just search "getting over a relationship" or 'bad breakup advice" there are so many people that have gone through this. Ypu are not alone. I know that nothing I say can take away your pain or make it not have happened, but I care that you have these feelings and I care about you.
assistant
Providing Suggestions,Affirmation and Reassurance
thanks, i will check them out thanks for the show of love
user
null,null
you are welcome. i hope you feel supported and encouraged. I know this will get better for you. take care of and love yourself, friend. you are worth it.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
i will do that. thanks
user
null
and one last thing that worked for me was when I was really fixated on how perfect my ex was, i'd make a list of why they weren't and why we weren't good together. It made me think in a more balanced way.
assistant
Providing Suggestions
really, and it worked? i will try that
user
null,null
yeah, it did work. even when all could see was how great my ex was i could at least see why we didn't work and i wanted us both to be happy so writing that stuff helped me keep it in perspective. Its been a privilege listening to you . i'm wishing you all good things.
assistant
Others
oh, thanks thanks for the advice i will work on it bye
user
null,null,null,null