just everyday life
it was refreshing to get out what was my problem
love it
I was just unsure how long it was going to last.
It was very interesting and intuitive.
hello
user
null
Hello, how are you feeling today?
assistant
Question
having a rough day.
user
null
I am sorry you are having a rough day. Can you share more about it?
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing,Question
i feel like my life is an unscheduled mess. nothing ever happens when its supposed to i plan things and it always falls through and doesnt happen
user
null,null
It sounds like the chaos and disorganization is really bother you. Is that right?
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing
yes
user
null
I can certainly understand. When my children were young and I worked full-time outside of the home, I found it very difficult to keep things in my life organized.
assistant
Self-disclosure
my partners schedule changes about 3 times a day. so i never know if what i had planned will happen or not. usually not.
user
null
I can understand why that may frustrate you. Does your partner have any control over their schedule and the changes?
assistant
Information,Question
i stay home all the time and even our plans for doing things at home fall through. he will promise to do something simple and months later its still not done its supposed to be a set schedule but something always come up and he ends up working anywhere from 10 to 12 hours
user
null,null
This can be very stressful and lead to a lot of problems in a relationship if not dealt with early.
assistant
Information
its more of the reasons why he has to work late that bother me
user
null
Have you tried hanging a large calendar and writing down his schedule as well as any plans you made? Then each morning, do a quick 1-minute check on the calendar to ensure you are BOTH on the same page. Can you tell me about the reason?
assistant
Providing Suggestions,Question
the people he works with either screw up a machine or flake out not even working an 8 hour shift. yet my other half is always the one to stay
user
null
Is he aware of your concerns?
assistant
Question
i mean i admire his work ethic but why does it always have to fall on him to be the one to stay we have talked about it often
user
null,null
I feel like I had very similar issues in my first marriage.
assistant
Self-disclosure
it makes my anxiety go crazy
user
null
Communication can be very key here. It sounds like he is dedicated to his job, which can be a good thing, but I do understand that you want to be put first sometimes as well.
assistant
Providing Suggestions,Affirmation and Reassurance
we talk often and i have actually broken down several times and cried. funny thing is im not mad about the situation itself. i just feel robbed sometimes
user
null
I can understand why that would make you feel that way. We enjoy spending time with the people that we love.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
it would be different if i didnt care or it made me mad. it just make me feel alone
user
null
Why don't you choose even one night each week, and see if he will commit to being home that one night - then plan something special TOGETHER. It could be a game night, cooking dinner together, or just sitting talking.
assistant
Providing Suggestions
we have tried that and he still got stuck working.
user
null
Also, when he is home, you could both try REALLY connecting during that time. Then maybe when he is at work, you won't feel so alone having made that connection that morning or the night before.
assistant
Providing Suggestions
we do make the most of our 2 to 3 hours together at night. otherwise i would completely break down
user
null
That is good. Does he understand your feelings or does he tend to dismiss them?
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance,Question
he feels the same way about our time
user
null
So it sounds like time together is important to him as well, and the fact that you are both on the same page about that is wonderful.
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing
we had a lot of talks about this issue
user
null
Instead of you making the plans, why don't you try giving him suggestions and have him make the plans next time? Perhaps by him making them, he will be more focused on ensuring that he can be there.
assistant
Providing Suggestions
that sound like a great idea
user
null
And then he will also see how much effort you put in! Please let me know how it work out! I wish you the best of luck! Have a wonderful evening!
assistant
Providing Suggestions,Others
thank you for your help
user
null