My friend created a separate chat for planning hangouts and did not include me.
The partner stopped responding
Hello
user
null
Hello there, how are you?
assistant
Question
Kind of angry and disappointed.
user
null
I'm very sorry to hear that, did something not go as planned recently?
assistant
Question
My friend created a group chat for planning activities and did not include me. She included people who are closer to me than to her. Almost like she is trying to steal my friends.
user
null
I see. So when she did this, it gave you the feeling of almost being replaced or abandoned by your own social circle?
assistant
Restatement or Paraphrasing
In a way. I was disappointed by the rest of them but mostly angry at her. It almost feels like she wants to be the leader of the group and feels like I am her competition.
user
null
It's definitely frustrating to feel that your support system could possibly become a source of stress and competition anxiety. Especially since it's where we're supposed to feel safe and unjudged.
assistant
Reflection of feelings
Exactly. They are supposed to be the people I can go to with my problems. Now I feel like they all had a secret which I wasn't privy to and it made me feel disconnected and untrusting towards them.
user
null
It sounds that you're a person who really does care about keeping the relationships they've invested in healthy and open. That care level can definitely cause natural anxiousness in situations like this, when the place you stand with them and what they're thinking suddenly feels uncertain.
assistant
Affirmation and Reassurance
I am a bit of an idealist. I like for everyone to be in harmony, to be nice, supportive, caring, open and honest. I don't know how to move on from this.
user
null
Right, and there are endless possibilites the mind can create outside of ideal. But funnily enough, the imagination of an idealist that lets them visualize great things can also create equally strong fears before getting answers. And thankfully those fears can be addressed outside of the head where they're made. Have you tried reaching out to these friends yourself and initiating your own plan with them since this group chat?
assistant
Information,Providing Suggestions
I talked about it with one friend. He felt bad but what I couldn't understand why he was secretive about the chat too. If he thought we were close why hide stuff?
user
null
Right, it can seem a bit confusing since you naturally would expect to feel comfortable with so much between each other already.
assistant
Reflection of feelings
Do you think it is asking too much on my part?
user
null
On the contrary, I think you might not be allowing yourself to ask enough! Sometimes, the people who are closest to us can actually become even more anxious about how something might affect your feelings. It could be the case with him too
assistant
Others,Information
Sometimes I question if it is even worth talking to them about it. People often don't want to say what they really think. Instead they just say whatever to avoid confrontation.
user
null
Some people express themselves best through their actions. Have you tried suggesting a meeting for something you'd usually do to see if they're willing to hang out just as always?
assistant
Providing Suggestions