after a long hard night be partied away at the walkabout in islington and i need a pick me up . my throat hurt and my wallet be empty and i end up chat to a drug addict at a bus stop try to sell me some petrol . today and i watch red sonja and i can honestly say that i felt much well last night than i do right now . brigitte nielsen lead a bunch of as kick warrior in various shape and size to recover a green rock from some evil queen whose motif be never fully explain . yep and it that good . red sonja isn not in a genre know for great film until peter jackson come along with a certain oscar win trilogy . in fact and the best sword and sorcery film i could think of before lord of the ring be george lucas kiddie friendly willow . perhaps and in view of this and one should go a little easy on this film . but i can not it poorly write and badly act ( with the exception of paul smith and who just average ) and dreadfully put together . the film be as convincing a an episode of the flintstone and with costume and scenery seemingly lift straight outta bedrock . consider the comic book source material and it be easy to forgive the various plot inconsistency . why sonja insists on save the most annoying kid and in this world or that one and be bewilder . his personality seem to flick from spoilt brat to polite gentleman at the flick of a switch . schwarzenegger display less charisma than a field full of cow and just go through the motion and a perfect actor for his breakthrough role in the terminator . it simple to kick a film when youre down but the fact remain that this be not a good film and by any stretch of the imagination . when nielsen mourn the death of her sister and schwarzenegger tenderly place his hand on her shoulder to comfort her and then blurt out and in that distinctive germanic accent and she dead then you know youre in for a rough ride . a few smile be raise at inappropriate point and such a the priestess of a temple who and when send plunge to their death in a hole in the ground and seem to enjoy the experience at least and judge from the orgasmic moan that seem to echo around the place . if you have to watch an eighty fantasy film that wasn not porn and watch willow ( but never take that a a ring endorsement ) . for the real thing and take yourself to your local multiplex and show peter jackson what a great job he do with lord of the ring . trust me and 11 oscar really do mean it a great film unlike bloody titanic .