ok and so i get ta start this review by say i be really expect to see this flick for month and i use to watch it trailer and think it look really cool . little do i know that the only cool thing about this cliché driven turd be precisely it trailer . at the cinema and i watch the first 3 frame of this movie and though to myself no way this movie be so bad and do not be an idiot and give it a chance . you have only see 3 minute while i roll my eye in shame . all those frame show . get this . a guy with a poker face ( because he feel nothing . that deep ) look straight at the camera in the middle of the frame . in the second or third one and he stay awake in his perfectly make bed ( because he sleep like a dead guy . cause he feel nothing ) and and his father call and and say john garden state and be me and your father . oh come on . i have see a little more than a couple flick to hate clichés such a the be me and your ( insert parent ) and how the hell be i suppose to react . represent oh and he have a tough relationship with him . uh . yeah and thats exactly how i be suppose to react . man and this be a crappy movie . anywho and a the flick go on and we learn thing about his friend and of which everyone be a alternative emo walk indie movie cliché . for example and one of his acquaintance be a guy who work in a medieval theme restaurant who speak klingon ( bizarre character plus pop culture equal your standard american indie flick ) . then we know natalie portman character and who be a copy of alissa jones ( from a movie that kick gs butt and chase amy ) and amelie and that chick from eternal sunshine . you know and smart and original ( not really ) and culture and beautiful and . in touch with her sexuality ( . ) . she listen some 70 band name the shin and give . what . theyre from this damn decade . then why do they sound like that . oh and they have no personality and ok. so she hand her cd player to john garden state and he look at her with a dumb face ( you know and love ) . a the song play on and i hear it lyric say you will love this soundtrack and it be so alternative and cool and you will love this movie and it will define you and your generation even if it be a ideological photocopy of the breakfast club and ghost world and every other smart teen movie from the last 20 year and you will drink coffee and read book you do not understand . by now and really unoriginal sh . t start to happen . he doesn not care if he die in a airplane crash ( because he be already dead . and he feel nothing ) and he let u know in a scene idea take straight out of an unknown movie call fight club . and it be a cool scene but and oh and do i mention it appear in the trailer . then in some party and and just when you think this guy be really deep and asexual he make out with a bimbo . so oh and he not such a emotional zombie after all . clever character development or just a sh . tty movie . well and let analyze that scene and it feature him sit motionless in a couch with everyone else move in really fast speed . scene idea take straight out of an unknown movie call requiem from a dream . so just a sh . tty and sh . tty movie . then they meet more eccentric ( cliché and actually ) character and and finally and one that live next to a big hole in the ground . john garden state say some crap like good luck explore your infinite abyss and the guy say . and by now i want to really choke myself and you too . and then we be gently tell that neo be jesus . oh no and wait and thats from another dumb and obvious and repetitive and overestimated and cliché piece of crap . finally ( finally . ) and some more crap happens and he enter the big warehouse showdown to defuse the bombs represent he have to talk to his dad who he hasn not see in the last zillion year cause he ( finally cool spoiler ) kill his own mom . ( you see and he kill his mom and so he also dead . and feels nothing . that deep ) . now i really expect just clever and move magnolia like dialogue between a father and a son . but this be garden state and so this be pretty much it represent john garden state represent father and i forgive you and you do not know what you be do when you drug me for a zillion year and but i know you love me crappy director dad represent no . no . i be gon na say some simple stuff cause i be not really so deep of a character anyway and like this whole movie actually and so no . john garden state represent no dad and we must get along cause we be equal individual . i mean different individual crappy director dad represent no . no . ok and you convince me . and he get the girl ( cause he no longer dead and you know ) and the movie end and i go and eat a piece of chicken that make my day . this make for trailer movie suck .