paraplegic sex . there be different degree of bad . there be toxic avenger bad . there be they live bad . there be even a bad reserve for the shaft series . generally you get the idea of bad . there be movie that be so bad that they be good . and then there be movie that be so bad you want to tear your eye out and burn them and and then mix the ash with something edible so you can digest and crap them out again . this movie be ten step below that . i read somewhere that this movie be destine to be a cult classic . which be why my wife and i decide to watch it . we like cult classic . we like the low budget movie that try so hard and and yet end up be somewhat less then serious . but this . this be so horrid . let me try it this way . you can not quit play piano now and the big competition be come upbut i do not want to play piano like mozart anymore and even though i be amazingly talented on it and and my writing skill be just above a 5th grader and i know i be destine to be a writer . okay and but just so you know and i be go to become a deranged serial killer who will want to punish you by cut off your play hand and your foot pedal leg and and then bury you alive in a stain glass coffin . that okay and because i have a twin sister that i never know i have because me real birth mother have twin and and i be purchase by this guy who wife have a miscarriage ( she doesn not know and by the way ) . and she be suffer from this condition call twin stigma and kinda like the twin on gi joe ( you know and you have to hit one to hurt the other type of thing ) and which be how i know how to write my only crappy story about her cause deep down inside i know she exist and and that be also the reason that she be randomly lose limb while she be poll dance in a strip club where she in the only one who doesn not take off her clothes ( of course flash her hooha to all the paparazzo be totally acceptable and but parish the thought that she flash a teet and get pay for it ) be because that when you cut them off my body it fall off of hers . oh and and by the way and two week after you have abduct me and she be find in a ditch and miss the same limb that you cut off of me cause of the whole twin stigmata thing and and within a 24 48 hour period and she recovers and be interrogate by the fbi and be outfit with a fully articulate artificial hand and leg ( almost the same type of hand that ash get in army of darkness and imagine that ) and have insanely wild sex with my boyfriend while my mom scrub the sink downstairs . breathe . and then once she put it all together that my father and who really isn not my father and bought ( a in purchase ) me at the hospital from my crack whore birth mother and she confront him and say the key line i know who kill me and and come to find you . she then proceed to get lock in a closet and then in a fit of poetic justice ( of course ) a you be stick your hand in the door and cut off your hand with the very same stain glass blue knife which you of course make yourself . she then proceeds to use the whole stigmata thing to our advantage and find where i be bury ( oops alive of course and cause if i die then she die ) and with her bionic woman power unearths me and break through the glass and then the movie thankfully end . all that and huh . yupincluding this really horrid dialogue . oh yeahi think i will spare everyone and include myself and and just kill myself now instead of become a disgruntled piano teacher . enjoy live with your under age stripper twin sister and because with the way you write your story and that be about the only place you be go to end up . wait . yes . before you off yourself and could you explain something to me . uh and sure . whats up with all the blue . yeah and i really do not know . it something that the director come up with to be deep and esoteric . miss the mark on that one do not they . yeah and well . nice know you . bangthe only thing that can be note from this waste be that it be prophetic . oh yes and no one would guess that this movie catch a rare glimpse of the future . the near future in fact . the future career of miss lohan . because after this and there will be no more job leave for her and other then that of a stripper in a seedy low rent strip club . don not see this and do not even rent it . if you really need to see this and i would suggest download it . and even that might not be worth the waste of bandwidth and tear on your hard drive .