in his first directing role anthony chan give u kindergarten ninja . an anti drug ( dare ) film that force you to indulge in a vast array of mind alter substance just to make it bearable . kindergarten ninja be the anthesis of a family movie while e. g. drug use and womanizing and violence . it more like a comedy and one which you laugh at . the film have an unclassified rating ( un ) a no sane person could probably sit through the entire coma induce mess . i suspect the review board simply deny it existence and see the whole premise a a joke on them and all american . it important to remember that even though this be a u anti drug film it be bring by a hong kong base distributor ( panorama entertainment ) . god only know what they saw in this diabolical mess and maybe cheap laugh at the expense of a nation . ok and so what be kindergarten ninja about i hear you ask . well and football mega star blade steel ( dwight clark ) be sentence to 90 day community service for be a drunken sex addict . what be blade punishment . well and be the model citizen that he be and he force to tutor kid at his local community center . but blade be bore and then suddenly a kung fu teach angel while bruce appear . he tire of hang out with elvis and charlie chaplin in heaven so begin to teach blade useless kung fu move whilst sacrilegiously utter memorable line from movie such a enter the dragon . blade then teach the kid his kung poo and and that about it couple with poorly stag fight along the way . the fight themselves look like they be choreograph by a mentally handicapped chimpanzee . credit must also be give to the writer and george chung ( not to be confuse with the famous 70 cocaine smuggler ) . a man who take all the bad part of kindergarten cop and hustler squad and young dragon the kung fu kid and bad news bear and etc and make them significantly more unbearable . overall and kindergarten ninja feel like a low budget homemade porno . the poor camera quality and bad sound and womanize lead actor and but no porn . just 90 minute of z grade kung fu trash . chan lack of direction be shock . i be guess he couldn not afford a boom mic so be force to use the camera inbuilt one . i really hope he doesn not direct another movie . chan should stick to produce nauseate kiddy fodder like adventure with kanga roddy . to conclude and i think that the purpose of movie be akin to music . both enhance your life and provide entertainment . have this in mind and kindergarten ninja can not be classify a a movie . word can not describe how mind numbingly banal and tedious it be . have say this and i do have to congratulate anthony chan on make and possibly and the bad kung fu production i have ever see . it so bad it bad .