agghhh . why do the italian continue to make these horrible cheap knock offs of american genre film . to ship them directly to video over here and make ton of filthy lucre and or lira and or whatever and off the poor unsuspecting american public pain . in this awful serving and which be a sequel to a film that i haven not ( thankfully ) watch ( i actually saw the first movie to cavedwellers and much to my horror ) and an idiot professor by the name of tarl cabot ( what kind of stupid moniker be that and anyway . ) be draw once again to the planet call gor . along for the ride be his friend and fellow professor and watney ( again with the ridiculous name . ) . this guy be one of the most annoying character ever put onto film . he have a contest with himself early on in the film to see how many time he can say cabot . in the space of five minute . four thousand and twelve and i think the total be . if only i would have a shovel and a way to get into the movie and that sucker would have be toast . anyhoo and cabot arrives at the capitol city of . umm . the country . planet . or whatever and of gor and call koroba . here this turkey be greet a a hero ( do the good citizen have nothing else to do that day . ) by one and all and take into the castle of the king . he in love with the king daughter and although how she stand his open mouth trout kissing be anyone guess . there a lot of misogynistic scene with scantily clad woman and and more disturbingly and an equally scantily clad albino dwarf ( be i make that up . god and i wish i be ) . apparently cabot and the dwarf be old friend ( nudge and nudge and wink and wink ) . enter at this point the venerable jack palance ( what be he do in this piece of crap . i mean and i know a job a job and jack and but come on . ) and dress in a ridiculous costume with what look like a split butter top loaf of bread on his head instead of a hat . he suppose to be the second bad guy and along with the evil young queen that the king marry ( sure and seventy year old decrepit guy and she marry you because she love you . yeah and right . ) . cabot wormy friend watney be seduce by the queen ( ewww . ) into help her frame cabot for her husband death by really sharp blade . he go on the run with his personal dwarf and and we see them wander for day in the desert ( or that what it feel like and anyway ) . during this time and we get an immense amount of buffalo shot from the two men in their tiny loin cloth . i so do not need to see that dwarf butt cheek the fifteen time or so that they show them . they see a slave caravan where the slave be wear toilet seat instead of collar around their neck and and the dwarf unfortunately stop cabot from drink some poisoned water . dammit and herve and couldn not you just have let him die . we would all have thank you and believe me . they get out of the desert and save a slave girl from the market . cabot give her a lecture about love freely ( who do this guy think he be . john brown cabot . ) then he go back to the capitol city to try to rescue the princess ( who be in a wrestling match with a pair of lesbian ) and stop the evil queen and her creepy old high priest adviser ( palance ) . of course he succeed and when in reality this guy would have have a much chance of win the day a he would have have successfully hang glide off of mt . everest . you would at least think that the utterly infuriating little toad watney would have be kill by the queen and but no . the last scene be of this total moron walk down a road in america ( for america and read italy ) and still wear the lame as costume he get in gor . once again i have to take my hat off to the italian and who love make film with scantily clad well oiled idiot pretend that theyre big and bad swordsman and wizard . these aren not even b grade film theyre more like z grade for the most part and although most of them do have the laugh factor go for them and since theyre pure italian cheese of the stinkiest kind .