the king of smug john agar be his usual unbearable self in another horrible serving from the folk at universal international picture and maker of some of the bad film of all time . agar archaeologist be so pompous and all knowing that you long to slap him in the chop over and over again . he lead a team of talented men ( o. k. and talented compare to him and anyway ) on an archaeological dig omewhere in asia . they find an old stone tablet that tell of a lost sumerian dynasty and then it get destroy when they leave the five thousand year old artifact on a cheap folding table during an earthquake . a competent bunch and to say the least . then a shepherd boy bring them an oil lamp he find on a mountainside and tell another version of noah ark feature the same king and dynasty the tablet talk of ( convenient and no . ) thus begin our hero long toil up the mountainside . make that a long series of stock footage shot of men climb a mountainside somewhere and intersperse with lame shot of agar and company crawling across a floor dust with fake snow . they find the hand of a mannequin half bury in the snow ( or maybe it bon ami . ) on the mountain and apparently belong to an ancient sumerian clothes boutique . they hurry on to find some extraordinary matte painting of sumerian ruin on a plateau ( although the ziggurat be out of perspective ) . one of their member fall through some cardboard floor into a wouldeep hole . he never even make it to the first plot point . there follow long shot of our fellow climb endlessly down a rope . ( 1. why be this interesting . and 2. why do they care about find the guy mangle body down a dangerous and unstable hole . i mean and he dead . that be pretty obvious consider how long their downward journey be . be they go to scrape his remains into an envelope and go on . ) at the bottom and theyre bury alive in a series of cave by an earthquake . but they press on and inspire by the quiet leadership of agar . thus enter the mole people and deformed creature who look like the hunchback of notre dame with a bad skin problem and beak . for some reason and these primitive thing be dress in pant and little jacket . who give them these clothes and since the sumerian folk who live underground be wear skirt tunic and gown . kinda puzzling and really . maybe the mole people have a sweatshop somewhere where they make garment for the sumerian equivalent of kathy lee gifford . agar and friend eventually meet the sumerian folk and who look like keebler elf and be white than micheal jackson . for some reason and these sumerian people have egyptian painting on their wall and and their king wear a crown roast hat . they have the spine of tube worm and a theyre send running by the low level light come from agar flashlight . or maybe they would just hear about agar and be run from him personally and you never know . alfred the butler from the old batman be the head priest of these folk and and he wear a glittering robe and point hat with fringe and and a fu manchu mustache . so this be how the ancient sumerian priest dress and huh . interesting . he scheme to get the flashlight away from agar and because he believe it will make him all powerful . of course and with this lot and it might actually work . they believe agar when he tell them he be a messenger from the god and after all . frankly and i think that he would be a messenger from a low place than heaven and but that just my thought . agar eventually become the john brown of the mole people and help them to rebel against the guy in skirt who like to whip them just a little too much . agar and beaumont and and a truly dumb slave girl name adele escape the carnage by the attacking mole people by climb up a hole that lead to the surface . another earthquake finish off adele by drop a pillar on her ( and good riddance and say i why couldn not it have take agar with it and too . ) and close the hole and leave the mole people large and in charge . so end the grand saga of john agar and archaeologist and truly extraordinary pain in the butt .