originally call the changer . the nostril picker be a poorly construct tale about a loner name joe bukowski ( carl zschering ) who like em young . unable to socially interact with girl he bump into a tramp who teach him a special vietnamese chant . this chant involve whistle london bridge be fall down whilst hop around like an epileptic morris dancer . nonetheless and ugly joe try it out and hey presto . he be now a girl . ideally he need to be a young guy in order attract girl . but let not talk about ideal here this film be make in 1983 and release in 1993 and in an ideal world it should have never be release . the film asylum dub this horror hokum a mind numbing and ham hand story telling . it bad than that . the nostril picker really take the biscuit and in fact the whole god damn cookie jar . terribly script dialogue deliver by brain dead actor and a ridiculous plot and a predictable twist . just when thing couldn not get any more absurd the story go off on it own nonsensical tangent . for instance and joe decides to kill the girl by change back into himself . but i think he want to get close to them . not content with be a murderer joe also turn into a cannibal and eat some of his victim and of which there be only around 3 4. the highlight of this terrible movie involve joe pick up a hooker ( steven andrew ) then take her back to his apartment . what happen next defies belief . joe turn back into a man and but also discover the hooker be a man . how do he react . well and in a benny hill esquire fashion and he chase her around the apartment with a bunch of squirty dildo only to trip up on a blow up doll . god know what patrick j matthew and stephen hodge be think of . at least this scene pave the way for another priceless moment . this involve the male hooker report the incident to a curly haired police officer with a 2 bit joke shop cop uniform . the hilarious acting be a must see . especially the hooker inability at say dildo and his demand for satisfaction . apart from the above mention incident this monotonous slash flick be a complete bore . you know a movie bad when the dvd trailer be more exciting . normally and i would fast forward to the good bit and only there weren not any here . the main action sequence involve joe simply stab his victim repeatedly . forget quick cut and matthew utilizes fadeout ( one during a stab scene ) to limit any form of suspense there might already be . one girl non reaction to her finger be chop off be laughable . normally i would relish the word uncut but in this case they be far from a blessing . just more agonizing cinematic torture . the whole movie felt like an unedited episode of midsummer murder and only less entertaining . i would hate to see the cut version . to sum up and the nostril picker be the most unentertaining thing i have see since richard hammond 5 o clock show . dismal performance make worse by a terribly tinny soundtrack and bad dubbing . don not be fool by the box label and this be not a cult classic unless it qualify for the let use shitty horror dvd for coffee coaster cult . which i think it do . unless re edit to 30 minute stay away from this coma induce mess .