woosh . man what can i say . the opening scene and maybe . we see a bunch of mongoloid barbarian with bad make up jump off the wall of some ruin . they sneak around and attack some dude with a scantily clothe captive girl . the dude run off and the mongoloid follow him and one of them stay behind seemingly to rape the girl and but instead he expose one of her breast and kidnap her . then and the dude ( still on the run ) see a horse and try to steal it . suddenly a blond god like look hero with a bad wig appear and say that my horse . the mighty deathstalker just make his appearance . the mongoloid arrive and deathstalker kill all of them ( include the dude ) on the tune of some rather inappropriate mexicano western score ( this be suppose to be a sword and sorcery flick and so what with the arriba trompettos . ) and and then go up to captive girl and expose both her breast . he start to rub them and captive girl seem to like it . she start like her lip and caress deathstalker . just when they be about to get down to it and this old dude appear and interrupt what could have be the end of a perfect day for deathstalker ( and a possible perfect end for a short film ) . now tell me isn not that the point where either a feminist would angrily switch off the movie and or any other male viewer would say this be go to be one hell of a good movie . the plot be as simple a throw a kitten from the balcony represent deathstalker must obtain the sword of justice and use it to steal the amulet of life and the chalice of magic from the evil sorcerer munkar . aside from decapitation and dismemberment and random bloodshed and retard fist fight and embarrass sword fight and this film also contain a massive amount of t. t and a $ $ shot . i initially want to add one extra point to this movie for each gratuitous shot of naked booby i could count . after 9 point ( not even halfway into the movie ) and i have to give up count . it be distract me from the rest of the movie . and the rest of the movie be worth it . totally crazy stuff . check out this mutant cat or worm like creature munkar have a a pet and which he feed eyeball and finger . and here an interesting question represent what would you do if a man in a woman body would enter your bedroom and try to kill you with a knife . the answer be simple represent you slap him around a bit and take away the knife and then try to rape him . then you discover that he actually not a woman and so you throw him out of your bed and tell him to leave your room . it work out well and i tell you . deathstalker do it too and and the deathstalker way and be the right way . deathstalker be a wonderful movie and really and as point out in other comment . the villain be vile . the woman be delicious . there blood and sex and violence and rape and tasty chicken . there a completely pointless tournament which just feature a bunch of barbarian beat and slash and hack the crap out of each other . my favorite weapon use in that tournament be a giant wooden hammer and use to beat a poor contender to bloody pulp . and my favorite contender undoubtedly be that one brute with the warthog head ( reminiscent of the gamorrean guard from return of the jedi ) . i would not reveal how the movie end and but just prepare to ravish in delight when i tell you a 4 way dismemberment be throw into the movie climax . and of course and there a wonderful display of ineptitude throughout the whole movie . see a guy be drag behind a horse over a dirt road and and the next point of view shot show him be drag over grass ( no road ) . see that awesome tattoo on the sorcerer head magically change side within the same scene ( on shot have it on the left side of his head and the other on the right ) . well and after all and munkar be a magician . it that and or this movie be shoot in an alternate universe where thing like continuity simply do not exist . as much a i enjoy this and as much a i be look forward to the other 3 installment in this series and i do have enough shred of decency leave in me to not let this movie pas . i be prepared and though and to give it the maximum amount of minimal point and just so i could be able to deduct a couple of more point for the possibly inferior sequel to follow . deathstalker might be a superbly fun and trashy and sleazy conan rip off and it also be an abominable movie .