Bob ! Your eyes look bloodshot . Did you not sleep well ?   I had a drop too much last night . I attended a banquet given by a Chinese colleague of mine . And it was startling for me to find that people are forced to drink against their will on a Chinese table .   You have it right . Alcohol is a medium for communicating emotion in China . Drinking with business partners or would-be friends is a way of solidifying friendship , especially in Northern China .   I just felt embarrassed if I refused to drink when people toasted to me . But if I keep gulping down one cup after another , I'm afraid I would feel unfit or sick .   You lose face by refusing to drink , and the host might think you refuse to give him face . The right thing to do seems to be drinking yourself into incoherence until you throw up . This will endear you to your friends .   A few guys even threw a drunken fit last night , crying hoarsely and bawling whole heaps of nonsense that I never understood .   Then he must be opening his heart to the friends . In a word , as long as you demonstrate a readiness to drink more in spite of already suffering extreme discomfort , no one will jeer at you . 