An open letter to Ibn Battuta. I wonder what's in the secret compartment today. Oh, appears to be some kind of fake beard. Movie magic! Stan, why did you do this to me? Dear Ibn Battuta, Bro, I love Twitter and my Xbox and Hawaiian pizza, but if I had to go into the past and live anyone's life, it would be yours. Because you were this outlandishly learned scholar who managed to parlay your knowledge of Islam into the greatest road trip in history.