(05/10/00)["Making love to Lance."] Paulina and Lance and the boys are with me. We are outdoors. Maybe camping, on vacation. Lance is very attracted to me. I find him sexually exciting. He lies down beside me, eager to be close. I tell him we mustn't make love because Paulina and the boys are near by. I want to make love to him. I feel the sexual desire. But I also feel guilty about hurting Paulina. The sexual desire seems stronger than the concern for Paulina. I lean into him, making sexual moves against his penis. We both want it. Then I see Paulina, who is suspicious. I pull away from Lance and talk to her, feeling guilty.