I am handed a program by my sister Lydia. First she brings me a bowl of ice cream and an apple pie slice. I ask if there is sugar in it. She says yes. I say, "I guess I have to find out sometime if its OK to eat." I eat it and am o.k. I am looking at the instructions in the book she gave me. A man is watching, behind me. I start to cry, deep hurtful sobs and he says, "You there, the one crying, shut up." As he says, "Shut up," I yell at him, "Shut up." I keep crying. I write down who has helped me to find myself. I write Peter and then add me and Peter, me and ____, me and ____. I also write in Bonnie and Ginny. I see a miniature man's hat. I'm supposed to put it on. One the next page is a note to me if I decide not to go on. It's a pep talk of some kind.