Mud Lake Cabin  I'm in woods with my friend Kevin Simpson and two other people. More people are coming; we see them as they come over. Among them are my friends Bubba Hacker, Sam Kingsley, Wyatt Belzer, my roommate Stephen Ramos, and others, including some women. They come and greet us. There is a pause before Sam and I greet each other. We are assessing the changes that we have gone through since last seeing each other. There is a cabin at Mud Lake. I'm staying there with friends. There is a lot of sex going on that night. I see Sam, Kevin, and Stephen's erections and compare them to my own in terms of length and thickness. I see one of them grabbing onto two trees, posing.  The overhanging bookshelf in the dining room at home in Oak Valley falls. Everyone is safe, but narrowly. At the cabin, there is very hot incense. I burn it, put some fort of a cookie around it, and people eat the cookie off my leg when the cookie is soft and mushy. In the morning I get up at the cabin. I may have been with someone that night. I'm naked. I open the window. It is cold and snowy outside: there is a blizzard. My high school friend Marybeth Neumann is there. I know that my dad is gone and that his house is empty for two weeks. I think I should take advantage of the empty house. I'm with my ex-girlfriend Annie Thomas at home in Oak Valley. We go upstairs to my sister Ramona's room. There is a bed off to the right of the two main windows. There are two blankets and no sheets on the bed. A few of my friends are downstairs but won't disturb us. I give Annie cunnilingus, and then we have sex. She seems a bit uncomfortable. She has betrayed me. She got involved with another man this summer. I want to ask her if they had sex with him, but I don't ask. His name is Mr. X. He has to come to her house for something, as if she is pregnant and they need to deal with that. She shuts off the lights in the room, so she doesn't have to look at me. We lay there. I shut the music off, but it keeps playing. I shut it off again. I hold her off to one side. She is not feeling what I feel, not acting, and not responding. I recognize this, but don't want to accept it