I was the housekeeper for a man and his young son, similar to the movie Sleepless in Seattle. I had been working for them for nearly a year when they began the search for a new wife for the man. I was in love with him by this time. They found his new wife and I was experiencing the expected feelings about the entire situation, but I did not end my employment there. I did not feel the marriage would work out and I didn't want the man to feel worse when he found himself without a wife or a housekeeper. Shortly after they married, the wife became pregnant with their child. She gave birth to twins. Shortly thereafter she left him but took the twins with her. He was heartbroken and I for him. Within a month or so after she left she returned with the children, but only to leave the children with him to raise. She said she was not ready to raise the children. The man was a fisherman by profession. He had numerous fishing containers setup outside his house. They mostly had wood frames made of 4x4 beams. They were around 4 _ feet tall, 7 feet long and 2 or 3 feet wide. The top ledges were only a few inches wide. I took a bike outside and was riding very fast around the ledges of these various containers. They were all full of water. I don't know if they had different kinds of fish in them or what exactly was in them. The man's mother was concerned for me that I was riding a bike around these ledges, especially since I was riding so fast and turning practically on my side as I made some of the corners. I was somewhat frightened and yet surprised at how confident I felt in my ability to do this successfully. The man gave me a net the size you would use in an indoor aquarium and some ziplock bags. He sent me to one of the containers to begin catching fish. I found I was just as successful using my hand as using the net. All of the fish were about the size of aquarium fish but some larger than others. Some seemed impossible to see, either because they were so thin or because of their coloring. I'm not sure which. Others were larger and blue and white in color. I filled one bag. There was a lot of discussion going on between this man and his parents about this woman and the children. At this point the man was my ex-husband, Darren. When the woman returned with the babies we were in the midst of having a yard sale. Each of the containers now had flat tops covering them and we were sitting things for the yard sale on them. I found boxes of jewelry that I had put away because they were related, primarily, to my marriage to my ex-husband. There were a lot of earrings that were bride & groom and such. There were other earrings that I asked Bev if she would allow Mari Kate S to wear. Bev tried to describe what she would want to wear and what she would be allowed to wear. Jody S was also trying to help clarify for me. Mari Kate S finally came out and was looking through them. I picked up a few pairs and pointed them out to Bev and Jody S. They were some of my favorites from the past that I had been saving, hoping they would come back in style. Kay H brought a number of things out that I loved. Some of it was jewelry but others were knick-knacks I was quite surprised that she didn't tell me to just take the things I wanted. After the yard sale was over we were moving everything back into the garage. Kay H and Darren didn't think I knew how to properly care for the twins, so I let them take care of them and I concentrated on organizing the garage. Ray H had a few shelves in the garage with various glass and plastic items sitting on them. I wanted to put all like items together and move the glass items to the sturdiest shelves. In examining the shelves I realized that one was simply made up of a nylon fabric and resembled a kite. It also had hinges so it could be dropped similar to a drop leaf on a drop-leaf table. I realized it was useless for storage. I went to another shelf that was a huge half-circle that protruded far into the room. I was trying to move some of the furniture and things along the walls so I could move around more easily and get to these shelves more easily. In doing so I nearly knocked quite a few of the glass items to the floor. Actually I think I did knock some of them off but don't recall anything breaking. Near this one unusual shelf was also an unusual metal rack on the wall that was being used to hold glasses and such. This rack rested flat against the wall but hinges allowed different sections to be pulled just far enough away from the wall to allow you to slip an upside down stack of glasses on it. There were quite a few pieces, 100 or more, of one type of blue glassware. Some of them were on this wall rack and others were on the large semi-circular shelf. I was going to put them all on the shelf but then realized that shelf would not support all the weight. I was going to put them all on the rack but then Kay H came out and began telling me how to do that as well. Just for fun, someone suggested some kind of contest involving the number of garage sale items we were each working with. An adult was to represent a child. I was representing Rachel S. I would have won except that I did not get my items counted fast enough, primarily because I had so many more than the others. which is, oddly, what it took to win but you had to have them counted in time too. We are back to dealing with and arguing about the care of the twins. The size of the twins kept changing. they weren't even as big as my hand. At another time, one was nearly the normal size of a newborn and the other was less than the size of my hand. Then they were pieces of paper rather than actual babies, but each baby was two pieces of paper rather than just one. There was some discussion about where the twins would sleep and where Darren and I would sleep. Certainly, I had no desire to share a bed with him as the mother of the twins had done and yet somehow that seemed to be critical to the nocturnal care of the twins. The bed was not a normal bed however. It was more like a sofa with a cot in front of it. We each sat on one end of the sofa and stretched our legs out onto the cot. For some reason it was finally decided that I was to leave and take the twins with me. It is unclear to me if I was to take them permanently or if I was taking them on a purposeful journey. I was to take this journey on horseback, alone with the twins. There was a man helping me to prepare the horse, saddling him and putting the things I would need in the saddlebags, etc. I am traveling on a Native American pilgrimage with Matthew. I have the sense that the purpose of this pilgrimage was primarily for Matthew but somewhere along the way I realized that I was and would continue to derive as much if not more from this journey as he would. We had several things that Matthew had to accomplish on this journey. I believe it was to include two nights out in the woods. There were a number of people on the same journey, so we found we were not alone in figuring out what to do or knowing what we needed to do or how to accomplish those things. I was glad to know this. We became very fond of our fellow travelers. I became more in love with Native American Culture than I had even previously been. The people were wonderful and the traditions and rituals were so rich and wonderful. The rituals were wonderful not just because of the ritual itself but because of the transformation Matthew and I, and others, experienced as a result of completing each ritual. there was something that would be beneficial for Matthew to acquire. Oddly, the only way he could acquire it was to purchase it. It was quite expensive and I realized that neither he nor I could, or should, spend that much money on that item. An elderly Native American man sold it to us for what we told him Matthew had in his bank account which was around $16.99. I felt bad because we lied to him. Matthew had nearly $35 in his account, which was the actual price of the item. I didn't want Matthew to be totally broke so I lied to the man about how much money Matthew had. This struck me as particularly odd because I knew I wouldn't normally do this. When Matthew was writing the check to the man, I made sure he kept hidden the total from his check register. There were several scenes in which the entire group was riding horseback to our next destination or ritual. We were told that for one of the rituals Matthew would need to entirely undress. I knew Matthew would be uncomfortable with this but understood the purpose of the ritual and thought it would be very beneficial. I realized how beneficial it would be for me so I participated in the ritual as well. It was incredibly freeing, as though my soul had been freed. It was exhilarating. I became totally hooked on the entire process and future opportunities. When we settled into our campsite for the night we were preparing meals. I was having a little trouble contemplating eating the food that we were expected to eat. I couldn't bring myself to eat the first thing. The next thing they brought was the foot of some very large animal. It still had the fur on it and everything, but it had been cooked. I cut off two toes. I gave one to someone else and then I ate one. I was surprised that it didn't taste too bad. It seems that I was even eating the fur and didn't mind it. In our next ritual we were given some freedom in how we completed it. Given how great it felt to be able to complete the ritual of being completely nude in front of all these strangers I decided that I would remove most of my clothing and due a Native American dance around the campfire. Everyone admired the progress I made and my new level of confidence. I thought about the twins, thinking something like oh, yes. The twins. I pointed them out or said something about them to the others. Later I thought, wait a minute. I started out with the twins. I can't just not have them in the dream anymore. So I remember thinking something about having them in a type of papoose on my back. We are now sitting in another location talking about future similar, but advanced, journeys we can complete. We would do so in a certain order. To progress to each journey we would need to adequately complete the requirements of the prior and be living a certain lifestyle. At this point I am writing notes on a piece of paper about the things I need to do so I can achieve this level and move on to the next journey. Some of the things this included were writing on a more natural kind of paper and wearing different kinds of jewelry. like more things with feathers and such. There was some type of Native American title that went with the completion of this journey. I can't remember now what it was. It started with a T. Tahoe? Tecumseh? I don't know now. While we are at this place there are also containers sitting around for trash and other things. I was trying to get all the trash into the right container, as I knew that was a perfect example of this new lifestyle. At first another woman or two was somewhat deterring me from what I was attempting. They did not see it as that important. Then someone came around to collect the trash and had a momentary conversation with me about it and I realized that I was right. There were also binders and books sitting around. The speaker was talking about various things we could do to complete the various journeys. She mentioned something about Deepak Chopra. I recall seeing other names. There were other rituals but I don't recall what they were now. I went on a short horseback ride with someone else. There was something sexual about this experience. I was trying to help this other person heighten their sexual awareness or be able to get more pleasure from sexual experiences. On our way home I was riding with a man I had just then met. We clicked immediately and fully.