So! I'm working at the Hillside Library, with Will. But today, even though it's insanely busy, he's not helping out at all. He's on the phone, talking with his boyfriend Bryan, who currently lives in Boulder or Denver. Right then Will walks out, and I pick up the phone to see what they're talking about. I say "Hello? Hello?" but they completely ignore me: in the background, quietly, they're talking about stocks. Finally one of them addresses me directly, and says: "You know, there's some kind of SubGenius thing going on in town tomorrow..."  I set down the phone in order to help a patron. This patron begins to talk about a book that he just read, telling me all about it, in the long winded way a patron will sometimes do when there's a thousand people in line. As I listen to him tell the story, I enter into it myself: I see my father standing at the telephone in the kitchen at their house, and he speaks in a voice-over:  "My father, your grandfather, is in his last days. He never called much before. But the last two days he called me at SEVEN in the morning to talk about his grave and burial with me..."  Now I see my grandfather, Bob, smoking a pipe and standing outside a huge grey building. (Yes, my grandfather really IS named Bob, and he really DOES smoke a pipe.) His voice starts in:  His voice sounds like William S. Burroughs. "One day I came to work at the silk factory... Jones is dead!" We see him, shocked at learning the news. "Came in the next day... Wilkinson is dead!" We see him learning the news from a secretary, fear growing. "Next day another one had died; the following day, another!" He's in front of the silk factory again: "I know that I'm next."  The next part is somewhat confused, but somehow, my grandfather has already died and his ghost is now chasing me around the front of the silk factory. He wants to freeze me to death with snow. As I run down a path around the factory, I think the following 'profound' thought: "He's got nothing on me, because if I beat him, I live; if I die, I'm dead." He corners me in a large chicken coop, but somehow, I knew we had 'agreed' to meet there in some secret way. But there's already somebody there: a tall, thin, dark-haired woman in a skimpy, red, white and blue one-piece swimsuit. This woman I recognize as one of the models in a stretching book Laura and I had been using through January. She's going to help me against my grandfather's ghost. Grandfather Bob very tersely says to her: "Get out of the coop. Now." And snow begins to blizzard around him.  At this point the story dissolves and I'm back in the library again, talking to the patron. I tell him: "Thanks anyway, but I hate fiction like that." Will, in the meantime, has come back from his break. He tells me: "Hey! I won a million dollars on the stock market!" He hands me the phone. Bryan is repeating in a monotone voice: ONE MILLION DOLLARS FOR WILL... ONE MILLION DOLLARS FOR WILL...  I tell Will, "God, Will, it's busy today. Can't you help out a little instead of talking to Bryan?" As I wake up I think that if the ghost killed me that I at least knew there was an afterlife because a ghost killed me.