I got invited to go see The Ring I thought it Were probably a musical aboot hobbits Started out promisingly enough Little fellow running round and there was trees stuff And a shelter from a storm, and a girl it seems Though the dialogue dont make no sense to me And her husband come out, he look a little menacing Says he gonna eat you like a little piece of venison When its um... morning I guess? Im confused Does the wife know the hero? There seems to be clues Theres a sword in a tree. Whys a tree in the house? Did she slip her man a mickey? How come Siggy dont get aus? How come neither of em making for the hills right now? As for brothers loving sisters, isnt this disallowed? Isnt this kinda how bad fates come about? Im gonna need an intermission just to figure it out How here comes poppa, hes the oneeyed jack Brnnhilde is the daughter with the armor on her rack. Does he lack in discretion? He backs up quick Daddy Wo dont ever seem to step to Ma Frick She got him by the thick of the beard, shes insistent But the subtitles flickered and I missed it Odin doesnt get to get his son killing dragons? Still sounds like a job for the elder Baggins. He cant even incite his daughter to fix fights? Im about to go to sleep in my seat, alright? cause the musics hella stupid it dont got no beats And thats the 22nd time I heard the leitmotif And I cite no grief but opera aint for me Its for the kinda people yo who listen to the CBC And sip on tea, and read up on the paper Another intermission coming Im gonna be the great escaper... Sneaking out the lobby, I got ushed by an usher Showed me to my row and he reminded me to hush up I settled in waiting for the boredom to commence Definitely unprepared for whats next When the strings set in and the horns come chasing Its kind of like I just got rewarded for my patience This is more like it. This I could keep Ladies in helmets who ride eight deep Grooving down in the seat, Im rocking squirming Even almost got over the fact that theyre talking in German Im learning I might even have to come back Wonder if they sell a ticket for just the third act? Asked on the way out, did I follow? I say, sort of And I gotta say Im glad it werent the Rings that theres a Lord of Saw a lot of similarities but Im pretty sure That this was an adaptation of Star Wars.
intermission, brnnhilde, ushed, promisingly, leitmotif