My father was a lawyer, moms at university My brother and my sister, they both have their Ph.D My grampa was a pilot shooting Nazis from t he sky But I am the most famous, Im a TV weather guy He smiles at the camera and tells a little joke H e always says its sunny if the telestrators broke Thinks a meteorologist knows what falls from the sky But hes got a steady income as a TV weather guy They said that Im not qualified to be on the TV Dont know Celsius from Fahrenheit so I just say degrees I just read the temperatures and make up a bunch of lies And end up being right more than the guy on channel five He smiles at the camera and tells a little joke He always says its sunny if the telestrators broke Thinks cloud are made from cotton that have blown up to the sky But hes got a steady income as a TV weather guy On Saturdays I must be out of bed by five A.M Put on a ton of makeup and then stare at the camera lens Greeting all the viewers with a Hihihiphello! Cause its the day I have to host a kiddie cartoon show He smiles at the camera then to his puppet sock He raves about the crayon drawings of the family dog Did a promo at the shopping mall and made the children cry Hes a lousy clown but a good TV weather guy They said that Im not cute enough to be an anchorman Not tough enough for sports and for the arts I was too bland But I know that some day I will reach my TV goal When I guest star on Baywatch or 90210 Til then Ill smile at the camera and tell a little joke He always says its sunny if the telestrators broke He wonders why big storms are always named for other guys But hes got a steady income as a TV weather guy Hes got a steady income as a TV weather guy!
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