[Verse 1] Ive got a bitter pot of je ne sais quoi Guess what, Im stirring it with a monkeys paw Since I saw you coming out of my barbers shop In that skimpy little halter top Did you light the candles? Did you put on Kind of Blue? Did you use that Ivy League voodoo on him too? He thinks hell be alright, but he doesnt know for sure Like every other unindicted coconspirator [Chorus] Mata Hari had a house in France Where she worked on all her secret plans Men were falling for her sight unseen She was a genius [Verse 2] Theres a face in every window Of the Songwriters Neighborhood Everybodys your best friend when youre doing well I mean good The poet who lived next door when you were young and poor Grew up to be a backstabbing entrepreneur [Chorus] Albert Einstein was a ladies man While he was working on his universal plan He was making out like Charlie Sheen He was a genius [Verse 3] When you dropped me and you staked your claim On a V.I.P. who could make your name You latched on to him and I became A minor inconvenience Your protege dont care about art Im the one who always told you you were smart You broke my heart into smithereens And that took genius [Instrumental Break] [Verse 4] You and the barber make a handsome pair Guess what, I never liked the way he cut your hair I didnt like the way he turned your head But theres nothing I can do or say I havent done or said [Chorus] Everybody needs a place to stand And a method for their schemes and scams If I could only get my record clean Id be a genius
genius, barber, unindicted, halter, protege