Don't know what to say but i'm happy to whrite this and i'm so glade to know someone like you don't feel down easy to life coz ur religion when it hard on you that's mean it's the right way and i remember hadith said ur like holding on an embers صل الله عليه وسلم and owr way to live nowadays that's agree with hadith said we live like a strangers so i insiste that u start to know about islam and coran and stay strong with all who will disagree with coran and sonnah that u know it