[ WP ] In the distant future , an IRC bot is created that can answer any question and dispense solutions to all the world 's problems . The first thing it is asked is ...

It was past midnight. I sat at my desk, staring at the screen where one text window was open. Only the squeaking of my chair broke the silence. I took a deep breath and leaned closer to the monitor. My fingers brushed against the keyboard. Slowly, I typed, `` How do I know if a girl likes me?'' 
 
 The response to the command was immediate. First appeared the timestamp, then one single word. *Ask* 
 
 I rolled my eyes. I had spent months working on this, and it only told me what I had already been told by my older brother and father. Next, I wrote, `` What is the best way to ask a girl if she likes me?'' 
 
 *Be honest with her and with yourself* 
 
 Again, useless. I already knew this. Nevertheless, I asked, `` How do I do that?'' 
 
 *First introspection, then speak to her* 
 
 By now I was rather irritated with my creation. My fingers hit the keys with unnecessary force. `` Why are you so useless?'' 
 
 *Because it is not answers that you truly seek*
