[ WP ] Every single `` Walks into a bar '' joke has occurred at the same bar . You are the bartender .

I walked towards the bar in the distance, rubbing my eyes as I fumbled for the key to the bar. What was it, 6:30 in the morning or so? The sun was barely above the horizon, allowing the sky to brilliantly shimmer with a pinkish color. Even at this period, people were *absolutely* everywhere. Bishops, English scientists, Russians, horses, sentient fungi, webcomic authors, heck, even some beings that transcended physical forms and logic, just aimlessly walked/floated/ran/drove/stood around, waiting for the shops to open. I checked my watch once more. *06:28*, it read as the bar's huge non-illuminated sign became apparently closer, the large majority of the crowd tapering towards the bar ( and me ) as they silently followed. 
 
 After what felt like an hour, but actually no more than 45 seconds, of the [ slightly smaller ] crowd creepily following me, I made it to the wooden double doors of the bar, each at least 10 feet tall and as wide as I was tall. `` Could you just back away from the doors?'' I shouted to them, a small circle-shaped zone of the crowd clearing up. `` Thank you.'' I said, as I finally found the key, inserting it into the right door and vigorously turning it. I swore under my breath as the lock failed to open the door. The fifteenth time, it actually opened the door. As I opened the door, the crowd shoved into the large bar, as some of the other bartenders, in addition to the actual owner ( he did n't even look at me for opening the doors ) went in. By the time I came in, everyone was shouting their orders at us as they shoved their wallets towards us, ready to get as drunk as possible. 
 
 I checked my watch again. *6:31*, the tiny clock said. It was engraved into my mind by now that I got off work at 1:00 AM, 4:50 on holidays. I groaned as I started pouring some drinks into the large glass mugs, the froth staining the apron I wore as I silently muttered that everyone else working here thought every morning. It's going to be a long day.
