[ WP ] You live in a world where stereotypes are absolute

Dan whipped out his stapler and put nine staples around the information poster with no particular pattern. `` You sure about this, man?'' asked Augustus. 
 
 `` It's science, of course I'm sure. We just have to get enough people believing people named Augustus have huge dongs and it'll come true, fundamental law of the universe, just like people named Chris are super boring and wizards are more racist than nazis.'' 
 
 Augustus sighed and took out another poster. HAVE YOU HEARD THE NEWS? it asked in bold lettering. AUGUSTUS ON THE RISE. `` I really think we could've done better than'big giant dick' for stuff to give me if it worked like this.'' 
 
 `` Yeah, the poster says you're smart too. Did n't you even read it?'' They rounded a corner and Dan stapled another posted to the first wooden surface they came to. He used fifteen staples, all on the bottom half, then Augustus held up the top and put one in each corner. `` Thanks.'' 
 
 `` No of course I did n't read it, Augustuses ca n't read remember?'' 
 
 `` Right, right. Anyway that's on the poster too. Brains, brawns, reading, it also suggests you have super powers but you're too much of a class act to show other people up by using them.'' 
 
 `` Good powers?'' 
 
 `` It suggests, it does n't outright say, so I dunno. That was a hard part to do. Do n't be so picky.'' He pulled a pen out of his pocket and wrote *not choosy* near the bottom of the poster, at the end of a sentence talking about how people named Augustus are exemplary gamblers. `` You're getting a big old floppy horse dick out of it so everything else is gravy.'' 
 
 `` I just feel like if we could manipulate stereotypes this easily someone else would've done it already. Why is n't the stereotype that all humans are attractive and poop candy?'' 
 
 `` Because everyone knows that ninety nine point nine nine whatever percent of everyone is really sheeple. If you really want to change the world, you need vision. You need a *maverick*. And right now, today, with these posters, I am that maverick.'' They found another visible surface and Augustus neatly stapled his poster. `` This is the start of an arms race, mi amigo, just you wait. In a year you're going to be the first of a race of ubermensch, everything's going to change.'' 
 
 `` All because of a maverick named Dan?'' Augustus asked. 
 
 `` What else would you call a maverick?'' 
 
 `` Steve. Nikolai. I dunno, Tony?'' 
 
 `` It's my green eyes, man. That puts me over the edge. Everyone knows that green eyes are lucky, and what could possibly be luckier than knowing the first Augustus?''
