[ WP ] Every single imaginable apocalypse happens simultaneously .

So this is how I die. Sure, Rick is over there being smothered by bunnies. Carol is about to choke to death on an overabundance of Oreos. 
 
 Do n't even get me started on Gavin. That fucker is about to die because he suddenly learned how to fly but has no idea how to land. 
 
 Here I am though, running away from a demonic being who is hell bent on cutting off appendages instead of vital organs. His guttural voice calling for my everlasting pain and agony. 
 
 Good thing I do n't have a chance to stop and see Sarah over there dying from the inevitable apocalypse of old age. That little whisp of a voice reminding her that she'll only live until her 80's. Maybe 90's if she's healthy and stops smoking. 
 
 Maybe this is how I really die. Maybe my apocalypse is dying of jealousy. Maybe my heart gives out from the strain of knowing how much better everyone else's death is than mine. 
 
 Just then I feel the hot, sharp pain of a blade slicing off my left had and I realize. Nope, still the goddamn demon killing me ever so slowly.
