[ WP ] The Devil now sends Billy Mays out to sell people on deals with the Devil .

`` But wait! There's more!'' 
 
 Harold shoved the red-skinned Billy Mays out the door and slammed the door shut. There was a reason he kicked out his TV a long time ago and paid a small fee for his SuperAdBlocker. 
 
 `` I do n't care, Billy. You stay out, you hear me? You already cost me my mariage because my wife believed everything you said! But you wo n't have me! You hear me!'' 
 
 `` But now in return for your immortal soul, you can have everything back the way it was! You'll only pay 99 cc of blood in administration costs!'' 
 
 Harold almost had a heart attack when the voice screamed into his ear just inches away from his face. The Devil-Billy was looked at him with a stupid grin on his face, the likes of which he had n't seen in a very long time. The grin was so distracting that he almost missed all the pots and pans that were piling up in the living room. 
 
 Almost. 
 
 `` Get the fuck out freak! And take your damned pans with you!'' 
 
 Mays' grin became even more wide, which Harold thought to be impossible. The fact that it did freaked him out even more. 
 
 `` Those are your mandatory welcome gifts which you paid for when you offered your black cat to His Deviousness! But wait! If you sign now, you'll even get that baby boy you never wanted ^ ( in exchange for his soul as well ofcourse )! Is n't it amazing!'' 
 
 `` Wait, what? I never offered my cat? My neighbors ran over it a few years ago! And you leave my boy out of this! You hear me! God, give me some earplugs or something against this guy!'' 
 
 Mays grin changed into a slight smile. `` Oh I can assure you that God^TM approves of this! And, as a matter of fact, do we have a deal for you! Just sign here to make sure you'll never be bothered with this kind of thing again...'' 
 
 -- - 
 
 Harold stared at his computer screen. He thought it funny that it was so peaceful and quiet. He did n't even bother to look around in horror as the gigantic stash of pots and pans descended upon him. Then again, he did n't have ears to hear the crashing with...
