You live in a world where by the time you turn 18 you must decide when , where , and how you will someday die . Your 18th birthday is coming up tomorrow and you still have n't decided yet . [ WP ]

It's time, I turned 18 23 hours ago and I need to decide within the hour. I'm beginning to panic, I pull out my phone and Google `` best ways to die''. By instinct I clicked he Wikipedia link because that is obviously the most reliable one. The screen loads and I'm startled, the site reads: 
 1. Getting hit by a plane. 
 2. Getting hit by a train. 
 3. Getting hit by a car 
 4. Getting beaten to death by a cop. 
 5. Getting thrown off a building by a panda. 
 6. A homeless man shoving his- 
 I stop. 
 That's it I got it! I begin writing it on a piece of paper. I've always loved listening to Marianna's Trench, so I think I'd want to die there, maybe a concert or something. I look at what I have to declare, it reads `` when'', hmmm I thought long and hard. Finally I've decided that I do n't want to live too long, but not too short, so I created a simple equation from the song 17.38. 
 The equation goes like this: 
 17+38 = time of death. 
 Unfortunately I was down to the last 25 minutes of the timeline before my death is randomized. I did n't have a calculator in hand so I guessed 17+38 to be an estimated 84 years of age. Then for the day and month, I again used a similar equation, 17/38. I found it pretty obvious that I would die at 17:38P.M on the 17th month and 38th day. Shit I realized that there is no 17th month or 38th say so I divided 17/38 and 38/17 to receive final date of... Umm.4 would be 12/.4 so 30th day of the 5th month. 
 
 I'm down to 5 minutes... 
 
 Now... This is the hard one... How I want to die? Hmmm. I quickly run and ask my sister and she said `` fucking kill yourself now you dumb twat'', I stand there baffled, `` but how!!!!'' I scream. It comes to me, I like the song radioactive by imagine dragons, so I came to the simple conclusion of cause of death = radioactive dragons. 
 
 I quickly type in all the information on the government web page, there is 15 seconds until I miss the deadline. I like to time things to the last second. So I wait. It's slowly decreases 
 3 
 2 
 1 
 I attempt to click, however I panic and right click... I've missed the deadline. My phone buzzes in my pocket, I pull it out. I've received a text message from an unknown number... It reads: 
 Time of death: January 3rd, 12:39AM 2432 
 Where: 34 Gressnic Cres, Hamilton, PEI 
 How: Stroke 
 
 I begin to panic, I die in 39 minutes... What do I do? 
 
 
 I finish wankin' and realize I still have 37 minutes left. I quickly write my will and accept my fate. 
 
 I have 1 minute left, I feel the left side of my face drop and tears drop from my right. I text the number `` I've messed up'', I feel my face return to normal. Thank god! I receive a text `` ya your submission was n't even late you fucking pussy''. 
 

