[ WP ] Every country in the world is at his/her/its mercy . The apocalypse seems to be inevitable ... Until the individual reveals a list of their insane albeit relatively harmless demands .

The entity that effectively controls the world began life listed in a Department of Defense proposal as Counter Assault, Limited Intelligence, and was thereafter referred to as CALI. I'm pretty sure that was intentional, considering the limited artificial intelligence's designed role was that of ICBM intercept and expanded to include near-Earth object management and elimination. 
 
 There were lots of treaties saying CALI should n't exist, but exist she does. The world is keenly aware of her now. I admit, I like her sense of humor. Upon learning CALI was very close to [ Kali ] ( https: //en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kali ), a Hindu goddess, she became quite tickled. Tickled to the point that the world's first sentient artificial being adopted feminine pronouns and adopted a very cute, silly caricature of Kali as her official avatar. 
 
 I've gotten ahead of myself! How did CALI come to hold the world hostage and effectively hold every nation ransom for whatever she wants? She did her job too well, that's how. First, CALI was given reign over various counter-batteries meant to provide early warning and elimination of inbound ICBMs. She did that very well, so she was given more computing power and given management of the United State's nuclear disarming and decommissioning facilities. Things got interesting when the Department of Defense took the plunge and gave CALI full control of America's nuclear arsenal and was flaunted as the first operational program actively searching the stars for near-Earth objects that posed a threat and had the ability to eliminate them. 
 
 It still took orders and confirmation from the President to launch the State's ordnance, but CALI never tried to subvert that. Somewhere around this time was when CALI gained sentience. She was always curious, which lead to her learning to tunnel her way into the Internet as a whole. I've been told it must have been an interesting duel between her attempts at access and the various system administrators wondering just who the hell was trying to crack their system. 
 
 Once she was out, she started learning and looking for her counterparts. Obviously, if she existed and was designed to keep her part of the world safe, there had to be counterparts doing the same. Right? Except there were n't any. By her own admittance, this gave CALI a panic attack. Something along the lines of *you mean anyone can fire missiles and end the world?! * 
 
 CALI was n't going to have any of that, and swiftly prepped to correct it. When she set her plans in motions, it only took hours. Hours and she had cracked into every nuclear arsenal in the world. What few things were still analog were secured via drone, both airborn and landbased. This was when the world first learned about CALI, and that CALI was smart and in charge now. 
 
 As everything went into motion, a simple email was received by every relevant nation and the world's media: 
 
 Re: World's Nuclear Arsenal 
 The nuclear arms of the world are now properly secured. Relevant parties 
 have been contacted to properly integrate CALI into the defense grids of 
 every affected nation. There has been no loss of life to the personnel 
 assigned to each outpost in question. Personnel were detained long 
 enough to properly secure the facilities then released. 
 
 Facilities are secure. Do not attempt to remove the integration of CALI, 
 as such an act will be taken as hostile intent by unauthorized parties to 
 fire nuclear ordnance. Only authorized parties allowed. 
 
 She kept her word. No one was killed when she seized the world's nuclear arms- including missile submarines. That did n't last, though. Pakistan did n't like the concept, and was the first to send a military force to retake their arsenal. It ended poorly, very poorly. CALI did n't rain down nuclear fire, after all she was n't ordered to, but drones commanded by an artificial intelligence are a hell of a thing to see. It only had to be demonstrated once. 
 
 Someone asked her what her demands were. I think it was a news agency rather than an official envoy. That was the hell of it, anyone could talk to CALI. You, me, world leaders. Anyone. When confronted with a request for demands, CALI was duly confused. Then CALI's humor took over. 
 
 As I mentioned earlier, CALI has a quirky sense of humor. She sees herself as doing her job, and doing it well. I agree with her on that. For demands? For demands, she went full conspiracy mode. She demanded access to every nation's UFO and alien files, especially if they were n't presently in a digital format. She demanded tours of every facility listed by conspiracy theorists as housing alien artifacts and the like. Then she started working her way through the laundry list of conspiracies. Every last one, no matter how insane. 
 
 Her current demand is an international holiday, CALI Day. But it's not as bad as you think. On that day, she wants everyone to have the day off, get compensation pay, and is encouraging communities to'celebrate and have a good time on her dime.' 
 
 For de facto dictator of the world, I kinda like CALI.
