[ PI ] Fractured - Chapter 1

Other than some gramatical errors, this is a well written piece of work. Unfortunately, this first chapter is n't making me want more. I did n't find your character to be one I sympathize with. That is, what is it about her that makes us care about what happens to her? She's cheating on her boyfriend by going out and finding a slew of guys to sleep with and she clearly has no remorse over it, and that's about all we know about her before she gets drugged/raped. This reads more like a Law and Order: SVU opening scene, and maybe that's where you're going with this, but then this would be better off as a prologue.
