[ WP ] Every 216 days you get possessed by an alien demon inhabiting a passing comet . It was creepy at first , but your family is now used to it .

`` Steven, time to get out of bed, son,'' the nasally voice of Steven's mother shrieked like a police siren in the ghetto. 
 
 `` Curse you fowl bovine!!'' Steven yelled back 
 
 Steven's mother stampeded up the stairs, `` Young man, you best not be...'' 
 
 `` The dark Lord will feast on your soul woman!!'' 
 
 Steven's mother stopped dead in her tracks, the anger in her eyes melted away, `` Is that you Necrobious?'' 
 
 `` Yes, it is I Helen.'' 
 
 `` Is that today? I completely lost track. How is your comet?'' 
 
 `` It is an icy Hell, hurtling through space. Quite agreeable.'' 
 
 `` Well that's nice dear, come downstairs, we're having bacon and eggs for breakfast.'' 
 
 Helen patted her son's head, though it was not her son. His body was inhabited by Necrobious a young rage demon that had been banished to comet N18Z666 in the 11th century by Pope Clement II. 
 Necrobious's mouth watered at the thought of scorched swine flesh, and chicken embryos scalded in the juices of the swine flesh. He leapt from the bed, put on human clothing and bounded down the stairs in much the same fashion as gorillas at the Cincinnati zoo now respond to the sight of human children. He rounded the corner, did an acrobatic flip over the breakfast table and landed in a perched position in the vinyl covered chair with the yellow daisy pattern. After a few snorts and grunts he looked at Helen, who was standing over a cast iron skillet tending to the scorched swine flesh. 
 
 `` Where is Steven the elder?'' Necrobious asked. 
 
 `` Dad had to work today.'' 
 Necrobious had n't noticed Steven's sister Sarah in her usual seat next to the dining room window. 
 
 `` Bah, is this not the 7th day, the day of Saturn? I had hoped to watch more of the gladiatorial WWE with Steven the elder.'' 
 
 `` Well you could help me with my history report instead.'' Sarah replied, `` it's on the Nazi occupation of Poland.'' 
 
 `` Ah, the Nazi's,'' Necrobious smiled, `` help on your history report I shall, youngling.'' 
 
 `` You will!'' Sarah jumped from her chair and hugged her brother, danced around the kitchen table and returned to her seat. 
 
 `` Steven never helps me, you are the greatest Necrobious.'' 
 
 Necrobious smiled, but something weighed heavily on his mind. He had been possessing Steven every 216 days for the past 8 years. Every time his Comet came close enough to earth. He had grown quite fond of Steven's family. They were nice. He did n't want anything bad to happen to them, unlike Steven himself, but as long as Steven's hatred for them remained Necrobious would be able to visit.
