[ WP ] The person sitting next to you on a plane leans over and says , `` Do n't ask me how I know this , but this plane is going to crash before it reaches Newark . ''

I was just dozing off on the flight 368 to Newark when the man sitting next to me leaned over me and said, 
 
 `` Do n't ask me how I know this, but this plane is going to crash before it reaches Newark.'' 
 
 I looked the man up and down sizing him up. He looked like your average white male, nothing distinguishing him from anyone else on the plane, a really forgettable face. 
 
 `` Look asshole I'm trying to get some sleep.'' 
 
 `` Do n't you believe me?'' 
 
 `` I do n't. And if you do n't want an Air Marshall all up in your shit making your life a living hell I'd shut the fuck up and leave me alone.'' 
 
 `` You're not going to say anything to anyone?'' He asked again as the plane hit some turbulence. 
 
 `` I'm going to say to you to shut the fuck up.'' 
 
 A flight attendant walked up to us. `` Is there a problem here sir?'' I looked to the man sitting next to me. 
 
 `` I think you should have the Air Marshal talk to this guy.'' 
 
 `` Air Marshal?'' The flight attendant asked confused. 
 
 `` Look I know there's one on every flight.'' I said growing tired, I really just wanted to sleep. 
 
 The man sitting next to leaned over and pulled something out of his back pocket, `` But I am the Air Marshal.'' 
 

