[ PI ] Searching for Samuel - FirstChapter - 2705 Words

Hello! 
 
 Thanks for writing this! I wanted to give you some feedback! 
 
 Your writing is very clean and practiced, and it is easily one of the better ones I came across in the rest of the Group. You have a knack for presenting your ideas very clearly, and following your story was a breeze. I think you introduced a lot of your concepts organically, without shoving them at the reader, and I felt like I got caught up in your world before I even knew it. 
 
 As for feedback on how to improve the story, perhaps one point would be that I would have loved to read more about the conflicts your main character was having, and a bit less on his preparations for his journey. In a way, once you had established your main character ’ s strengths, I wanted to see how he would apply them, and I thought that the final fight scene could have been extended or focused on so that I can get the satisfaction of seeing your character dealing with problems! 
 
 I ’ m off to read other entries in Group N now, all the best! 

