[ PI ] The Delicate Wasteland of the Brain - FEB CONTEST

So I thought this was great. I liked the pacing and tone of the first half especially. From the comments I know there are some suggestions about the dialogue, but I really enjoyed it with the lack of dialogue. For me it set a tone to the story, and Hana's lack of control, that made sense. 
 
 My only difficulty with the story was when additional venues were added after the first run through. When Hana woke at the temple the first time I assumed that had never happened before. After reading more, I think that was part of the normal cycle. I just could n't be sure since I had nothing to compare against - it was hard to appreciate the nuanced differences in the world when I thought entire scenes were aberrations. 
 
 Anyways, that may just be me. And regardless, I thoroughly enjoyed your story. Good luck!
