[ WP ] Every single `` Walks into a bar '' joke has occurred at the same bar . You are the bartender .

`` Alright, listen up!'' Mike the Bouncer shouts at the long queue waiting outside the door. `` Next up we have Bill the Screwdriver... is Bill the Screwdriver here?'' The bar is packed tonight, not as many rabbis as usual, but still busy nonetheless. I watch as a screwdriver with legs enters and finds a seat while I pour a second scientist a glass of hydrogen peroxide ( `` I'll have an H2O, too!'' ). 
 
 `` Alright, what's my line?'' I ask into my Bluetooth headset. The screwdriver is waiting patiently, its plastic hands folded in front of it. 
 
 `` Okay, it looks like you're going to say'hey, we have a drink named after you!' to the screwdriver. Say it like you're surprised to see him.'' ( *Screwdriver: 1 part vodka, 2 parts orange juice* ) I set the hydrogen peroxide down in front of the second scientist and walk over to the screwdriver. 
 
 `` Hey,'' I say with a surprised look, `` we have a drink named after you!'' The screwdriver simply looks at me for a moment. I hear sudden screams of torment and pain from the second scientist. 
 
 `` You have a drink named'Bill'?'' And with that he hops off the stool and makes his way out of the bar. 
 
 `` That's the entire joke,'' my manager says through my headset. `` No actual drinks involved.'' I shake my head and sigh. At least I'd never heard it before. The `` put it on my bill'' one was so overused that we had a **NO DUCKS ALLOWED** sign until the ACLU made us take it down. 
 
 `` Next up!'' Mike the Bouncer yells as the first scientist carries his dead friend outside, `` Length of rope, then group of miners! Someone tell the Scotsman, the Englishman, and the Irishman they're on deck!'' 
 
 It's going to be a long night.
