[ wp ] Alien creature is trying to have sex with you but its biology is so bizzare you do n't even realize .

**As the chancellor of the Galactic Federation, I welcome you, the one called Charles O'Malley, Ambassador of Earth, to our Grand Council. ** 
 
 The room applauded, and Charlie beamed, rising to his feet. Immediately, the delegates slid out of their chairs... Which were bolted sideways onto the wall. Interesting... And then began to line up in order to greet the delegate. 
 
 The first delegate, a purple-skinned Grxxlib with at least a dozen tentacles, came to a halt. `` I am Nxx! p of the Grxxlib. Jibbensplack,'' it added, curling its tentacles into a knot and taking a bow. `` Jibben... splack?'' Charlie responded, taking a bow in turn. Nxx! p deposited ceremonial phlegm on his shoes before continuing on its merry way. 
 
 `` I, uh... Thanks,'' he managed to say just as the next delegate arrived. This one, a two-foot, green-furred generalissimo, clacked its boots at attention. `` We are the Honorable General of the Skies, Land and Super Sea Gribblechit XLVI,'' it declared proudly, before giving a salute and goose-stepping away. 
 
 The next candidate looked surprisingly human, except for the five extra eyes. `` HELLO,'' The humanoid boomed suddenly, a glazed look in its eyes. `` I AM MASTER GORZO OF THE COLLECTIVE OF ZORGO. MAY ZORGO GUIDE YOU ON THE GREAT ZORG,'' it continued as it brought a fist to its chest. 
 
 Next came another humanoid, wearing something similar to the suit he was wearing, and Charlie lifted his hand to offer a shake. The room gasped and gargled in shock. 
 
 `` BY ZORGO, HE IS GESTICULATING HIS DESIRE FOR FORNICATION WITH THE AMBASSADOR OF QUACK,'' cried Master Gorzo. `` Put it away! Put it away!'' squeaked Gribblechit XLVI, covering its eye. Even the Supreme Chancellor cringed, curling up into a slimeball. 
 
 The last thing Charlie remembered was being the first human in the Galactic Federation to be convicted of sexual harrassment.
