[ WP ] All holes can be moved , like in old cartoons . Your job as a park ranger is simple . Stop people from stealing the Grand Canyon .

`` Watch for the sneaky ones,'' Dan said, under his breath so I barely caught it. He was always doing that shit, telling me stuff offhand and then giving me shit for not hearing him. 
 
 `` It's always the Telligarians. Think this belongs in a museum where they can keep it safe instead of out here on this forsaken lump of dirt crawling with vermin.'' 
 
 `` Yeah yeah Pops, I got it already. This is like Ranger 101 here, I did four years on Alpha Centari to get my degree, I know this business.'' Geez, what kind of amateur did he think I was? He was a strange one though. Only Terran in this position I'd ever heard of. I always wondered what kind of mods he'd had done on his body to be able to sense the containment fields. It made much more sense to recruit from other species with a better EM spectrum detection and then just wear cloaking devices. He must have been something special back in the day to get this far. 
 
 `` Watch it kid, this is n't Ranger School. The Park Service is gon na trust you with all of this when I'm out, so you better learn it right the first time.'' 
 
 Just then the radio beeped then emitted a garbled shushing noise. `` Wdhethsheasitusssinovvverhhaseqydh?'' It sounded like maybe it was a question. 
 
 `` Dammit, that's Gary. He's standing too close to the warp field generator and getting cross-plane interference. I keep telling him about that, he keeps forgetting. Probably needs to go on break. I'll head up there and spell him for a bit until Alex gets in, do you mind holding it down for yourself over here?'' 
 
 `` No prob, I got this. Nothing but cacti and couple clueless Terrans to watch.'' I realized my mistake instantly. 
 
 `` People, son, people. We do n't take so kindly to that term,'' Dan said. His voice was mocking but gentle. `` See you in an hour probably. Radio me if you need anything.'' Then he leaped over the canyon rim and activated his powered glide mode, floating away like a leaf in a breeze. Showoff. I can fly too, and without the special suit, but do you see me flitting around everywhere? 
 
 Nothing to do now but wait. I picked up my ancient binoculars ( could n't they have gotten me something newer? Breaking in the rookie, I guess ) and lazily scanned the park trails I could see from my position. Nothing but a family of hikers coming up, two adults and a small child. They look Terran, but could have been wearing cloaks like mine. The child swigged from a bottle of water. Definitely Terrans then! Most of the other visitors coming here don ’ t drink water, or like myself have more sophisticated methods of staying hydrated. I sighed with mild relief. Dan was so paranoid. No one had made a serious attempt at taking it for at least five years, and it was just some Anaydif kids trying to prank their friends. Didn ’ t even have a pocket universe to stuff it into to transport, what were they going to do, tow it home? Pfft. Still, the Galactic Park Service funded a specialist position here, just in case. Hopefully I could do this gig for a few years and then move up to something more prestigious and closer-in. 
 
 Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the small family break into a sudden run up to canyon rim. “ What the…? ” The child chucked something small and silvery out into the air, and there was a shimmer and a crackle over my entire field of vision. “ Ohhhh shiiiiiitttt…, ” I said to myself as I launched myself toward the trio. It only took a handful of wingbeats to make it to their position. 
 
 “ Hey, it ’ s a Park Service stooge! Too late, dumbass, it ’ s ours now! ” The child-sized being ( for I was sure now it was no child ) yelled gleefully in my direction as I landed in front of them. “ What do they pay you to do this stupid job? Sure doesn ’ t attract the brightest ones, does it? ” The three beings flickered, and I briefly saw a single form, one that was squat and covered in bright red tentacles. “ Roger this, I ’ ve disabled the containment. Ready for pickup, ” it said, as if speaking to someone else. 
 
 My vision went dark, and when the ground shifted under my feet my balance failed and I landed on my ass. When the light came back on, I had to sit down again. It was gone. All of it. Where the canyon had been, there was nothing but a featureless plain. I stared numbly into the distance and feebly plucked a small flower growing near my foot. 
 
 The radio crackled. 
 
 “ You ’ re in big trouble, kid. ” 

