[ WP ] He sees you when you 're sleeping . He knows when you 're awake . And Santa , low on funds to pay his elves , has begun selling his surveillance data to the NSA .

The folder under his arm was almost has big as the rest of his body, but that did n't stop Ed. He was going to reveal the truth to the public no matter what happened to him. Fueled only by cocoa and a desire to for liberty for all men, women, and child, Ed plodded through the snow on tiny legs. His destination? 
 
 The Washington Post 
 
 He had been one of Santa's top employees - Able to discern whether a child was naughty or nice in mere moments. Santa often turned to Ed when he needed advice on how to pull off the increasingly difficult Christmas deliveries. Of course, he was careful never to overstep his boundaries. But Saint Nick had gone too far this time. 
 
 Ed found the bank transfers during a routine audit of his systems files. When questioned, Santa told him not to worry about it. Santa told him not to bite the hand that feeds him. 
 
 `` But sir, how can you give away all that private information? And to the NSA no less?'' 
 
 Santa met this criticism with a harsh slap to Ed's elf mouth. In that moment, he knew what he had to do. Surveying children was one thing - but surveying adults and selling the data to the United States government? That was something Ed could n't stand for. So he ran - he considered going to Russia, but he figured that if he was going to leave the North Pole then he should at least try to make it out of the snow. Getting across the ocean was the hard part, but there was a narwhal who was more than happy to preserve man's right to privacy from his government. 
 
 Once came ashore in Washington D.C., Ed had to walk the rest of the great distance. He lived in constant fear - not of the NSA, but of Santa himself. It was impossible to tell who to trust. The fat man had spies everywhere. 
 
 Somehow, Ed managed to find himself at the doors to the Washington Post with a folder full of proof of Santa's deplorable actions. He did n't know what kind of impact his actions were going to have on the world. He did n't care how many people would soon know his name. 
 
 All Edward of the Snow Den cared about was the god given rights of every man, woman, and child. And Elf. 
 
 
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