[ WP ] The `` grim and gritty '' re-boot of a beloved children 's television show goes horribly , horribly wrong . Or perhaps horribly right .

*Dammit Joe. Pull yourself together. * 
 
 I slowly raised myself from the floor between the couch and the footlocker that I was currently using as what some would call a coffee table, but what could more accurately be described as a whiskey table. As soon as I was in the sitting position, I knew I had made a grave mistake. Fumbling around the cushions of the couch, I eventually found a bottle that was not completely empty. 
 
 *Breakfast of champions, * I thought, and downed its contents. 
 
 The clock on the wall said it was two in the afternoon, but such details matter little when you have no plans other than to drink away pain. Hefting myself onto the stain-riddled couch, my gaze settled onto the framed picture of my brother. It was laying on the ground, having been knocked off of my pitiful table at some point during the night. I picked it up and held it close to my throbbing head. There he was, my brother Steve, smiling like an idiot in that ridiculous green striped shirt. He had always been odd, and his obsession with having a singular wardrobe of khaki pants and a green striped shirt was just one manifestation of that oddness. 
 
 *What the hell happened to you? * My thoughts were disturbed by a wimper from the kitchen. *Oh yeah, * I thought. *The dog. * 
 
 One of the hardest parts of coping with Steve's disappearance was watching that dog of his. If I was taking it hard, that poor animal was in hell. While Steve always personified it, I've never been one to identify human traits in animals - that is, until I saw the way my brother's dog responded to its master's sudden absence. There was an evident depression of that beast's soul that I could n't help but notice. Making my way out to the kitchen, I cleared my throat and spoke for the first time that day `` What is it, Blue?'' The dog was clawing at the base of a cupboard. I looked closely at the base and noticed the edge of a piece of paper that had slide underneath. Pulling it out, the words `` Joe, whatever you do, do n't tell the police about this letter'' greeted me at the top of the page. 
 
 *My God, Blue, * I thought. *You've found a clue. *
