[ WP ] A man orders a `` cheese pizza with no crust '' from a local pizza delivery joint as a joke . Unbeknownst to him , that pizza joint is a drug front and he just placed an order for a kilo of cocaine .

With more booze than blood running through his veins, John dialled up Fabio ’ s. 
 
 “ Hello, Fabio ’ s Pizza Parlour, what can I getcha? ” 
 
 “ Ooh, I ’ ll have a cheese, with, uuuuuh, no crusts please ” 
 
 “ That ’ ll be £15, can I just confirm that? ” 
 
 “ Cheese, no crusts. ” 
 
 “ OK, we ’ ll be there in 5. ” ( Beep ) 
 
 Even though he was thoroughly inebriated, John thought that was odd. Five minutes? For a pizza? And the guy just took his order, like that? And why didn ’ t he ask for the address? 
 
 He looked up. His future flatmates were attempting to microwave textbooks at this point, so he was doing better on average with the drink. Cards against humanity lay abandoned on the table, a lonely shot glass sighing next to them. They had finally finished first year exams, and John was just glad he ’ d never have to see the fuckers who he shared with in halls. 
 
 He stumbled outside, cash-in-hand, to collect the pizza. The bloke took his money, handed the box over and left without a word. Rather quickly actually. It was rather windy you see. 
 
 He opened the box. 
 
 A gust flung some of the white powder up John ’ s right nostril. He was immediately lifted, high up above the ground, above the tedium of uni life. He ’ d only had a tiny tad. But it was enough. 
 
 “ GUYS, I ’ VE GOT SOME COKE! ” 
 
 Girls prised the textbooks out of the oven, making lines. Others used knives, chocolate bars, and playing cards. After a few moments, there wasn ’ t much left. 
 
 Its effects were instant and apparent. 
 
 John pushed a one of the prettier girls up against the wall, feeling his way up her pencil skirt. Almost gladly, she reciprocated, hands running, scrambling through his greasy hair. Meanwhile, Harry thought now was a great time to bring in Gibson SG and schoolboy shirt and tie. Now was the time to be Angus Young. If anyone was still in their right minds, they might have seen it as ironic. 
 
 “ Go on maaaan, show us your moves! ” 
 
 *Highway to Hell* rang through campus. Campus security heard, but they really couldn ’ t be arsed. That kind of thing is above their paygrade. 
 
 One group decided to help John with the washing up. Plates were flung left, right and centre, bowls ricocheted off the walls and what little was left of the alcohol met the floor. Eventually, couples ( I use this term in the loosest way possible ) carried their trysts to the bedrooms, it didn ’ t really matter who. Indeed, many shared. 
 
 No-one noticed the thick red fluid painting the kitchen floor. 
 
 John came. They had only met this evening, and didn ’ t even recognise each other the next day. She left early, to avoid the clear up. It didn ’ t aid her that much when he was arrested the next day, for manslaughter. After all, she wasn ’ t much of a witness. Indeed, were any of them? 
 
 ( n.b. this is my first short story. I hardly ever write. This just looked interesting and I saw it on the front page ) 

