[ WP ] You wake up and see something that anyone else would describe as mundane , but causes you to be suspicious .

I looked through the wisps of steam rising off my coffee at the intruder in the lawn of my neighbor across the street. I knew that something must be done, but I did n't want to endanger myself or others by making sudden moves. Mainly myself, though. After all, who knew what this thing was capable of. 
 
 It looked off. Unnatural. It was probably 12 feet in height and about half as wide. Its bark almost looked yellow, like there was some vile fluid pulsing through its limbs instead of sap. Its limbs twisted and turned in ways that I had never seen on a tree of any sort. Worst of all, it had shown up today in all its unholy glory. Yesterday morning it was not there and trees do n't grow 12 feet in a day. This I knew to be true. Something must be done. 
 
 I slowly shifted my legs out from underneath the kitchen table and to my left. I pretended to remember something important I had n't done and made a dash to the hallway where I caught my breath. I silently congratulated myself on the convincing ploy. That thing may be the incarnation of evil, but it could still be fooled. I was still in my bathrobe and slippers, but there was no time to change clothes. That thing was duped for now, but it could wise up at any moment. 
 
 In several furtive dashes, I made it to my backdoor. If that thing could see through walls, I was fucked. I had no other choice, though. With a deep breath, I opened the door and made a sprint for my shed and swung the wooden door open. Inside, I saw my tool of choice; a red chainsaw with an 18 inch blade. I took it off the shelf, set it on the floor, and gripped the handle to start the thing with my right hand while I put my left foot on top of the machine to hold it down. Here I paused. I knew that once I started it up, I would be past the point of no return. I took a deep breath, and pulled with all my might. 
 
 The chainsaw roared as if it was hungry. I let out a maniacal scream and charged around the side of my house, across the street, and into my neighbors yard. As I approached the intruder, I knew the convictions I formed at the kitchen table were true. This was no ordinary tree, although it was clearly trying to pose as one. The bed of mulch it sat in was freshly dug. It had probably crawled here from some hell hole to do evil in this world. 
 
 I let loose another howl as the well crafted blade bit into its evil trunk. Saw dust spewed about and it seemed that the chainsaw howled with me as I ended the existence of this evil timber. As my blade tore through, I realized that this shrub had one last bit of evil planned. It was going to crush me under its weight as its final act of spite. It did n't plan on me being such a quick thinker, though. Letting go of the the chainsaw before it had torn through the trunk completely, I dove to my left. The tree, already committed to its hateful act, creaked and fell on the spot where I had been only a moment before. 
 
 I breathed a sigh of relief. I had taken the life of evil itself. It was then that I noticed five me sitting on the curb in front of their flatbed truck. They had a strange look of being both astonished and tired, as if they had done a difficult job and were now witnessing something spectacular. I noticed the lettering on the side of the truck: BARTLETT'S EXOTIC TREE PLANTING. 
 
 I wished I was at least wearing underwear.
