[ WP ] A man orders a `` cheese pizza with no crust '' from a local pizza delivery joint as a joke . Unbeknownst to him , that pizza joint is a drug front and he just placed an order for a kilo of cocaine .

`` If there's a crust I'm not giving you a tip,'' I stated in as bitter of a voice as I could muster immediately as I pulled the front door open, `` and I *mean* it.'' 
 
 `` Uhhh,'' stumbled the delivery driver, who had enough tattoos on his face and neck to make even a callous giant like me nervous, as he tried to come up with a response. I wondered to myself how he'd even managed to find a job at all. `` You have fun with that, buddy. Be seein' ya *real* soon.'' He finally answered, albeit cryptically and with an genuine impatience that rivaled my joking. He shoved the pizza box into my hands and turned around. 
 
 `` H-hey! What? Do n't you want your money?'' I exclaimed, after a moment of confusion, to the tattoo'd delivery boy as he was walking back to his car. 
 
 He quickly turned back around and sneered as me, making a cutting motion across his neck with his middle and pointer finger and grabbing at the crotch-region of his shin-length jean shorts, `` You better shut that fuckin' mouth right now if ya know what's good for ya, old man.'' He nodded at me with a disturbing confidence. ``..Be seein' you *real* soon.'' 
 
 I shut the door gently, verbally beaten into submission by a man half my size. Terror coursing through my veins and beating in my heart, I proceeded to open the pizza box. I stared is disbelief at the gallon-sized bag housing white powder in place of where a pizza should have been. I'm not the brightest man in the world, and I had n't had much experience with drugs, but I know for sure that this was a shit-ton of coke. My face went red and it started to become difficult to breathe, but before I collapsed to the floor the doorbell rang. A burst of adrenaline released itself into my body and for a moment all my fears dissipated. I was prepared for war. 
 
 I turned around and SWUNG the door open hard enough to put a hole through my drywall. Glaring and grunting like an animal, I assumed a crouching horse battle stance and challenged my opponent. It was at that moment I realized the person at my front door was n't the former `` delivery boy,'' but a black man itching himself with white lips. `` Isthisthefive'o'clockfreecrackgiveaway?!'' he shouted, looking past my in search of the goods.
