[ WP ] Death is looking for you , but you try to convince Death that you are not the person Death is searching for .

Now hold on there, I'm not sure if I'm quite the right person you're looking for. Are you sure it's William *Jefferson* Clinton? I'm pretty sure that's not me. If I am not him, then who IS him? Well, that depends on what the meaning of the word `` is'' is. 
 
 See, if `` is'' means is and never has been, that is not... that is one thing. If it means that I AM not, well... that's a completely true statement. Now, if someone had asked me the other day, are you William Jefferson Clinton, asked me a question in the present tense, I would have said no. And it would have been completely true. 
 
 How? Is n't it so clear? Let me break it down for you. I'm Bill now. Some people call me President. What's in a name? 
 
 Whoa, whoa, hold on there. Hold on there. I said hold on there. Look, Death. 
 
 I feel your pain. I really do. 
 
 Back in Arkansas, I had this young woman, a single mother from Rayburn, Arkansas, a small town with real, down-home folk. She came to me and she said, you need to help me find my boy. And I said to her, I said, `` Rita, I'm gon na do what I can... to find your boy.'' And I said to her, I said, `` Rita, what's his name?'' And you know what she told me? Go on, I see that grin on your face. What did she say? Well, I'll tell ya. She said his name was John James Smith. John. James. Smith. Every John James Smith I found was the wrong one. I could walk the four corners of the continental You-Knighted States, throwing rocks every which way and hit at least three John James Smiths in every state. 
 
 Even if it used to be me, that's in the past now. You oughta go back. Did you know that the human body regenerates all its cells after 7 years? It's like the Ship of Theseus. Now Theseus was this young Greek man who had a ship, but the ship was a bit leaky. And bit by bit he replaces each part until, basically, the whole ship has been replaced. Now, if you're the repo man, and you want to repo the boat he took from you seven years ago, and he shows you the pile of timber that used to be that boat, well there's nothing really proving him wrong on that. 
 
 And besides, we only use about 10 % of our brains. Did you know that? So, really, I'm only about 10 % of William Jefferson Clinton, even if I were him, which I am not necessarily admitting that I am. 
 
 And, furthermore, there's something else you should know, which is that during my presidency... 
 
 Death shook his head, shrugged his shoulders, swung his scythe. 
 
 EDIT: Added an ending.
