[ WP ] We finally get men on Mars and they discover an old Soviet flag placed down decades ago . The Soviets won the space race but for whatever horrifying reason did n't say anything .

It was happening all over again. 
 
 Director Franklin's Top Secret clearance within NASA had enabled him to read the archives to find out for himself the real history of man's quest beyond our planet. But even he could n't believe the same thing could happen again. 
 
 His mind raced back to the archives... 
 
 1945: As Berlin fell to the allies, plans were drawn up to divide the conquered German nation. Divided in half, the county's East was soon to fall under communist Soviet Control, while the West would be administered by the tri-party French, English and American alliance. Thus began the Cold War. 
 
 What many do n't realise is why it was called the Cold War – The Russians raced to seize control of the coldest regions of Eastern Europe – in particular Lapland in the Finnish arctic circle. Here in the town of Rovaniemi, a man named Claus, was known to have developed secret technology far eclipsing that which the allies sought to obtain from the defeated Germans. Sure the Americans got the bomb, they got the jet engine, they even got the rights to Hogan's Heroes. But Russia's aim was to get Santa Claus. 
 
 And after delicate negotiations with the East Swedish ( Finnish ) government, the Soviets granted them their freedom in exchange for the man with the most advanced technology in the world. 
 
 Getting to millions of homes per night is n't easy. In more recent times, research team led by Joel Potischman and Bruce Handy has calculated the average speed Of Santa's sleigh would be in the order of 3.6 million miles an hour. This would be a sufficient speed to allow travel to the moon in about 4 minutes. Compare that to the Americans – Apollo 11 took 3 days to reach the moon. No wonder the Russians were after the big fat man. And their interest in the moon was obvious – ever seen the half moon on the Soviet flag? That were n't no sickle. 
 
 It's a little known fact that Santa did n't always have a red coat. But under Russian rule, Santa was told he would be red or he would be dead. So he did what they said. He drank copious amounts of vodka to numb the pain, excusing his drunkenness as being merely `` jolly''. But he struggled to hide the pain as his favourite Reindeer, Hans, was given a Soviet pseudonym, `` Rudolph''. 
 
 Of course the North Pole was a perfect launch pad to go to the moon too – being at the very top of the world, it was of course a shorter distance to the moon than it was from America. The Soviets had the upper hand. 
 
 Using Santa's sleigh technology, the Soviets started landing `` unmanned'' probes on the moon in 1959. Or so it was thought they were unmanned. The excitement in Moscow was palpable – As the Muscovites watched the grainy pictures of Cosmonaut Claus, they cheered the Russian word for moon repeatedly. 
 
 `` Луна! Луна! Луна!'' 
 
 Of course the Western spies heard the cries on the street, and mistranslated them to the now ubiquitous, `` ho, ho, ho''. 
 
 And as the communists watched their state owned tv's, they spoke of how the reindeer dashed across the moon's surface like comets, dancing, and prancing across the craters like a joyous cupid on Valentine's day. But the floored intelligence collectors at the British Secret Service again got things confused – hence we have the rest of Santa's reindeers' names: 
 Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Comet, Cupid, Vixen, Donner, Blitzen. The last three had nothing to do with the Soviets – they were named in honour of a particularly drunken night involving a Mr Bond and an East German fraulein named Donna. 
 
 Another misconception is that the Soviets were just trying to beat the Americans in getting to the moon. Franklin knew this was not true. The Soviets had eruditely predicted that global warming would, in about 50 years or so, begin to melt the polar ice caps, rendering the North Pole ineffective as a manufacturing, supply chain and logistics hub for Santa. 
 
 The moon however would serve perfectly – no unions, no workplace safety regulations, a better viewing position to see who's been naughty and nice – it had it all. And so it came to be that Santa set up operations on the moon. A closely guarded secret that the Soviets had gone to great lengths to protect. 
 
 And of course all this continued smoothly until July 1969 when Neil Armstrong stumbled over an empty bottle of Smirnoff vodka and looked up to see it… 
 
 A Soviet Flag. 
 
 As his eyes scanned the red flag on the monitor, Franklin's mind came back to the present moment. 
 
 Then it dawned on him - they could n't reveal it. 
 
 Santa. A Soviet - a Communist even - on Mars. 
 
 Parents boycotting Christmas. 
 
 Children in tears. 
 
 Public holidays revoked. 
 
 The economy in ruins. 
 
 No. It ca n't happen. Not on his watch. 
 
 `` Interrupt the feed! Roll the static! Now goddammit!'' 
 
 The signal from the red planet was lost. 
 

