[ WP ] You and your Arch Nemesis are forced to save the world together .

The Great Defender could n't make it into orbit without me. She can fly, and that's fine, but the meteor was on the other side of the planet and she only had about 35 minutes to make the intercept coordinates. Even at top speed it would be hours before she circled the globe, moved into space, and planted the detonators given to her by DARPA. 
 
 Do you know how hard it is to freely navigate in space without computer assistance? The human brain just can ’ t operate on that level. 
 
 So here she is asking, no, begging me to let her use my teleporter to save the world. She actually says “ save the world, ” when she speaks. It sounds so pathetic. 
 
 Unfortunately for me I don ’ t really have a choice, the meteor is going to hit relatively close to home if she doesn ’ t make it. See, she has to detonate it at least 2 million miles from Earth for it to do any good. Even then we ’ ll probably still have some strikes that flatten a city or two, but that ’ s better than the alternative. The choice is basically this: Earth can get shot point blank in the head with a.45 magnum or get hit by a shotgun at 100 yards. You don ’ t want either, but if you have a choice you “ take a Cheney, ” as they say. 
 
 I can get her most of the way out there with the detonator ( which is the size of a garbage truck if you were interested ) but it will blow out my equipment and she ’ ll have to fly/push it the rest of the way there. I don ’ t even want to tell her how impossibly hard it will be to adjust trajectory to match speed, attach, and detonate the damn thing. And I sure as hell don ’ t ask her how she ’ s getting back. That ’ s her problem. 
 
 I just take the payment ( thank you, US government ), hook her up, tell her to hold her breath, and blast her through space/time to the coordinates she gives me. 
 
 For the first time in our long rivalry, I hope she succeeds. 
 
 Because if she doesn ’ t this money won ’ t be worth the paper it ’ s printed on. 

