[ WP ] The first diary entry of a person who has been accidentally forgotten and left on Earth when everyone else has ascended to a higher plane .

Well... fuck. I should have listened. I should have believed the warnings. I was so fucking stupid. I was so wrapped up in my day-to-day bullshit, that I did n't realize that there may, ACTUALLY be something bigger in this universe than just my god damn problems. Am I really so stupid to have believed that something like this could n't eventually happen? 
 
 I know I'm a drunk, and I've missed out on a lot of things in my life because of it. But seriously, how in the actual FUCK could I have missed an entire PLANETARY EVACUATION?! Granted, there was n't anyone that liked me, but seriously, someone could n't have knocked on my fucking door or something? Was I really that big of an asshole all the time? 
 
 Things were messed up in my life. I felt alone when I knew that I was only the 4th person in history to ever go through what I went through, and that no one could truely understand what was happening, but that was almost 20 years ago. I thought I got over it. I'm 32. I'm a grown-ass man! Jesus Christ, I could n't get a fucking handle on this shit?! Now I will know the true meaning of being ALONE. Far worse than any other human has ever had to experience. Fuck. FUUUUCK! 
 
 The smog really did n't bother me. I mean, I got used to it, ya know? I got sick just like everyone else when it first broke out. But that was over 9 years ago. I did n't actually think this could get any worse. I thought this WAS the worst. I should have listened to her. 
 
 The only person on this god-forsaken rock that actually gave a shit about me, I managed to piss off enough to the point where she was willing to abandon me when I needed her the most, and I do n't blame here one bit. Maybe if I did n't say such awful things to her last night, she would have come to make sure I got on the shuttle this morning. But it was n't her responsibility. She was the only one that understood why I chose to live my life like this. She knew that someone like me, no family, no friends, a shit job, on top of what happened 20 years ago... she understood the only thing that I had was booze. But I did n't realize until just now that I had her. I had her, and I managed to drink that away as well. Probably the best thing that has ever happened to me. 
 
 I do n't know who the hell I'm talking to right now, and I feel like a god damn psychopath, and I know I'm just rambling on, not making much sense, but writing this is... almost cathartic. I'm pissed. I'm angry. And I can barely keep the god damn pen in my hand I'm shaking so hard. I do n't know if it's because I'm so beside myself right now, or if I'm due for my morning dose of self-depricating medication. 
 
 I know no one is ever going to read this, because there is n't anyone on this fucking planet TO read this - Jesus, that sounds insane to say - but maybe putting what I have to say in writing can some how make this all okay. I wanted to be a better man. I wanted to be the man SHE wanted and knew I could be. I could've put the glass down, dumped the booze, and moved on from my life. Leave the past in the past, where it should be... left to die, and to fucking stay dead. I would've been that man. Eventually. But now, not a single human being will know who I could've been. Not even me. I do n't know what I'll do now. I do n't know how long I'll survive fending for myself. But if, somehow, you read this, I just wanted to say, `` Thank you.'' You made my shitty existence mean something. I do n't know what it was, but I felt it. 
 
 Anyways, I guess the only thing I really can do now is to pour myself another drink.....
