[ TT ] You are an engineer responsible for maintaining your ship 's ion-propulsion drive . The problem is , you 're a car mechanic . You have no clue how elecrostatic ion thrusters work .

I wasn ’ t ready for this. The pitch black outside the window was split with a bright streak. 
 “ There goes the moon. ” Said Skylar, our fearless captain. 
 
 The engines started their high pitched whine much like the sound of an Audi supercharger getting up to full power. 
 “ First pulse in 2 minutes. Take your places. ” She bellowed, effortlessly floating back towards the front of the ship. Skylar even moved like she was meant to be in zero gravity. 
 
 I took my seat near the massive chrome engines. I had no idea what half of these gauges were supposed to mean but at least they were all in the green. My wife had filled out the application for me, she must have exaggerated quite a few things. I probably should have looked it over before I let her submit it but she insisted that I deserved better than fixing up cars from 100 years ago. Maybe she was right but I didn ’ t care about the money. Nothing could compare to the thrill of driving a fully rebuilt Honda Prelude down the interstate weaving in between the perfect spacing of the self-driving cars. The odd looks from pedestrians as roared down the street in a 1967 Chevy Impala. The raw power, the complete control, the purr of a muscle car, the whine of a tuned import. These new 2092 Google Transcubes just lacked any real personality and they just drove themselves. I wasn ’ t much of a programmer anyway. 
 
 zzzz*ZZZZ* **BANG** 
 
 The burst of the ion drive kicked me out of my day dream. My eyes closed and I did my best to retain consciousness. Through my barely open eyes I could make out Mars screeching past the window. My god, how fast are we going? 
 
 *sSssSsSsss* 
 
 A perfectly polished chrome exhaust tube started a slow but unsettling leak near my feat. I grabbed the black duct tape from my pack, one of the few personal items I had chosen to bring along. The tape held tight and the hissing subsided. 
 
 “ Everything okay back there? ” The captain ’ s voice came directly into my helmet. 
 
 “ Yup, we ’ re in the green ” Technically true I suppose, none of the gauges had moved much. 
 “ Prepare for pulse two in 90 seconds. ” 
 
 I could feel the hum of the huge engine warming up. It sounded just like the 2039 Ford Mustang, their first and only attempt at an electric engine in the American classic. 
 
 **POP**^**POP**^**POP**^**POP** 
 
 The deafening sounds hit and came with equally blinding light. The smell of burning plastic and a putrid white smoke started to fill my small engine compartment. 
 
 “ What the hell was that?! ” Screamed Skylar. 
 
 This is why I shouldn ’ t be here. I can ’ t fix these stupid ion engines. I pulled the release latches on the front of the ion drive. The previously pristine engine was now a mess of charged wires and smoldering circuit boards. 
 
 “ We ’ ve blown an engine captain. ” I calmly replied, not really sure of how screwed our lonely craft would be. 
 
 “ AN ENGINE? THE ENGINE? That ’ s the only propulsion this craft has! ” Her voice was wavering, her commanding demeanor was dissolving. “ Alphred what does our trajectory look like? ” 
 
 “ Not good captain. We are currently in a crash course with Jupiter. ” 
 
 My heart sank. 
 
 “ But with a small boost we could slingshot around the planted and head back toward Earth. ” 
 
 Skylar let out a long exhale and replied with her determination regained. “ Does that engine have enough left in her to give us a push? ” 
 
 I looked at the smoldering mess. There was no way any of this was going to work. These poor people were going to die because they brought along a phony mechanic. I was going to die. What do I even tell them? 
 
 My gaze darted toward the back of the ship looking for anything. Spacesuits, crew beds, toilet, garbage hatch. Wait. Maybe we could get a small boost. 
 
 “ I ’ m gon na try something captain. Hold tight ” 
 
 I rushed to collect the still smoldering wires from the wrecked engine. Opening the interior of the garbage air lock I gently placed them inside. Now to find something flammable. The bed sheets, the clothing even our dinner napkins were all flame retardant. But Skylar ’ s teddy bear lay just on her bunk. Hopefully this little guy wasn ’ t space safe. I put him on the charred wiring and slowed breathed life into the small fire. 
 
 “ ALERT. FIRE. ALERT. FIRE ” 
 
 The ships safety system did not seem pleased with my plan. 
 
 “ What ’ s going on back there? ” The voices in my ear peace seemed almost distant. 
 
 “ Just trust me. I ’ m a mechanic. ” 
 
 I cut the glove off the nearby space suit and grabbed its oxygen tank. This is either genius or we ’ re all going to die. I removed the tube from the top of the tank and grabbed my trusty roll of duct tape. I sealed the top of the tank with the detached glove and turn the valve on the tank slowly. The glove started inflating and seemed to be holding air tight. I threw my haphazard contraption into the now small fire in the garbage chute. I slammed closed the internal air lock and prayed the fire wouldn ’ t be completely smothered by the vacuum of space before it melted through the glove. 
 
 “ Blow garbage chute ” I hoped that was something this ship could actually do. 
 
 “ You want me to release the garbage without depressurizing the chute? We could damage the exterior. ” 
 
 “ BLOW THE DAMN CHUTE ” 
 
 I heard the hinges pop on the exterior of the ship. 
 
 And silence. Did the fire go out? 
 
 # BAAAAAAANG 
 
 An explosion rocked the ship and my head bounced off the metal framing as the ship lurched forward. It worked. It actually worked. 
 
 “ Captain, it looks like we go the thrust we needed to orbit Jupitar. ” Alphreds words were the sweetest sound. 
 
 Skylar ’ s screaking was less composed. “ Was there a BOMB in my garbage chute? ” 
 
 “ I call that internal combustion captain. “ 

