[ CC ] Wrote this for a prompt that never got attention ! Would love some merciless feedback and a dash of praise .

*Disclaimer: I am by no means an English/writing major, but I like your story and would like to answer your three questions and tell you why I like it* 
 
 > If this were to be a single scene in a larger piece, does it feel too long or too short? 
 
 Depends on the piece. If the piece is about Julia and Ron its probably too short. If its about something else it depends on context. 
 
 > Did I fuck up the tense? I changed from present to past after writing it, pretty sure I caught them all. 
 
 I did n't notice anything wrong with tense. 
 
 > Was there enough hints of the sci-fi elements to convince you of the universe without distracting from the plot? 
 
 Yes. 
 
 I really like how this story is presented. In the first paragraph, there was one sentence ``... bury the very thing that kept them apart as parents remember stories from Earth Elders...'' that I had difficulty understanding initially since my first interpretation while halfway through the sentence was that the dead lovers were the parents instead of their parents remembering the stories. It made sense the second time I read it though. 
 
 Throughout the rest of the story, I like how you use red and blue. Its clever how red is Mars and blue is Earth, since red/blue are frequently used to show opposing sides. Also, I really like the line `` quit loving the Earth and love me instead!'' The journal bot is pretty cool too. 
 
 Plot-wise, the story seems like this is incomplete because the beginning states that the lovers are dead, but this ends without us knowing how that happens. This is n't too much of a problem to me since it seems clear this is supposed to be the beginning of a larger work instead of a complete short story. Overall it is coherent, enjoyable ( by me at least ), thanks for sharing!
