[ WP ] The cure for death is found . But die to the fear of overpopulation on earth , people are given a choice . Stay on earth and be mortal , or be cured and go on a deep space mission .

**Part 1** 
 
 It was one of those historic moments that people remember for decades. One of 
 those moments which makes people remember where they have been when it happened. 
 
 I sat in a Starbuck's and tried to crack the WiFi password of the accounting 
 firm in the office above me. Not that I wanted to sniff around their client 
 database. I merely needed their access to NYSE. I was n't in for the money of 
 that either. I needed their secure access to various government servers. 
 
 While my laptop happily correlated the long string of zeros and ones coming 
 from the WiFi with those of cat videos, I sipped on an incredibly expensive 
 and incredibly mediocre latte. The telly ran CNN instead of the BBC. My 
 patriotism was hurt. 
 
 I pretended to write an email when the banner on the bigger screen announced a 
 press conference of the Minister of Public Health of Palunesia. Never heard of the 
 place before, like almost everybody. The internet told me their major export 
 was opium and slave workers. Their best trading partner for both was the 
 middle east. 
 
 The long-named -- and horse-faced -- Minister explained the waiting 
 journalists that a cure for death had been found and the principal 
 investigator, Dr Jaleel Baligarong, would explain the details right now. 
 
 I guess, we all remember how the video feed stopped and CNN went back to 
 reporting on some riots in South America. The barista switched channels after 
 the crowd in the cafe threaded to reenact these riots right here, right now. 
 The BBC broadcast went on for a few minutes longer, before being cut off as 
 well. 
 
 Later that day, CNN, the BBC, Reuters, and any other major news source 
 published an apology that they have been duped by a bunch of Palunesian 
 pranksters. The Palunesian Prime Minister made an appearance and denied 
 everything short of the Kennedy assassination. News reporting reverted quickly 
 to normal levels. 
 
 For someone in my business, these are indicators of a government cover-up. My 
 usual fare were secret trade agreements, surveillance programmes, and other 
 evidence of undemocratic behaviour of the ruling elite. Brings more money than 
 pilfering nude selfies from the unsecured social media account of some wannabe 
 pop star. Better for the resume too. Should I mess up and get caught, I could 
 still flee to the Chilean embassy. Llama steak is supposedly quite tasty. 
 
 Anyway, I started to look around on the respective forums. A rumour here and 
 there indicated that more things than gorillas, guerillas, and putsches were 
 exported from the Palunesia rainforest. The Minister of Public Health had been 
 found to be not so healthy after all. Hard to be healthy when you drown 
 trapped in your own yacht. 
 
 I checked my various sources for unsecured confidential information: the 
 servers of the DMV, Homeland Security, NTSB, Scotland Yard, and the American 
 Dental Association. Nothing. There was even more info on Bigfoot than on Dr 
 Baligarong. 
 
 That changed when I checked a deep-web shop. I came to sell a few selfies that 
 had made their way onto my harddrive, but stayed for the immortality. Some 
 dude with lots of karma points sold Baligarong's drug. Take two pills a day 
 for a week and you're set. One hundred million US dollars in an escrow 
 account and the rest of time is yours. 
 
 Getting the money is easy when you're pretty, sing like an angel, or dance 
 like Fred Astaire reincarnated. For guys like me, it's not that easy. If I had 
 the money, I would retire on the same island as the escrow account and sip Mai 
 Tais instead of lattes. 
 
 There is no such thing as'impossible' for a man on a mission. I researched 
 anything that brought me closer to this specific conspiracy. After six months 
 of hard work, I discovered that the tonnage of Pemkahang fruits exported from 
 Palunesia closely correlated with the number of transactions to a certain bank 
 specialized in escrow accounts. 
 
 Pemkahang fruits are the size of a small orange, have a shell like a coconut, 
 and taste like gorilla feces, if the internet is to be believed. Yet, they 
 have suddenly become en vogue with the rich people. You can store them in a hot, 
 wet climate for almost forever ( Bacteria and fungi do n't like their taste 
 either, goes an in-joke of biologists researching Pemkahang. ), yet they are 
 shipped from Palunesia in individually cooled, strongbox-like containers. 
 
 Following a box around the world is surprisingly easy. If you know the 
 shipping number. And have unlimited access to various customs agency 
 worldwide. I selected handful of Pemkahang boxes at random and let the servers 
 of the Colorado Department of Corrections do the work. I made it send me a 
 text message whenever the shipping number appeared somewhere. 
 
 *Three months later* 
 
 A few of my boxes had been shipped to San Francisco and one was now en-route to a 
 place called Fruitvale. It was delivered to an estate in the possession of a 
 movie actress. She'died' later that week'of a overdose'. 
 
 A pretty well-known entrepreneur in the social media craze received another 
 box. Dead as a dodo one week later:'Skydiving accident'. 
 
 A formerly famous front man of a boy band wrapped his Porsche around a tree, 
 six days after he received a shipment from Palunesia. 
 
'Death metal drummer dies in deadly blaze on his dairy farm', said The Sun. 
'Did he deal with the devil?' 
 
 Nope. Dealt with Palunesia. And used a bank with sloppy security. Actually, the 
 local dentist had sloppy security that allowed me to use his account to hack 
 into the bank, but that does n't matter. What mattered was that the dead 
 drummer deposited dough, three days before the box left Palunesia. 
 
 I walked around in my basement office to think about it. Evidently, these 
 people paid their price for immortality under the condition to disappear. Made 
 sense to me. I would n't want the masses ( or the American Government for that 
 matter ) to find out that I sold eternal life. Countries have been overrun for 
 less. 
 
 The question was: How do I get my share without paying? 
 
 My answer was the same as to every question: Information wants to be free. Pay 
 up or I'll ensure that. Like any good blackmailing, this required preparation 
 and an insurance policy. 
 
 I compiled the info in a file and placed it on a deep-web escrow account of my 
 own. The price: One box of Pemkahang. 
 
 Part II below
