[ WP ] Write a murder from the perspective of a cheerful inanimate object

AH, another fantastic day of absolutely nothing! I've been here for as long as I care to remember, time does n't hold much sway with me as I never age, which is just fantastic is n't it?! The average day consists of me watching the sunrise with my buddies, they do n't say much and neither do I, we're all men of few woods and even less action I suppose you could say! After that, I'll check up on my human friends who live under me ( they still use internet explorer ), but they never say anything more than some gibberish that I ca n't understand. Oh well! Anyway, what was I talking about.... OH YEAH! I was telling you all about the move! They way I got here was rather odd, I was sitting around doing my normal rock things, when suddenly; two guys ( that's you ) with big shiny things came running down the hill! You started to bang the shiny things together, and said some mean things to each other ( you guys were probably just playing! ). Eventually, you got tired and dropped the shiny thing, then your buddy decided to introduce me to you, and here I am, in this dark squishy place. The other guys left a while ago, but I guess you'll stick around! I have so much to tell you new friend! Where to start! We have so much time together!
