[ WP ] : Due to advances in medical science , the standard human life expectancy is now around 120-140 . It is discovered that people in their 100-teens go through a second edgy rebellious phase .

We used to call it `` Alzheimer's Disease.'' Now we just call it being a `` Double Teen Douche.'' 
 
 Pretending your kids are n't yours, forgetting to take medication, denying the transformative years of your life. These are all symptoms of a one hundred and thirteen year old punk ass teenager. Clueless. Their acts were on point. 
 
 You see, at first we just accepted the fact that at a certain age people start to lose cognitive function. Then our top behavioral scientists within our organization started to privately monitor these old demented hoodlums when they thought they were in solitude. 
 
 Excessive gaming, vandalism, substance abuse and a new type of dance known as the muffin hump were some activities these old timer rebels participated in. They were out of control with no regards for the law, muffin humping and blind to the fact that they need to slow down. 
 
 It did n't matter to most of them. This was their last parade before their departure into the unknown. For some, their conciousness would be uploaded into the central supercomputer framework, others would have their brains connected to shuttles to explore the universe. 
 
 At least for now we will let them pretend. Let them ignore responsibilities. Damn old people. Get off my lawn and quit being little shits. 

