[ WP ] The Fountain of Youth is discovered in Florida and then quickly turned into a tourist trap .

Tired of wasting your hard earned money on expensive creams and serums that don ’ t work? 
 
 Tired of trying to keep up with that twenty-something at your husband ’ s office? 
 
 Tired of being tired? 
 
 Come on down to Age Away Spa and Retreat! The only spa guaranteed to take those pesky years away! 
 
 Stretch marks? See you later! 
 
 Crows feet? Watch them fade! 
 
 Menopause? Get that flow back in your life, you ’ ll practically feel your eggs regenerating! 
 
 
 Now for only $ 19.99 you can get ONE VIAL of water from the FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH! 
 
 AND THAT ’ S NOT ALL! 
 
 We ’ ll also throw in some cute his and hers face masks made from that magic elixir! 
 
 Now you can join the hustle and bustle of crowds at the public side of the Fountain, but at Age Away Spa and Retreat you can enjoy the feeling of regained youth in the privacy of your own imitation log cabin, relax by the pool, get a massage from our world-renowned therapists, and drink champagne as your liver forgets what a hangover is. All for only $ 999.99 for one night ’ s stay, breakfast not included. 

