[ WP ] An action hero who has run out of gum , is confused on what to do next when a henchman offers him a piece .

`` I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and I'm all out of bubblegum.'' said the manly action hero with the sweet pompadour. 
 
 `` Here ya go'' said his cute sidekick. `` It's watermelon flavored.'' 
 
 `` Oh thanks, I do n't actually chew bubblegum though. Aspartame is horrible for you.'' 
 
 `` Yeah whatever, you conspiracy theorist. You probably think vaccines are bad for you too.'' said the not-so-cute-anymore sidekick rather snidely. `` Maybe you should come up with a better punchline instead of ripping off some cheesy 80's movie.'' 
 
 `` You take that back!'' shouted the heroic manly man. `` That film was a masterpiece, you codswallop!'' 
 
 -- - 
 
 The action hero and the sidekick's relationship never recovered after that fateful day. The sidekick went off to who knows where. He's probably not doing anything heroic or manly. Whereas the heroic action man writes stories on web forums nowadays. He's a great writer. You should totally check him out sometime.
