[ WP ] You are the first person in your species of bugs that has survived a close encounter with a bug zapper .

( Note: I wrote this imagining a bug zapper as an electric racket you swing around to smack bugs, only just realised this is not what most bug zappers look like... ) 
 
 From afar, the yawn of a cupboard thrown open, then the clang of cheap plastic and the supersonic twang of metal wires. I scuttled along, the din of everyday life only too quotidian. Moments later, there came the sound of cardboard being torn, the crinkle of plastic as batteries were forced out from their packaging, then the echo of batteries bouncing off springs. 
 
 It was not until I heard the lightsabre-whoosh of electricity that I paused, scanning my kaleidoscopic world of fractured images for the source of that sound. A dry cackle filled the tense silence. 
 
 Then out of nowhere, a rush of air flattened the hairs of my legs. I darted forward, frantically making for the darkness of the sofa. 
 
 I had barely moved a few centimetres when a dreadful crash deafened me. My legs gave way and I pressed myself into the cold marble floor. As the ringing around my ears subsidised, I became aware of a metal grille pressed just above me, the lick of electricity hot and sweaty on its cruel lips. Nursing an awful feeling of dread, I kept motionless. 
 
 A sudden twist of the metal grille above me jolted my nerves, and I instinctively darted forward, no destination in mind. 
 
 It was a mistake. 
 
 An incredibly loud explosion came from within my body, and my nerves were lit on fire. I surged forward madly, the world a whirling mess. It was only until I found myself under a dark sofa that I realised that the metal grilles above me must have had been lifted, if only for a moment. 
 
 The subsequent hours flashed by in a daze. I vaguely remember being pushed along furtively by a few other bugs, but when I regained consciousness, I was already in the hive learning centre. Wordlessly, an intimidating helmet was lowered upon my head, and I felt my memories palpitating, almost painfully. Finally, the helmet was released, leaving me free to slither out of the room. 
 
 Outside, along the corridor, the bulletin screen flashed momentarily, then reanimated with a new Mandatory Collective Intelligence Update ( MCIU ) - `` Advisory Against the Development of Electric Weaponry in Sector 11A''. A gantry fell over the corridor, and a pair of antennae slid out from the side of the wall. To get past the gantry, everyone had to connect with the pair of antennae, downloading the advisory. 
 
 It gave me no small pleasure to know that soon, my fellow bugs would be all too familiar with the warning sounds of electric weaponry.
