[ WP ] Congratulations ! You 've finally landed your dream job . Describe your horror upon realizing how much you hate it .

Could it be true? I thought I had made up the position when I wrote in to Victoria's Secret but the lettering on my business car read: OFFICIAL VICTORIA'S SECRET BOOTY OILER/DEMOLITION EXPERT/PUPPY HANDLER. At least three of those words were made up but the first paycheck had already come in. The zeros literally wrapped around the page they were printed on. I did n't cry when Mufasa died but I'll cry now. Tears of joy. 
 
 That was three weeks ago and the tear had turned into real ones. How did a job suck this hard? Booty oiler had lost its appeal when the incessant bitching had started, `` Left, right, up down, no not like that!''. The day I found out I suck at giving massages to hot ladies was the day they told me I would be taking a 50 % pay cut. The dream was dead. Supermodels do n't talk to guys like me, let alone sleep with them. On top of that every third was a dude. Oh yeah, dogs shit a lot and what the FUCK needs to be demolished in a fashion show? 

