[ PI ] The Delicate Wasteland of the Brain - FEB CONTEST

Really cool concept, and quite gripping throughout. I did feel a little disoriented at times, but I suppose that was kind of the point. 
 
 I liked Hana as the protagonist, but sometimes struggled to understand her motivation. For example, I get that she loves Mary, but outside of being told that Mary is very hard not to love, I never saw much in Mary that made me realise why Hana cared about her so much. A bit more show and less tell, in general, would've helped the whole story, I think. 
 
 That said, I was captivated and fascinated for most of it, and was really intrigued to see where it was all going. The surreal and shifting settings were easy to visualise, and Hana's growing loneliness and frustration was quite palpable. 
 
 Some people have pointed out typos but I did n't notice any, and I thought the narrative flowed along smoothly. 
 
 Thanks for sharing this, it was a unique and enjoyable read.
