[ WP ] Humans make contact with aliens only to discover that all galactic civilisations use magic instead of technology who do n't believe us when we say we do n't use magic

We had expected the aliens to be technologically advanced. I mean, how could n't we? Our scientists said that there was no other way of traveling interstellar distances other than a warp drive. 
 
 They were wrong, very wrong. 
 
 These aliens used magic, fucking magic. And none of the stupid tricks. Real. Magic. 
 
 `` So you guys do n't use technology at all?'' I asked, as I paced around the room, in a attempt to calm myself down. 
 
 `` We use some technology, you know, cameras and stuff, but why get an automobile when you can just teleport?'' replied the Alien as he ate what looked like a purple fry. 
 
 `` Because... I do n't know... technology just seems so much more... alien-like.'' 
 
 `` Just like any race, we use magic.'' said the Alien, he seemed pleased with his answer until he saw the look on my face. `` Wait, you guys do n't use Magic?'' 
 
 `` No but we used to, it's a lost art ya know? Like -'' 
 
 I was cut off by the alien ambassador who, shocked, interrupted me. 
 
 `` How do you live without Magic? Without magic planets die, their atmospheres burn away!'' 
 
 `` That does n't make any sense!'' 
 
 `` It does n't?! Look at Mars? Explain Mars!'' 
 
 `` Well I may not know what happened to Mars's atmosphere but-'' 
 
 `` Your race will be doomed to extinction if you do n't adopt Magic again!'' 
 
 `` FINE! We'll use magic'' 
 
 `` We will open a school on your planet to teach you Magic.'' 
 
 `` Sounds good to me. But what are you gon na call it? Hogwarts?'' I said jokingly 
 
 `` I thought you said you do n't use magic, how did you read my mind'' 
 
 `` Wait, I did n't read your mind, that does n't, wait... is J.K Rowling an alien?'' 
 
 `` Yep.'' 
 
 `` Oh... are all famous writers aliens?'' 
 
 `` Yep'' 
 
 `` Alright then...''
