[ FF ] A man has twenty minutes to live and what he wants most is a cigarette

I think back to when I was in high school; Jenny wanted to go out to lunch and grab a bite to eat, the burger joint was only a quarter of a mile off the campus. I denied her, feeding the habit I'd gained over the years. 
 
 I think back to when my younger brother was learning to walk, I was only thirteen and my friends showed me how to be cool. I missed seeing his first steps of life. 
 
 I think back to working on the oil rig with my father, and standing thousands of feet above the sea. I remember seeing his best friends wrinkled face as tears streamed down it. I could have been there to keep him from falling, but I had to fill my addiction. 
 
 I think back to now, how I could have saved every moment I've been killing myself, eating my insides with the black tar... 
 
 And in these twenty minutes, the only thing that will kill the pain is what I want most. Just. One. Cigarette. 
 
 I remember him telling me it was unlike a man to smoke at a funeral, and the rain only drenches my pain through my skin.
