[ WP ] You die and God announces that you 're going to Hell . You 're shocked and confused because you were a devout Evangelical Christian your entire life .

`` What the fuck is going on, I was a devout Christfag my whole life and now I'm in Hell? This is fucking bullshit, I never had pre-marital sex or watched gay pr0nz once! Explain thyslef'' said Dead Me 
 
 `` You're 1/8th Jewish, it was kept a family secret'' said God 
 
 `` Wh-What?'' I muttered 
 
 `` Yes that's right, *No Jews*'' replied the Big Man 
 
 `` B-b-but Jizzus said all people were welcome in the kingdom of seven eleven'' I uttered 
 
 `` Yea, *people*'' loled God 
 
 `` Oh... well wtf do I do then? I never even had a chance'' I retorted 
 
 `` Exactly'' he blurped 
 
 `` What do you mean?'' I said 
 
 `` Exactly'' he repeated 
 
 `` Huh?'' I said again 
 
 `` Ca n't toast the ghost'' he gurped 
 
 `` Wh-What?'' I said, feeling rather sad 
 
 `` You were just a battery for die Manner aryanisch, deal wid it'' he roflmaod 
 
 `` B-b-but..'' I whimpered 
 
 `` Joo is kill'' he krababbled 
 
 `` No''
