[ WP ] Write the letter that you always wanted to , but never did .

Dear Mariana, this may not be your number anymore but I do n't care I had to get this out. When you and I started are little `` relationship'' I guess you could call it that, it was really pretty small in hindsight but that does n't matter. What does is that when we were talking I was in the biggest and most challenging part of my life. Not with you but with personal things, literally everything had changed and I honestly think that you helped me deal with it better then anything else ever could. But I'll be honest when you said we should breakup, I was scared because I thought we were n't going to talk anymore and that's what I needed then. I'm not trying to make you feel guilty or anything it's just that without talking to you I actually did get a little crazy and I have n't ever changed back. Now I'm stressed out or numb, I have n't really loved anything in a while, but I used to love my music and you and meeting new people and having relationships. But now it's become just me trying to reach for something perfect, but that I know wo n't happen. I do n't know why I changed like that and frankly its something I do n't like to think about. It used to be different but it changed and I want to be back the same way, I'll see you this summer and I hope that'll you see me and ask me. 
 This was the love of my life and my best friend. I've seen her a couple times since then but it's never been enough for us to be close again
