[ WP ] Humans have discovered the secret to high-speed inter-planetary travel . and it is the most stupid and ridicilous thing possible

`` Clancy!'' 
 
 `` Yes dear?'' 
 
 `` Power's down to 5 %, check the core?'' 
 
 `` Yes, dear.'' 
 
 Clancy checked and double-checked the monitors, then sighed a reluctant sigh. He slowly put on his encounter suit and began the long climb down into the ship's innards, past the quantum foam engines and into the primary power core's airlock. 
 
 One by one, Clancy checked the important systems. Notepads, check. Whiteboard markers, check. Donuts. Wait. Clancy tapped his earpiece. 
 
 `` Martha!'' 
 
 `` Yeah?'' 
 
 `` We're out of sprinkles.'' 
 
 `` Check under the coffee filters.'' 
 
 Sure enough, there was the 30 kilo bag of sprinkles. Without power, he would have to lift the bag himself and pour it into the hopper. Clancy knew he had to be careful; too much stupidity just outside the containment field could cause a short, and he had already forgotten where the sprinkles were kept. 
 
 Clancy carefully ticked off each item on the checklist. Graceful shutdown. Reload consumables ( lift with your legs! ). Recalibrate agenda. Execute call to order. 
 
 He peered into the core's narrow observation window, nervous even with the fully insulated suit. He could see the simulated attendees seated around the faux wood conference table, donuts and coffee in hand, gradually ending their idle chitchat as the moderator unit called for attention. 
 
 `` Okay, let's get started. Gary, what's your status?'' 
 
 `` I'm still waiting on Bob's numbers before I can do the quarterly reports.'' 
 
 `` You know I ca n't run the numbers until I get Alice's updated inventory codes.'' 
 
 `` But those codes are for the upcoming quarter, the numbers were need are for last quarter.'' 
 
 Clancy backed away, satisfied that power would be returning to nominal levels soon. Harnessing human stupidity had never been practical until the idea to use status meetings as a catalyst.
