[ WP ] Your dad 's dead body is being lowered into a grave across town . Most people understand why you are n't there , but they are wrong .

So my dad died. This is quite awkward, but not because I am on Mars as the pastor said in the sermon. 
 
 Twenty years ago I found an old book in an antique shop in the old town of Sherford, England. It was about a man who was left behind on Mars back when it was uninhabited. I do n't quite remember his name but I do remember he was quite a character. I liked the book because I recognized myself in it a bit. 
 
 I fantasised about seeing the dunes and craters in real life. I would build my own dome on the outskirts of civilization. Not too far from a big town, but definitely not in a week's reach of a launch platform. 
 
 When my mother died a few years ago I decided that I would take the leap of faith and I signed up for a one way trip through commercial spaceliner *Nguyen - Wang*. To get used to the long times in space transit I would do all my preparation shopping on Moon. I was going to need to get used to traveling long distances anyway, and Moon - of course - has the advantage of not having sales tax. 
 
 I would build a presure tent in my father's backyard and I slept in it through the fall. I would practice EVA's while shopping for groceries. Training with the suit is important because you really do n't want to make mistakes when you are on the surface of mars. The hotter summers of the past decades made climate controlled suits more popular anyway so I did n't quite look like an ass with my helmet and suit on. I probably did look like an ass but it took me so long to convince myself to do public EVA's I'm never going to admit to it. 
 
 I did everything one does when prepping for'the big move' so in my little home town I was soon known as that *Mars dude*. In fact, I did so much prepping that when I finally received that big yellow envelope I was too embarrassed admit its contents. 
 
 The yellow envelope was in itself quite a strange occurrence. A man in *Nguyen -Wang* attire personally handed it to me. He even stayed at the local hotel for a night because I was out of town when he found my father home alone. When he came back the next day I opened the door excitedly because why would Nguyen - Wang personally hand me something?! And that something was wrapped in actual paper! If it was worth putting in paper it must be an important message. Surely, I had paid 34 million pound for the ticket, but a trip to Mars is very costly to begin with and the space liners were barely making a profit as is. 
 
 But what I did not know, and most people in my immediate circle do not know to this day, is that Nguyen - Wang treats customers who fail their LST exams very carefully. The letter said the following: 
 
 > Dear mr. C.T. Anghelescu, 
 > 
 > On behalf of the examination board of Nguyen - Wang, I hereby inform you that unfortunately we can not take you aboard our spaceships. 
 > 
 > Your medical examination score is: *45*, and your test performance score is: *36*. These scores are too low to be insured through any of the galaxy's insurance firms and will be valid for the following 10 years. 
 > 
 > Nguyen - Wang will fully refund your purchase and hope you the very best. 
 > 
 > Kind regards, 
 > 
 > Jimmy Gavin 
 
 Of course I was floored. But to make it worse, I had already told my father I was confirmed for the flight the day after I took the tests. I could n't admit I lied now, especially after he bad been bugging me for taking the studying too lightly. I maybe could have studied a little harder, but I thought I would ace it. 
 
 So on the day of my departure from Faro Intergalactic I only pretended to leave earth. I insisted my relatives to say goodbye to me before my flight to the republic of Iberia and Morocco and not travel with me to Faro. I would never be allowed through security as a non-traveler and that would reveal my lies. 
 
 Since I could not afford to move to Moon, I had no other option than to move to Antarctica. At least for the time being. There I would be able to take convincing footage to fool them into believing I was actually on Mars. 
 
 So here I am. Just a mere 4.5 hour flight from my dad's funeral, attended with people who think I am at least 8 months away at the far end of a developing planet. Rest in peace dad, I'm so sorry. 
 
 EDIT: It's probably a little rough but I rarely write these kinds of things and English is not my first language. 
 
 

