[ WP ] A world where everyone has a unique TV cliche applied to them , the main character has one of the most annoying ones . Every time he/she ends a sentence there is an audible record scratch sound .

'Would you like any whipped cream?' The barista asked me. 
 
 I shook my head and smiled. Two minutes of explain myself through hand signals and shakes and nods to get to this point and I'd given up on getting an Americano, settling for the hot chocolate she'd kept trying to push. Dumb blonde tropes were the worst, they never got things right or picked up on any hints. 
 
'Oops!' She exclaimed, spraying hot chocolate all over the place as she pushed the nozzle of the whipped cream deep into the cup. 
 
 I sighed and pointedly avoided looking at her as she rubbed the cream and chocolate over her t-shirt, blissfully ignorant of the stares and scoffs she drew from lecherous frat boy and conservative house wife tropes. 
 
'Never mind.' [ record scratch ] I said, turning away and walking out of the coffee shop before someone could start a unique twist. Another morning without coffee, and another glorious start to my day. 
 
'Coming through!' Shouted a voice, and I jumped aside, narrowly avoiding a skate punk careening through on his youthful adventure. 
 
'Watch where you're going,' [ record scratch ] I shouted. Grinning with gleeful malice as he careened off course and into a dumpster, flipping head over heel. 
 
'Serves you right.' [ record scratch ] I intoned. Turning as I said it and bumping into someone. 
 
 I looked down and saw a nerdy girl, cute, glassed, hair up, and frumpy clothes. Just dying for a makeover. I hurriedly rushed over to her to help her to her feet and gather up the inevitable multitude of books and pieces of paper that she had dropped. 
 
 I smiled at her as I handed the bundle back to her and she blushed sweetly. 
 
'I'm sorry,' she said.'It's just that my glasses get fogged up in the cold.' 
 
 It was n't cold enough for glasses to fog, but nerd-girls often denied real world physics. 
 
'Do n't worry about it,' [ record scratch ] I said, and her eyes went wide staring behind me. 
 
 I turned around just in time to see the truck smashing through the fire hydrant and coming right for me.
