[ OT ] Sunday Free Write : Happy Holidays Edition !

The First Christmas. 
 
 ( In a small home in the mid-east, a few years after year 0. Two brothers talk. ) 
 
 Ahab: Hey Merry Christmas Jed. 
 
 Jed: What? 
 
 Ahab: It ’ s Christmas, so merry Christmas. 
 
 Jed: Ah ok. What ’ s Christmas? 
 
 Ahab: The celebration of Jesus ’ birthday. 
 
 Jed: Cool. Who ’ s Jesus? 
 
 Ahab: Our lord and saviour. Also he ’ s the son of God. 
 
 Jed: Ok. Since when? 
 
 Ahab: Year zero. That ’ s why they re-set the calendar year to zero a few years back. 
 
 Jed: I was wondering why they did that whole reset thing since the earth is at least a few million years old. Anywho, how are we so sure he ’ s the son of God and all that? 
 
 Ahab: It ’ s in a book, silly. A book wouldn ’ t lie. Called the Bible. 
 
 Jed: Ah ok then. Jesus wrote it I ’ m guessing? 
 
 Ahab: Naw. He had twelve apostles who witnessed his death and resurrection. 
 
 Jed: Cool, so they wrote it then… 
 
 Ahab: Naw dog. About 40 dudes collaborated to write it. But it ’ s the word of God. Real talk. 
 
 Jed: I dig. So you read it yet? 
 
 Ahab: No, I can ’ t read. But I ’ m sure it ’ s all true. 40 dudes couldn ’ t be wrong. 
 
 Jed: I ’ m not sure how legit this all sounds. I ’ ve got some doubts about… 
 
 Ahab: Hold on fam, I ’ m taking the turkey out of the oven; the bell dinged. Can you cut the gas on the mashed potatoes and the stir the gravy please? 
 
 Jed: Hold up. Turkey? Gravy? Mash? What ’ s all this about? 
 
 Ahab: That ’ s how we celebrate the birth of Jesus. There ’ s a yule log on ice. It ’ s a type of ice-cream cake thingy. They just invented it. 
 
 Jed: Oh snap! Wait till I tell all the boys at work about this! 
 
 Ahab: Hold up fam. No work today, not on Christmas. Beside you need to open your Christmas presents tucked under the Christmas tree. 
 
 Jed: Hold up. Turkey, gravy, mash, ice-cream log, no work and free gifts?! 
 
 Ahab: Yeah bro. It ’ s Christmas... what do you say? 
 
 Jed: Homie, I say Merry fucking Christmas! 
 
 ( The End ) 
 
 

