[ WP ] Write about a bad trip

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, 
 
 Humpty Dumpty had a great fall; 
 
 All the king's horses and all the king's men 
 
 Could n't put Humpty together again- 
 
 Humpty sat there in agony. It had been a week since he'd fallen, walking on the wall. He worked for the king you see, the egg people have been known for their excellent eyesight since the dawn of man, and as thus, were often decreed to walk the castle walls. 
 
 Humpty did n't mind. It paid well, there was always food, wine, women. King Russrar was a good king, Humpty thought, he was fair and he was wise. Humpty enjoyed his position as a watcher of the wall. 
 
 The trade off, you see, was that there was always wine. Humpty Loved wine. Humpty was always taking a bottle or two with him to work. Nobody really cared. It was n't against the law to drink on the job, Humpty never got wasted or anything, in fact it was quite common to drink while on watch. 
 
 The trade off, you see, was the the egg people do not take to falling well. 
 
 Humpty watched the east wall for six and three quarter years, in another three and one quarter years he would have been made an egg lord. It was quite sad for Humpty and his family the da- 
 
 `` I do n't think we can help him-'' Said Drake. Looking down at his friend, Joe. 
 
 `` PUTTY PUTTY PUTTY PUTTY'' Joe exclaimed. Having a great time playing with the broken remains of a carton of eggs on the kitchen counter. 
 
 Ron nodded in disapproval. It's not like he and Drake were n't tripping, they were, but Joe always took too much. He knew that he should have stopped him from taking a full strip. It was too much. But ah `` At least he's not trying to cook the eggs'' he said. 
 
 Drake grew wide eyed as Joe turned on the stove and began cremating Humpty Dumpty, as his efforts to put him back together were in vain, he felt, as king, that such a loyal egg of the watch should have a proper funeral. 
 
 `` A FUNERAL FIT FOR AN EGG'' He shouted, flailing about as his clothes caught fire.
