[ WP ] Adventure time ! Start an adventure , replies continue the adventure .

Purgatory was an obsession for her. Ever since she was young she always contemplated the meaning of death. She had a very active imagination, and was always treated differently for it. She remembered her 4th grade teacher. He was a tool. All of them were tools, all of what seemed to interest them was trivial. Like they had chosen to ignore the inevitable, and pretend it did n't exist. He had contacted her mom to tell her about how'special' she was, and how he feared she would'harm' other students with her'unusual' conversations. Of course her mother did n't care.'Your dad is the reason we are miserable'.'He does n't love you'.'He left us behind to go marry a slut'. She knew she was different. Epicurus, was her idol.'Why should I fear death? If I am death is not, if death is I am not, why should I fear that which only exists when I do not?'. Religion offered her mind no consolation, it provided nothing. A way to revive denial, and mitigate the inevitable.'He died for all our sins'. Why would death be a negative implication for a deity? Religion feeds on guilt, it creates comfort by denying yourself freedom to act upon your inner inhibitions. You are happy that you are, without a doubt, sure of your interpretation of life and death. By shutting down your innate instincts, you are rewarded when you die. She knew the truth. All these pending questions were dormant by the fact that you acknowledged an idea. An idea you are so sure of. An idea you adopted without question when you were born. An idea established mainly due to geographical predispositions. Secretly they fear death, they fear that maybe their interpretation was not correct. She did n't fear death as a matter of fact she waited for it. She waited for it to come. An escape from the mundane, the redundant, the inevitable. An escape from the rational mind, and what little it had to offer in comparison to death. Life is the lie everyone loved, whereas death was the truth everyone hated. She was ostracized by her school peers growing up, but she did n't mind. In fact she reinforced this treatment, she remembered Fydor Dostoevsky's concept of self-lacerating love. She felt that by harming her social status, she would learn how to love herself. Her mind was an array of the ambivalent. Yes, she hated her life, but by hating her life she also loved herself. That's when she decided to explore purgatory. Thats when she decided to kill herself.
