[ EU ] James Bond , Jason Bourne , and Ethan Hunt are working together on a secret mission and everything is going to plan . That is , until Sterling Archer shows up .

The four spies waited at their ready points, scopes trained on the crowd ahead of the President, whose speech was rising in a crescendo. Intel said the strike would happen in just seconds. 
 
 M spoke: `` Bond?'' 
 
 `` Ready, ma'am.'' 
 
 `` Bourne?'' 
 
 `` God Bless America.'' 
 
 `` Hunt?'' 
 
 `` I'm clear.'' 
 
 M sighed. `` Proceed.'' 
 
 From their 3 rooftop hideouts there was the click of safeties turning off. 
 
 Then a whisper from above... 
 
 `` Wooohoooooooo!'' 
 
 A BASE jumper's chute billows open, slowing a skydiver mere feet above the President. 
 
 The 3 spies snap-fire at this new target. The shots tear through the skydiver's chute stays, and he crashes to Earth, chute streaming behind him. 
 
 Directly on top of the President of Micronesia. 
 
 At this moment an assassin in the crowd fires. The President's right arm is hit as Archer's impact pushes him to one side, then lands on his injured arm. 
 
 `` Aaaarrrgh'' says the President. 
 
 `` Aaaarrrcccheeerrr!'' says several other voices. 
 
 Archer stands up and dusts off his suit. The assassin fires again, this time hitting Archer's parachute harness ( again ) and causing it to fall off. 
 
 Archer pulls out a boquet of flowers and hands them to the President's daughter, stepping on the President several more times in the process. 
 
 `` Hey baby. Let's kick it.'' 
 
 Archer kicks the parachute harness at the assassin, causing it to wrap around the assassin's gun and head, subduing him, but not before the assassin fires one last time, shooting the President's other upper arm. 
 
 `` Arrrgghhh!'' says the President. 
 
 She smacks the flowers aside. `` You're an asshole!'' 
 
 `` Hey hey hey, are you a gastroenterologist? Because I do n't think you're medically qualified to say that.'' 
 
 `` I'm...'' 
 
 ``... but that's OK, let's get you that degree frame you always wanted. And bang in some shitty gift shop.'' 
 
 `` Well...'' 
 
 Archer grabs her and uses a gas-powered grappling hook to drag himself and her sideways off the podium, bouncing across the President yet again. 
 
 `` Aaarrrgghh'' says the president. 
 
 `` Arrrchhheerrr!'' says several other voices.
