[ WP ] “ I want you to see me for what I really am. ” The strange use of “ what ” scared me .

`` Is this...'' I said slowly, `` *that* kind of conversation?'' 
 
 She nodded. `` It is.'' 
 
 `` That kind of... spooky... Outer Limits, Twilight Zone, Tales from the Crypt -'' 
 
 She nodded. 
 
 `` - Perversions of Science, Tales from the Darkside -'' 
 
 `` Yes,'' she said. `` Yes. Fuck, you watch a lot of crap.'' 
 
 I sunk my head a little in shame. `` I was n't even finished,'' I said. `` So what's the... deal... you know?'' 
 
 `` My,'' she sighed, `` *appearance* is based on a projection I put forward to people. It makes them to see me the way I want to be seen. Not how I... am.'' 
 
 I held her hand. `` Whatever it is, I said, whatever Masters of Horror thing -'' 
 
 `` - Stop it.'' 
 
 `` - it is, we'll deal with it together. I love you. You know that, do n't you?'' 
 
 A single tear rolled down what I hoped would actually turn out to be a cheek. Or at the very least, cheek like. I really did love her. I'd settle for anything cheek-adjacent. `` I do,'' she said. `` I do n't know if it's enough.'' 
 
 `` Talons, spikes, horns. It's all the same to me. Let's do this.'' 
 
 She nodded. 
 
 I fixed my expression. Whatever it was, I was resolved not to move a muscle. 
 
 She changed. 
 
 Fixed. Fixed. Fixed. Fixed expression. Not moving a fucking muscle. I'm a statue. I'm a goddamn *statue. * I can do this. The man of stone. That is *me. * I'm a fucking - 
 
 `` Eddie?'' She gurgled. 
 
 `` Yes?'' I said, without moving my jaws. 
 
 `` Are you OK?'' 
 
 `` Yes?'' I said. `` Of course. You're still you. Why would n't I be OK?'' 
 
 She sobbed. `` Because you're grinning like a corpse. And your eyes are so wide it looks like they do n't have lids any more. And you're kind of whimpering a bit. Are you in shock?'' 
 
 Whimpering? Shit! I fixated on not moving so much I - 
 
 `` Eddie?'' 
 
 `` I'm fine,'' I said. `` I'm... it's just... I thought... I was hoping... not *hoping*, obviously. No expectations. No preconceptions. I guess an ideal... not that you're not ideal. You're ideal as shit. You're an idea of ideal. Ideally. It's just... I guess if I was... if I had to pin down a specific *episode* of the Twilight Zone, I'd hope - not hope, hope's the wrong word - I would... I guess it would be - you know what? Based on *my* body type, and the ideal... no not'ideal' body type. That came out wrong. Based on my body type and the optimal body type of the recipient... of... my... love... I would... have...'' I ground to a halt. Thank Christ. 
 
 `` What?'' She asked. 
 
 I closed my eyes. `` It's a bit more gelatinous than I was expecting.'' 
 
 `` I knew it! I knew it! I knew you could n't love me like this!'' 
 
 `` I do,'' I lied. Total lie. It had already gone. Lying, I said, `` I do love you. I'm just... surprised.'' 
 
 She sobbed, quivering like Jell-O. `` You'd love me if I was some kind of sexy vampire!'' 
 
 Oh, shit that would be fucking sweet. What was I going to do? 
 
 `` I've been cheating on you,'' I said. `` I'm sorry. You should know. Now we're being honest.'' 
 
 `` Who was it?'' She shouted. `` Who was it? Was it that girl from the checkout? I'll fucking absorb that bitch!'' 
 
 I closed my eyes and prayed for death.
