[ WP ] A person leaves everything behind to start a new life . Takes nothing but their wallet and car . What led up to this moment ? What happens after ?

This was the day of my grandmothers funeral. Sitting here after a full day of `` mourning.'' I had n't shed a tear yet, was i fucked up? I did n't understand the American way, my fathers side had invited all of my grandmothers close friends and family; including the other half of her 2nd husbands family. 
 
 Drunk by the fire the day was getting late. As always in the Northwest, it was raining. A gentle sort of rain, a distinctly northwest type of rain to accompany a true portlander to her after-life. I felt the warmth of the burning flame seep past my drunken mind to warm me up from the inside; i was lost in the fires dance. Too busy to think the entire day attending all the proper customs that dictate a funeral. Perhaps I had n't cried yet today, but i today I could not smile. I did n't understand why people had to go around laughing and being happy on the day of her funeral. 
 
 Later as guests started to leave I collapsed again by the dying fire with my family to enjoy our last night in a house built 44 years ago by the hands of my grand-father. All too tired and too drunk we must not have been thinking clearly. When I declined a DD ride from my family to send me to see my girl-friend currently staying near, i used the phrase `` not wanting to use the family card.'' My dad later says he does n't recall saying this, but he threatened me, on the day of my grandmothers funeral after I declined leaving to spend ten minutes by the fire with him. It must have been a delayed reaction because only later did I fully realize what he did. As my father was getting scotch I walked up to him and screamed 
 
 `` You Fucking Lil Bitch Dad.'' 
 
 An act I do n't do and would never do, because although my father is a bitch, he is a sensitive bitch who ca n't bear the idea of his son calling him a bitch. I knew this, I do n't know why I did it. My Uncle was restraining himself from knocking me out on the couch, my father stood stock-still confused, my brother grabbed my suit-case, jacket and threw me out. My brother wanted me to stay in the shed, but he beat me up, i think so my father would n't have to do it. 
 
 I wandered to the neighborhood park with my sky-blue suitcase. Lost with $ 100 in my account, and not much else. 
 
 
 I sat down, lit a cigeratte, than I shed a tear. 
 

