[ CC ] An abstract of a movie I want to direct myself with a real film crew . I wish someone to give me Constructive Criticism to see if this is too cheesy and unrealistic or if this has any potential . And just simple opinions too . Would you watch something like this if it was in cinemas ?

First off, I do n't think writing prompts is the place for this - have you tried /r/writing? Or maybe any other subreddit specifically for cinema or screenplay ideas? 
 
 
 I think the idea is not completely coherent, I'm afraid. I had trouble understanding who Fred and John are - are they the same person? Or is Fred a mentor figure. Where is the antagonist in this, is it Fred? Or are they John's problems. It does n't read like a coming of age story, it sounds more like a redemption story. Maybe sit down and think about where the story is going and who exactly the characters are? That's all the advice I really have. Try a subreddit more geared towards this sort of thing!
