[ WP ] '' That 's funny , this shampoo tastes more like conditioner . '' Exclaimed the hunch-playing detective .

I knew she was Trouble the moment she walked into my office. The business card she gave me only confirmed it for me. 
 
 `` Honey J. Trouble, IRS'' I said, reading her card. `` Not that I'm complaining, lady, but what does the IRS want with a lowly dick like me?'' 
 
 She leveled her smoky gaze at me and said `` The same thing we want from all the other dicks out there, Mr Richards. We want your money, which you have n't paid as taxes in a couple of years.'' 
 
 Now, I am not a stupid man. If you doubt that, you should go out of my office and check the sign on the door again. It says `` Richard Richards ( detective )''. And there's one thing you never do unless you're stupid, and that's mess with the IRS. 
 
 `` There must be some mistake, honey'' I said, lighting up a bottle of shampoo. I'd gotten into the habit after the last war, and it had gotten me more than a few odd looks... but I did n't care. `` I've paid all my taxes'', I said, continuing `` not like I made a lot of dough the last couple of years, but I paid my taxes in full''. 
 
 `` You paid the federal and state taxes, Mr Richards. You have n't paid County taxes.'' 
 
 I sighed and drew in on my bottle deeply. Funny, my shampoo tasted more like conditioner. I looked at the label again and found that it was conditioner. 
 
 Kinda absurd is n't it... of all the things that were wrong in my life today, all I could think of was that I had the wrong bottle in my hands. 
 
 I was beginning to get a hunch - and I was not just talking about the physical deformity brought about by my rampant self fellation - I could see this dame was as wrong as the bottle in my hand. 
 
 `` Wait a minute lady... why would the IRS bother about County taxes... would n't they send a county official?'' 
 
 She smiled, and it was n't pretty. In fact'pretty' was not a word I would apply to a dame like her.'Enormous', maybe. Or'Gargantuan'. 
 
 `` You caught me, Dick'' she said, coming closer to me that I was comfortable with `` there's really only one thing I want from you... 
 
 `` I want your dick, Dick Dick ( dick )!''
