[ WP ] Getting tired of always being called upon when the police deem a case un-solvable , you take up a 9 to 5 job . You use your brilliant deductive skills to attempt to make sales and upset almost every customer who speaks to you . You are Sherlock Holmes , used car salesman .

The middle-aged man and his young trophy wife walked briskly into my office. A light haze of opium still hung in the air, faint enough to escape the notice of my supervisor. I deduced from their pace and demeanor that they were excited about the purchase of a used vehicle. 
 
 `` With what can I assist you?'' I asked in many usual tone, wasting time on formalities was never a task to which I was particularly well-suited. I noted the slight straightening of his neck, he was taken aback at my question. 
 
 `` We're here to purchase a car,'' his tone was one of irritation. 
 
 `` Yes, obviously, but I would reconsider the Corvette, you will need a pickup truck.'' I informed him. 
 
 `` But we saw the ad for the Corvette in the paper and he loved the idea,'' she chimed in. 
 
 `` No, madam, you loved the idea. Your husband, on the other hand, needs a pickup truck.'' 
 
 `` But we do n't want a pickup truck,'' the irritation in the man's voice was palpable. `` And I think I'd like to speak to your manager.'' 
 
 `` Certainly,'' I said amicably as I turned and walked toward the break room. Quickly I rummaged through the coat closet and found my brief case. I quickly applied the prosthetic nose, fake handlebar moustache, color contacts and false glasses and changed overcoats. I switched my posture slightly and returned to the couple. 
 
 `` What seems to be the trouble?'' I asked in a soft tone. 
 
 `` Well, your man there wo n't show us the car we were asking about.'' The husband said, maintaining the pretense that he wore the pants in the relationship. 
 
 `` Really? What did he say?'' 
 
 `` He said that i should buy a truck.'' 
 
 `` He is right, you know. When you leave your wife you'll likely need the truck to move your things, and it will save you money on moving truck rental, which would be unnecessary since she will be keeping the house and furniture.'' 
 
 `` Who said anything about leaving my wife?'' The man asked with obvious shock. The young wife looked as though a ghost had passed in front of her. 
 
 `` It is difficult to go on with a relationship like yours when an infidelity is discovered, and your wife is n't nearly clever enough to hide it forever. Additionally, the lawyer she has retained the services of is very capable. I'm confident he will extricate her from the entanglement of the pre-nuptial agreement as easily as he extricated her from her clothes earlier today. Undoubtedly she will cite physical abuse as the necessity for the divorce. No doubt you did n't actually abuse her but she does have a bruise under her right eye concealed by makeup. No doubt she wishes for you to buy the Corvette so that she will have a nice car to drive after the divorce.'' I was admittedly pleased with my deduction and absolutely certain that he would now purchase the truck. 
 
 He stood silently, his gaze affixed on me. He eyed me suspiciously for several seconds before reaching up to peel away my false moustache. 
 
 `` That's it! I'll have your job!'' He and his very relieved wife turned and walked toward the manager's office. I returned to mine and awaited the daily visit from my agitated boss. He arrived several minutes later and explained that I was fired. I tried to explain the manner in which I had reached my undeniable conclusions, but he refused to allow me to explain. When he threw my costume trunk into the parking lot I deduced that I would be unable to convince him not to fire me. The truly bothersome part was that he would n't allow me to reveal my method. 
 
 

