[ WP ] You 're just an average person in The Matrix and do n't know the truth . Weird things keep happening around you .

Trish and I had just about reached the peak of our bi-weekly argument about her parents ( `` It's not my fault they hate you, Ryan! You're the one who said Snookums looked like a bilge rat with a heroin dependency!'' ) when I decided I'd had enough, threw up my hands, and went out onto the balcony for a smoke. 
 
 Snookums. That godforsaken little weasel of a dog had been on my case as long as I'd known Trish. The first time I visited her parents, Snookums went for my ankles with the ferocity and implacability of a Patriot missile system, and I damn near broke his little neck with a reflexive kick that sent him careening across the room and into a Japanese vase. That had set the tone perfectly for the remainder of my relationship with the in-laws. 
 
 As I leaned on the railing, I became aware of a commotion in the courtyard six stories below. A group of suited men were attempting to subdue a lone nutjob clothed in flowing black robes and sunglasses. Fists and feet were flying, and it was hard to tell exactly what was going on, but the gist of it seemed to be that the nutjob had the jujitsu arsenal to hold his own even against six guys. 
 
 `` Hey!'' I shouted, as the kung fu guy ripped a tetherball pole out of the ground. `` Hey! You ca n't just break shit, man!'' 
 
 There went another tetherball court. The next time Brad wanted a game, we'd have to go down the street to the public playground, which was always embarrassing, what with the kiddies flinging mulch and running into the line of fire. That's a fun conversation to have with another adult your age: explaining why their six-year-old took a tetherball at decidedly serious velocity to the back of the head, while the kid lies face-down in the dirt, shrieking such that you'd think somebody'd ripped his kidneys out. 
 
 More of the suited guys were pouring into the courtyard, which suited me just fine. I saw a bench crumble to dust as four people were flung into it at once ( I had to admit, the tetherball pole was doing *work* ). Management would n't lift a finger to fix any of this shit, that was for sure. It had been enough of a struggle to get them to fix my sink when wastewater was belching out of the drain all hours of the day and night. 
 
 It looked like the suited men were gaining the upper hand. There was an army of them, it seemed like. I could n't see the black-clad nutjob any longer. He was buried beneath a pile of bodies like a football after a fumble. More guys kept running into the courtyard and jumping on, which I kind of figured was overkill, until all of a sudden the tetherball ninja BURST OUT THROUGH ALL OF THEM AND FLEW INTO THE SKY, at which point I took a real hard look at the cigarette I'd been smoking, just to make sure I had n't accidentally been taking hits from something a whole lot more powerful, and then decided that maybe it was time to go back inside, and take a long hard think about what I'd just seen, and maybe see if Trish had cooled off a bit and wanted to order Indian, the way we always did after a fight, or when a human being flew straight up and vanished into the sky, Team Rocket style, that maybe it was my turn to apologize, then, to Trish, because it did seem to me in retrospect, based on the flying guy maybe being a vision from God, that perhaps I had been a bit harsh on her parents, and might just want to lighten up a smidge, just this once.
