[ WP ] You are a pyrokinetic who tends to accidentally set things on fire when stressed . And today , you 're having a very bad day .

`` I can safely say that I am irritable at the best of times. 
 
 `` This is not the best of times. In fact, I would not even class this as the worst of times. In the worst of times I could at least light a bin on fire and watch it until I'm calm. Today however... well the receptionist is going to need plastic surgery, let's just say that. 
 
 `` The office is used to the little fires. I think they only put up with it because I'm good at the job, but we doubled down on fire blankets recently. The thing with working in a call centre is that you tend to learn to tune out the idiots on the other end of the phone. The problems come with actually talking to them. 
 
 `` Now Kevin is n't a bad person. He's not a great person either, he's just stupid. More than once he's decided that the best thing to do is try to play a joke on me while I'm working, and quite accidentally ended up running his hand under a tap a minute later. The thing is, he knew I was worked up. If he did n't, the fire alarm bursting into flame as I stormed into the building should have been a nice clue. A nice amalgation of an attempted mugging, no sleep, the police coming round due to said mugging, three traffic jams due to accidents in the road, a low flying bird shitting in my tea and a small child punching me in the crotch were enough for one day. The last thing I needed was that... person. 
 
 `` Oh well, I suppose it's another arson charge they ca n't prove. Sometimes I love CCTV proving I could n't have done anything. Other times I hate the fact it brings the police round for questions. Did I mention I do n't like talking to police? It just makes me... gah! Great, now the desk is on fire. Thanks. Next time, do n't ask how my day was, alright? Now go fetch a fire extinguisher before you need someone to fetch it for you.''
