[ WP ] You have finally perfected the formula for immortality . However , one day , you fall prey to something deadly .

It ’ s easy to be all optimistic about something when you ’ re pretty sure it ’ s impossible. And so when we ’ d spent long nights in the lab, days hashing out the problem in the conference room, there ’ d still been a kind of fundamental optimism driving everything. Even when it all started to fall apart - that kind of hopeful energy can only sustain a person for so long, and it ’ d been months with no progress - even when the rest of the team had moved on, and it was just Rebecca and me, I still thought we were going to fix the world. 
 
 “ I mean, no more death. Just imagine it. ” She smiled as we recited the next part together. “ That inevitable march towards death is what defines us. No more pain. No more goodbyes. We hold the keys, and we will unlock the door. Together, we enter the age of the post-human. ” 
 
 Dr. Harris had written that paper, back when I was just the assistant. Before the cancer. No more cancer, too. 
 
 And so the months wore on, and we resequenced the Turritopsis doohmii DNA. 
 
 I think it ’ s impossible to work so closely with someone and not love them. Oh, there was no romance, nothing like that. We didn ’ t speak of it. But the way Rebecca would touch my arm, her contagious enthusiasm, her smile… 
 
 In hindsight, I think her approval meant as much as our work to me. 
 
 But failure and doubt were another sort of cancer. They ’ d killed off the rest of the team, and at last they came for Rebecca and me. It had been two years since the last breakthrough. 
 
 I worked harder than ever. I couldn ’ t admit my greatest fear - not just that I ’ d wasted years of my life, but that my hope, my purpose, had been a lie. I wasn ’ t sleeping, I was constantly sick. I felt something beyond frustration. It was like I was banging rocks together, day after day after day after day. 
 
 Rebecca seemed to lose interest. She started making mistakes. She wanted us to start leaving the lab earlier. Go out for food instead of ordering in. 
 
 She asked me what I wanted to do next, after this project finished. 
 
 I just worked harder. I didn ’ t want her to see how angry I was. I ’ m pretty sure she knew. 
 
 And then it all came together. Rebecca was asleep on the fold-out in the hall - she wasn ’ t putting in the long hours anymore, but she still spent her nights at the lab - but my shouting must ’ ve woken her. 
 
 I was disappointed by her reaction. “ That ’ s fantastic, ” she said as she hugged me, but it wasn ’ t her old enthusiasm. 
 That ’ s when I realised just how much I needed her approval. “ Let ’ s do it. Right now, ” I said. 
 
 She pulled away. “ What? No, no, listen, I know you ’ re excited, but clinical trials are a long way… ” 
 
 “ I don ’ t care. ” I don ’ t know if it was joy, or frustration, or anger. Maybe I was manic. “ Let ’ s do it. Right now. ” 
 
 She burst into tears. 
 
 I didn ’ t know what to do. I ’ d never seen her like this. I ’ d done it, I ’ d actually done it, but everything I felt was draining away as I watched her sob. Well, not everything, but how could I be feeling lost at a time like this? 
 
 She buried her face against my chest. I put my arms around her. This wasn ’ t how it was meant to be. 
 
 “ I don ’ t think this is a good thing, ” she said quietly. I wasn ’ t sure what she meant, so I waited. “ This whole project, ” she said, looking up at me. Her mascara had run. When did she start wearing makeup to the lab? “ I ’ ve been thinking. I didn ’ t think it would matter. I didn ’ t think we could do it. But now… I ’ ve been thinking about Dr. Harris ’ s paper. ‘ That inevitable march towards death is what defines us. ’ I don ’ t… I don ’ t think we understand what we ’ re doing. I don ’ t think we ’ re ready for this. ” 
 
 I didn ’ t say anything. I didn ’ t understand. Why was this a problem now? 
 
 “ This sounds like some stupid cliche, but… ” She rubbed her eyes. “ We are what we are, right? We ’ re human, and that means we get sick. It means we die. It means we ’ re… we ’ re like… ” She shook her head in frustration. “ People are like fireworks. We ’ re noisy, and complicated, and we end. But in the meantime it ’ s beautiful, and… ” 
 
 Her eyes were so blue. “ This is my life, ” she whispered. “ It ’ s messy and it ’ s going to end one day… but I really like it. ” 
 
 Deleting the work was easier than I thought it would be. I ’ m still not sure that we did the right thing. Maybe we missed our chance to take a great leap into the unknown. Or maybe I ’ d messed up a formula and it wouldn ’ t have worked. I don ’ t know. 
 
 There ’ s a lot I don ’ t know. But we held hands and watched our work disappear, and I realised it didn ’ t matter. We ’ d figure some things out together.
