[ WP ] Satan is a single father trying to raise his son , who , in a rebellious phase , is all into peace , love , and harmony .

`` JESUS. What are you doing? I told you I was trying to meet my quota for this quarter on spoiled souls but you're up there spreading this peace and love stuff.'' Satan said hotly to his son. 
 
 `` Dad you do n't get it, Hell's cooling is a big deal and the more turned souls we get all at once is accelerating the process. I mean, Ireland just beat New Zealand and the cubs won the World Series. Everyone thinks Hell has already frozen over. We need to be proactive and I know sin is the family business but we need to look after Hell and it's demons!'' Satan's son Jesus replied. 
 
 `` Damnit boy! You have to damn it! If it's not damned then it's not done. That's the bottom line. I lead this place and I need to have respect from everyone down here otherwise it all goes to heaven! Those white shirts with their wings think they know what existence is and how life should be. I'll be saved if I give them the chance to run it their way. And to heaven with this'Hell cooling' business. It's just a bunch of gospel! I knew naming you after your uncle was a bad idea but I owe his father for putting Lego bricks in the carpet. Heh, makes me laugh every time someone stomps on one.'' Satan ended on a smile. 
 
 `` Yeah, I have to admit the lego bricks in the carpet were great. No argument there. But you should really look at Hells cooling as a serious deal. If it gets too cold then we could be looking at a third coming.'' Jesus said with a sobering tone. 
 
 `` I had n't thought of that. You're right son. We need to look at this from as aspects. I'll run it by the committee tomorrow. Maybe hitler could put in an awe full word for me with MJ. I need those votes to get the new Trump policy to move forward. Boy, I want you to know I hate you. I hate you more than anything.'' Satan said with a tear in his eye. 
 
 `` Fuck you dad. Fuck you a lot'' Jesus said starting to tear up himself. 
 

