[ WP ] After a bizarrely grueling interview process , you 've finally been hired at the local shop ... on your first day you find out the real reason for the screening .

`` Sorry we do what here?'' 
 
 `` Is that like'we do what here?' you did n't hear or'we do what here?' you heard but you do n't believe it'' 
 
 `` The second one'' 
 
 `` So you do n't actually want me to repeat what I just said?'' 
 
 `` It would help'' 
 
 `` Ok we're a corner store so we sell basic goods. Milk, some bread, cigarettes, candy stuff like that'' 
 
 `` Got that part'' 
 
 `` And sometimes we kill aliens who are trying to set up an outpost on Mars with drones'' 
 
 `` I...'' 
 
 `` We're using the drones. I realize now that was a bad way to phrase it'' 
 
 `` I...'' 
 
 `` I do n't want you thinking that we're up there killing alien drones. We pilot the drones and kill the aliens'' 
 
 `` You fucking killing Martians with drones?'' 
 
 `` No'' 
 
 `` Ok so you're just like fucking with me you're now going to explain to me how I was wrong on some small technical detail and you still actually kill Martians with drones are n't you?'' 
 
 `` Well they're not Martians'' 
 
 `` Ok'' 
 
 `` Yeah we do n't really know where they come from. And again to reiterate, we have the drones not them'' 
 
 `` I...'' 
 
 `` In all fairness they have robots but we think they're autonomous'' 
 
 `` This is fucking insane'' 
 
 `` Right?'' 
 
 `` Why are you in charge of this'' 
 
 `` Oh well the government needs to keep it off the books so... yeah'' 
 
 `` I... the....'' 
 
 `` Did n't you find it weird when we asked you how many hours a day you play video games in your interview'' 
 
 `` You did n't ask me that?'' 
 
 `` Oh did I not. Shit. Sorry I smoke a lot of weed in this job, and I'm pretty certain it's fucking with my memory. I did n't even remember that you were coming in today'' 
 
 `` This is... I do n't...'' 
 
 `` So we're going to start you on the counter and when you're ready... you can come help us kill aliens with drones. Again we have the drones not them'' 
 
 ``...'' 
 
 `` Uh, feel free to eat throughout the day. Snacks and stuff free, that's a perk. Also, getting to kill aliens with drones. We use the drones'' 
 
 `` Stop saying that'' 
 
 `` I have a good feeling about you''
