[ WP ] A new antidepressant is launched . It does the job , but it radically changes who you are and what you like to do . People who take it like their new personality and who they 've become . Their ( former ) friends miss the original person .

I ’ ve been to the darkest places, so dark, so empty. Even at the tender age of 10 I was thinking how badly I wished I was never born. It was cold inside, this constant feeling of chills surging from inside you. You can ’ t really describe it in a way that doesn ’ t sound like some bullshit letter written by a faker emo kid. Literally the only way I can began to describe it at it ’ s worse is like cold rain. 
 
 
 You ever stand in that? It ’ s wet and freezing oddly romantic and beautiful, tragic as hell though. It ’ s like that but internalize it. Bring the feeling deeps inside you. Make it part of who you are. Now imagine that every single day of your life everyday endlessly. Imagine how it crushes your soul. Day by day you think of yourself not as a human being but as something worthless. More akin to a broken doll discarded piece of crap that you are. You ’ re worthless, you ’ re ugly, and you ’ re a piece of shit. You repeat this over and over again to yourself until it becomes the truth. It ’ s like the sky is blue, and you ’ re a piece of shit. It ’ s the truth no other explanation. 
 
 
 Beauty is when that ’ s your world you tend to do what others want. You do what people think is “ right ”. Sex is bad? Okay that ’ s out. You ’ re fucking ugly anyway so no ones screwing you anytime soon anyway; problem solved. The closest you ’ ll get is fake love letters and laughing. Partying? Yeah that ’ s a no go. No one likes you anyway. No one wants to be around an ugly bastard like you fat ass. You ’ re lucky they don ’ t throw up looking at you. They want you to draw for them? Better do it. Don ’ t want them to hate you more. They want you to go learn this or that? Better do it. Doesn ’ t matter you if want it. What if they hate you more when you say no? Better make those webpages, drive the car your terrified of, do this, do that. Don ’ t want to let people down. What if they leave you? You ’ re already worthless, you can ’ t say afford to say no. 
 
 
 But when you take this medicine you change. Not some major change. You just learn an important word, no. People leave when you say no. They leave because they can ’ t get things anymore. No more doing the homework for them? No more designing the pages for them so they can impress friends? Yeah not cool. That ’ s too different. What happened to you? Why are you so different? You become bolder. You say no to things. Then you say yes to what you want. You become distinctly…you. You become the person you wanted. You tell people how you really feel. People hate it…at least the ones who never really knew you as you are. There gone. To different to not get what you want anymore. That sucks who wants that? Plus side is. You get your freedom. You become free from the shackles of low self esteem. But you also lose friends. Hell worth every friend lost though. 

