[ WP ] Jesus was sent from the future to find the girl and save her from stoning

They say that for every clever saying, there is an equally clever saying conveying the exact opposite meaning. Empty barrels make the most noise, filled barrels are hardest to bear. I remember as a child, when I first heard someone say: `` Ignorance is bliss''. The apparent tone of intellectual surrender in the phrase annoyed me to no end, so I came up with my own response: `` Bliss is for he, who delivers blessings.'' 
 
 Now as I've come of age, I've come to appreciate the simple beauty of the original statement, while my own retort leaves a bitter sweet taste in my mouth. 
 
 As you well know, a perk of living in a post-scarcity technocratic society is that everyone is free to pursue the knowledge, he craves, for his own curiosity's sake, without having to worry about jobs, debts or social pressure as in the olden times. Most people are content with living a simple life, as is understandable from a evolutionary viewpoint, but as for myself, I craved something more ever since I was little. My parents sensed my lust for intellectual challenges, and enrolled me in school - a voluntary luxury - where I made my first encounters with the wonders of our world. I was hooked, like the greens are hooked on Flair, and I've pretty much lived my life in various educational and scientific establishments ever since. 
 
 I found after a while, that although I was appreciative of everything I learned, the field that had me quivering with excitement was none other than History. I must've read several terabytes of books, articles, correspondences and letters, and have around a zettabyte more stored in my hippocampal chip, for future cross-referencing. I have traveled backwards through time, both literally and figuratively, and observed seemingly minor ( but evidently important ) as well as major events from the 4th all the way through the 8th millenia B.E.C.. Most of these sightings have intrigued me, some have puzzled me, and some have simply amused me. 
 
 W.J. Browning's irrefutable proof that the timeline is unalterable, and that all interactions with time travelers are already implemented as factual, historical occurrences, gave a huge peace of mind to those who have ventured through those crevaces of the universe, and it is a strange satisfaction, when you realise, that a thing you read about years ago turns out to have been caused by yourself. Some times you know it before you depart, but some times you do n't realise it until you're right in the middle of it. Many attempts have since been made to disprove Browning's theorem, but all ended up either failing, or simply causing what was already well documented disasters. All evidence points to it being a simple fact of nature, and in time it was accepted, and people instead made a hobby out of `` claiming'' past events ( Yes, the term is a bit misleading, as the timeline is of course still locked in place, and for every event, only one predetermined traveler has always been the one, who would cause it. But in accordance with the Humane Free Will conjecture, I have stuck with the official terminology. ) I myself am for example responsible for the huge spike in celebrity deaths in the year 6032 B.E.C., and the development of the atomic bomb only some seventy years prior. I took a particular liking to this period in time, as you may have guessed. 
 
 Since Browning published his result, a whole new field of study has arised, namely the discovery of peculiar past events, that must have been caused by time travelers, but whose origin is yet to be determined, since it allows the discoverer to make attempts at claiming the event. I myself made such a discovery recently, and have repeatedly visited the year 8029 B.E.C., where a man named Jesus heals a woman from her leprosy by a single touch. The technology for this did n't exist at the time, but it does now, so I've made countless attempts at finding the time and place where I could hand it over to this man Jesus, but to my great astonishment, for a long time this went on without any luck. 
 
 The discoverer of an event is also the claimer in almost all instances, so this of course seemed odd to me. I could have asked my colleagues for advice, but part of the sport is doing it on your own, and besides - I am probably one of only a few people aware of this event, and I would n't want competition to arise by alerting others to its presence. I have struggled with claiming this event way too long for someone to jump in and snap it away from me at the last second. I decided to go back even further, to when the man was a child, but still to no avail. Out of frustration, I decided to abandon the project for a while, and return at a later time if new ideas showed themselves, and I went back to my previous project - cataloguing the worldwide cultures at the time of the First Nuclear Warfare. 
 
 On one of these trips however, I stumbled across a peculiar book, called `` The Bible'', which I later found out ( and imagine my surprise as well as the touch of shame for not having noticed earlier ) had existed in various renditions for over a thousand years. A quick chip scan confirmed this, but the reason it interested me, was because the book spoke of the man Jesus, and his healing of the Leper woman! I was taken aback, and quickly sat down to read the book in its entirety, end to beginning as is often favorable. It was written in the mythic style, referring to Jesus' powers as divine and originating from some higher power. This was it, I thought. The `` higher power'' or `` God'', as he was called in the book, would of course be me, and perhaps the book held some description of the circumstances of him obtaining these powers. 
 
 As it turns out, however, the book insists he was born with them, and the God was Jesus' father... 
 This seemed odd at first, because one of the consequences of having a static timeline is that you can not reproduce with people of the past, as this would lead to the classic grandfather paradox. I searched for a long time to find the mother of Jesus, and when I did, and asked her how her child was conceived, she told a story not much unlike the one depicted in the book, when the years of interpretation are taken into account. 
 
 She told how she had been approached by a specter of sorts, and how when it touched her, she felt a chilling twist of reality followed by a sharp pain in her abdomen. Much later, she realised she was pregnant, and she assumed that the ghost had been responsible for this. When her child grew up, and she saw his capabilities, she had deduced that the ghost must have been their deity, and to be honest, I would have expected even the brightest woman of the time to have come to the same conclusion... 
 
 I took a walk in the streets to think things over, when I came across Jesus, who seemed to be agitated over something. As I approached him, I noticed that the flow of people in the street seemed to converge on Jesus' location, and now I noticed the woman, he was shielding with his body. 
 
 She was beaten and weak, clenching her legs between her arms and lowering her head to the shouting voices of the onlookers. It appeared the mob wanted her dead, which Jesus would n't let happen. He noticed me in the crowd, and recognized me from my previous visits. He beckoned me to his side, and do n't ask me how, but we managed to talk some sense into the mob, and the mood cooled significantly, especially when I mentioned that they were likely not quite pure and innocent themselves, and they should not be so quick to judge others. The woman thanked us, and Jesus gave his thanks to me as well, saying that this was important to him, although he was n't sure why. Some part of him simply needed that woman to live, despite not knowing who she was. That was tre moment something struck me, and I swiftly ended the conversation with Jesus, to follow the woman. I caught up with her, and although she was shocked by my sudden approach at first, she invited me to her home, when I told her that I, like her, was from the future. And that I was pretty sure we had a deed to do. 
 
 
 Here I stand now, years later, with my wife by my side, having just put the final touches on the genetic modifications, that will allow this embryo to grow into a human capable of a great many things, including, but not limited to: excreting antibodies for almost all known diseases, ressurecting under sufficiently mild circumstances of death, developing extremely hydrophobic skin on the soles of his feet... and saving his mother's life, with a little help from his father. 
 
 I suppose it's always hard to say goodbye to your child but it is comforting to know he will meet both of us after all, despite being born almost ten thousand years apart. Knowing that you're also sending him to an all too early death is harder to accept as a parent, and it is with tearful gestures that we launch the machine, and mark our place in history as the first people to chronoport an embryo directly into the womb of a fertile woman. I like to entertain the thought, that if I had never learned of Jesus, I would've never had to give him up, and so I would've been spared from this heartache. But this would in turn require that I did n't know about Browning's Law... So in a strange way, ignorance could have been bliss. 
 
 Now I only wish for bliss upon he, who shall deliver blessings.
