[ CW ] Re-tell a popular/well-known story but do so using a different author 's writing style

Samuel could n't help but stare. His life drifted from once instance of rejection to the next, a veritable string of disappointments, but one of these times would be different, right? Not really, no. People do n't change. The bald man who reeked of cigarette smoke and regret as he sat in the corner reading a pamphlet on `` How To Deal With Cancer'' was indicative of that. A sigh and a glance downward broke Samuel's train of thought. A tone over the speaker and a droning female voice called him forward. He straightened and readied his business pitch. Maybe this would be different. Then again, maybe that deranged cat lady over on 38th would magically become pregnant in her late sixties. His chances seemed about as slim. As soon as the eyes of the man in front of him met his own, those infinitesimal chances all but shattered. 
 
 `` GOD DAMNIT! NO! I'M NOT INTERESTED!'' 
 
 Samuel found himself on the street once more, air smoky and acrid. He nodded to the man with lung cancer killing himself out front with a wry smile. 
 
 `` I do n't suppose you'd be interested in some green eggs and ham?'' 
 
 
 -Chuck Palahniuk
