[ WP ] Science is actually a government conspiracy against magical beings . Magic is strongest when believed in so teaching things like how viruses not curses cause diseases weakens witches/wizards/etc that could harm the human race .

Lindsey raised her eyebrows without widening her eyes, managing to convey both surprise and skepticism. She looked from her husband, Bob, to the goldfish bowl that he had suspended in mid-air. He nodded at her encouragingly. 
 
 `` You see? Magic. Not much of it, unfortunately - because, magic is strongest when believed in so teaching things like how viruses not curses cause diseases weakens witches/wizards/etc that could harm the human race.'' 
 
 Lindsey looked blank for a few more seconds. Then her eyebrows furrowed. `` Uh, huh, right. Can we just go back for a sec to the bit where science is a government conspiracy?'' 
 
 `` It is!'' said Bob, throwing up his arms. The goldfish sloshed dangerously. Lindsey kept her eyes on it as he continued to gesticulate. `` Right from the start! They invented it in the 18th century to explain stuff to the masses, just like they invented the Ancient Greeks! Before then, everyone knew about magic.'' 
 
 Lindsey was still looking at the goldfish bowl, which was wobbling increasingly violently. Her expression had returned to that of a woman talking to an imbecile. `` The Ancient Greeks,'' she murmured, distractedly. `` Honey, could you maybe put the bowl back down now?'' 
 
 His furious expression changed swiftly to embarrassment as he steadied the hovering bowl and replaced it on the kitchen counter. `` Sorry.'' 
 
 `` That's fine,'' said Lindsey, returning her gaze to him and taking a sip of coffee. `` So you were saying about science being a conspiracy.'' 
 
 `` I'm telling you, I can prove it!'' 
 
 `` Right. So the process of discovering new information by observation of experimental data... that's just made up?'' 
 
 `` Well...'' 
 
 `` So if I were to inspect infected tissue under an electron microscope, you're telling me I would n't find viruses colonising the cells? Even though I've done that dozens of times before?'' 
 
 `` I-'' 
 
 `` You know I work at a biotech firm, right? We make money from science. How can they afford to employ me without government finance?'' 
 
 `` But... but, magic!'' Bob's lower lip was starting to quiver. He began to lift the goldfish again, but Lindsey swiftly leant forward and pulled it back down to earth. 
 
 `` That's cool, honey, I get it. No need to show me again. I'll tell you what, why do n't we go down to the lab, run a few tests, see if we can find how this is working? We can use this bizarre idea I've thought of where we use and create knowledge in the form of testable explanations and predictions about the Universe.'' 
 
 Bob was crying now. Lindsey put her arm around him. 
 
 `` That's OK, sweety. Most times, people find science is way better at explaining magic than magic is at explaining science. But it's cool you've got powers!'' 
 
 She shepherded Bob out of the house and into the car and told him to hang tight for one minute while she returned to the kitchen. She detached a hidden panel and removed a crystal ball from the enclave within. After muttering a few incantations, the head of bearded man with a pointy hat could be seen in the ball. 
 
 `` What is it, agent Zotorff?'' asked the wizard, angrily. 
 
 `` My husband, the one I monitor. He has developed the power... and he believes he is onto us. I am bringing him in now. I had to use my most powerful Patronisation Charm to subdue him,'' reported Lindsey. 
 
 `` Excellent work,'' muttered the old man, raising his arm. `` Long live the cabal!''
