[ WP ] `` You are n't special , you are n't special at all ''

“ You aren ’ t special, You aren ’ t special at all. ” 
 
 “ Yes momma… ” Casey hugged her knees into her chest as her mother went on another tirade about her. 
 
 “ You ’ re so lucky you have such a caring mother! Not many women would look after someone as useless as you, you know! ” 
 
 “ I know, momma. ” Casey sniffed as her mother continued 
 
 “ Your Pop, he left, couldn ’ t deal with you.. But I stayed! I clothed you, I fed you, and I taught you, and still you can ’ t do anything. You ain ’ t smart and you ain ’ t special. You just exist, and it ’ s up to me to look after you! ” 
 
 “ Thank you momma… ” 
 
 “ Now you look at me when I talk to you young lady! It ’ s awfully rude for you to glare at the floor like that. ” 
 
 Casey lifted her eyes to her mothers, accustomed to the resentment she saw in her eyes. Her mother tried to disguise it with a smile, and gestured for Casey to stand up, bringing her into a hug. 
 
 “ Now Casey, don ’ t look so sad! Your mother loves you, what is there to be upset about? ” 
 
 “ Nothing momma… ” Casey leaned into her mother ’ s hug as she played with a strand of her hair 
 
 “ That ’ s right! Stop moping about and making the house appear more depressing than you usually do ” 
 
 “ I ’ m sorry momma, I ’ ll try to be more cheerful for you ” Casey stepped back, a weak smile plastered on her face. 
 
 Her mother tutted at her attempt. 
 
 “ It ’ s a start I suppose… But do try a little harder dear. Practice… Now off to bed with you ” 
 
 “ Yes Momma. Goodnight Momma, I love you ” 
 
 “ I love you too dear, God Bless. ” 
 
 Casey turned to her bedroom and practiced making her smile real as she prepared for bed. She tried to think of a happy memory to try and replicate any joy, but couldn ’ t think of one. 
 
 As she got into bed she muttered the mantra that had been drilled into her her whole life, 
 
 “ I ain ’ t special, I ain ’ t special at all… ” 

