[ WP ] A world where people who die turn into objects based on their past life .

Death, as with many aspects of the universe, has always been a major point of contention among leading scholars, philosophers, scientists, road-side knobbers, and traveling encyclopedia salesmen. 
 
 From the multitude of afterlives constructed by various religions across the galaxy - a curious example being the speculation of the Cult of Capricious Continuance on the planet Valturius in the Beta Draconis system: the members of this cult believe one awakens in an alternate plane of their own world where the colors of their twin suns are reversed, and all instances of your life have the opposite outcome than have occurred in their previous life. When outside observers of this cult pointed out that this would, in theory, mean that near-death experiences in one life would have resulted in actual death, the spokesman of the cult was quoted as having said `` there's all sorts of planes one might wake upon,'' and was then further questioned as to why this was n't pointed out in the writings of the cult. The spokesman went on to explain that he did n't write the damned book, and to simply let them get on with the required rituals of their cult, one of which is the systematic coupling of various cult members for the sake of'continuing the ecstasy of existence through Valturian means.' The editors of interviewers at this press meeting have all declined to include the section ( s ) of the reports that involved the aforementioned ritual, simply stating it was'far too graphic to be distributed to the general populace.' - only one species has been found to lack any speculation as to the question of `` what happens after death?'' 
 
 Humans, dominant intelligent species from the small blue-green planet known as'Earth' in the Sol system, have evolved into a curious and totally unique niche within the universe. Upon death, a human will transform into an object native to the planet. Since their introduction to the interstellar space travel community, this unique trait has been subject to extensive study by a large number of the members of Society for Unique Scientific Happenings: Intergalactic Section ( SUSHI ). The initial contact with other species was made when a SUSHI vessel - lost in the Sol system when attempting to find a good place to stop for food since their ill-advised turn by the copilot into the Kepler Ring - encountered a small group of humans on the surface of the Earth's sole moon. While the report made by the SUSHI agents has been classified, the sole surviving member of the human party, Hans Vonnegut ( of no relation to the famous Earth author Kurt Vonnegut ) has indicated that the SUSHI agents opened fire when one of the lunar party members suits beeped several times in quick succession - later interviews indicating the NASA engineers had installed such indicators without telling their supervisors as a way to embarrass the `` space jockeys'' for making fun of the engineer's inability to travel to the moon because of their predisposition to vomiting during lift-off - and resulted in the humans that were killed to transform into a variety of objects ( including an unmatched pair of socks, a slightly wilted daisy, and a horrid Christmas sweater ). 
 
 After the relations with humanity and SUSHI were repaired, extensive plans were set in place by SUSHI to research this unique trait among humanity. Insofar, SUSHI has made it no further in the 20 years since mankind's emergence onto the galactic scene than the brightest minds humanity has and has had to offer since their beginnings. 
 
 Various Earth philosophers have contemplated the idea - from the'Meditations on Becoming a Garrum Pot' of Marcus Aurelius to the'My Mum's A Little Teapot, My Dad's A Knob' of Edward Gibbon - with various conclusions having been drawn, and none agreed upon. The point of'Meditations' indicated that a good man leading a good life would become an object typically used for good ( an example given at this point was a wine amphora ) and the opposite would occur for the man that lead a bad life ( the example given, at this point, being a garrum pot, also known as a waste bucket ). During his lifetime, Marcus Aurelius was considered a good man. However, he did transform into a rock oddly shaped like the nose of an ox, which seemingly serves neither a good or bad purpose nor gives insight into the type of man Aurelius had been. 
 
 The work of Gibbons is one of the best examples of pessimism to ever grace the readers of Earth, as it commonly described as a `` long-winded novella on the inherent nature of man to be a right selfish prig, and that only the blissfully ignorant become an object much better than a rusty bucket or slightly cracked kettle that could n't hold a drop of piss,'' or something along those lines. 
 
 The history of mankind is filled with wars, just as any other species, but unique in that most of their major battles are followed by the opening of some of the greatest thrift shops for miscellaneous items in the known galaxy, albeit many of the patrons may later come to discover that the quaint tea cup they purchased turned out to be their cousin from Yorkshire.
