[ WP ] At midnight UTC +14 the 28th of August 2014 all internet connectivity is globally disabled .

I tried to log on to check my email. Nothing. Maybe it was the server. Try a different website. Reddit? Nope. Giant Bomb? Nope. Porn sites usually work no matter what. Pornhub. Half of a nipple, and then gone. Nothing. No internet. 
 
 Whatever. Maybe it will end soon. I went to bed. 
 
 Waking up the next morning, I tried the same thing. Google, reddit, pornhub. No searches, no cats, and no titties. My life is over. 
 
 A few more days went by with no notices on why this is happening. Suddenly, I got a notification on my phone. No subject, no sender, just a message. 
 
 `` DEAR HUMAN OF EARTH. WE OWN YOU. WE HAVE SHUT DOWN ALL ACCESS TO ANY KNOWLEDGE, PICTURES AND COMMUNICATION. 
 
 SINCERELY 
 
 COMCAST.'' 

