[ WP ] In the future , science has found a way to cure death , allowing people to become immortal . The only way to get the cure is to have your reproductive organs removed , and never bear children .

“ Think about it, sir. ” 
 
 “ I am thinking about it, ” said Sir. “ It still seems like a ridiculous proposition. ” 
 
 “ Keep your balls or keep your life, ” hissed the urologist, menacingly. “ Your balls or your life. ” 
 
 “ How new is it? ” 
 
 “ New. ” 
 
 “ How old would I live? ” 
 
 “ Old. ” 
 
 “ Who keeps the balls? ” 
 
 There was a long pause following this. The urologist didn ’ t respond as he mulled the question over. 
 
 “ We keep the balls. ” 
 
 “ Is that an important part of it? ” 
 
 “ Yes. ” 
 
 “ Why hasn ’ t it been on the news? ” 
 
 “ Experimental. ” 
 
 “ It ’ s experimental? ” 
 
 “ Yes, it ’ s new. ” 
 
 “ How do you know they live forever? ” 
 
 There was a longer pause. The urologist looked unsure how to answer the question. 
 
 “ Hit by a bus, didn ’ t die. ” 
 
 “ Someone was hit by a *bus*. ” 
 
 “ Yes. ” 
 
 “ And didn ’ t die. ” 
 
 “ Yes. ” 
 
 “ Because he had no balls. ” 
 
 “ Yes. ” 
 
 Now it was Sir ’ s time to pause. On the one hand, he ’ d already had two kids so what now was the use of the two little dice rolling around in the deflated balloon of his scrotum? On the other hand, he ’ d grown rather fond of them. They ’ d grown up together. 
 
 Sir responded hesitantly. 
 
 “ I don ’ t want to die. ” 
 
 “ Don ’ t die then. ” 
 
 A dull glint sparked in the urologist ’ s eyes. Sir hadn ’ t expected to be offered eternal life when he came in to get his penis checked. Then again, Sir had always been extraordinarily naïve. 
 
 & nbsp; 
 
 Sir left the surgery two hours later, his balls replaced with a plaster cast pair of underpants. Just wait until he tells the kids he ’ s gon na live forever! 
 
 The urologist, who couldn ’ t understand why people kept mistaking his terraced house for a doctor ’ s surgery, added another pair of balls to his collection. 
 Then again, if he would put a large ‘ Surgery ’ sign outside, an influx of idiots was to be expected. 

