[ WP ] You die during a driving test and awaken in hell . Satan let 's you return to earth if you complete your test and get your licence on the highway to hell . The devil is your driving instructor , and he is VERY picky .

*Every day without fail, a prompt about the divine is posted to WritingPrompts. With so many in need, how can the gods answer the call? The answer is simple: They team up. One group exists to help meet the needs of a prompt-hungry populace: the Pan-Eternal Godhood Bureau Overseeing All Relevant Dieties. The men and women of PEGBOARD strive to keep the replies coming. These are their stories. * 
 
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 `` Is this the control room?'' Satan asked as he walked into the control room. He was n't what you'd expect from a devil - he was human, for one. Looked pretty unsure of himself, but [ it was his third day ] ( https: //www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/5he8it/wp_youve_accidentally_killed_the_devil_god_makes/dazthub/ ) so that was n't too surprising. 
 
 `` That it is,'' I said. I leaned forward to shake his hand. `` Welcome to PEGBOARD command, I take it your indoctrination went well?'' 
 
 Satan nodded. `` Uh, yeah. I've already started a few projects. That's why I'm here, I was hoping you could help me with something.'' 
 
 `` Of course,'' I said, `` that's what we're here for.'' I motioned for Gabrielle - my second in command - to follow us. She was n't as new to her job as Satan was, but she still had a lot to learn. The rest of the technicians in the room knew their job well, they could handle anything short of a dire emergency. 
 
 Satan lead us down the hallway and to one of the many celestial elevators. We piled in and he pressed the button for the basement. 
 
 `` Can you give us a briefing while we wait?'' I asked casually. All the other deities knew by now not to waste our time by waiting to give us the details. Not that it actually mattered to us, usually they were the ones with no time to waste. 
 
 `` Right,'' Satan said. `` Okay, so you know the whole'get out of Hell on a bet' sort of thing?'' 
 
 I nodded. `` Right, classic fiddle contest or game-playing. The latter's usually Death's domain but he does n't mind sharing.'' 
 
 `` Okay, so I did that. I figured these games are all rigged, right?'' 
 
 `` Absolutely,'' I said. `` If you're the one doing them, that is. Death plays a fair game but he's been around longer than anyone so he's simply better at them than anyone else. You, though, you're the prince of lies. You can cheat.'' 
 
 I caught Gabrielle trying not to smirk at this. It was n't the first time we'd had to remind new Satans that they were evil. 
 
 `` That's the problem,'' Satan said. `` I thought this would already be done. The guy agreed to a driver's test, and I stipulated that it had to happen on the Highway to Hell, because I figure what kind of shape is that highway going to be in? He'll hit a pothole a mile in and we'll be done.'' 
 
 I nodded. `` I see the problem,'' I said. 
 
 Gabrielle made a face that said she did n't, but did n't want to look uninformed in the presence of one of our bosses. That was fine, she'd see in just a second. 
 
 The elevator doors opened to the blasted volcano fields that surrounded the Highway. They were bleak, full of ash and skeletons, buzzards in the air, the works. The Highway itself, on the other hand.... 
 
 `` The Highway's perfect?'' Gabrielle asked, apparently shocked into saying something. 
 
 I nodded. `` Twelve lanes, perfectly graded, optimal traffic patterns. Not a pothole or even an overly-sharp curve. It's how souls get to Hell, Gabrielle, it has to be able to handle a *lot* of traffic.'' 
 
 `` What really gets me,'' Satan said, `` is that the asshole who came up with this challenge had to already know that! He saw it on the way in!'' 
 
 `` And you want a way to cheat,'' I said. 
 
 Satan nodded. `` Can I just damn him anyway?'' 
 
 `` Actually,'' I said, `` you can. There's a lot of lore about you sticking to deals that you made, but those were all Satans that came before you, their rules do n't apply. On the other hand, if you throw that away, neither do their powers. If you want to gain the benefits of those thousands of years, you have to also take on the drawbacks.'' 
 
 `` So I have to do the typical Satan thing where I obey the letter of the rule. I could build another highway,'' he was thinking out loud at this point. 
 
 `` That would n't be *the* highway to hell. It'd probably still work, granted, but I do n't think it's what you're looking for,'' I said. 
 
 `` You have an idea,'' he said. 
 
 I frowned. Technically, it was against the rules for me to tell the bosses how to do their jobs. Of course, we'd gone against those rules just a few days ago with the `` Hell Is Other People, Specifically You: How To Do Your Job As Satan'' briefing we'd put together. We got a lot of leeway. 
 
 `` Okay,'' I said finally. `` The highway here, it goes all the way to Dis and into the Seventh Circle, right?'' 
 
 Satan nodded enthusiastically. 
 
 `` And it's one-way, right?'' 
 
 Satan snorted. `` I know I'm new but I've got a little sense.'' 
 
 `` Well that's your answer then, is n't it?'' 
 
 Satan grinned. `` I never said which *direction* they'd be driving, did I?'' He started laughing. 
 
 That's exactly where I'd been trying to lead him. I saw Gabrielle nod appreciatively. 
 
 Satan was n't done. `` And I never said what kind of car they'd get. I'm thinking a'78 Grenada, no power steering, prone to overheating - it is Hell after all.'' 
 
 `` Are we done here?'' Gabrielle murmured to me. 
 
 Satan was obviously talking to himself at this point. `` And the radio only gets Nickelback!'' 
 
 I nodded. `` Yep. I think he'll do fine.''
