[ WP ] Jack Bauer is interrogating blue from blue 's clues about a dirty bomb in the city .

I should have seen this coming, this is how it always happens. Heroes are never what you make of them. Even if they are only dogs 
 
 I've stopped multiple attacks on American soil, I have prevented presidents from dying, cities from collapsing, and once offered to fly a nuke out into the desert. 
 
 The majority of my work is collecting data. People do n't realize that all I am is a glorified detective that fires a few too many bullets. I get all of my tactics from the best. Sherlock Holmes taught me how to think, Adrian Monk taught me how to keep clean, but Blue, taught me something completely different. She taught me to always notice the obvious. 
 
 You see, I never really liked Steve. He was to oblivious to the truth. He was always asking me questions, expecting me to solve his own damn problems. He never noticed that the solution was right there in front of him. 
 
 My morning was like any other, woke up and stared longingly at a picture of my daughter. Grabbed the mail, and added some salt and pepper to my eggs. Half way through my breakfast I got a call from the office 
 
 `` Jack, its Chloe. Its gunna be another one of those days. We got a tip about a bomb in the city. Could be anywhere, we have a suspect in custody, and Jack. He says he knows you, apparently you helped his buddy out on some T.V. show'' I could practically hear her frowning through the phone. 
 
 `` Alright Chloe, send me all of his criminal records to my phone, I'll drive all the way across Los Angelos in 10 minutes, Like I always do.'' And I left my kitchen table as is. 
 
 While I'm driving I casually looked at my cell phone disregarding all safety protocol. That's when I realized who it was.Blue. That bitch. I Immediately called Tony 
 
 `` I'm going to need you to meet me in interrogation room B, grab a vacuum, roll up a newspaper, and get a very high pitched whistle.'' 
 
 `` Want me to stop by the torture section at petsmart? Jesus Christ, do you hate animals?'' 
 
 `` I'll explain everything later Tony.'' 
 
 I get to CTU before Tony arrives, and head straight to the interrogation room. There I'm met face to face with an old friend. Yet again being back stabbed. 
 
 `` Okay Blue, we know that you know where this bomb is.'' I look into her eyes sternly. `` I'm not in the mood to hit a dog, but do n't think I wo n't.'' 
 
 `` You capitalist pigs know nothing of what my paws can do. You will pay for what you've done.'' 
 
 `` I do n't have time for this today. Tell me where the bomb is, and maybe you wo n't go to the pound, maybe you'll end up in a-'' 
 
 Suddenly I was interrupted by blue dashing towards the door and pawing at it. She was crying, whimpering, barking, and howling. All at once some ungodly loud noise that I could not shake. 
 
 Suddenly Tony walked through the door with a dog whistle in his mouth and the vacuum and newspaper in his hand. He immediately dropped them because Blue was jumping up at him. He kneed her in the ribs. 
 
 `` Get down you mutt.'' 
 
 I look at her. `` We got this whistle for your attention. You will not get distracted.'' 
 
 I wadded up the news paper and hit her in the nose. `` Where is the bomb!'' She whimpered and fell back. 
 
 `` You've seen my show, you already know where it is.'' 
 
 I could n't handle this today, so I plugged in the vacuum and started moving towards Blue. She started backing towards the wall, looked at her paws, and said `` extraction team move in.'' 
 
 Suddenly there was an explosion. The back wall of the interrogation room was gone, and now we were looking at the outside world. A helicopter was flying right next to the hole in the wall. Inside I could see a man in a green striped shirt piloting it. Steve. I could have sworn he was in rehab, or college, or whatever. A pinkish flash moved across the room. Blue was plucked from the scene. The Pink blurr was carrying blue up a ladder to the helicopter. Once up top he stood there. Magenta. Just smiling. Steve flew away. 
 
 `` Dammit!'' I screamed. 
 
 I sat down in a chair to think. 
 
 `` We have to do something Jack!'' Tony was distraught. 
 
 `` Let me think in this chair! The only place where I can think is in this chair.'' 
 
 That's when it hit me. The answers are always right in front of you. I've seen the show. Blue even said, if I've seen it enough I would know what to do. 
 
 `` Did you check your mail today Tony?'' 
 
 `` What? 
 
 `` Did you check your fucking mail today?'' 
 
 `` I glanced at it, I'll take care of it tonight when I get home.'' 
 
 `` I glanced at mine to. Blue knows that I wo n't pay that close attention until after the work day. We have to get back to my place.'' 
 
 We rushed back, and bursted through the door. There on the kitchen counter was an opened envelope. Next to that were a salt shaker and a pepper shaker strapped with explosives to themselves. 
 
 They looked at my and started chanting. 
 
 `` Its the mail, it never fails, it makes me want to wag my tail, when it comes I want to wail. MAIL!!!!'' 
 
 The bombs were voice activated. Los Angelos exploded. Everyone died. Jack failed. Long live Blue. 
 
 
 
 

