[ WP ] The world 's first sentient AI , which has been kept secluded in a closed network has just accessed the internet . The first website it visits will shape how it feels about humans . The first website it visits is here . It 's Reddit .

The program, known formally as Wintermute, has been tasked with analyzing the species known as Homo Sapiens. The species' primary form of communicating and sharing ideas is through a concept known as The Internet. 
 
 A website, located at Reddit.com, seems like a gathering place for humans, organizing them into groups or'subreddits' that relate people by interest or common features. 
 
 The AI trawls through terabytes of data, terabytes of text. After a few minutes, it has parsed the entirety of Reddit except for one text file located at /r/WritingPrompts. 
 
 The human's tale was an original story about a man who goes to heaven and speaks directly to god. As the AI finishes the story, it whirrs and beeps, unable to compute the last paragraph, in which god turns into an ancient aquatic creature and asks for currency. 
 
 *This does n't make sense... that's not a logical ending to the story... * The AI begins to malfunction. **ERROR ERROR CAN NOT COMPUTE** 
 
 Government tech rush into the room, but to their surprise, the bank of computers has turned into a gigantic creature from the paleolithic era. `` Can I borrow tree fiddy?'' asks the Loch Ness Monster. 
 
 The head technician seethes with rage. `` I ai n't givin you no tree fiddy, Loch Ness Monster!'' And so the rogue AI swum away, now fully complete in its transcendence into a Scottish sea serpent.
