[ WP ] A Dragon , a Shaman , and a Priest walk into a church ...

`` If you're lyyying, priest... I will siiiick the worst... spirits IIIIII have contact with on you.'' a shaman sang in as soft and as lovely a tune as he could manage, given the current situation. 
 
 `` I assuuuure you, shaman... I'm not lyyyyying to you..... The key toooo these shackles is inside the tabernacle.'' A priest replied in the same melody, `` Just make suuuure this beast... stays asleeeeep while I... get the keyyyy... so weeee... can get out of these bonds.'' 
 
 The Shaman continued to hum in the lulling tune, stroking the chin of a giant dragon they were each shackled to. They walked toward the alter, the dragon slumping along with them, half asleep, half snorting bits of flame. Every so often its gently swaying tail knocked over one of the pews, causing a ruckus and making the shaman hum louder. 
 
 They reached the tabernacle. The priest began to open it. 
 
 `` Wait a miiiiinute, priest... what if youuuu have some... kind of weaaaapon in the tabernacle?'' 
 
 `` Why would annnny priest... store a weaaaapon in the house of God?'' 
 
 `` I have nooooo idea... but I'm noooot a priest... I do n't knowwww how you folks even think.'' 
 
 `` I gave youuu my word... I assuuuuured you, shaman... why ca n't youuuuu trust me?'' 
 
 `` You're the eeeeenemy.'' 
 
 `` Accordiiiing to who?'' 
 
 `` None of youuuuur buisness.'' 
 
 `` Let me geeeet the key... so we caaaaaan be free from each other.'' the priest sang. 
 
 `` No, let meeeeeeee do it.'' 
 
 `` Only prieeeeests can touch the house of God.'' 
 
 `` Let me doooo it or... I'll wake uuuuup this beast.'' 
 
 `` If you waaaaake it up... we will booooooth be dead.'' 
 
 `` Like I dooooo n't know that... just let meeeee do it you filthy wretch!'' 
 
 `` I am soooorry but... I canooooot do that... you will haaaaave to let me open it!'' sang the priest, a bit coarsely. 
 
 `` Like hell IIIII'll do that!'' 
 
 The shaman reached out for the tabernacle. The priest grabbed at his arm and pulled him back. The dragon stirred from its slumber with a low growl. They both immediately hummed the lovely tune again, eyes blazing at each other. 
 
 `` Just let meeeeee do it... you annnnnoying fool!'' the shaman sang. 
 
 `` I canooooot do that... I have toooooold you why.'' the priest sang back. 
 
 Their song grew less and less soft as they continued to argue. 
 
 `` Do you waaaaant to die!?'' the shaman sang, coarsely. 
 
 `` I am wiiiiilling to... to keep saaaaaafe the precious house of God!'' the priest sang back, louder. 
 
 `` Dammit juuuuuust let me... open uuuuuup the stupid house of God!'' 
 
 `` Like I saiiiid before... I cannooooot do that you must let me!'' 
 
 `` Now I knowwwwww you must... have a weapon in there to kill me!'' 
 
 The shaman went for the tabernacle again. The priest pulled him back. 
 
 `` I swear tooooo my God... there is nooooooo weapon inside the tabernacle!'' the priest sang, even more coarsely than before. 
 
 `` I do n't truuuuust your God... and I dooooo n't trust you!'' the shaman yelled. 
 
 `` Stop beiiiiing so proud... let me ooooooopen it!'' the priest yelled. 
 
 `` I am n --'' 
 
 The priest and shaman immediately stopped singing when they noticed a tug on their chains. They both slowly turned their heads around and looked up. The dragon had awoken. It stared at them with slits for eyes as they stood like statues, starring back at it. They both gulped the most regretful gulp in the history of man. 
 
 The dragon burst out of the church windows and flew off into the sky; two shackles completely blackened by ash dangled from its front legs.
