[ WP ] You are Linux , and you 've been best friends with your roommate Windows 7 for many years . You wake up one morning and find your roommate has been replaced by Windows 8.1 .

`` I want you to touch me.'' 
 
 William had always been a bit of an oddball, but this was perhaps the most /dev/urandom good morning he'd ever uttered. I wondered if maybe some new language pack had been installed with an errant key or something. Whatever the reason, there he was. Standing tall and firm, silhouetted against the rolling hills in the painting hung over his bed. 
 
 `` Well good @ morning: to you too!'' I smirked as I spoke, a little stirred by the sheer absurdity of it all. 
 
 I wiped the morning haze out of my eyes and entered run level 3. William looked different. Gone were the familiar features he normally presented, in their place were an array of moods and emotion based prompts. 
 
 `` What the 0100100101010111001010100101010111?'' I bleeped my speech with binary. 
 
 William did n't flicker, or if he did I certainly could n't say. I studied him for a moment. Near the bottom left of his dysfunctional array I spied an element that seemed familiar. I touched it. 
 
 `` Linus, my man. Good morning!'' 
 
 I sat back on my bed. William had returned to normal. Still, something was off, I just could n't quite put my finger on it.
