[ WP ] A wizard , a thief , a bard , and an Orc are thrown into the same prison cell . They begin to swap stories as they have nothing else to do .

`` So, all I was trying to do is take the elf-girl's purse, pilfer a coin or two, leave it back, and head off to breakfast...'' began the Thief. 
 
 `` Oh, not the goddamn elf story again. How many times do I have to hear you repeat this. I ought' blast your fucking head in and beat you with it!'' the Wizard interrupted. 
 
 `` Gentlemen, gentlemen, please! We're all prisoners here, why, we should try to get along... Now tell me, what do you all think of this new diddy I came up with,'' the Bard strummed his lyre, releasing a sweet tune for the ears to hear. 
 
 `` HRNNGRGH URGA LORGA BLARGH,'' came the ugly, green monster in the room. 
 
 `` Well-put, Mr. Orc. Well-put indeed!'' the instrument continued to play, filling the room with a calm, enchanting melody. 
 
 The Thief sighed, tossing another card down on the table. The four had been stuck inside Blackmont prison for the past week and a half. Asides from trying to kill each other in their sleeps, they'd often past the times playing cards and dice. 
 
 Surprisingly enough, Mr. Orc would often win these little games of Go-Fish and collect the prize pool of bread crumbs and the mattress each night. 
 
 This left the Wizard rather grumpy in the morning and kept the Bard up at night creating new sleepy tunes that caused the other two humans to drift away into slumber on cold, shit-smeared floors. 
 
 `` Anyone got any fours?'' asked the Wizard. 
 
 `` Nope, go fis- OH FUCK!'' the Thief saw the wooden game table draw closer and closer into his face until he realized that the Wizard was actually slamming his head into the table with a vicious fury. 
 
 **SMACK! ** 
 
 The Thief yelped in pain, clutching his bleeding forehead in his thin, wiry fingers. His ears felt a sharp sting as the Bard scraped apart one of his playing strings in response to the sudden shock. Moreso, the humans' noses were all suddenly filled with the sickening musk of the Orc's terrible breath, expelled into the air by a burst of explosive laughter. 
 
 `` MUAHAHAHA. HOOMAN FACE GO BANG INTO TABLE LIKE LITTLE BABY GIRL!'' 
 
 `` What?!'' the Thief piped up, picking himself up and making his way over to the sink. The grimy cold water soaked his hands and flesh with a sticky sensation. 
 
 `` Nothing, nothing,'' the Bard urged him to calm. `` Anyway, my turn... Anyone happen to have a two?'' 
 
 The Wizard tossed in a card and grumbled. 
 
 It was just another normal evening in a little prison in Blackmont, the dungeon-city filled with cutpurses, murderers, rapists, and giant psychopaths who hardly speak English. In other words, just another city.
