[ WP ] Write a story about a train ride .

`` It's bullshit, man. You got the TSA and homeland security all over the airports. Who's watching the trains, huh? As often as the two of us ride this rail. What's to stop some terrorist from blowing *us* to bits? We're sitting ducks.'' 
 
 `` The locomotive is an essential and irreplacable instrument of our economy, even today. The railroads are definitely covered. At the very least we're covered by proxy. Aamira. Do n't sweat it.'' 
 
 `` Oh, the railroads are covered, that's comforting. I'm sorry, did you see any diamond filled freight cars attached to our train this morning? For fucks sake... uh, dude! This rail has n't even offered first class cabs for at least 3 or 4 years!'' 
 
 *all the time we've spent on these tracks together. Still does n't know my name. It's fucking Jack for fucks sake. * 
 
 `` First class was a ripoff anyway.'' 
 
 `` You're godamn right it was!'' 
 
 *She can knock off the names of every single Monsanto and Goldman Sachs Executive at the drop of a hat. But, Jack, oh no. Jack is too much too remember for Aamira. * 
 
 `` Let me tell you something else. You know what. Jack...'' 
 
 *Holy shit. She does know it* 
 
 `` *Ahem. * Pardon me. Jack shit.That's all it would take. That's all it would takr for someone to bust that door down right now...'' 
 
 *god damnet* 
 
 `` Aaamira! We're going over a hundred MPH!'' 
 
 `` Irrelevant! You think terrorist do n't have suicide drones? And where's the security? Flight attendant will slice your tit off for saying a word that even sounds like bomb! When do we ever even see our train guy? I'll bet I could start yelling bomb right now and nothing would happen.'' 
 
 *please do n't star yelling b-* 
 
 `` I HAVE A BOMB. AND I'M GOING TO BLOW UP THIS TRAIN! BOMB! BOMB! TRAINBOMB! BOMBTRAIN!'' 
 
 `` You're going to piss off the Steward.'' 
 
 `` Oh, fuck Stewart. That guy's an ass hole. Always sneaking up on us! BOMB! BOMB! BOMB!'' 
 
 `` Ms. Abdella! Could you please stop yelling bomb! Thursdays like this, you catch me and damn near every other crew member at the tail end of a double-and-a- half, we've been riding all night ya know and... Morning, Jack...'' 
 
 `` Morning, Sir.'' Jack replied. 
 
 `` Well, then riddle me this, Stewart, you lanky old bitch.'' 
 
 `` Miss Abdella for the 100th time my name is not...'' 
 
 `` Do n't interrupt me, Stewart. Now while you and the rest of the butt budies who operate this shit heep are sleeping off that double, who's watching us? Hm. The passengers?'' 
 
 `` Miss Abdella, you've been riding this train for years and have never hesitated to help yourself to any accomodation. In fact, we rather appreciate your independence in that capacity.'' 
 
 `` And what if I did have a bomb, Stewart? Where's the train Air Marshall? Are you willing to throw your body on top of a crazed suicide bomber to save the rest of us? I know I'm not. So what do we do?'' 
 
 Somehow, Jack felt suddenly intrigued. `` Train Air Marshall, Aamira? Really? She makes a good point though, sir. Are we at all prepared to handle any type of secuirty breach whatsoever?'' 
 
 `` No. We are not. Not in the least. Not at all. A toddler could take this train over.'' 
 
 `` Well gee, Stewart,'' Aamira began `` do n't you you think we oughta have some type of plan?'' 
 
 `` For what?'' The Steward replied. 
 
 `` For when a suicide bomber walks through that fucking do-!'' 
 
 `` *Frankly, Aamira. * Jack. If by the grace of God some confused and obviously lost suicide bomber made his way onto this speeding locomotive, then managed to bust down that steel door, and enter this car without being ripped off the vessel by the force of the wind alone. Not only would I do him thr courtesy of closing the door behind him, I'd probably suck his dick before he hit that trigger. Who gives a shit? I know you two do n't.'' 
 
 `` Alright, you got me there, Stewart.'' Said Aamirah. 
 
 Jack let out a long disconcerted sigh. He'd be fantasizing about getting blown to bits the whole day now. ``... yeah... Good talk, Stewart.'' Jack replied. He saw his limbs being blown to each corner of the car in his mind. And while Aamira had come uninvited into this fantasy, Jack chuckled to himself when she was left barely alive by the blast; only to have one of his recently dismemebered feet deliver the finishing blow. Right between the eyes. Aamira hated feet, too. 
 
 Quite cozy now, Jack sunk into his seat. He felt like mud. 
 
 `` Ech. I have n't given a blowjob in years. It's so gross.'' Aamira added.
