[ WP ] Write the superhero origin story of your username

Four and a half acres of soveriegn US territory cruising the oceans all over the world. Five thousand souls each with their own perspective doing daily task keeping the homeland safe. And here i sit in my shop browsing reddit. Made the mistake one day of loging in with my main account. Forgot that i had sub'd to just about ever NSFW sub there was, GoneWild, asainGW, BlackGW... the list goes on. Even some taboo stuff just to keep things interesting. Things like westernHentai, kikPenpals, DirtyR4r.... The govt pays alot of money to train me and make me the best sailor there is ( coughcough ). And they dont appreciate me spending my off duty hours browsing the gifts of other redditors. 
 
 I just logged in once. That was all it took. Next thing i know i was standing in front of some needle dick pencil pusher whose parents could afford to send him to college. But you could tell he wasnt made for the military. He was there to serve his term and GTFO. The ADP officer Clearly saw this was a minor mistake considering i didnt purple any of the NSWF links, But the thumbnails were still visable. I was in some deepwater. I was looking for a saved link for a piece of equipment i work. It had the full drawings and specs. The whole shebang. I needed those drawings so the MR's could create a part from scratch to fix a vital piece of equipment. 
 
 After 3 days of them browsing ever link i clicked on and every message i sent....mostly them just looking to fuck me over and send me to mast even though i wasnt lying. They made me sign a `` dont do this again or we will fuck you'' agreement also called a page 13. 
 
 In the end i actually got an award for my hard work and dedication to keeping the ship on mission during critical events. Saving the navy several thousand dollars and allowing them to continue their blah blah blah. Not all heros wear capes. Sometimes we just wear coveralls, talk shit to fellow snipes and browse reddit.
