[ WP ] Write about a great train robbery - but in any genre other than Western .

`` When's it gon na show up Pa?'' my eldest son Nathanial whined for perhaps the third time in as many minutes. I glanced up from the whittling I was doing on a piece of bark with a patient glare and an exasperated sigh `` It'll get here when it gets here, and if I hear yea yammerin about it again I'll whap you upside the head, unnersand now?'' I state with a more than slight undercurrent of annoyance in my voice. I glanced over at my youngest son Ezekiel as he stood leaning against a tree, eating some apple slices and raised an eyebrow at the look of amusement on his face as he silently chewed. `` And you wipe that grin offa yer face! Smart or not, you'll get a whap yurself!'' I drawled, quite agitated at this point. 
 
 It was n't just Nathanial's whining that was getting to me. It was the that was bothering me. It was late, far later than it should have been. We'd been camped out in the pass for a good three weeks now for what was supposed to only be a two week wait. `` I tells you, if them dang Hoffen boys ah sprung their end of the trap too early and scared it away there's gon na be hell and high water to pay for this waste ah time.'' my daughter Jessie said from where she sat next to her HORSE, petting it's flank gently. With a growl I tossed my knife into a piece of wood at my feet as I took to my feet `` Now do n't y'all start too! He's bad enough!'' I said gesturing at Nathanial, while ignoring the whine from that direction. 
 
 She gave a nonchalant shrug as she petted the thing, getting a shiver from it, `` I'm juss sayin that if they done screwed up and we miss our load o metals, I'm gon na take it outta their teeth!''. I shake my head a bit at that `` Not that bad of an idea tah be honest, they always had a fancy for shiny teeth.'' I said with a chuckle before some motion off to the side caught my eye. Quick as a flash I turned and drew my old Peacemaker from the leather holster at my side and fired off a round. The loud spang of the bullet as it struck a stone and wizzed off into the distance gave evidence to my failure to hit the small fuzzy animal that had disappeared back into it's hole. I cursed a bit as I flipped the pistol around and put it back in my holster. `` Paaaa, why do you have to use that thing? It's so old and loud! You're not even a good shot with it!'' Nathanial whined to me. 
 
 With a growl I turned to face my son, my hand on my pistol as I thought to myself'Well, I got a spare...', as I opened my mouth to castigate him some more when a loud shrill whistle reverberated through the canyon. `` The train Pa!'' Nathanial cried out. In a moment, my anger was gone and I pointed to Jessie `` Jess! The HORSEs!'' I cried out as Ezekiel and I rushed to clean up our gear from the camp site. Jessie came running over leading the HORSEs, REINS tight in her hand from the excitement. As I hurriedly threw our gear in a sack and tossed it at a hole in a nearby tree I asked Ezekial `` You got the explosives all set just like I said?'' and my handsomest son gave a grin of perfect teeth as he finally spoke `` I sure did, set up next to some niiice big rocks, ready to spill over the tracks.''. I clapped him on the shoulder as we ran to meet Jessie, `` Good boy lad!'' I declared with pride as I grabbed the REINS to my HORSE from Jessie. 
 
 `` Mount up y'all! We got ta get this train quick!'' I barked out and squeezed the warm black leather as I stood next to my HORSE. The Remote External Interface for Nanite Swarms device quickly registered my identity and beeped once as I leaned against my HORSE, pressing my body firmly into it. The Heuristically Organized Recombinant Swarm Equipment was a versatile device, useful to any farmhand or bandit family and I grinned as I felt its sub-components ooze around my body, bringing me into its full embrace. I closed my eyes and held my breath for a moment as the metal flowed over my head. When I resumed breathing and opened my eyes I grinned as I read the status display of my HORSE, all systems green. `` Alright then! Let's get after them!'' I shouted as I kicked my feet back, the heels of my boots triggering the thruster systems and as a group we rocketed over the terrain towards the cliff edge we had been near. I could hear Jessie letting out a whooping cry as we shot straight out into empty space. 
 
 The holoshield covering the farming module of our home flickered briefly as we broke through its boundary before re-assuming the visual shape of just another sizable rock. I pulled up my map and stared at the tracks of the train with a grin as I glanced over at the little chat window for Ezekiel `` Ezekiel, set em off!'' I ordered, the excitement getting my old ticker really going! `` Sure thing Pa!'' he declared and we watched in anticipation as six bright flashes of light appeared ahead, signalling the demise of six nice big boulders and the birth of many thousands of smaller ones. I watched in anticipation as all that mass spread out in all directions, but a large percentage converging from all sides on the projected hyperspace tracks of the train. `` Old man Jenkins better have got dem tracks right!'' I could n't help but mutter, thinking about how much we'd had to trade for the info. `` Relax Pa, he got them direct from their flight plan at Dallas Central, you know how much of a stickler those big city folks are for'procedure'.'' Jessie stated over the comm. 
 
 I grunted and waited for several long moments when suddenly Nathanial cried out `` Pa! Look! ``, right as sparks began flying between the rocks in the center of the converging formation. A grin crossed my face as I saw the starfield bend and bulge in torment amidst all that lightning before finally the Katy Komet freight train burst out of hyperspace in the spectacular fashion of a mass imbalance. The bulbous nose of the tender came visible first, plowing the rocky debris out of the way even as the massed energies lashed at its cowcatcher, followed by cart after cart of freight. For just a moment it looked like the Katy Komet's cowcatcher was going to successfully blast through, but then with a dull flash I knew the device, originally meant for small amounts of space debris and gasses, had been defeated. Large gashes appeared in the tenders hull as the rocks slammed into it. 
 
 It was breathtaking to watch, seeing this behemoth run the gauntlet, but it never really stood a chance. After a few more seconds with a bright flash and a crackle of static caused by a critical failure on one of the drive reactors of the Katy Komet, the train bent hard and whip cracked the freight cars. `` WOOOOEEEE! Get after em!'' I cried out as I kicked my HORSE into high gear, burning fuel like nobodies business as we chased after the loose cars, ignoring the Katy Komet as it finally passed through the debris field and began righting itself. The occasional burst of weapons fire issued forth from the tender, but was of no consequence to us. We knew we could n't take on that beast as we were. Besides, I could already see the telltale blurring of the starfield in front of the tender as the Katy Komet spooled her hyperspace drives to jump off again, leaving nothing but gasses and the loose cars in its wake. 
 
 With a cry of exultation we approached the freight cars, flipping end over end at various speeds. `` Lassos!'' I declared and spun my right hand in a circle above my head before flicking it forward. The HORSE beeped in acknowledgement as the subcomponents formed into a Lasso Corporation early model tractor beam emitter. I grinned with pride as I saw the orange/yellow glow of four beams encircle four different freight cars. `` Lets get outta here!'' I declared and turned my HORSE around with a jerk to the REINS and set us off back towards our home, the SS Crabapple Farmstead. 
 
 Several minutes later we set the containers down inside the freight area of the Crabapple and I stood proudly as my children congratulated themselves. `` Now hold up a second, unlock this one here and lets make sure we got the goods.'' I said, quite pleased with myself. Ezekiel and Jessie went up to the front panel and worked their magic on it for a few moments before with a loud clang and hiss, the doors began to open. Lights along the corners of the ceiling flicked on revealing clumped piles of various ingots, disturbed from its orderly stacks by the previous flipping of the freight car. `` Lithium-Oxide, Platinum, Uranium, it's all here Pa!'' Ezekiel declared as he looked over it with a scanner. 
 
 Nathanial wooped in celebration and went inside to stand on the pile made of mostly gold ingots. `` We did it Pa!'' he declared loudly. I grinned and opened my mouth to say something when with a shriek of scraping metal the pile in the back of the container shifted and shuddered as something rose from beneath it. `` COWBOY!'' Ezekiel declared and ducked back out of the container `` Nathanial get outta there!'' he shouted in fear as his brother turned and stared wide eyed as the Combat Operations Weapon - Basic Outpost Y-Variant shook off the ingots and began deploying its threshing claws as its star shaped gun pods slid open on either side of the brim of its conical top. To my son's credit, he was quick on the draw and opened fire with his plasma pistol. The green bursts of superheated copper simply washed over the shields of the robot uselessly slagging some of the ingots nearby without damaging the COWBOY at all. The gun pods glowed for just an instant before a loud boom reverberated through the room and the robot slowly sank down on its legs, a neat hole in its polymer skin showing a few sparks within. 
 
 Nathanial turned around in confusion and stared at me as I smirked and blew the smoke out of the barrel of my Peacemaker before flipping it around on my finger and holstering it. `` And THAT is why I carry this old thing.'' I declared in satisfaction.
