[ WP ] Cancer is now a transmissible disease .

I love everyone. I like it when people are with me, and they seem to like me back. The only problem is that when people are with me for too long, they get cancer. Let me start from the beginning. 
 
 Ever since I was born I was a loner. No-one hung out with me, I would just move around doing nothing. Eventually, after a reaallllyyy long time I managed to get a few friends, they were n't much but whatever. This circle of friends slowly got bigger, we would pretty much hang out all the time and not a moment would go by when I did n't have a friend around. 
 
 Not all my friends get along with each other, sometimes fights start and I try to break them up but I ca n't really do much. Before long I must have gotten pretty popular because my friend group grew *exponentially* and I was always with people and I loved all of them. 
 
 Back to the cancer. I always had an effect on my friends, I give them gifts that they show each other and everyone's happy. I always give out as much stuff as people want, some people use it for their homes and some use it on themselves. Some people get greedy though, and take too much. This gives them cancer. 
 
 I try to help everyone, but you ca n't do much when you're a giant ball of flaming gas.
