[ WP ] Turns out the human body IS intelligently design , only by the lowest bidder on an alien planet 10,000 years ago . Describe the company and mess up that led to the worst standards in designs in the human body .

`` Ladies and Gentlemen, the Intergalactic Contract Council has reached a decision regarding planet SS-3E,'' the Council Chairman said into the microphone, repeatedly rapping his gavel with his bottom left arm. His top left arm was busy flipping through the council's notes from the previous 27 hours of deliberation. 
 
 Once the swarming hearing room had quieted down, the attention came to the two tables at the front of the room. Seated at the tables were representatives from TerraCorp and Lifex, rivaling companies seeking out the contract for the H.U.M.A.N Project. The H.U.M.A.N. Project was set to create an entirely new species on planet SS-3E, one that would hopefully overcome the shortcomings of the previous A.P.E. Project. 
 
 `` Mr. Steventon,'' said the Chairman, looking over his glasses to the alien seated at the left table, `` can you confirm for the council one final time that you are the legal representative for TerraCorp on the matters of intergalactic contracts?'' 
 
 `` That is correct,'' said Steventon, flashing a smile consisting of three dazzling rows of sparkling teeth. Well-dressed in his suit of the finest Darathromitian Wool, he had maintained an air of professionalism during the full length of the hearing. 
 
 The same question was asked of the representative from Lifex, Mr. Lark. 
 
 `` Erm, yes I am,'' he replied meagerly. Not looking quite as professional as Mr. Steventon, Mr. Lark was dressed in what was once his nicest white collared shirt, which was now spotted with coffee and sweat stains from the 27 hours spent in the hearing room. 
 
 `` Excellent,'' said the Chairman, `` the council is excited to announce that the H.U.M.A.N. project has been awarded to Lifex Corporation, due to the extremely conservative estimate provided by the company.'' 
 
 It was at this particular moment that Mr. Steventon's face, normally a nice rosy color from the sun on his home planet, turned a particularly dark shade of crimson. The rest of the room erupted in chatter. 
 
 `` Objection!'' He yelled, trying to be heard over the collective shock from the gallery. `` TerraCorp has provided a far superior design than that of Lifex! Ours is designed to work with the plant life that WE have already put on that planet, using the energy provided from the star that SS-3E orbits! Lifex's design eats OUR plant life product for energy for Chrissakes! We've had this photosynthetic capability for centuries, but they're refusing to move forward and attacking us instead!'' He appeared to be losing his perpetual air of professionalism, gesturing violently at Mr. Lark. Mr. Lark still had n't quite processed what the Chairman had said, still looking a bit shocked. 
 
 `` Mr. Steventon...'' started the Chairman. 
 
 `` Oh no, I'm not finished.'' Steventon interrupted. `` Lifex's design has so many flaws, I could go for 27 *more* hours just listing them. I mean, come on, the product has to charge for 8 hours a day just to function. 8 HOURS. That's a ludicrous proposition, and if anyone else had even come close to suggesting it, they would have been shot out into space without a suit!'' Green spit had begun to fly from his mouth, and his hand gestures had begun to get even wilder ( quite impressive considering he had four hands to gesture with ). 
 
 `` Even if that were n't enough, the processing power contained in their product is variable to a huge degree upon reproduction. Do you know how dangerous an unintelligent unit of this product can be, Mr. Chairman? Because I'm beginning to think you do n't quite understand! Your council is dooming this species with this decision, and when push comes to shove, *you* will be responsible for the destruction of planet SS-3E.'' He froze, wild-eyed, with his accusatory fingers still pointed at the chairman. Mr. Lark looked at his feet, doing his best not to laugh at Mr. Steventons outrageous yet completely justified rant. 
 
 `` We understand your concern, Mr. Steventon.'' the Chairman stated coolly, `` but the intergalactic budget is- please put your hands down, Mr. Steventon'' -Steventon lowered his pointing fingers- `` the intergalactic budget is our first concern in this matter. While the creation of new species is essential to the intergalactic economy, we've been over budget for the past 25,000 years, and we are doing our best to make sure that it does n't happen again this year. We would like to congratulate Lifex on receiving this contract, and we hope that in 200,000 years when the council reviews the project we will find it to be a great success. Any formal complaints or appeals can be filed with the Department of Intergalactic Complaints and Kommerce'' 
 
 Mr. Steventon furiously began cleaning up his papers and various notepads, while Mr. Lark began gingerly doing the same, hoping to not set off another explosion from Mr. Steventon. 
 
 The Chairman continued, `` This case is closed, and the council will now move on to case SS-4M, on the subject of the installation of the M.A.R.S. program...''
