Major Tom After Realizing His Fate [ WP ]

*'' System power critical, life support systems shut down in T minus 5-'' * 
 We are such strange creatures, humans. Even as the adrenaline hits and my hands go into over-drive, there is still this cool, detached part of me noticing how I'm reacting. Savoring all the little ironies and regrets as they hit me. My habit in'Nam of flying un-powered for the last few miles to my targets that earned me both an Air Force Cross and an invite from NASA. The shame of how I switched out the test results when I saw that Bill had a better shot than I did, and all the other sins, small and large that I had yet to atone for. 
 *'' 4-'' * 
 It was hard to reach for the panels now. With the engines stuck in a hard burn the acceleration gave the capsule a strange gravity as the fuel that was supposed to pull me down out of orbit instead threw me around the earth faster, even as the rest of the systems started to shut down. I thought about Kathy. She hated this job of mine almost as much as she had hated my vices. The drinking that left me surly, and the woman that left her humiliated. Still for some reason, she dug in. Refused to give up, and showed me how to make myself the kind of man that might one day deserve her. She loved me with a fierceness. We were going to start trying for kids when I... 
 *'' 3-'' * 
 I imagine ground control is getting pretty nervous by now. Wish I could radio back... something, but that was one of the first things to go. I'm not even sure what I think I'm going to do, I'm just pushing buttons to make myself feel better at this point. Might as well suck my thumb. I let my hands drop and look up, just in time to see the moon rise around the earth. Now there's something to laugh about. I'm about to be the furthest traveled human being in history. Slung out of earth orbit, just passed the moon and who knows how much further. A perfectly preserved specimen of American Male for some distant alien race to find eons from now. Or more likely eventually orbited back around to be warmed up by the sun for a very brief fireworks show. 
 
 Hmm should n't there have been a `` 2'' by now? 
 
 Ah. Did n't quite make it to that point. Everything inside is dark now, and the temperature is definitely dropping fast. Now was as good a test of my humanism as any. Did I want to try a little last minute conversion? Who knows right?.... Ah hell, who am I gon na try to impress here, no one is gon na recover me, and I'm not gon na be able to tell anyone. I had long decided that any creator that bothered to give a damn about us apes would n't have let me do any of those horrible things in the war. 
 
 Speaking of that shit hole country, I could just make out Vietnam above me, surrounded by that deep, beautiful blue. It's hard to describe how blue the planet is from up here, it really is 
 
 so very blue.
