[ WP ] A serum is invented that brings you closer to God when injected

I think I was about 25 when I first tried Soma. I had a friend who made a lot of money with some stupid fucking phone game- you know the ones, tap your screen until it breaks and YOU WIN! Addictive as hell. Now *that* guy is a drug dealer. We were all trying it at his new digs, some split-level money-box he bought with his ill-gotten gains. He was always one of those guys living on the edge- high as a kite programming for four days straight, just trying to make the next big thing. Well this time he did it, and we were celebrating, and he wanted the best of the best, so he got it. 
 
 Soma made a small splash in the world of archaelogy at first when they finally identified it after centuries of curiosity. Some kind of plant, a vine, that when consumed made you have religious visions. They say the Vedas were written by guys off their faces on the stuff, throwing butter into fires and watching the Gods come down in flaming chariots to carry them off to Heaven as long as the reverie to last. 
 
 I've been using Soma for 15 years. Well,'using' is a strong word. A single dose of soma costs upwards of a million dollars, which means that I've used it five times in those 15 years, although I never stopped thinking about it. Considering it's a pharmaceutical extract made from an extinct species revived less than a decade ago in a single university agricultural laboratory, the price tag is to be expected. Especially with shit *this* good. I've tried everything, damn-near, to get that same high again. Crack, meth, heroin, peyote, goddamn LSD, not even close. I've sucked chem professor's dicks just to get things you've never heard of, and god-knows I have n't even come close so far. I've made and spent entire fortunes on this yen, the need to hear that voice again. 
 
 Have you ever used Soma? Of course you have n't. You're a good person. Well, let me tell you, the newspapers do n't lie. It's the best high in the world. It depends on what you believe, or what you do n't believe but deep down fear to be true, I suppose. Me, when I was twenty five, a fallen Catholic who read too much? Do you know what the Host of the Seraphim sounds like? Do you know what it feels like when Elohim himself sitting down cross-legged, and extending his palm, calls you Israel, his chosen? 
 
 Have you ever tasted the Blood of Christ fresh from his palms? Can you imagine how sweet that is? Do you know what the Spheritot looks like in the flesh? Have you seen the infinite Buddhas of the infinite Heavens? Have you drank the water of the Pure Land, and given praise to Amida herself, and kissed her perfumed feet? 
 
 Do you know what Vishnu smells like? What Krishna's rippling muscles feel like as he lifts a mountain over his head? Have you ever been fucked by Shiva? Have you seen the Dao as it emanates the Ying and Yang, as Qi condenses by its design into divine matter? Have you seen Osiris rise from the Nile, alive? 
 
 Have you ever heard a quiet voice, deep down in your fucked up, no-good, home-wrecker, hurry-up-and-die shit-for-brains head whisper to you and say, `` I am here, do not cry anymore''? Hear it say, `` I forgive you, Daniel, for I love you''? 
 
 Did I say one million? It used to be one million. Good times, one million is a lot easier to come by. I guess the uni must have gotten shut down? This last hit cost me fourteen million dollars. You wo n't believe the things I've done and seen to get it. I fucked, robbed, sold and murdered my way across the entirely world, I've sinned on every continent, just for this. And I'd do it all again, to hold this in my hand now, this little precious slice of Heaven, this Balm of Gilead. I'm going to kill myself tonight, communing with the divine. The wheels of fire will come down and carry me away forever. I'm going to take it all at once and never come back. 
 
 I love you mom. I'm sorry you hurt so much to push out such a worthless son. I did n't mean to hurt anybody, except I guess for when I did. I'll put in a good word for you all Up There, and I guess I'll see you soon. 
 
 I love you. Bye. 
 
 *click*
