[ WP ] You are a demon who was chosen to blend in with humanity and collect souls . What you do n't know is you specifically were chosen because you are n't very good at being a demon and Hell did n't want to deal with you anymore . You room with a necromancer who goes by the name Dave . He is annoying .

“ Damn you Dave! Damn you straight back to Home ” 
 
 He was doing it again. The dark lord had given me my infernal mission, to bring him 500 righteous souls and stop them joining the armies of heaven. Here I was about to harvest 3 new ones and Dave resurrects them. He ’ s always doing this, beating me to the punch. 
 
 “ Why do you need more zombies? What ’ s wrong with you? ” I roared at him, my claws twitched eager to rend him limb from limb. 
 
 “ Have you seen the dishes? They ’ re piling up man someone ’ s got to clean them and only one of us appears to have a job. ” 
 
 That one hurt, I have to admit. A job would help me blend in but my glamour is poor, everyone gets uncomfortable around. Plus no matter what I do there ’ s always a faint smell of brimstone following me around. Besides, Dave considered himself a “ pro gamer ” that ’ s not a real job Dave! 
 
 “ Come on Dave, I ’ ve got to harvest 500 pure souls, I ’ ve got nothing so far. ” My voice had taken on a more whining candescence as I said that. I hated myself sometimes. 
 
 “ Hey, you didn ’ t kill them they ’ re fair game. Besides you ate the zombie I used for vacuuming. ” 
 
 I stared at the wreckage trying to work out how to take credit for this crash. I ’ d wanted to cause it, I really did. I was going to possess the driver and cause a massive pile up. Unfortunately while I was working up the nerve some little kids started throwing rocks over the bridge. But hey, the prince of darkness never said I had to kill all the souls myself, just collect them. Unfortunately Mr “ I only wear black because it matches my soul ” started casting and bound the souls to himself to resurrect later. 
 
 Depressed I wandered back to our apartment on the edge of town. We passed Old Mrs Sanchez as we walked up the stairs she flinched back from me, she could tell something was wrong but couldn ’ t place her finger on it, she wrinkled her nose and hurried down the stairs. 
 
 I ’ d considered breaking into her apartment and devouring her soul once, but she ’ d spent too much time around her amoral estranged husband when she was younger. Her soul was ruined, it would be like eating week old sushi. 
 
 We entered the apartment and I sighed, another night alone. It was succubus night down in the dark circle, my old watering hole, but I couldn ’ t return home, not without the souls. 
 
 “ Come on Dave, lets go cause some mayhem, you ’ ve got plenty of zombies I ’ ll even split the souls with you fifty-fifty ”. 
 
 “ Goddammit! ” I recoiled as he shouted the epithet “ I ’ ve told you already, I don ’ t kill people! Just turn them into mindless pawns to control as I see fit. It ’ s different. ” 
 
 He flopped onto the couch and commanded three zombies to grab a controller and join him for some co-op games Frustrated and tired I retreated to my room and grabbed by ducky blanket and went to sleep. 
 
 
 
 Back in the living room a fifth player connected to Daves Game. 
 
 “ 666LuciferNoScope has joined the game. ” Flashed up on Daves screen, a voice began to talk through his headset, it was soft and smooth, full of promise. The voice drew out its s ’ s adding a slightly sinister cast to its otherwise honeyed-voice. 
 
 “ How isss it ’ sss progresss? ” The voice asked. 
 
 “ Still at zero souls my lord. I stopped him from acquiring three today. He really is pathetic sir ” Dave replied 
 
 “ I know, that isss why he can not be allowed to return keep him there and our bargain will continue ” The voice promised. 
 
 “ So I ’ ll definitely win the Atlantic Open then? ” Dave asked, his voice perking up while he remained slouched. 
 
 “ Ass we agreed. The competition is being dealt with asss we sspeak. ” 
 
 “ And what about the rest of our deal? ” 
 
 “ Doritiosss has agreed to ssponssor you, your first ssshipment arrives next month. ” 
 
 “ You ’ re the best Lucy ” Dave replied, before jumping up in his seat shouting. “ Oh Come on! You were looking at my screen you little shit ” With a wave of his hand one of the zombies was reduced to dust. At a mental command another came over to take its place. 
 
 Back in its room the Demon pulled a pillow over its head. Dave was shouting again, this could go on all night “ Daves the worst ” It mumbled to itself “ One day, one day I ’ ll eat him, that ’ ll show him. ” 

