[ WP ] Write the letter that you always wanted to , but never did .

Dear Katie, 
 
 It feels strange to be sitting here writing this to you. Especially in the form of a letter, emails seem to be a way of life, but I have to say that watching my pen move over this page has a certain draw. 
 
 I never thought I would need to write a letter to you. In my mind you should be right here with me. If I close my eyes I can imagine that you're right beside me, our shoulders touching while we hold hands and enjoy each other's company. 
 
 Even in my imagination my hands are a bit sweaty, but you've always made me nervous Katie. I remember you used to worry about that, you would say `` just be your self. I'll love you anyway.'' I'm not sure I ever convinced you that I was being myself, the nervousness could n't be helped. I could n't stand the idea of hurting or disappointing you. Lot of good that does me now. 
 
 It took weeks to write this. Seeing your smiling face in my mind and sometimes barely remembering your voice hurt too much. When the pain was all I knew you were my life raft in the ocean. Now I just have to drown until the waters subside. 
 
 Know that I do n't blame you, special. Remember when I called you that all the time? Anyway, I really do n't. Everything was always intense between us. Amazing highs and amazing lows. I'm so glad you found someone that makes you happy. I used to tell you that as long as you were happy I would be as well. That's at least somewhat true. 
 
 I'll never date again, people tell me never is a long time but it's not the same. Who knew I would be a one woman man? But I am and I found and lost the only woman I'll ever want. Ever. 
 
 This could ramble on for a long time so I'll wrap things up. Know that I still love you, I never stopped. I do n't blame you for moving on. It sounds ridiculous but sometimes I hold out hope that our story is n't over. That somewhere down the line you'll love me again. Hah, pathetic. Be safe special. 
 
 P.S. I recently lost and then found the bracelet you made me senior year. It does n't fit anymore so it stays around the gear shift in my car. Love you always, Alex.
