[ WP ] Write a Freakazoid fanfic in which CandleJack is

So once upon a time, all the way back in 2003 or 4, Candlejack was feeling **PUNCH** let me finish you bondage-freak! Now where was I, ah yes he was feeling quite bored. People did n't fear him enough anymore so Candlejack was sad **KICK** I said let me finish goddamn it! Yeesh, some people am I right? Anyway he was feeling sad because people were all about that Japanese horror stuff, the Ring, Ju-on and the like, or if it was n't horror it was all serious with the Matrix and X-files and such. Nobody was afraid of him anymore. He had had some trouble recently with even getting people to say his name, Candlejack **SMACK** Now go sit in the corner and think about what you've done, it is very rude to interrupt people when they are in the middle of something. Kids these days, all white-hoods and robes, going around trying to kidnap writers. What is up with that? Anyway, since he had trouble getting people saying his name, he decided to try that internet thing that everybody always talked about. 
 
 He went to some Chinese web-weaving forum called 4Chan, a place which would most likely never amount to anything of importance, and decided to post some stuff in a few threads about Philistine throat singing as per usual, when he got an idea. Perhaps if he posted something saying''*Hey, ever heard of that Candlejack guy, heard he got trans*'' and people would maybe say his name. **BWAM** I said stay in the corner and do n't move you robed rope roper. It worked, and people said his name, he would come take them just as they were about to post, take them away mid-sentence and then post the unfinished reply. It was a success. People all over started saying his name, and with the end of Freakazoid there was nothing that could stop him. It spread like a wildfire and over the years Candlejack, do n't think I am not seeing what you're doing other there young man, do I have to get violent, huh? Did n't think so. Candlejack got thousands to say his name, successfully, capturing lots of mostly obese neckbeards-in-training and weaboos. And it is said that he still waits out there, on the forum boards and the strange places, in youtube comments or in reddit posts, he hides, he waits. He will catch you if you say his name. Most likely hogwash, like if I said candyman, candyman, candyman, candyman, candyman or bloody Mary, bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, supposedly that will summon tho 
 
''*HeiSmInetoTAKe.IaMTHEELdestAnDORIginalOfus... *'' 
 
 *No way lady, I got him first, sure maybe he was a little rough, but he is MINE! * 
 
 **You two better stop fighting, because I am going to kill that little shit right about now** 
 
''*oHNoyOUdonT.IstILLhaVENTforGOTTENaboutourengagEMENTCANDYMAN! YOUrAnoUTonME! *'' 
 
 **Damnit woman, do you have to do it right now, in front of the victim? I told you, I ai n't your Candyman, I am MY Candyman, understand? ** 
 
 *Well then, this is about to get ugly, better finish this guy's post and take him with me, sure he is an ass but when those two are fighting, oh boy I'll need a lot of rope for that, even he deserves better. -CJ out* 
 

