[ WP ] Find a random post on r/TIFU and make an explanation for the title without reading the post .

TIFU by putting hot sauce in places it does n't belong. 
 
 Okay, so to start, this happened 3 years ago. 
 
 So I'm a surgeon at a prominent hospital in NW America ( no I ca n't tell you where ). Now, I do n't know how many of you are doctors, but I'm sure you'll know it's hungry work. Unfortunately, you also do n't get breaks often due to being constantly called off etc etc. So you find ways to eat on the job. 
 
 I'm also something of an inventor. As such, I invented what I call the `` Drizzle & Dine''. Basically, they're IV tubes tied to my wrists which are attached to a tub of sauce on my back. Sure, it's uncomfortable, but when you do n't have time to find the condiment of your choice, you get used to it. 
 
 So on this particular day, I'm in the break room wolfing down a chilli dog. Now, I like my food hot and spicy, so on this day I have a tub of The Source Hot Sauce strapped to my back ( if you do n't know, The Source is well over 100 times hotter than typical jalapenos and 700 times hotter than Tabasco Pepper sauce ). So I've squirted some sauce on their and have just finished my meal when a nurse comes in and begs me to follow her. Apparently, some patient needs some emergency surgery due to severe cardiac tamponade ( basically, the sac surrounding his heart is filling with pus ) and she ca n't find any other surgeons free to help. 
 
 So I run down to Surgery to prep up whilst she gets the patient and brings him in ( overweight 46 year old male with known heart problems, including moderate atherosclerosis and a history of heart attacks ). Soon, surgery's underway as I slice into his body in an attempt to drain the pericardium ( the sac the heart's inside ) of pus. By the time it's done, I'm sweating and shaking from the chilli dog before. And unfortunately, whilst prepping for surgery I neglected to remove my `` Drizzle & Dine'' kit. So it happens that my scalpel accidentally clips the switch on my IV tube that releases sauce. 
 
 My wrists starts spraying hot sauce into this guys heart. Now, you all may see the slight problem here. The nurse did too, and tried to push me away, only for my arm to flail and spray her in the eyes with hot sauce. Apparently the switch is damaged, and the force at which the sauce is spraying out makes my arm flail. SO I end up spraying everyone in that room apart from myself in the eyes with hot sauce. By the time it's finished, the patient is dead from hot sauce burning into his heart and the entire surgery staff are completely blind and ( judging from how still some of them were ) likely unconscious or dead. 
 
 Now I'm in jail on involuntary manslaughter, assault and, according to the judge, `` being a f*cking retarded idiot''. The reason I've posted this now is that I've had a new cellmate move in, and I think he may have been a relative of the guy I sprayed hot sauce inside of, judging by how he shouted at me for killing his dad and how he's sharpening a shiv and glaring at me. I suppose the only plus side is I got to keep my `` Drizzle and Dime''. 
 
 TL; DR I sprayed hot sauce and blinded/killed about 8 people, and am gon na die tomorrow.
