[ WP ] After accidentally entering a bunch of gibberish in the web browser , you find yourself on what seems to be an alien version of Amazon .

*That is the LAST time I'm drinking, * Harry vowed as he quietly closed the front door and tripped on the coffee table. Numbing pain throbbed in his knees and he felt water in his mouth. His stomach churned. Harry shook his head violently and in an effort to stop it from spinning. 
 
 *Food, I need... a sandwich* Harry crept across the floorboards; avoiding the creaking board next to the sofa and stepping over another en route to the kitchen. He flicked the light switch on, waited for his eyes to adjust and made himself a sandwich. He flicked the light back off and sunk in the sofa in the dark living room, breathing deeply. 
 
 He turned his laptop on and the room glowed an eerie blue-white from the screen. Harry gobbled the sandwich as he loaded up his web browser and clumsily typed the address. 
 
 *A-mo-zone, * He slurred, struggling to focus on the keys. He pressed enter and screwed his nose up. He'd badly misspelt the web address. 
 
 A green and black screen with a single sentence. Harry narrowed his gaze to focus on the words. 
 
 *Enter species number*, He read the words several times and bit his bottom lip. He entered his email address and pressed enter. A pop up window appeared with four options and a tick box. 
 
 *Human-Uka hybrid, Human-Xeno Hybrid, Humaine, None of the above*, Harry clicked None of the above and a home page loaded. It looked just like Amazon's home page but the items were different. 
 
 Ray guns at 50 % off, tentacle cream, human costumes and more. Harry scanned the alien items with incredulity. He stopped as he noticed 25 % off Kindles, writing the other items off as a joke. 
 
 He clicked on the search bar and typed in `` Microwave''. He said the letters out loud as he typed them. The search took several seconds before a page opened. *Microwave transmitter? Microwave Evaporator? Microwave exoplat? * He clicked the exoplat item and the screen changed to bright green with black writing. 
 
 *Well, I'm clearly more drunk than I thought* Harry shook his head and closed his laptop, placing it on the edge of the sofa. 
 
 He stumbled into the kitchen, bashed into the kitchen counter and poured a glass of water. He struggled not to spill any down his front and quietly placed the glass on the sink, unaware of the eyes watching him outside. 
 
 **** 
 
 `` Yes Mr Denoar'' The creature nodded quickly, holding the device to his mouth. It perspired nervously and scratched its head, trying to block its pores. `` His searches on Amazon indicate he needs a microwave.'' 
 
 `` A microwave exoplat?'' 
 
 `` Yes sir, for his ship.'' The human wobbled out the kitchen holding his hands out for balance. `` This one is stumbling all over the place.'' 
 
 `` Why have we not been aware of this one?'' 
 
 `` New breed,'' The creature said quietly. 
 
 `` Gods of Amazon... are you sure?'' 
 
 `` Yes sir, it chose'None of the above' and entered an Earth email address.'' 
 
 `` This is worse than we thought...'' The voice trailed off `` Xeniur?'' 
 
 `` Yes sir?'' 
 
 `` Bring him in for extraction, unharmed and be careful.'' 
 
 `` Yes sir.'' 
 
 `` GLORY AMAZON!'' The creature saluted and the device evaporated into the air. 
 
 Xeniur took a deep breath and slid forward cautiously, opening the back door. It slid inside the house, and held the gun out, making sure it was set to stun. 
 
 `` Glory Amazon'' it quietly prayed as it followed Harry into the hallway. 

