[ WP ] The Deep Woods are a fearsome place , filled with screams and lights and terrible magic . But in the depths of the forest lives an ancient dragon who constructs all the sounds and sights to keep people away , because he just wants to be left alone .

`` Oh my— I really thought this was going to work!'' The Dragon scoffed. `` I had a good thing going for a while you know, but I ca n't have a 20 years of piece and quite around here! Nooooooo I have to—'' 
 
 *'' A British speaking Dragon? `` * I thought to myself. *'' You'd think a Dragon would sound a little more menacing than John Oliver...'' * I chuckled to myself. 
 
 `` And what's so funny? Hmm?'' The dragon had leaned in towards me, admiring my not so tasty looking skin. I was caught off guard; all I could do was look around. SO MUCH FREAKING GOLD. Gold throne. Gold fan. Gold Cieling ( Which apparently is a little faulty because it ca n't with stand the weight 155lb man ). 
 
 `` *Eh must be from all the water leaking in here; Whatever. * Hey man—'' 
 
 `` DO NOT CALL ME BY THE NAME OF YOUR NUISANCE OF A SPECIES CALLED MAN! I shall be referred to as Gilgalore The Mighty!'' The dragon puffed smoke through his nose and stuck out his chest with his hands on his hips in a mighty power pose. Personally I think he looked like a tool. A very large tool. 
 
 A very large orchestral electronic piano wrapped around from behind him. I continue: 
 
 `` Whatever dude, hey are you—'' 
 
 Gilga interrupts, `` MY NAME IS GILGALORE THE MIGHTY!!'' 
 
 `` Gilgadouche, no one cares. Hey you need to stop playing all these weird scary sounds, this is a really nice and beautiful forest and you're freightening everyone away'' I said. 
 
 `` Good, they are no good here anyways. As are you so good day.'' He crosses his arms and turns back to his piano to play his dumb tunes. 
 
 `` That's it?'' I ask? He plays a note out of key on his giant piano and The dragon pauses. He raises his small red T-Rex finger. 
 
 `` Actually....'' 
 
 And that's how this stupid daily journal thing started. The dragon encaged me and now I have to repair his stupid giantic Panasonic orchestral electronic piano when ever the damn thing craps out. Got ta find some way to occupy my time. 
 
 Do n't fuck with dragons.
