[ WP ] You are a pyrokinetic who tends to accidentally set things on fire when stressed . And today , you 're having a very bad day .

`` Gregory, the fridge is on fire and I suspect it has something with you,'' shouted the bald headed manager of the construction plant. 
 
 `` Yes sir,'' replied Jeffrey, in an accidentally proud voice. 
 
 `` *Dare* I ask why?'' 
 
 `` Well it started off with some slippery ice on the sidewalk'' 
 
 It had indeed started off with some slippery ice on the sidewalk, which had maliciously tripped Jeffrey over in the morning, causing him to lose his good mood much like a bespectacled man would lose his glasses, except Jeffrey had n't quite managed to find his good mood again. 
 
 Angrily he'd stumbled off to the office only to be struck by a sudden jolt of empathy mid way. The empathy stubbornly guided him to the office kitchen in search of a bag of salt, which he promptly carried to the place where the incident had taken place. 
 
 Just as he was about to open the bag though, he was hit by an epiphany. Being the pyrokinetic he was, perhaps he could melt the ice. The process would be a lot quicker. Calmly, as if he had done it his own life, he placed his hands on the ice and closed his eyes. 
 
 Nothing. 
 
 `` Only when I do n't want things to set on fire...,'' he grumbled. 
 
 As if he had recited a prophecy, the bag of salt burst right into flames as he picked it up. A mountain of salt spilled out onto the road. The road next to the ice infested pavement. 
 
 Jeffrey facepalmed aggressively, knocking the empathy out of his head. 
 
 The walk back to work was a sad one indeed. It only became sadder when the door knob set itself on fire as he tried to enter the office. And then a bit more when the fire extinguisher set on fire. The fridge soon followed. 
 
 `` You expect me to believe all that?,'' The manager asked as Jeffrey finished explaining 
 
 He continued before Jeffrey could answer, `` Forget it. I'll just fix it myself'' 
 
 `` That's why you're the boss,'' Jeffrey laughed as he made the mistake of patting the bald man on his back. 
 
 They decorated the urn with the manager's ashes on the break room cabinet.
