[ WP ] When you die , you do n't go to the afterlife of you 're religion , you go to the afterlife of the religion whose tenets you followed most closely , knowingly or not .

`` Heaven? I'm sorry, but what the Hell? ``, you half-shouted when I gave you the news. 
 
 `` Welcome to your home for the rest of eternity.'' I intoned for the thousandth-or-so time that day, beaming. It never got old. Uriel had sometimes expressed moderate boredom, even tricking new entries in fun little ways upon their arrival. A hearty laugh was invariably shared by all parties involved. A montage of his whimsical welcomes was archived for later enjoyment; they resurged in popularity every decade or so. 
 
 But I never grow tired of it. I do n't know, it's heartwarming. 
 
 `` I do n't know what I disbelieve more; that Heaven exists, or that I made it.'' Not a new statement; but then again, what is, after this long? 
 
 `` You were -- are, a good man. You helped people: gave blood, donated to charity, and forgave people who wronged you. You usually did all you could to create more good than bad and destroy more bad than good.'' 
 
 `` Usually?'' 
 
 `` Only human.'' I allowed myself a playful smirk. 
 
 `` Still: I was n't a believer. Not since my teen years. Not by a long shot.'' 
 
 `` Does n't matter; you qualified, quite easily. You were a good person, and qualified for Heaven.'' 
 
 `` So it does n't matter what I believed, or did n't believe?'' 
 
 `` Now, what kind of perfect God cares about something so petty? ``, I asked. Your face betrayed that you had never really thought of that. So few do, it seems. 
 
 `` So I guess I know now that Christianity is the one that got it right.'' 
 
 Here came the part that, like giving people the good news never got old, never got any simpler or easily swallowed. So much of human thinking is focused on wrong-or-right, good-or-bad, black-or-white. 
 
 `` Well, it's not exactly that cut-and-dry. Just about all of them are'right', in a way. All the heavens of the major religions exist, and depending on how you live, you go to the Heaven which is right for you.'' 
 
 `` What're the criteria for each?'' 
 
 `` Well, it's complicated, but it's all about which virtues you most elegantly and thoroughly display. Christianity's is forgiveness, Judaism has integrity, Buddhism's is serenity, For Islam it's supplication to higher purpose, the list goes on.'' 
 
 `` There's all kinds of gods? Which one's the boss, the'Zeus'? Oh man, is it Zeus? ``, you then asked. 
 
 `` Nono, just one, as far as I know. The different religions are n't different Gods, or competing views of what morality is, they're different ways of being moral. To make it to a Heaven, you have to be a good person. Full stop. Which one is determined by how you were good, not how good you were. As such, they're much more similar to cities within a nation that to rival nations.'' 
 
 You stood for a second in silence, absorbing this new knowledge. Your next utterance was a simple, ``... Huh.'' 
 
 I stepped back from the entrance, motioned you in. `` Welcome home. The most immediate benefit to you, I'll bet, will be the buffet. Nothing you do n't or wo n't like will be visible to you, nothing runs out, it's great. You're a'foody', right?''
