[ WP ] You have been selected from a lottery of billions to be the first human to hear an extraterrestrial orchestra play , after first contact has been made with intelligent life .

`` And now,'' said the conductor, her tentacled arms raised, `` in recognition of our new friends in the planet of Ee-arth, the Zorblaxian Symphony Orchestra and choir will perform what our scientists have gathered to be the Planetary Anthem of their people.'' 
 
 What? What possible piece could she be referring to? The Star Spangled Banner? It could n't be. We had made it very clear that the Earth did not have a Supreme Leader, so why would they choose any one country's anthem over another? 
 
 An innocuous statement from one of the officials at the briefing came back to me. The Zorblaxians had known of our presence in advance, by listening to radio broadcasts. Which would mean that whatever our radios were playing at the time was essentially our species' greeting to the rest of the universe... 
 
 The aliens gathered their instruments in their claws, tentacles and energy-based appendages. The conducter ignited her laser baton. The entire crowd stood still as they played th first measure. 
 
 I laid my head in my arms in embarassment. I supposed this was better than starting out with intergalactic war, but not by much. Slowly I looked back up just in time to watch the choir enter: 
 
 `` This hit, that ice cold 
 Michelle Pfieffer, that white gold, 
 This one, for them hood girls, 
 Them good girls, straight masterpieces...'' 

