[ WP ] You are a schizophrenic maddeningly in love with the man/woman of your dreams . But you 're becoming increasingly unsure if she 's real , or just another hallucination .

`` No, honey, not this again,'' she sighed, her face scrunched up. 
 
 `` No, no, no - I know; I know it sounds absolutely fucking crazy to you, but you have to understand, love - I read that it can develop after you turn eighteen, okay? I do n't remember meeting you before then and I - I - `` I hang my head, swallow my words, *it's no use. * 
 
 *She'll never understand, * but I know what it's like, and I can spot it now. I've done a lot of reading; *I know when my mind's tricking me. * I look at her face - my beautiful, dear, darling Amanda is on the verge of tears. *This is the fourth time, * I know, but she needs it explained to her - I need to know. She looks so upset, but I have to be sure. 
 
 `` I do n't understand.'' She struggles to swallow a lump in her throat, her eyes are bruised and puffy, `` What are you saying?'' 
 
 `` You're - I - I do n't - I need to know,'' I stammer out like a *fucking coward. * 
 
 `` No, I mean... Nevermind.'' She slumps over a bit, her back hunching, `` Let's just - can we just get back to the movie?'' 
 
 `` No - no - no. I - can you please just, I need to know?'' 
 
 `` Know what? Can I just what?'' Her expression is tired but she spits the words out like a lit match. 
 
 `` You're not co-operating, please help me understand!'' I'm shouting. Why am I shouting? I should *quiet down and watch the movie. * 
 
 `` What the fuck do you want from me, Colin?'' She clasps a hand to her forehead and heaves a breath. 
 
 `` No - no. No. Get out. Leave and go away, please. I wo n't have any of it anymore.'' 
 
 `` I - what? No - nevermind. Fine.'' She got up and left. 
 
 That's the last I saw of her, *I knew I was right. *
