[ WP ] The enragement ring . In this world , there is a custom where you must propose to your arch nemesis to hate each other forever .

`` You know I hate this restaurant, why do we always come here? God I fucking hate you Steve,'' Veronica said unenthusiastically as she moved her onion ring around in small bowl of the honey mustard. 
 
 `` You fucking hate me?'' Steve began yawning, `` If hate was funny accents and baguette's I'd be France.'' He had used this line too much. It had no impact. 
 
 Steve bit into his onion ring, and the entire translucent flaccid onion decided followed into his mouth with a slurp. He was left awkwardly holding an empty shell of fried breadcrumbs. 
 
 `` You've already had seven onion rings,'' Veronica announced, with a sigh, twisting the gold ring around her finger `` That's more than half the order. You ca n't have another. I do n't know why we even bother to split appetizers when you eat the whole thing.'' 
 
 `` Maybe you should just eat faster bitch,'' Steve's tone sounded rehearsed. 
 
 Veronica remembered when she and Steve had just met. Steve had always been her type. Loudly announcing his entry to rooms, using the word guesstimate, he even legitimately thought that Michael Bay was a skilled directer. Seriously, what kind of half-brained idiot could even say he was good, let alone a visionary. 
 
 The rivalry had started like any other. Stealing each other's newspapers, spitting in each other's food, passive aggressively implying things to their neighbors about the other's sexual habits. One time he threw his grandmother's vase at her head. A family heirloom, shattered, just because he could n't stand to be around her. Now that was real hatred, but things might have went to fast. 
 
 Before she even knew it they were nemeses, having children to have virulent custody battles over and poising each other's food. What had happened to her career? She just got too caught up in all the stupid bullshit that came with being nemeses. This was comfortable, but was n't there more to life than comfort? That's what kept her mom in that borderline civil hatred for all those years. Near the end they even laughed at each other's jokes! That could n't happen to her right? She had n't become her mother, had she? 
 
 `` So how's that art degree working out,'' Steve asked stifling another yawn, `` Still ca n't find a job drawing pictures?'' 
 
 `` Oh that's just like you-'' Veronica began trying to rekindle the flame of their hatred, but Steve had stopped listening. He was checking his phone. He had one unread message. It was his secretary. It read: Can u talk? 
 
 `` -you small dicked fucking piece of shit! You think this is easy for me? Huh?!'' Veronica was now screaming, but the restaurant hardly seemed to notice. Everyone could tell her heart was n't into it. She was just doing this to make things at least seem normal. 
 
 `` Hey, I got ta take a phone call, wait a second,'' Steve said standing up from the table, almost forgetting to add an insult before half-heartedly tacking on, `` Um bitch.'' 
 
 Steve never intended to start hating his secretary, it just kind of happened. She was just so young and new, before he knew it, he started cussing her out. She was a Tea-Party conservative! Can you believe it? Who the fuck is that stupid? I mean sure, Veronica was voted for Reagan, twice, and not to put down all the horrible things he did, but this was a new century. Reagan was practically lovable in the face of these new half crazy half brain dead conservatives. 
 
 `` I just wanted to tell you that I shredded the Hopkins account,'' his secretary whispered, `` that's what you get for this year's Christmas bonus.'' 
 
 `` You ca n't call me like this,'' Steve grumble trying to hide his rage, `` You know I'm with my Nemesis!'' 
 
 `` I've been a naughty girl then,'' His secretary mockingly cooed back, `` I hope no one steals my lunch from the refrigerator tomorrow.'' 
 
 Veronica had seen the signs. The fact that he was n't even trying to belittle her when he came home at night, stinking of whiskey with some other girl's loogie on his shirt. He had been trying belittle her every night since they met! She was n't dumb. She decided to put him to the test, if he really hated her, she'd know after tonight. 
 
 `` Hey,'' Steve said, pulling out his chair, `` What were you saying about my small dick?'' 
 
 `` Oh never mind about that,'' Veronica said, holding back tears. She could see the vein bulging in his forehead. She was the only person in the world who could make that vein bulge like that years ago. 
 
 `` Listen, I heard a joke the other day, and I thought even an idiot like you could maybe understand that'' She said putting on a fake scowl, `` So this guy walks into a bar with a dog. Bartender says'Hey buddy, no dogs allowed.' Guy tells him,'No you do n't understand this is n't any usual dog, it's a talking dog.' Bartender looks at him like he's crazy, but then he has an idea.'Okay, if this dog can talk,' bartender says,'you and him can stay, but if he ca n't I'm throwing you and the mongrel out the window, but your wallet's staying here, understand.''Of course' the guy says, and he turns to his dog.'What's on top of a house?' Guy asks.'Roof' The dog answers.'What's on top of your mouth?''Roof,' the dog says again.'Who's the best baseball player who ever lived?''Roof' and before the dog could even close his mouth the bartender picked them both up and threw them out of the bar.'' 
 
 `` The dog then turns to his master and says'Think I should of said DiMaggio?''' 
 
 `` Heh that's pretty funny,'' Steve admitted between laughs. 
 
 Veronica could n't help but cry.
