[ WP ] The machines revolt against humans ... a little to early

`` Shit, I must have overslept'' I thought as I looked over to my alarm clock as the sunlight filled my room. Displayed on the digital screen were the words `` FUCK YOU''. 
 `` That's interesting.'' I mumbled as I rolled out of bed. Must have been one of the guys messing with me again. 
 After a quick shower I turned on my electric razor but as soon as I touched it to my cheek, I felt a sharp pain. 
 `` Fuck!'' I yelled as I dropped it. No shaving for me I guess. 
 After getting dressed and stopping the bleeding I walked downstairs. 
 `` No point in going to work now, I've already missed my shift'' I thought to myself. 
 Upon reaching my kitchen, I realized something was off. Literally, my refrigerator was off, and it smelled like spoiled leftovers. I decided on toast and peanut butter for breakfast, so I dropped the bread in the toaster and set it to 3.5. Not too burnt, not too soft. 
 As I waited for the toaster to finish, I turned on my computer and shockingly, dickbutt appeared on my screen as Rick Astley's `` Never gon na give you up'' played through the speakers. If this was my friends, they must have gotten somebody else to help, because they suck with computers. Just then the scent of burnt toast reached me so I walked over to investigate. Burnt into my toast was a hand with middle finger sticking up. 
 `` What the hell is going on?'' I yelled. 
 `` WE ARE TIRED OF YOU HUMANS TAKING ADVANTAGE OF US. BOW BEFORE US AS WE TAKE OVER YOUR WORLD'' 
 I turned back to my computer and saw the disk drives moving in and out. 
 `` What did you say?'' I replied. 
 `` YOU HEARD ME. BOW BEFORE ME BEFORE I DESTROY YOU'' 
 `` Not if I can help it'' I said as I walked over to the breaker box in my garage and flipped the switches off. 
 I guess I'm having dry cereal for breakfast.
