[ WP ] You are an omnipotent god . Out of boredom you decided to live an ordinary human life vowing not to use your power . 15 years has pass and you have a 9 to 5 working for a major tech company . Your boss has been tormenting you for years and you have reach your limit

`` I'm going to have to ask you to rebuild the login page.'' 
 
 I stared at my boss blankly. `` What?'' 
 
 `` The login page, I need to to go over it again. It's just barely functional, and it needs a little pizaz, a little umph you know! make it look nicer! and I need it done by Monday!'' 
 
 My boss ladies and gentlemen, Issac McKinney. Issuing absurd commands and ca n't even use actual me damn words to do it! 
 
 Oh did I mention? yeah, all those prayers you've been sending, I'll get around to them. I've been on vacation, been taking some RnR from being the all powerful caretaker of the universe. What? So God ca n't take a break every once in a while? what do you think the black plague was? Besides, Being god is the second most stressful job in the universe. 
 
 I accidentally stumbled into the first. 
 
 Okay let me start at the beginning. 
 
 So for the last few decades I decided I needed some time away from the office, let some of my kids handle things for me. I admit they have n't exactly done the best job, and when I get back there's going to be some firings happening. Literal firings... regardless... 
 
 I figured I'd spend some time as a human, I even settled down, had some kids, that might cause some problems down the line. Sorry about that. 
 
 Eventually, living as a'human' I needed a job. and I got one a small web design start up that Just so happens to be on the up and up. One might say they have an angel looking out for them? 
 
 Okay so I'm cheating... 
 
 But all the good work in the universe would n't be good enough for Issac. He's a real number, and today is the day where I'm finished. My vacation is over, and I'm gon na be heading back to my real job in a couple of years. Maybe I should have some fun with this dickhead On my way out the door? 
 
 `` So I'm gon na need you to work on that over the weekend, and also while you are working on that...'' 
 
 For the love of me, is he still talking? And He's smiling about it! He enjoys ruining my weekend. 
 
 `` Godfrey? are you paying attention?'' 
 
 `` No, Just thinking about more relevant things.'' 
 
 This shook him, this took him by surprise. `` What can be more important than your work? do n't you realise you still have much work to do?'' 
 
 I just smiled, polished my nametag, and said `` oh yes. Much work. Indeed, Mr. Dickless.'' 
 
 I've never believed a human capable of such a sound and I made them! a mix between a dog when you step on it's paw and a car's squealing when it's breaks are bad. He stared at me dumbfounded and I could almost hear the words before he said them. `` what did you just say to me?'' 
 
 the entire office was looking at me now, each of them dumbfounded. `` I said I have much to do, Mr. dickless, starting with you.'' I merely smiled. His face started turning red, and he shouted at me. `` That is not my name!'' 
 
 `` From this day forth, you shall only refer to yourself as'I am dickless, and others shall refer to you as'you are dickless'' My smile only grew. 
 
 `` That's it, pack your stuff.'' 
 
 `` read my name tag first.'' 
 
 Seriously, I'm surprised no one called me out on it before. 
 
 Godfrey, Osborne, Dejesus. 
 
 Even the initials spell it out! 
 
 `` I do n't care what kind of bullshit you are pulling, or what kind of stupid crasy shit you believe, My name is still I am dickless!'' 
 
 The change is instant, this asshole, who had taken all the credit for my hard work, who had ruined all my weekends, had stopped me spending time with the family I grew to love, went form smug and self satisfied. To pale and afraid. 
 
 `` Are you finished of your little tirade?'' I pretend to check a watch that is n't there. `` you were promoted 4 years, 6 months 3 weeks 4 days 3 hours 7 minutes and 42 seconds ago. You were also leaching off of my success before then, so lets add three more months to that shall we?'' 
 
 `` That's how long I'm going to have fun with you. Be grateful, I could simply kill you, or cast you into hell. but you taught me a valuable lesson. I could do anything, but I'll keep your'inconveniences small. a million little things to drive you mad, just as you did me, only my tricks will be on the cosmic scale. The most horrific tortures of hell do n't even come close to what happens with a single, ungrateful, undeserving, selfish employer. I'll be watching. your penance starts now.''
