[ WP ] You are a realtor showing a house to a young couple . They love the house , but you have something to disclose , and no its not a murder .

Blood dripped down the moldy concrete wall and collected into a small drainage basin beneath the... *thing* as it's various writhing tendrils smacked a messy sort of finger painting pattern around it's rim. It was making a noise that sounded somewhere between rustling leaves and *sucking*, and while it did n't seem to have anything that could reasonably be described as a mouth, it did seem to have quite a lot of teeth. 
 
 `` So you were being euphemistic when you listed this as having plenty of built-in New England charm?'' the father quipped, `` Because that thing looks like Satan's Anus.'' His wife scoffed and delivered a quick punitive blow with her handbag before returning to shielding their offspring's eyes. `` What? All I'm saying is that's a negotiation point.'' 
 
 `` Just do n't talk that way in front of the child'' she trailed off, her eyes returning to the terror before weakly adding `` It's gross.'' 
 
 I picked a rusted can off the floor and tossed it into the center of the quivering mass on the wall. One of the... thing's... tentacles deftly plucked the can from mid-flight and pulled it into the mass, and I choked a little at the sensation of rising unthinking terror that swept over me as the can vanished with a crunch. Get it together. Assume the sale. 
 
 `` Actually, it's included in the asking price. This is one of the reasons we had you sign an NDA prior to viewing the property. Actually, the previous owners got a lot of use out of it since it'll eat just about anything. You'll never have to run to the transfer station again so long as you live here.'' I managed a weak smile. `` Although, you'll want to make sure that you never let any pets or the children... ever... play in the basement.'' 
 
 The child squirmed, and the wife tightened her grip on her son reflexively. `` Ca n't you just get rid of it? It seems so dangerous to just have it here. I mean, ca n't we call a contractor... or a scientist... or a priest or *something*?'' 
 
 `` The previous owners hired a number of specialized contractors to remove it, even cut it right out of the wall, but unfortunately it keeps growing right back.'' I put on my best poker face, time to bring it home. `` It's best to assume it's a feature of the property.'' 
 
 The husband snorted `` So that's why it's so cheap. Well, I guess it's not the end of the world. It is in a great location, honey, and it's in our budget. We can just put a lock on the door.'' He paused, gazing long into the gurgling terror as it endlessly undulated in the wall. `` Hey, where do you think stuff goes once you feed it? Like... in the lawn?'' 
 
 `` You know... I'm pretty sure we're all better off not knowing.''
