[ IP ] volcanic ash deposits

`` Okay, this is the spot.'' Gene Roddenberry announced, holding up his hands to frame in the spot. `` Captain Kirk will come from the sand and seek refuge here in the shade of these giant black turd things. He'll be dragging an alien chick with him. You know, some one with green or blue skin. He'll spout some self-righteous crap, then we'll follow them down to the sand while they make out, and cut away just before he slides his pink weasel in technicolor ass -- or whatever.'' 
 
 `` Why is the chick always green or blue?'' One of the writer's asked. 
 
 `` You're fired.'' Gene shouted. `` Get me another writer, and a coffee -- black.'' 
 
 `` Another masterpiece.'' The other writer complimented. 
 
 `` Get your lips off my ass. Write it like I told you, and maybe preface the alien love session with maybe a ridiculous tentacled monster. We'll have Captain Kirk roll unnecessairly, then pretend to fire his phaser at the creature. And, for Christ sake, do n't let Shatner make those -- *Pew. Pew. * -- sounds while he's firing. It looks ridiculous on tape.
