[ WP ] It 's your tenth birthday and you 're finally old enough to get your first Pokémon . On your way to Professor Oak 's lab , and owl flies by and drops a letter into your hands . It 's from Hogwarts . You read the letter and realize you have a very difficult decision to make .

Larry opened the letter, he had not been receiving letters as of late, he nearly ripped it as he tore through the envelope. A 10 year old deprived of news, tragic. `` Larry Botter, Professor Oak is trying to rape you ( trigger warning ), do n't go into the lab. Yours truly, Diddlewhore.'' 
 
 `` Hootoot, Hootoot'' chirped the owl. 
 
 Professor Oak exited the lab and stared at Larry, stared into Larry. `` Come into my lab, close the door. I'm offering free pokemon...'' 
 
 Larry replied, `` Do n't rape me professor'', as he stood his ground letter in hand. 
 
 Oak stood quietly, beckoning him into the room with the wag of a finger. The finger was not on either of his hands. 
 
 Larry stared at the trouser Ekans, dangling about in the air, as though it had a mind of its own. `` Nice'' 
 
 Larry pulled out his wand and put on his robe and wizard hat. 
 
 
 

