[ WP ] In a unanimous decision , the US Supreme Court decided to label caffeine a Schedule I drug . Describe the fallout to this decision and the United States post caffeine illegality .

`` Fifty dollars.'' I told him with a straight face as I held out the ounce of dark brown liquid, surface swirling with streaks of gold. 
 
 `` What? That's ridiculous!'' the man shouted, his face pale. `` I used to pay a buck or two for this!'' 
 
 I kept a straight face as I told him, `` Those days are over my friend.'' 
 
 Judging by the bags under his eyes and the way he habitually rubbed the back of his neck, I knew he would pay for it. When caffeine ( along with most other stimulants ) was made illegal, much of the population was largely unaffected. They most likely had a short phase of tiredness and possibly a small head or neck ache, but eventually found they were able to live a normal life without the drug. The remaining were not so content. The heaviest users went through withdrawals akin to a heavy cigarette user. Headaches, constant sleepiness, irritability, lethargy, constipation, muscle pain, inability to focus, nausea, and even depression are all symptoms of the severance of a serious dependence on caffeine. 
 
 I was no different. Having been a barista for years before prohibition, I found myself livid that not only was I out of work, but my stash of beans would n't last long. Luckily, I had made quite a few connections in South and Central America over the years and was able to set up a small smuggling operation here in Austin. It did n't take long for my personal consumption to turn into a speakeasy of sorts for those unable to give up the substance. 
 
 `` Fine.'' he murmured, with a face of pure dejection. He slid over the cash with shaking hands and I gave him the small demitasse cup. `` But if I need to put sugar in this, I want a refund.'' 
 
 `` You wo n't.'' I assured him, confident in my ability. 
 
 He sipped the warm cup of happiness and seemed to regain some color. I always felt some remorse, but the dangers associated with my career choice warranted higher the higher prices. If I was caught, the scale of my operation would mean a life-sentence. 
 
 I sighed to myself as I ground, tamped, and pulled another shot for him, this time pouring a small amount of steamed milk in the shape of a leaf. I handed him the drink. `` Have a cortado on me.'' 
 
 The look of appreciation in his sad eyes was heartwarming. I'm too nice to these people. No, we need to stick together. The ban on caffeine is if nothing criminal itself, even if it does make me fairly wealthy. 
 
 I looked around at the patrons in my small establishment, which was located behind a hinged bookshelf in the corner of a used bookstore whose owner ( also an addict ) I had made an arrangement with. It was a small room, 700 feet square or so, with old brick walls and polished concrete floors and exposed ducts. I installed a fairly decent filtration system to deal with the smoke and vapor that I could never disallow. A small turntable spun in the corner, spouting blues and anything else people wanted to hear at a reasonable volume. You never know who's listening. 
 
 I loved it, and I believe the illicit nature only made me love it more. There's something special about a secret gathering of like minded individuals, spitting in the face of tyranny. And sadly, these people were as close to family as I would most likely ever have. 
 
 The serenity was broken by a loud pounding on the heavily bolted door. Ben, the bouncer, nearly tumbled off his stool as he woke from a nap. He pulled up the security feed as I approached and revealed the scenario that plagued my worst nightmares. DEA agents had ripped the bookshelf off it's hinges and were attempting to ram the door down. The feeble old bookseller was there next to them, his face full of remorse. He glanced up at the hidden camera and quickly mouthed'sorry', knowing I would be watching. 
 
 I knew it was n't his fault. The man was a true coffee snob, and he would never do something to compromise his supply of brown nectar. Someone else must have tipped them off. 
 
 No matter. This is why we have protocol. I signaled everyone to help me place all the beans, cups, and the small La Marzocco machine onto a sturdy cart. Then, as the patrons stood back and observed with curiosity, I hit a small hidden lever that lowered the cart and Ben into the hidden basement under the building. I ca n't imagine how long it took to dig that out with the hard rocky soil native to this area, but it was one of the sole reasons for choosing this location. 
 
 Once the hidden elevator was back in place, I started handing out the bibles and instructing everyone to grab a bottled drink from the fridge. I disappeared behind the bar only to return dressed in the attire of a priest. Someone ran up with a heavy bronze book stand and a large old bible and I signaled one last person to open the door as I started reading aloud from it. 
 
 The agents burst through with unnecessary violence, almost knocking the poor man who opened the door off his feet. 
 
 `` Everybody down! This is a rai-'' the lead agent stopped mid sentence as he observed the strange scene. 
 
 The entire group of patrons was holding hands with bowed heads as the agent stormed up to my podium. 
 
 `` We know you are illegally serving coffee here. Now just make this easier on yourself and tell me where it is.'' he growled through clenched teeth. 
 
 I calmly stepped down and in a hushed tone said, `` Sir, this is a weekly meeting for bible study. I'm not sure what you mean.'' 
 
 `` Do n't play dumb with me!'' he yelled, losing control of his anger. `` Why would a bible study meet in secret?'' his snarl crawled upward into a grin as he assumed he cornered me. 
 
 `` Well, the atheists in Austin are very extreme and have been harassing us quite frequently.'' I tried to keep my voice as meek as possible. `` We arranged to meet here to avoid their interruptions of our prayer. Which, as you see, you have just accomplished.'' 
 
 He looked around, anger fading to confusion. He shook it off and sneered again. `` You may be smart, but the dogs will prove your guilt.'' He signaled for an officer to bring in a caffeine dog. The dog came running in, straining it's harness while it smelled the air. It seemed confused at first, but it immediately began sniffing the lead agent and sat down in front of him. The signal that he had found the drug. 
 
 `` What is he doing?'' the agent asked the handler, anger beginning to boil over again. 
 
 `` I... I do n't know. Do you have caffeine on you sir?'' the handler asked with trepidation. 
 
 `` Of course not you idiot!'' he yelled. And while they argued, I had to suppress the smile that was building up inside me. While the agents were pounding on my door, the feeble old bookseller had managed to spray a concentrated dose of pure caffeine on the lead agent when his back was turned. This was all according to plan but by no means an easy task, and I would be sure to compensate the old man with a good pound of Yirgacheffe ( his favorite ) if I could get my hands on some. It's much harder to get African varieties smuggled in, so it's quite valuable. 
 
 The agents seemed to have regained some composure, so I winked at a skinny girl named Eva to begin the coup de grace. She stood up with the speed of a chameleon, to avoid startling the armed thugs, and raised her hand as if to ask a question. 
 
 `` And what the fuck do you want?'' the lead agent spouted as he began to approach her. 
 
 `` I'm Eva Gonzales, with the Austin Chronicle, and I would like to get your official statement as to why DEA agents are harassing a bible study.'' she said with the confidence of a seasoned journalist. 
 
 `` I... eh...'' he stammered as the look of true panic overcame his macho facade. `` We're leaving.'' he said to the men, and they filed out of the room. 
 
 As the door closed, I grinned at the congregation and in unison we uttered `` Amen.'' 
 
 -edit- small mistakes here and there. Thanks /u/veritate_valeo and /u/more_iron_YEAH
