[ WP ] Suicidal Thoughts in Heaven

`` It's not that the grass is greener, it's that there even shades of green at all. There's only so much bliss any consciousness can take, only so much perfection it can experience.'' 
 
 The noise from shuffling feet along the edges of the granite auditorium were always difficult to overcome at first, and just at the thought his voice was more than adequate. 
 
 `` The question is n't if you'll want to leave, the question is when. You'll revel...'' 
 
 It was odd that they raised their hands now, only a short time before they would just blurt out any questions and continue to until they were answered. More interesting was the way the first question had changed. 
 
 `` Yes, you there in the third tier, your hand was up.'' 
 
 `` Is... Is this... am I in hell?'' 
 
 His quivering voice and the terror of miscomprehension was spreading among them all as they turned to one another. They always thought they were in or going to hell. 
 
 `` No, at least not yet.'' 
 
 They rarely grasped the concept quickly, no matter how clearly and eloquently stated. It was better to let them have their moment of panic and then reassure them after, they listened much better. 
 
 They were shouting now, some at him, others to one another, if he let them go long enough they'd start pounding on the stone doors they meandered in from. 
 
 
 `` Okay, Okay, OKAY! Whatever you thought when you sat down is either wrong or not a complete perspective.'' 
 
 `` None of you are dead!'' 
 
 That was straight out of the textbook and never failed to quell panic, you also got those puzzled faces. It was annoying that every group responded and appeared the same way. 
 
 `` If you'll give me a brief time without interruption I'll make everything clear as quickly as possible.'' 
 
 Silence, it was starting to get to him that everything came so easily. 
 
 `` As I said none of you are actually dead. However, you've died. Initially you'll understand this as the afterlife, though as you're currently living; feel free hold your breath to test this, you're not able to experience physical pain or discomfort. Emotionally you'll find something similar, as soon as you recognize a situation in which you expect distress perspective will come and smooth things out.'' 
 
 `` Death is not a state of being, it is merely the transition to what you're likely to currently think of as heaven.'' 
 
 `` Birth and death are simply the processes of moving between lives.'' 
 
 `` This is heaven and you will enjoy it, for a time. Some of you will do so much longer than others, it's all relative to the current state of mind that you managed to accumulate during your `` life''. Eventually you'll realize this is as much your life as anything else.'' 
 
 `` So as I said at the start, it's not that the grass is greener anywhere else, it's that are even shades of green to experience. Trust me, as an angel, as your messenger, I assure you that each and everyone of you will long to encounter something that does not come easily. It's only a matter of time.'' 
 
 Again with the raised hands, almost half of all the hands in this place. He wished they'd do something rash instead, if only to break the monotony. 
 
 `` Everyone here has questions as you can see.'' 
 
 Their polite laughter was aggravating, that was a statement of fact not a cute observation made to make them more comfortable. 
 
 `` Allow me to finish and I may answer most, if I do n't you'll find many others through the doors behind me that will.'' 
 
 `` Again you have died, but are currently living. Eventually however you will desire to form a new consciousness and wish to leave. It is guaranteed that Heaven will become hell, this is a cycle that has taken place across a span of time so long that at the moment you can only comprehend it as eternity.'' 
 
 `` Yes. you will meet your maker. You may even enjoy the company.'' 
 `` Yes, some of or all of your loved ones are here.'' 
 `` No, no one is going to punish you for anything you've done or thought.'' 
 `` Yes, you are in another dimension.'' 
 `` No you're physical body is not here, nor will you ever possess it again.'' 
 `` Yes your appearance is what it was, or rather what you thought it was.'' 
 `` Yes, what some of you understand as reincarnation is true, albeit there's more to do with physics and thermodynamics than any morality or ethics.'' 
 
 The way they all sat, with such poise and calm it was evident the ether was beginning to take effect. If only they would not cave so quickly. 
 
 `` Finally, yes you will better understand your own actions, shortcomings, and thoughts from before you died. As well as those of others that you remember.'' 
 
 That was the question that pacified any group, now they really were beginning to look like sheep. That notion had bothered him from his start as an angel, but watching it over and over it had become an livid observation. For some reason it was particularly infuriating now. 
 
 `` Before you walk out these doors there is one last thing you must know.'' 
 
 `` Suicide'' 
 
 `` It's the only way to leave this life. It is the only way to start a new consciousness. Here no one can take your life, only you can.'' 
 
 At his first lectures their placidity at this news was a relief, now it was maddening. The serenity was n't coming as quickly as it once did, the fear of leaving this comfortable existence was n't ebbing either. 
 
 `` Truly it's not a taking as much as it is a giving up, you'll have no craving for violence or a grandiose dramatic demise. There will be no hamartia, no need to hide or seek privacy.'' 
 
 `` No one here is able to tell you what will occur to you. All we know is you will fade from here.'' 
 
 And honestly good ri.....
