[ WP ] The self destruction of the Cassini spacecraft sets off an intergalactic space incident . Tell us about it .

Gruff Laser-Fist: `` A paper clip and a toaster.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` That's all it took?'' 
 
 Gruff Laser-Fist: `` Yep.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` Well just start from the beginning, I wan na hear the whole thing! Please!'' 
 
 Gruff takes a swig of his drink. It was only the best Saltying, squeezed fresh from the self proclaimed god himself. 
 
 Gruff: `` Well after the ship blew to kingdom come the Lulgarians automatically thought it was an act of war against them.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` Was it in their sector?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` No.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` Then why'd they think that?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Pissy race.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` Ah gotcha. What next?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` What's next is they hired some Tr'olls.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` who are they?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Douches. Space douches. Also mercenaries.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` And you had to fight these mercenary space douches?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Yes. My ankles are still sore.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` Oh from dipping and dogging their attacks of course.'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Nah it's from them biting my ankles, they're quite short, and a tad on the chubby side. My foot actual does hurt a little from all the punting I did.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` And then what!? Tell me tell me!'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Well then I decided to take the fight to the Lulgarians and finally set them straight before any other empires got involved. I went aboard their ship and there he was, waiting for me.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` WHO?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` It was their best warrior. He called himself, D'am Da-ni'el.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` Is this when you use the paper clip and toaster?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Not yet, first we had to do battle. It was hard fought. He brought out some Compton. I then hit him with some Fresh Prince in return. But one word from Tupac was what ultimately took him down.'' 
 
 Gruff: `` After the battle I was slightly winded but I kept on. I made it to the control room, where the leader was seated on his throne, I asked if he would cease his attacks on myself and the Galaxy in general.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` What did he say?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` First he tried to intimidate me.'' 
 
 WimpyKing: `` We did n't do anything, bruh.'' 
 
 Gruff: `` But it was clear that he could n't be reasoned with.'' 
 
 WimpyKing: `` But whatever your problem is we would be more then happy to help, bruh.'' 
 
 Gruff: `` He left me with no choice other then utter annihilation.'' 
 
 WimpyKing: `` Literally do whatever you want just do n't hurt us, bruh. 
 
 Bystander: `` paper clip toaster?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Yes. I fashioned the paper clip into a makeshift power converter capable of self sustaining energy and then placed it tactfully in between the main burst engine and the thermal power core.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` WOW. And what did that do?'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Nothing. But then I threw the toaster in their space trash can and everything blew up.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` whoa. You're so amazing. You restored Intergalactic peace.'' 
 
 Gruff: `` Yep.'' 
 
 Bystander: `` Just one more question Mr. Laser-Fist. How did you get your last name.'' 
 
 Gruff: `` That, oh young and innocent civilian, is a story for another time.'' 
 

