[ WP ] Take a joke and replace the punchline to make a solemn or serious story .

A priest, a rabbi, and a duck walked into a bar. The priest ordered a whiskey, and the rabbi ordered some new-ish and extremely sweet wine. The duck just quacked. 
 
 `` Look,'' said the priest. `` I'm telling you, he does n't have viral enteritis.'' 
 
 `` We've been looking after him for the last seven years,'' replied the rabbi. `` It would be horrible to find that there really was something seriously wrong with him.'' 
 
 The duck quacked again, and then sneezed and pooped simultaneously. 
 
 `` See, that does n't seem... right,'' said the rabbi, indicating the newly-created white spot on the table. 
 
 The priest shook his head. `` I've been praying for him.'' 
 
 `` You ca n't pray for animals,'' replied the rabbi. `` They do n't have souls. Have you tried taking him to the vet?'' 
 
 `` There are n't many veterinarians who will look at a duck,'' replied the priest. `` They're not really common pets.'' 
 
 The duck coughed again, and then went after the rabbi's wine. 
 
 `` Knock it off, Joe,'' said the rabbi, bopping the duck on the side of his head, and he waved for the bartender and ordered a glass of water. 
 
 The duck, Joseph, quacked again. When the glass of water arrived, he helped himself. 
 
 `` Have you gotten him vaccinated?'' asked the rabbi. 
 
 `` Are you kidding me?'' asked the priest. `` Those shots cause autism.'' 
 
 Joseph quacked and took another quick drink of water.
