[ WP ] You were reincarnated and you retained all memories of your previous life . But instead of using this knowledge to become famous or rich , you instead use it to be the worst obnoxious little shit possible , always saying 'innocent ' things that are 100 % inappropriate in the given situation .

Sam and Ana hurriedly took off their clothes. They had only just gotten their son, Ethan, to go to sleep. He seemed to have a knack for interrupting the young parents at the most unfortunate times. All thoughts of romance out the window, Ana finally flicked her panties off with her feet and jumped onto the bed. 
 
 `` Hurry up and get that thing up before *he* wakes up again,'' Ana whispered desperately. 
 
 Sam, having had no relief for several weeks, did not need telling twice. He quickly jumped on top of Ana and bit her ear. She let out a moan just as - 
 
 ***KNOCK KNOCK*** 
 
 `` Mommy! Mommy!'' Ethan pounded at the door. 
 
 `` Should we just make him wait until we're done?'' Sam whispered. 
 
 Ana rolled her eyes and groaned before slapping Sam and slipping on a bathrobe. Sam begrudgingly slipped one on before Ana opened the door and picked Ethan up. 
 
 `` What's wrong, sweetie?'' Ana cooed at her darling, annoying 2-year-old. 
 
 `` I had a scary dream you were attacked by a big cock!'' Ethan screamed. 
 
 `` A what?!'' Ana gasped. 
 
 `` A cocka-doodle-doo.'' Ethan imitated the sound, `` He was big and black and he chased you around. A big black cock!'' Sam snickered and managed to turn it into an unconvincing cough. 
 
 `` Oh. Honey, that was just a bad dream. You have to sleep. You ca n't get up anymore,'' Ana patted his back. 
 
 `` Can daddy get it up?'' Ethan asked. 
 
 `` What?!'' Ana asked, startled, as Sam burst out laughing. 
 
 `` I asked if daddy can get up because he's grown,'' Ethan asked, his big, innocent eyes shining as he made his baby angel face, `` He's not sleeping either.'' 
 
 Ethan scampered down from his mother's arms and climbed onto the bed. 
 
 `` What was daddy doing?'' Ethan jumped up and down on the bed, `` Was he pitching a tent? I want to pitch a tent, too!'' Ethan crawled under the covers and sat upright. 
 
 Ana just stared blankly as Sam laughed uncontrollably. 
 
 `` I'm gon na go get you some milk and put you back to bed,'' Ana muttered and tightened her robe around her as she left the room. 
 
 `` Kids say the darndest things, huh, dad?'' Ethan said in his most serious voice, wearing the comforter as a hood and giving the creepiest stare he could manage. 
 
 Sam stared with wide eyes before he jumped up and ran to join his wife. 
 
 As Ethan slurped the milk from his sippy cup and drifted off to sleep, the only thought in his mind was, `` Ahh... This is the fucking life. Have fun being a cockblocking little git, then they'll bring me some warm milk and tuck me into bed. I think I'll be a little shit for a little while longer.''
