[ WP ] You run an RPG pawn shop . You haggle with adventurers who try to sell loot they 've acquired .

Introduction: I am Jericho The Covetous, king of kingdom Skyfall, the land of dragons. Before nobility, I was a merchant, and an excellent one at that. While my wealth was vast, my lust for treasure was a higher priority. Over the years, I've found that adventurers possess the greatest treasures. Because of this, and with the help of Mundus, I created The Abyssal Tradeshop. 
 
 *ringaling* 
 
 The bell on the front door rang, indicating another customer in my vast shop. It was the humble lad from Skyrim ( love the place. It has dragons, like Skyfall ), the Dragonborn. He did n't talk much, but he had some legendary items. 
 
 `` Welcome back to The Abyssal Tradeshop, Assblaster. What do you have today?'' 
 
 `` What do you have for sale?'' 
 
 Ugh, he always began every conversation with that, even if he was n't buying anything. From his back, he pulled out a full set of Legendary Daedric Armor that gave you fifty extra health when worn. Why he'd sell this? I presume he made a better set, with fifty-*five* extra health, after learning how to do it better. 
 
 `` Another set of armor, eh? Very nice. Here's 500 Septims.'' I donned the armor, and slid him the cash. Suddenly, he began speaking a strange tounge. *Fus Roh Dah? * What does that mean? Either way, it was a lethal dragonshout, and I run a safe business here. 
 
 `` I already told you, Assblaster, Dragonshouts do n't work in the abyss. Enjoy your forty septim bouty when you get home.'' 
 
 He was transported out of the abyss with the touch of a button. It's a shame, he probably had something good. Whatever, he was just going to sell me fifty iron daggers or something had he stayed. 
 
 *Twenty minutes later* 
 
 Another traveler entered, carrying a giant bag of loot. Oh, look, it's Geralt, the witcher. He usually had some good magical items. 
 
 `` Welcome back to The Abyssal Tradeshop. What do you have today, Geralt?'' 
 
 `` Well, I'm in a bit of debt. What'll you give me for this?'' 
 
 He pulled his necklace off and set it on the counter. This'll be good. A genuine Witcher Academy necklace was veeery rare. I examined the necklace, feeling the vibrations in its shiny chrome. 
 
 `` How much are you looking to get?'' 
 
 He thought for a moment, but looked back. `` 1000 gold.'' 
 
 I thought about the price for a bit. 1000 gold pieces for a simple necklace? Well, it was a nice necklace... 
 
 `` Why are you selling this? I thought witchers needed their magic necklaces.'' 
 
 `` I've always had a second one, which I kept at home. I figured its immaculate condition would catch your eye.'' 
 
 Well, he knew my reputation. 
 
 `` Hmm... I'll give you 750 gold for it.'' 
 
 `` Done.'' 
 
 He handed me the certificate of authenticity, showing that it was a true Witcher's necklace, in exchange for the gold. 
 
 Perfect... I have the best armor, legendary weaponry, all sorts of legendary items; and now... a Witcher's magic necklace. Perfect... soon, I can go a real adventure. I do recall a man who needed a caravan escort to Neverwinter. 
 
 ***** 
 
 /u/BookWyrm17 will get the reference. Anyway, you can find more of my work at /r/Picklestasteg00d.
