[ WP ] The stubborn judge insists that you fully obey the restraining order they just served you ... against yourself .

“ Mr. Jones has engaged in severe disorderly conduct and is a danger to those around him but more importantly himself. ” The judge croaked. 
 
 I shuddered, her black attire combined with her gaunt face and sharp spectacles made her look like a furious vulture gazing down upon her prey. 
 
 “ The prosecution found more than a 1000 – “ the judge squinted her beady at the paper, “ selfies on his personal computer ”. 
 
 I looked away as her accusative stare flashed in my direction and hung my head in shame. Even her movements were scary, slow and methodical but dangerous. “ And for the use of a selfie-stick ”. 
 
 “ Because of this obsession which endangers his own person Mr. Jones will be given a restraining order. He is forbidden from engaging with himself in any way. ” The judge rattled on, her eyes daring anyone they met to disagree. 
 
 My mouth was hanging open, she must have gone mad, how could I keep distance from myself? My questioning gaze was clearly seen by the judge as she rolled her eyes and sighed as if the whole weight of the world was pressing down on those bony shoulders. 
 
 “ All mirrors will be removed, all reflective surfaces covered, for the duration of the restraining order you will not engage yourself in any way. ” She raised her abnormally large fingers and pointed them at me. “ You must remove yourself from the situation, die your hair, change your clothes, take another name ” the judge smiled gleefully. “ and if I catch you in the vicinity of a selfie stick, or see your face on I-N-S-T-.. or whatever it is you use, I will personally make sure that you ’ ll never see the light of a selfie flash again! ”. The judge twirled the hammer in her long bony fingers. “ We have already decided on your new look. ” 
 
 The doors opened and I saw a flash of orange/red hair products and I knew that my worst nightmare would become reality, they were going to take my soul. 

