[ WP ] The night before Christmas , a train drunkenly pulls up right outside your house . It 's the Bipolar Express .

`` All aboard the bipolar express!'' The conductor shouted with glee. 
 
 The train began to move. I stared out the window in wonderment. I could see small villages against the contrast of the shining snow. Looking closer, I swear I could make put the faces of old friends and lost loves. Deceased family members smiled at me from their picturesque lawns. A smile crept over my face. 
 
 I waved. They waved back. This was perfect. I felt so loved. I felt so powerful. I waved at the people outside. They waved back. I could tell they were so proud of me. 
 
 As the train chugged on, the pace increased. The people began to become a blur. I could still make them put, but somehow they were unimportant now. It did n't matter if they approved of me or not. I knew better than them anyways. 
 
 I began to plan what to do to pass the time on the train. Maybe I could start a card game with someone? Someone had to have cards. Or we could MAKE them! That sounded fun! 
 
 But cards were boring. Some people would like them. Maybe we could start a foot ball game at the same time! How much fun would foot ball be on a train! 
 
 The trains speed increased even more. Outside I could n't make out any people as we passed by. The world became unreal. The only things I could make out were in here, in this train. But is n't that what mattered? 
 
 I needed to see the conductors about my ideas. They were obviously incompetent. I needed to bring some order to this place! And fun! Order and fun! 
 
 I looked down at my shirt. It was stupid. I could n't see them like this! I tore my shirt off and began to walk towards the front of the train. 
 
 The engine was loud now. It drowned out any other sounds. I wish I could make it stop. I mixed with the crowd of angry voices spinning through my head. Something was wrong. 
 
 We needed to slow down. We needed to stop! Why would n't this train stop!! 
 
 And then, it did. It halted so suddenly I crashed to the floor. Starring up at the ceiling, I once again heard the conductor's voice. 
 
 `` We are leaving Mania Ville and heading into Depression Town. You may want to get some sleep, this is going to be a long, slow ride.'' 
 
 And, huffing and puffing, the train crawled it's way along the tracks.
