[ WP ] You have just successfully prevented a zombie apocalypse . By killing the first one to turn . What you call `` heroism '' the police call `` murder '' .

I do n't know how much time they're giving me, so I'll get this of my chest now. 
 
 I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what happened and what I had to do. Even if they gave me a pardon and unplugged the chair, a part of me feels like I'd just plug it back in. 
 
 I'm tired. I can hardly believe myself what I did. At the time it was mostly reflex, a motion as swift and natural as making an incision in flesh. There was no guilt... Just the realization that I had a job to do. When you've spent as many years as I have, cutting people up in order to put them back together, you forget the real purpose of the knife in your hand. You forget that man made it to, first and foremost, cut. To stab, to slice, to separate the delicate ties holding things together. 
 
 I became keenly aware of that fact once I put him down. The boy. Raphael. He's been keeping me company these past few months. It kills me, because he was the best patient I ever had. Picture this: a young, Latino boy goes swimming in a lake one summer day. Few minutes later, he scampers onto shore. Eyes wide, lips quivering, a bite mark the size of CD on his ankle. His parents, God rest their souls, drive him to the hospital. When the orderlies carted him into my operating room, what did the kid do? Scream? Cry? 
 
 No. The little guy just lay there, still as a statue. Then he gazed up at me, his eyes wide like two brown chestnuts. His voice was rock solid, as if the president himself was speaking to me. 
 
 `` Will it hurt, Doctor?'' That's what he asked me. 
 
 God help me, I would've slapped myself silly had I known. I would n't have lied to him. But I did n't, how could I? I gave him my standard answer, some bullshit about laughing gas or something like that. 
 
 He was the cleanest patient I had too. Went under just like that. No fuss, no stress. 
 
 Five minutes later, he flatlined. 
 
 We'd only been probing the wound, checking for infection at that point. Nobody expected the kid to just drop off like that. It was like a bomb going off, that small, incessant beep. Made me fucking jump. 
 
 I called for other doctors, specialists. Someone ran off to get the paddles. All the while I was just shaking and cursing under my breath, looking down at this sweet kid. It would've been enough if he'd just died, and we'd ended it right there. Honest. It would be heaven compared to what I had to do next. 
 
 But, just like a good patient, Raphael came back. 
 
 He started stirring real quick. Eyelids flapping up and down. Fingers flexing. I did n't notice at first, too busy listening to the buzzing from the heart monitor and the pounding in my own head. Everyone else was busy, running the hospital to get help or prepare for the inevitable shitshow. But when he grabbed my arm, I noticed. Hard not to. The kid had a grip stronger than steel. He started crushing my arm like a vice, and dragged it towards his mouth. I started backwards, trying to push my self away. The kid dangled my fingers above his mouth, his teeth clicking together with this dead snapping sound. His eyes lolled in his head, looking in two different directions. With my remaining hand, I tried to push his head down, but it spun back up, nearly breaking my arm in half. 
 
 Then it all happened. Everything was deliberate. Grad school taught me to leave nothing up to chance, and that's what I did. I grabbed a knife from a nearby table, and in one, clean motion, I stabbed the kid in arm. He did n't react, at all. 
 
 So I went for his eye. I felt the gelatin give way to the steel, the feeling of the knife reaching what was probably long dead gray matter. The kid stopped immediately, and fell back. Lifeless as a ragdoll. 
 
 That's what I did. I wo n't deny it, and I'm damn sorry I had to do it. Maybe I was overreacting. Maybe the kid did drop off and come back as some flesh-munching ghoul. That's beyond argument at this point. 
 
 I've got one regret, really. One thing I want to get straightened up with whatever's waiting for me afterward. 
 
 I hope it did n't hurt. For God's sake, I hope it did n't.
