[ WP ] Humans finally get through the Earth 's crust and hell is real . The first thing we see is Satan himself .

`` You know, it's easier to get here if you're just a little naughty,'' Satan's jaw was firm. 
 
 My crew and I disembarked from our excavation vehicle and stepped down onto the red rock of Hell. A cavern wall rose up behind us, somehow we had drilled our way through the side wall of Hell, initially believing that we may have found an air pocket. The sulphurous air stung my nostrils, yet it was n't so hot as you would expect. I looked out into a featureless plain of red stone, a desert, though no dunes. 
 
 `` Come on now boys,'' Satan flicked a finger towards us, `` If you're gon na stay you might as well join me.'' 
 
 Satan wore a simple suit, shoes shined, and hair neatly combed around two curling horns. If I was n't aware of his status as the underboss I'd have guessed he might have been the manager of a Best Buy. 
 
 `` You're less imposing than I'd have guessed,'' I tempted him. 
 
 `` Son, it does n't take a beast to pull out your intestines, it does n't take an inferno to strip the flesh from your bones,'' he said, `` it just takes a little incentive.'' 
 
 `` What do you mean?'' I inquired. 
 
 `` You see son, do these hands look like the hands of a man who could labour for an eternity? No son, you see in Hell I simply promise people that if they succumb to a life of torture, in return they will have the opportunity to torture someone in return. And you know what,'' Satan winked, `` I've never had anyone say no.''
