[ WP ] Someone gets stuck in Limbo-With a famous dead person

Bob was a normal, white, middle class office worker. He did nothing out of the ordinary for such a person, other than taking great satisfaction out of mundane tasks. Bob's favourite pastime was opening packages. He just got a rush out of the uniqueness of each sensation; whether it be the sawing tear of paper, or the inconceivably effortless gliding smoothness of scissor shears through cellophane. 
 
 One day, like any other Bob was walking to work. He was thinking absent-mindedly about how he used to spill glue on his desk in first grade on purpose, so that he could peel it off later. The invigorating sensation was so engrossing that Bob did n't see a car swerve off the road, and careen towards him. 
 
 The car hit him. he died. 
 It was n't that awful though. He died in a state of bliss. 
 What happened after though was n't as great. 
 
 A niggling need to orient oneself brought Bob from nothingness. He was on a set of stairs near the summit of a great mountain. Down the slope he saw a man pushing a small rock up the hill with moderate difficulty. It did n't seem too difficult, and the man seemed engrossed in his work. Bob began to contemplate approaching the man, when a voice next to him called out. 
 
 Turning around, Bob was shocked to find a woman with a slight scowl staring at him. Still startled, Bob asked who she was, and how she knew his na... `` It does n't matter!'' she snapped, interrupting him. `` I'm tired of this, so follow close. 
 
 `` See that man?'' pointing to the other man pushing the rock up the hill. That man has been pushing that rock forever. His name is Sisyphus. He always wanted to push rocks in life, so now he gets to forever. He gets almost to the top, and then has to do it again. Does n't get to choose how big the rocks are each time, which can be amusing. There was one time when we set it up to look like hell so that we could scare some unwelcome guests. But is mostly always banal. `` Your types are so boring. So annoying'''' `` I hate when you humans just love the stupidest of activities, it's awful, and blase, and...'' she rambled on. 
 
 Meanwhile Bob looked at the man pushing the rock up the hill and thought of the possibilities. Imagine if he got to open things! `` Wow that would be so neat.'' Bob fantasized almost out loud. 
 
 The woman caught herself at some point, probably due to Bob's increasing giddiness; and refocused on a clipboard that Bob had n't seen until now. `` Anyway, your activity... Let's see.. 
 
 Bob anxiously waited 
 
 She continued, scanning the clipboard as she spoke. `` You are suited...'' 
 
 `` to...'' 
 
 `` Limbo.''.... 
 
 `` What?'' Bob reflexively spoke. 
 
 `` Limbo, you know, your favourite activity?'' the woman peevishly replied. 
 
 
 `` No. it's not. There must be some mistake.'' Bob earnestly exclaimed. 
 
 `` the clipboard never lies'', stated the woman bureaucratically. 
 
 `` But I like opening packages!'' Bob frantically proclaimed, as if his fervour would help clear the misunderstanding. 
 
 The woman scoffed briefly, and then proceeded to tear his ego to pieces. `` THAT, is the stupidest thing I've ever heard!'' `` Who would take pleasure in simply opening packaging? Downcast, Bob mumbled'' I do''... The woman then ignored Bob; and announced that he was to be disassembled and reassembled in the setting for him to enjoy his eternal limbo. Bob argued, but with a sneer the woman robotically scathed that `` The clipboard never lies.'' Then she literally tore him to shreds. 
 
 Oddly enough Bob enjoyed the process. He did n't know why he felt no pain in the process, but as parts of him were delicately torn, and whisked away, he in a strange turn of events enjoyed the process. As the last remnants of Bob disintegrated into dust, and began travelling elsewhere, the woman took measure of her work. Realizing that Bob was for some reason enjoying the process, she yelled `` Sicko!!'' in disgust and anger that the reception to being disintegrated was not as intended. 
 
 Leave it to Bob to be too entranced to take proper stock of a situation.. 
 
 When Bob awoke for a second time, he was at an ethnic bar. He could n't tell which kind. Fiji was a water bottle brand as far as Bob was concerned. He tried to properly look around, but became drawn to a pole, suspended horizontally above the ground. 
 
 Inside Bob groaned. `` Why could n't it be something else.'' He tried to focus elsewhere, yet could n't. After what seemed like an age, Bob thought, `` Maybe the pole is covered in something.'' If it were, he could try to peel it, or at least examine it closely. Finding it easy to walk up to, Bob scanned the pole for details. Nothing jumped out at him, so he went to touch the pole. And could n't... 
 
 He did n't know how, or why; but he was not able to touch the pole. Bob frowned glumly, and began planning his next course of action. Meanwhile the pole began to move closer to Bob. Positioned over him, Bob was lost in thought when a force started pushing him downward, and backwards. Bob, cried out in surprise; but then realized what was happening... `` Limbo''. This greatly displeased Bob, not so much because he hated the sensation. Rather, it was being unable to fulfil his fantasy, and the symbolism that Limbo had that caused anger in Bob. 
 
 He became stuck there. Endlessly trapped in constant limbo. 
 
 

