[ WP ] Everyone is given points all your life . Doing bad things subtracts points and good things adds points . When you turn 18 your points are revealed and determines your position in life . You are the first person in a century to have a score over 300

I kicked a dog once. I even felt pretty bad about it... 
 
 Ohhhh... do n't get upset, the dog is fine now. Just had a limp. There was one time I stole some pills from my grandmother. It was some heart medication or something. 
 
 I shoved one of them up my ass thinking it'd make me halkucinate or something. But nothing happened, and I could n't even sell that shit... long story short, I dont consider myelf a model youth. 
 
 So color me surprised when the Karma institute gave me a score of 300. That's a near perfect karma rating. ( 302.537777 is a perfect rating, do n't ask me why ) 
 
 They measure everything you do in life. Save a kitten from a tall tree? Get a positive point to your score. Used only a little bit of toilet paper when wiping your ass? Thats another positive point. 
 
 Kick a dog in the stomach? Well thats like 30 negative points... I sure as hell do n't spend much time saving kittens from trees. Toilet paper I try to save though. I'm not a monster. 
 
 You go to your friends house and take a large shit. Then wad up a mound of toilet paper the size and density of a softball and try to flush that down a tiny hole. It does n't work! Then you have shitty wet floors all over your `` friend's'' house. I use the term friend loosley because i'd kicked dogs for doing less than that... 
 
 My parents were happy I just turned 18. Free from the legal obligation to support me. Obviously they were as shocked as I was when they discovered my karma rating. Tried to figure out what the error was. But according to the institute, there was no error. 
 
 The instute was founded a few years before i was born, so the system was fairly well developed by that point. Only more refined as years went on, they have placed people into some of the worlds most sought after careers. With a score of 300 i was basically able to choose whatever i want for the rest of my life. I just had to do one thing. 
 
 The testing rooms at the karma institute are very sterile. Comfortable temperature and nice furnishings, but something seems off. If i had to pin-point it, id say its the lack of fragrance. I wonder if i could smell a fart in here? 
 
 Before i had a chance to let one rip and test my theory, a couple of white coats came in and placed in front of me a no.2 pencil and a sheet of paper face down. 
 
 `` Fill out the questionare, and turn the paper over when you are finished.'' The woman speaking to me was, shorter than the guy, and looked a little more friendly. `` You have 15 minutes.'' 
 
 I knodded and they went back through the door they came through. I flipped the sheet over and there was only one question. 
 
 `` If your mother needed 20 dollars, would you loan it to her?'' 
 
 Hmm... Okay... uhh Wait! is this a trick question? I mean, why would n't I loan it to her? Is there a catch? What does she need it for? Will she pay me back? Even if she did! Would that matter? And why ca n't I smell that fart?!?! 
 
 Before I knew it, the fifteen was up. The coats came marching through that one door and stood before me at my desk. They collected the pencil i snapped in half, and the questionare, which i answered `` getFUCKED'' 
 
 After reading my response the two coats looked at eachother and then marched out without saying anything. I was escorted out of the facilities, met with my parents, and the we drove home. 
 
 I do n't really know why i answered the test that way... maybe i had a panick attack or something. I dunno. What i do know is i am now making more money than my parents combined doing something I love! Sucide prevention... 
 
 I the guy they call when they need someone to talk people off the ledge. I'm good at it too! Somehow, i manage to maintain a 98 % success rate. Some people jump, and it does n't bother me because i like to see how twisted they end up when they land. But usually it ends up with me climbing a ladder and just carrying them down. Like a cat from a tree.
