[ WP ] English has been simplifying itself for over 10'000 years , now everyone talks in dank memes

As soon as the alarm clock rang, he woke up and got out of bed. Friday, party Spock was in the house tonight, baby. The morning routine was on. 
 
 – “ GOOOD FUCKING MORNING! ” Spock shouted in front of the mirror. It was going to be one helluva day. Second step: a cup of tea with a shot of jager. 
 
 In the meantime, Scott was struggling to move his ass out of the covers. *There ’ s not enough coffee in the world to Get Me. * His brain was a useless sack of protoplasm at this time of the day. 
 
 – “ JAGER BOMBS! ” a sudden roar came out of the kitchen. Spock was having a breakfast. 
 
 – “ Morning how are you? Im fine and you? Im good thanks and you? ” Luc was mumbling nonsense as usual. 
 
 – “ Friday drinking friend assemble! ” said Spock downing a second jager. 
 
 – “ Chill out! ” James entered the room. 
 
 – “ Nigga you gay! ” Luc pointed out James ’ orange Mankini thong underwear. 
 
 – “ Ultra Gaaaaaayyy!! ” added Spock. 
 
 – “ Super Mega Ultra Gaaaaayyyy!!! ” Scott joined the conversation. 
 
 – “ P.E.M.D.A.S ” said James in response. 
 
 – “ WTF? ” 
 
 – “ Please Excuse My Dope Ass Swag ” James dropped the mic. 
 
 – “ LOLLOLOLOLO ” everyone was dying of laughter. 
 
 – “ I smell Bacon! Luc exclaimed with pleasure. 
 
 – “ ME GUSTA! ” said Spock. 
 
 After a solid breakfast consisting of 12 sausages and 12 rashers of bacon, 20 slices of toast, 16 boiled eggs, 4 bowls of beans, 6 grilled tomatoes, and a plate of onion rings, the crew was ready to continue the day. Scott decided to meditate to start the day with a calm, clear head. *Come on inner peace, I don ’ t have all day. * Scott and Luc were playing Fifa ultimate team, trying to make the sweatiest team ever. Scott believed that he was born in it, molded by it, and it was all he played till he was already a man. Luc, on the other hand, was wondering why the fuck he was still playing. James was doing something in his room that nobody dared to see or think about. The day passed almost imperceptibly into night. 
 
 – “ What time is it? ” asked Scott. 
 
 – “ Party time Bitchezzz! ” Spock officially announced. 
 
 – “ This is going to be the best night ever! ” said Luc. 
 
 – “ WooHoo, Party Time! ” James came out of nowhere. 
 
 – “ First drink.. Give me all the jager you have. ” 
 
 – “ Ready to play? ” someone brought a beer bong. 
 
 – “ Down it, Down it! ” 
 
 – “ HAKUNA MA ’ VODKA! ” 
 
 Well, shit went from 0-100 REAL QUICK. *What happened next? * Nobody remembers! 

