[ WP ] Humans have - by a very large margin - the longest lifespans of all intelligent life in the universe . You are a human student at a multi- species college , and you / your friends are just realizing that compared to them , you are an ancient being .

“ Hey, you want a cookie? ” I asked my roommate, “ My mom just sent me a care package. I got all the good stuff in here. Are you OK? It ’ s just a chocolate chip cookie. ” 
 
 “ Your carrier made this? ” Tik asked in hushed whisper as he broke the cookie in half with a look of wonder. 
 
 “ Yeah, ” I shrugged. There weren ’ t many humans at Mars University and, over the past two weeks, the ocarin had become my closest friend; even though he wasn ’ t going to be around long because he was doing a super accelerated course. I ’ d even got used to the sounds he made when he ate ramen noodles, although watching how he used his oral tentacles whenever he ate peanut butter still turned my stomach. 
 
 “ And you ’ re sharing them with me? My friend, I will remember your generosity until the end of my days! ” Tik ’ s voice cracked with emotion and he put one of his damp hands on my shoulder. 
 
 “ Dude, it ’ s really not that big a deal. ” 
 
 The hand on my shoulder tightened. 
 
 “ If I had anything of my carrier ’ s I would share it with you too and cement our bond of friendship! ” 
 
 “ Thats fine - wow, wait! Your mom ’ s dead. Jeez, I ’ m so sorry, I had no idea. ” 
 
 “ There is no need to apologise, all carriers are dead. We grieve together, my friend. ” 
 
 “ Uh, no. My mom, my carrier, is alive. How do you think she sent me these cookies? ” 
 
 “ But, but that is impossible. She would have to be over 140 Ocar years, that ’ s, that ’ s, two Earth years!! ” 
 
 “ Yeaah, obviously. I ’ m twenty, you know that right? How old are you? ” 
 
 Tik ’ s hand slid off my shoulder and, for a second I thought he was going to punch me. I ’ d never seen anyone look so betrayed. 
 
 “ I am twenty four, ” his tentacles stopped quivering, but he was still angry, “ In Ocar years. I guess, by the Earth calendar, I would be 3 weeks old. ” 
 
 “ Dude, you ’ re a baby, ” I tried to joke, I felt like an ass. My new friend had just told me he didn ’ t expect to live longer than a year. 
 
 “ This is -, ” Tik turned away with a shrug. “ This explains why you are such a bad student. If you flunk this year, you can just *repeat it next year! * You truly do have all the time in the world, ” his voice was bitter, but he still ate my mom ’ s cookie.
