[ WP ] '' The light that burns twice as bright burns half as long '' The opposite is true

It is the day of my nephew ’ s 24th birthday and I am to take part in the celebration as an honoured guest, an elder of the clan to be respected and revered. I am to be seated at his right, a position of prominence, the place his father would have been proffered had he been alive. I take this seat as his surrogate, the man who took him under his wing after his father, my brother, passed away over two decades ago. I raised him as my own, making sure he wanted after nothing, paving his way to the success for which he was destined. I say destined because he was born with an innate intelligence and a burgeoning talent which made future eminence inevitable. He is, in all ways, his father ’ s son. 
 
 Of all the memories of my childhood, the one which rings clearest in my mind is an afternoon spent at home in front of the television. The broadcasts of the day were dominated by the news of the death of Kurt Cobain, a self-inflicted shotgun blast taking his life at the age of twenty seven. We sat dumbfounded in front of the screen, my twin brother and I both ardent fans of Nirvana. How could a man at the peak of skill and mastery, an individual whose sheer talent and intuitive grasp of the spirit of his generation, make the decision to end what he had built with his own hands? Our mother listened in as she prepared the evening meal and answered our question. Her off-hand yet poignant response would leave a lasting impression. 
 
 “ Poor guy... It ’ s as they say, the light that burns twice as bright burns half as long. ” 
 
 At the time I didn ’ t fully comprehend the significance of what she was saying but nodded along. My brother ’ s expression was one of grave seriousness, as if the words had set the direction of his whole life. In many ways it had, for that night as our mother turned the lights off in the room my brother and I shared, he whispered to me from across the room and began what would be his rapid ascension to glory, and simultaneously sowed the seeds of my contempt. 
 
 “ Psst.. you awake? ” 
 
 “ Yeah, what ’ s up? ” 
 
 “ What mom said about Kurt Cobain today... What do you think she meant? ” 
 
 “ I dunno, something about a light and burning or something. ” 
 
 “ I think she meant something else. A light that burns twice as bright burns half as long... It ’ s like, the time we have to do something big, it ’ s not forever, y ’ know? 
 We only have so long to really make a difference, just like Kurt did. ” 
 
 “ So what, you wan na be a rock star like him? ” 
 
 “ I don ’ t know what I want to do, but whatever it is, I ’ m gon na burn bright while my flame is still strong. ” 
 
 I fell asleep quickly but my brother tossed and turned for some time. The next day I ’ d already forgotten what we discussed, falling back into insignificant amusements to idle away my youth. But my brother never again joined me in my childish pursuits, choosing instead to spend his time bettering himself, studying and honing his skills. He never wavered in his dedication and he continued to progress and achieve as I stagnated. By the time we graduated high school he was valedictorian, first in academics and athletics. I was the school layabout, caring more about smoking cigarettes between classes and getting drunk and chasing tail in the evenings. Our parents heaped praise and admiration upon him and rained scorn and worry on me in equal measure. As he left for college, a full scholarship to the very best institutions to study politics and law, I remained behind to work mowing lawns and tending bar in the evenings. I couldn ’ t help but grow resentful – my twin, my constant companion and best friend, had not only left my side but completely outstripped and outshined me in every conceivable way. Any time anyone ever spoke to me they would mention my brother, the successful twin that shone like a bright star over the pathetic shamble of my existence. I think of my seething emotions at the time and I share their contempt of me – it was, after all, my actions and choices that resulted in my condition – but hindsight by definition always comes too late. 
 
 When he returned triumphant after completing law school, I made the decision. I smiled and hugged him, patting him on the back and congratulating him alongside the rest of my family, and when he retired that night I snuck into his room and asphyxiated him with a plastic bag. His death was ruled accidental and I joined the whole town in mourning the passing of their most gifted son. My conscience was clear. He and I entered this world as two halves of the same being, yin and yang in a state of perfect balance. By seeking to elevate himself he upset that balance and it was my responsibility to restore the equilibrium by taking his life. The fact that he had a girlfriend on the other side of the country that carried his child was his final act of spite, his way of upstaging me one last time even from beyond the grave. 
 
 My nephew blows out the candles on his extravagant birthday cake. The guests raise their glasses and toast to his health and happiness. I lower the glass to my lips and the champagne passes down my throat like acid. I see in my nephew the arrogant self-satisfaction of his father, the cocksure swagger and despicable vanity. He meets my eyes and smiles, his loving gaze shredding at my soul like razor-sharp claws. He embraces me and I rise to deliver a speech. 
 
 “ Ladies and gentlemen, as I stand in front of you I struggle to contain the pride I have for my nephew. I know if his father was here today he would feel just the same. My dear boy, I have watched you grow into the fine man you are today, and in your every feature I see your father. You are like my own son, and I can not express in words how much I love you. ” 
 
 Tears well in his eyes as he embraces me again and the room fills with applause. I smile and pat him on the back, and all I can think of is the poison I have smeared on the lip of his champagne glass. When the time comes for me to bear his coffin and watch him buried next to his father, I know I will feel nothing but satisfaction. It is my destiny to send my nephew to the arms of his father. As our mother prophesied, the light that burns twice as bright must, as a law of nature, burn half as long. It is my lot in life as a dull flame to burn long enough to make sure that the brighter flames are snuffed out when they have reached their apex. 

