[ WP ] You are drawing your final breathes , dying from a disease that has taken you far too young and far too quickly . Just as you are about to pass , an apparition appears before you and offers you five extra years of perfect health to spend as you see fit . But there is a catch ...

*Interrupted. It ’ s not fucking fair. I ’ m only 31. I feel interrupted; but in such a way that the transgressor has cut me off so abruptly that he ’ s stolen all of my words; all of my stories. Except….it ’ s not a story. It never was a story. It ’ s my life. It ’ s my fucking life and I ’ m 31 and it ’ s fucking over. * 
 
 
 She hit enter on her FaceBook post from her hospital bed at the same moment the nurse came by to check her pain levels. She turned away to avoid eye contact. 
 
 
 “ Margot, how are you feeling tonight? ” The Nurse asked her, gently ( and perhaps cautiously as well ). Margot turned briefly to face the man: 
 
 
 “ You know this is bullshit, right? ” 
 
 
 “ I am sorry. ” The nurse replied as softly as he could while looking over her chart and adjusting her IV. “ Margot, life doesn ’ t always- “ 
 
 
 “ ALWAYS WHAT? ” She interrupted him as he fiddled with one of the many tubes connected to her body. “ You going to tell me that life isn ’ t fair? That only the good die young, or some other two -bit bullshit to try to make me feel better about the fact that I ’ m fucking dying? You going to tell me to hold my loved ones dear, or call my mom? Well guess what mister nurse, I don ’ t have any loved ones, and my mother died of the same fucking thing at my same exact age! You know what it ’ s like growing up with a single alcoholic father, then, do you? Because I fucking do. ” With that Margot ’ s voice snapped as she was blinded with hot, angry tears. She managed to turn and bury her face into the papery pillow before her body was racked with involuntary sobbing. She couldn ’ t breathe, she felt embarrassed, and she didn ’ t care. The nurse stood by her head and placed his hand on her shoulder. 
 
 
 “ It doesn ’ t have to be the way you think it has to be. ” Margot continued to sob for a while and the nurse slowly withdrew his hand from her shoulder. “ You know I could make you an offer if you would like. ” Margot was extremely confused and oriented her body so that she was facing the nurse. Only…he didn ’ t look the same as he did a moment ago. Margot gasped and realized that the nurse was now emulating…or pulsing? His body was lightened by some ethereal source. He was illuminated but there was no obvious source. Margot stared in awe; for some reason, the fear in her body had vanished and she simply wanted to look at him in wonder. 
 
 
 “ What are you? ” She asked, very confused. The nurse sighed and stared off into the distance for a moment before answering: 
 
 
 “ I ’ m not even sure to be honest. I just know that I can help you, but it will come at a cost. ” 
 
 
 “ Cost? ” 
 
 
 “ Yes; I ’ m afraid that ’ s just how it works. I can give you a few more years but not without risk. ” 
 
 
 “ I ’ m… ” 
 
 
 “ Confused?'' 
 
 
 “ Yes, I guess that ’ s the word. ” Margot was now sitting almost completely upright in her bed ( something she hadn ’ t been able to do for a few weeks ). “ Is this from the morphine? Oh my God, this is it, isn ’ t it? ” 
 
 
 “ Well, it doesn ’ t have to be; that ’ s what I was trying to tell you ” The nurse, or angel, or demon, or whatever he was started to slowly twirl her IV line around his finger like a teenager playing with his hair during an awkward conversation. Margot began once again to feel the frustration welling up inside of her chest and tears once again glistened at the inner corners of her eyes. 
 
 
 “ What the devil are you talking about? ” The nurse looked at the ground, and then raised his eyes to meet her gaze. 
 
 
 “ Maybe it is the devil I ’ m talking about. Look, I have a gift…but it ’ s hard to explain. I have certain abilities…but…at this point…they are limited. I can give you five more years before the cancer comes back. That means five years of perfect health; you can go back to work, travel the world, whatever you want but, you have to realize that there are certain matters you have to face first. ” Margot was quiet for a few seconds, then replied softly: 
 
 
 “ Ok. Do it. Give me five more years and I will do anything that you ask.'' 
 
 
 “ Ok. So, basically, I ’ m sure you have heard of the concept of the human soul? Well, it sort of exists, but like, not quite; you do have a soul, but it has nothing to do with your next life, really. It exists more like…a litmus test, yes, that ’ s what I ’ ll go with. It ’ s more…scientific. Matter, including metaphysical matter, can be transferred. Emotion and feeling- those are both metaphysical and can be traded for the physical, you know….um…years. I can grant you a few years of your life but you have to visit some of the emotions and memories that you have pressed down inside your whole life; and they may…change a bit. It can be…rather traumatic, to say the least. Years can be sometimes... transferred from one soul to another.'' 
 
 
 “ I ’ ll do it. ” Margot was desperate for this to not be the end; it wasn ’ t her time, or so she felt. She did n't much care what it took to get a few more months or so. “ What do I have to do? Visit my ghosts of Christmas past? ” With that, she laughed, as did the nurse. 
 
 
 “ Sort of. Take my hand. ” Margot gripped his fingers and was surprised that they felt very warm; she felt almost instantly high. Or maybe that was the morphine. 
 
 
 “ Are you alright? ” The nurse asked as her eyes fluttered. 
 
 
 “ I think so. ” 
 
 
 “ Ok, just focus the best that you can. ” Margot Sighed and her eyes closed. She felt as though she was in a trance. She began to dream. 
 
 
 “ Margot, get ready for school! ” Margot looked down at her body and noticed that she was wearing a frock…her arms and legs were quite stubby, and her feet looked like they could fit into doll shoes. She was a child again. And…her mother! Oh her mother was calling her from the stairs! She ran, no, she fled from her room and ran to the top of the staircase when she heard a voice; her father ’ s voice. She hesitated as he sounded very angry. 
 
 
 “ What in the actual fuck, Maureen? Did I fucking tell you I was hungry? No I fucking didn ’ t! Margot heard a stifled yelp and the sound of what she could only assume to be a plate of eggs being hurled at the wall. She knew instantly what was about to happen. This was the morning that her mother told her father that they needed to separate; this was the morning she had been waiting for all of her five years- her mother had told her to pack her little suitcase before heading to school- this was the day they left him behind; forever! They were going to be happy, they were going to be little two person family! They were going to be free. This was her favorite childhood memory. The phone rang, and Margot realized that this was not how her memory played out in the past….that day in her memory, that day they were going to leave… her father had not come home from work at all…they left before he arrived. This was not how things played out, not at all. She stayed at the top of the stairs as she heard her father storm out of the house and her mother timidly answered the phone. 
 
 
 “ Hello? ” 
 
 
 “ Maureen? ” This is Doctor Samuel…I ’ m afraid I have some bad news. ” 
 
 
 Margot woke up again in the hospital bed, drenched in sweat and looked up to see the nurse sadly staring over her. 
 
 
 “ What was that?? ” she screamed. “ I know that memory- that wasn ’ t it at all, you just changed it! That ’ s bullshit! Mom left with me that day; we had a beautiful two years together before she died! She didn ’ t get that phone call until after we moved in with my aunt! We had a glorious time with her sister before she died! Those were the best two years of our lives, she died happily away from that man! What the hell have you done? ” 
 
 
 All at once Margot found herself at work. She was seated at her desk; it was quiet. She was very confused and quickly glanced at the clock on her computer. 10:34AM. Friday, April 22nd. Margot gasped. This was the day of her diagnoses. She knew what was coming at 10:35. The phone rang. She reeled back. She knew it would be her oncologist, granting her a death sentence. 
 
 
 “ H-hello? ” she spoke timidly. 
 
 
 “ Margot? ” 
 
 
 “ Yes. ” 
 
 
 “ This is Doctor Samuel, I have some good news: the lumps are benign. ” Margot covered her mouth in shock and simply hung up the phone, unable to speak. 

