[ WP ] Turning your girlfriend into a pumpkin was the last straw . Your wizard house-guest has DEFINITELY overstayed his welcome .

`` A *pumpkin*!? You turned her into a PUMPKIN!?'' I swerved, narrowly missing an oncoming car. 
 
 `` Oh ya, no biggie.'' Mort's voice from the other side of the line was nonchalant, even bored. `` You know how I am with my plant magic. Got a real green thumb, ye? Besides, she was being a bit of a nag, and pumpkins do n't have mouths... amiright?'' 
 
 It was all I could do to not hang up on him right then and there. `` Mort... I told you, use magic one more time in my house, and I would have your head.'' 
 
 `` Yeh, yeh, no need to be such a buzzkill, mate.'' He said dismissively. `` But, mate. Did you even hear the rest of what I said?'' 
 
 I grit my teeth. `` No, Mort. I am not going to pick you up a fifth. Hell, I am not going to pick *anything* from the store for you, *until you set her right*!'' 
 
 `` Alright, alright, geeze.'' Mort sounded exasperated. `` I'll get her back to normal in a jif. Do n't get your panties in a wad. Gon na need that fifth though,'s an integral part of the spell.'' 
 
 `` Uh huh. And I'm the queen of England.'' My grip on my phone was so tight it was painful. 
 
 `` Well, hey, if you do n't *want* me to change her back... Halloween is coming up pretty soon, mate.'' He laughed like a hyena right into the receiver, forcing me to hold my phone away from my head. `` Naw, just playing mate. I'll set her straight. But do n't forget the fifth!'' 
 
 He hung up the line, leaving me to stew in my own thoughts. `` Alright. If that's how you want it to be...'' I glanced at the leather-bound tome on the seat next to me, pages worn from hours of study. `` Two can play at this game.'' 
 
 
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 *Thanks for the read! CC welcomed, and if you enjoyed you can find more of my work over at /r/TimeSyncs! *
