[ WP ] Mythological stories are just an attempt by ignorant humans who watched and described from their point of view the advanced humans/aliens with their scientific gadgets , space ships , weapons , etc . Pick your favorite mythological story and/or character ( s ) and turn it into a science fiction story .

**Edit several months later: I have come to [ hate ] ( https: //www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/3vu6j5/otweekly_spotlight_cawendaw/cxrdpvr ) this story and wish I'd never written it. I had in mind, when I wrote it, that I would spotlight the screwed-upness of the original Greek Myths by putting it in a more familiar context, stripped of the blessing of antiquity. Instead, I think I did the exact opposite, and *normalized* some legitimately terrible things, and perhaps even gave them the blessing of modernity. Because I do n't want to hide my mistakes, I will leave it up, but... bleh. Ick. Please know that it *was* a mistake to write it, one that I remain deeply sorry for and ashamed of. ** 
 
 ~~'' It was the nanites, dude. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' No man, I'm telling you, I got game! Earth chicks dig me! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' You do n't have game, dude, you never had game, you never will have game. You're nervous and your palms get sweaty. The nanites in our bodies sense you're nervous, so they turn your sweat into Earth pheromones. Earth chicks dig the pheromones, dude, not you. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Whatever, man. You're just jealous because I've got game. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' You think you've got game? *Dude, you think you've got game?! *'' ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Whoa, hey, take a chill pill, man, I was just --'' ~~ 
 
 ~~'' I am chill dude, but I told you. You get nervous as shit. Your palms sweaty? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Um...'' ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Good, time to see if you really got game or if it's just the pheromones. Smear your hands on a tree or something, then try to see if you can score wearing rubber gloves. If you've got game, you'll score. If it's the pheromones, we get to watch an Earth chick make out with a tree or whatever. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' A tree? That's not cool man. Trees are... scratchy. We should try something... softer. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' What's the matter dude, I thought you had game? But fine, we'll try something softer. What around here is soft? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~*honk. hoooooooooonk! *~~ 
 
 ~~'' Watch out, man, I think that swan is pissed. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Yeah. Hey, swans are soft, right? `` ~~ 
 
 -- -- -- - 
 
 ~~'' That was... weird. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Weird, but pretty conclusive. You have *no game*. I told you. Nanites, dude. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Yeah, fine, nanites. I did n't expect for her to go for it... quite that much though. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Yeah. I guess the nanites must have affected the swan, too. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' I know, the swan was pretty into it, right? Like, disturbingly into it. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Yeah, they were both pretty into it. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Do you think that was... wrong? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Eh. Probably not. They were both into it, right? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Yeah, and it's not like she's gon na get pregnant. `` ~~ 
 
 -- -- -- - 
 
 ~~'' Oh man, she's pregnant! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Yeah, dude, that's kinda what happens when you bone a chick a bunch of times. Congrats, I guess. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' No, not Danae! Leda! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Who's Leda? Shit, dude, is she one of mine? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' No, she's... you remember the thing with the swan? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' You... *you boned the swan chick? * Dude! Not okay! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' No, that's the thing, I *didn't* bone her! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Ok, so she's boning an Earth guy, what's the problem? Is the swan gon na get jealous or something? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' The problem, man, is that I scanned her. The baby's *mine*. *My* DNA. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' And you're *sure* you did n't bone her. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' I *watched her bone a swan, * man! No way am I sticking my dick in that! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Ok, maybe it's the nanites? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' How could it be the nanites? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Well, we already know they can mimic human pheromones. Maybe they're mimicing your sperm too? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Oh, gross, man, are you telling me I'm *sweating sperm*? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' I... I do n't think so, dude, I think you're just sweating nanites and sometimes they turn *into* sperm. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Oh, thanks man, that's a relief. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Whoa, hey, do n't touch me. You're sweating sperm, dude. Personal space. `` ~~ 
 
 -- -- -- - 
 
 ~~'' Oh, shit man, now Danae's pregnant too! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Yeah, dude, that's because you boned her a bunch of times. I thought we covered this. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' No, man, that's the thing, I was being *careful*! We never went all the way! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' So, it was just like, what, oral? Handjobs? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Um, yeah man, like... that. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' It was n't anything weird, though was it? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Uh... not... too weird...'' ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Dude...'' ~~ 
 
 ~~'' It was just a little watersports, man! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' What, like, fishing? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' No, like, y'know, man, golden showers. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Oh, dude. TMI, dude. TMI. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' But now she's pregnant! `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' From a... golden shower? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Well, more than one. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' *Dude. * I do *not* want details. I dunno dude, nanites again? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Fuckin' nanites, man. We got ta patch these things, this is getting outta hand. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Priorities, dude. First you got ta step up and actually raise your goddamn kids this time. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Whatever, man, I can afford child support. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' How? Dude, you have n't been messing with the precious metals settings again, have you? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Um.... no? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' *Dude. * This is getting outta hand. We * can not * afford another Sodom, someone's gon na notice. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' But I did n't even do anything! I was just, y'know, explaining to this really chill king about the nanite interface, and he was like'can you turn things into gold' and I was like'shit yeah' and he was like'can I try?' and I was like --'' ~~ 
 
 ~~'' Dude, we've been *over* this! We went over this after the salt thing in Sodom. We went over this after the stone thing with the Medusa chick, which for all we know is *still goin on*. We went over this after the cat-human hybrid thing in Egypt. We went over this after the bronze thing in Greece, and the marble thing in Greece, and the marble thing -- *again* -- in Italy. We've been over this, and over this, and I'm *so fucking over* this! How many dead this time? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' None, man! Hand on my heart, none! They patched the nanites, now they come with an undo button. Anyway, point is, now we've got a lot of free gold. So it's fine, child support wo n't be a problem. It's *fine*, man, it's fine. `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' I dunno, dude, what if her dad gets pissed at her? `` ~~ 
 
 ~~'' He's got a grandkid and he's about to get a shitload of gold, man! Seriously, how pissed could he be? `` ~~
