[ WP ] An alien race arrives on Earth with plans to wipe us out so they can steal all our resources . At some point during the war we figure out that after our destruction their plan is to steal from the atmosphere all the airborne carbon we have been producing ...

Garnidan General Vestor slammed his fist on the table. He kicked his chair out from under him. His eight feet of height created an imposing visage across the almost five and a half foot tall, still sitting, Earth Ambassador Lu. 
 
 “ We demand your ultimate surrender, ” yelled the General. 
 
 Lu continued to sit but held the General ’ s gaze. “ We will not do such a thing. ” 
 
 “ You are beaten. Your forces are depleted, ” roared Vestor. 
 
 “ We are at a stalemate. You have gained no significant ground in months. ” 
 
 Vestor slammed his fist on the table with every word he spoke. “ When our reinforcements come you will be sorry. ” 
 
 “ You have been threatening us with their numbers. ” Lu held her hands out and looked around the room. “ Where are they? ” 
 
 “ They will be here Terran and then you will be crushed like a bug. ” 
 
 Lu nodded as Vestor spoke. “ We are tired of fighting. Enough people have died on both sides of this war. We are prepared to share our resources with you as best we can, but no more than we can spare. ” 
 
 Vestor laughed. He held his sides and leaned back. His voice echoed around the room and rumbled in Lu ’ s chest. “ You wouldn ’ t be offering anything if you knew you could win. You are afraid of losing. We will take what we want. ” 
 
 “ Do you need clean water? Soil microbes? What is it you want? ” 
 
 “ We want your gaseous carbon, and we won ’ t ask you for it. ” Vestor snarled and clenched his hand in a fist in front of Lu ’ s face. “ We ’ ll take it. ” 
 
 Lu furrowed her brow. “ Gaseous carbon? ” 
 
 Vestor growled. “ We will not ask for a lesser species for the carbon dioxide in their atmosphere. ” 
 
 Lu looked around. “ You want the carbon dioxide from our atmosphere? ” 
 
 “ Does your small Terran brain not understand how important your resource is? Do you not understand the plans of a greater species? ” Vestor laughed. “ I don ’ t know what I expected from you. ” 
 
 “ Have it. ” 
 
 “ What? ” 
 
 Lu shrugged. “ Go ahead and have it. ” 
 
 Vestor blinked in disbelief. “ Uhm, okay. ” A snarl crossed his face once more. “ We ’ ll take as much as we want. ” 
 
 “ Sounds good to me. ” 
 
 “ Stupid, Terran. You don ’ t understand what you have given away. ” Vestor laughed. 
 
 Lu smiled. “ You sure got the better of me. I don ’ t know how you did it. ” 
 
 Vestor grabbed his chair and sat down. “ Good. Recognize your place at the feet of a superior species. We will now discuss how your people will report for their slave assignments. ” 
 
 Lu ’ s eyes went wide. “ What? 
 ______ 
 Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this check out /r/Puns_are_Lazy for more of my stories. 

