[ WP ] You have to explain to your mother why you are playing Monopoly with Obama , Putin and Xi Jinping in her basement at three in the morning .

`` Seven!'' shouted Meerg with excitement as the dice came to a stop. He was slightly overselling it. He tapped the piece around the board one square at a time, counting up from one to seven. 
 
 He peered over at Obama, still holding the piece on its destination. With a stern fixed gaze, he removed his hand slowly from the little metal shoe and paused, waiting intently for a reaction. 
 
 Obama owned the property, but obediently remained silent. Casting a non confronting gaze toward the floor, feet slightly shuffling, he feigned a small cough and motioned that the turn had ended. 
 
 Meerg looked over at Putin. `` Your turn!'' 
 
 Putin stewed on a private thought for a moment, before slowly picking up the dice. His face hid an unhappy expression behind a layer of disciplined stoicism. Not bothering to shake the dice, he released his fist and let them flop down with an uneventful tumble. 
 
 `` Four!'' 
 
 `` Move your guy!'' 
 
 -- A BOOMING KLAXON SOUNDS IN THE DISTANCE -- 
 
 Meerg looked upwards at the top of the basement stairs, startled only for the briefest moment before appearing annoyed at the interruption. 
 
 `` We're down here mom!'' Shouted Meerg, hands over ears. 
 
 `` Mooooomm'' 
 
 `` We're down..'' 
 
 -- the kalxon shuts off -- 
 
 The three captive leaders exchanged glances for a moment. Meerg was silent, suspended in anticipation as he listened to the footsteps approach from upstairs. 
 
 `` What are you doing down there?'' 
 
 Meerg's mother was casting a long shadow down the basement staircase, her hands on hips. Her tone and body language set an expectation for a satisfactory answer. 
 
 `` We're playing Monopoly. I found it down here.'' he declared, unapologetically. `` Humans keep all kinds of stuff in houses.'' 
 
 `` Meerg, these alarm systems are monitored. I had to pull a lot of strings to get these three here, you could at least not make me phone in a security check.'' 
 
 Meerg with eyes rolled upward, silently mimed along his mother's words while making a stupid face. 
 
 `` Meerg.. If you want to lead your own territory in the empire some day, you should learn a thing or two about politics.'' 
 
 Meerg composed his expression and shouted back a reply. `` Talking to them in their holding room was depressing. This house is depressing. I hate it. How much longer does this stupid invasion go for? Why can't-'' 
 
 `` Will you ever stop complaining?'' His mother was getting annoyed. `` I think you'd better get back on track, ok? I want you back upstairs in ten minutes and I expect you finish your questions with these Earth leaders''. 
 
 She turned slightly, beginning to walk away, but paused. 
 
 `` And why do you insist on playing Earth games? Why do n't you at least play something from our homeland?'' 
 
 `` I do n't know mom.. Why do you sleep with Earth men?'' 
 
 Meerg bit his lip. His face was painted with immediate regret. His eyes darted for a moment, his body frozen. 
 
 Meerg knew that his mother had formed a serious and meaningful relationship, strictly forbidden and potentially damaging to her military reputation. It was not a thing to joke about. 
 
 The three Earth leaders looked awkwardly aside. 
 
 Slightly squinting, Meerg awaited the thunderstorm of a response he was surely due. He'd overstepped. Action before thought. Even for him, this was BAD. This was probably embarrassing and hurtful. Brace for impact. 
 
 Meerg's mother slowly resumed her turn from the basement entrance, and walked away silently. 
 
 `` Wait, I..'' 
 
 Meerg launched from the table and ran upstairs. 
 
 `` Mom wait..'' 
 
 His voice faded into the distance. 
 
 ``..Four, was it?'' Putin picked up the tiny battleship from its square, and advanced it around the board.
