[ WP ] 6 years later , a top of his class Navy Seal trained in gorilla warfare finally finds the person who talked smack to him on the internet

Six years, and I'm finally staring the fucker down through my scopes. He's chilling on a small chunk of ice a couple miles away. He's the one who told me I would never make it; I'd never be a trained gorilla. 
 
 I slide down the snowy hill and flip into the sea. He does n't see me coming. I swim closer and closer until finally I see his impromptu raft above me. I flip my tail up and smack the ice, rocking it back and forth. 
 
 Surfacing, I shout, `` How do you like that, you fucking polar bear!'' My years in the Navy, learning the art and strength of the gorilla, have taught me never to hold back, always to win. 
 
 `` Wha-what?'' the polar bear says. That fool does n't know what hit him. I dive again and roil his raft before surfacing once more to see the dumb look on his face. `` Who are you?'' 
 
 `` I'm that seal who you said would never make it in the Navy! Here I am, bitch!'' With that, I dive down again, then burst through the water and into the air. `` GORILLA SLAM!!!!!!!'' I slam down on the ice and break it apart before frantically frothing the water with rage. 
 
 A few minutes pass and I calm down. I see the polar bear limping away on the mountainside, looking back with defeat and regret. He'll never talk smack to me again.
