[ WP ] Your twin sister was destined to eradicate evil , but you were tasked with eliminating the far greater threat : Stupidity

I always wake up at the crack of dawn while my sister lied on her bed still in her cape and mask, snoring away. 
 
 I brushed my hair in the mirror on our wall, looking at her through the reflection. `` It was so awesome!'' she had told me when she came in an hour earlier. `` I totally got to rip this guy completely apart and watch his dogs eat his body! But that's what you get for filming minors like that. And then I stopped two robberies and threw a mugger off a building! Do you want a grilled cheese?'' 
 
 I had n't. 
 
 I went down to the basement and logged into my super computer. Early morning rush hour was upon us. As usual, I had a busy three hours. I tuned my voice into car radios, `` Hey Jackass! Turn on your turning signal before the car behind you slams into you. Also as a common courtesy since you're driving with other humans who depend on you to follow driving laws so they do n't DIE.'' 
 
 After that, I practiced my teleportation skills. I caught a kid trying to steal the answer key from his teacher's desk. I promptly smacked the back of his head. `` Stupid,'' I told him. 
 
 I found a girl crying alone at a park bench. `` He was right,'' she was sobbing into her friend on the phone. `` I am worthless, no one will ever love me. I want to take him back, everything will be okay if we're together again.'' I threw a shoe at her and when it hit her face I pointed at her. 
 
 `` Stupid.'' 
 
 A woman in a grocery store was berating a cashier for not accepting her expired coupon. I knocked a box of cereal from her cart and jumped up on down on it. `` Stupid, idiot, bastard!'' I yelled with every jump. 
 
 Later in the day, I found a group of boys on the subway platform break dancing. `` Watch this, bro!'' said one in a red hat. `` Film this! When the train starts moving, I'm going to use it to kick off and do a backflip!'' The boys all cheered and stood together as the train doors closed. As it pulled away, the boy in the red hat ran toward it. 
 
 I appeared in thin air in front of him and pushed him backward. Then I threw a frisbee at his friends and it smacked all of their faces in a row. `` Idiots. Go home and study!'' I yelled. 
 
 Just then I noticed my sister standing on the steps with her hands on her hips. I waved at her. `` Hey girl!'' 
 
 She shook her head. `` My telepathic senses told me there was someone being spiteful here. Turns out it's just you not knowing the difference between how to handle something your way and the right way.'' The boys behind me whooped at her insult. 
 
 `` Oh please,'' I scoffed. `` And this is coming from the person who tore a man in half last night?'' 
 
 `` Wait, what?'' said the boys. `` Hot!'' said another. 
 
 My sister rolled her eyes and walked down the rest of the steps. `` I give people what they deserve. You're bullying people. And what I do with bullies --'' she reached behind her and took a pair of nun-chucks from her pink backpack. `` Is not pretty.'' 
 
 The boys behind me whooped again. `` Run, crazy girl!'' they yelled at me. 
 
 `` Hey,'' I yelled at her. `` This is my job. I'm here to stop stupidity, are you really going to stop me from doing my job?'' 
 
 `` Why do n't you educate people instead of using violence and calling them names?'' she asked, coming towards me. 
 
 `` That's the dumbest thing I've heard all day!'' I shot back. I reached into my blue backpack for a handful of flip flops and threw them one by one at my sister approached. She tried to dodge but each one smacked her in the face. `` Stupid people are n't going to listen to you when you appear out of thin air. Stupid people are set in their ways!'' I started throwing frisbees. `` Stupid people are so emotionally tied to their point of view, civil discussions turn into arguments that go in circles!'' 
 
 My sister's face was red from being hit so many times. She was so angry, her nostrils were flared. `` If you're so smart, you'd know there's more than one way to do your job.'' 
 
 She flung one of her nun-chucks at me but I dodged. `` You act like you're so much older than me!'' I screamed. 
 
 `` One minute makes a lot of difference,'' she said, and started to beat me with the nun-chucks, slamming me in the stomach and the head. 
 
 I swiped her legs out from under her and sat on her chest, taking water balloon after water balloon out of my backpack now and breaking them by hitting her face with them. Her hair was wet and her eyes were squeezed shut. `` Do you know how stupid it is to tell someone how to do their own job?!'' I yelled. 
 
 The boys were all filming this. `` Twins,'' one of them breathed. Another one of them made a fake moan and I threw a water balloon in his direction for good measure.
