[ WP ] Desperate to get out of the media spotlight regarding his rape allegations , Bill Cosby makes a deal with the Devil to get him out of his rut . But at a price ...

Bill hummed as he finished chalking the last of the pentagram, his hands shaking both with age and excitement. Under his breath he kept up a steady stream of nonsensical words and noise; it calmed him and allowed him to think clearly. 
 
 `` Beepabidy ba, a boo po dee dah dum.'' He finished the last of the chalk and began circling the complex lines with ceremonial sand. `` De skeedeeleb*aaaaaa*...'' For a moment he was stuck, head turned to the sky as he held the note, before he finally kicked it and continued pouring the sand. 
 
 ``... *aaaaaaadoop doo doo.'' He tossed away the now empty bag and took out a box of matches and carefully moved around the room, lighting the thirteen black candles and the three wicks dipped in animal fat. 
 
 In the centre of the room the goat baahed gently to itself and he absent mindedly pulled a couple of sugar cubes from his pocket, flicked one to the goat and then popped the other in his mouth. 
 
 `` Sugary candy dandy, mmmmmm *mmmm*.'' He licked his lips and then with hands on his hips turned slowly around the room. It was perfect. With the curtains drawn the room was dark, but there was enough light to see, he'd need it to read from the book. 
 
 He cleared his throat and began to read, chanting the incantations and whispering the words of power, which seemed to form i the air around him and then slither away into the dark corners. Page after page turned, the letters wiping from the book as he read and burning into nothing, but he pushed on, determined in his task. 
 
 Finally he turned the last page, wiping his sweaty palms against his chunky woollen jumper and reading allowed the last summons. `` Satan, mmmm hmmm, I summon you to me!'' The book snapped shut and Bill grinned, quietly adding on `` Like a nice puddin' pop.'' 
 
 Inside the chalk the floor seemed to bulge, rising like a pool, red and thick like blood; shaping itself into a form, a figure, a demon. A little over seven feet tall, it resembled a man who had been poorly constructed, odd muscles bulging and long thick genitals that Bill rather admired. 
 
 `` Who has summoned me from the eternal plains of darkness? Who dares bring me forth?'' Each word seemed to dig into Bill's brain and rot away some of his mind. He quite liked it. 
 
 `` Well howdy Satan, it's me, Bill Cosby. I summoned you up here as I want you to help me son.'' Bill smiled at the strange man, unworried by his odd appearance. 
 
 Satan took a moment but then nodded. `` Very well... Billl. You wish me to return things to the way they were when you were a respected entertainer?'' 
 
 Bill gaped for a moment. `` Well zippide doo sir, how the bipitty did you know that?'' 
 
 Satan rolled his eyes. `` I'm Satan Bill. But is this really what you want? Not to be young? Not to be powerful? You could have any woman, any life, any gift in return for your soul.'' 
 
 Bill waved him away. `` Nah, naaaaaah, I dont need not dangit women, I had all that I wanted. I just want me fringin, franging life back!'' 
 
 Satan nodded. `` There will be a price.'' 
 
 For the first time Bill seemed unsure, but he nodded. `` Take my soul and whatever else you want.'' He suddenly seemed old, finally looking his true age. `` I just want to be remembered as a good man... even if I bippity booped a few girls in my time.'' 
 
 Satan clapped his hands together and something seemed to pass out, into the world. `` It is done.'' 
 
 Bill looked around. `` Really? Well, that seemed... easy. I assumed there would be a more... complex set up circumstances, perhaps with some sort of odd ritual.'' 
 
 Satan shook his head. `` The price was paid, your soul, in every way.'' 
 
 Wrinkles passed on Bill head. `` Wait a gosh darn minute, what do you mean'every way'?'' He paused. `` Hey, why did I say'gosh darn'?'' He looked paniced. `` This is...'' he tried to force out a typical cosbyism, but they were gone, all his rambling, his noises, his weirdness. `` It's *wrong! *'' 
 
 Satan smiled, Bill had so very little and he only ever took what had value to a person. With another clap of his hands he was gone and the room returned to normal, light slipping in through the curtains and sand spilled out over the chalk lines. 
 
 Bill was shaking but managed to pick up his phone and his the dial button to call his agent. `` David? It's Bill, look, do we have any... uh huh, six bookings? Wow that's really good, I'm very pleased.'' A tear began to work its way down Bill's cheek as the words refused to come. `` I sound odd? No I'm fine, sure I'll be ready for stand up.'' He hung up and looked at the phone. 
 
 He slowly walked to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. `` Beep a doodle?'' It felt wrong. Slowly he sunk to the floor, his head in his hands, what had he done, what had he become? 

