[ TT ] The country you serve can only afford to field one soldier . World War III broke out , and this soldier finds himself in the thick of it .

`` Hey Sarge, who's that guy over there?'' 
 
 `` No clue Higgins, but our orders are to cooperate with him on the next attack.'' 
 
 `` Could he be the rep from that one place nobody's ever heard of?'' 
 
 The two soldiers approached the person in question. The stranger did appear to be a soldier, however his uniform was mismatched and disorganized. On one patch he wore the stars of a Major General, while the other bore the single bar of a Lieutenant. He carried at least three side arms, as well as a rifle slung on his back. In addition, he appeared to be talking to himself, rushing from one place to another in his tent doing various tasks. 
 
 `` Damn it Corporal, I wanted that coffee yesterday! Yes sir, right away sir. General! Recon reports enemy reinforcements to their position, estimates are around company strength. Captain! I want your company on the left flank as we move tomorrow. Somebody give me a status report on our forward outposts!'' 
 
 The man picked up one of the many pairs of binoculars laying around and peered toward the maze of trenches in front of him. The sergeant and Higgins both looked as well, and spotted what appeared to be straw men in uniform scattered within the defensive works. 
 
 `` Sir! The men seem to be lazing about, very few if any combat ready and their weapons all over the place. Damn! Get me the Lieutenant of that platoon, I'll have him court-martialed! General, reporting sir! Lieutenant, can you explain to me the condition of your platoon? Well sir the men are tired and- ``, the man proceeded to cut off and raise a pistol to his own head. 
 
 `` No excuses! Our army pride itself in discipline, therefore you are to be punished accordingly. You! What are the results of the investigation? Guilty as charged sir. Very well, the punishment in that case is death by firing squad!'' 
 
 As the two looked on in horror, the man proceeded to paint the tent canvas with the inside of his head. After a few moments Higgins leaned towards the sargeant. 
 
 `` You know sarge, I think this is one story I'm not gon na write home about.''
