[ WP ] HR departments across the nation start being literal when they `` terminate '' an employee .

Ricardo had been unemployed for 2 years ever since he was fired from El Pollo Loco for smoking meth in the bathroom and his girlfriend was fed up. `` If you do n't get a fucking job by the end of the month I'm kicking your sorry ass out!'' Maria had told him. That was two weeks ago. He had one week to find a job or he would be out on the streets. While browsing Craigslist he came upon an ad that piqued his interest. 
 
 New Position Opening up at Costo: 
 
 No experience required 
 Criminal record OK 
 Must be willing to get hands dirty 
 Must be willing to travel 
 Starting pay $ 100,000 
 
 Ricardo was almost sure the ad was a scam of some sort but he figured that he had nothing to lose so he sent them his resume. 
 
 `` What the fuck! Who's calling me at 7 AM?'' Ricardo looked at his phone. It said unknown number. He usually never answered calls from unknown numbers but he was curious to see who the hell was calling at 7 in the morning on a Saturday. 
 `` Hello who the fuck is this?'' `` Excuse me sir there is no need for profanity.'' The voice on the other end said in an extremely calm voice. `` I am from Costco and I am calling about the resume you submitted.'' `` Yeah? So like you want me to come in for an interview or something?'' Ricardo replied nervously.'' `` Something like that'' the man replied. `` I ca n't talk about the details over the phone, I'm going to give you an address and I need you to be there in one hour, can you do that?'' 
 `` Uh uh I guess so.'' Ricardo stuttered. `` Be there in an hour or the offer will be withdrawn. I'm serious, if you are 1 second late you wo n't be allowed in.'' `` Sir yes sir.'' Ricardo said sarcastically. `` This is not a joke son. 2121 Old Country Road. You better be serious when you get here.'' Before Ricardo could respond the man hung up. Ricardo laid in his bed for a moment wondering what he had gotten himself into. `` Why the hell ca n't he talk about it over the phone?'' He thought to himself. Ricardo was n't sure what he was getting himself into but he figured he might as well go check it out. 
 
 `` Where the fuck are they sending me, There's nothing out here?'' Ricardo said aloud as he pulled up to the gate of 2121 Old Country Road. He was correct, there was nothing there just a Gate and andsome farmland surrounded by an old barb wire fence. There was an intercom on the gate though. He pushed the button... 
 `` Hello, please state your name.'' The voice on the other end said. `` Ricardo Rodriguez.'' He was now getting more nervous and thought about turning around, but he really needed a job. The gate opened and Ricardo got back in his car and started down the dirt road. Ricardo had driven about 2 miles down the road before he noticed something in the distance. There was a small trailer just ahead. There was a small sign in front of it that said `` Welcome Ricardo''. Ricardo was now sure he was being led into a trap and was going to be raped or murdered. He reached into his glove box and grabbed his 9mm pistol. Once again he thought about turning around but Ricardo was not exactly known for making good decisions. 
 
 to be continued...
