[ WP ] Write the most elaborate , over-dramatic , and exciting story you can think of that all just turns out to be a set-up for a pun so horrible I 'll want to punch you

December 21st: 
 
 Humanity had spent years preparing for this moment. I watched from within the massive floating airship as flames ravaged the lands. God promised to never again destroy the world with water. Apparently fire was still free game. 
 
 Three years before the Superflare, every one of the world's governments united to create project A.R.K. The engineering is complex, but the project involved creating a series of aerial sanctuaries to save as many humans as possible. 
 
 I walked along the deck of the largest of them, the `` Noah.'' The exterior of the `` arc'' ( as the ships were called by the public ) was made of some material that insulated heat, keeping the interior safe from the raging heat outside. The wiring of the controls was somehow advanced enough to survive the barrage of x-rays that it was getting. 
 
 Most of the other passengers are looking at what used to be their homes through the viewport. Besides one guy who is laughing, all are silent, sorrowful, with the shadows from the giant flames playing across their faces. Their are about 5,000 of us on this ship. There are many more than that burning on the ground. 
 
 April 21st: 
 
 It's strange to think it's spring without there being green things growing on the ground. It is still barren from the Trial ( the religious folk started calling it that, and it caught on ). I saw a little girl with a flower pin in her hair the other day, and I almost cried. I suppose that life grows nevertheless. 
 
 June 21st: 
 
 Inside, most people seem to be getting along fine to life in the air. I tried Parasailing from the exterior ( a fairly common activity ), but the record heat chased me back. I suppose that I'll stick to the swimming pool. 
 
 September 21st: 
 
 Flu season. No one knows how the bug got in. There is plenty of medicine, but being sick is still miserable in such a contained space. It's spreading quickly and universally. The sounds of illness echo through the halls. It is difficult to sleep and eat. 
 
 I guess the bigger the Ark the harder the Fall.
