[ EU ] In this universe , Spider-man is , in fact a woman ! Describe `` Spider-girl '' trying to work up the courage to ask out Gwen Stacy .

`` Gwen, enough hitting the books. Let's hit the coffee shop... Can you hit a coffee shop? You can hit a bar... and it looks like I'm going to be hit by a...'' 
 
 Spider-Girl let go of her web line just in time for her to drop below the spinning blade. Spider-sense made it possible for Petra Parker to fight evil and practice social interactions at the same time. Still not a good idea, though. 
 
 `` They come to movies to be distracted! Pointless escapism! They wanted a horror film... I will give them a true nightmare!'' 
 
 A mist started to spread from the floor beneath Mysteria's boots. 
 
 `` Uh oh'' Spider Girl thought and then said out loud. 
 
 `` Mysteria's chemicals blocks my spider sense. Better keep your eyes on the prize Parker.'' Petra thought and then did not say out loud because... you know... secret identity. 
 
 The movie theater was mostly empty at this point. Spider-Girl swung down and grabbed the last teenager still standing in the aisle filming the super-villains attack with an iphone. 
 
 `` Hey buddy, maybe get clear of the danger before you try and film it,'' Spidey said hypocritically. Her camera was automatically taking pictures from the balcony. 
 
 As she placed the amateur Kubrick down by the exit she could hear Mysteria cackling in background. 
 
 `` What's so funn...'' Spider-girl started to say but then turned and got a face full of mist. The stupid, stupid spider-sense negating mist. 
 
 The mist had other effects. Petra felt disoriented. Mysteria fired another pair of blades. Our friendly neighborhood wall crawler dodged them but just barely... and clumsily. 
 
 `` Jonah's going to love these photos.'' Petra though, `` I look drunk.'' 
 
 `` Going to your head Spider Girl!'' Mysteria Bellowed, `` My chemically concoction is the most potent special effect there is. No CGI monsters or sticky corn syrup blood. It will show you what you are truly afraid of!'' 
 
 The Mistress of Illusion was correct. Spider-Girl looked around and everywhere she looked....she saw Gwen. 
 
 Gwen turning her down. Gwen refusing to make eye contact her. Gwen disgusted by her attraction. She approached the nearest illusion and it laughed at her. A cruel laugh that Petra had heard before from Flash Thompson and other simple minded bullies but never from Gwen. 
 
 Petra knew it was n't real but knowing that the movie is fake does n't always make it less scary because it reminds you of all the things there are to be afraid of. 
 
 She dropped to her knees. Mysteria approached through the fog. 
 
 Spider-Girl was terrified... but not petrified. She is the hero after all. 
 
 She casually pressed down on her web shooters from the ground. A glob of webbing coated Mysteria's dome helmet. 
 
 `` GAAAHHH! ``, Mysteria exclaimed. 
 
 `` Music to my ears.'' Spider-Girl said as she sprang from the ground. Landing two feet into the belly of evil. Mysteria dropped to the ground. Spider-girl landed a solid punch to the battery for her power suit and Mysteria collapsed under the weight of her own genius ( irony! ). 
 
 There was a knocking the wind out of her one liner there somewhere... or maybe something about having a gas... but Petra was n't in the mood. 
 
 It would have been difficult to find Mysteria in the fog but then Mysteria filled the room with sights that Petra did n't want to see. She had to close her eyes....and listen. 
 
 ********************** 
 
 Gwen sat outside the school, she was wearing headphones and had her nose in a chemistry book. 
 
 Petra approached. Her palms were sweating. She was shaking a little. Her Spider-Sense was n't buzzing but it really did n't understand what true danger was. It was putting yourself, who you are, out there for someone else to embrace or reject. 
 
 Petra was terrified... but not Petrified. She was the hero after all. 
 
 She walked straight up the Gwen, waited for her to take her headphones out and proudly said, `` Hey books, want to hit some coffee?''
