[ CW ] ( Love ? ) story that ends with `` Worst part is , I still love her/him . ''

`` Well, we were married you know? She was my wife, the mother of my daughter. 
 
 We met in church. Of course, with the two of us growing up in the back end of Georgia that was practically every day. Choir practice, study group, after-worship picnics. Friends, then best friends. First dance, first kiss, first break-up, first post-argument make up sex *laughs*, she was my first everything. We were white and black; I'd be volunteering at the local GOP district office, she'd prefer the direct approach and organized the local church groups into protests and sit-ins.She used to laugh and say we were dividing and conquering. 
 And then she got pregnant. The memory of her sublime wonder at the fuzzy lumps on her ultrasound, the soft sound of twin heart beats reverberating through tinny speakers, warms me to this day. 
 It was election year but I should have been there for her after... I should have been there. She always complained about me not being selfish enough with my time; I was really the only person she was generous with. 
 
 Latent sexism and insecurity issues. Led to abnormal projection of anger against her gender identity. The miscarriage broke something in her. If I'm honest, losing both of them might have almost been preferable than delivering one alive and one dead. 
 
 You know the story now, I left a wife and infant girl to woo voters and donors. I came back to my daughter and a husband, well, ex-but-not-divorced-wife, not at that point. At least she stuck around long enough to serve me the divorce papers personally. 
 
 So, I find myself with a political career that's basically torpedoed before it left harbor. An ex-wife in the truest sense of the term. A young daughter I have no idea how to care for. And a lot of uncomfortable questions to answer if I go back home. I'm frustrated, angry, embarrassed and about half a dozen other negative emotions all suppressed until I find a better time to freak out. 
 
 The worst part is, I still love her/him.'' 

