[ WP ] A story about a homosexual bear and his misadventures

Rabbit and Bear were tearing the forest apart with their fighting. 
 Smaller animals were becoming scared of the noise, and the larger animals were becoming irritated at the bickering. In an effort to bury the hatchet, Rabbit and Bear decided to go see Owl, as he was wise, and far more equipped to deal with conflict. 
 
 `` You are both far too selfish to settle your differences peacefully'' concluded Owl. `` So I shall grant each of you three wishes, in an attempt to satisfy your basic desires, and keep you occupied.'' 
 
 `` Rabbit, what is your first wish?'' he asked. 
 
 `` I WISH ALL THE BEARS IN THE FOREST WERE FEMALE, SO I COULD MATE WITH THEM ALL'' shouted Bear. He was n't about to let Rabbit get the first magic wish. 
 
 `` And so it is done'' said Owl, with a wave of his wing. 
 
 `` I wish I had a motorcycle'' said Rabbit, timidly. 
 
 `` Ah, a fine wish'' replied Owl. With a wave of his wing, there appeared the motorcycle of Rabbit's dreams. 
 
 `` Okay, forget the forest'' said Bear, `` I want every bear in the COUNTRY to be female, except for me.'' 
 
 Owl waved his magic wing, and sighed `` And so it is done.'' 
 
 `` Owl, could you make my motorcycle fly?'' Rabbit chimed. 
 
 Slowly, Rabbit's motorcycle began to levitate off the ground, before gently setting itself back down. 
 
 `` Now for your last wish Bear'' said Owl, `` How may I help you?'' 
 
 `` Okay, okay. Make- okay. Make EVERY BEAR in the ENTIRE WORLD a female, except me. That way, I'll be the last male bear on earth, and they'll ALL have to mate with me'' Bear said, between fits of hysterical laughter. 
 
 `` *Sigh* - and so it is done'' With one final wave of his magical wing, Owl made every other bear on the planet a female; destined to procreate with the one selfish male bear left in the world. 
 
 `` Now, Rabbit'' he said, `` Your final wish?'' 
 
 Rabbit climbed slowly onto his motorcycle. He gripped the handlebars, and really got a feel for the bike. He kicked up the stand, and started the bike with a magnificent roar. 
 
 Slowly rising from the earth, he turned the bike around to face Owl and Bear. 
 
 `` Make Bear gay'' He said, before flying off into the sunset 
 

