[ WP ] After the Dark Lord conquered the realm everything turns out really damn good .

Man, I tell ya... most folk just about lost their minds when the skies tore open and the Faceless God and the Giant Bleeding Skull That Never Stops Screaming decided that our little town was the best place to duke it out. 
 Now, do n't get me wrong. Some people *did* actually lose their minds, most noticeably that nice Sunday School lady who pulled her tongue out and sleeps in that pile of ruined cars out on the highway; but for the most part we all took it in stride. 
 Of course it took some getting used to. I mean, no one really welcomes change, especially if that change involves carnivorous multi-dimensional crustacean-like monsters that we affectionately call `` meat spiders''. Look, we all know time marches forward ( except on the corner of Lee Street and Main where it seems to be in a permanent stasis, or at least moving forward so slowly it's impossible to observe with a human eye ). 
 
 Do n't get me wrong... I'm not complaining! And may the Faceless God turn me inside out and throw me on the Dissident Pile if I were. 
 
 Things have actually improved in our quiet town since the Hour Of Our Destruction. 
 First of all, it's always a balmy 72 degrees! It's been 24/7 the perfect weather since reality opened up and destroyed any sane explanation for the universe like a schoolyard bully telling you the truth about Santa Claus. And do n't even get me started on the frequent rain of offal and what Mr. Barnes from the Piggly Wiggly calls `` Martian Tears''. Our Community Garden has never looked better. 
 
 It's true: the endless screaming from the Giant Skull That Never Stops Screaming takes some getting used to, but eventually you learn to drown it out. Like, if you lived next to an airport, except instead of airplanes taking off and landing, a giant, bleeding skull had replaced the moon and never stopped screaming. 
 
 I almost left out the best part! No one in the town borders has to work anymore! Who has time to put hours in at the hardware store when we're too busy being pawns in a game crafted by a relentlessly cruel and indifferent universe? `` Not I'', say me. 
 
 If you were to ask me if life's been better since the Giant Bleeding Skull That Never Stops Screaming and the Faceless God came to town... well, sir, I could only say yes. 
 It's the only answer the meat-spiders inside my mouth let me say. 
 

