[ WP ] It turns out that our universe actually is a simulation , but one that plays like an MMO . As humanity develops better weapons , the mods release bigger bosses . Humanity dealt with this challenge rather well until July 16th , 1945 : the day of the Trinity test .

`` Gentlemen, we have reached a crisis of unprecedented proportions.'' I cleared my throat, before turning to the screen. I clicked forward, bringing up a chart detailing dam versus def for the last few expansions. 
 
 `` As you can see here, we try to keep the enemies within a general range. The more damage humans can inflict, the more damage enemies can withstand. For the past three expansions, `` New World,'' `` War Economies'', and `` Aircraft,'' the only way this has been reasonable is through setting humans against humans.'' I pointed to each section in turn, showing how smallpox balanced the relatively small numbers of invaders, trenches balanced mass conscription, and air power balanced floating cities. 
 
 `` Now I will admit, we've has issues with the growth algorithms, I know how sad it was to need to remove the American spawns from the major factions list, but it has always worked out to some degree, and the challenge has always remained.'' I clicked the slide again. 
 
 `` Unfortunately, someone in programming misunderstood how large c^2 is.'' I pulled out a roll of red paper, which an assistant began to tape to the ceiling. 
 
 `` I thought that a logarithmic chart would understate how much of an issue this was, so I took some liberties. The entire Fascist vs Democracy faction war's energy output could be exceeded by a single clan's initial attack. Hell, it was only thanks to Garry's quick thinking to raise the fusion temperature of element 7 that the project is n't literally burning right now.'' 
 
 `` So?'' The vice president of marketing said, `` Just accelerate the next expansion.'' 
 
 `` Can concepts please tell us what the next major enemy was going to be?'' I responded. 
 
 `` Well, we were thinking of using some of those giant bones left over from project post-Cambrian, with a few tweaks to the base code, we could import a spawning site and let them run amok. There really is n't anything that is large enough to mess with the self-propelled smokeless cannons otherwise.'' A voice piped up from the back of the room. 
 
 `` And could testing tell us how effective those bosses will be?'' 
 
 `` Dude... we just dropped a few of those and it was awesome. The ground was glass for miles.'' 
 
 `` And what about the spawn sites?'' The marketing vp asked. 
 
 `` Dunno man, nothing came back from there.'' 
 
 `` Thank you, testing. For some reason, programming decided to make the weapon have multi-century poison effects in addition to citybuster explosive power. The closest thing we have in the pipeline to a viable enemy is introducing the Xeno simulation to this world, but that's at least a couple decades out. They're still stuck on sub-light travel, and a couple millennia until the next expansion wo n't solve anything. Unless we want to break canon by spawning them on planet five, we need to figure out something fast.'' 
 
 `` Does the Democracy faction have any defenses against the weapon?'' Someone asked. 
 
 `` Not that we know of, but they have enough land that it does n't really matter if they get hit a few times.'' I replied, craning to see who spoke. 
 
 `` Well, I think its pretty simple. Just reenact the Great Thermostat War.'' I finally spotted the Director of HR, smiling viciously. 
 
 `` I apologize, but I'm not familiar with that particular war.'' Garry from programming said. Surprising, considering his frankly scary obsession with the game's canon. 
 
 `` No, its not in game. Last year, someone in HR turned up the thermostat to 71 degrees. Then someone else turned it down to 65 in revenge. Every day, people would change it from the exact setting of 68 to increasingly wrong numbers trying to offset the revenge reset.'' She said primly. 
 
 `` So?'' I asked, fiddling with the clicker. 
 
 `` Eventually everyone agreed that no one could change the thermostat, because the alternative of sweaty clothes or constant shivering was too much to bear. It was mutually assured destruction for anyone to touch it.'' 
 
 `` I'm not sure if the bomb is powerful enough for that.'' 
 
 `` I think that the code will support a bomb a couple hundred times more powerful, and multiple warheads, and... oh this is going to be fun.'' Garry said, frantically scribbling. 
 
 `` Can we improve the inter-faction diplomacy menu to support this?'' 
 
 `` Should n't be that difficult. Most of the framework is there from the Alliance War.'' 
 
 I paused, thinking it over. `` I think that should work.'' 
 
 Cheering erupted from throughout the room. It quickly hushed as a figure from the head of the table pushed their chair back. 
 
 The CEO stood up. `` Fellow Game's masters, I think we have found the next boss. Let us begin the era of the War Against Player Nature.''
