[ WP ] Everytime someone has a 'blonde moment ' they get a little blonder . Black hair is now a symbol of brilliance , and you 've just invented hair dye .

The awkward box shuffled beneath Jack's coat as he continued wandering through aisles with an empty stare. This would fall under either pride or envy, he thought. Juggling between the Big Seven, Sloth came in third. He had been meaning to read a book or two. Eventually -- when he found the time. He shrugged as he decided it did n't matter. Either he'd walk out this store a conceited, vain but dumb man or in handcuffs. Jack's history as an accidental shoplifter reached legendary status on a few occasions. 
 
 He could n't shake the vision of his mother running a comb through her hair. Definitely blonde, golden even. Not so sure if it was as long as he remembered or had nostalgia turned it waist-length and curled? Things changed; peoples' attitudes changed. Their tastes never faded from fickle and cruel but that was towards other people. The guilt ran through him, *but towards other people* - as if that made it okay. 
 
 So he had n't finished a crossword puzzle lately or voluntarily sat through a documentary. Using the word'eclectic' to describe his taste in music passed in online dating profiles and work lunches. No need to remind anyone he could n't remember what it meant months after looking it up for the fourth time. His strong jawline and the dimple on his chin did the heavy lifting during bar crawls. Lately though, women craved depth, substance. Pulling it off with a headful of stark blond hair was impossible. The subtle hypocrisy of looking for something meaningful using the most superficial means made him smile. 
 
 Going to lengths to get laid was n't new to mankind. Hell, the species practically relied on a man's ability to convince a woman of his suitability. So what if it was n't always completely honest? Having a word-a-day calendar and perusing the arts section of the Sunday paper were enough to create witty phrases or drop an upcoming artist's name. `` Oh, his work is so jejune, but I admire his raw creativity'' never failed. 
 
 To complete the illusion he'd just have to dye his hair jet black. The ends justified -- damn, how did it go? He shoved his hand into his pocket only to realize he left his wallet at home. The glimpse of himself in a reflective end-cap near toothbrushes featured another prominent streak. It stared back like a slap to the face. Maybe two boxes when he came back, to be sure.
