[ WP ] You 're a rich , kindhearted , well meaning philanthropist with grand plans that will genuinely improve the world . However , you have all the mannerisms of a super villain . The costume , the monologues , the henchmen , the lair , etc .

ACT 1 
 
 
 Suffering... 
 
 ``....Papa, what ish a fewneral?'' 
 `` huh...? what is this about Adolf, all of a sudden?'' 
 `` I shaw it on TV, shomeone wash shleeping in a boxh!'' 
 `` I see...'' 
 `` Look Adolf, there comes a time in everybody's life, when people get very tired and go to sleep for a very long time. That's more or less what a funeral is.'' 
 `` But do n't worry son, it's not scary or anything. Like, after you get home from school and do all your homework, or after dinner when we play hero of justice and run around the house like crazy people.'' 
 `` By the end of the day you feel tired right? is n't it nice to sleep for a bit and recover your energy?'' 
 `` Ah, sho that'sh what it ish! shounds nice Papa. Can I have a fewneral too?'' 
 `` HAHA... you can eventually have one too Adolf. But there's many fun and interesting things for you to do and experience before that, so there is no need to worry about it now.'' 
 
 `` Sho when wirr the mishter on TV wake up?'' 
 `` heh....'' 
 `` When wirr he wake up to prlay again?'' 
 ``...'' 
 `` Well, huh... some people sleep longer than others, so you ca n't really tell, ahah.'' 
 `` Oh... sho he'sh lazy too? Like me?'' 
 `` Yeah... probably.'' 
 
 ________________________________________________________________ 
 
 That, was my first time facing the subject of death as a youngling. My father was a very Kind man, and could not find it in himself to impose the harsh reality of the world upon the bubbly personality of his happily ignorant son. Those careful fatherly words of his, allowed for my happy delusions of bunnies and rainbows to continue for a while longer, as I'm sure was his intention. 
 
 Then, there was this time.... 
 
 ________________________________________________________________ 
 
 `` Hey cutie, me and kiddo are going to see the tigers.'' 
 `` I'll be right behind, going to get us some ice cream!'' 
 `` Ahah! laugh while you can, evil mistress. For later tonight, I will be the one behind you!'' 
 `` uuuh, John... will you also do that... thing?'' 
 `` OHH, you bet I will, be prepared! be very prepared!'' 
 `` Ca n't wait...'' *Wink* 
 `` Darling, sorry to interrupt such heartfelt proclamation of your fiery desires, but Adolf is waiting for you...'' 
 `` Oh, right!'' 
 `` HEY ADOLF, WAIT UP!'' 
 `` Let's go son. Mom has a very important mission, so we must go first.'' 
 
 `` Hey dad, are there really white tigers here?'' 
 `` For sure, and I've read in the brochure they do this live feeding thing so the visitors can observe how tigers hunt in the wild, is n't it great?'' 
 `` Live feeding?'' 
 `` Yeah, you will understand it better when we get to see it.'' 
 `` Tigers are cool but dinosaurs are the best!'' 
 `` Dinosaurs? ahah, for sure they are! we'll go to a museum next time then, what do ya think?'' 
 `` Dad... you're awesome!'' 
 
 `` Hey Adolf, look there, it's gon na start!'' 
 `` What are they doing?'' 
 `` see that small cow there?'' 
 `` yeah.'' 
 `` They are going to put it inside the tiger's den so we can watch the tiger hunt.'' 
 `` Alive?'' 
 `` Yeah, that's the point son. it has something to do with simulating the tiger's natural environment. Like, in the wild they have to hunt to get food, so they are doing this so the tiger feels more at home.'' 
 `` But, what about the cow?'' 
 `` What about it son?'' 
 `` wo n't it hurt? Wo n't it be painful to be hunted by the tiger?'' 
 ``...'' 
 ``.......'' 
 `` yeah... it probably will...'' 
 `` We must stop them Dad!'' 
 `` Sorry Adolf, I understand what you mean, but even if we tried I'm afraid we could n't stop them.'' 
 `` We must try Dad! HEY DAD! please!'' 
 `` They are going to hurt it if we do n't do anything! DAD!'' 
 `` Come on Adolf, do n't look.'' 
 `` And that's enough of this, hey buddy, let's sit in that bench while we wait for mom to come with our awesome ice cream, what do ya say?'' 
 `` Hum...'' *Sniff* 
 
 `` Sorry you had to witness that, you are a very Kind a gentle boy, that's something you should be very proud of.'' 
 `` I... I hate tigers. And People...'' 
 `` You see Adolf, the tiger needs to eat meat to survive, he ca n't eat anything else... it's not a choice the tiger can make. I know it's unfair, but we ca n't change nature.'' 
 `` And the people, they need to work to feed themselves and their families too... and sometimes their jobs may require them to do not very nice things.'' 
 `` Both people and animals have a few basic needs that need to be fulfilled to live, and unfortunately that usually means interfering with the needs of others. It's a sad truth of nature.'' 
 `` Dad... I do n't want to eat meat like the tiger anymore, can people do that?'' 
 ``...'' 
 `` I believe we can make that work son.'' 
 
 
 `` Hey lovely boys, did I make you wait long? sorry, the queue was huge!'' 
 `` Here, Lime for my insatiable stallion and Chocolate for my gluttonous son.'' 
 `` What happened though? I thought you guys would be a the tiger's den. Thank goodness you were n't far off, or I might have missed you.'' 
 `` Cutie, take a seat. You wo n't believe what happened, but you're going to be a proud mommy by the time I finish telling you.'' 
 `` Oh, I like where this is going, what were my boys up to?'' 
 
 _______________________________________________________________ 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

