[ WP ] Write the most elaborate , over-dramatic , and exciting story you can think of that all just turns out to be a set-up for a pun so horrible I 'll want to punch you

I was just a normal boy, until that fateful day. 
 It was Jan 13 at night, the year 2015. My girlfriend just broke up with me 
 so i had to go for a walk..i just needed to clear my mind. 
 
 I walked around the block and began to look up towards the night sky. 
 `` Gosh the stars look so beautiful today.'' It made me completely forget about that slut. 
 
 Anyways i noticed something strange in the sky. Yes this was the moment my life changed, the day that would change the way i saw the world! 
 It was a green light with hints of purple, bright as a miniature sun, I began to wonder why it was getting bigger 
 
 Then it hit me.
