[ WP ] In a world full of crime and lawlessness you decide to become a hero . Your power ? You can ' lose .

Every superhero has some kinda backstory. Superman came from some alien planet, Batman's some rich kid who lost his ma and pa. I'm pretty damn sure someone got dropped in radioactive sludge, but your guess is as good as mine there. I did n't have any radioactive sludge, and I'm damn happy to be cancer free. I'm gon na tell you what I suspect. This is something I've never told anyone, not even my ma. I'd expect her to lose her head laughin' if I told her. But, I think God wants order. I think He never wanted *this* to happen. No government bigger than a few hundred square miles. More bandits than people to defend from them. It's like somebody gave the world rabies and it's gone mad. Naw, God wants order, and I am His order made manifest. Now, I ai n't got ODC, or whatever, so I'm not that kind of order. The order I bring is that I win. Plain and simple. No chaos or rabies or nothing if that's it. I'm not no crazy either. I've met more'n my fair share of crazies round here who call themselves angels or chosen ones. I've taken Fiat as my name, and right here's my story. 
 
 My pa told me this one, makes him laugh like no other. When I was born, the midwife picked me up to spank me. But, I or whatever force a'nature that's got my back decided that was n't gon na happen. So she moves to hit my behind but she misses, knocks herself right out. I did n't get dropped, neither. Landed right on top of the poor lady, comfy as can be. Cause Fiat ai n't lose nor get hit, not by nobody. 
 
 Ai n't never been sick before, neither. Back when the shakepop was spreading I did n't get it. ( We called it that cause if you got it first you shook then you threw up and leaked some nasty stuff outa your ears, nose, and eyes. Like if you shake a bottle of pop. Shakepop. Fuck off, nobody thought my name was no good neither but I'm sticking by it. ) Damn near got half the town, and finished off a good quarter of'em. Well, after two or three sicknesses pulled through the town and I still did n't get sick, people thought something was up. They saw I was n't average. I did n't get sick. So they put me on fucking clean up duty. Somebody throw up? Get Fiat to pick it up, he wo n't get sick. Somebody get sick and die? Fiat. Wan na see if the gun somebody found'll shoot or explode or what? Fiat. You'd best bet this piper got paid, cause ai n't nobody that's got one up on Fiat. 
 
 People started thinkin' something was real off durin the lotto. See, if we find somethin that nobody's got any real claim to, we draw a lotto. I was in the lotto five times. I won five times in a row, out of some 300 people. They wised up soon, took my name out, and gave me something every 300 or so lottos to make it fair. 
 
 Here's the damned best proof I do n't lose. I've had a gun to my head three times. Two over a girl ( the same ) and the third over food several days deep into the desert. First one nearly made me shit me pants. Real mean guy, knew me for years but was gon na kill me like a hog. So he shoots, and I'm cradling my head and crying, saying some prayer to God or ma or both. He's lookin' at me and I look up, and now we're both staring at each other. He shoots again, and I flinch real hard. But, still nada. He empties his clip and I got this me shaped outline of bullet holes. When he and I realized his gun did n't work on me, I chased him around town, whooping his sorry ass. Do n't tell me he was a shitty shot, though. I've seen this guy hunt. The second time, he drops the gun, and the third time the gun turned out to be a very convincing plastic gun. Made the other guy piss himself, cause according to him it had shoot well just two days ago. 
 
 So, Fiat do n't lose but that do n't mean everybody ca n't lose. We got plague, famine, war, and more death than we need around here. Ma and pa died when I was 19. Bandits, and if it were n't bandits it woulda been sickness eventually. I gutted those rabbits and brought back what they stole. But you ca n't steal back lives, not from bandits anyhow. It's not about lettin' someone fuck you up and getting revenge. It's about making sure no one fucks you up. So, while I'm always safe, I'm making damn sure everyone else is too. That's why I'm going as far as I can walk, talking to everybody that'll listen, uniting every city, town, and hermit I can find. We got ta unite, push the bandits out, and then we're good. Then we got order so we can stop the sickness, stop the wars, stop the famines, stop the deaths. The four horsemen done came, but we can tell'em to leave. So, what say you? You and me, your town and my town, let's work together.
