[ WP ] You 've just been found guilty of murdering the man who killed your pet cat . Make your final statement to the judge - who can sentence you to time served or the death penalty .

Mike couldn ’ t listen anymore to the overwhelming evidence presented before the judge, so he tuned them out and thought about the true events of that night. It wasn ’ t even six, spaghetti noodles were boiling on the stove, and he was going through bills at the kitchen table. It was summer, so the sky was only just beginning to darken. His daughter, Cathy was outside. He called through the window for her and after the second call with no reply, he was dashing out of the house in a panic. 
 
 Cathy was curled into a ball on the side of the road, dark red spots pooled on the tar covered skid marks that drew his eye to the ’ 79 Cutlass in the ditch. No driver in sight. Mike ’ s mind had gone into overdrive as he ran to his daughter ’ s side, trying to assess the damage “ Cat, Little Cat, ” he had whined, turning his daughter over, “ Cathy? Can you hear me? ” 
 
 Slowly one green eye opened. She looked at me and smiled. Mike ’ s stomach dropped in relief, she was not dead. But there was so much blood! Mike ’ s stomach flipped and dropped again, tightly clenched to her body was our cat Pancakes. Pancakes lay limp and broken in her arms. The blood belonged to the cat. Cathy must have saw what happened and ran over to our cat, trying to protect him even though he was already dead. 
 
 Mike then took the blood soaked cat away from the girl and told her to go back up to the house and turn the stove off before the water boiled over. Meanwhile he got the shovel out from the garage and walked to the public trail entrance near the empty ’ 79 Cutlass. 
 
 He hadn ’ t thought it was odd that whoever ran over Pancakes just left his car and vanished, because he was busy digging a hole in the little patch of woods. He was nearly finished when something caught his eye, he had to do a double take and pinch himself at the sight of a human hand laying in the bush. 
 
 Cautiously he walked over to find a man, barely concealed by some brush, still bleeding out – but clearly dead. A large indent in his head crushed in his eye socket. Near his body was a pink, child-sized, Barbie baseball bat. It was then that his neighbor came running by on the trail and saw the mangled cat, a dead guy, and Mike holding a shovel and bloodied Barbie baseball bat. 
 
 This was what Mike hated about the whole system, not the loopholes that allowed murderers to get away scot-free, but finding out people you love are bat-shit crazy. 
 
 “ Your Honor, ” he quickly interrupted, “ I plead guilty. ” Then again, he was just as insane... 
 

