[ WP ] You meet a genie that grants one wish . You wish to go back in time and change your biggest mistake . You get taken back to the time right before you made your wish .

The golden lamp glistened sweetly, like caramel candy left too long under a summer sun. 
 
 I rubbed it. There was a flash, a loud bang, and then a tremendous cloud of purple smoke which coalesced into a colossal humanoid form. *Aha, * I gleefully surmised, peering expectantly at the creature. *A genie! * 
 
 `` Human!'' the genie roared. `` You will set me free! According to the ancient accords, you may have one -'' 
 
 `` Well -'' I interjected. `` I already have it. Let me go back in time and change my biggest mistake.'' 
 
 I had actually thought for a long, long time about this subject before searching for the lamp, you see. After hours of deliberation, I realized this request was the best I could ever make. And so... 
 
 `` Human!'' the genie rumbled. `` You will set me free! According to the ancient accords, you may have one wish.'' 
 
 *Ah, shit. * 
 
 `` No wishes,'' I shouted. `` Nothing I say, think or do either now or in the future will constitute a wish made to *you, * you malicious backstabbing sonofabitch.'' 
 
 The genie stared. Then it glowered. `` Well, fuck you too,'' it finally managed, slinking back into the lamp. 
 
 I let out a dry chuckle. `` Feeling's mutual.'' 
 
 At this point you might think this is where I throw the lamp away - but no, I'm not the type to take chances. I hid it carefully. On the next day I returned with a cement mixer and tossed the little golden pitcher of pure evil into said mixer, stirring carefully. On the following day I loaded the mixer onto my pickup and drove all the way to the nearest harbor, and a week after that, I rented a boat and dumped the mixer into the deepest part of the ocean I could find. 
 
 To this day, I imagine that furious but helpless genie still rages on, encased in a block of cement at the bottom of the sea.
