[ WP ] How to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich

On first glance, it's just a sandwich. Ordinary, plain white and square, sat passively on the plate. From factory to supermarket to kitchen, it has lived mostly a short and non-eventful existence. 
 
 But it is not *just* a plain sandwich. It is clearly more. What goes into a sandwich? Not just flavours, spreads and condiments and the like, but passions and endeavours and feverish culinary revelations that keep you up late into the night. 
 
 The sandwich-maker, then, is not simply an amateur assembler. They are in fact a philosopher and a romantic artist. The bread, their canvas; the knife, their paintbrush; the peanut butter and jelly their paint; and the final sandwich borne of their flowing, fertile intellect. 
 
 One thing is clear, that a true PBJ sandwich -- for, like any great achievements, there are imposters -- must have clean cut white bread, firstly. Anything seedy or wholemeal or brown is heretical. 
 
 Second, there is much contention over the texture of the nut butter spread: smooth or crunchy? The former is easy to digest but the latter provides some much-needed texture. 
 
 Lastly, the genre of jam seems quite obvious. It has to be strawberry, no? Variations such as raspberry, blackcurrant or oddities like apricot or passionfruit, god forbid, are just passing fashions. 
 
 Although the consistency of peanut butter is less clear-cut, the ontological basis of the PBJ sandwich is most definitely soft, clean and simple white bread and sweet and wobbly strawberry jam. 
 
 Some doubters might suggest that the peanut butter and jelly sandwich is nothing but a snack. The fodder for the busy office-worker's lunch or a quick bite for the bedroom-dwelling teenager in-between video-game sessions. 
 
 But it is so much more! The peanut butter and jelly sandwich is based in a mode of thought that goes back to antiquity. A thousand-year old Eastern philosophy of yinyang underpins the idea and creation of this soft and delicious work. Complementary forces unite and comprise all life-forces; the sweet twang of slightly acidic jam cuts through a nutty-sweet, slightly oily-salty peanut butter. These two bed-partners make love on a pillow of silken bread that climaxes in between teeth and tongue. 
 
 It is not too much a stretch to that the PBJ sandwich embodies the Wagnerian *Gesamtkunstwerk*, `` total artwork''. The concerto of the click of an opening jar; the cinematographic composition of spread upon bread then bread again; the splatter and fusion of colours of pinkish red and bronze and the final performance of the snack's soliloquy inside your mouth. As your teeth close, the curtain calls. The sandwich is proud, majestic, transcendent. 
 
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 Edit: ( Missed out a sentence ) and also this is my first post, just thought I'd announce myself and say hello. Hopefully I will be hanging around a bit more in coming weeks and months. I had fun writing this!
