[ WP ] She 's safe in the fire .

`` Sorry I guess does n't really cut it here, does it?... It's true though. I am so sorry. You were perfect to me, you know. Shit, yeah, you know. Thing is I did n't know. 
 
 Do you remember how we met? I do. We went to School together. You were 3 years younger, I never knew you existed. But as you always told me, you knew me. What was it, I was uhh...'Interesting lookin' guy' as you say. To this day I believe that is the polite way of saying'weird'. I'll take it though, I was weird. First time we properly met was at a shitty local club. I was tanked off my mind off 12 bourbon and cokes in 3 hours. I just got out of that bad break up, and I saw you. And fuck did I see you. You looked so flawless that night. It was a rare situation, I actually had the courage to say hello. I got your number that night. It felt great. 
 
 Course I did n't do shit with it because as soon as I sobered up, I started crying about Cassidy leaving me. That took a while. Few months later, I call you, you say you're busy, nothing happens. Few more months, still. I think it was about 8 later you invited me to a party. I go, It's like... 6 people? Shit I felt awkward. You got drunk off Vodka and Redbull and I got really drunk off Tequila. I still remember being much more intoxicated with the way you'd say my name. You always said it so marvelously. Always put a little upbeat on the end. 
 
 Shit, 3 months later, we're dating! It was so fun. We'd lay around and get high on shitty weed, watch the worst horror movies we could find. Dance outside at night, get eaten alive my mosquito's, complain the next day, do it all over again. I was still pretty depressed though. Never really got over Cassidy and I rushed into this hoping you'd take my mind off her. You did, to a degree, but. But I guess people like me have a really tough time getting through this life. So I lied about everything, you believed it all because you're a nice person, and I sabotaged myself from the start. 
 
 I took two years of your life and gave you nothing, Erica. I was the definition of awful to you. But you loved me so much. At the time I, fuck, I, think I resented you. Now all I wish is that you were still mine. Never know what you got till it's gone hey sweetheart?...'' My voice trailed off as I heard someone murmur behind me. 
 
 `` You've said goodbye, mate. Time to sit down''. 
 
 I turned to see a face I did n't recognize, or maybe I did, I just did n't care in the moment. I could n't think or see straight, but I understood the words. I shifted away and sat down once more and prepared myself for the long ordeal. 
 
 After what felt like days of Eulogy's, it all came to an end. I sat, sobbing quietly, as they took your coffin and ushered it into the crematorium. The pain tore into my chest, like a blunt knife eviscerating my veins, as I saw you leave once more. Except, I knew this time was for the best. You were finally away from me. No more drunk late nights of regret. No more threatening suicide just to have you back. No more nightmares in the daylight because of me. 
 
 **You were finally away from me. ** 
 
 You were safe in the fire.
