[ WP ] A day in the life of someone who teleports whenever they sneeze .

The weather change caught James of guard. He went from a spring time breeze to having cold and violent rain drops crashed on his crooked nose, bare chest, and against the sensitive part of his neck that dark curly hair didn ’ t protect. This was better than the pollen rolling in from the outskirts of Birmingham. He was used to the unexpected by now; with his condition he didn ’ t have a choice. Cars sputtered by, taking him away from the frustration of his mind. It was time to figure out where he was now and worry about what to do later. A few things became apparent after a simple glance at his surroundings: He wasn ’ t in Birmingham anymore, the homeless people that called the alley was in ‘ home ’ definitely saw him appear out of nowhere, and he was sprawled out in some restaurants old garbage. He shot up, pulling the purple robe over his broad, bare chest tightly. What a time to sneeze, right when you ’ re getting ready for bed. 
 
 “ When was I ever in a frickin ’ alley, anyway? ” he grunted to himself angrily. “ If I knew I was going to be afflicted with this... this... *allergy*, maybe I would ’ ve made less drug related choices. ” 
 
 He trudged out of the pile of black garbage bags and attempted to avoid eye contact with the gawking alley-dwellers as he made his way toward the bustling street ahead. If he played it cool, and if they were druggies like he hoped, they might think it was a really bad trip. At least it was a stormy night. The nastier the night, the less likely people are to notice someone rummaging through closed down stores or temporarily unoccupied apartments. He learned that early on, when his affliction began making itself know. Eventually being thrown into a time and place that you didn ’ t remember became a simple scavenger hunt and a ‘ hurry up and wait ’ act. Wait for another allergen to rustle your nose hairs and POOF! New time, new place. If he was lucky, a well-known time or place. Tonight he was not so lucky. 
 
 “ Did... Did you just teleport into that garbage...? ” asked the shaky voice of a girl from the sidewalk. 
 
 He barely heard the question as he rushed around the corner of a building that disappeared into the weeping clouds. 
 
 “ Hey!! I saw you -- “ The voice said, more confident, before James crashed into her. 
 
 They tumbled to the ground together, splashing through the puddles that surrounded them, before landing in a pile of `` *ooph*'''s and `` Ow!'' ’ s. Suddenly James ’ s lanky limbs were being tugged, caught in the straps of grocery bags that the girl was carrying as she attempted to free her belongings. 
 
 “ Hey, man! ” She shrieked, “ I was just going to make sure you were cool! There ’ s no need to take my shit! ” 
 
 “ I ’ m not! ” He grumbled, looking at her for the first time with a glare. “ I ’ m stuck because you were in my way, damn! ” 
 
 “ Then stop moving so I can get my bags... GOD! Just hang on... You ’ re making it worse! ” 
 
 Finally James slumped down into the wet, cracked sidewalk and tried to avoid the judging eyes of new onlookers that definitely weren ’ t homeless. By the business-professional types that passed them and the unbelievable amount of sleek cars, monstrous buildings, yellow taxi cabs, and snobby looks that he could see, this had to be during his small and drug-riddled time in New York City. If he had to go somewhere he used to be or somewhere he would *eventually* be, he at least wanted the ability to decide which ones were definitely not worth revisiting. This would be on the list. Between this and the days of prepubescence, he ’ d go anywhere else. 
 
 “ Dude. You ’ re weird. ” The girl snapped him out of his mind with a gentle but stern kick to the shoulder, “ Ya ’ just gon na lay there half naked in the rain, or are you goin ’ to take a helping hand. I ’ m not usually very givin ’, so if you don ’ t take up the offer soon I ’ m out. ” 
 
 He looked at her incredulously. Now that he was really seeing her for the first time since they had clashed, she seemed familiar. Something about her cropped golden hair and striking almond eyes brought a flash of this time back. Her eyebrows were pushed together, making all of the freckles between them one big blob, and her thin lips were pressed together in irritation. Grocery bags were draped on her slender arms, except for the one he heard rip as they went down, which she cradled to her flat chest. Her foot was making ripples in the puddle next to his hand as she tapped her foot impatiently. 
 
 “ You want... you want to *help* me? You don ’ t even know me, ” he said, getting up finally, “ I could be a psycho killer or a druggie looking for something to steal. ” 
 
 “ Well, you ’ re not really making a good case for yourself. ” She said, rolling her eyes, “ I think if you were either of those things, you wouldn ’ t be in boxers and a robe with one nasty slipper on. You live around here? I can help you get back home if your lost. Heck, *I* get lost here all the time and I ’ ve been here three years. ” 
 
 “ Uh, I don ’ t think I live here... I don ’ t remember. ” This was new to James. People that were around when he plopped down after a sneeze usually weren ’ t looking to help him. Not since he stopped flashing back to a time when he had family. 
 
 “ Well... you can ’ t stay out here like that. You ’ re going to get sick. I got ta go do my nightly ritual. Wait here. ” 
 
 The girl disappeared into the alley as James found himself lost in the deepest part of his muddled memory. He found himself there more and more often, trying to figure out what brought on the teleport-sneezing. One night he was having a nice dinner with his family, picking on his younger sister. The next he was in the hospital, Mom and Dad hovering over his bed with worried creases running through their foreheads. They said he passed out suddenly. Their story was that he stood up from the table, then his eyes rolled back and he started rocking back and forth until his head crashed into the rustic metal table. That was it. They took him home three weeks later and another week after that it started. He was on the way to school, bumping along the usual bus route at a ripe sixteen when a sneeze took him away. He pushed the memory out of his mind and looked down the alley at the unknown girl. 
 
 She was soaked from her black tank top down to the cuff of her worn blue jeans but the chill in the rain didn ’ t seem to upset her. She cautiously approached the alley-dwellers and placed saran wrapped meals near them with a timid smile. It looked like sandwiches and a different vegetable each. Some had carrots, some had celery. He watched her curiously with budding respect. When she was done she retreated from the dank alley with a few less bags and stress in the recesses of her eyes. 
 
 “ Come on. I ’ m taking you to my apartment. If you try to take any of my shit, I swear... I ’ ll cut you. ” She said abruptly. He could tell she meant it by the fierceness that shared a space with the stress in her gaze. He wasn ’ t going to ask any questions, he didn ’ t really have a choice. “ Then, if I don ’ t find the need to have a knife, you ’ re going to tell me how the hell you magically appeared in that garbage. If it ’ s what I think, maybe I can help... OH! My name is Kori. ” 
 
 “ I ’ m James... ” 

