[ WP ] Write a touching eulogy for someone you hate .

My father will be missed. He may not have been traditionally perfect, but he was still my dad and he loved me. I never doubted for a minute that he loved me. When he was drunk or sober, furious or happy, he cared about me. I wish I had realized that when I was younger. 
 I wish things could've been different. I know religious people say everything happens for a reason, but it still would have been nice to have had my actual dad around; even for a little bit. Sure, I saw him on the weekends and during the supervised visits, but that's not how a father should see his son. 
 He never got to teach me how to ride a bike. He never taught me the right way to throw a baseball. When I started dating, I had no idea how to talk to women. I still ca n't ride a bike or toss a ball to save my life. And my love life is one hell of a comically tragic story. I do n't blame him for these things; I just wish he could've showed me. 
 I know my dad hurt a lot of people. He was lazy like me. He slept for days, and drank and smoked every moment he was awake. He broke everyone's heart that was foolish enough to allow him to. And he hurt my mother more than anyone. The physical, emotional, and verbal abuse that she thought she deserved caused her pain long after she cut him out of her life. And you may hold these things against him today as you look at him with spite and pain. 
 But I have spent years being bitter towards the man in this coffin. I have hated him for his drinking, lying, abusive abandonment for all of my life. And now I can see him for what he really is; my dad. 
 My dad made mistakes. But everyone does. He had his addiction, and his laziness. But he was a human. And he truly was a big hearted man. When he was sober, he was a funny smart ass old fart. And I will remember him that way when I think back to him in the future. 
 But above all else, my dad helped me most when he was hurting me. Every time he broke my heart, I learned a valuable life lesson. When he did n't show up to my events when he said he would, I learned to stand by myself when I must. When he stayed with his family members for years because he could n't support himself, I learned the importance of self control. And when he ruined his own life with alcohol, I swore off the drink for my entire life. So my dad was n't perfect. But I'd say I turned out alright. And I would n't be the man I am today without him there. 
 I will one day have children and will find new ways to teach the lessons he taught me, without the influence of alcohol. But I'll also do some of the same things he did. I'll take my kids to feed old bread to the ducks at a local pond like we used to. And I'll buy my kids hotwheels once a week. And I'll tell them as often as I can how much they matter to me and how much I love them. I really wish my dad could have met his grandchildren. But it's okay. Because they'll know about him. They'll know that he was a good guy that had troubles. They'll know he loved me and always thought about me. And they'll know that I loved him and was always proud that he was my dad. 
 I'll really miss you, Greg. Thank you for the good times and the bad times. I hope we somehow see each other again some day, old man. Rest in peace, dad.
