[ wp ] Sob story movie monologue

`` My dad never abused me. Not like *that* anyway. He just left. He rang the doorbell of the woman who lived across the street from my grandmothers house, and left me in diapers on their front porch. I wish that would have been the last time we saw each other. He sent the child support checks. A point of pride he often relayed to me years later. I never saw much of that money though. My crazy mother spent it all on bullshit baubles and trinkets she bought at yard sales and flea markets. I wish I could say my mother was a drug addict and spent it all on dope. Sounds crazy but at least I'd have a better excuse for being how I am today. No it was my dad. I never wanted the money I wanted a father. All I got was him dangling the carrot in front of me my entire life. Insinuating the promise of a father, just never delivering. I always thought that so many kids had it way worse than me. That's true, but tons had it better too. And it does n't seem that bad, but it made me seek out that father figure in *all* the wrong places. So when that older kid with all the experience and authority offered me my first hit of dope I took it. The answer to all my problems. It was n't long before *I could not stop*. So looking in all the wrong places for someone to show me the way and explain how the world works is how I found the worst person for the job. Instead of the father I really needed... and that's why I am the way I am today.''
