You 've just killed Santa in your living room mistaking him for a burglar . Any moment your wife and three kids are going to wake up and come down stairs for Christmas [ WP ]

`` What?'' 
 
 `` Got to get going, dear, or we'll miss Christmas!'' 
 
 `` What? It is Christmas, is n't it?'' 
 
 `` No! Not here. We've got to really celebrate this year!'' 
 
 `` What? What time is it?'' 
 
 `` Come on, up and at em -- get dressed, we're heading out to -- to celebrate! I'll get the kids.'' 
 
 `` What's going on?'' 
 
 `` Come on, sweetie, we're up, we're going -- it's Christmas!'' 
 
 `` Can we open presents?'' 
 
 `` Yes, but no! Not now. Later!'' 
 
 `` What, Daddy?'' 
 
 `` Never mind, I'll explain it as we go. We've got to get going. Everybody's up now. Get dressed, we're leaving!'' 
 
 `` Okay.'' 
 
 He paced at the top of the stairs, keeping his family away from the scene by force of will. 
 
 `` Okay, great, everybody ready?'' 
 
 `` I guess so.'' 
 
 `` Not that way! This way.'' 
 
 `` What?'' 
 
 `` Out the windows! We're leaving Santa-style!'' 
 
 `` What are you talking about?'' 
 
 `` Nobody goes down the stairs.'' 
 
 `` What?'' 
 
 `` I said out the windows! We'll go get breakfast somewhere, but we ca n't got downstairs.'' 
 
 `` Why not?'' 
 
 `` Honey, you have to trust me! Let's go, I'll go tie some bed sheets together. Let's go, people!'' 
 
 He tied the sheets and had the window open in Kimmy's room. A blast of freezing darkness swept in and they all stood there shivering. 
 
 Wait, someone was missing. 
 
 `` Paul?'' he asked. `` Has anyone seen Paul?'' His heart sank. In a moment he was down the stairs and crashing toward the Christmas tree in front of the fireplace. `` Paul!'' 
 
 `` Is that who I think it is, Daddy?'' 
 
 `` Paul, I did n't want you to learn it like this.'' 
 
 `` Daddy, somehow I always knew.'' 
 
 The rest of family had gathered behind the pair. All stood aghast, staring at the gray face stuck within the red suit. 
 
 `` Oh my god, Frank.'' His wife looked at him. `` It's you.'' 

