[ WP ] You attend a speed dating event . To your surprise , every single one of the potential dates is an ex of yours .

“ Jenine? ” 
 
 “ Oh, hi there Freddy. Uh, how have you been? ” 
 
 “ Well, uh…kinda good, I guess. I ’ m doing my internship now; was able to focus on my studies after we split. Was a little bit pissed when you left me for the Manny in HR. How ’ s that working out for you? Leave him for the guy in Accounting? ” 
 
 “ You don ’ t have to be such an asshole, you know. No wonder why I left you. Bastard. ” 
 
 `` Whore.'' 
 
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 There was a trend going on here. And Freddy didn ’ t like it. 
 
 “ No Collette, I never did anything with that piece of white trash. Why do you still assume that I ’ m some kind of man-whore? ” 
 
 “ Gina, why are you here? I thought you were happily married with Henry now? Oh, you ’ re lesbian? Wow, uh…you ’ re not bi? You ’ re sure? Sorry, okay I get it. Yeah, it was nice seeing you again, I guess. ” 
 
 The only ex he met tonight that he genuinely liked was now lesbian. Go figure. 
 
 “ Mattie? No, Collette is not the French tramp that I ran off with. She ’ s the paranoid French girl that reminded me too much of the relationship we had in high school. Other than that, she was at least better in bed. Oh yeah, I went there. ” 
 
 He completely avoided ex number five. 
 
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 “ Freddy? ” 
 
 “ Hi Megan. If you ’ re wondering why I ’ m not surprised, it ’ s ‘ cause I ’ ve had a hell of a night. ” 
 
 “ Let me guess, you met a bunch of other exes tonight? ” 
 
 “ Actually all of them were. Wait, how did you know that? ” 
 
 ‘ Earth to idiot, I ’ m your wife…and I possibly have also had the same experience tonight. I think we both agree that we ’ re just perfect for each other. Let ’ s not divorce. Now just take me home and let ’ s get hopelessly drunk and have passionate sex. ” 
 
 “ Agreed. ” 
 
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 `` So kids, that ’ s how you were conceived. That ’ s why we know for sure you guys are Valentine babies. 
 Oh yeah, sorry, I mean, that ’ s how your mother and I saved our marriage.'' 

