[ WP ] After a bad breakup , you take Reddit 's famous advice . Lawyer up , hit the gym , delete Facebook . The problem ? You are Mark Zuckerberg .

Zukerberg, deprived of his previous media chooses to try a new avenue. The billionaire downloads the app he swore he would never give into, the enemies app, Twitter. 
 
 Upon logging on he sees that in this real-time world of ADD, that only one person has bothered to contact him. That one person was Kanye West. Kanye had apparently'tweeted', a term Mark was unfamiliar with, multiple times requesting a grand total of one billion dollars. 
 
 Troubled by the leaving of his beloved wife, and on the brink of midlife crisis, Mark decided to do the one thing he never imagined doing. 
 
 After a six hour phone call with Mr. West, Mark was sold and jumped on his private jet to meet Ye in Chicago. Here is was where he and Yeezus founded the greatest billionaire tax haven they could create, the church of Ye. 
 
 Together this religion spread like wildfire, as Kanye rapped of his newfound glory, while Mark used his Facebook money to send missionaries to all the nations of the world. In a matter of years the world had adopted the teachings of Ye. 
 
 This church had no beloved text, but beloved song as they gathered around the greatness of Yeezus, and The Life of Pablo. For years the message spread wide and far, until one day when the worshipped Yeezus was assassinated by whom other, than a belated Taylor Swift. 
 
 Knowing her days of teen pop and sickening music were long forgotten, Taylor kidnapped Kanye and let him starve to death in a room with barren walls and her lost album'1989' on repeat. Fortunately for Kanye, Saint West was able to avenge Kanye's death by hacking Taylor's Facebook profile. 
 
 `` Wait One Second'' Said a confused Zuckerberg. Feeling a hand on his shoulder, Mark touched his face. Upon doing so he heard the familiar voice of his wife say, `` Mark, I told you taking acid and playing with the Oculus was not a good idea.''
