[ WP ] A dragon struggles to run a coffee shop in a busy city

The halfling rattled off an order involving two dialects of elvish, three dwarven mountain homes and five types of dairy product. Reginnoroth caught a snort just short of his flame-glands. He had heard riddles less complicated than the order, posed to him by people with less calories and better nutritional value than the beverage he was being asked for. He repeated the order back word for word - there was a reason he thought of those riddle-posers in terms of nutritients. 
 
 When most people thought of dragons, they thought of the mighty steeds bonded to valiant warriors, of sages offering wise counsel to kings, or of raiders snatching nubile girls of noble blood to be held in a palatially appointed cave for a dragon's ransom, as it were. What people did n't think about was that for every dragon rich enough to star on the Dragon's Den, there were three draconic equivalents of a working class stiff. Reginnoroth's treasure had been copper, with mold-like mottling caused by silver coins. He could have had a decent living if it had n't been tricked out of it by the blasted halfling too clever to tell his name to a dragon, and right before king Grexidomar's genius idea of making a pact with the human king. 
 
 So, while Grexidomar and the other great dragon lords were wreaking havoc in the stock market, Reginnoroth was almost literally stuck in a coffee shop two blocks away, concocting sugar-and-caffeine laden calorie-bombs for poorly tipping interns. The epics spoke a great deal of the martial impact of dragons, but they tended to gloss over the logistics of feeding a hundred-ton flying reptile between battles. 
 
 `` Oi, what is this? This is an Uristlimul roast when I clearly asked for a Mörulcatten roast!'' The halfling snapped after a cursory sip of his beverage. 
 
 `` No, sir, what you asked for was two parts Mörulcatten percolated Datanedëm ground Koganusân roast, which is what you got'', Reginnoroth explained. 
 
 `` I know my bloody coffee and I know what I bloody well ordered!'' The halfling raged, `` I demand you redo my order!'' And with that, the halfling dumped the five gold piece drink down the drain. 
 
 `` No, sir, I'm afraid I ca n't do that'', Reginnoroth said, `` now, please move along, you are holding up the line.'' 
 
 `` I demand to see the manager!'' the halfling sputtered. 
 
 `` I am the owner of this shop'', Reginnoroth growled back, `` and I really must ask that you either place another order or get out and leave some room for paying customers.'' 
 
 After a few false starts, the halfling retorted: `` Do you know who I am?'' 
 
 What the dragon said was `` No, I do not.'' What his tone and body language said was `` I am a dragon, and as such have a way with name-magic, a notoriously short temper and a digestive tract that can handle a main battle tank. Please reconsider your current course of action.'' 
 
 `` I am Meriawise Whiskytuck! My father owns three chains of coffee shops with individual shops that make more profit in a day than your shop makes in a year!'' 
 
 `` So, Meriawise Whiskytuck'', the Supreme Court had ruled that addressing someone by their full name does not constitute a threat of violence even if you have the ability and a history of aiming lightning bolts just by that, `` let me propose a compromise. If you fancy yourself so much better than a mere coffee shop owner, let us trade riddles. If you manage to ask me a riddle I ca n't answer, I'll give you a year's worth of free coffee. If I manage to ask you a riddle you ca n't answer, you'll buy the same service for all the people that have been waiting to order while you bothered me. You go first.'' 
 
 `` Fine. What's red, takes up too much space and ca n't make a decent cup of coffee?'' The halfling spat. 
 
 `` A dragon'', Reginnoroth answered, `` What is rotund, not as clever as it thinks and raises cholesterol?'' That got a laugh out of some of the people expecting a year's worth of coffee on Mr. Whiskytuck's coin. 
 
 `` What? You're going to stand there and insult me?'' The halfling objected. 
 
 `` Answer the riddle, Meriawise Whiskytuck, or concede the game.'' He might have had less practice than some, but Reginnoroth could still play the mighty dragon's role. 
 
 `` You ca n't seriously be suggesting that I'd buy a year's worth of service to'', the halfling stopped to count, and almost shrieked the result: `` Eleven people?'' 
 
 `` You asked a valid question and I answered. The Supreme Court has found that this counts as accepting the challenge, and upheld it twice this past century.'' 
 
 `` Think hard on your answer, lad'', one of the bystanders, an elven lawyer, interrupted before mister Whiskytuck could protest, `` latter of the two challenges found that refusing to answer thrice counts as a forfeit. Technically, he's already giving you quarter by not taking either of your statements for an answer.'' 
 
 `` This is nonsense! There's no way that'd hold up in a modern court!'' The halfling replied to the elf. Technically, unless he asked someone for help deciphering the riddle, talking to bystanders was permissible although poor form. 
 
 `` I count at least one senior partner from three different law firms that have a year's worth of free coffee riding on this'', someone commented, `` you bet it'll hold up in court.'' 
 
 The halfling was stunned into silence, which sadly did not last. He turned to face his opponent, a look of outrage on his face, pointed an accusing finger at the dragon and yelled `` Entrapment!'' 
 
 A stunned silence descended on the whole shop. `` Yeah, what do you say to that?'' the halfling asked. 
 
 `` I say'', the dragon pitched his voice to be heard over the general muttering, `` that one year hence, I'll send someone to you to discuss a payment plan.'' 
 
 The coffee shop erupted in laughter, and three different lawyers offered the halfling pro bono advice not to pursue the matter in court. 
 
 Reginnoroth turned to the next customer. He may have been compelled to call it fair game the last time someone had managed to trick him, but one did not live as long as he had without learning that these things tended to balance out in the long run.
