[ WP ] `` Why is our grandmother outside with a Trench Gun ? ''

# # `` Why is our grandmother outside with a Trench Gun?'' 
 
 I tried to stop her. Really, I did. She was in front of the television, watching a re-run of *Storage Wars*, when they had a news break. 
 
 As soon as she heard the Congress had abolished Medicare and defunded Social Security, Gran dropped her knitting on the floor, then knocked over the coffee table, on her way to the hall closet. 
 
 She came out of there with Grandpa's old Winchester 97 and two ammo cans full of round shot. 
 
 All I heard her say on her way out was that she'd `` Taught that little cocksucker in second grade. And he ai n't got no bright.''
