[ WP ] You now realize that many companies ' slogans are actually hinted dark secrets within their company . Describe your revelations .

Oh god... It's all so clear now. How could I not have seen it before? The evidence was staring me straight in the face. The companies flaunt the evil practices they do behind closed doors. Their dark secrets open to the public, disguised as slogans and mottos. 
 
 McDonald's `` I'm loving it,'' crap? Yeah they do love it. Love injecting the food with lard and giving people heart attacks. Gives them a thrill when the heart attack statistics go up. 
 
 Nationwide on your side? Your god damn right. They plant chips into your sides to track what you do. 
 
 Like a good neighbor Statefarm is there? That's cause they are always there. Tracking your movements. Stalking you. 
 
 Subway's `` Eat Fresh,'' could n't be bad, could it? Wrong. You wan na know why it's fresh? They keep human prisoners in the basement. That's right. THEY'RE SERVING PEOPLE. Whenever they run out of meat they go into the basement and kill another. 
 
 Do n't `` Trust the Midas touch.'' They're a bunch of molesters. 
 
 And do n't get me started on Oreo's `` Double Stuffed'' Cookies. Those bastards are monsters. 
 
 Keep an eye out the next time you see a slogan. They're catchy, and more true than one might think. Dark secrets open to the public. I could say more, but I think they're catching onto me... Spread the word. They have to be stopped!
