[ WP ] As the newly-elected President of the United States , you are given your first security briefing . In it , you are informed that the American Flag is a sentient being that demands to be worshipped in song by schoolchildren , and is hungry for more .

``... You ca n't be serious.'' 
 
 The assembled team looked at the new president severely. He kept on waiting for one of them to smile, to laugh, to show him any indication that this was n't some kind of bad joke. Nobody stirred. 
 
 `` You expect me to believe that the American Flag is a sentient being? A goddamn God?'' 
 
 The head of the FBI shrugged weakly. `` Essentially, yes.'' 
 
 `` And the morning pledge and all that - that's just been a form of *worship? *'' 
 
 `` Oh, absolutely. Why else would we do it? It's ridiculous.'' He shook his head, momentarily annoyed. 
 
 `` And you see, well, it's always wanting more. More followers, more believers, more people who proudly call themselves Americans. Else it gets a bit antsy. Very antsy, in fact.'' 
 
 The president did n't react. 
 
 `` *9/11 antsy. *'' 
 
 Still, the president just stared. Thinking was n't his strong point. 
 
 `` I'm still not following you.'' 
 
 The head of the FBI winced. 
 
 `` Well, you see, sir, it's about that *wall* of yours...''
