[ WP ] You are secretly a super hero working a desk job . You are terrible at suppressing your powers in the office .

I never liked my desk job. I do n't even need the money I get from it. 
 But I have super powers, and I need to be normal. I need to look normal. 
 
 It does n't help that I have severe social anxiety and suffer from extreme awkwardness. Perhaps it's a fair trade, considering I can read minds, manipulate energy and matter with my mind, and also I'm immortal. No big deal right? 
 `` Your turn to get coffee today Sam.'' Samantha groggily commands as she walks past me to her cubicle. I was feeling particularly feisty today, and try to get a look at that ass. Samantha is pretty hot, and I've always sorta had a crush on her since I started working here. If I did n't have to hide my superpowers I doubt it'd be any effort to get her to fall for me. Bitches love superpowers. 
 
 But yeah, like I was saying, I try get a look at dat ass. And as I'm obviously looking at her ass, she turns around half way through saying `` Make mine a skinny'' and catches me red hand- red eyed? 
 `` Umm sorry I was just looking at the floor in front of you and you walked where I was looking.'' I stutter, reminiscent of a cringey greentext tale from 4chan. 
 `` Well, if you decided you wanted to look at my ass, I'd be fine with that.'' She says, before smiling at me and entering her cubicle. 
 
 Holy FUCK! 
 The excitement is TOO MUCH! 
 Paper and sheets fly into the air as I involuntarily release a huge wave of energy, destroying all electronics and blowing all the lights. 
 
 The office is dark now, besides the early morning light coming through the frost covered windows on this shallow winter day. The muffled sound of a car alarm can be heard from somewhere on the street outside. 
 What surprises me most is that nobody has said anything. I stand up from my cubicle expecting to see or hear my fellow workers wondering what the fuck happened. The isles between the cubicles are empty. Hesitantly, I enter Samantha's cubicle, to find an inside out corpse, ribcage and intestines mangled together, ugly eyeballs torn from their sockets. 
 
 Shocked, I check the other cubicles. Everyone is dead. 
 Thank god, I do n't have to talk to Samantha again. That would be too much for me. I jump out the window, which is about 3 stories up and slow my fall before hitting the ground. 
 Fuck this shit. I have superpowers. I do what I want. 
 And so I fly - the world at my fingertips.
