[ WP ] An MMORPG boss is lonely after a new expansion pack is released and no one comes to fight him anymore .

Mr Tuttle had spent many nights at home reviewing the mountains of financial documents, and though his client was very persistent to find a pleasurable result from the data, there was only bad news to be delivered. He found himself in the middle of a very large, abandoned warehouse, sitting across a flimsy table from a large, crimson-skinned humanoid, who seemed to be nervously picking away at the plywood, loosely bolted to the table's metal frame. 
 
 `` I'm very sorry Mr. Balthazore -- am I pronouncing that correctly?'' 
 
 `` Bal-tha-**zar**, but that's quite alright, you were saying?'' 
 
 `` My mistake. Well, I've been perusing your files for as long as my espresso machine would help me stay awake, and -- did you have any trouble finding the place, by the way? This area does n't seem to be recognized by my GPS, luckily I had a local road map.'' Tuttled interrupted himself, shifting in his chair as he glanced around the ominously quiet hall. 
 
 `` Yes, yes, New Jersey is about halfway for both of us, my commute was just fine. Now if we could get back to the pertinent details?'' 
 
 Despite his gargantuan stature, the tail large enough to be rested upon in lieu of a chair, and having fiery piecing eyes, intense enough to make your throat parched if you crossed glances, he seemed as docile as a kitten, sitting withdrawn with his head sunken into his chest. Compared to their first meeting a short week ago, this demeanor put Tuttle far more at ease, though he still trembled a bit at the thought of delivering unwelcome news. He recalled how Ms. Yeung attacked him with her purse when he informed her that her beach house was being foreclosed on, only his ego was bruised that day, but Ms. Yeung did n't have forearms the size of his thigh or horns. *God, those horns are terrifying. * 
 
 `` Well, Mr Balthazar, there's no denying the sharp decline in your revenue stream. With the adventurers opting to explore the newly discovered continents, there's been less than 10 of them in the past month, and rookies at that. You've been using your own gold to refill the lure chests, and that's eaten up a large percentage of your reserves.'' 
 
 `` Every realm lord does that! ``, Balthazar objected, leaping to a standing position, `` You're telling me I ca n't afford to lure adventurers anymore?! Am I just supposed to wait in my chambers until someone decides to fight me?'' 
 
 `` From my research, most travellers do n't venture beyond the first chest unfortunately. Some realm lords have taken to hoarding legendary weapons to entice the rogues, though they'd likely be out of your price range, and without an influx of dead adventurers, your chance of stumbling upon some of them are slim to none.'' Tuttle averted his gaze and removed a bottle of water from his briefcase and took a long drink. He stared back across the table to his speechless client, and decided to take another uncomfortably long sip. `` There's always options,'' he quietly continued, still electing to keep his gaze aside, `` if the adventurers wo n't come to you --'' 
 
 `` I **knew** you were going to say that,'' Balthazar shouted, slamming his fist through the table, shooting splinters in every direction, `` there's ***no way*** I can be one of those rovers. I've presided over that cave for decades! Can you imagine the shame I'd endure, the mockery that'd befall on me if any of the other lords heard I was roaming about the forests like a god-damned elk?'' 
 
 `` At your current rate of expenditure, I estimate you'll be able to carry on for another 6 months. After that, you'll be broke and forced into that position. As your accountant, I'd advise you to make plans within a month or so.'' He quickly packed his belongings and made his way toward the door, leaving the nine foot behemoth still staring stunned at unoccupied seat across from him, `` I'm very sorry. Perhaps I'll be hearing from you in a few months time.'' 
 
 Balthazar heard the heavy steel door close off in the distance, as he contemplated how many lottery tickets 50 pounds of gold would buy him.
