[ WP ] You find a genie in a bottle . The only requirement is that your wish has to be vague . The genie ends up up completely misinterpreting your wish .

So there I was, walking along one day, in a field. And I found a bottle on the floor. It was an old looking brown-glass thing and it stank of oil. Not a very nice bottle. But on closer inspection it bore the name of a well known beer brand and I thought with a bit of cleaning it may well be worth something one day. So I picked it up and rubbed it with my sleeve to get rid of the dried cow crap that was coating one side of it. 
 
 Well you'll never believe what happened next. POOF. A big cloud of blue smoke, awful stink of hydrocarbon. Could n't see a thing, coughing like crazy. When the smoke cleared there was this kind of drab fat guy sort of hovering in the air in front of me, also coughing like crazy. `` Woah neat trick'', I said, genuinely impressed. `` Hey, I'm a genie and my name is Dirk'', said the genie when he had caught his breath. `` I'm a budget genie which is why I'm in this fucking horrible stinking bottle. You can make a wish but it has to be kind of broad, because I'm not very exact, and you know, if you wish for something exact I'd look like an incompetent fuckwit if I got it wrong.'' 
 
 `` OK then, Mr Genie, let's not mess about here.'' I fully decided to take advantage of my situation. `` I wish to be powerful. I have always wanted to have great power.'' The genie furrowed his brow and looked off to the side for a moment, twirling his little moustache. `` Yeah that's kinda vague enough. Let me see what I can do.'' He then folded his arms across his chest, and sort of vibrated, with great sparks and more acrid blue smoke coming out of his ears and stuff. When he stopped he was sweating and wheezing. 
 
 `` There I did it. Hope it works out good for ya.'' With that he disappeared. I looked around. Nothing had changed. Still in this field with all the cows. Did n't feel very powerful. I took a step. To my great surprise an almighty chasm ripped open beneath my foot. The whole planet shuddered around me, causing great tidal waves, volcanic eruptions and earthquakes across the globe. The sun changed position in the sky. 
 
 I realised that the genie had not given me great power, but instead massive planet-moving torque. I did a few hops, skips and jumps, spinning the world beneath my feet like a circus performer spinning some kind of giant inflatable, killing most of the living things on the planet in the process and rendering it uninhabitable. Then I kind of regretted it, and just sort of got killed in all of the resulting mayhem.
