[ WP ] Begin with an unusual birth of a baby .

'You're doing great Betsy!' 
 
 That's our OBGYN, who is amazing. My wife looks like she's about to explode. This room smells horrible. I touch her on her wrist. 
 
'Here we go Babe, I'm here for you one-hundred percent. I'm not going anywhere.' 
 
 A smile flashes on her face for half a second before she's pulled back under by her body. Her hand claws back up at mine. I'm looking at the heart of fucking darkness right now. The passion to create and to destroy are the same, so it makes sense to me that the fury that creates life is the same that wrests it away. 
 
'It's crowning!' our doctor shouts. How is she so happy and collected? Shrooms, salvia, you name it, does n't have shit on the experience of watching a baby be born. 
 
 Wow. Her head slithers out of my wife's vagina and it's the most transcendent, beautiful, collapsing experience I've ever had. 
 Beautiful blood. Heartwarming mucus. Kind spit. 
 Now a chest, arms, and little legs. The last physical tether from mother to child in this life as we know it dangles on after my baby. I glance up at my wife, she's exhausted. Well done nature. 
 
'Do I get to cut it?' I ask. 
 
'Sure, we just need to do a few key things first.' 
 Our OBGYN's tone has changed from chipper to directed, and it's honestly a bit disconcerting. 
 
'Key things? Like what?' 
 
'Well you know Duncan, we're in the 21st Century. Babies are n't brought into the world now as they once were. They need to be brought up to speed, educated!' 
 
'Sure, but she was JUST born. Do n't you think there's time for that down the road?' 
 
 Now I'm feeling very uneasy. I look at my wife for strength but she's passed out. 
 
'Look, I've been practicing for fifteen years now, I know what I'm doing! I assure you your beautiful little daughter will not be happy, healthy, or normally integrated into society unless we take these steps. You do n't want to disadvantage her, do you Duncan?' 
 
'Of course not but frankly I'm really confused and starting to get a little pissed at how obtuse you're being.' 
 
'You're right. Here, let me explain. She needs patching, updating. We've passed the silicon age and the information age, we're in the thick of the integration age. And your daughter needs her applications, technologies, and bug fixes while she's fresh and malleable.' 
 
 Okay, now I know something is wrong here. 
 
'What? That's insane. Human beings do n't need to be inundated in technology to live a fulfilled life, in fact the very thing that prevents us from being satisfied is our excessive reliance and addiction to being entertained by frivolous tech!' 
 
 The OBGYN frowned. 
 
'I really hoped you were going to be a team player on this one Duncan. That's too bad.' 
 
 I hear boot steps coming down the hall. 
 
'Look, human beings are already fully endowed with what they need and apart from medical emergencies do not need this intervention! Now please, cut the umbilical cord and give me whatever papers I need to sign so we can get this over with.' 
 
'We will, we will. We just have to integrate her first. If you'll kindly step out of the room so the process can begin, she'll be yours in just a few hours.' 
 
'I'm not going anywhere. You're not doing this. Cut the fucking umbilical cord.' 
 
 Two bodies have stopped outside of the door into the operating room. 
 
'I'm sorry Duncan, but we know what's best for your kid. Like I said -' 
 
'You clearly do n't know what's best if your recommendation is turning her into some kind of cyborg frankenstein before she's even taken her first steps! I -' 
 
'SECURITY!' 
 
 The doors burst open and two men in black walk in and immediately restrain me. 
 
'This is fucked up! Fascism! What the hell! -' 
 
'You should've just cooperated Duncan.' 
 
 I knock a guard off and push the other one, then I'm tasered. I crumple to the floor. 
 
'Dammit! I wo n't let you do this!' 
 
 Crack. My head is knocked from a blow with a nightstick. I begin to fade, lying on cold hospital linoleum. I hear three words as I'm dragged out of the OR, falling asleep. 
 
'It's already begun.' 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

