[ WP ] Sir , we have made contact with an advanced alien species . Unfortunately sir , they 're assholes

`` Lord Trump, tremendous news from the Trump Nebula 100AT. We've discovered intelligent, sentient life, but-'' 
 *rudely interrupted by Lord Trump* 
 `` Intelligent life you say? Go on.'' 
 `` Yes, Lord Trump. But the problem is they're assholes.'' 
 *Lord Trumps tiny hands are frightened* 
 `` We must attack, ready the Nuclear Trump.'' 
 *Neil Jameson, Trumps NASA advisor screams* 
 `` No! They're not assholes, but legitimate assholes of all different colors! Some hairy, some bald, all with feelings of their own. They've created their own world!'' 
 *Donald Trump stares off into the distance* 
 `` Feelings off their own? I had feelings once. Tremendous feelings. Believe me. I had the best.'' 
 *Trump takes finger off nuclear launch button for Nuclear Trump* 
 `` If even the biggest of assholes can be great, maybe I can too'' 
 *sigh of relief falls over White Trump House briefing room* 
 *Donald looks at launch button engraved with his family crest* 
 `` But, I've always wanted to blow up a planet. We'll name it Alderaaan.'' 
 *Alderaaan ( copyright ) explodes as trump walks out of the Trump briefing room* 
 
 *next 40 days* 
 The nuclear explosion on the ass planet of Alderaaan resulted in the spread of assholes around the solar system and yes, it resulted in the *Great Ass Flood* that lasted 40 days. President Trump was not available for comments on extinction of his race. 

