[ WP ] Write the most elaborate , over-dramatic , and exciting story you can think of that all just turns out to be a set-up for a pun so horrible I 'll want to punch you

`` God I hate this shit Christian'' 
 
 `` What?'' 
 
 `` We eat the same shit everyday, we're at the bottom of the food chain, we hide from everyone and everything out there man I ca n't take it anymore!'' His rage was a white dwarf inside of his mind. A massively dense, intensely hot ball of anger and frustration. He had had enough. 
 
 `` Perhaps you should take a walk Bob, my prawn friend, clear your head. You're going to end up killing the mood when we take those lovely ladies out this evening. Go on. Get your head right'' 
 
 `` Ah fuck. Maybe you're right mate. I'll be back in about an hour. Give you a call then.'' 
 
 `` Do n't be late Bob, or I'll have myself a little shrimp cocktail!'' 
 
 Bob trudged out of the Lonely Coral and swam out across the seafloor. The dull blue day blurred the details of his surroundings to a haze. Head hung, he travelled on for about a mile or so, before sitting down against an enormous brass lamp. 
 
 `` What the hell am I doing here anyway?'' he pondered as he slide his back down the lamp to a slump. 
 
 Suddenly there was a rumbling so loud and powerful that rubble trundled down the sea wall from above, and the tentacles of anemones darted about as if being tugged on sharply by a puppeteers strings. 
 
 `` Holy Crab!'' he exclaimed as he dived for cover underneath the coral overhang. Thick green smoke cascaded from the spout of the lamp onto the sea floor and engulfed bob and his surroundings completely. As the smog cleared, a huge green figure took form. 
 
 `` Alas! You have freed me from my prison! Young crustacean, I feel it is my duty to grant you 2 wishes. 3 is far too mainstream.'' The fish genie announced. 
 
 `` Wow! This could n't have come at a better time! Mr. Genie sir, I know what I want for my first wish.'' 
 
 `` Choose wisely.'' 
 
 `` I ca n't live like this anymore. I need to be at the top of the food chain. I need to be powerful and fearless. That's the life for me, I will be happy then.'' 
 
 `` Very well, prawn. But what exactly is it that you want?'' 
 
 Bob took a deep breath, exhaled and said `` I want to be a shark.'' 
 
 The seafloor shook violently again and Bob was spun up into a whirlpool. The silt and sand drawn into the torrent made it impossible to sea. Everything went dark. 
 Suddenly Bob awoke. He felt power in his tail like never before. His field of view was substantially bigger. Like a console peasant that had switched to PC, bob opened his bulging eyes and gulped down this beautiful new world as he saw it. He felt his rough skin, his razor sharp teeth, his streamlined body. He was a shark. He had begun a new life. 
 
 After about 40 miles the elation had died down. For the first time ever, Bob was alone. He was a big fish in a huge pond, full of smaller fish, and no one wanted to talk to him. Everywhere he swam, other fish fled and hid from him. He was n't enjoying this new life as much as he had though he would. 
 In an act of desperation at his new realization, Bob swam back to the lamp, to retrieve his second wish from the genie. 
 
 `` Ah, you have returned! To what do I owe the pleasure?'' 
 
 `` I want my second wish. I need to make things right'' rattled Bob. 
 
 `` Very well. What is your final wish?'' 
 
 `` Turn me back, magical genie. I must return to what I was before: a humble prawn. That is the life for me'' 
 
 Once more, Bob was sucked into the watery vortex, thrust into complete darkness, and cast into another form. 
 He awoke on the seabed. The lamp was gone. The genie was nowhere to be seen. All was quiet. 
 The sun pierced through the heavens as Bob made his way back to his old friend. He approached the diner from earlier, to find Christian outside with the two lady prawns, waiting anxiously. With a sense of pride and a new love for the world, Bob yelled out: 
 
 `` Hey! Hey it's me! I'm a prawn again Christian!'' 
 
 

