[ WP ] When the USA finally invaded Canada , it seemed no contest . The Canadians were unprepared , out-manned , and out-gunned . But nobody was prepared for Canada 's secret secret weapon - banned by ancient accords and long forgotten - the geese !

`` O Canada'' the immortal anthem that will ring from this day forward. The one true anthem of North America was almost quashed as the Americans in the south marched across our borders. They had the weapons, the numbers, and the will to defeat the great northern land. 
 
 Shortly after Donald Trump became president he set his sights on our wonderful maple leafs and majestic moose population. His thirst for the ultimate pancake was unquenchable, and his hatred of poutine was undeniable. The Orange Menace as he became known was formidable, and he commanded his troops with such rigor. 
 
 For two long years we fought the advancing Americans with everything we had. We rode our moose valiantly, but our efforts were in vain. We lined the streets with booby traps of the stickiest maple syrup, but they sent in their special forces comprised of the most morbidly obese men and women the world had ever seen. They ate through the sticky traps and engaged in war tactics now amiably called `` consumed earth policy.'' The threat of total annihilation was so real that we had to call in our final solution... the geese. 
 
 Now I know what you are thinking, `` that is a war crime of the highest caliber.'' Geese warfare had been outlawed by the 1972 Geneva Convention and for good reason, Geese were merciless. They consumed everything in their path. Their beaks are razor sharp, and not even a tank can stop their powerful claws. But, desperate times calls for desperate measures and if the Americans can use morbidly obese mutants, we could surely use our geese. 
 
 The sky turned white as millions of geese flooded the airways. The obese special forces looked in horror as the thousands of pounds of flesh was ripped from their `` big bones.'' The Americans dropped nukes on us, but the geese only absorbed their power. The geese grew to be the size of a Winnebago and their hunger could not be quelled. In the end, only ten million Americans and three million Canadians survived. Trump was killed in the Goosepocalypse and Justin Trudeau was mistaken for poutine by the obese special forces. 
 
 Both America and Canada were devastated and Mexico became the primary power of North America. They consoled both nations with the most delicious enchiladas ever crafted. The North American Union was established to ensure that neither nation ever engaged in such total war tactics ever again. 
 
 It has been twenty years and the dark times are behind us. Both nations have rebounded, but it'll never be the same. The world will never be the same.
