[ WP ] A genie offers a refund for a wish gone wrong

`` So, brat, what'd you end up writing it for?'' 
 
 I glance up from my desk. *Now* he has time for me? He looks bored. But then again, he *is* a genie. They all probably remain in a constant state of boredom from centuries of sitting in their chosen containers. Oh, wait. How long has it been? I should respond. I wonder... Shrug. 
 
 `` You.'' 
 
 Ahh... Stillness. Like a statue! Or a mosquito larvae-infested pond. Did you know mosquitoes can lay up to -- 
 
 `` WHAT??'' he splutters as he processes that oh so deceptively innocent word. What a lovely word, do n't you agree? It'd go very well with that turkey panini in -- 
 
 `` NONONONONO. No. No. You ca n't just --'' He breaks off. 
 
 *Rude*. He needs to really stop interrupting -- 
 
 `` Fame! Riches! Glory! It can be all *yours*.'' He needs only a look at my unimpressed face. `` A -- a yacht? A lover? A wealthy, handsome, *fit* lover, yes? With magnificent hair like that Febreeze man hunk! No wait. Fabulous? Fab -- Fab -- FABIO! And --'' 
 
 *Oooh... * How *dee-LISH-usss*. 
 
 I can almost taste the desperation. 
 
 Speaking of which, I'm getting hungry. And I have work to do. So... 
 
 I cut off his rambles. `` You know what? You're brilliant! And right. You are absolutely right.'' Aww... Is that a hope I see? `` I *can* have all that!'' I pause. And my lips quirk up. `` And I will. Once that *blank* check you gave me is cashed in at The Bank... which should be in just another business day, according to the goblin. See you around!'' Here, have a goofy grin. Well, I *think* it's goofy. Ca n't tell without a mirror. This should help. I wiggle my fingers near my face for good measure. 
 
 As I flounce out the door towards my beckoning panini, I hear a whimpered `` Oh Mercy. The Boss is going to *kill* me''. 
 
 Heh. You'd think The Genies would have a workshop or regulations against giving their clients blank wish checks. Speaking of blank checks, did you know Germany --
