[ WP ] War breaks out between the legions of hell and heaven , humanity joins and surprisingly is winning against both

Neither angels nor demons were truly prepared. We were, and we did n't even know it. Heaven and hell have n't kept tabs on earth for years. While they fought over our souls, we were busy evolving. 
 
 The angels where the first to strike. They swooped in from the sky in their flaming chariots. Their swords were aglow with the first rays of sunlight. Air defense took them out before the sun was fully out. Dumb fuckers actually tried to attack D.C. 
 
 Next, of course, came the demons. Marching by the millions, they tried to take the south. What they did n't expect was the Cartels. They felt the demons were moving in on their turf, so they fought back. That was some of the most brutal guerilla warfare anyone had ever seen. 
 
 By the end of the week, heaven and hell were on their last legs. The had n't counted on our artillery. On our aircraft. Out navies. Our sheer capacity for warfare. 
 
 By the end of the third week, heaven and hell were pleading for mercy. By the end of the fourth, they were begging. 
 
 They ended the war humiliated, their armies decimated, and their resources now at the mercy of a very greedy 7 billion people.
