[ WP ] Philosophical Horror

`` I do n't understand you Charles. You have this woman practically begging for you to take her back to your flat,'' Austin took a drag from his cigarette, `` and you do n't capitalize.'' He released the puff of smoke out with a quick breath. `` I mean honestly, why do we go out if you're just gunna fuck it up?'' He motioned at the nearby waitress in a violent flick of the wrist, `` Christ we are the only ones here and no service.'' 
 
 The waitress approached, her name tag read Linda, carrying a small pad with small sweat stains on the edge from her fingers clutching it. `` Good morning! What will it be then?'' She said in an ostensibly cheerful tone even though the bags under her eyes were telling them to fuck off. 
 
 `` Right then, I'll have the number 2, burn the bacon black.'' Austin said without eye contact and jerked the folded menu and waited for the woman to release him of the burden of holding it. 
 
 `` The same.'' Charles said in such a soft response that surprised Linda, the career waitress. 
 
 `` Well? Are you gunna tell me what happened?'' Austin threw his hands in the air without his elbows leaving the table, as if they were glued to the surface. 
 
 `` Tell you what?'' Charles responded, looking out the window to the empty parking lot, knowing this would anger Austin. 
 
 `` You know fucking what. Why the fuck did n't you take her home?'' Austin's arms flopped onto the table, making the clutter of salt shakers and ketchup bottles clink. 
 
 `` I am not so sure myself.'' Charles said still staring out the window. `` Do you ever...'' He started, but knew that asking Austin might be a mistake. 
 
 `` Do I ever what?'' Austin said halfheartedly while using his straw as a toothpick. 
 
 `` Do you ever think about The One?'' Charles quietly asked bracing himself for whatever carp Austin would throw his way. 
 
 `` Like a soul mate?'' Austin asked, clearly caught off guard by the weight of the question. 
 
 `` Yeah like a soul mate. Someone that you are destined to be together with. Someone that makes the earth quake beneath your feet. The air becomes thicker and harder to breath. The lights in the room seem to follow them.'' Charles realized how ridiculous he was being, `` You know all that sappy shit.'' 
 
 `` No, Charles,'' He said in a mocking tone, `` I do not believe in a soul mate.'' Austin reclined in the booth seat and put his arms across the back, `` That shit is all made up. Its all chemistry. Whether you find someone who can withstand smelling your pheromones all day long without gagging.'' He then leaned forward on the table pointing directly at Charles, `` And there ai n't only one person for someone. That load of bull the romantics spew to give their life purpose. It's shit and you know it.'' 
 
 `` Why would I ask if I knew it already Austin?'' Charles quipped, knowing that this would, again, make him irritated. 
 
 `` Charles, do you honestly believe that there is only one person out there for everyone? Then, how the fuck are all these people getting married? Their one true loves, they just happen to work at the same fucking company as they do? They just happen to live in the same city? Same country? Same fucking continent? Its a load of bull and you know it. People pretend that they have these unique standards that only one person can fill. Bull. Why is it that a person moving to an entirely new part of the world can make friends? It is n't because they lucked out and found the only 5 people that check off their list. It is because people crave shit like that. They will make friends with people they would have never been friends with before then simply because they need friends not because it was destined. The same goes for this soul mate shit. People can just delude themselves that this person is entirely unique and no one could replace them but they are dead wrong. That other bloke across the bar could fill the same needs too only he grew up slightly different, so at Christmas they leave out doughnuts for ol' saint Nick not cookies.'' Austin exclaimed with a whirlwind of hand gestures. 
 
 `` So you are saying that people all are the same at the core. Their background just fills in the minor details that determines whether you are attracted to them or not?'' 
 
 `` Were you fucking listening? I am saying that finding someone that you could spend the rest of your life with is n't hard. Their upbringing, their shit of a childhood is just filler. People crave other people. Were are social and political animals.'' He took another drag of his cigarette. 
 
 `` What about those people who spend every second of every day together. Those people who have been together since they were five years old?'' Charles asked actually intrigued by Austin's thoughts on this. 
 
 `` Fucking hell man, they simply got lucky. They were just similar enough that their pheromones resonated more with each other.'' Austin scoffed as if it was obvious. 
 
 `` So you would n't call them soul mates, you would just say they got lucky in the person they chose to give their life to?'' 
 
 `` Exactly. Marriages, civil unions whatever the fuck these kids are up to now a days is just how you formally say that you are willing to give your life to someone because you find them a functioning human being with some sort of value.'' 
 
 `` What about those who do n't have any value?'' Charles was purposefully playing devils advocate here. Testing Austin to see if he could corner himself in his own ideas. 
 
 `` Those are the spinsters man. No one found them suitable to give their life to them. They did n't show they were successful enough or responsible enough or some shit. Why the fuck do you care so much about this anyway?'' Austin lowered an eyebrow and finished his cigarette. 
 
 `` I do n't know. After last night, I have been wondering if we are destined to be with someone. To share our life with someone else in the universe or if we are simply alone. A bunch of star dusts formed into sacks of meat. Getting each other off by rubbing together and shooting DNA at each other to create equally fucked up meat sacks. Then withering away back into dust. Waiting to take shape again.'' Charles stared off into seemingly another world. 
 
 `` What the fuck, man. What happened last night?'' 
 

