[ WP ] Leonardo DiCaprio in a fit of rage begins to torpedo his own career by deliberately acting poorly and taking on bad films . He finally wins an oscar for starring in Paul Blart : Mall Cop 3 .

`` 20 OSCARS IN ONE NIGHT!'' Ladies and gentlemen for the 20th Time Tonight, it's LEONARDO DICAPRIO!! For paul blart: Mall Cop 3!!! A RECORD IN OSCAR HISTORY!!!! says Kevin Spacey Loud and honorable to be saying this record setting event. The Crowd Cheered fanatically, with every single inch of their useless souls compared to leo clapping and crying. The idiots just kept cheering, while a human god was among us, was walking up to the stage, like jesus, al pacino x1000, Tears where in eyes, nothing like this movie in history, has saved more lives, made more tears, and more money. A RECORD Setting $ 10 Billion Dollars!, shit, i've even seen it 50 times, in 10 days though.; \ 
 
 Kevin Spacey, now with tears, says, lets take a look at one of my favorite Parts of the movie, as Leo Walks up here. Kevin points to the screen: 
 
 `` Blart, You FAT SACK OF SHIT!'' we are going to get out of this mall, if i have to scratch and claw, and bleed, and cry, and die blart, you fat filthy gerbil, MY HEART WILL GO ON!!!'' 
 
::The Crowd Cheers, tears, Smiles, Faints, and some even pee them self stupid, it's truly madness:: 
 
 `` Gabriello ( Leos Name in the movie ), You have the heart of a lion, but how will we ever get out this Aunt Annies Pretzel shop, where they make the best sour cream and chives pretzel this way around Mexico, Blart Looks at the screen to make sure the audience got this unsubtle hint to advertising.'' 
 
 `` YOUUUU FAT TERD OF LARD, YOU DON'' T GET TO HAVE A HEART OF LION BY BEING SO PATHETIC''. Gabriello, was now crying, and full of blood from clawing his way out the pretzel dumbster. YOU DON'' T THINK I WILL SURVIVE BLART!?! YOU DON'' T THINK MY HEART WILL GO ON!!!?!?! I WILL BE FREE!!! I WILL LEAVE THIS,::And the whole crowd said this line at the same time Gabriello said it. `` GOD!!!! FORSAKEN!!!! MALL!!!!!!!'' As they all pointed at the screen with each word. Everybodies pants where no longer dry. 
 
 Leo Makes it to the stage, every peon sits and does n't say a word. 
 
 He speaks, we all faint, A God, A Legend, A Fucking Hero. 
 
 We watch the cameras the next day, to see what he said, he mostly just did monkey things, like throw shit at people, slap them in the face as they 100,000 person audience laid there fainted with pee pee in their pants. He then looks at the camera, and says the most epic thing I've ever heard. Leonardo is DiCaprio!!!!!!!! He drops a fake mic, `` I'm Out''!
