[ WP ] You just had a very close near death experience . You are shaken up—not because of what happened , but what you saw before you were brought back .

I watched a small army of people rush around the little room. They were surprisingly nimble, given the lack of space. I listened to orders being barked, and felt pokes and prods. A nurse, I believe one of the nurses who had been present for my initial operation, held my hand and called for a blanket ( strange. I was n't cold ). I was aware of a strange fluttering in my chest, and a tremble in my stomach, but it did n't phase me. Still does n't, but maybe that's because I'm not sure I was ever actually there. 
 
 Now I knew something had gone terribly wrong, I'm not an idiot. You do n't get swarmed by people in a hospital for no damn reason. So no, it's not that I did n't know, it's that I did n't care. Apathy is a strange thing. I knew I should have been scared, but I was n't. I knew I should have asked what the hell was happening, but I did n't. I knew I should have cared. But I could n't. 
 
 To be honest I just found the whole thing to be incredibly inconvenient. 
 
 Logically I knew what was happening. I mean, I did n't know the exact details, but a crash team member calling for an IED is a bit of a spoiler. I crashed. I crashed so hard that I did n't even bounce when I hit the bottom. I watched this team of strangers scramble to save me. I felt the nurse hold my hand and heard her tell me it was going to be OK. You'd think being thrown into such a frantic state of helpless destitution would be a shock so great that it would render the world around you completely incomprehensible. 
 
 I guess not.
