[ WP ] Boris Johnson was being given a tour of the new nuclear facilities on the outskirts of London , but falls into radioactive waste . He emerges with strange and spectacular powers .

It's not quite in-keeping with the prompt, but I felt you might enjoy my literary genius. 
 
 The Great Borisman part 1 
 Jan 11, 2011 
 
 
 `` Evham Bailes says ( 01:21 ) 
 write me a boris johnson fanfic'' 
 
 Boris was riding his bike home after a long day at the London Assembly. He was very tired, but still he peddled on down the busy rush hour clogged roads of London, passing many a big red bus and shouting Torrie haters as he went. 
 
 After stopping several times to sign babies heads and women's breasts, he finally made it home. Pulling his helmet off to reveal his flattened locks of super Saiyan gold, he pushed the bike into his £4,485,945 house. 
 
 Leaning the bike against the hallway wall, he sighed heavily. Despite his hours at the LA, he was not done for the day. Oh no, for you see, Boris had a second job. One far more important than regulating congestion and renting bikes; for you see, Boris' second career was a very especial one indeed. For he was the great Borisman. Politician by day, super hero by night! 
 
 He walked to his kitchen for a quick refreshment before he exited the kitchen to the garden and walked to the shed at the end of the garden. Unlocking the padlock with his super secret code, he entered the shed. Ringing and old bike bell on the work surface at the back revealed a long, winding stair case leading underground. This is where the Great Borisman's HQ resided. The Boris Shed! 
 
 In the Boris Shed there was everything he could need to fight the evil riff-raff on London's streets. An array of bikes; city, mountain, hybrid as well at his Wiff-Waff Paddles of Supreme Justice! The far wall was take over by a large screen, hundreds of CCTV images being directed straight to his super computer so he could keep an eye on the goings on in London and keep its citizens safe. 
 
 Just as he was surveying the monitor it flashed red and a siren began to blare out. The screen was taken over by a single CCTV stream, some oik was trying to steal one his Bois bikes! The little hooligan! Without hesitation, Boris turned around and ran to a cabinet, staring up at his battle suit. 
 It was a full body spandex suit with his gadget bum bag and battle tie. He quickly yanked the spandex over his head, struggled to buckle the bum bag around his waist before finally tying his tie in a Windsor knot. He ran to his Super Speedy Borisman Bicycle - the one with the giant thruster engines and a red body job with neon green flames decorating the frame. A secret entrance opened - 
 
 Just before he exited, he grabbed his Borisman helmet- safety first! It matched the bike's décor, with a visor that covered his face. He peddled his way out of the Boris shed and headed to the location of the oik. 
 
 TO BE CONTINUED! 
 
 In the second instalment of The Adventures Of The Great Borisman, Borisman confronts the bike snatching oik and meets his arch rival – The evil super villain: Lord EtonBoy!
