[ WP ] Your Own Brilliant Detective - Find the murderer


 `` What've we got?'' Blutarsky asked, adjusting his hat to protect his face from the heavy rain. A tarp was hanging over the crime scene- And a body was covered in a white sheet. The coroner wrung her hands and sighed. 
 
 `` One victim, male, mid 50's..'' She removed the sheet. Everyone in the scene gasped- A thick coating of orange and gold food flavoring powder covered a man in an horizontal-striped black and white outfit- A small bandit mask over his eyes and a wide-rim hat- Blutarsky covered his mouth with his hand in shock. The victim had a wide, goofy grin on his face and a bag of stolen hamburgers in his hands. 
 
 `` Is that who I think it is?'' 
 
 `` It is. Cause of death seems to be flavor-blasting, about an hour ago. We got a call in from the janitor who found the body. Witness is over by the vehicle bay-'' She pointed off into the distance. Blutarsky took a deep breath. 
 
 `` Looks like my luck's took a turn for the shitter.'' He wandered off back into the rain. The witness was a man in his 40's, balding early with a thick mustache on his upper lip. He stared off into the distance at the flavor-powdered region of the alleyway and shook his head. 
 
 `` You saw who did this?'' 
 
 `` Naw, I just found the body. I heard a loud giggling fit and the sound of a bag of sand or something being cut open and then found the body like this. Hell of a way to go, being flavor-blasted.'' The witness shrugged. 
 
 `` Thank you for your time.'' 
 
 
 An hour passes. Blutarsky leaned back into his office chair and looked over the evidence. `` Who would want an unrepentant food burglar dead?'' He held up a photograph of the crime scene. ``..Cheese-flavored powder.. But why-'' Movement at the door. A wrapped object was thrown through the mail slot- And rapid footsteps- 
 
 Have to move quickly- Blutarsky jolted across the office and opened the door- and there was no one there. Closing the door, he turned, right into the face of a regal-dressed man wearing a full-head plastic mask of a king. `` FFFUCK! DO N'T FUCKING SNEAK UP ON ME LIKE THAT!'' 
 
 The figure remained silent, just staring ahead with a hard plastic smile on his face. He reached to a satchel at his side, revealing a delicious Bacon-Stuffed Cheeseburger Now Available at participating Burger King outlets. 
 
 `` NO! Get out! GET OUT!'' He shoved the king out of his office, slamming the door with a huff. `` Goddamn it- Liked to give me a fucking heart attack.'' The old detective held a hand to his chest- And then took note of the tape. 
 
 It was slid into a VCR- 
 
 And security footage of the murder began to roll. A tiny, impish figure in red bounced up and down, following the Hamburgular. A brief struggle- And the smaller figure kills the thief with a bag of industrial-grade flavoring. With a loud, cartoonish cackle, the imp handspringed away. 
 
 ``..My god. It's the Noid!'' 
 
 
 The Noid was arrested and sentenced to death for his crimes. 

