[ WP ] The mods of WritingPrompts pull a bank heist to fund future writing contests

`` Shit. Shit. Shit.'' Yelled /u/Lexilogical, slamming her foot against the gas pedal as the car door slammed behind /u/luna_lovewell and /u/TrueKnot, a crimson hole oozing from the front of TrueKnot's shirt, the classic sign of a heist gone wrong. Behind them the alarms of the bank blared and a few gunshots rang out, cracking the glass of the back window. 
 
 `` The blood, it's everywhere! It's everywhere!'' screamed /u/psycho_alpaca from the front seat, a half handle of whiskey in his hand, a quarter of it on his shirt from the swerving drive to the bank and another quarter of it in digestion. 
 
 `` Look,'' Seethed Lexi, turning in her seat, `` You're not even a mod. I'm really not sure why you're here, but-'' 
 
 `` Watch the goddamn road!'' Screamed Psycho, shoving Lexi's arm. The car took a sharp turn, narrowly avoiding a [ squirrel ] ( https: //www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/2z5ly5/wp_you_swerve_to_avoid_a_squirrel_unknown_to_you/ ) that streaked across the road. In the rear view mirror, Psycho could have sworn that the squirrel gave him a small salute as he disappeared into the sunset, but he that could have just been the whiskey talking. 
 
 `` God, what happened in there?'' Asked Lexi, taking another sharp turn, and sloshing Psycho's whiskey, `` I told you to follow my [ advice ] ( https: //www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/33oar9/ot_ask_lexi_1_how_to_start_writing/ ), and this shit would n't happen. Ca n't you do anything Luna?'' 
 
 From beneath her cloak, Luna removed a eleven and three quarters inch wand, cored with unicorn hair, and began muttering words coupled with flashes of bright color in the back seat. It was common knowledge that Luna was a recent graduate of Hogwarts, as this was the only explanation for her [ seemingly endless and accurate tales about the school ] ( https: //www.reddit.com/r/Luna_Lovewell/comments/2xdhvr/house_ambaret/ ). 
 
 `` There's nothing I can do. He's too far gone. I do n't know what happened, he just kind of froze up like he was hit by a Petrificus Totalus!'' Said Luna, sweat on her brow. *God, * she though, *Write a few stories here and there, and this is what happens. I really did n't know what I got into when I started this business. * 
 
 `` Not another one!'' Said Lexi, `` He's gone inactive!'' 
 
 `` Whatever it is, it's beyond my control.'' Said Luna. 
 
 `` Well did we at least get any money?'' 
 
 `` No money, but we did get these. It's the usual haul.'' Luna shook out a bag, emptying a mound of assorted sweat shirts, snoo dolls, and gift cards onto the seat. Psycho pocketed a few gift cards as Lexi made another turn ( technically it is n't stealing if you ca n't remember you did it ), and TrueKnot breathed his last in the back seat. 
 
 The middle seat was empty- it had once been occupied by /u/rpwrites, who had disappeared for some time, and would one day hopefully be a part of the gang again. 
 
 As the car streaked away, the door of the bank opened behind them. A figure stepped out, his silhouette dark, and a hood covering his face. 
 
 `` Finally,'' He whispered, `` It's all according to plan. They'll never know how it happened.'' 
 
 With a maniacal laugh, /u/MajorParadox removed his hood, and took the vacancy to become the [ new ] ( https: //www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/3p9ysu/ot_the_right_stuff_a_call_for_moderators/ ) writingprompts mod. 
 
 **** 
 
 By Leo 

