[ WP ] Whilst restocking a vending machine , a janitor finds something horrific jammed inside .

Gilbert had spent an majority of his evening cleaning, as he always did. At 8:15pm, with a majority of the sweeping done, he would move to restocking what few vending machines this particular hall under his care had. It was never anything big or amazing but the children of this sine establishment had a sweet and salt tooth that he was more than happy to oblige. 
 
 And, it was this particular evening of the third of April that he found that one of his usual machines was empty. Normally this particular machine dispensed twizlies, gumgums, chocolate drops, and a multitude of diabetic baubles that every child seemed to have an affinity for. But today, this Friday of the third, it lay more barren than a front lawn in California during a drout. It was sad almost and Gilbert found himself wondering just how the entirety of the contents had been purchsed given these kids usually spent it on the liquid caffine down the hall a ways. 
 
 It was then that Gilbert, being all of six feet, noticed the glimmer of green down in the bottom of the machine. The unmistakable twinge of color that spoke to his wallet and bank account in ways that he had no choice but to listen. Fumbling a moment with his keys, he managed to locate the aged, inhereted key among the multitude that lived on his ring. With a quick shove and turn, nothing. Gilbert was at a loss for words, giving only a grunt of disbelief. Here he was trying to do his job and it was the key the failed him. Nevermind, he thought as he removed the key only then be made aware of the fact that the reasin his aged key had n't worked was because the door to the machine was already open. 
 
 Hoodwinked! Swindled! He lay open the door and looked to see that nothing had indeed remained save for the neat stack of cash seated at the bottom of the machine. From what he could see it was a neat little stack of twenties with a colored band around it. $ 1000 you say? Thank you, he thought. 
 
 Of course, upon retrieval, the stack proved more sinister than he could ever imagined. The bills were heavier than they should have been. Stockier than they should have been. Greener than they should have been. Turning the stack over he was shown why. 
 
 CANDY AND SWEETS ARE OF THE DEVIL. 
 REPENT AND BE SAVED. 
 GOD IS RISEN. 
 
 So there he stood, staring a the heavy words with no snacks, no money, and strugling to find the words that he would have to use to explain his current perdicament. Mr. Bonavista was not going to like this. He was not going to like this one bit.
