[ PI ] The Girl in the Whale - FirstChapter - 3605 Words

Hello! 
 
 I'm on of the people judging for Group A. Thank you for posting your story! It was a nice, carefree exposition, and I very much enjoyed the detail you put into maintaining the emotions of the characters. One thing I will say, despite that this is a raw, rough draft, is that it's a bit cluttered. Sometimes it's difficult to understand who is speaking, as there are n't line breaks when a new character speaks or takes an action. But that's just a small criticism, the majority of the story is very well written. Thank you again, and good luck in the contest!
