[ WP ] You have decided to end your life . You go to the Golden Gate Bridge and jump off . The second you hit the water , you wake up .

When I was younger, I never really understood why someone would want to end their life. A friend once described it to me as skipping to the end of a book. You have no connection to any of the characters, no concern for the plot, and not a care for even the setting. All you want is to know how it ends. 
 
 If you do n't care, then what's the point of even skipping to the end? Closure, I suppose. 
 
 I needed that closure. 
 
 It's sunny today. Why today of all days? Maybe I should wait until tomorrow. It would be selfish of me to ruin anyone else's day. 
 
 I guess that is where my problem lies. I've always wanted the best for everyone else. Even if I was having the worst of days, I'd have to smile. I needed to smile. At least, that's what I tell myself. Never mind. You have to have tough skin. The sun wo n't hide for me. 
 
 The bridge seems busier than usual. This is good. Perhaps no one will notice. Slipping through the railing seemed to be a lot easier than it should have been. Especially given the history of this bridge. Does anyone even notice me? Luck seems to be on my side, for once. Impeccable timing. 
 
 Looking down, the water does n't even look real. Well, from what I can tell. The sun reflects off of each wave and is almost blinding. Fucking sun. The number of car horns is distracting my tranquility. Are they actually acknowledging me or are they annoyed with the other cars? Either way, this is my day and no one will intervene. 
 
 I have never given much thought to *how* I was going to do it. Do I jump? Lean forward and let it happen? Too late to decide- I can hear sirens in the distance. Are they coming for me? How did they get word so quickly? Were they finally acknowledging me? Too late. Now is the time. I take one final breath in, let go of the railing, and begin my ending. 
 
 They always say your life flashes before your eyes right before you die. Aside from the sun's blinding reflections, what I saw were all of the sacrifices I made for everyone else. Such a depressing final thought. They never did thank me, no kind gestures in return, nothing. They took me for granted. How ever will they go on without me? They need me. I should've written a no -- 
 
 **bzzt bzzt bzzt** 
 
 Who's calling me this early in the morning? I grab my phone only to realize it was my alarm. Why am I in bed? It all felt so real. Was this another chance? The date on my phone still reads the same as it did the day I jumped off the bridge. Is this a joke? 
 
 It's unusually dark in my room this morning. Opening the curtain, I realize it's raining outside. More like storming, actually. Is this a joke? Because it's making me crack a smile. It's as if my ending was n't good enough. I have to do it again. I need to do it. The weather is fitting. No one likes bad news on sunny days. Time to get walking, I suppose. This is the perfect day for closure. 
 
 Edit: spelling & rambling
