[ WP ] Two serial killers stumble upon each other while hiking . Both find the other to be the perfect next victim .

*A crunch. * 
 
 Tim froze, his right hand still holding onto a stick with a marshmallow at the end. The fire lit the whites of his eyes and he slowly scanned his surroundings. Dark, dark, dark. 
 
 Everywhere except- 
 
 A flurry of movement and Tim found himself lying down, his back against the cold earth. 
 
 `` WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?'' A bearded man spat in his face, and Tim shrank away at his fish breath. 
 
 `` Jesus christ eat a mint or something,'' Tim mumbled, and grimaced; `` I mean, for fucks sake do you even brush?'' 
 
 The bearded man paused and threw Tim away. He stood up and looked at the moon, a bright crescent among the stars. Clouds gathered for a moment and wiped away the light. Even the moon did n't want to smell his breath. 
 
 The bearded man turned around; `` Do you even know who I am? Say that again to me you disrespectful piece of shit!'' 
 
 Tim backed slowly and withdrew a Glock from his tent. He waved it so it glinted into the bearded man's eyes. 
 
 `` Say what again?'' said Tim. 
 
 The man glanced at the gun and back at Tim; `` I'm sorry mate, calm down, put it down!'' He began to put his hands up but whipped around and aimed his own glock against Tim! 
 
 `` Haha! Gotcha now bitch! Who's the boss now? I am! Yea! Steve the killer! Steve the Serial Killer!'' He laughed and winked at Tim. 
 
 Steve, Tim thought, was the famed serial killer in Yaddy Town. The same town that Tim was operating in. He drew a breath; Steve was his competition. He opened his mouth, `` You're ruining my business Steve the *killer*. Know who I am?'' 
 
 Steve the killer did not know who this person was. Through the two inch skin on his scalp and past the bumpy white ivory of his thick skull, the pink brain began to work, the gears grinding after years of slumber. 
 
 Tim decided to save Steve the trouble of thinking, when he saw Steve's eyes began to roll towards the back of his head. 
 
 `` I'm Tim.'' He said. `` Tim, terrifying Tim of Yaddy Town.'' 
 
 `` Terrifying Tim? That's you?'' 
 
 Tim nodded. 
 
 Steve shook his head, `` Well I never! Terrifying Tim! Right here! In front of my own pistol! HAH!'' 
 
 Terrifying Tim wanted to pull the trigger, he needed to. Commissions were down sixty percent all because Steve the Serial Killer had started in the same line of work in the same town. Tim was living on potatoes and tears by the end of the year. He gripped his gun harder, determined to end this with Steve's death. 
 
 Meanwhile Steve was glaring hard down the view of his own gun. Terrifying Tim had sabotaged many of his operations, leaving him many `` uncompletions'' he called it, a failure, a miserable loss, something that had bought his reputation down a notch. Killing Terrifying Tim meant he could be the biggest serial killer of all time. He would be applauded, hugged, given beer and chicken at many underground pubs. He needed to kill Tim. 
 
 They stared at each other and pointed their guns for a full five minutes before Steve blurted out; `` Are you gon na shoot or what? Ya coward!'' 
 
 Tim responded; `` I'll shoot you before you shoot me!'' 
 
 `` Imma shoot you before YOU shoot ME!'' Steve shouted. 
 
 `` No, I'm the best shooter there is in Yaddy Town, everyone knows that!'' 
 
 `` NO, you WERE the best UNTIL I came in!'' 
 
 `` NO, YOU are a fucking idiot who ca n't tell the difference between a..'' 
 
 Tim was at a loss for words. He needed a good analogy to topple this mentally impaired serial killer. He looked around for something, anything to spur his mind a good metaphor, a simile, anything! 
 
 Steve laughed; `` You call ME an idiot and you ca n't even finish a sentence! BAHAHAHAHA!'' 
 
 Tim gave a snarl and leapt to his feet, pressed the trigger- 
 
 BANG! 
 
 ____________________________ 
 
 To an unknown person, perhaps sleeping a few rivers away, it sounded like one shot. In fact, it were two shots that started and ended at the same time. Two days later, the person would perhaps stumble onto a campground and see two bodies lying opposite each other. Both were lying in bloody puddles and the person would perhaps examine the bodies to find one gunshot in one's head and the other in one's groin. The bearded man took on in the head. The other one took one in the groin. The person would perhaps check the belongings on the bodies and would find that it was not Steve, Steve the serial killer of Yaddy Town, but Nate. Nate the nutcracker. 
 

