Describe every Decade of a Human Life , like you are Currently in that stage of life . [ WP ] ( X/Post )

-Diary Entries- 
 
 5 
 Today mommy took me to my first day of kindergarten. Miss Johnson taught me how to spell `` kindergarten''. She told me that I am smart. I want to be smart like her too. I saw the boy across the street. He is in my class. I forgot his name but my mommy takes me to playdates at his house sometimes. He is nice. One time he gave me a daisy in his backyard. He told me he was in love with me. I think he is my boyfriend. My friend Ellie says that she wants a boyfriend. I do not want a boyfriend because boyfriends and girlfriends kiss and I think that's gross. Some of the other girls told me on the playground that boyfriends and girlfriends do other things like make babies too. Ellie does n't believe it, but I do because they're older and they know better than us. The boy tried to kiss me in class but I left to go color with the crayons. The other girls in my class are jealous because they think the boy is cute but I do not think so. 
 
 15 
 Today, I went to my first day of high school. It sucks. I mean, I have so much more freedom, but I do n't want to be here. I saw Ellie in the hallway. She really changed a lot over the summer. I stopped talking to her last year, when she hit me for telling her mom about her crazy diets. She lost 10 pounds in 2 months. I saw her smoking a cigarette, and her eyes are fully lined. She has n't gained the weight back. Speaking of weight, I'm a bit nervous for Saturday. I have a date with Drew, and my parents are n't going to be home. What if he thinks I'm a bit pudgy? The week before, we were at a party, and we went upstairs alone, but then Drew's friend Jake came in and argued something about how I was n't in the mindset from the shots I took. Drew did n't look too happy, but he left the room. Jake carried me downstairs and told me no to do anything with Drew since he was a jerk who liked to take advantage of girls. I rolled my eyes and told him he did that too. Jake told me, `` I do n't, and I could n't stand if it happened to you''. I do n't know what that means, and I did n't get an answer since I passed out. Jake's parents and mine are close since we live right across the street from each other, so I guess he decided to let me sleep on his bed. Jake's nice, and I thought he might've had a thing for me, but I saw him at football practice, and this cheerleader came out onto the field after practice and they kissed. My mom's worried about my grades. I'm in an honor roll class for biology and I get everything I read in the textbook, but I do n't really care too much about my grades. I'll pass in the end. 
 
 25 
 Today, I started my first day of work. It's a humdrum office job. I just ca n't wait until the weekend so I can go to this grand opening of a club downtown. I heard Drew is scraping by as a waiter at a nearby McDonalds and I want to stop by and see what's going on. I ca n't believe I lost my virginity to that asshole. I was really a partier in high school. I got lucky though. I got my shit together by junior year and my grades picked up and now I've got a 50k paying job. It's boring, but thats a hell of lot more that Drew. 
 
 
 Wait- I just received news that Ellie's in the hospital for a heart attack. I guess the anorexia and nicotine took a toll on her heart. Jake called me crying. I have n't heard from him much either. Screw the club this weekend. We're going to see her. 
 
 35 
 Today, I started my first day as a housewife. Well, almost. Jake and I decided that Nikki needs a mom to be at home, since the babysitter is n't enough. Now that we have Keeia, it's going to be hard, so as soon as I get home from the hospital, I'm making a call to the firm to tell them my decision to resign. I remember the last time I was in a hospital, It was watching Ellie die hooked up to the machine. When I gave birth to Nikki, I had such a fear of the hospital, I gave birth at home. I'm over it though. I'm more nervous about the income. The economy's not too well, and we're raising two girls. But Jake told me not to worry and he held me close and kissed my forehead, and it felt better than anything. I wish I could've given him my purity. I wasted it. I have to move into Jake's old house back home by December, so I can be close to my mom as she's getting old. Jake's parents passed away a few months ago, so the house is empty. I ca n't wait to ride back through and feel the nostalgia. 
 
 45 
 Today, I started my first day of getting my life back together.I'm going to Las Vegas next week, to rekindle my nightlife passion. Just to get my mind off things. It feels like everything is taxes, bills, receipts and not enough time. Nikki's starting high school next year and all the damn forms I have to fill out keep piling on. So does the weight. I hope Nikki does n't do anything like I did when I was her age. Jake is stressed too, and he seems distant but I know he loves me. 
 
 55 
 Today I started my first day of self-loathing. Jake found out about my relationship with Cory. I hated Cory anyway, but I just felt so out of touch with Jake. I really do love Jake. I do n't know why I did it. Jake lost his passion. But I still love him. How could I do that to Jake when he was there everyday of his life for me. Jake called me into his kitchen, showed me the text from his friend, and asked me if it was true. I cried and said yes. He just sat there at the table, took, off his glasses, and his lips quivered and said okay. I could n't stand to look at his eyes and I ran off. I hate myself. I heard him sobbing in the bathroom before I went on a drive. I think he's getting the divorce paper tomorrow. 
 
 65 
 Today, I started seeing Jake again at a cafe. He saw me and came over. We have n't talked in almost 7 years. It tore Nikki and Keeia apart, but they're grown up now. I told him my back has been aching and my knees have been sore and he had a sad look on. We both told each other that we have n't been in any relationship since the court date. He asked me if I wanted to see him again sometime, and I told him of course. He's retired now, and you can see his tiredness in wrinkles on his cheeks. 
 
 75 
 Today I started my first day of depression. Jake passed away in my arms, and his funeral is the day after tomorrow. He looked so happy but tired, but he was happy to be tired as long as it was to be making me happy too. That's what his friends said about him as they came to visit. I cried as they left. I'm not bothering commiting suicide, but my depression and old age will get me soon enough. Nikki and Keeia visited today and I held them close. I have the flower he picked up from our backyard 3 days ago as we reminisced about childhood. It was a daisy. I put it in a vase.
