[ CC ] I wrote these stories recently here on WP , and would like to share them with my friends ; however , I feel like they could be tuned up a bit . Any thoughts on how to make improvements is greatly appreciated .

First off, there is nothing inherently wrong with your works. All of them offer interesting snippets to bigger stories and I applaud you for being able to change from one genre to the other. I myself have problems being able to concoct coherent stories in anything other than fantasy. 
 
 That being said, I found your stories to be too dependent on dialogue. 
 
 In your first story, when the king is talking to his pupil, you do try to give a little description about what is going on ( the pupil bows ), but it comes off as a little awkward and empty, to me anyway. You have these huge blocks of dialogue, but the human body does n't just stand around, and voices are n't just voices. Each action and sound should create a subtle atmosphere for the reader to pick up on. In other words, give a little more background ( short history, description of the room, their clothes, etc., ) and give a little more insight into what the character ( s ) think ( s ) and notice ( s ). 
 
 The second story was my favorite, and you seemed to get more into the description of things, but then you phased into only dialogue when that memory could have been full of explanation and feeling. And I personally feel `` He weeps...'' was a little disappointing. Classic case of `` show do n't tell.'' 
 
 The third story was pretty much the same, but I can see you trying harder to get more description in. Keep working on it! 
 
 As an aside, whenever a new person speaks ALWAYS start a new paragraph. Sometimes you can get away with it, not in most cases though. 
 
 Please do n't let any of this discourage you. I'm only one person. The person who commented before me thought everything was great! And I'm sure your friends will love it! What's the point in writing something if you do n't share it? 
 
 Good luck and happy writing!: D
