[ WP ] Satan gathers up all the lesser demons and announces that they 're going to be adding another sin to the seven deadly sins and whoever comes up with it gets to be in charge of that department .

Alright everyone, thank you for coming. 
 
 Before we begin, I must just say how proud I am of all of you for your contributions. I can tell we are going to have a great time working through all these suggestions on our way to the New Sin, and I look forward to this being a great and inclusive learning experience. Special thanks to Halphas for the muffins. 
 
 Ooookay, moving on. I understand we're all here after hours, and even though we are n't being paid, I can assure you that your enthusiasm is being noted here and it really shows your commitment to Hellcorp. 
 
 Legion, please bring me the suggestion box. 
 
 No not you, other Legion. 
 
... nevermind, I'll get it myself. 
 
 OK. Let's look at the first suggestion. Feels like a good one! Haha. Here we go. 
 
 `` LAZINESS'' 
 
 Alrighty everyone, I think now would be a good time to review the intent of the feedback program and explain some of the rules so that we can further improve on sin detection as we move into the next quarter. 
 
 So the idea behind this program was to decide upon an 8th'Deadly Sin'. A totally new one. You all know the 7, it was part of your induction. If anyone missed out on the 7 Deadly Sins part of your induction please report to Layer 4 on Tuesday with your training folder and a note from your manager. 
 
 Now, `` laziness'' is already a sin. Out of the 7 Deadly Sins, it would be covered by `` Sloth''. Yeah, sloth is n't just an animal. It also means slow or idle and that's apparently bad so it's a sin. 
 
 Hmm? No Tim, sloth animals do not come to hell. Yes, it would be pretty cool, but no. Only humans can come to hell, I'm afraid. 
 
 Movi... yes, I'm aware sloths are a similar shape to humans. Two arms, two legs. No, I do n't think I've seen one walking upright, perhaps you are thinking of an ape and those do n't come to hell either. 
 
 Humans only. Clear? 
 
 No, James. You could n't possibly have seen an ape in hell last week, and this is n't the first time I've been concerned about your racism. You will report to HR before Friday, do you understand? 
 
 Good. 
 
 Now, moving on. Come on, focus people. I know we're tired. We can do this. Alright, next suggestion, aaaaand... 
 
 `` VIOLENCE'' 
 
 Alright, alright! Pipe down. Come on everyone. There are no bad suggestions. Just suggestions we can learn from as we move forward, OK? OK. 
 
 `` WAR'' 
 
 Obviously war is just very widespread, organised violence, and this is all covered by Wrath as Janice so helpfully pointed out a moment ago. So we'll just go to the next one. 
 
 `` I'' oh dear `` I LOVE YOU SATAN'' 
 
 Hoho, ok, ok, pipedown everyone. Obviously not a serious suggestion, haha. Someone gunning for that promotion, perhaps. Are you winking at me Mammon? It's OK if you are, but if you were n't I understand. No? OK. Alright. I'll just put that in the joke pil... I mean, I'll put that in my drawer here. No point hurting anyone's feelings accidentally now, is there? Moving on. 
 
 `` LAZINESS'' again. 
 
 So I think I'm just gon na skip any that repeat from now on OK? Ooohkay. 
 
 `` RAPE'' 
 
 Great suggestion, everyone. Really great work here. It's just a little tricky because rape would already be covered by Wrath and... yes Bob, Lust. Wrath and Lust are already plenty deadly enough, we do n't want to create a redundancy here, so Rape is almost there but just missed out I'm afraid. 
 
 Hmm? For getting raped? Well... is this your suggestion? Are you sure? Well, no, getting raped is n't the same as raping someone else, which we've already discussed... how could it be lust? 
 
 `` If they liked it''??? Look I feel like we're heading off on a tangent here, people. And no... `` sloth''? How could getting raped be sloth? 
 
 `` Just laying there''??? Jesus Christ, Martin. You can visit HR with James this week, and I expect both of you to have passed sensitivity training before the end of financial year. 
 
 Some of you need to be very ashamed of yourselves. 
 
... Or very proud of yourselves. 
 
 Check the company intranet for your job description to check which you should be. 
 
 I'm going to have to speed this up, everyone. Dinner's in the oven. Alright. 
 
 `` STEALING'' 
 
 Look, I think we'll have to conduct a company-wide audit of sin awareness and come back to this program. Stealing would be covered by Greed, which is one of the pre-existing sins. It really looks like some of you failed to properly prepare for this, and it's a fairly significant part of the `` Helcome!'' induction you all did when you started, so I'm not sure anyone should have an excuse. 
 
 Look, let's try one more suggestion, and see if we ca n't get something positive out of this meeting. 
 
 `` BLASPHEMY'' 
 
 Now we're talking! I do n't think that's already covered by one of the 7 Deadly Sins. Bit of a leap to Wrath, I agree, Denise, it's different to any old swear word. Definitely a special case. 
 
 Looks good so far, people. SWOT analysis? Let's list them. 
 
 OK what are it's Strengths? It's'common', yes, good.'Easily judged' definitely, good work Eduardo. Oh dangit, does anyone have a fresh whiteboard marker? Thanks. Alright keep going.'Sounds sinny' err yes OK. 
 
 Now: Weaknesses.'Just swearing'.'Gives unnecessary respect to the Creator'. Yep. Good. 
 
 Opportunities?'Instant results'... well what do you mean by that? 
 
 Just now? 
 
 Oh come on. That was **in this meeting**. It does n't count. 
 
 I'm sure Martin will forgive me. Huh? No the handbook just says we do n't *normally* do any forgiving down here. I'm sure it's fine. 
 
 I'm already here for a long time. I do n't see what... I think you're being unreasonable about this. 
 
 Ugh, okay okay okay, fine. Looks like we have the new sin picked out everyone. James? Martin? I'll see you two at HR tomorrow as all three of us add sensitivity training to our performance improvement plans. 
 
 Goodnight everyone. We'll see you bright and early at the coffee machine. Haha. 
 
 ^What ^a ^goddam ^circus... yeah yeah, I know, **sorry, I forgot**!
