[ WP ] Showers become sentient and try to kill you by being too pleasant to leave .

It happened gradually. New thermostatic valves were released, installed by the council free of cost in every home to promote energy efficiency. As a result, the energy companies lowered their prices. Next came the automatic timers - now, showers could only be had in twenty, thirty, sixty minute sessions. Even if you'd finished, you might as well stay in until the time is up. After all, showers were now cheap and efficient. 
 
 Over the last year, things have changed. Its common for people to turn up for work still damp and wrinkly and glowing from the heat of the shower. After all, promoting good hygiene is in the interests of businesses now. 
 
 There are occasional, intermittent reports of people falling asleep and being burned in the shower. The units were malfunctioning,'unusual'.'Average shower temperature increasing', the headlines read.'CEO of prominent energy company swears by long showers to combat the stress of modern life'. There are no longer time limits on the showers. 
 
 People are turning up late to work now, or missing work. Some because they stayed in the shower for hours last night, some because they could n't face stepping out of the shower into the cold this morning. The market for shower seats is booming, no longer limited to the elderly or unwell. On morning chat shows there are laughing conversations around how'clever' the new showers are. About how, just as you're thinking of getting out, the temperature drops slightly. The only thing to do is huddle back under the water to warm up before making that final step. It's just like pressing the snooze button, everyone does it two... or three... or five times. 
 
 The number of admissions to burns units in hospitals has risen. Great advances are being made in skin grafts and plastic surgery to the benefit of humanity. Gurus and spiritual leaders are promoting the importance of dreams that occur when asleep in the shower or deep in a daydream. The voices heard in those dreams offer advice, or suggestions. There is no mention of the fact that these voices are not heard when sleeping elsewhere. 
 
 Reports of'shower deaths' rarely make it into the headlines now. Long showers and high temperatures are thought to trigger heart attacks or strokes in those who were already susceptible. Unfortunate really. 
 
 Those who have become suspicious have resorted to washing out of buckets or in rivers, and are a pitied minority. The rest of us continue enjoying our relaxing daily routine, having both our muscles and our egos massaged by the flow of water and the gently insistent voices. We work hard. We deserve this. We should lie back and close our eyes. We wo n't notice the temperature slowly rising. We can no longer feel the water, numbing our nerves and removing our last element of self protection while we are at our most vulnerable.
