[ WP ] Aliens studying human religion are horrified and fascinated by many practices . One particular fact is especially vexing : this is the afterlife .

The Professor sat. Consulting his papers. At least, Professor is probably the best translation for his position. It's hard to describe an alien spieces' conceptions of hierarchy, intellectual authority, and status without going into a long speel, so for now, Professor will do. 
 
 He was head of the Humanity and Religion project. A several trillion pound research grant to understand Earth's religious practices. The Zanee'irr ( that's probably as close a transliteration you could get with the roman alphabet and a human mouth ) had been studying human's for about three centuries, covertly of course. There were n't many sentient life forms in the galaxy. Plenty of life. Mostly plants. Sometimes a highly developed fish. There were less than half a dozen sentient life forms. Of which only three ( including humanity ) were space-faring. Of which only one, the Zanee'irr were capable of interstellar travel. The Zanee'irr lived long lives, by human standards, and had an insatiable thirst for knowledge. They studied humanity, to understand them. Perhaps in a few thousands years, they could introduce themselves, welcome them into the small family of sentient beings. 
 
 Religion, of course, was a human concept. Not to say that the Zanee'irr did n't have their own ideas about creation, worship, ritual. But every species develops their own categories, the Zanee'irr had learned, and it's best to use a species own categories to understand them. That goes without question. So as it became evident that almost all of humanity had a religion, and those that did n't spoke about not having a religion, it became clear that religion was important. 
 
 Most of religion was familiar. A creator, the Zanee'irr had their own ( well several, depending who you asked ). Ethical teachings, yep, plenty of those. Even the idea of a Prophet ( or saint, or holy man ) had equivalents in Zanee'irr history. 
 
 But there was one idea, so utterly bizarre, that even comprehending it was difficult. The afterlife. Life after death. The resurrection. This was what the Professor had been wrestling with for about a decade, sitting in his solitary room, consulting his masses of papers, recordings, and observations. 
 
 The professor understood that some ideas were idiosyncratic. The Eeslooans, a primitive species about twenty galaxies away, had the conception of pre-life. The only species with such an idea as far as the Professor knew. Unlike other lifeforms, the Eeslooans existed as a sap on trees, in low-level communication with other saps. They only achieved sentience after being pollenated by a particular flower, after which they became less plant and more animal. They remembered their pre-sentient existence, as a simple lifeform. It's fascinating. Unique even. But comprehendable. Unfamiliar, but somehow easily translated. 
 
 By contrast, the after-life. Life after death. A very contradiction of terms. Death is the end of life, and if it is n't, then why call it death? And there was nothing, utterly nothing, to suggest the humans continued with some sort of sentience after what they called death. No communication. No energy. 
 
 An abberation perhaps? But somehow,, all humans had a conception. Some denied belief in it, but they nonetheless understood, often spoke about life in the same way. Whether developed urbanites or simple hunter-gather tribesman, afterlife was there. 
 
 The professor had managed, at least in part, to link afterlife to the soul. The humans believed they were immaterial. Or part of them was. That it continued. Their soul was something that was, but that was n't. Again, a contradiction in terms that seem so utterly natural to the human but so utterly incomprehendible to the Zanee'irr. 
 
 The professor shuffled away his papers. Decided that perhaps it was best to abandon the last decade or so as a lost cause, and begin to look at another human phenomemon all together. He picked up a blank sheet of paper, `` celebrity worship''. Perhaps this will be easier to understand, he mused. 
 

