[ WP ] You are the luckiest person on Earth . Everything you make an attempt for works in your favor . However , there two catches : you are absorbing the luck of those around you , and anyone who tries to profit from your luck ( even with your help ) is met with the worst luck immediately .

Another exceptionally weird day. It's not the weirdest but it definitely belongs in the top five. Let me explain to you. I am lucky. Like really really lucky. In such a way that I could jump in front of a car and meet my soul mate. Of course I ca n't do this because - what an irony - I seem to bring bad luck to whomever I try to help out even talk to. Which brings me to why today was weird. 
 
 Normally I go about my day just as any other ( lonely ) person would. I go shopping for groceries, I sleep and eat. I even go to work even though I won the lottery multiple times ( I stopped playing to give other people a chance ). But I do it alone and have done so for the last fifty years because of the aforementioned reason. 
 
 But today I did n't shop and I did n't eat. I also did n't sleep. Because today I was abducted by the mafia. It was unusual for me to be abducted because I am lucky and abduction seems like something only unlucky people would have to go through and I was n't one of them. At first I thought they wanted my money but I was wrong. You know how mafia guy always ( well not the bosses but the rest ) appear to be normal people to the unknowing? Well it turns out the guy who sells the lottery tickets is one of them. And those idiots wanted me to fill out tickets for them. Well, they got arrested while going to cash them in and I got a good story to tell to nobody. Where is my luck here, you ask? You know, I am probably the luckiest person in the world but everyone has bad luck sometimes. Life goes on. 
 
 Hope you enjoyed it, somehow I loved that prompt. It's also only the second one I have done so be harsh with your critic: ) 
 
 I would also love for someone more skilled than me to write about a superhero who fucks over bad guys by trying to help them.
