[ WP ] You suddenly find your doors and windows wo n't open . You log in to Reddit and find the most upvoted thread with over a million comments and just two hours old `` Help , my door is stuck , any tips to get it open ? ''

The mouse idea did n't work. I knew it was another troll, but I ca n't just sit here doing nothing, can I... Can I? No, no, I have to keep trying before I run out of air. I mean logically it makes no sense, putting the mouse inside my anus has no possible relation to the phenomena effecting my doors and windows, but *none* of this makes sense. It's not a sudden increase in humidity causing wood to swell, my windows are PVC. It ca n't be coincidence, r/theydidthemath calculated it as a statistical impossibility... 
 
 Someone will work it out soon, just keep refreshing... 
 
 ( 12 new comments ) 
'Donald trump is behind it' 
 No, that does n't sound right. Downvote. 
'PLEASE HELP ME I'M PANICKING' 
 `` Yeah, are n't we all buddy'' I say to myself, shaking my head despairingly. 
'Beeswax is good for preventing jams' 
 Another person ignorant of his own fate, trying to be helpful. 
 Just more of the same. No answers. 
 
 I shuffle on my seat, trying to sooth the dull ache. `` Too many fucking trolls nowadays....'' 
 
 Ah shit I clicked out of the thread, where is it again.... click TOP again that'll find it.... no ca n't see it, where is it? Oh wait, there it is, halfway down the page now, underneath some thread about how North America would look on Jupiter.... yeah I bet that'd be dwarfed, Jupiter's massive.... 
 Yeah thought so! Quickly check the comments, make sure they did n't post a misleading picture beofre I bank that in my memory... 
 > Can you imagine living if the earth was the size of Jupiter? Just travelling to the other side would take months with current technology. 
 
 The conversation that follows spans the intricacies of Boeing 747s, the current state of technology today and the quantum mechanics behind gravitational forces. Most people concur that the atmosphere would be too devoid of oxyge.... oh shit SHIT *SHIT* I just wasted half an hour while I burn through the remaining air in this room! I have to get out, quick.... 
 
 Where's that thread gone... 
 
 
 Ah there it is, near the bottom of the'top threads' page now. I expect that means everyone's found a way out! No harm in reading just one other thread first then... 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

