[ WP ] After a bad breakup , you take Reddit 's famous advice . Lawyer up , hit the gym , delete Facebook . The problem ? You are Mark Zuckerberg .

With half of Facebook stolen by his former wife in the divorce, Mark Zuckerberg saw no reason not to delete it. 
 
 `` I'll burn facebook to the ground before I let that money grubbing whore have half!' 
 
 DELETE. 
 
 *ONE YEAR LATER* 
 
 A more swole, more satisfied Zuckerberg floats contented in his pool. In the shallow end his harem of 19-24 year old girls from around the world played with an oversized beach ball. He counted roughly 7 girls, among them his most recent favorites the red haired Irish girl and the sleek one from Brazil. `` God, why did n't I do this sooner?'' 
 
 By the tone and frequency he could tell in about 2 minutes things were going to get freaky deeky. 
 
 _______ 
 
 On the other side of the country, Giselle posted on her new faceyspacer.com account, `` Where have all the good men gone?'' as she sat alone with her apartment full of cats and ill begotten divorce booty.
