[ WP ] You 've died and you 've woken up in a room when you see a table with a strange coin on it , a man emerges from the shadows and says `` one side is hell the other is heaven , flip the coin and hope for the best , or go to hell for 1 million years to guarantee yourself a spot in heaven afterwards ''

`` One million years?'' 
 
 `` Yes,'' he says. `` But after that, you are guaranteed a spot in heaven.'' 
 
 `` Humanity wo n't last a million years.'' I rolled my eyes at the stranger and snatched up the coin. 
 
 `` If you think that means an end to heaven and hell, then by all means, take your chances.'' 
 
 `` A million years, man. That's not even close to reasonable. This whole situation does n't even make sense!'' I turned the coin over and over in my hand, suddenly hesitant. 
 
 `` It's pretty reasonable considering the life you lived on earth. We debated your actions, and decided it all might as well come down to a toss up. Thou shalt not kill is a pretty big deal around here. However, so is an eye for an eye.'' He shrugged. `` We thought a coin toss fitting.'' 
 
 I sighed. I almost laughed. We'd all thought about this moment before, even sung about it. My boys and I had marched to it, run to it, and discussed it over many, many beers. 
 
 *When I get to heaven* 
 
 *Saint Peter Gon na Say-ayy* 
 
 *How'd you earn your living boy* 
 
 *How'd you earn your pay-ayy* 
 
 *I replied with a whole lot of anger* 
 
 *I made my living as an Airborne Ranger* 
 
 *When I get to He-ell* 
 
 *The Devil's gon na say-ayy* 
 
 *How'd you earn your living boy* 
 
 *How'd you earn you pay-ayy* 
 
 *I replied with a BOOT to his che-est* 
 
 *I made my living putting souls to re-est! * 
 
 I took a deep breath and flipped the coin. I'd be having a conversation soon no matter which way the damn thing landed.
