[ WP ] You are a dog who is trying to kill its master , but the family 's cat stops you at every turn .

Jack had a great relationship with Jenny, they had been together since he was just a pup. She always played with him, held him when there was a storm outside, and fed him the good stuff off the dinner table. None of that mattered anymore. He tried to warn her, he shouted `` Do n't think I do n't know what the V-E-T is! Do n't take me there! Please do n't take me to the vet!'' But she ignored his pleas. That's when everything changed. That's when he knew he could n't trust Jenny. That's when he made a commitment to himself. Once they cut Jack's balls off, he swore he would kill Jenny for taking him to the vet. 
 
 Jack had planned for this moment for weeks. He had to give himself some time to recover from his castration, build his strength back up, but today was the day. His plan was simple - wait for Jenny to fall into a deep sleep and bite his way to vengeance. Jack was not a smart dog, he knew he had to keep it simple if he was to succeed. This plan was perfect, except for one loose end: Sparkles. 
 
 God damn it... Sparkles, a furry ten pound mass of pure chaos with claws, fangs, and the sharpest senses. Sparkles did not understand that she was an unstable sociopath, and Jack understood even less of her motivations. At times, Jack and Sparkles were allies, cooperating against Jenny to get some delicious human food. Other times, they were merely roommates, not necessarily friend or foe. And yet other times Sparkles was a blood-thirsty spawn from hell with one and only one mission - to claw the ever-loving shit out of Jack's face. This was the real crux of the problem - not the Sparkles was a known enemy, but that she was totally and utterly unpredictable. 
 
 Sparkles was n't the only cat in the house. Frankie was an older tabby, who had reached the apex of apathy. Jack and Frankie had an understanding, Frankie would always say things like `` We're cool man. You dig?'' Jack honestly had no idea what the hell he was talking about, other than that it was positive sentiment. Frankie was infinitely more laid back than Sparkles, but at a certain cost - Frankie had been a heavy catnip user in his youth, making him relaxed but thoroughly demented. 
 
 His moment had come. Jack knew Jenny's habits well, and when she turned off the TV, he knew that she would be asleep soon. This is it, this was his opportunity. Jack just needed to wait a few minutes for Jenny to be in deep sleep and make sure Sparkles would n't interfere. 
 
 `` Hey Frankie... Psst, Frankie!'' Jack whispered from across the living room, but got no response. Frankie was passed out hard on the top of his scratching post. Jack wanted Frankie to be a lookout - he had n't seen Sparkles for hours and worried that she would somehow ruin his plan. 
 
 Jack crossed the room and nudged Frankie with his snout, whispering `` Psst... Frankie. Get up'' 
 
 `` What is it man, ca n't you see I'm sleeping? Killing my dreams man.'' grumbled Frankie. 
 
 `` Frankie, help a brother out - just keep a look out for Sparkles, and shout if she goes towards Jenny's room OK?'' urged Jack. `` Can you do that for me?'' 
 
 `` Yeah, whatever man, no sweat.'' mumbled Frankie. He was already one paw back into his dream. 
 
 Shit... Jack thought, Frankie was going to be no help at all. He felt he was losing his motivation, losing his conviction to go through with his plan. Then he remembered waking up, hazy with drugs, held together with stitches, and ball-less. He shook his head and focused on the task at hand. He made his way to Jenny's bedroom. 
 
 He was angry. He had a plan. He was ready to kill. Jack started approaching Jenny's bed, when a moment of panic hit him - there was Sparkles, sitting at Jenny's feet. She was awake and immediately aware of the fact that Jack was there, and not for cuddles. 
 
 `` Hmm hmm, Jack, what are ya doing there? Hmm?'' she said as her eyes twitched. This was one of Sparkles symptoms when she was in one of her batshit crazy moods. `` Still upset about the V-E-T huh? Hahaha!'' 
 
 `` Shut up Sparkles!'' throated Jack, `` You know why I'm here. I'm here to kill Jenny, and there's nothing, nothing you can do to stop me!'' 
 
 `` Oh, hmm, is that so? Hmm. I think you'll have a sudden change of heart in a moment, hmmm'' mocked Sparkles. 
 
 Jack knew it was now or never. He lunged forward, prepared to kill Jenny and Sparkles if he had to. He built up speed for his jump on to the bed when he saw it. Oh shit... Now he knew why Sparkles was acting so smug. Sparkles was sitting right next to his tennis ball. He knew he had to try to ignore it, but the iridescent yellow-green had already caught his eye. As he made his last bound before his leap on to the bed, Sparkles kicked the ball towards the kitchen and - 
 
 `` BALL! BALL BALL BALL BALL!'' Jack barked as he ran after his tennis ball, chasing it as it bounced off the floor and interior walls in the most fun and unpredictable way. Finally catching it, Jack began to wag his tail and started to return the ball to his owner. As he approached Jenny in her bedroom, she did not look like she wanted to play fetch. She had a mean look in her eyes. 
 
 Jenny snatched the ball out of Jack's mouth, and scolded him `` Bad dog! Bad dog! No barking at night!'' 
 
 As Jack sat there feeling hurt and confused, Sparkles started cackling maniacally `` Haaaahahahaha, so predictable... hmm... hmm of course.'' 
 
 Jack finally remembered what he was doing before his false game of fetch, but it was too late. Jenny was up, and Sparkles was on to him. 
 
 God damn it Sparkles.
