[ WP ] Combine two seemingly unrelated fields of study . Give it a name and describe a university class on that new field .

Welcome to *Introduction to Botanical Psychology*! Please read the syllabus in full. 
 
 You will need to buy the following textbooks: *That Smell is Actually Screams: The Language of Grass* by Peter Moss, *Mozart or Bob Dylan: A Friendly User's Guide to the Musical Preferences of Herbs* by Rosemary Green, and *Vegetarianism is a Mistake* by Thomas Ato 
 
 The semester will be split into 4 sections: 
 
 Section 1: You will learn the common misconceptions people have about vegetative happiness. You may think your potted palm tree is perfectly content to sit on your front porch, but if it suddenly had a voice it would give you a piece of its mind and probably demand to be moved closer to the shower. Also in this section we will cover the ethics of vegetarianism and forestry. Plants are deeply oppressed but literally can not speak for themselves. We are currently developing a tree translator that should greatly reduce these barbaric practices. Could you imagine your spinach screaming every time you went in to take a bite? So could we, and we think it would give you nightmares for the rest of your life. 
 
 Section 2: You will learn to interpret the feelings in your vegetable garden and exactly where each one should be planted for all of them to get along. Carrots and radishes clash tremendously and you do not want a full out, furious ( albeit silent ) war on your hands. Potatoes and parsley, on the other hand, get along splendidly and do n't be surprised if you find they've invited their parents over to meet each other one day. 
 
 Section 3: You will learn to interpret your household flowers' musical preferences. You may be shocked by your adolescent perennial's sudden shift toward death metal, but do n't be alarmed- it is only going through a phase and will probably appreciate Cream or the Kinks in another year or so. Also, you may think your rose is only interested in Vivaldi, but you would be surprised. Many roses have been known to appreciate Stravinski, Philip Glass, or even Metallica. 
 
 Section 4: Finally, you will learn the history of invasive species. It is commonly perceived that these plants are pests, but if you imagine that out of control blackberry bush as the mighty Genghis Kahn marching over Russia, you might think twice about hacking it to bits to save your begonias. Sometimes history plays out in mysteries ways. Nevertheless, we understand the need to protect certain species from extinction, at least until the botanical linguists can do a proper observational study. 
 
 Course times are MWF 10-11AM in room 304 of the Psychology Building.
