[ EU ] Not every 00-agent gets to lead a life of beautiful cars and fast women . Tell the story of an agent assigned one of the unglamorous 00 numbers .

It's been months undercover and they finally picked me for a mission. The Saint street Skulls where one of the most notorious street gangs controlling Central America with a blood stained iron fist. All businesses paid a street tax to them and if not... well reports claim they are traded to a more violent foreign group called Daesh or something like that, Whatever happens after that is not pretty. I've been driving these fucks around for five months from village to village. I was sent here by MI6 because another mole reported they would attack Cuba posed as American military men on vacation to attempt to destroy their relations. most likely because the SSS had a dent made in their smuggling profit when trade was opened up. I was to become their go to guy for transport and become the driver of whatever they where using to lay siege upon Cuba and drive it towards a American aircraft carrier where i was to begin telling the crew we where being intercepted and needed to turn back then purposely get caught by the carrier. 
 
 Do n't ask how but i became head of transport, when you get past all the horrible murder and extortion the SSS runs pretty smooth. Today was the day of the attack so I flashed my flashlight three times into the forest where a scout watched for just that signal. the SSS monitored communications of their `` employees'' so the scout was the one who would message for the carrier to start making its voyage. We boarded a armored yacht and set sail with everyone wearing Nike or North face shit and attempting to speak in bad North American southern accents. The crew sung like pirates and drank from the near limitless supply of booze below deck, they did know how to party ill give em that. Days later I began to take us more far north but the crew never even noticed and finally i saw the grey dot in the distance. At that point i made sure the ship would keep going forward and went below deck to give me an excuse that i did n't run us into the battleship. The minutes felt like hours and every wave we hit was a blow to my sanity until finally i realized we must be close enough to get caught. Slowly walking up the steps i thought about maybe putting us back on course, if the SSS found out then i was fucked. But looking through the window i knew it was much to late, the beast of a ship towered over us and i could see a laser sight shine through and point at my heart. I frantically made the hand signal to show them i was the mole and the laser moved away presumably to another crew member. I smiled and shouted to them that we were being intercepted, a gunshots erupted. I steered the ship in the opposite direction putting the rest of the crew at the mercy of the snipers above and me at least somewhat protected, Surely a.50 caliber bullet could puncture through this damn ship. 
 
 `` GET THIS PIECE OF LITERAL FLOATING TRASH TO CUBA WE GOT TA GO'' I heard Rico yell then the sound of metal on metal and muffled gurgling. 
 
 My shitty flip phone buzzed in my jeans for the first time in months, unknown number. 
 
 `` 002, bloody fucking brilliant'' 

