[ EU ] instead of getting a buzz lightyear action figure , andy from toy story gets a Cthulhu figurine .

“ I don ’ t like him, ” Bo Peep said, taking a step back until the rear of her dress was flush against Rex ’ s over-sized leg. “ He ’ s scary looking. ” 
 
 “ And I ’ m not? ” Rex said, glancing down at Bo Peep. He opened his mouth to let out one of his patented roars, but stopped himself, his eyes instead falling to the new guy. He was certainly an intimidating fellow, his face covered in long, slimy tentacles, with two over-sized wings extending off his back. He wasn ’ t sure if he was some sort of octopus or alien, or if he was simply the result of a terrible melting accident. Whatever the case, Rex, of course, wasn ’ t scared. Nothing scared him. Still, he decided it was probably not the best idea to roar at the guy. 
 
 “ You ’ re a different kind of scary, ” Bo Peep said, still staring at the new toy. She eyed it up and down slowly, her hand wrapped around Rex ’ s gigantic right calf. “ I wouldn ’ t be afraid if I ran into you during the night. Him, he ’ s just plain scary. ” 
 
 “ He ain ’ t scary, ” Hamm said, poking his head out from beneath Andy ’ s bed. He had been sleeping, or rather attempting to sleep, and had absolutely no idea what the others were talking about. He assumed they were discussing Rex, as per usual, who was simply the least scary dinosaur he ’ d ever met. To be fair, however, Rex was also the only dinosaur he ’ d ever met during his relatively short life. “ He ’ s just a big lizard. ” 
 
 “ I resent that, ” Rex said, glancing over at Hamm. He opened his mouth and began a roar, but stopped himself again. Now was not the time. 
 
 “ Maybe we should just go over and talk to him, ” Slinky Dog said, poking his head in between Rex and Hamm. The upper half of his body was dangling off the top of Andy ’ s bed, the lower half of his torso somehow lodged between the mattress and the rough, off-white wall. 
 
 “ Are you insane? ” Bo Peep said, gently patting Slinky Dog on the head while remaining safely against Rex ’ s legs. “ He ’ ll probably eat us. ” 
 
 “ Who? ” Hamm said, searching the room for anything out of place. “ Rex? ” 
 
 “ No, ” Rex said. “ Him, the new guy. ” He pointed his short, green arm toward the octopus-esque figure poking out of the white, plastic bag on the table beside the front door. He hadn ’ t moved since Andy had dropped him off before leaving to eat lunch. He just sat there, his tentacled face staring down at them, wings slowly flapping. He looked absolutely menacing, but certainly didn ’ t scare Rex. Nothing scared Rex. 
 
 “ What in the heck is that, ” Hamm said, practically shouting. He took several steps backward until he was nearly underneath the bed, which he knew was far safer than being out in the open. 
 
 “ Andy just bought him. He was supposed to get one of those Buzz Lightyear dolls they had on the television, but he got that instead. It ’ s called a ‘ Cut-hull-huh, ” Slinky Dog said. He had been studying the new toy ’ s box while stuck atop the bed, practicing the pronunciation of the toy ’ s name since Andy had first dropped the bag off. It was possibly the most difficult word he ’ d seen in quite a while, the letters spelling out “ Cthulhu. ” He was pretty confident he ’ d pronounced it right. 
 
 “ It ’ s terrifying, ” Hamm said, now completely under the bed, his face poking out from the unmade sheets that nearly touched the floor below. “ Can we return it? ” 
 
 “ What are you all talking about? ” Woody said, hopping down off Andy ’ s bed. He had been attempting to untangle Slinky Dog ’ s lower half for the better part of the afternoon, but hadn ’ t made much progress. He feared they ’ d have to amputate, but that would be a discussion for another time. 
 
 “ New guy, ” Rex said, nodding toward Cthulhu. “ Everyone is afraid of him, but I don ’ t think he ’ s so scary. ” He made no attempt to roar. 
 
 “ Afraid? ” Woody said, talking a step toward the half-octopus, half-humanoid toy. “ Weren ’ t you all afraid of Mr. Potato Head the first time we saw him? Remember? Bo Peep wouldn ’ t even leave Barbie ’ s Dream House for the first week. Said that ‘ potatoes should be able to speak. ’ ” 
 
 “ That ’ s true, ” Mr. Potato Head shouted from the other side of the room, “ and it was incredibly racist. ” He had no interest in meeting the new guy, but had rather been searching for his nose while the others cowered by the bed. Unfortunately, he had made absolutely no progress toward finding it. However, he had discovered a second pair of eyes and was using them in place of his nose for the time being. Plus, it made it easier to search: twice the eyes, twice the ground covered. He glanced back down at the pile of assorted trash and resumed his search. 
 
 “ I say we give him a shot, ” Woody said, taking another step toward the toy. “ Hey, ” he shouted, “ I ’ m Woody. ” 
 
 Cthulhu glanced down at Woody, his head poking out from a white shopping bag. He ’ d been listening to what the others had been saying the entire time. He ’ d never before felt so unwelcomed, even back at the toy store. At least there he had others like him, he wasn ’ t just some out-of-place freak. In fact, he wouldn ’ t have even minded being returned, at least then they ’ d get one of their Buzz Lightyear dolls they seemed to want so much. He glanced back down at the bag and sighed. 
 
 “ Sorry about the others, “ Woody continued, “ they can be a bit nervous around new people. Say, do you like drawing? ” Woody grabbed Etch and quickly began turning his knobs, creating a very crudely drawn picture of a cat. “ Why don ’ t you come here and meet everyone, maybe see what you can draw on Etch over here. I ’ m not very good at it. ” 
 
 Cthulhu shrugged his shoulders, eyes still locked on the bag below as the tentacles on his face softly rustled its edges. He knew he could draw much better than the cowboy, he ’ d had a lot of practice back at the store. And, truth be told, he did kind of want to meet the others. He glanced up at Woody and began flapping his wings. 
 

