[ WP ] CERN is trying to open a portal to hell . Only they 're not trying to summon a demon to Earth . They 're trying to create a bridgehead for the human invasion of Hell .

`` I still do n't think this is a good idea...'' Steve said to no one in particular as he worked on his laptop. General Walker gave him a cold stare from across the room. 
 
 
 `` Dr. Hayes, we've explained this *countless* times to you. We are in the middle of an energy crisis and Hell is a renewable source!'' 
 
 Steve closed the lid of his laptop and looked at the General through thick-rimmed glasses. `` Now I'm not a religious man, Walker, but I do believe Hell exists. I also believe it would be a very bad idea to rip a big hole in dimensional space-time to go charging in. I mean, for all we know our weapons will do nothing against the Armies of the Damned.'' 
 
 
 A door at the far end of the room opened and a young scientist poked his head in. 
 `` Er, General, Doctor, We're ready to start.'' 
 
 
 General Walker Grinned and picked up his planner. Steve sighed and carried his laptop out the door. It was a short walk through the confined tunnels of the bunker to the portal room. This portal to hell was n't particularly dramatic or fancy - just a huge ring of magnets at the end of an underground 30 mile loop. Steve sat down at the centre control panel and plugged his laptop in. He was flanked by other scientist and military manning other consoles. General Walker gave orders to officer present, who either left the room or relayed the orders to NCOs. 
 
 
 `` We're ready to go, Dr Hayes. Press enter and let's get started.'' 
 
 
 `` It's not that - oh hell there's no point in explaining,'' Steve typed some commands into the console and the emergency lights came on. `` Ten seconds and we'll open a portal to Hell, General, I hope you're happy.'' He sat back and cross his arms. 
 
 
 Moments later, soldiers wheeled in a large crate and placed it in front of the portal. Steve sat bolt upright then turned to General Walker `` What the *hell* is that, Walker?,'' The General chuckled. 
 
 
 `` Your worry about our weapons being ineffective is n't totally unfounded, Dr. Hayes. But I doubt even The Damned can withstand the destructive force of a nuclear bomb.'' 
 
 
 The portal formed with a bright flash, a rippling black screen now filled the ring of magnets. The soldiers pushed the bomb through the portal before retreating behind blast shields. Moments later, the portal bulged out and there was an audible thud.
