[ WP ] Multiple religious scholars around the world have visions and dreams that God has left his post in Heaven to roam the Earth alongside humanity , making his temporary home in New York City . You are The Big Apple 's sharpest detective , tasked with tracking down Mr. Almighty .

'The search for Mr. Almighty' has been all over the media for the last month. Newspapers, blogs, social media, you name it. Hell, Mr. Almighty has even been made into a meme. Can you blame them though? Any time that The Pope, Franklin Graham, multiple respected rabbis, and allamahs agree on something its got ta be big. God has taken human form and is setting up shop in New York City. 
 
 Every detective in the city, and many from out of town and overseas have all been hired by one church, government, or religious society or another. I got a bunch of calls. This one was n't for the money though. Every once in a while a detective has to take a case for their own curiosity. 
 
 Let me get this straight, I am by no means religious. My parents did n't even take me to church as a kid. As soon as I started getting calls though, I got the feeling that this was big. I bought and read every religious text that I could find. The Bible? Of course. The Quran? Sure. I even read The Book of Mormon. The best stuff that I could find on God coming to earth though came from the Gospels. As I started to read those, I could n't keep myself from laughing. I finally understood what the hell everybody was doing going to all these random places looking for Mr. Almighty. A bunch of them would go to churches and temples which is obvious. Others would go to soup kitchens, half-way houses, brothels, courts and philosophy seminars. These were a bit better. The ones that killed me though were the guys that were going by the docks asking if any of the local fishermen had mysteriously up and quit in the last couple of weeks. What? Do these people think that God has no creativity? There is no way He's going to do the same old thing the second time around. None of these theories, even the good ones, did it for me though. I was thinking way smaller. 
 
 I have spent the last few weeks hanging out in cheap diners. The more unambiguous the better. Every one that I could find I would spend a week in going back every day. I spent hours in booths all across the city drinking more coffee than I ever have in my life. My theory was that he would be some bus boy or waiter that was quiet, but friendly. He would give advice to people that came in super late crying about heartbreaks and life change. He would talk to the drunks about what their goals were in life, and he would stump smart guys on philosophical issues. After the twelfth diner I visited though, I decided I needed a break. 
 
 I left Lucy's diner at about 1:00am and headed to the dive bar across the street for a drink. The place had a decent amount of customers for a Tuesday night, but what raised my suspicions was that everyone was gathered around the bar. There was one bartender working that night in the standard black t-shirt and she buzzed around from patron to patron every once in a while bringing by a drink. However, what was amazing to me was that after sitting and watching for a while, I realized that she was carrying on a conversation with nearly everyone sitting at the bar. I walked a little closer and found that they were n't just flirty comments or what restaurants were good around here either. The patrons were sharing their lives with this woman. She darted from person to person ( I counted 8 talking and another 10 listening ) soaking in their stories. Every once in a while she would softly give a response, and the recipient's face would immediately be flushed with comfort. 
 
 This is it. I knew it with every fiber of my being. All this time people have been looking for Mr. Almighty in churches and soup kitchens when they should have been looking for a Miss. Almighty in a little dive bar. I did n't say a single word. I calmly walked up to the bar, looked her in the eye, and slid my card across the wood. She did n't even read it. She stuck it in her pocket and turned her gaze on me. When she looked at me I felt like everything in the world stopped. Miss. Almighty said `` I'll call you tomorrow morning Johnathan. I know you've got some questions. But, then again, you've also got some answers that others do n't have''. I simply nodded, and walked out the door. I did n't call the press and I did n't call any churches. I went back across the street to Lucy's Diner, ordered some pancakes, and stared into the deep darkness in my coffee cup. There was no way that I was getting any sleep tonight.
