[ WP ] A big brother government has formed a new department that screens all media for anti-propaganda messages . The problem ? The department is full of literature teachers .

so by sheer coincidence, i happen to have the same name as /u/dumbc0llegekid's character - but i did n't want to change it, so here goes: 
 
 “ Johnson, I ’ m assigning you to Department 12. ” 
 
 
 The agent moaned. 
 
 
 “ Is that *really* necessary? ” 
 
 
 “ Since, ” his boss replied, in a tone lacking any sympathy, “ You have been entrusted with the responsibility of showing MacKenna - ” she paused, nodding at her newest agent, “ -around, I think that it would be only fair that you give her a full introduction. ” 
 
 
 Johnson stared at the Chief imploringly. She raised an arched eyebrow. 
 
 
 “ But- “ 
 
 
 “ You could use the opportunity to teach her why it ’ s a good idea to submit your reports on time. ” 
 
 
 Johnson opened his mouth, then sighed bitterly and turned to the young woman standing next to him. 
 
 
 “ God. Fine. The sooner we get this over with, the better. Come on. ” 
 
 
 “ Johnson. ” 
 
 
 “ Yes, Chief? ” 
 
 
 “ Be grateful I ’ m not sending you to 27. ” 
 
 
 MacKenna glanced nervously between Johnson, who was breathing deeply and heavily, and the Chief, who had returned to tending to the reports on her desk. She gave her a quick, awkward nod, before hurrying out of the office after her supervisor. 
 
 
 “ Uhm, ” she said, trotting in an attempt to keep up with Agent Johnson ’ s angry strides, “ What exactly is Department 12? ” 
 
 
 “ Hell, ” he grumbled, as stabbed the lift button with his finger. 
 
 
 “ Uhm, ” 
 
 
 Johnson glanced down at the confused face of his young colleague. He sighed, resigned. 
 
 
 “ Officially: Media Inspection Committee. Actual job: Sedition Review. Look for anti-Prop – that ’ s Propaganda – messages, all that stuff. ” 
 
 
 “ That doesn ’ t sound so bad, ” MacKenna offered. 
 
 
 “ See, ” grumbled Johnson, as the lift doors began to close, “ That ’ s usually what people say before things get really fucked. ” 
 
 
 - 
 
 
 Department 12 was located at the end of the eastern wing of the third floor of Block B. 
 
 
 Or, as Agent Johnson liked to call it, the entrance to hell. 
 
 
 MacKenna found herself waiting outside a pair of ominous steel doors, with a single large ‘ ’ 12 ’ ’ engraved on them – with a laser, she suspected – and an electronic entrypad to their left side. 
 
 
 “ Alright, ” said Johnson, turning to look at her, “ Here ’ s the plan. We go in, listen to their report, and get the fuck out of there. Your job is to say nothing and watch me. Then we go and get a coffee, because fuck Sandell. We ’ ve got an hour, as long as we get the report in, what does she care? ” 
 
 
 “ Uhm, maybe you shouldn ’ t talk about the Chief like that. ” 
 
 
 “ She knows. Doesn ’ t give a shit. You ’ ve seen her. Does she look like she gives a shit? ” he paused, and, answering his own question, continued, “ No. Let ’ s go. ” 
 
 
 MacKenna wasn ’ t sure what she was expecting, but somehow, Department 12 wasn ’ t it. There were the typical desks and chairs, but the room at the end of the hall seemed more like a sitting room than an office. In its centre was a large, wooden table, surrounded by several chairs that looked too comfortable to fit in a department budget. The table was covered with books, paper, and what looked like the remains of a plate of biscuits. Around it sat three men. 
 
 
 “ Alright, ” said Johnson in the tense manner one approaches a wild animal, “ I ’ m here for your report. ” 
 
 
 The men looked up at him, their faces lighting up at being asked to present their findings. Johnson frowned. 
 
 
 “ Well, as I ’ m sure you know, ” began the man with the black glasses, “ We ’ ve been analyzing the *Dragonman* movie. ” 
 
 
 “ Oooh, ” said MacKenna, “ I ’ ve been looking forward to that- sorry, ” she added hastily, noticing Johnson ’ s disapproving glare. 
 
 
 The man in the black glasses smiled warmly at her. 
 
 
 “ So, as I ’ m sure you know, the movie begins with Dragonman losing his job. He ’ s down and out, finds lost, and finds himself on the streets in a state of abject misery. ” 
 
 
 “ Which, ” said the man with the moustache, “ Is clearly an analogy for pre-Revolutionary society. ” 
 
 
 The corner of Johnson ’ s lip twitched. 
 
 
 “ Now, *Dragonman* ’ s recurring motif is, obviously, the dragon. What does a dragon symbolize? Well, if we look at representations of dragons throughout human culture and history, we see a traditional association with power and authority. The dragon as symbol, then, represents authority in its varied forms – authority over the self, authority over the state, a- “ 
 
 
 “ Please, ” growled Johnson. “ Skip ahead to the relevant bits. 
 
 
 Looking offended, the man with the moustache continued. “ If we take Dragonman ’ s own initial despair as a historical analogy, this first change – disruption to his norm – is clearly analogical to the period of turmoil we experienced during the Revolution. ” 
 
 
 “ And, ” the man with the green eyes added, “ Dragonman ’ s discovery of his dragon powers is a clear representation of the new Republic ’ s acquisition of power. ” 
 
 
 “ Which he uses to help people. So it ’ s positive, ” said Johnson. 
 
 
 “ Ah, ” said the man with the black glasses, “ Is it? You ’ re only looking at one layer. ” 
 
 
 “ What. ” 
 
 
 “ You see, ” he said, “ While on the surface, Dragonman overcoming his hardships may seem like a story representing progress and a development of his character, we can take the movie in a different light – as a satirical deconstruction of the *Dragonman* narrative. ” 
 
 
 “ What the fuck are you talking about. ” 
 
 
 “ We take for granted that Dragonman is the hero of his own story. If we, however, stop and analyse the movie, we see that it offers a different perspective- that Dragonman is as much the villain of *Dragonman* as X ’ thalr. ” 
 
 
 “ But, ” said MacKenna, “ Isn ’ t X ’ thalr obviously evil? … sorry. ” 
 
 
 “ See, ” said the man in the black glasses, his eyes glistening, “ These are the very assumptions the movie subverts. We, as viewers, assume a binary morality in its two central characters – an ethical dichotomy, if you will. X ’ thalr, while being the antagonist, is not evil. ” 
 
 
 “ So it ’ s bad, ” growled Johnson. 
 
 
 “ No, ” snapped the man with the moustache. “ That ’ s too simplistic. See, if we analyse the depictions of X ’ thalr, what stands out about him? ” 
 
 
 Johnson stared blankly. 
 
 
 “ He ’ s always framed in proximity to light. Whereas Dragonman… ” 
 
 
 “ Is usually in the shadows, ” gasped MacKenna. 
 
 
 “ Correct. And- “ 
 
 
 “ So what is your fucking conclusion? ” snapped Johnson. 
 
 
 “ Agent Johnson, ” said the man with the black glasses, visibly annoyed, “ That ’ s really quite rude of you. We haven ’ t even begin to talk about the use of colour, let alone the role of the third act- “ 
 
 
 “ For, ” snarled Johnson, rubbing his forehead with a finger and thumb, “ The love of *fucking* God, would you please just fucking tell me what your conclusion is? ” 
 
 
 The three men fell silent, before one finally spoke. 
 
 
 “ It ’ s a good movie, complex, lots of hidden meaning – can ’ t really say anything for certain. ” 
 
 
 - 
 
 
 “ I don ’ t know, ” said MacKenna as Johnson stormed down the corridor, “ They seemed nice. ” 
 
 
 - 
 
 
 Several months later, Agent Johnson received a DVD of the new Dragonman movie as a present from a friend. 
 
 
 He broke it in half. 

