I read this book (and many others) in the early stages of adopting our son. This book took every ounce of joy from the process. So many negative comments and connotations. This is the last book I would recommend to someone going through an adoption. The author clearly has issues pertaining to her adoption and is trying to push them off on those who became parents via adoption. Rather than inflict the negativity of this book upon yourself, choose a different book!